Written for The Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition
[Season 9] - Round 6: Link 'Em Up
Team: Chudley Cannons
Position: Beater 1 - Connect your fics by linking pairings. Hermione/Harry friendship.
Bonus Prompts:
8 (dialogue) "Is that really what you want?"
15 (emotion) guilt
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Written for Chudley Cannon Team Challenge
Prompt: Choose a song from your favourite band/artist to inspire your story: Iris by the goo goo dolls.
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Thanks to Ashleigh and Ray for betaing!
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TW: Misgendering. Internalized queerphobia (hinted). Queerphobia.
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Word count: 1784
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A/N part two? Why yes! (This also means there will be even more chapters in the future).
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Harry waited outside the door.
The last few weeks had been rough for Teddy. Andromeda had died after being ill for a very long time. They had gone to the funeral, and Teddy had officially moved in with Harry, Ginny, James, Albus and Lily.
But somehow, it didn't feel like the worst was over. The winter holidays had begun and it would be Teddy's first Christmas without his grandma.
Harry wanted to be there for Teddy, but he had never been good with words. Hermione was usually the one who knew what to say. And it seemed that every time Harry spoke with Teddy, he said the wrong thing and upset him.
He had finally reached a point where he knew he had to do something about it.
Harry opened the door to Teddy's new bedroom.
It was still pretty bare because most of his personal items were at Hogwarts, but there was a wardrobe, a desk and a bed in front of the window. Teddy sat on the bed, staring at nothing in particular. His hair differed from his usual blue and was now the same shade of brown as Remus' had been, but less grey.
Teddy forced a small smile, but quickly dropped it.
Harry closed the door behind him, sat next to Teddy, and put a hand on his knee. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to figure out what to say, but it seemed impossible. In the end, Teddy was the one who spoke.
"I miss Grandma."
Harry nodded slowly. He knew exactly what that was like. "I know. But it gets better, though. At some point. And you're such a strong boy. I know you'll be okay."
Harry had hoped his statement would be reassuring, but Teddy drew further into himself.
What was he missing? Why did everything he say have the opposite effect of what he wanted to achieve? Ironically, Harry wished Andromeda was there. She and Teddy had always had a special bond, and she would know exactly what to say.
"I'm here to talk, if you need it, alright?"
Teddy opened his mouth, but quickly closed it again.
Harry waited a few moments for Teddy to talk, but when it didn't happen, he got up to leave the room. Just as he put his hand on the door handle, Teddy spoke quickly.
"I'm non-binary."
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Harry coughed violently as soon as he stepped out of the fireplace.
Merlin, he was such an idiot. He shouldn't have said those things. Shouldn't have left Teddy like that—
Someone came over and began patting his back, and once he had finished, cast a cleaning spell over him. Harry looked up and was met with a pair of concerned brown eyes.
"Just the person I was looking for," he said as he put his arms around Hermione. "I need your help."
She nodded determinedly and pulled him into the kitchen where she flicked on the kettle. Harry loved Ron and Hermione's kitchen. It was the perfect mix of homely, like the Burrow, and modern like a muggle home, with a magical clock, dishes which did themselves and of course, a muggle toaster which made the toast pop.
"Where's Ron?" he asked suddenly.
"Out with Rose and Hugo," she answered, then sat opposite him. The tea finished and levitated itself onto the table in front of them. Hermione pulled her messy hair into a bun, clearly ready to take action if needed.
"What happened?"
Harry opened his mouth, but quickly closed it again. Would it be bad if he said it was about Teddy? "Someone," he began, "just came out to me, and I—" he hesitated. "I don't know what to do."
Hermione nodded slowly, her eyebrows furrowed. "Can you be more specific? Came out as what?"
He wrung his hands. "Er, non-binary or something like that." Harry shook his head. That part wasn't important, what was important was that Teddy needed his help. Clearly, something wasn't right. "I need your help on how to fix it."
Hermione remained non-judgmental. "Fix what, exactly?"
"Well," Harry blurted but then hesitated. "It's not normal, is it?"
She glared at him, but took a deep breath before talking again. "Harry. Is this what you're thinking, or is it someone else?"
The Dursleys.
They had been obsessed with appearing 'normal', and shunned everything which didn't fit into their idea of what a perfectly normal family should look like. It was the reason Aunt Petunia didn't speak with his mum before she died, and why they had disliked Harry so much growing up.
He had a tendency to do the same sometimes, unconsciously, of course. But Harry didn't think this was one of those times. What happened with Teddy… maybe it was an illness. All of this had to be confusing to him, and of course he had weird thoughts like that. He had recently lost someone close to him.
The same thing had happened to Harry right after Sirius fell through the veil. He had begun… thinking about boys, in a way you weren't supposed to think about boys. But it had just been a phase (granted, one that seemed to reappear from time to time) and whatever Teddy thought he was, would disappear sometime soon.
Harry wanted to help him with that.
"Why can't you just be normal?" he'd asked Teddy before he'd thought about it.
"It is normal," Teddy had said and he'd yelled at him for thinking so.
"It is what I think," he finally said. "This person needs help."
"Is that really what you want?" Hermione leaned over the table, mug in hand. She let Harry contemplate the question before continuing. "I think you're making a rash decision because you don't understand. I can explain it, if you want."
Harry hesitated, but eventually nodded. After all, Hermione knew many things, and she was good at explaining them. Plus, it was the whole reason he had sought her out.
Hermione straightened her back.
"Sex and gender are two different things. Sex is what we're assigned at birth, I'm female and you're male, and some people are intersex. Gender is a social construct, it's the reason I have long hair and you have short hair, and why we dress the way we do. We have constructed these ideas of how men and women are supposed to behave and look."
She stopped herself, glancing at Harry quickly to make sure he understood.
"Some people don't fit into the male or female category, and because gender is a social construct, we can create as many as we want. One of those is non-binary."
"Yes, Harry. I'm sure. I've been thinking about it for a very long time, and I feel better as non-binary than a boy."
"Get this nonsense out of your head."
Harry sipped his tea and put it down slowly. He chewed on his lip before answering. "I think I understand what you mean. Maybe, but… it doesn't really make sense to me."
Hermione nodded seriously. "It doesn't have to. It just needs to make sense to the person who chose it, and they just wanted you to know who they are. As long as it makes them happy, it can't be all bad, can it?"
"No, I… I suppose not. But is it really necessary?"
"Is it really necessary for you to be a man? Why can't you just be a woman?"
He frowned. "Because I'm not a woman."
"Well," Hermione said, folding her hands on the table. "This person is neither a man nor a woman. They're just a person."
"Oh."
"Why do you have to talk about this? Why does it even matter? Can't you just be a boy?
Harry wasn't sure what to say now. What Hermione said made sense, and in the end, maybe it didn't matter if Teddy was non-binary and not a man. If calling himself non-binary made him happy, then yes, perhaps it was okay.
Harry suddenly felt nauseous. He had made such a big deal out of nothing, and the things he had said to Teddy before running off to speak with Hermione was unacceptable. He would have to do something to make up for how terribly he had treated Teddy. The boy didn't need this on top of everything with Andromeda.
Harry knew it might take a while to get used to, especially because he still couldn't wrap his head around the concept that someone could be neither a man nor a woman, but he was just going to have to try his best.
First things first, as Hermione would say.
"What's the best way to support this person?"
Hermione smiled triumphantly, and Harry rolled his eyes fondly; she always loved winning an argument. "We can start with the basics — and you have to ask this person to know — but they might prefer a different name, or different pronouns."
Harry hated to ask, but he had to make an effort to learn, for Teddy. "What's pronouns?"
She tapped her fingers on the table. "She or he are pronouns. Someone who is non-binary might prefer 'they'. Although there are other options, so you have to ask them."
Harry thought for a moment.
This is Teddy. They are non-binary.
Was that it?
That seemed simple enough to learn.
"Thank you, 'Mione." Harry ran his hands through his hair, messing it up even more. "I don't know what I would do without you."
Probably something horrible which would make Teddy hate him forever. Harry shook his head; it wouldn't do him any good to think about it like that. He would just have to apologize to Teddy, do his best to learn the new pronouns, and support him the best way he could.
Hermione smiled and sipped her tea with a smug smile. "You know, sometimes I wonder the same thing."
Harry smiled wryly. "How do you know all this stuff anyway?"
"As part of my campaign to be Minister of Magic, I want the Wizarding World to be more inclusive. In the beginning, I thought mostly of muggleborns, lycanthropes and sorcerers of colour, but the muggles have begun talking about sexual orientations and gender identities, and I wanted to include that too."
Harry nodded. Of course that was something Hermione would care about. She always cared about the underdogs.
He drank the last of his tea. "I can't thank you enough, 'Mione. I would love to stay, but I think I have to go apologize now."
"Good luck with that then." Hermione smiled and pulled him in for a hug.
Harry walked through the fireplace, feeling much better and hoping Teddy would find it in their heart to forgive him.
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