Ghiriham's Cooking Adventure
Legend of Zelda
Pairings: None
Warning: Organs cut and eaten, crack, extreme violence
Disclaimer: I do not own The Legend of Zelda.
Chapter count: 2/?
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"Welcome back folks to another edition of Ghirham's Cooking Adventure. Today we are making bone noodles and blood soup from Revali from Breath of the Wild!"
"And now here's your host, Ghiriham from Skyward Sword!"
"Thank you. Now as Dark Link was so kind to inform us, we will be making bone noodles and blood soup from this fine specimen of a Rito."
"It seems our host was to get a sword instead of the usual chef knife. We are in for a show today!"
"Now stay still and this will be painless." He swings the sword down and the head falls off followed by a waterfall of blood.
"Now, put the head off to the side. It will be used later."
"Collect the blood to make the broth and skin the head to help make the noodles."
The blood is collected in a bowl and the bones are in an another bowl. The remains are thrown away.
"Now put the blood with some sand to thicken it and let it boil over a magna pit." The bowl of blood and sand is put over the magna pit and the bone bowl is grabbed.
"Scrape out the inside of the bones and then grab the head and scoop out the eyeballs. Mash the eyeballs and then add sand and combine well. Finally, add the bone marrow and stir well." The mixture is stirred until combined.
"When the mixture is combined well, move next to the bowl of blood and drop in the bone mixture in strips so it becomes noodles. They should cook quickly."
"That looks tasty doesn't it folks?"
"Finally, when the noodles are cooked, pull the broth off the heat and enjoy. Please remember this soup and noodles isn't meant to be enjoyed by Hylians."
"You heard it here, folks. See you next time!"
