(The Next day, Broflovski Residents)
Kyle Broflovski and his beloved wife, Bebe Stevens, were brushing their teeth in front of the bathroom mirror.
Bebe wore a Bright red Nightdress while Kyle wore only his Green-striped pajama pants.
Bebe was first to spit into the sink. Kyle tried to, but the spit got caught in his red beard.
"Aw shit!" Kyle said.
"I told you you should shave that thing off." Bebe Said.
"No way, I like it," Kyle replied as he tried to wipe the toothpaste spit out of his beard.
"Well, I don't. I miss that sexy baby face of yours."
Kyle smiled then took Bebe in his arms.
"Aw, come on, you don't sometimes like to imagine having relations with a sexy Mountain man type?"
Bebe smiled then kissed her hubby on the forehead.
"Kyle, I used to imagine having sex with you a lot, and I still do but not with that beard. Your Shaving it this weekend."
Bebe then walked out of the bathroom and began to change into her business pantsuit.
Kyle tried to take a quick peek of his wife getting undressed but was interrupted when he heard the downstairs door open, and the two listened to their son walking in.
"Dammit," Kyle said to himself.
"Mom, Dad, I'm home," Jacob called up to his parents.
"Up here, sweetheart," Bebe said.
Kyle looked back at his wife, and to his disappointment, she had just finished changing into her business attire.
"Ya know, Bebe, would it hurt you to change a little slower?"
Bebe smiled at her husband.
"Not when our son is here, my love. Ask me that question again when you have shaved that Beard of yours."
Before leaving the room, Bebe gave her husband a quick but loving kiss on his cheek before walking out of the room.
Jacob then walked in.
"So, dad, how long until you and mom get home?" Jacob asked.
"Well, your mom's got a lot of important meetings today, and I have several surgeries to perform today, so we probably won't be home till around ten or eleven a clock. Are you sure you don't want a babysitter, son? This will be the longest you have ever been home alone."
"C'mon, dad, im eight years old; I'm practically an adult. I can take care of myself; besides, the guys will be coming over later, so I won't be by myself for many hours."
Kyle sighed.
"Okay, but you have your mother's and my cell phone numbers on your phone, right?"
Jacob rolled his eyes.
"Yes, dad."
"As well as the number of the hospital?"
"Yes, father, I do."
"Good, now get out. I gotta change."
(Hours later)
Jacob, Stanley, Dani, and Herman had been Digging around the Broflovski backyard for what felt like hours with no results to show for it.
"Herman, be careful. My mom is obsessed with her Cyclamen plants. If even one of them is dug up, I'll be grounded for a year." Jacob said.
"Hey, I think I found something," Dani said.
The other three boys ran over to Dani and helped him dig until they found an old beat-up stovetop hat.
"Wow, I can't believe this is the very same hat that brought the snowman to life," Stanley said.
"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's build a snowman." Dani said.
"Whoa, whoa, hold on. I was all for finding it and everything but, do you think that making a snowman and putting this hat on him is a great idea?" Herman asked.
"Herman's right; maybe we should think about this for a little while before we do anything," Stanley said.
Jacob was about to say something but was interrupted when he heard the doorbell ring.
"Who the heck is that be?" Jacob asked.
" Maybe it's Mr. Harrison trying to sell bibles to everyone, again," Dani said.
"I'll check."
Jacob walked back into his house, opened the door, and to his surprise, he saw Patty Tweak, Nancy Donovan, Bertha Stoley, and Theodora Thorn waiting on his stoop.
Nancy was the first to talk.
She leaned in and kissed her boyfriend on the cheek.
"Hey boo, mind if we come in?" Nancy asked.
"Sure. I know we had a date today, but I thought that wasn't until 2:00, and weren't we going to meet in the park?" Jacob asked.
"Don't worry, we will, but this for something different. Are the other guys here?"
"Ya, why?"
Without answering, Bertha, patty, and Theodora all walked out into the backyard. Jacob wanted to follow, but as he was about to, Nancy pulled him back.
"Jacob, there is something important I want to ask you."
(outside)
Dani was the first to notice the three girls walking out of Jacob's house.
"So what are you goons up to?" Bertha asked.
"We were looking through some old junk," Herman said before hiding the
Hat under some snow.
"What are you girls doing? here?" Dani asked.
"Well, we came to ask you, boys, a critical question," Theodora asked as she looked at Herman affectionately.
"Which is?" Stanley asked.
"We wanted to know if you guys would like to be our dates to the Seige of Madrid memorial dance? And remember, it's an unwritten rule at school that once you have been asked, you can't say no."
The three boys were quiet for a moment until Herman spoke up.
"So who would be going with who then?" Dani asked.
"Well, you'll be going with me, Dani," Bertha said.
"And Herman, you will be my date," Theodora said as she put her arm around Herman's.
Dani and Herman shrugged, then both said: ok.
Neither boys minded since they both knew Bertha and Theadora very well. Dani and Bertha, we're both heads of the science fiction club, while Herman and Theodora knew each other from the Foreign Language Club.
Bertha and Theodora began to discuss plans for the dance while leaving Stanley and patty to themselves.
Stanley smiled at patty but noticed that his girlfriend looked befuddled.
"You ok, Babe?"
Patty didn't look up till she felt Stanley's ungloved hands hold her gloved ones.
"What's wrong, patty?"
"Stanley, I wanna go to the dance with you…but part of me thinks I shouldn't."
Stanley looked confused.
"W-why not?"
"Because I don't know where our relationship is going, Stanley. We've been officially boyfriend and girlfriend since last thanksgiving, but ever since then, you have never called me; whenever we meet up at school, you act like im one of your buddies instead of your girlfriend; we've never even gone on an actual date. I want to be your girlfriend; I have since we first met in preschool. I need you to want to be in this relationship, and if you don't, then I'll understand."
Stanley looked down for a moment, then back at patty.
"Im sorry I haven't been a good boyfriend to you, patty. There's a reason I haven't been very romantic around you."
"What is it?"
"Patty, when my parents were young, my dad had a crush on my mom, and whenever he would be around her, and you know have feelings for her and stuff like that, well he would Barf all over her, and she would be grossed out by it. It took my dad years to gain control over it finally."
"Stanley, what does that have to do with any of this?"
" I'm getting to that. Remember when your parents came over last Thanksgiving, and I took one look at you, and I puked in my Beanie hat?"
"Ya, but I didn't think anything of it at the time; I just assumed you had a stomach bug."
"I was doing what my dad did when he was a kid. The reason I haven't been so romantic around you is that I didn't want to puke all over you, and you know, gross you out."
Patty put her hands on Both of Stanley's shoulders and looked into his Ice blue eyes.
"Stanley, I don't care about that. If dealing with barf means, I get to have a sweet and brave boy like you as a boyfriend; then it's worth it."
"Really? But it's so weird."
"If your mom could find a way to deal with it, so will I. Besides, you've seen my Papa and twin brother; I think I know how to handle weird."
The six kids then went into the house, where they found Jacob on the couch, his face covered in kiss marks, while Nancy stood over him.
"Im going to the dance with Nancy," Jacob said, smitten.
As the boys and girls began to discuss their plans for the dance, a Squirrel ran towards the hat and tried to check around it for nuts; ice-like fangs came out of the snow and closed on the poor Rodent before it had time to escape.
(The Next day)
Jacob yawned as he opened the back door and walked out into the backyard.
Jacob was wearing pajamas similar to the ones his father used to wear, but instead of Terrence and Phillip on them, it was Beavis and Butthead.
"So, where did you put it, Herman?" Jacob asked over the phone as he suppressed a yawn.
"It should be right next to your mom's garden, near the right corner," Herman said on the other line.
" Okay, thanks, Herman. I'll see you tonight." Jacob said before hanging up his phone.
Jacob looked in the area Herman had described, and his eyes went wide in horror. He saw the multiple mutilated animal corpses as well as a giant red stain in the snow.
To be continued
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