A/N: Thanks for reading and commenting! Just so you know (because I forgot to tell you in my last note) I made Lisbon's "weird" thing football instead of just reading like Belle. Why? Well, it's canon and the birthday girl loves football.

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It was approaching lunchtime, and she'd still not seen Minnelli. She'd expected him back from Malibu this morning. When he wasn't in his office, she sent him a message. No response. Then, she called him. Straight to voicemail. It was very unlike him. By lunchtime, without a word from him, she turned on her Find my Friends app.

While computers were still hard for a lot of the guys around the office, the introduction of smart phones had completely blown their minds. Minnelli had a hard time using his phone and kept leaving it lying around in random places in the CBI, restaurants, and crime scenes. So to streamline the inevitable phone search process, she had set this up to find his phone. Looking at the GPS coordinates, she could tell he was still in Malibu not far from where the four missing people disappeared.

She tapped on her desk as she thought about whether she should call someone to check on him or just go out herself. In nearly a split second, she decided she should go check up on him. Maybe he just lost his phone, and it was nothing. There was no need to involve anyone else and make it seem like he was somehow incompetent-she'd heard those whispers too. She threw on her jacket and grabbed her keys to head out.

"Teresa!"

She groaned softly as she rolled her eyes. "It's not a good time, Agent Pike. Can I catch up with you later?"

He ran in front of her, placing his hand on her upper arm to stop her. "It's Marcus, and I was hoping we could talk now. Minnelli called my boss yesterday."

"What?"

"Yeah, he asked that I not be allowed here without an escort. Do you know anything about this?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't." In fact, she asked him not to call the FBI.

Marcus hummed before softening his eyes. "Well, I don't know what the hell that geezer's deal is. We all know he's past his expiration date around here anyway. Don't worry though! Bertram smoothed it all over and said I was still welcome in the building. I've been looking for Minnelli to see what his problem is. Do you know where I can find him?"

"Actually, I don't. Marcus, I don't know what's going on. I'm on my way out." She moved toward the elevator, but held her arm firmly.

"Can we get dinner tonight and talk?"

She sighed heavily. "No, we can't. Like I said, it's not a good time right now."

Marcus took her hand, which elicited some laughter in the hallway. She really wished he hadn't. "Teresa, I get the impression you're avoiding me."

Well, at least he was good at reading context clues. "It's not a good time, Marcus."

Why didn't he ever check in on her before going off on one of these tangents? If he knew the first thing about her, he would have. He would have known how worried she was about her boss and how she didn't have time to stand in the very public corridor and reject his offers right now.

"Well, tell me when it's a good time. Teresa, I want to spend time with you. You're all I think about."

She did a double take. "I'm all you think about? You must not have much going on in your life."

He chuckled. "Not without you. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever met. Me. You. We'd be great together. Think of how great our kids would be. Cute little combinations of the best of both of us."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Our kids?!"

She could literally hear Ray Haffner laughing at her as he walked past. Great. This would be community gossip now.

"Yeah, I just assumed that…"

She shook his hand off of hers. "Yeah, you assume a lot, Agent Pike. I'm not interested, especially in a man who has apparently taken it upon himself to plan out my entire life without even consulting me at that. This is weird and not appropriate. And another thing! Don't disrespect Minnelli. Ever. He's like family to me."

Hurt flashed across his face. "Oh. Teresa, I know I can come off a bit strong sometimes. It's just how I am. I didn't mean...well, I'm so into you. I've never felt this way about anyone before. When we went out…"

"Two beers. We had two beers. One time. Nothing else happened."

"I know that, but I'm in love with you! I have a plan for us!"

She sighed. "I don't have time for this now or ever really in the office. This is where I work. I'm not here looking for dates or some prince to whisk me away from all of it."

"I get it. You're busy. But can we talk later?"

"About this? No. About anything related to work? Yes. I have to go!"

Sensing that mopey look settling in on his face would result in another round of pleas, she practically sprinted away from him. She was worried about Minnelli and didn't have time to manage his emotions at the moment.

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Minnelli's car was parked along the beach. She looked in through the windows and searched the area around the car. There were no signs of struggle. Nothing was amiss-besides the fact that his car was left here.

Looking around, she made her way down to the beach. She removed her boots before walking into the sand. She wondered if Minnelli had come here to look around. What if something was wrong with his car? No signs of struggle indicated that he'd not been forcefully removed from this spot.

As she continued to look around from her vantage point on the beach, she noticed a mansion nearby. From her understanding, the mansion was abandoned. In their initial search, locals told them that the house's owner, Patrick Jane, wasn't home. Well, they'd not seen him lately, but he was accustomed to entertaining guests or just whisking away on extended trips. Something felt hinky about him, but he wasn't home and no one had been able to locate him. There seemed to be nothing there.

In any case, she walked toward the mansion. If Minnelli was in distress, he would have gone towards shelter to seek help. He could be there. But if he were there, was something wrong? Though she was always great at maintaining a cool exterior, that led her panic to set in.

Approaching the mansion, she knocked on the front door. There was no response, until the third knock. At the third knock, the door opened. Expecting to introduce herself, she was a little thrown off when no one appeared behind the door. She frowned. Something seemed off about this house, but she couldn't quite place it other than it made her feel ill at ease.

She took a moment to square herself up before entering. It wouldn't do for a well-established agent of the CBI to get spooked by a house.

She walked in through the hallway. "Hello? Agent Lisbon of the CBI. Is anyone here?"

She continued walking into the large home. For such a modern place, it was awfully dark and cold. Frankly, it sent a shiver down her spine. "Hello? I just want to ask a few questions. I'm looking for someone."

After a few minutes, she heard someone else. "He's in the basement."

She turned. "Who's there?"

Nothing again. Was she hearing things or was someone screwing with her?

"Basement."

"Alright. Who's there? Show yourself! My name is Teresa Lisbon with the CBI. I'm looking for Virgil Minnelli. He's also a CBI agent."

Nothing. With her hand hovering above her sidearm, she continued a tour of the house.

"Is anyone there? Minnelli?"

Finally, she heard it. "Lisbon!"

"Minnelli? Is that you?"

"It is. Careful don't make too much noise. I'm in the basement."

Ok. Right. This wasn't weird at all. Who the hell would take a CBI agent captive?

She looked around the kitchen. "Boss?"

"Here! Get me the hell out of here." She spotted the door that he must be behind.

"Boss? Are you ok? Should I call for a bus?"

"I took a tumble down the stairs, and I'm a bit busted up."

A tumble down the stairs? She closed her eyes, thankful she'd come alone without raising the alarm bells. An agent falling down the stairs and trapping himself in the basement would be subject to the cruelest of jokes, especially if that agent were Minnelli. As Pike put it, many thought he was already beyond his "expiration date" at the CBI. In any case, she needed to help him get out.

"There's no reception here or on the beach. Can you break down the door? I've not been able to move it."

No, she didn't imagine so. It was solid oak. She noticed something move behind her. Pulling her sidearm, she turned quickly.

"Who's there? I'm not asking again. If you come out and get this door open, we can talk."

"Um, Lisbon?"

"Yeah."

"Not to sound crazy, but I think the house is alive."

"What do you mean alive?"

"The objects. They move and they talk."

Great. He might have a head injury to boot! Now, that might require paperwork.

"Boss, how did you end up here?"

"I was looking for help with my car. I needed to dial out. There's no cell service." He paused. "When I came in the house, a beast dragged me down here. Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but that's what happened. It's why I told you to be quiet. You have your sidearm?"

"I do."

"Well, stay on alert."

He hadn't needed to issue that warning because just then, she heard a growl behind her. She drew her weapon.

"CBI! Show yourself now!"

With a roar, there it was: some animal standing on two legs.

"You dare enter my house without permission?"

She was momentarily stunned. It was on two legs...and talking! "The door was open."

"Hmm. I bet it was. You types love saying that."

She shook her head. "Who are you? What are you?"

"None of your business! You dare enter my home and ask me questions?"

"You're...Patrick Jane?"

She'd seen photos of the television psychic. Those golden curls and sharp blue eyes with a perfect grin did not match the beast before her. Wait. Those blue eyes. She focused on the beast's blue eyes. Was this really Patrick Jane?

"In the flesh, so to speak. I take it you're Agent Lisbon?"

"How...did you know my name? Is it because you're a psychic?" Weird thing was: she'd never believed in psychics.

He roared. "Psychics aren't real! You came in shouting your name, so loud you could raise the dead!"

"Right." Her exasperation quickly turned to indignation as she frowned and steadied the hand holding her gun. Who the hell did this guy, beast, animal thing think he was?

She felt her temper flare as she raised her voice. "Well, it's standard procedure to announce myself, just like it's standard procedure not to keep CBI agents captive in your basement. Let Agent Minnelli out of your basement now!"

"No can do. See, he—like you are right now—was trespassing."

"That doesn't mean you can imprison him here! You're holding him hostage!"

Minnelli defended himself. "The door was open when I got here!"

The beast grunted. "A likely story with you coppers."

"So do you plan to take me prisoner as well?"

"Are you going to keep pointing that gun at me? It won't do anything to me. Believe me: I've tried. But if it makes you feel any better, hold on."

She didn't know why, but she startled a bit at the idea that he'd tried to harm himself. Patrick Jane was a human man, but whatever was standing—and talking!—in front of her was not. Maybe...maybe she'd ingested something and then had massive hallucinations. Maybe they both were. Maybe it was like that episode of The X-Files and she was trapped underground being slowly digested by a fungus.

In any case, she needed to control the situation so they could get out of here. "Let him go!"

"Or what?"

She shrugged. "Why do you need me to threaten you? Clearly, I'm hallucinating. Or you've set up some fancy smoke and mirrors game. I don't know what this game is, but I'm certainly not amused."

"I can assure you that you're seeing me. I don't choose to release your Agent Minnelli, unless you have something to sweeten the offer."

She heard Minnelli moan softly. He might have minimized his injuries before. She wasn't entirely sure what moved her to say her following words.

"Take me. I'll stay in his place."

The beast raised his eyebrows. "You'd take his place?"

"No! No, she won't!"

"Boss, it's ok." She returned to the beast. "Yes, I will take his place. I'm not afraid of you."

He was silent for a moment, almost like he was taking her in. Her height had never been her friend, but she drew her shoulders back to take up space and assert herself.

When he responded, he spoke barely above a whisper. "No, you certainly aren't. You're more angry that I've questioned your authority than frightened of an absolute beast. That's very interesting. Fine! One of you stays and the other goes. Once the door shuts, it stays closed."

He opened the door, and Minnelli popped out. "Lisbon! Let's get out of here."

"At at! A deal is a deal. Right, Agent Lisbon? Get in. Or are you scared?"

She reached into her pocket. "Here, take my keys. My car is out on the beach near yours."

"May as well give him your phone too. It won't work here. Surely, he'll want to call for help on the way out. His is probably dead."

He sounded...arrogant. She handed Minnelli her phone anyway. As she did, he grabbed her hands.

"Lisbon, don't do this. I don't know what game this monster is playing…"

He roared at hearing the word "monster."

"Maybe you should count your blessings and go before I change my mind. I only need one of you."

She moved onto the landing behind the door. "Boss, please just go. I'll be fine. Shut the door!"

The beast slammed the door, making her shudder. It seemed so permanent.

She heard Minnelli yelling and demanding she be released, but his yelling seemed to get further away. The last thing she heard clearly was: "I'll be back for you, Lisbon!"

For the first time in a long time, she felt a tear fall. What did she do? This was some kind of nightmare, right? After walking around a bit, she curled into a ball in the corner.