Hermione couldn't wait. At least not that long. She didn't think so.

All in all, she had a good day, much more enjoyable than being stuck in a hospital bed for sure. Ginny was to thank for that, as she gave Hermione a tour of her house and brought her up to speed on what everyone was doing. From George's roaring success in the joke shop, to Luna's adventures looking for horned snorkacks. Still, she left anything remotely related to Ron out of her tale, and it was driving Hermione mad.

"When you were gone was when we finally realized how much you meant to him," Ginny had said at breakfast.

What did that mean though? Did Ron just fancy her, or had his feelings for her run deeper? Was that only back then, or did he still feel something for her now?

Hermione needed to know, because as much as that was Ron's past, it was pretty much her present. She could still feel Ron's lips on her own, as if it had truly just happened a few days ago. And her heart was burning to know what came after that long overdue kiss.

It took a great amount of self-control to not storm Ginny with questions. Unfortunately, the few times she put traps for her to spill something more, her friend dodged them masterfully.

Harry returned home a few hours later. The first thing he did after kissing Ginny, was ask Hermione how she was doing. He looked more at ease now than when he had first seen her return, but there was something there that Hermione couldn't quite decipher as well. Harry wasn't as good at hiding things, and five years had not changed that. He was more sloppy at dodging Hermione's questions than Ginny had been, and it was soon painfully obvious that they were keeping something from her. However, Hermione just couldn't get anything out of them, and went to bed with her head full of doubts.

The next day only got worse.

After a small argument, Hermione had been able to convince Ginny that it was fine to leave her alone for the day. Harry promised to be home early to prepare a special dinner, but he was out for the whole morning as well. As soon as they left and, contrary to what she had expected, Hermione realized that she wasn't really prepared to be all by herself. Not entirely.

The house suddenly felt enormous, and the quietness was dreadfully unnerving. A silent place to work had always been the preferred setting for Hermione, but it just didn't feel right now. She had hoped that the free time would help her plan her upcoming days, however, her thoughts kept wandering to Ron more often than was sustainable for any kind of task to be productive.

If only I knew about him… If only he knew about me…

Sorting out a schedule of the possible places in Australia where her parents could be proved to be a task that she was unable to finish. Hermione couldn't put two words on paper without her eyes turning back to the door. As impossible as it was, she kept imagining Ron coming into the room and trying to divert her attention to any of the dozens of things he found more worthy of their time. He would make her laugh — as only he could — and then she would argue back and banter, pretending she wasn't enjoying the distraction.

Hermione shook her head and made a monumental effort to focus, but she just couldn't. Even trying to go through the book that Professor McGonagall had given to her was no use, as it only reminded her of the battle… of that lingering kiss… of all the things that were left unsaid for far too long. She had forgiven Ron for leaving when they had talked at Shell Cottage, but so many other things had happened afterwards, that Hermione felt like she could barely hold in all of the things she wanted to share with him.

For Merlin's sake! So many things had happened before that! She had just been too afraid and vulnerable to bring them up when she had been recovering at Shell Cottage.

If only I had known…

Hadn't she known though? Sure, she didn't know Fate was going to play some sort of sick joke on her and rob her of five years of her life, but it wasn't exactly as if she felt there would be plenty of time to be honest. She knew they were fighting a war, and any of them could've died at any moment.

I should've told him when I had the chance…

Unable to deal with the regret and the silence a second longer, Hermione went down to Grimmauld Place's library. Books kept her mind occupied from things for a while, but the little comfort they brought was short-lived. It wasn't long before she found herself faced with the same unnerving silence as before and, eventually, her mind found its way back to Ron.

He was out there. It felt almost ludicrous to imagine Ron going on about his day without knowing that she was alive. Doing who-knows-what on some mysterious trip that Hermione knew nothing about. Instead of trying to find him, Hermione was just sitting there as if she could afford to wait for his return. As if she could wait to know what his current feelings for her were.

She felt impassive. Frustrated. Useless. It was like being back in the nothingness. Not moving. Just letting things pass her by.

What else can I do? Go out and look for him?

The idea did cross her mind, especially since it felt as if there was something monumental that Harry and Ginny weren't telling her. Hermione even imagined how she would start her search, and how she would go about to avoid being recognized, but she didn't entertain the thought for long. Going out there was irrational, she should wait for Harry at least. If she was clear enough with her intentions to see Ron, he would have to help her.

So that was precisely what she did, though time appeared to move even more slowly as she waited. However, once he returned, Harry appeared much more interested in preparing dinner than talking about Ron. And infuriating as it was, Hermione decided to play along until she found the perfect opportunity to ask her questions.

"Help me out with dinner?" he asked.

"Lead the way," she replied.

o0o0o

There wasn't much Hermione could help with, to be honest. This new Harry seemed way more apt in the art of cookery than the one Hermione had known before. He moved through his kitchen swiftly and without doubting each spice he picked, leaving her to try to follow as best as she could. She ended up mostly looking over pots, passing ingredients, and giving her opinion on how this or that tasted; which she had to say, was properly delicious.

"When did you learn all of this?"

"What do you mean?" Harry asked, confused. He had just thrown a spell at the cutting board, and a flying knife was now chopping an onion at a rapid speed.

"I mean, you weren't a cooking expert back then. I could've used the help when we were living in that tent," she said, trying to not let the sour memories from those times reach her.

Harry gave her a half-smile as he shrugged, "One picks up things. And don't tell her I said so, but Ginny's dinners can still use some work."

Hermione rolled her eyes, but still couldn't hold back a small laugh. "And of all the things you could pick up, you choose a cooking book?"

"A cooking book? I did no such thing. I'm not you, Hermione."

"Then how—"

"Trial and error," he interrupted. "Ginny and I had to brave through our fair share of dreadful attempts before we got to something edible. Got some pointers from Molly as well."

Hermione arched an eyebrow at him as she checked to see if the soup was done yet. She didn't miss the fact that he had called Mrs Weasley by her first name, which did make perfect sense, but it still had caught her off guard.

"It's great to have you back," he said, giving her that weird look he had given her every once in a while the past few days. As if she might vanish if he looked away for long enough.

"I don't really feel as if I ever left in the first place, but it's great to be back, regardless of the how," she said, offering him a little smile. Even though it was bad missing the last five years of their lives, it was better to be back than not at all. And five years was bad, but she had to admit ten years would have been worse. After an easy pause, she spoke again without turning to him, "So… you and Ginny seem closer now."

A good honest laugh was his first reaction, "You could say so. Though Ginny would say that the bed is still too big."

The implications made Hermione blush slightly. Even if he had grown in plenty of ways, Harry was still his old self in many others, and it was soon evident that he hadn't meant to say something like that to her. His cheeks even reddened a bit as he looked nervously away.

"It doesn't surprise me," Hermione continued, not wanting the awkwardness to stop the conversation, "She's still quite… spirited. It looks like marriage has agreed with her."

"It has agreed with both of us," Harry admitted, "I never thought that I would love her as much as I do. Never been happier."

Hermione's eyes widened some, for that was the most honest Harry had ever been about his feelings in front of her. And still, she didn't need him to say it to know that her friends loved each other, Hermione was more than capable of seeing that in the few moments she saw them together. Their love was plain to see by the way they held hands or looked at each other, and the way they could almost communicate wordlessly. Harry and Ginny were a young couple that looked towards each moment with excitement, but at times it appeared as if they had been together for much longer than five years.

"I'm glad for you two, I truly am."

"Thanks. Fate has been smiling at us lately. Maybe it felt guilty for all of the rubbish it put us through in Hogwarts, but things are good now. Life has truly been brilliant since the war," he said, just before trailing off and giving a cautious glance at Hermione from the corner of his eye, "I mean, it hasn't all been perfect. Everyone missed you, tons. I'm sorry if I made it seem as if—"

"You don't need to apologize," she cut him off. Only Harry would apologize for something like that. "I understand that life goes on. I didn't expect any of you to spend the rest of your life moping just because you thought I was gone."

Harry's face turned sour inexplicably, and he lowered his eyes. "Err, yes, of course."

What had just happened? Hermione couldn't understand his reaction. There was definitely something he was hiding, it was glaringly obvious at this point. And, for some twisted reason, Hermione guessed it had something to do with Ron. Her heart raced, afraid of what they could be hiding from her.

"Harry…" she started, putting the wooden spoon down.

"Do you like what we've done with the house?" he hurriedly asked.

"What?"

"The house. Do you like it?" he insisted in what had to be the worst attempt ever at changing the subject.

"Well, yes. It's lovely, but—"

Hermione didn't get to press him more, because right then Ginny arrived and walked into the kitchen. "Mum says hi. I made a short stop at the Burrow on my way here. She wanted me to tell you that you're welcome to pass by whenever you feel like it, as if you didn't know that already," she said, before noticing the odd behaviour, "What's wrong?"

"Look, I know there's something that you two—" Hermione started, but was cut off by Harry.

"The lamb is ready! Help me out with the dishes! Ginny?" he asked.

Ginny didn't look like she understood what was wrong yet, but she did however understand her husband's look, and hurried to help Harry, effectively making Hermione lose her chance at asking more about Ron.

This was getting unbearable. Hermione needed to find what was going on. One way or the other.

o0o0o

Dinner was very good, more tasty than she had hoped for. So Harry took advantage of it and tried to keep the conversation on his cookery skills and other small talk as much as he could. He must have sensed Hermione's uneasy mood. Halfway through though, he found a better way of taking Hermione's mind away from asking unwanted questions.

"So, I talked with Kingsley today. He wanted to know how you were doing," he said.

Kingsley. The new minister. That had changed as well.

"And what did you tell him?"

"That you would be on your feet in no time. He had no trouble believing it," he said just before putting a small potato in his mouth.

"Not that we're pressuring of course," Ginny hurried to add.

Harry got the hint and quickly swallowed down his mouthful to agree. "Not at all. Take it as easy as you have to. You can stay here and have all the time you need."

Hermione nodded, "Thanks. It's still overwhelming, if you must know. But soon I'll be going on ahead with my plans."

"About those plans... Are you thinking of going back to Hogwarts? I know Professor McGonagall offered you a place," Harry said, looking at her attentively as he continued with his dinner.

"I'll need to if I want a good job. Even so, I'm not saying it won't be strange going there when everyone there is so young."

"I wouldn't be that bad, would it? You won't look much older than anyone there," Harry said, casually.

Ginny gave him a hard look, which he didn't understand until Hermione answered. "I meant it would be odd for me."

Hermione realized that the last time she had seen her future classmates, they had been just first years. What would they think of her now? Based on the book she had gotten from Professor McGonagall, it was a given that she was famous as well. It was definitely overwhelming, to say the very least.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean—"

"It's alright. I told Professor McGonagall that I would send an answer by next week. I'll probably accept though."

For a moment Harry seemed doubtful, but in the end he decided to voice his mind. "Maybe you don't have to. Kingsley says there's a place for you at the Ministry, if that's what you want," he said, looking intently at her.

Hermione was surprised.

"It's a good offer. Whatever you decide, it'll be the best," Ginny said, apparently already aware of everything.

"He would have me? Without completing my studies?" Hermione asked, still unable to believe her ears.

Harry nodded with a wide smile. Meanwhile, Ginny laughed openly, "Kingsley let these prats skip their last year. You think he wouldn't offer the same to you?"

"You skipped last year?" Hermione asked Harry, who nodded. "And… Ron?"

For a moment, Hermione thought about her earlier conversation with Harry. She was growing more and more certain that whatever they were hiding from her, it had to do with Ron. She needed to find the way to get more direct answers out of them.

"Ron and I started the Auror training a few months after the Battle," Harry confirmed.

It did make sense. After all, they had more field experience than most trainees, and Ron would have been glad to skip exams. Apparently, things had started changing in a big way the moment she left.

Hermione pondered about her own situation. In normal circumstances, she would have taken Professor McGonagall's offer over Kingsley's without too much thought, however, things were different now. Hermione already felt as if she had lost plenty of time and was way behind her friends; going back to Hogwarts would only exacerbate the problem. Moreover, Ron would definitely look at her as a teenage girl if she were to put those robes on again. On the other hand, Hermione had been looking forward to NEWTs. There was much more that she could still learn, and having a real job frightened her to some degree.

"You don't have to decide now," Ginny said, noticing her distress. "I'm certain Kingsley can wait for you as long as McGonagall."

"Even longer, I daresay," Harry admitted, "McGonagall needs an answer before the start of the term. I got the feeling that Kingsley's offer didn't come with an expiration date."

"Thanks," Hermione said with an honest smile. Yes, it was troubling to face this changed world, but at least there was no Voldemort, and plenty of people were willing to help her.

"I wouldn't worry too much," Ginny assured her with a grin, "You may not know this yet, but the name Hermione Granger carries some serious weight these days. I wouldn't be surprised if Kingsley let you have your pick at any of the open positions. Maybe even open up a spot for you in whichever department you want to work in."

That didn't feel right. It wasn't as if Hermione was an accomplished witch or anything, she hadn't even finished Hogwarts. How could the Minister justify making such moves just to accommodate an inexperienced witch such as herself?

Nevertheless, that was something for another day. Right now, she had something else she needed to know, and didn't feel like waiting anymore. "So, that's why you get missions out of the country and such? You two are experienced Aurors now," she asked, faking a casual tone.

Harry was focused on his plate when he answered. "We have seen some stuff, yes. But most of the time it's way more boring than you could imagine. We don't get missions out of the Ministry's jurisdiction though."

She was getting somewhere, Hermione could feel it. She continued talking lazily, as if more interested in the peas on her plate, "Then Ron's trip…?"

Hermione didn't hear an answer, so she raised her eyes to Harry. He was staring at her carefully, while Ginny eyed him with suspicion.

"Not work related," he said at last, in a faint voice.

"Has he been skipping work then? Or did he take some days off?" Hermione asked.

There was again one of those silent conversations between Harry and Ginny. Through it, Harry seemed conflicted, while his wife frowned at him. "Ron is…"

"Harry…" Ginny warned him.

"I'm not going to lie to her. And, she's been anxious with all this, you've even said so."

Ginny gave him a look as she crossed her arms over her chest, "And what you're going to say is surely going to relax her."

There was a weird exchange of stares after which Hermione decided to intervene. "Please tell me," she said with a pleading look, "I can tell there's something important going on, and I want to know. I need to know. I wanted to wait for him, but I have been in the dark for days and who knows how many more days are left before I get to see him again? I can't stand this much longer."

A heavy defeated breath came out of Harry. He turned to Ginny with a silent question. The woman shrugged, as if telling him it was his choice.

"Ron isn't working, not presently. He's on sabbatical, you could say," Harry said at last.

Hermione raised an eyebrow, "Sabbatical? Why?"

"There was a problem at work. He was asked to take some time off."

He was asked to? That didn't feel right to Hermione. What could have possibly happened for them to ask Ron to stop working? She was worried sick going through the possibilities, but before she asked about that, a different question came to the forefront of her mind. "Then the trip?"

"Personal. To get his mind off of things."

"What— What happened to him?"

"It's a long story," Harry said.

"I want to hear it. Please," she said, though something told her that she wasn't going to like what she was about to hear.

With a heavy sigh, Harry rubbed the bridge of his nose. Then, he lifted his head and stared intently at Hermione for a moment before giving her an answer, "Ron loves you Hermione. Still now, after all this time."

Hermione choked back a gasp. It had been surprising for him to put that so abruptly. By all means, the words should have relaxed her, they were all that she had hoped for, wished for. However, Hermione noticed the tired and sad way in which Harry had said them, so she forced her heart to wait until she heard the whole story.

"You don't know how hard it was for him. When we thought you were dead."

Ginny looked at some random spot on the table as she continued Harry's story. "He didn't even talk, Hermione. For two whole weeks! Not one word. He barely ate. None of us knew how to help him."

Suddenly, Hermione's heart was turned over. The worry and sadness suddenly overcame her joy of being told that he still loved her. She felt awful and guilty. She should have been there for him, they had earned at least that much after everything they had gone through. She should have found a way to let him know that she was alright. It was irrational, but the feeling was there, digging a hole in her chest.

"It's not like that anymore," Harry hurried, noticing her reaction. "But it got very bad. The whole first year he was a shell of himself. Always angry. He didn't get better until the first anniversary, once he met Iz... Isabelle."

Isabelle.

Everything seemed distant for a moment, and the very room felt colder somehow. Hermione gave the slightest of gulps, "Is she… Ron's girlfriend?" Hermione asked without looking at them.

"I honestly don't know," said Harry after an excruciatingly long pause.

"You don't know?!" Hermione asked, her voice a tad higher than intended. She cleared her throat and spoke more composed, but her heart still felt as if it was looking for a way out of her chest. "Sorry, it's just… How can you not know?"

"They weren't together last time we saw them," said Ginny, looking away guiltily.

"But she could be now? How could that…?" her eyes popped open, as she became suddenly aware of something. "Merlin… they're together now, aren't they? This trip— It's just the two of them?"

The silence at the table was all she needed. Hermione stood at once, feeling as if she needed more air. The food on her plate was long forgotten.

"Oh… This is… and you have been keeping this from me?" her voice came out much weaker than she had intended.

"It's not what you're probably imagining, not quite," Harry said, gesturing for her to calm down.

This couldn't happen. Not now, not when she just got him. It had taken them years of senseless back and forths, but they had finally kissed and…

"I have to go. He needs to know that I'm back," she stated firmly.

"I already wrote to her, if you can just wait—"

"Her?" Hermione almost hissed, scandalized.

"Well we couldn't have written to Ron about it. He wouldn't have taken it nicely," Harry said, looking uneasy.

"Ha! There's an understatement," Ginny said, huffing.

"But—"

Harry leaned forward, "Hermione, please listen. Iz is a good friend. She's not your enemy. If she was… If she knew… That you were here— She would have brought Ron back at once. She knows how much he loves you."

At that, Ginny's hand landed on top of Harry's, as she nodded. "She lost someone too, you know. At the battle. They're just friends, and they have helped each other. You don't know how much."

It was difficult to think that Harry and Ginny would lie to her about this, but Hermione still couldn't bring herself to trust their words. Ron was on some kind of relaxing holiday with this woman. And they were alone.

"I still think you should've written to him," Hermione tried, but her voice sounded foreign to her.

"He would've ignored my letter," Harry said, giving Hermione a sad smile. "Trust me, he wouldn't have returned for anything short of someone in danger, and we wouldn't lie to him like that."

Hermione was confused, "I know Ron, he wouldn't just dismiss a letter from you. He isn't like that."

"Well, you're in for a surprise," Ginny said, frowning. "Ron is still the old Ron, but now he's other things as well."

"I… What do you mean?"

Ginny doubted how to answer a few times, and soon it was Harry's turn to give her a warning look. "What? Didn't you decide to start telling her things? What if she doesn't like Ron now? Wouldn't that make things worse?"

"I don't think we should be worrying about that now, Gin," Harry offered weakly.

None of this made any sense. Why wouldn't she like Ron? What had happened to him?

"I don't know what's going on with him, but I won't make this worse. I need to see him," Hermione pleaded.

"Once Iz answers, I promise you'll be the first one to know," Harry said.

"When would that be? How far away is he?" Hermione asked, but they weren't swift to answer. "Couldn't you just write again? Tell him—"

Ginny rolled her eyes, "What? If we just told him what precisely? 'Hey Ron, remember that girl you're madly in love with? Guess what? She didn't die after all.'? Yeah, he would call us all mental then storm into the nearest pub there. Good luck taking the firewhiskey away from him after that."

At that, Hermione's eyes sprung open. Harry frowned at Ginny, but he didn't look overly surprised at her words. Even Ginny seemed to realize she had said too much.

"He… drinks?" Hermione asked, still in shock.

"He's leaving it," Harry said sympathetically, then turned to his wife. "It wasn't the time for that. She's just returned."

A huge sigh escaped Ginny, "Sorry, I know this is difficult for you as well. I'm just worried. I know this could mean the world to him, but I'm also afraid of making things worse. If, well, you don't like him anymore. He was just recovering."

"I won't make things worse. And, yes, this is a lot to take in, but I still want to see him. Even more, actually. I want to know what happened, I want to help him."

They didn't answer, but gave her weak smiles.

Hermione needed to process all of this, it was too much. She was beside herself, the anxiety almost suffocating, and Ron… he was... hurting? Still? After five long years? How could that be? Even if he really loved her, as they said he did, shouldn't he have learned to cope one way or another by now?

They said he used to drink.

In a hurry she shook the thought away. She wouldn't pass judgements on this. Not now. Not when there was so much that she still didn't know. Not before they talked, once she went there and...

Hermione raised her eyes to her friends all of a sudden, who were patiently waiting for her to say something.

"There's something I still don't get," Hermione said. "If this Isabelle is only friends with Ron, if they don't feel anything about one another... Why do you think she could be his girlfriend now?"

Ginny raised her eyebrows at Harry.

"I…" Harry mumbled, shocked that Ginny had singled him out.

"What is it?" Hermione asked.

Harry scratched the back of his head, purposely looking away from Hermione, "Well, that might've been my doing."

"What did you do?"

"Ron has had a hard time, Hermione. I won't lie to you, he's had a girlfriend or two. All short-lived affairs that didn't last more than a few weeks."

There was nothing strange in Ron having a girlfriend these past years. Actually, it would have been illogical to think otherwise. However, it unsettled Hermione. She fidgeted a bit on her chair, impatiently. Trying to keep the images of what Ron might have been doing with those women out of her head.

Hermione pressed her lips together and nodded for Harry to continue.

"Well, err, that's the thing. It was all meaningless to him, and I don't think any of it really helped him all these years," Harry said.

"And…?" Hermione asked.

Taking a large breath, Harry looked away, obviously avoiding Hermione's eyes, "And, well, Iz's boyfriend moved out of the country months ago, and they broke up. So, before they left, I might have told Ron that he's known Iz for a while now. And that if he wanted to try something more meaningful with her, it might not be such a bad thing."

"And you waited two days to tell me all this!?" Hermione let out in a high tone, before rubbing her face, "Oh God…"

Hermione's thoughts were a mess. She was so lost, that she missed the angry look that Ginny was certainly throwing at Harry, though she heard his reaction.

"What? You did say it was a good idea then. How was I supposed to know this was going to happen?" Harry asked across the table, feeling miles away from Hermione.

Her education, her parents, a future job… it all lost urgency then. Ron was alive. He loved her, still. He was trying to move on though. In some far away vacation with this woman. Someone who was very close to him, apparently. And Harry had told him to go for it. And he didn't know she was alive. He could have started something with this Isabelle by now. They could be kissing at this very moment and…

"I'm going," Hermione said suddenly, interrupting them.

"What?" Both Harry and Ginny turned to her at once.

"I'm going to find Ron. Now. He needs to know," she started towards the fireplace frantically, though she realized just then that she didn't know where he was.

The sound of chairs being pushed back came, Harry and Ginny were both quickly standing up, "Wait, I already told you that—"

"You wrote, yes. And I refuse to sit here and wait for an answer. I'm going, with or without your help," Hermione said, her tone final.

She meant it. She knew she didn't know where he was, and had no money or way to travel internationally, but there was nothing in the world that could stop her now. She would nag each one of his brothers until she got an answer if she had to. And Ginny must have realized that, because she turned to Harry.

"Can't you talk to Kingsley? Arrange something for tomorrow?" she asked him.

"Do you think it's the right thing to do?"

"I honestly don't know, but it's what's going to happen," Ginny told him, after a quick glance at Hermione.

Harry sighed, heavily, "Alright. I'll take you there, but it'll have to be tomorrow. The Ministry is closed now," he said.

"But—"

"No buts. You might be Hermione Granger, but you have no way of reaching Ron any sooner than me. Get a good night's sleep, and I'll get us an international portkey first thing tomorrow."

Hermione thought of her options, and if she could find a way to reach Ron before tomorrow. She could find a way to get his location, but then she would have to arrange muggle transportation, and he was out of the country. What if she tried and took longer than what Harry was proposing?

"Fine," she said, "Tomorrow."

And with that, Hermione started preparing herself to see Ron again. Her heart was beating hard against the inside of her chest, and she couldn't help but go through all the possible outcomes of this trip. She had to believe they would get there in time, and that Ron would still be willing to have her in his life, hopefully as more than friends. Hermione had the intentions of helping him with whatever problems he had at the moment. They could get through it, together.

Nevertheless, even with all of her planning, Hermione was conscious that things were far from settled. There were many things that could turn out differently than how she wanted them to be, and that made her anxious. After all, in a situation like this, the only thing certain was that Harry was wrong. Because there was just no way that Hermione could get a good night's sleep now.

Next Chapter: Café Abringer