It was hard. Arthur wouldn't let Merlin out of his sight for the longest time. Even when doing his chores, shining armour, grinding herbs, washing clothes, things that Arthur would normally ignore or scoff at, Merlin was under almost constant scrutiny.

Normally, Merlin would love it. It would give him a chance to bond with Arthur, mock him when he was being ridiculous, laugh with him at the antics of the puppies in the stables or talk about duties or joys or when they could go and swim in the lake.

But it was also impossible to get away and find the sorceress who had hurt Merlin for so long. Who would hurt Arthur if he didn't bend to her will. Not that Merlin didn't want magic made legal but that wasn't her call.

It was a bit confusing. Merlin did understand. It had been too long that those with magic had to hide. Hell, Merlin had to hide every single damn day and he was properly sick of it. But he couldn't let her hurt Arthur, no matter what Merlin felt or thought or knew.

Finally, when Arthur was busy with training and Uther wasn't breathing down Merlin's neck—because obviously it was highly suspicious that Merlin went blind and then not and Uther kept harping about magic and staring at Merlin as if it were his fault, Merlin told Arthur that he'd be collecting herbs for Gaius.

Arthur shoved his sword back into its scabbard and began packing up, as if he were planning on coming with Merlin. Merlin looked at him with growing nervousness. "It's just over the next hill. It's not like she'll be lurking this close to Camelot. Stop hovering like a demented hen. I'm not some half-witted chick, you know. I'll be fine."

"I'm not hovering," Arthur said, glowering at Merlin. "And I believe that the entirety of the population of Camelot agrees that you are a half-wit, chick or otherwise."

Merlin let out a long put-upon sigh. Sometimes Arthur was ridiculous. "I'll be fine. My eyesight is fine. My satchel will be fine. Even the herbs will be fine, well except for the roots and me cutting them up and…"

"You do talk utter nonsense." Arthur shook his head, rolling his eyes a bit. "Fine, if you think you can fend off a wicked sorceress all on your own, don't let me stop you. But…." Arthur wagged his finger at Merlin's face, close enough to touch if Merlin moved half an inch. "If you go blind again, I swear I'm not going to buy her another bolt of silk."

Merlin grinned. "Thanks, Arthur." And then he ran as fast as he could just to make sure Arthur wasn't going to change his mind.

The Darkling Woods was well-named. Dark, woods, easy to get lost in—not that Merlin was lost but then he wasn't exactly sure where he was. Still, if the sorceress were anywhere, it would be there.

"I don't live in a hovel in the woods, Emrys." The woman appeared out of nowhere. Merlin should learn to do that but right now, that wasn't high on his list. "After all, magic is magical. It can conjure up a snug cottage or a palace or even a hut, if needs be."

"You tried to blind Arthur. You nearly succeeded," Merlin said, scowling at her. He wasn't about to be diverted with comparing magic spells, although she was right. He should get on that, too, at least conjuring up a softer bed. His was hard as a rock. "Arthur is not to be trifled with."

"And are you?" She gave a little laugh, waving off his frown. "I did exactly what I planned on doing, blinding you."

"What?" Merlin was shocked. That didn't make sense.

"I had to know what was in his heart. It is one thing to talk with you and others about how wonderful he is and how understanding and kind. A prince among men. But when push comes to shove, how far would he be willing to go, especially for a servant? Would he put his father's ravings above your well-being? Or anyone's?" She shrugged. "And now we know."

Merlin's mind was reeling. All of this had been a test of Arthur's heart. "You could have just asked me," he yelled, his fists coming up and waving in the air. He was not happy. "He's offered his life for mine a dozen times. What more do you want?"

"Those were in the moment. Where he didn't have to think or go against his father in any way that was important. Saving your life in the heat of battle is one thing. This, he had to think carefully about and make his move deliberately." Her eyes gleamed sharp rebuke. "He had to talk to a known sorcerer, not one who hides his abilities behind smiles and lies and hand-waving. He had to reach out to the magical community. Unlike you."

"Great," Merlin said, sarcasm and frustration in his voice. "So, now he'll think sorcery is even more of an evil than he did before. Did you ever think that maybe you could show him good things? You know, like flowers or fireworks or…."

"As could you. Emrys, as could you. What are you waiting for?" Her reply was sharp, her scowl all-knowing, as if she could see into his heart and found him wanting.

"He'll… I save him lots of times," Merlin half-yelled at her, annoyed with the question and the answer, too. "He wouldn't be alive if I didn't use magic."

"But he doesn't know that, does he?" she said, her voice softening into pity. "You could show him the joys of magic and instead you hide behind lies, cowering in the darkness. If anyone, it should be you teaching him about how magic shapes the world, how it's in everything, how it can bring joy in healing and crops and love. You, Emrys, the greatest of us."

She was right. He should have done more, so much more and he'd left it too long, and now he can never tell Arthur the truth no matter how much he wanted to.

"He wouldn't understand," Merlin said, his heart breaking at the thought. "I have to save him, and I can't do that if he knows that I have magic."

"And don't you think that should be my choice?" Arthur's voice rang out as he stepped beyond the moss-covered rocks and into the clearing.

Merlin just about fainted, swaying in the realisation that Arthur might have heard more than a little. He didn't know what to say, instead gulping back excuses, Merlin stammered, "Ar… Arthur… you… followed me?"

"Astute as ever," Arthur snapped back. It should have been the beginning of a back-and-forth between them, insults and banter and smiles. But Arthur wasn't smiling now. "You lied to me."

Merlin thought about lying again. It came so easily after all this time but instead, he swallowed it back down, and said, "Yes, many times. I didn't want you to know that I had…." He couldn't say it, even now.

"Magic," Arthur spat out, looking as furious as Merlin had ever seen him. "And the rest? Playing the fool? Pretending to be my friend?"

"I am your friend, damn it. The rest wasn't a lie. The rest was…. Arthur, it was so damn hard not to tell you. I wanted to, so many times." Merlin stood there wringing his hands, trying not to cry.

"I defied my father for you, and this is the thanks I get. To find out it was all a lie, that it wasn't even…," Arthur stopped, glaring at Merlin.

Merlin yelled a little. Arthur was such a cabbage-head. "It wasn't a lie. I really couldn't see. I thought I'd be blind forever and it just about killed me that I couldn't be there for you, but… what the hell was I supposed to do? Even now, you have your hand on your sword, ready to cut off my head." Merlin waved his hand toward Arthur, glancing down at the sword gleaming at Arthur's waist and Arthur's fingers on its hilt.

"And why shouldn't I? After all, you have magic. You lied to me, manipulated me, made me think that we…." Arthur's face shuttered close. "Just to make me look a fool."

Ordinarily, Merlin would insult him, and Arthur would insult him back, but now was not the time for it. Instead, Merlin said, "I never wanted anything but to be your friend and keep you safe. I'm the fool here, thinking that you'd understand."

"What's to understand when you keep secrets? How can I make decisions when I don't know what's going on? How can you not understand this?" Arthur was getting louder and louder.

Merlin matched him, his voice echoing off the rocks. "How can you not know how terrified I am, all the damn time? Waiting for the knife or the pyre or the satisfied look on your face when they cut off my head?"

"How can you think that?" Arthur yelled, his face flushed.

"Arthur, you and your father have killed so many people since I've been in Camelot. Some with magic, some without. Children, old people, some screaming for pity, others resigned as they died. And I had to watch and try not to vomit at the sight. Or tremble, waiting for the guards. Hell, you threw me in prison a few times and I wasn't sure you'd ever come back and get me out. What makes you think I'd just laugh it off? What makes you think that I don't have nightmares about it?" Merlin stared at him, daring him to disagree.

That seemed to pull Arthur up short. "I would never let you die."

Merlin deflated then, pulling himself in and settling down on a rock. His legs were wobbly from everything. His voice small, he said, "How was I supposed to know that when you kill sorcerers and think nothing of it?"

Arthur grimaced, then settled down next to Merlin. "I do think about it. All the damn time."

Merlin looked down at his hands. "Well, then we both keep secrets. Because I never knew that. To me, you were the perfect son, following his father's orders. Was that a lie?" He looked up then, gazing at Arthur, challenging him.

Arthur shook his head, then stared off into the distance. "No, yes… I don't know."

Neither of them said anything for a few moments. The sorceress had long gone, apparently her work done and Merlin's life turned upside down. He never did learn her name.

Finally, unable to keep his deepest fear hidden, Merlin said, "Are you going to kill me?"

Turning to Merlin, looking both dismayed and resigned, Arthur said, "No, but I can't let you go, either. You know too much about Camelot."

Merlin nodded. It was to be expected. "So, I'm a prisoner, then."

"Merlin, I… you break the law every time you use magic. What am I supposed to do?" Arthur looked down at his hands, sighing a little.

"You could ignore it. I could show you just how beautiful it can be. And it's useful, too. For healing, for doing chores, for… fighting off bandits and your enemies." Merlin gave Arthur a little hopeful smile, but Arthur just shook his head.

"It's too dangerous."

"Yeah. It's not like I haven't been in danger since the day I arrived," Merlin said, giving Arthur a sour look.

"You could have left at any time," Arthur pointed out.

"And left you to die? Not likely." Merlin stared at him. He couldn't believe that Arthur was really that thick. "You attract trouble just by breathing."

Indignant, Arthur said, "I can take care of myself."

"Arthur, you want me to tell you the truth, right?" As Arthur scowled at him, Merlin said, "I've lost count of how many times I've saved your life. Haven't you ever wondered about just how lucky you've been? Falling branches and surviving attacks no one else would have? You wouldn't last the week if I'm not there to help."

"And that is supposed to make me feel better?" Arthur said, standing up.

Merlin looked up at him, waiting. When Arthur just stared at him, clearly deciding what to do next, Merlin said, "Sire… Arthur, I believe that you will be a great king. I've always believed in you, well, after that first awful week. Then you were a prat and a royal one." He stood up, then, reaching out, then thinking better of it. Arthur was still wary. Merlin could see it in his eyes. "Please, let me remain with you, as servant, as prisoner, as gadfly, just let me keep you safe."

But he could also see Arthur wavering.

"Why should you want to keep an enemy of magic safe?" Arthur said, not quite frowning, more puzzled than anything.

With everything in him, Merlin said, "Because, above all, you are my friend, and if I have to give my life to someone, I want it to be you."

Arthur must have seen the sincerity in Merlin's face, the way he leaned forward, to connect with him somehow. Nodding, Arthur wagged a finger toward Merlin as if to be stern and imperious. Flat, he said, "I'll be watching. One step out of line, one indication that you are going to harm Camelot, I'll run you through myself."

Merlin waited a moment, watching to see if Arthur would grab onto his sword as if to emphasise his decision. But he just stood there, waiting, almost a flash of yearning in his eyes.

And as Merlin stepped closer, Arthur didn't harden as if an enemy was before him. A good sign.

Trying to see just what his boundaries were in this new reality, Merlin said, "Can I still call you prat?"

"Sire, my lord, your royal highness, your glorious majesty, illustrious master, my perfect prince, yes. You'll notice that prat isn't on the list." Arthur raised one eyebrow in challenge.

Merlin grinned then, letting out the breath he hadn't noticed he was holding. "Neither is clotpole but I'll be calling you that, too."

"Idiot."

"Cabbage-head."

"Merlin…," Arthur said, rolling his eyes. "You can't call me that."

Merlin ignored the rebuke. He had called Arthur worse and would again, he hoped. Reaching over, touching Arthur's arm a moment to reconnect, he stepped back. "I promise you, Arthur, that you won't regret it." When Arthur nodded finally, Merlin, with all eagerness in his voice, said, "So can I show you how I conjure butterflies? Blue? I like blue. They are the colour of the sky and your eyes, too."

"God, Merlin, you are such a girl." Arthur didn't sound horrified at the thought, more intrigued although there was fear there, too. "Besides, magic is still illegal in Camelot."

Merlin brushed that aside. "I know. So, butterflies or maybe a spark dragon? I'm really good at those. Or the Pendragon crest?"

"Merlin, you can't…." Arthur started to say.

"Arthur, let me show you how beautiful it can be. Please."

Merlin's universe brightened when Arthur nodded. In a way, Merlin knew there would be ups and downs when they got back to the castle, accusations and silent nights and anger. There had to be. Arthur was still the prince and Merlin was magic, like it or not. But there would be love, too, sharing and joy and the knowledge of a golden future for them both.

If Arthur grinned as the blue butterflies settled on his arm and gazed in wonder at the golden crest hovering there, it was all to the good. Pure joy to watch his face lit up.

Perhaps that sorceress had done them both a favour.

Because blindness comes in many forms.

And now, finally, both of them could see.