The next few nights Mikasa lay cuddled deep into Eren's chest while he slept. Even though she refused to open her eyes and see what horror had befallen him after any particular dream, her ears took in the steady, strong beating of his heart, hands feeling each rise and fall of his lungs. This made the days just a little bit easier.

That and the fact everyone finally had time to meet up. It was days like these she treasured most. Being able to spend time with her friends, her loved ones, was rare with their conflicting schedules. Was she annoyed when they didn't let her help to set up the picnic. Absolutely, but it was the trade for not being carried up the grassy hill they settled on.

She watched as Sasha tried to steal the other half of Connie's sandwich and he was having none of it, both holding her back with a foot pressed to her chest and uselessly throwing blades of grass at her face as he shoved food in his mouth, chewing as quickly as he could.

"Mikasa."

Her head snapped to Armin on her right.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. Can you pass me the plate of sausages? I need to get some while she's distracted."

"Uh, yeah," she muttered, quickly doing as he'd asked, but unable to draw her attention from him.

"You're staring, Mik. Do I have something on me?" He looked down at himself, brushing invisible dirt from his shirt then face.

"Is everything alright, Armin," she asked tentatively to which he returned a puzzled look.

"Yes, why? What's wrong?" What was wrong? He looked haggard, worse for wear, hollow eyed. So did the other two, as a matter of fact, Sasha being the worst of all. When she mentioned this to him, he simply laughed it off. "We're fine. It was just a challenge we did with the new recruits. They're some tough kids. Eren didn't tell you about it?" She shook her head in the negative, but as she looked back at Sasha who was now dancing around in triumph, she froze. Her hair and skin was falling off, revealing her bones in the most horrifying way and –

"Are you alright," he returned the question placing a worried hand on her shoulder. He looked better this time and she glanced back over to her other two guests who seemed perfectly fine, skin intact, not nearly as lifeless.

"I'm trying to be," she said dropping her head into shaking hands, her palms quietly digging into her tired eyes. No, not them too.

"What's going on," Connie asked, he and Sasha looking across at her and Armin.

"Nothing, I just…"

"Eren says you still haven't been sleeping well," the blonde said. All she could do was sigh.

"Is that why you're looking so tired? Jean said your hair didn't look as shiny as it normally did – We were all thinking it, don't be offended – I guess it's a good thing we didn't let you carry anything up," Sasha rapid fired, coming to sit on her other side eyeing the plate of cookies she was guarding.

"I'm not handicapped! I can still do things. I'm probably still the strongest out of all of you," Mikasa complained.

"Keyword: probably."

"Would you like to put that to the test, Connie?" Her saccharine tone made the man in question freeze.

"You know, you used to do this whole death glare thing when threatening people. I'm not sure which is scarier." He held up his hands in defense.

"We're not saying that. Just that it's good if you take it easy. At least until you have the baby," Armin soothed.

"All I do is take it easy. Look, long story short, we spoke to the doctor who essentially said I had some lingering anxiety and that it would probably pass once the baby was born."

"Well that doesn't sound very helpful," Sasha frowned.

"Then we're all on the same page," Mikasa laughed.

"How did he say the baby was? This was your last check up before the big day, right?" She nodded, looking to her right.

"The baby is healthy and has a very strong heartbeat. I wish she was awake right now so you guys could feel her move."

"She?" Armin smirked.

"Oh, hush. Anyway, she doesn't move around too much so at least my insides aren't always churning around."

"Well that must mean she definitely takes after you. We all know her father can't sit still to save his life." Mikasa turned to see Eren and Jean, trudging up the hill, each carrying a quarter barrel of cider in their arms.

"Shut up, horse face," was her husband's good-natured reply.

"I mean, he's not wrong," Armin chimed, causing him to receive a playful scowl.

"This is why we aren't friends."

"My heart is broken."

"I know it is," he replied matter-o-factly, sitting his jug down on the blanket and taking his place next to her.

"Stop your flirting and pour the drinks! You guys took forever," Connie demanded waving his cup around.

"Maybe if someone hadn't let the first set roll into the lake," Jean said pointedly, his glare zeroing in on Sasha.

"What," she whined, "I was distracted. Mikasa shouldn't have said she baked cookies at that specific moment."

"No, what she said was, she wished Hange and Levi-Heichou could have made it, so she could bake oatmeal raisin ones, since she knows he hates them, but I'm just glad there are some left."

"I distracted her with my sandwich."

"You did that on purpose?"

And there they went again, this time, chasing each other around. Mikasa leaned into Eren's side, her eyes fluttering closed, a smile on her lips. Even though it was more than they got during the war, they still didn't have much time to spend together like this, just laughing and relaxing. As twilight approached, they all chipped in helping pack up. Well she was sidelined again, but she didn't really mind. For old time's sake, they watched the golds and pinks of the horizon shift to reds and purples to blues and blacks.

They parted that evening with hugs and promises of everyone getting together again at Historia's farm the week before the Marley delegation came. Maybe their babes could play together in the future, Mikasa mused on the way home.

Eren and Armin left the next day to do a survival training. It would be for one night, but Eren was paranoid making sure she would have everything she could possibly need. Telling her of all the people she could go to if she needed help or the quickest way to reach him as if she didn't already know. She was shoving him out the door, with a headache on the horizon, but it didn't stop her from immediately missing him as silly as that was or expecting him back home that evening.

Crickets sounded off outside the window as she laid in bed that night, and it was like all her fears come true. Alone, in the dark, and without him. Before long, Mikasa was hauling herself up from the mattress. She'd tell Eren she tried to sleep. In the meantime, baking would take up the night.

Waddling into the kitchen, she set to work measuring and pouring ingredients for her apple tart. She couldn't wait to sit it in front of Sasha and deny her until the food fanatic's big crocodile tears streamed down her face and mixed disgustingly with the trails of drool from her mouth. Just the thought brought a smile to her weary expression. Once her dough was prepared, she started slicing apples. It was a mindless task that kept her hands busy and her mind empty. She wished she'd been paying attention.

It was quick, the shift in the air letting her know she wasn't alone. A nearly silent footstep told her that someone was close behind her, a wrong footstep. Mikasa had been pregnant for almost nine months, out of her service for even longer, but she still had better reflexes than anyone and she'd be damned if someone got the jump on her. Flipping the knife around, she turned over her shoulder and flung it towards the intruder at lightning speed.

A hand came up to block the hurtling weapon, providing some protection from its blade, but not from its force. The knife hit its target, easily cleaving through skin and bone of the hand, and sinking into their chest, causing her assailant to hit the ground.

"Shit, Mikasa! Fuck!"

Eren lay on the ground, his palm stuck awkwardly to his chest by the knife, red pooling into the fibers of his shirt, spreading as if it thought it looked better outside his body and was attempting its best to make it so. Stumbling over to him on wobbly legs, she fell to her knees beside his prone form.

"Eren…oh no, no…," she heard her mouth say, voice getting higher with each no, hands fluttering over him doing nothing to help. She had done this. She had done this and there was no taking it back. Why wasn't she pulling the knife out? "Eren," she whispered tears streaming down her face, dotting her protruding stomach. She had done this.

"Snap out of it, Mikasa!" She blinked, wet eyelashes leaving tiny trails on her cheeks. He was sitting up in front of her, the bloody knife in one hand, steam floating from his chest and the other. "Are you alright, Miki?

"I – I thought you were dead. You stopped moving."

"If this thing had been any longer, I just might be, and I'm pretty sure the rather spectacular stream of expletives that left my mouth didn't stop," he chuckled.

"How can you laugh at this? I hurt you! I almost killed you," she exclaimed, waterworks still in full effect.

"Well, I twisted my ankle on the last step before our landing because the light went out. In my attempt to sneak in quietly, not wanting to wake my exhausted, pregnant wife, I find that she is awake and baking, of all things in the middle of the night. Then, I have the brilliant idea to sneak up on her as punishment for being out of bed, because I've somehow forgotten that she can break every bone in my body with just her index finger. And I've suffered the deserved consequences.

"That sounds pretty comical to me. Besides, who else's expectant wife can be slicing apples one minute, then dropping a grown man seconds later? Only mine," he smiled and Mikasa was puzzled like she'd never been before. There was no way what she saw wasn't real because she hadn't been asleep, there was no overlap of two versions of him. Eren had been bleeding out on the floor, yet here he was perfectly well, healing as if no harm had come to him like he normally did. Of course he healed. Why did she think otherwise?

"I guess, I'm just tired. My brain must be making stuff up again. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to – to hurt you." She dissolved into further tears hiding her face in her hands. The exhaustion and tiredness she felt at this point was just damn overwhelming.

"Shit, Miki, please don't cry anymore. Look, I'm fine, perfectly fine and healed. I've been injured plenty of times before. This is hardly the worst of them. Let's get up. C'mon." Eren helped her stand and led her to one of the chairs, so she could sit before wiping his rough, calloused hands over her reddened face, waiting as she got ahold of herself.

"Do you want something to drink," he asked suddenly to which Mikasa shook her head knowing he wanted to give her something warm again like the doctor recommended.

"It might help." Eren obviously wasn't planning on taking 'no' for an answer, and she didn't have the will to argue.

"Fine." Nodding, he stood and got to work. Folding her arms, she closed her eyes and laid her head down, listening to his soothing timber as he explained the bad case of food poisoning that postponed the training. She didn't mind at all even though it meant they would be doing this separation thing again soon.

"What do you dream about," he asked quite out of the blue after placing a steaming cup of cider down and taking a seat across from her.

I don't know," she mumbled without thought as she sat up and let the warm wisps of steam soothe her puffy face. "I can't always remember." They held each other's gaze for a long moment before Mikasa went to take a sip, but Eren stopped her, his gaze piercing in a way that it rarely was. Her hand tightened around the cup as unease settled in.

"What can you remember?"

"Why?"

"Because maybe it can help us figure out what the problem is, pinpoint exactly where the anxiety is stemming from and, I don't know, settle it like the doctor said. It's…we don't exactly have any other options right now." Another long moment. She looked down at his tanned hand covering the rim of her cup.

"So many of our plans and operations hung on by the thinnest of threads, and we were saved by the splitting of hairs. How did we manage to stay alive when so many others didn't? I just...it seems to plague me all the ways that things could have gone so much worse."

"Seems to?"

"I always used to be so afraid of having to be without you. If something had happened differently, would I be here without you? You were – are – my family. Eventually the feeling faded. It's still there, but not nearly as prominent. It's not this near crippling need to always be near you in case something goes wrong. The spaces inside that held those worries have been filled by you and all of this. Now I can just be with you," she said softly glancing around the room.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It's just what if's. Really bad what if's." Eren watched her again. For what, she couldn't tell, but that unnerving look was still on his face. "What?" He hesitated before retracting his hand from her cup.

"Nothing…nothing."

It was true. She wasn't afraid, Mikasa knew she wasn't, yet it was the main star of her dreams as if trying to test that belief, prove her wrong. Him getting killed by the slavers who took her, getting crushed by that boulder that kept them from saving Aunt Carla, starving or freezing to death when they were homeless and huddled together in harsh winters, a freak accident during training, being chewed up by the titan he saved Armin from, being taken by Annie, Reiner and Bertholdt, Kenny, eaten by Historia. It was endless the ways he died, the ways the others lost their lives, the ways she died.

Mikasa didn't know why she had to see it so much, but it was breaking her a little more day by day. It was a terrifying thought, but she wondered if she would get to a point where this wasn't enough anymore. Where this home and Eren and their little one wouldn't console her anymore. She was scared.

Their quiet conversation continued until she finished her drink. He wouldn't be satisfied otherwise. He reached for the empty cup, but she pulled it just out of his grasp.

"I got it," she said standing only to stagger on unsteady feet. "Woah." She gripped the top of the chair to steady herself. Something was wrong. The room was beginning to wobble. Her balance was way off. "I don't…I don't feel well."

"Sit back down, Mikasa," Eren said calmly. Too calmly. When her eyes met his, she knew. The cup slipped from her hand, numerous tiny white pieces creating a speckled pattern on their dark wood floor.

"You didn't." The chair she'd just occupied caught all of her weight when her legs suddenly decided to no longer support her. Was her speech slurring?

"It's just an herb, different from a full sleep aid. It takes a little longer to take effect and you have to be very careful with the preparation, but it shouldn't be harmful." He came to stand by her, steadying her swaying form.

"You drugged me." She weakly tried pushing him away to no avail. Her limbs had never failed her in this way before. Fire mounted in her chest as her head became hazier. How could he?

"I'm sorry. I had to. This is getting out of control, and I can't stand by and do nothing. I asked the doctor for something," when she'd gone to the restroom then, "and this is what he recommended. He wasn't even sure if it would work well, but it seems to be taking," Eren explained. "It's okay and you need to breathe Mikasa." She opened her mouth taking in large gulps of air, but it wasn't enough. Was she hyper ventilating?

"I can't go to sleep," was all she managed to coherently say.

"This will help you sleep," he tried to reassure her. "I'll be right here when you wake up." Will you, Mikasa wanted to ask. You don't understand, she wanted to say. But you won't, she wanted to cry, but she was helpless as her own body shut down, giving up on her, falling prey to the fatigue she'd been fighting for so long. Everything was so heavy, her limbs, her tongue, her eyelids. Eren became less and less clear, her vision blurring and then going dark. "I'll be right here, as long as you want. Now and forever."

Goodbye, Eren.

Thank you, Eren.

Stop, Eren!

See you later, Eren.

I'm sorry, Eren.

I love you, Eren.

Come back, Eren

Why, Eren?

Eren, you're my dearest and most beloved.

She snapped into a sitting position, the immediate sensation of vertigo causing her to whip out of bed in an attempt to quickly find some place to spill the contents of her stomach; but her feet were twisted in the blankets and she fell to the floor, catching her weight on her hands and knees. Her nails dug into the woven rug as she tried futilely to stop the convulsions of her body, the excess of tangy saliva in her mouth, the burning in the back of her throat. As her lips unsealed without permission, a small trash can slid underneath her just in time to catch the spew. Praying it would stop soon, she continued dry heaving despite the lack of contents.

A cool towel was pressed against her face, wiping away anything leftover and guided her backward to lean against the bed and catch her breath.

"How are you feeling?" She registered the bright sunlight filtering, a stark contrast to the murky film hanging in her mind. "Mikasa?" His movement caught her eyes, dark green boring into her, lifeless green, a dead green that had given up.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save you, Eren. I'm sorry you had to go," she whispered brokenly. His freezing hands cupped her face.

"You've saved me so many times. I'm right here. I haven't gone anywhere. I've been right here with you this entire time."

"But you weren't."

"But I was – I am. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be right here." He whispered it again, forehead pressing against hers, noses sliding against one another's. And again. And again. And again. Breathing as one, she slowly believed him. The lines on his face slowly disappeared, once hollowed cheeks filling in, the green of his eyes finding the life they looked so beautiful with. Eventually Mikasa recognized they were in their bedroom in their home in Shiganshina, New Shiganshina.

"How long have I been asleep?"

"Two days."

"Two days! How did I –

She stopped remembering the heaviness of her body, how she couldn't fight as unconsciousness took hold, how he had put something in her drink. "Don't touch me," Mikasa whispered harshly and Eren pulled back as if he'd been burned.

"I had to."

"Did you?" She pushed herself up to her feet, biting back a groan at the sharp pain in her lower back. There was an ache she hadn't noticed.

"Yeah. I did. What else could I have done." He followed closely behind her as she trudged down the hall, muscle struggling under the stiffness of two days without their usual activity.

"I don't know. Maybe not drug me! Maybe ask for my opinion or permission! Anything other than slipping a fucking sedative into my drink!" Her frostiness was punctuated by slamming the bathroom door in his face. With something solid in between them, Mikasa felt her anger quickly fizzling out. Her head fell to the hard surface with a soft thud. She didn't know how to feel about this, what to do. How could this have happened? What would push him to do this? The telltale pinpricks behind her eyes made her step away with a huff and turn to face the mirror, determined not to be overcome with emotions; but as she took in her sullen appearance and ran a shaky hand through her greasy hair, all she could feel was hurt. Just hurt that he'd do this, betray her trust this way, whether he thought it was for the best or not.

Swiping a few errant tears away, she began to run some water. Lying in the same position for so long had really put a strain on her back if the little sharp pains were any indication, but she pushed through them as she did any other pain to clean herself up. They would fade in a little bit. As Mikasa worked, she was constantly listening to see if he'd left yet, but he remained outside the door probably leaning against the wall in wait. She sighed, knowing she would forgive him. She always did, but it wouldn't be easy for him. He needed to understand first, to know.

Gritting her teeth at the increasing ache in her back, she stalked out of the bathroom. Water dripped from her skin onto Eren's feet as she passed him, towel completely forgotten in her rush to put space in between them. It was silent as she dried, dressed, and ran a brush through dark strands, but she could hear his impatience in the shifting of his feet. She gasped, hand settling on top of her belly where the baby gave a particularly hard kick.

"What?" Eren reached out to her, but she dodged his concerned hand and moved out the door, absently noting that Carla had completely shifted positions. The little flutters and movements let Mikasa know that the baby was fine, and only she felt terrible. It was a comfort.

"How long are we going to do this," he asked as she opened their little icebox in search of something to warm up.

"Until I feel like not doing it." And if she saw he cooked her favorite meal for her she would ignore it and have a sandwich instead.

"Look, I know you're angry, Miki."

"I'm not angry, not anymore."

"It doesn't seem that way to me."

"I didn't say I wasn't upset." She paused her cheese slicing, eyes squeezing shut at the pain, tingles in her pelvis now. Mikasa was no stranger to pain, but she doesn't remember feeling any like this. Was she having a bad reaction to whatever he'd given her? Shouldn't it be out of her system by now?

"Mikasa?"

"What," she snapped harsher than she meant to.

"Are you okay." It was then that she noticed how tense her muscles were.

"I'm fine," she said trying to relax herself. A heavy hand came to rest on her shoulder.

"You don't look fine."

"And if I'm not?" She slammed the knife on the counter and whirled around, their faces inches apart. "Are you going to drug me again?" His eyes narrowed.

"That's not fair."

"Isn't it?"

"I did it for a good reason. Was I supposed to just let you waste away? You're not invincible and you're carrying our kid. Do you know how many women die in labor? How many babies don't make it? I couldn't – can't – lose you, either of you!"

"How many times do we have to say that we're in this together. You were the same one just digging into me for not telling you something was going on. And you were right, so now you do this without saying anything! How am I supposed to feel? Should I be grateful because you're supposedly doing this for my good even though you took away my freedom to have a choice, to have a say in me and our child. I'm not so irresponsible that I would endanger the life of our child, but you acted as if I would - as if I am. You put me in a corner and decided your say mattered more than mine or the both of ours together."

"I'm not saying you'd endanger Carla, at least not intentionally. Given that we both care about the baby and your health, it didn't seem like the wrong choice to me or one that you would disagree with if it was beneficial to all of us."

"You can't know if you didn't ask! I have nearly lost my mind after losing you so many times, but you don't see me forbidding you from leaving the house, keeping you here against your will, taking your choices away from you even if we both care about you and your health."

"There it is. You said it again," he stepped closer to her, eyes narrowed. "You keep saying that you don't want to lose me again, that you've lost me before, no matter how many times I say I'm not going anywhere, that I've never gone anywhere. Why do you keep saying that? Where is it that I'm going that makes you scared I'll never come back? No. No, it's more than that.

And you're not saying it in a way that has you worried, paranoid like before. It's the only reason why I believed you when you told me it doesn't bother you anymore. No, this – you're treating it like it's actually happened, like you really believe it's happened or will happen again, like – like I've died or something." Eren looked at her expectantly and she stared back, the next words from his mouth making her heart drop into her already churning stomach. "Your dreams...all those what-ifs...They were me dying, weren't they? That's what you mean by losing me, isn't it?

Of course, he would bring it up now, choose to put the pieces together now. It was all so much, the hurt of his decision, the unusual pain she was experiencing growing more intense by the minute, and now having to admit everything to him because she slipped up again causing him to figure it all out. Fingers twisting in her scarf, Mikasa opened and closed her mouth but nothing came out. Why couldn't she say anything even though he already asked the right questions? A simple 'yes' would be enough to answer him, but the words were lodged in her throat, refusing to move out, leave an acrid taste on her tongue in their wake, and twist into the air for him to hear.

The moment was strange when her voice finally came back to her as she felt a quick popping sensation from inside. She clenched automatically in an attempt to stop it, but that was clearly in vain as a sudden stream was trickling down her legs pooling onto the floor.

"Oh..." The silence stretched long as they both just watched it happen

"Is that – did you...Your waters broke."

"It does seem that way, yes. I think...I might be in – mmgh!" A tight squeezing in her pelvis brought all words to her halt, her teeth gritting together at sudden cramping. "No," she huffed when it passed long enough to regain her breath. "I'm definitely in labor, but it's too early. Something must be wrong. She still has another week to go."

"Healthy labor can occur anywhere from two weeks earlier than the estimated due date to two weeks later." She blinked at him.

"How do you know that?"

"Did you read any of the books Armin gave us?"

"You had time to read the books Armin gave us?" She shook her head, one hand massaging her back, the other at her swollen stomach. "That's not important right now. I'm in labor and our baby needs to be delivered. Do you remember the midwife the doctor introduced us to?"

"Yes, but I can't leave you here alone. What if something happens?"

"One of us has to go and it can't be me. You're not about to deliver this baby, so you have to go."

"Mikasa –

"Armin isn't far. It's still early enough that he hasn't left yet, right? Send him over and go!" She propelled him towards the door, all thoughts of the previous discussion momentarily gone. "Hurry, Eren." They're baby was coming. They would soon be parents for real.

"Y – yeah. Okay, I'll be back soon." He pressed a quick kiss to the side of her head and bolted out the door, grabbing his boots as he went. It wasn't long, but by the time their blonde friend came hustling through the door, she had already set their largest pot to boiling water on the stove and set some towels aside.

"Mikasa! Are you okay? Are you in any pain at all? How far apart are your contractions? Do you need me to do anything?"

"Everything is fine, Ar. Yes, I'm in a bit of pain, but nothing unbearable. I just had another before you came, So, I'll say about 12 minutes or so, but we'll have to wait a little longer to be sure." That seemed to calm him, and he hovered over her as she went about preparing for the midwife's arrival, trying to convince her to sit down. She couldn't though. Her nerves would get the better of her if she did. Was she ready? Of course, she'd always wanted children, but that was different from actually having one. It had been so long since she'd had a mother, so would she even be a good one? Mikasa wouldn't normally think a week could make that much a difference in feeling ready to have a baby, but it was all feeling so sudden.

She hissed sharply, nearly dropping the tub of water she was moving to the bedroom if not for Armin when a particularly strong contraction took her breath away.

"We're at 8 minutes apart, maybe you should lie down, now." Mikasa continued to resist until one had her doubled over, hands resting on her knees to stay upright. They were getting longer and more painful and she was so thankful when Eren finally came back. She had been thrown across roofs, had her ribs broken, been shot at, and been through the most grueling conditions, but nothing could have prepared her for the pain that labor would bring.

She was in throws of another contraction when two women, one older and one younger, came back into their bedroom, Eren in tow behind them.

"Good," she nodded approvingly at the tub of water and towels. "You've prepared. I am Maria as you may remember. Elena will be helping deliver your little one. How are you, Mikasa?"

"Wishing everyone would stop asking me that at this point," she breathed making the women laugh. There was nothing she found funny about that, but Eren had a slight smile as he wiped some sweat off her brow.

"I'm sure. How long have you've been feeling pain, dear?"

"I – I think since I got up this morning."

"That long? Why didn't you say anything," Eren demanded.

"Forgive me for being preoccupied."

"Did you have any of the pain yesterday?"

"Not that I know of." Her eyes held steadily on Eren's as she answered Maria's question.

"How far apart and how long are –

"Eight min –

"Six minutes," Armin corrected. "Lasting just over a minute.

"Okay, you're almost ready, dear. Out with you boys, so I can take a look at her."

"But she's my wife. I've seen everything you're about to look at," Eren resisted and of all things, did he have to say that?

"I'm sure you have young man, but she will be just fine with us," Maria reassured.

"Yeah, but –

"It's okay. Keep Ar company. I'll ask for you if I need you." He watched her for a moment.

"This isn't about –

"It's not. Go. I'll make sure they get you if I need you. I promise." That seemed to settle him and he left with Armin's guiding hand on his shoulder, but she found a bit of unease blooming in her chest as she watched the door closing behind him. She bore it though as the two women felt around her stomach and poked and prodded at her. Despite their amiable nature and reassuring her that everything was proceeding as expected, it didn't help her growing nervousness as the contractions grew even worse, seemingly lasting forever. As a cry escaped her tightly buttoned lips, she wondered how she wasn't ready yet.

"I think we can start pushing in another fifteen minutes, dear. You're doing very well and progressing fairly quickly, so you've got an impatient little one. Keep breathing." This was quick? Would she make it another fifteen minutes? It was hot and she was sweaty, and she wanted to cry. Mikasa wanted Eren there, but she resisted. Putting up with a little pain for their baby was doable. She could do this. Her body seized up as another contraction hit and any sounds couldn't be held in anymore.

It just continued like that for what felt like hours. She wanted to push, but she already felt tired. Laughter bubbled from her throat when Maria took one last look at her and said it was finally time. Building herself up again to do this part was difficult, but she managed as they explained what to do.

"Alright, dear, here we go. Deep breath…and push." Mikasa bore down, tightening her abdomen as much as she could. "Good, just like that. Another deep breath…and push." On and on it went like that with little results. Stubborn, they said Carla was now being. She could see that. There was plenty of that between her and Eren. "Take another deep breath and we're going to push again."

"I can't," she said weakly shaking her head, eyes on the blurry grains of the ceiling, tears sliding into her ears. Mikasa had never done anything so hard, not by herself. "I just need a break."

"The longer we take, the more potentially dangerous it can be. I don't want you to lose too much blood."

"Just a small break, please."

"Two minutes. The next contraction should be hitting then." Her knuckles loosened on the sheets and came to rub sweaty palms over her equally moistened face. She could do this. She had to do this. She was strong, stronger than anyone she knew including Levi. There was no way he could make it through something like this. She was strong enough to –

"Is everything alright?" Her eyes dropped down to where his voice was coming from. "It got quiet and I – nothing bad happened, right?"

"Mr. Yeager, everything is –

"Eren." She vaguely wonders if he heard the need in her voice because he was at her side in a moment.

"How are you doing, Miki?"

"I've been better," she hiccupped trying not to melt fully into waterworks now that he was there. "This is so hard. We've done a lot in our life, but nothing like this. I don't know if I –

"You can, you're the strongest person I know."

"Not by myself. I can't do this one by myself."

"Then good thing I'm here." He smiled, the crinkle around his eyes settling her uneasy heart a bit. "I'll always be here, Miki. Forever, so just shoulder some of the burden on me, okay?"

"We're almost at two minutes. You're going to have to push again." It was true. Mikasa could feel the next wave building.

"Together? Just like we've done everything else?" He extended his hand to her, frowning when she shook her head in the negative.

"If I hold your hand, I'll break it."

"Then we're perfect for each other cause I'll just switch while it heals. Back and forth as many times as you need." She didn't require anymore prompting than that.

"Ready? Okay, deep breath…and push!" A cry ripped from Mikasa lips as she arched forward squeezing her stomach with all her might. "Very good. The baby's moved down some more," Maria commented feeling around her stomach. "On the next one, we should be seeing the head. Same thing dear." She bared down when prompted again, this time feeling a stretching, burning sensation.

"Alright, the baby is crowning. One more big push, as hard as you can. One, two, and three!" There was the faint sound of bones cracking as Mikasa pushed with all her might, but it was quickly overshadowed by loud angry wails. She slumped back into the pillows with relief, fully exhausted, but not relaxed, her eyes following the screaming reddish ball as the assistant moved off to the side. The small cries had her eyes watering all over again, her view effectively blocked as Eren pressed a kissed to her forehead.

Before long she was in a fresh nightgown and tucked into clean sheets. Eren's hand was like new as he sat beside her waiting.

"Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Yeager!" The midwife walked over, a bundle in her arms. "You have a beautiful little girl with all ten toes and ten fingers and quite the set of lungs." The world seemed so much brighter as the tiny weight was settled into her arms.

"She's so small," Eren murmured in awe. "We made a kid Miki. She's ours."

"I know," Mikasa laughed wetly, the sound making Carla open her eyes and look around. "She has your eyes."

"And your hair and your nose."

"Do you want to hold her?"

"Oh." He blinked as if he wasn't expecting to. "I – yeah. I do." She found herself wiping water from his cheeks as he stared down at their daughter. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Wonder at the tiny hand gripping her finger coloring her words.

"The sedative," he whispered, eyes flicking to her and back to Carla. "I got scared – I panicked. Nothing we seemed to be doing was helping or making a difference, and I was desperate seeing us so close to this happiness only for it to be slowly witling away with how you seemed to just be getting worse. I made a decision that I don't necessarily regret, but I am sorry for damaging our trust and not going about it in a better way. I just…didn't want this one to end up like all the others. I couldn't let it turn out like every other one."

"Thank you, I appreciate that, but I don't understand what you mean about this not turning out like the others. Like every other what?"

"If you're dreams are what I think they are, then you know."

"You mean…" He nodded. Mikasa felt like she'd been punched in the chest. So she wasn't slowly losing her mind. It all really happened and was not just made up in her head."

"I can't tell you why you're seeing those memories, but I do know for sure that this life is the only one where we get to have this. The only one." And Mikasa understood him a bit better even if she still didn't approve of the way he went about it. Could this have been avoided if she'd been honest from the start instead of trying to carry it all herself?

"I'm sorry, too. For not telling you. I felt – I…"

"We don't have to talk about it now, but we will. Soon. It's definitely something both of us need to work on, but let's enjoy this right now. You just gave birth! Look at how perfect she is."

"Yeah." It was insane how even after all this time together, they still both simultaneously leaned on one another, yet still tried to hide their pain to not make the other concerned. Maybe, they really were still healing from their earlier years.

"Well, dears it seems that you're all settled and in good condition. Let's get the little one fed and then we'll be on our way." As her baby suckled at her breast for the first time, Mikasa cried some more. Carla was annoyed at the droplets falling on her face despite them being wiped away immediately.

"I'm sorry, Carla. You're just so lovely," she apologized. "Having something as lovely as you seemed like an almost useless dream for so long, so thank you for being born into this world. It isn't always the best, but we worked hard to create it for you. You'll learn there's a lot of beauty in it." Her attention turned to Eren who was watching and fixed him with the sincerest smile she could managed. "Like your daddy and our life together. I suppose I should thank him too." He stared at her unblinking, face heating.

"Don't thank me for things like that," he said, gaze dropping to his hands. "It wouldn't be a life without you. Without you, sticking with me no matter what situation I got us into, we wouldn't have any of this. So, if you plan on thanking me, I'll thank you too. For our daughter, and being by my side, and loving me especially when I was a shit."

"You're welcome, Eren, but no cursing in front of the baby." He chuckled and got up as Maria and Elena came over once again, bags in hand, the room completely cleaned up.

"Sit down, young man. Be with your wife. Your certificate of birth and other documents are on the dresser. Everything looked well but if you need me, you nowhere to find me. Take it easy for the next few days, young lady and no intercourse for the next six weeks." Her punctuating wink made Mikasa's face burn, but she thanked them anyway as they showed themselves out.

"Is Ar still here? I think she's about done."

"Yeah. Get over here and meet your niece, Uncle Armin," he called from the hallway. Mikasa smiled at the blush on his face when he came in and shyly sat on the edge of the bed.

"I trust everything is okay. It sounded a little touch and go for a while."

"Both are happy and healthy," Eren said taking the spot on the other side of her.

"I'm glad. Wow, she really is a little thing," he said peering over the blanket. "Can I hold her?"

"Of course." He took her naturally and she had an errant thought of when he might become a father as well. As she watched him gently rock the newest member of their family, her eyes started drooping, body relaxing into the pillows, and she didn't fight it, didn't fear it. If what Eren said was true, this was the only one where their family, all of their family, remained safe and whole and alive and there was no real need to worry. There would be time to ask about the details later. For now, she would brave whatever nightmares she had too, if it meant waking up here with them, with their new life.

"Carla, you're free." Mikasa heard her husband whisper as she dosed off.

A/N: And there you have it! Your happy, fluffy ending. I liked this new ending overall, but there were some parts that I felt were lacking writing-wise on my end. Either way, I hope you enjoyed reading this new version and was not scarred by Mikasa giving birth. I thought it was pretty chill if not sickening sweet. Oh, I hope it was all in character too. It seemed to get away from me this time around. Anyway, next I'll be working on the next chapter of ATTBYAM.

Let me know you thoughts! Thanks for reading!