Chapter Two

If I Smile with my Teeth

(i think i believe me)

STAR CITY

JULY 17, 23:13 PDT

In the following days Rebecca started getting back into the pace of working on the streets. She went on patrols in Star City. Sometimes with Dinah, sometimes alone, but Dinah – as she liked to remind her – was always a call and a couple of minutes away, instead of across the country.

The League had promised them their own team missions, their own experience. But so far, after more than a week, nothing had come up. She knew the others were starting to get restless. The boys especially. And in their itch to get the ball rolling, to do something, they had gotten it in their head to pull Speedy in. To show him that this team was worth it. That they had been right not to walk away like he had.

And so, of course, they had to butt into Rebecca's case.

It had come as a surprise to Rebecca when three days ago Roy had dropped in on her patrol and pulled her into his case. There had been some movements by the docks and Speedy had been sure one of the local Kingpins, Brick, had been behind it. They had been tracking him for two days and apart from things pertaining to the case they had barely spoken of anything else.

Rebecca knew he had been as worried as the others about her month long radio silence. But just like Aqualad was too polite to question her on such an obviously personal matter unless she first volunteered to. Or how Wally, no matter how air headed and chatty he usually was, was empathetic enough to realize what was too sensitive for him to butt into. And even Robin, who poked his nose in everything – who probably knew it all already – knew her well enough when to give her her illusion of privacy.

Roy too, knew that she would come to him if she needed to talk about it. This was just his way of checking in, of knocking on her door and letting her know he was there.

She appreciated it, even when they had spent two whole days between strained conversations and strained silence, Roy's temper bubbling just under the surface. But their case had been going perfectly, and Rebecca had been sure they would end it on a high note. Even Roy's tense shoulders and snappish commands had mellowed the longer they worked quickly and efficiently together.

That was, of course, when the unwanted cavalry had jumped in.

They had tracked Brick and his men until they had every detail in their new 'business venture' down. Gotten everything: from the hour the shipment was coming in, to the exact dock, to the type of weapons they were, etc. All they needed was to move in. The boys had showed up on their way to the docks and they spent the entire trip there jabbering to Roy about the team and the cave ever since.

Rebecca could see with every sentence the way his shoulders tensed up again, and she felt the high of the case sink into her stomach. She could not see this intervention ending well.

And so here she was, in the shadows, atop a shipping container, watching the men down in the docks move wooden crates from the recently arrived shipment to their waiting vans. With an irritated partner and three interlopers scattered around – waiting on the signal of said irritated partner.

It was in the next moment, as the men loaded up the crates into a van, that an arrow flew down between their feet. Exploding into a smoke screen that made the men cough and drop their crate. Rebecca watched as it opened up into the laser handguns Brick was stealing.

One of the guns slid to Brick's feet, and as he picked it up and pointed it at Speedy, who stood atop a metal crane, she began her sprint across the containers.

"You again!" Brick called out, his voice echoing in the empty docks.

"I'm startin' to get insulted that Green Arrow's not messin' up my operations personally!"

It was then that Rebecca dropped down in the middle of a group of goons by one of the vans. Landing on the shoulders of one, she grabbed hold of his jacket before she sprung off him in a somersault, throwing him head first against the open backdoor of the van. Turning to swipe a high kick to the hand of the one lifting a gun beside him, she grabbed his arm and pulled him in, kicking him in the ribs and then driving a knee to his face. He howled as his nose crunched underneath the force, before she pushed him into the rest of the group.

"And you've brought a little Tweety too," Brick snarled before he began to shoot up at Speedy.

Laserbeams followed him as he jumped and ran across metal beams and walkways, until midjump Speedy turned and shot an arrow straight at the opening of the gun. The next blocked shot making it explode in Brick's hand with a boom and crunch of metal.

With a cry Brick looked at the tattered remains of his shirt and snarled up at Speedy, "Do you know what I pay for a suit in my size?"

Turning to the remaining men who had scrambled to grab hold of the laser guns from one of the crates, he growled, "Scorch the earth, boys."

Before they could turn their guns to Rebecca, who was finishing up her group, or Speedy, who continued his run across the walkways to the containers, a blur took out half the men. A couple of exploding metallic discs and the sweeping blue of Aqualad's water whip took out the rest.

With a grunt Brick pulled out a boulder sized piece of cement from the floor and threw it at Speedy, who ducked and fired exploding arrows down at Brick. His tough skin allowed him to stay intact but he was clearly growing irritated.

With another cry he threw a second boulder – which Speedy dodged and Aqualad cut in half – earning him a smoke arrow to the face. Turning to Speedy, Aqualad continued the boys' previous conversation, "The cave is perfect. It has everything the team will need."

As Rebecca jumped onto one of the last goons and wrapped her thighs around his neck in a chokehold, twisting to pull him down to the ground, Robin fell down beside Speedy and grinned, "For covert missions. You know, spy stuff."

Springing up from her crouch, she sprinted to the last goon who had staggered up and was pointing a shaking gun at her. With a leap, she kicked off his chest, snatched his gun, and used the butt of it to hit him across the temple. Kicking off the side of a nearby container she landed beside the boys right as Kid Flash sprinted in.

"Wait till you see Superboy and Miss Martian. But I saw her first!"

With a sigh and a look, Rebecca placed a hand on her hip and flipped the end of her ponytail over her shoulder, "While I am loving this "Junior League advertisement" can we focus on the big bad and his guns?"

They heard the crunch of breaking stone and turned to see another boulder come out of the clearing smoke. The boys jumped and scattered but Speedy drew his bow as Rebecca stepped up beside him and, with a short burst of sound, shattered the incoming rock.

Three more arrows exploded in Brick's face and as he was disoriented Rebecca drew in a large breath and leaned forward. Releasing it in another scream that spread like shockwaves across the docks, cracking concrete and bending metal containers, sending the people and vans flying.

The force of it had Brick grunting as he crossed his arms in front of his face, the ground cracking further under his feet as he slid back a few yards and stumbled head over heels to his knees. Digging his hand into the concrete, his fingers dug gouges into the stone as he attempted to anchor himself to keep from being completely blown away.

When the scream stopped he chuckled and, with a crunch of rock, pulled his hands out of the stone before grinning up at her, "Why don't you go call in Mama Bird, little Tweety? Now her, I like to hear scream."

Rebecca snarled down at him as his grin turned into a leer, before another arrow exploded in his face and he turned with a chuckle to Speedy. "Tell Arrow he shouldn't send boys to do a man's job."

Speedy just stared before he quietly pulled another arrow and notched it. Getting to his feet Brick laughed and spread his arms, a smug grin spreading across his face, "Go ahead."

Brick's smug face turned into confusion and then angry horror when this last arrow, instead of exploding like all the ones before it, turned into a pink foam that spread until it covered his whole body. His shouts became muffled as it slowly crawled over his face.

Sliding back into place in front of them Kid Flash leaned forward to look at the foam before turning to Speedy with a grin and a thumbs up, "High-density polyurethane foam. Nice."

Without a word Speedy turned to head deeper into the stacked containers and Rebecca watched the tense line of his shoulders with crossed arms and a furrowed brow.

"So, Speedy, you in?" Robin asked as he leaned against the gap between containers, Aqualad standing in quiet anticipation across from him.

Speedy paused, and turning to Robin he bit out, voice sharp, "Pass. I'm done letting Arrow and the League tell me what to do." he raised his chin before leaning in,"I don't need a babysitter or a clubhouse hang-out with the other kids. Your Junior Justice League is a joke."

The boys tensed at his words, smiles dropping, shoulders straightening, fists clenching.

"Something to keep you busy and. In. Your. Place."

Rebecca watched as the words he said – angry and biting and mean – hit the boys right in their soft spots. Watched as the joy of having their own team, an indication of the League viewing them as something more than just kids, was taken and turned into another leash. Another demeaning, placating, gesture of control.

Watched as every worry, every thought they had been stewing in all week – about this new team, and their independence, and their respect – was seemingly confirmed the moment Speedy spoke them out loud. As if now that they were out in the open, out in the universe, they couldn't be locked up in their heads where they had been futilely trying to keep them.

She couldn't stand to see the sight of them doubting their pride in their accomplishment. Because that is what the creation of the team was – an accomplishment born of their defiance. Of their need to prove themselves to the League as more than sidekicks. Which they had, they had. The League had seen something great in the boys and had rewarded them accordingly – had seen something worthy in Rebecca and Miss Martian and had invited them. She believed that. (She had to.)

This was their triumph, and she wasn't going to let Roy's petty anger at seemingly the world ruin what the boys had worked so hard for.

"I think you're being too harsh Speedy. The team is a good way to get used to a working team dynamic – with our future team members. Until we can be officially inducted in the League this is a great chance to show them more closely, as a whole, what we can bring to the table."

Roy turned to her then and sneered, the lines of his face harsh and uninviting. "I don't listen to the opinion of cowards who hide away when things get difficult."

Rebecca couldn't help it, she flinched back. And she watched as the boys seemingly flinched with her, taking a mental step back and glancing between her and Speedy with slight trepidation.

"Speedy," Aqualad murmured in warning.

Rebecca knew that he must've heard more about her from Dinah than the rest of the boys had, that even if he didn't know the whole story he must've heard enough to know she had hesitated, doubted. She also knew that he had been so worried that he had gone out of the way of his temper tantrum to offer her a quick partnership. That they had had a calm, successful (dare she say wonderful), two days of teamwork before the boys came.

She knew that he was angry right now – at the League for lying and coddling. At the boys for falling to their rules and their "games." Maybe even at her, if he thought she had been the one who had brought the boys in. But that didn't stop the hurt. The sting that bit right at that tender spot that she still hadn't been able to close up even after all these weeks of finding out the truth.

None of that stopped it from making her hurt. From making her angry. So she uncrossed her arms and stepped right into his space. Clenching her hands so hard the leather of her gloves creaked. She felt her face do something – a smile, or a baring of her teeth. Whatever it was, it had Kid Flash physically stepping back and Robin wincing.

"You know what? Speedy," she hissed, just as sharp, just as mean. Leaning right up to his face, "go fuck yourself. We don't need a tempermental, loose cannon, who thinks that throwing a tantrum is the way to getting respect. If you think that you're too good for us, then fine! Go! We'll do just fine without you. If you're expecting us to beg then you'll be waiting a long time, Your Highness. We don't need some overcompensating kid on the team anyway."

In a flurry of voices the boys spoke up over each other.

"Woah! Woah! Wait a second! Blue that's not–! She doesn't mean that–"

"Canary, c'mon. What he said was uncalled for but you don't have to– "

"Speedy you have the right to be angry but it does not mean you can take it out on Blue Canary. And Blue Canary, I do not think it is best to react with anger–"

Rebecca ignored them and watched the way Speedy's jaw clenched – whether in anger or hurt she didn't know, and at this moment she didn't care very much either – before he scoffed and turned away, "Whatever."

The boys quieted abruptly, and they all watched as Speedy disappeared into the shadows of the containers.

"Bottom line: I don't want any part of it."

In the silence that followed the boys glanced at each other before turning warily to Rebecca who had crossed her arms again and was glaring down at the pink foam with a clenched jaw.

"Blue…"

With a huff Rebecca cut Kid Flash off and turned to face them with a smile that strained her cheeks.

"Thanks so much for the assist boys but I think we're done for the night yeah? Why don't you go back and let me finish this off?" she asked, sweet and polite.

The boys quietly shared a glance before Robin reached out, "I can help –"

"It's fine," Rebecca cut off, walking to the edge of the container, "I've got it. Just gotta tie them up and call SCPD in. I can finish this part on my own."

Robin and Kid Flash still looked unconvinced but Aqualad put a restraining hand on their shoulders and nodded at her, "Very well. We'll be on our way."

"Great!" Rebecca chirped. "See you boys later alright?" With a two fingered salute and a wave she jumped off the container and onto the docks below. Ready to get back to work.

STAR CITY

JULY 17, 24:37 PDT

A round up of the goons for the SCPD and a short patrol later, Rebecca was climbing through the window of her guest room in Dinah's apartment. Locking her window, she sighed and pulled her hair loose from her tight ponytail, running her hand through the locks to get rid of the tension on her skull.

Peeling off her black domino mask she walked towards the bathroom and let her suit fall to the floor in a trail behind her as she discarded it piece by piece. Putting the water to steaming, she leaned her head against the tiles and tried to let the hot water get rid of the tense muscles and simmering anger that a forty minute patrol had been unable to clear.

She wondered how much the boys had gleaned from that conversation. Aqualad and Wally were the two the least in the know about her situation, she was sure. While they might not have believed the excuse that she was keeping to Gotham because of school (at least not after she refused the League's membership offer) they probably didn't know much about what she had been up to.

After today's comment she knew Roy had found out about her brooding. About her doubt and indecision, but he probably didn't know the why.

And Robin probably knew most of it, or suspected it at the very least. As a guardian of Gotham himself there is no way he wouldn't know what had happened in her last case, and a little research of the Bat's caliber would give him all the rest of the answers.

So now all of them were at least aware that something had happened that had made her run, that had made her hide away for almost a month. She worried how long it would take the rest of them – Roy, Wally – to go sniffing for answers. Because if there was one thing these boys all shared it was their need to be a big hero and poke their noses into things to "fix" them better.

She wasn't ready for it all to come out in the open. She wasn't even ready to think about it too long in her own head.

She was perfectly fine keeping it locked up and away. She was Rebecca Lance-Drake. She was Blue Canary. She was a hero. That was all that mattered. And she had no time for useless words and doubts. About useless hurt and anger (because she was angry – angry and hurt and confused and scared, that her life could be changed so easily. Just a few words, just a few truths, and it felt like nothing she thought she knew about herself was true anymore.)

(She tried to tell herself that being Blue Canary was enough. That having Dinah on her side, with her, was enough. But her reluctance of letting anyone know the whole truth was proof that she wasn't ready to face any of it at all.)

With a frustrated sigh she quickly scrubbed herself clean and stepped out into the steam filled bathroom.

Fastening a towel around herself she searched for the hair dryer and blew hot air at the mirror. Watching as the fog of the steam cleared with every pass of the purple machine. Watching as her face slowly appeared out of the fog, as pale and blue eyed as it had always been.

Turning the dryer to her wet hair she ran her fingers through the locks and stared as the strands turned from a dark yellow to a pale gold. Her bangs shortened with every pass of hot air.

She examined the face staring back at her, vacant and impassive. Took in the shape of her small upturned nose and the slight pout of her full bottom lip. The sharp shape of her brows and the slight dimple on her chin. The high cheekbones and straight lines of her square jaw. The clear blue of her eyes and the gold shine of her hair.

Picked out the features that came together to make her conventionally attractive, that she came to learn had come from her mother, and had to strangle the urge to throw the hair dryer at the mirror.

She turned the dryer off and stared at that face. That with every sweep of her eyes, with every picked apart feature, seemed to change until it was almost unrecognizable.

Taking a deep breath, she tried for a smile, and almost made herself believe it looked natural.

With a huff she pushed away from the sink and walked back into her room. She changed into a pair of soft pajama pants and an old t-shirt before she began to pick up the pieces of her discarded suit.

Carefully laying it out on her bed she took in the ensemble that came together to make Blue Canary. The dark azure bomber jacket with a collar and navy blue stripes across the biceps. The short sleeved, sky blue, skin tight short jumpsuit made of Kevlar. With its navy blue stripes across the hips and high neck. The tear resistant fishnet tights. The navy blue gloves.

Bending down she collected her black combat boots – steeled-toed and reinforced heels to give her kicks extra power – and placed them in her metal superhero suit case. Slowly, she folded the rest of her suit into its place to wash when she went home tomorrow.

She tried very hard to let the anger of the night go, but it was an old anger. An old hurt. Older than her radio-silence. As old as her first memories.

She thought she had forgotten it. That she was perfectly happy and fine living with Dinah and her Uncle and Aunty. She had let herself believe it – for almost eleven years she was sure that her life couldn't have been more perfect. She was with family, happy and loved. And then she was Blue Canary, making a difference, helping people like the old stories of her Aunty had inspired her to do.

But it was a lie. Her life was happy, of course it was, but there were some things she had fooled herself into believing she had forgotten, that she didn't care about anymore. All she had done was bury it instead. Let it fester – anger and hurt and sadness and questions. And that old minefield had been torn open like a bloody wound, all these years later.

And she wasn't sure what she was supposed to do with it now. Wasn't sure she could make herself pretend like she had as a child – make herself forget it all.

And so she walked around with it open and tender still, instead. Pretending that she could go back to her old life like nothing had changed, like she hadn't changed.

But she had, and her short temper to anything insinuated about her month long break proved it. And it looked like she needed to figure out who the Rebecca who had these truths thrust onto her was now. If she ever wanted to close the gaping, bloody, hole she was walking around with.

Rubbing her fingers against the lapel of her jacket, she stared sightlessly at her suit until a knock at the door had her turning to it, startled, to see Dinah, still suited up, leaning on the doorframe. A bemused smile on her face as she took her in.

"Dinah. Your shift at the Watchtower is done?"

"Yeah, John took over. How did your case with Roy go?"

With a sigh Rebecca threw her jacket into the case, slamming the lid shut, before she threw herself onto her bed.

Dinah winced and came forward to run a hand through Rebecca's hair soothingly, "That bad? What happened?"

Rebecca chewed her lower lip and contemplated telling her the truth. She knew the reason Dinah had been more lenient with her curfew and check-ins these past couple of days was because she knew Rebecca had been working with Roy and she had been worried about him. She had probably hoped that by working with her Roy might let himself be pulled back in when he calmed down. Or at the very least he would know that he wasn't alone, no matter his choice. And if you had asked Rebecca two hours earlier she would have told you that she thought it would work, now she was sure she had ruined it.

She had maybe been too harsh earlier, blinded by her hurt. But it wasn't like Roy hadn't crossed some lines either. Beneath the anger Rebecca was actually a little worried. Roy had always had a temper, quick to anger and quick to argue, sarcastic and sharp tongued. But she had never seen him this mean before, this quick to put them down. She knew that underneath his prickly exterior Roy cared about her, about the boys. She couldn't have imagined before today that he would have been so quick to say the things he had said to their faces.

Roy was blunt to the point that he was sometimes hurtful. But Rebecca knew that this hadn't been the case. He had been deliberate in his maliciousness, knowing exactly what would hurt. She couldn't believe that a little more than a month and a fight with the League could change him so much.

With a sigh she sat and turned to Dinah, whose brow had started to furrow in worry.

"The hit went fine. We got Brick and his men; they're in SCPD custody now."

"That's good," Dinah said slowly, knowing that more was to come.

"But the boys came and crashed the party. They started talking to Roy about the team and he–," she huffed and crossed her arms, "he was being a jerk about it so we got into a fight and I'm pretty sure he isn't talking to me now."

"Becca."

"I know," Rebecca groaned, "But he started it!" she winced on hearing how childish that sounded.

"You should have heard the things he was telling them! That the team was a joke and that they were being kept in their place – like they were dogs or something! And–" she hesitated as she started picking at her comforter, "and he said some stuff to me. About my break. And I guess I lost it," she mumbled.

Dinah sighed, "Oh, Becca. I'm sorry. I didn't think he had heard me when I was talking to Ollie about the real reason you had turned down the League. Ollie knew how excited you had been. How proud I was, for you to get this chance. He wanted to know what had really happened to make us back off." she said, taking a seat beside her.

"But I promise you," she said earnestly, placing a hand on her shoulder and tilting her chin up to face her. "I didn't tell Ollie anything important, nothing about what happened. I only said something had happened to you in our last case and you were taking some time to rethink your life. That is all Roy must have heard, if he even heard anything at all."

Rebecca gave a wan smile, "I know Dinah. I could tell he didn't know about that but, I still didn't like it and I got angry about what he was saying – about all of us! And, yeah. We fought and he stormed off. I don't know when he'll even talk to us again."

With a sigh, Dinah wrapped an arm around her shoulders and leaned her head against Rebecca's, "Roy is going through a rough time right now. Where he wants to prove himself, wants independence, and so he's acting out a little. But under all of that is still our old Roy and when he realizes what it is that he wants he'll come back, you'll see. Remember how I got at his age?"

Rebecca laughed, "Yeah you were begging Aunty to let you go out and fight like she did back then, that all your training had to be for something. Aunty was furious, she said you were too young, that our training was to keep us safe because of our gift."

"She wouldn't let me go even though Ted had taken over our training and made it vigilante intense years ago."

Rebecca grinned, "You went out anyway."

Dinah laughed, "I went out anyway."

"And the Bat caught you a couple of weeks in and scared you all the way to Star City."

"He did not!" Dinah laughed, ruffling her hair, "He told me that if I was to work in his city it would be under his rules and I was a rebellious eighteen year old who didn't like that. So I took advantage of my college applications and went to Star City to start my Hero name, under my own power. The Green Arrow was said to be less territorial then the Bat anyway."

"And it had nothing to do with Star City being on the opposite side of the country from Aunty, who was furious with you," Rebecca teased.

Dinah narrowed her eyes at her mockingly, "No it did not. I don't like what you're insinuating, Missy."

Rebecca giggled before her grin smoothed into a small smile, "And you became Black Canary."

Dinah reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind Rebecca's ear and returned her smile, something warm in the small curl of her lips, "And I became Black Canary."

She grew serious as she met Rebecca's eyes, "And you became Blue Canary. A strong, brave, hero and the best protégé I could ask for."

Rebecca looked into her eyes and noticed the seriousness in them, the bold confidence. She swallowed the lump in her throat, "And I became Blue Canary." She whispered.

Dinah gently curled a hand under chin and let the silence linger, heavy with history and expectations and promises, before she smiled again. A slight tease to her tone as she tried to lighten the mood, "Much earlier than I was allowed to go out. Which I would call unfair, if I do say so myself."

Rebecca gave a small grin, "Well you paved the way for me, so…"

"Cheeky brat," Dinah huffed, ruffling her hair, "Everything will be alright Becca. It'll all work itself out, you'll see." With a sigh and a kiss to her hair, she stood back up and noticed the metal case.

"You can wash that here you know?"

"It's fine," Rebecca said, sparing it a glance, "My extra is in the cave so I'll just take this one home and wash it there."

Dinah frowned slightly, "I'll have another one commissioned so one can be left here and you won't have to carry that case around."

"Dinah, I said it's fine."

"Hey I'm the working adult here alright? I'll have another one made. It's better to be prepared anyways."

With a sigh Rebecca laid back down on the bed, "Fine, whatever you say."

"Get some rest," Dinah called back over her shoulder as she walked out of the room, "You'll need that beauty sleep. Good night."

"Night." Rebecca laughed.

With the click of the door the room went back to silence and the slight smile on Rebecca's face slowly melted away. She stared up at the ceiling quietly for a while, lost in thought. Tracing the bumps and patterns.

Her phone buzzed on her bedside and she stretched out a hand to grab it. Reading the new message that came in.

Robin: Hey, we're meeting at the cave later today to see if Red Tornado has a mission ready for us. You in?

She sighed and turned to stare at the night sky through the downturned blinds of her window.

Oh Roy, look at what you've done.

Her phone buzzed again.

Robin: Becks?

Rebecca stared at the glowing screen and realized that the boys, that Roy, were right in a way. You had to go for what you wanted. You had to work for it. You couldn't wallow and wait for it to come to you. Rebecca was determined to fight, even with her reopened wound. She could never go back to being the little girl that was happily unaware of the secrets in her life. But that didn't mean that she couldn't become someone better.

There were things, questions, that she wished had never been answered. But now that they were all she could do was take them and make them her own. It would take a while, she knew, to be able to get over the anger and hurt they caused, but she would do it. Because like she had told Dinah almost a week ago, she was a Canary. This wouldn't be what would bring her down.

She would prove to the world, to the League, to herself. That the only thing that could define her, was what she made of her life.

Me: I'm in.

A/N: My first action scene. Hopefully it isn't too horribly written, no matter how brief it was. Gotta get used to writing action anyways, that's like half of Young Justice so...

Forgot to mention in the previous chapter - Story/Series song is 'Achilles, Come Down' by Gang of Youths.

The first chapter title comes from 'Dog Days Are Over' by Florence + Machine.

And this chapter title comes from 'Fake Happy' by Paramore.

Whatever familiar lines/dialogue and/or scenes you recognize come from S1 E3 - "Welcome to Happy Harbor" (previous chapter was S1 E2 - "Fireworks")

(Me and my sister laughed when we realized that I'm making a habit of writing a whole chapter based on only like the first or last five minutes of an episode).

Let me know what you guys think of the chapter. Thanks for reading.