Hel's POV

Two more days passed (it had been four days since Baldr had arrived) and Hel noticed, that the Bright One was growing more quiet.

At first she had just assumed, that he just adjusting to his new home.

But today he was wearing a concerned expression. Hel decided, that she didn't like it. Now, that the burdens of his old life were off his shoulders, she wanted him to smile genuinely. It looked so cute, when he genuinely smiled. But now he was having that troubled look on his face and that was not cute. The Norns knew his life had been troubled enough.

At lunch she brought it up: "Something is worrying you, Óðinnson. What is it?"

Baldr seemed embarrassed at being called out like that, but he cleared his throat: "Ahem, I don't want to offend you."

Hel chuckled; his politeness was just so adorable. "Go ahead, Baldr. While I could just read your mind, I'd much prefer, if you opened up by yourself."

Seemingly a little less awkward now, the light god continued: "You have been so kind to me the last days. I'm really thankful for that."

"I can hear a 'but' in that sentence."

"Uhm, yes, well … I don't really miss Asgard, but I do miss some of my family members."

"Understandable."

"And I worry about Nanna. I … you give me so many honours. I get to have my own quarters and I dine at your table, while she has to shovel snow …" He broke off.

The Mistress of the Dead motioned for him to go on.

"I don't question your judgement – how could I? But I still feel like her punishment is too harsh and the honours I receive are more than I deserve – hear me out!", he pleaded, when she opened her mouth to protest, "I know, that she wasn't a faithful wife and that she cheated on me, but the truth is that I've never done anything to earn faithfulness in the first place! I never kissed her in private, never confided or trusted in her and my efforts to make our marriage work were … poor. I wasn't the loving husband I should have been. Whatever affection I showed her was out of obligation and because we had a reputation to uphold. I cared about her, but that's not the same. And once our son arrived, he was my top priority. I didn't even desire her in the way a husband should with his wife."

"Ah, yes." Hel couldn't help but smirk in amusement. "In all the centuries of your marriage you've had sex, like … four times? How has no one ever questioned your masculinity?"

"It's not funny!", Baldr reproached her.

"Of course not, I'm sorry", she apologised. "I guess crudeness comes with being a Jötunn. Go on."

He frowned, but finished: "Bottom line is, I couldn't really give her the kind of love and attention she deserved as my wife. So of course she sought it elsewhere. I can't even say that I was surprised, when I caught her making out with my brother."

"But it still hurt you."

"Yes. Even so, I do not blame her."

"Still you should have confronted her", Hel told him with a frown. "An open conversation held on an equal level and with the willingness to see the other's point of view can do a world of good. At least it would have made your relationship healthier, had you been open with each other."

Baldr looked so miserable, that she couldn't help but pity him.

"Now obviously you two weren't meant to be, marriage or not", she went on more gently. "And now you're both dead. I think it's time you resolve your issues and move on. Don't you agree?"

.

Nanna's POV

Four days.

At least Nanna estimated that this was how long she had been here, since her only indication of the passing of time were the breaks.

But it didn't matter, she supposed, because she had been sentenced to snow shovelling in the palace garden non-stop.

The weather was awful out here. It was so icy, that your breath froze in the air, the fog made it hard to see further than a few steps and the frosty wind did its own work. But something told the dead goddess, that beyond the walls of the garden it was even worse. This was nothing like the peaceful, calm winter nights in Asgard. They had reflected the discreet, equable and aloof nature of the blind god, who had presided over them. Here it was just as inhospitable as could be expected of a place located in Niflheimr.

At least Nanna wasn't alone here. There were several other dead souls, who had committed wrongs that weren't bad enough to merit actual punishments, but still came with consequences. The dead goddess had quickly got to know some of the other workers and was currently bonding with the Midgardian woman, who was shovelling the snow off the path next to her.

"It's not always this windy", the woman tried to soothe Nanna. "Sometimes it's so quiet, that we can get it done within half a day."

"Well, today isn't such a day!", Nanna grumbled. "Anyway-", she shovelled some ice off the path, "-what are you here for?"

"Mortally wounded my brother-in-law, when he tried to rape me. You?"

"Cheated on my husband."

The Midgardian gave her a glance of surprise. "But why are you here, then? Normally-"

"I know, it's weird", Nanna interrupted, "But our marriage was so miserable, that – ugh! – Lokadóttir actually had pity."

"You say that like it's a bad thing", the other woman remarked and prodded at the ice on the way with her shovel. "Normally the queen sentences adulterers to suffer in a snake pit or to be chew toys for Níðhöggr, the dragon who chews at the roots of Yggdrasil. She must have had a really good reason to be as lenient with you as she was. Did he abuse you or anything?"

"No. Our marriage was just really loveless, while we played the happy couple in front of everyone. Our marriage was arranged, you see. At first I was ecstatic. But after a while, it became clear to me, that he wasn't happy with our marriage – or me, for that matter!"

"What a bummer!", the Midgardian commented. "And that never changed?"

"Hehe, nope!", Nanna snorted. "Never. I tried so hard to get him to love me, but it was wasted! He was always sweet to me, but he was sweet to everyone, so that meant nothing! All his tenderness towards me meant nothing! Marriage is supposed to be a partnership, but he and I each were on our own, always! Where was the point in that?!"

Her sight blurred and she sniffled, but vehemently rubbed her eyes on her sleeve. There was no way she would cry, not here, not now, not about this.

"Eventually I resigned myself to the fact, that I was trapped in a loveless and unhappy relationship, while everyone called me the luckiest woman in Asgard – hah! I was embellishment! Baldr's pretty wife, that was my signature feature! And that was enough for all the other women to envy or even hate me! Can you imagine how many hate letters and death threats I got?!"

She shovelled the snow and ice away even harder in an attempt to channel her hurt into anger, instead of tears, while her co-worker stared at her in obvious disbelief.

"But I never once complained! And why would I have?", Nanna scoffed bitterly. "I was married to Baldr, the best of the Æsir! Who would have believed me? And we had a reputation to keep, so all I could do was suck it up. I had a nice home, a beautiful, gentle husband, we had a wonderful son and everything was perfect!"

It was so hard not to cry right now. Especially not with who she knew was standing a few steps behind her.

But she swallowed the lump in her throat and kept ranting: "Of course it was! He didn't make me feel undesirable or like I wasn't enough, with how he always avoided me and slept with his back to me, like he couldn't bear to even look at me in bed – not to mention we never even had intercourse, except for four tries – four! – at having a child! He didn't leave me wondering what I was doing wrong! He wouldn't even let us be best friends or something! Oh, and did I mention his insecurities and severe depression? But he never once came to me with his troubles, so why would I go to him with mine? The only ones who noticed, that I even had any, were Loki's wife Sigyn (she's the best, really) and my brother-in-law Hermóðr! So I stopped trying to be the perfect wife, because the latter appreciated me more than my husband ever did!"

She ceased her pitiful attempts at holding back her tears.

"And that's how the affair happened! He was the one, who gave me attention, wanted me, held and kissed me, told me I was beautiful and listened to me! He was the one, who … who …"

"Made you feel loved?", the person behind her finished the sentence for her.

With another sniffle she turned around to glare at the newcomer.

There stood Baldr, looking absolutely devastated (good! He better be!) and Hel, looking somewhat sombre.

"Nanna …", he began, but she cut him off: "Oh, so now you want to talk?! Thousands of years of marriage, in which you only interacted with me out of obligation and politeness and now that we're both dead, now you finally hear me?! You – you unbelievable, oblivious-!"

Hel interrupted by clearing her throat: "Ahem! Would you two mind settling this inside?"

Then the queen directed her attention to the other workers in the garden and ordered, with a voice as eldritch as herself: "And what are you all standing around and gawking? Get back to work!"

.

Baldr's POV

Hel had directed them to the audience hall and told them to wait there for her.

In the meantime Nanna and Baldr had to deal with being alone with each other.

The atmosphere between them was so tense and thick, it could have been cut with a knife.

He so desperately wanted to say something, but suddenly there was this huge clot in his throat.

Nanna stood there, frowning and with her arms folded.

"Well? Didn't you want to talk?"

"I … uh … I … uhm …"

Seriously?! Now that he really needed to say something, he couldn't? Where was his eloquence, when he needed it?!

She was arching an eyebrow.

After a while Baldr grew frustrated at his own failure and tore at his hair. "Shit!"

He stopped short. Had he just …?

Nanna gawked at him. "Did … did you just …?"

Baldr flushed in embarrassment, while Nanna broke into laughter: "I can't believe it! You said the s-word! I don't think I've ever heard you use it before!"

"That's because I never did", he mumbled sheepishly.

But now that the ice was broken a little, he decided to try again.

"Okay, take two. Nanna … it's really hard to tell you how sorry I really am, without making it sound like I'm feeling sorry for myself or like I'm trying to justify my actions. Which obviously would be really insulting. Even so … I'm sorry. I deeply truly am. I'm sorry, that all these things didn't occur to me, while we were alive. I'm sorry that I couldn't love you, like a husband should have. I could never get past the fact, that I never wanted to marry and you had to pay the price – that was beyond unfair of me. I was so busy trying to please everybody else, that I forgot about the one person I should have cared for the most. I'm sorry I didn't give you what you needed and wanted. I'm sorry I never let you in, even though you were my wife. I guess Loki was right", he chuckled bitterly. "His roller coaster of a marriage with Sigyn is healthier than our relationship was. At least they love and trust each other. I did neither of those for you, so how could you have done it for me? Your bitterness and resentment are justified and in the end, I deserved what I got."

With that his apology was finished.

For what felt like an eternity silence hovered over them.

Nanna's expression was unreadable and Baldr was starting to fear, that she would lash out.

To his surprise she smiled. "Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?"

He returned the smile: "Once I stopped flipping out, no, I suppose not. But seriously – why did you never confront me? Obviously I didn't realise myself what a git I was being, so why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, firstly: like you just said, you always were so bent on pleasing everyone, that you had an internal breakdown, whenever it seemed like you couldn't. Had I told you, I wasn't happy, it would've crushed you. I couldn't have that."

"Uhm-"

"Apapapapapah! Secondly: you're a downright sensitive plant!"

"A what?!"

"You heard me."

Baldr gasped and theatrically clutched his chest. "Nanna! How ever could you say such a thing!", he cried and let himself drop to the floor, like the drama queen he was. "You're wounding my heart! Your words are sharper than the dart that pierced me! Oh the agony! What ever shall I do?"

She chortled: "Baldr, stop!"

He didn't stop.

"My last shred of pride has been shattered! There goes what little bit of masculinity I had! Millennia of being the god of light, peace, purity and justice, being a judge and advisor to the other Æsir, enduring their nonsense and putting on a brave face despite all hardships! A sensitive plant! What a choice of words! So liking nature, gardening, wisdom and knowledge more than fighting and getting drunk off my butt makes me a wimp? Now that's just hurtful! And from my former wife too! How could you betray me like this?! Oh, the tragedy!"

At this point Nanna was doubling over with laughter.

"Baldr! Stop – hihihihi – I can't take it – hahahaaha – it's too much!"

Baldr grinned up at her. "Hmm … I don't know …"

"Come on", a new voice chuckled. "Have some pity, Bright One."

The dead god blushed furiously, when he spied Hel leaning against the entrance and regarding the scene with a smug smirk.

"Uhm … I can explain-"

"Don't bother", Hel laughed. "I've been standing here the entire time. I just didn't say anything, because I wanted to see, if you two could resolve your issues on your own."

"They're not resolved yet", Nanna objected.

"You're right", Hel agreed. "But it's a good start. Things can only get better from here. Keep it up and you might become actual friends."

The Queen of the Dead came over and helped him stand up.

"By the way, Nanna, your punishment is over", she let the dead goddess know. "From now on you're allowed to dine at my table with Baldr. Come. You must be hungry. I asked my servants to keep the lunch warm, since thanks to a certain someone we didn't get to finish it."

Baldr's blush deepened.

"Let's go", the queen said nonchalantly and made her way back to the dining hall, followed by a still flustered Baldr and by Nanna, who was grinning smugly for some reason.

When he gave her a questioning look, her smirk grew wider and she motioned into Hel's direction.

"Not a word", he muttered and blushed harder, making Nanna snicker like a plotting court lady.