They Call me Satan
It's still dark outside when Santana awakes to her phone alarm going off. Yawning, while hitting the off button she gets up scratching her head and rubbing her eyes. She went to bed early because she had a party to plan for later the next day and even though it was a half-day she had a lot to do. Finishing homework for one and then attending her 2-hour lecture classes was a bit of a stretch especially since she was at the top of her class. And that shit was NOT easy because college was a complete bitch in the ass.
Therefore waking up at 6 am. Santana takes a cold shower because it makes her feel calmer when she wakes up early. She decides to wash her hair because why the fuck not. She had to look good today. But that was an understatement because she's Santana fucking Lopez and she looks good in everything. Literally everything.
She can make a fucking trash bag look sexy. Stepping out of the shower, she grabs her towel wraps it around herself, and walks to the sink. She looks at herself for a good 5 minutes before blow-drying her hair. 'All this fucking hair. It's ridiculous. I should cut it off.' She combs it out, adds some dry conditioner, and puts it in a bun so it can be somewhat curly by the time she gets dressed. Surfing through her closet, she chooses a skin-tight white dress that stops at her knees and covers most of her cleavage. It's too many pervs at this damn school and she doesn't have time for bullshit today. She puts it on and goes to look for her body moisturizer. Brittany, being her best friend is still asleep and she really needs to get up.
It's 7 by now and it almost time to go to first period. She walks over to Brittany's bed and pulls the long blond lock that is currently in her best friend's mouth. 'Ew'
She laughs to herself. 'She always was a hard sleeper'. "Hey, Britt. Wake up, love. It's time to get up now. It's 7". Brittany stirs but doesn't make any attempt to wake up. Santana shakes her head and tries harder. "Brittany. Im serious now wake the fuck up. We're gonna be late".
Brittany slightly opens her eyes to look at the woman above her. She smiles as she stretches like a cat. She sits up fully and rubs her eyes. "Morning to you too Satan". She draws out slightly annoyed that she had to be woken up. Santana rolls her eyes, shakes her head, ignores the abbreviation made to her name, and continues looking for her moisturizer. She's used to the nickname by now. Only a select few are allowed to call her that though. She finds her moisturizer in one of her drawers looking confused as to why it's there and not in the bathroom. Then remembers hiding it from Britt because apparently, she thinks it's hers. Britt really needs to get her own shit. Stuff ain't cheap.
Santana is lotioning her legs and is nearly jumping out of her skin when Brittany pops up and runs to the bathroom. 'What the hell'. She swears she can her Britt throwing up in the bathroom. Just as she walks into the bathroom the heavy wave of nausea hits her but she holds back cause she is not trying to be sick. She grabs the blond hair that covers her best friend's face and holds it back so it doesn't get puked on. "Jeez, Brit. Are you fucking pregnant?". Brittany's eyes that remain unseen go wide but couldn't answer. Eventually, she stops throwing up and lets San help her into the shower despite the comment Santana made a few minutes earlier and one she knew the answer to.
Santana being the concerned friend she is takes the silence as a possibility. She leaves the bathroom to call one slender mouth. 'Fucking Sam. Always doing shit'.
"Trouty Mouth," she says with a sharp tone when the call connects "did you get my girl pregnant?" Sam on the other end sits with his mouth open. "What the hell do you mean Santana? It's too early for this shit," he asks with slight but heavy hesitation in his voice. "I meant what the fuck I said, Sam. Did you get my girl fucking pregnant? And don't lie to me either cause don't think for a second that I didn't think you two were fucking around." Santana is hella annoyed by now paces around the room.
Why couldn't he just answer the damn question? It's a simple ass question. She's shaking and she's wondering if she'll ever stop. Brittany meant a lot to her even if she didn't feel the same way about Santana the way she felt about her. And if Brittany was pregnant then the chances of them being together one day was gone."I don't know." Is all Sam can say. "When?". Santana feels like she can punch someone preferably him right now. "A few weeks ago. I guess. Maybe the condom broke. I don't fucking know Santana." Embarrassed to be discussing this with Santana of ALL people. Like Santana was not a good person to talk to about heavy stuff. At least when she did, she was always honest, one of the best qualities she possessed.
'You guess. You fucking guess?! How many times have yall fucked? Shit. I swear to fucking god this will be the last time I leave her alone with you. Better not have fucked in my dorm room either. Just nasty. Disgusting'. In her own head, pinching the bridge of her nose she makes a disgusted face at the thought and makes a mental note to thoroughly clean up when she's done with thin lips.
Santana being Santana was always judging people and maybe she had the right to since everything she does was by her own merit. Most things anyway. She may be hot as fuck but she wasn't scared to tell it how it is. Far from it. "Sam. I am going to kill you. How the fuck do you expect Britt to raise a baby right now? In college?" Her voice cracks as she hears the water cut off. Santana may have a hard facade but she never lets anyone see her cry. Not ever. Not even Britt. "You know what? We will discuss this later". She hangs up the phone, tosses it on her bed, and runs her fingers through her hair. Brittany then comes out wrapped in a blue towel with her face expressionless. She gets dressed silently as Santana sits there and watches her in pure hopelessness.
How would Brittany be able to take care of a baby and study? Let alone dance.
Professional dancing could take Brittany places not a baby. Not right now. There was no way in hell Brittany could keep up with her classes. Not that she needed them but that was beside the point. Santana couldn't help her now. "Brit? I have to get to class now. I'll tell your teacher you'll be late. Can I see you at lunch?". Brit just nods her head and returns to the bathroom. Sighing heavily Santana makes her way out of their dorm suite and heads to class. The brief talk of Santana and Brittany's teacher goes surprisingly smooth considering how rude she is but that is Ms.Slyvester for you. Making way towards her first class swiftly on time she reads the note on the board. "I am out today. There is no sub, so feel free to study or whatever." Ms.Philsbury was always missing when half days came around.
Santana being the overachiever she is decides to finish some homework. Walking towards her usual seat, she sits and takes out her phone, and checks on Brittany. *Hey. You feeling better Brit?* She texts back almost immediately. She kind of felt guilty leaving Brittany in their room by herself knowing how Brittany breaks down but there was nothing she could do for her. At least not right now.
Hey, San. Uhh yeah im ok for now. Meet me and sam @ lunch? He wants to talk to you.* Santana shaking her head she replies with *Yeah sure. Im down i guess. Just know if he says anything to piss me off more i will hurt him. Despite him being ur baby daddy and all. I fucking despise him now.* She smiles to herself hoping to get a reaction. *YK wat fuck you Satan. Not funny. I'll see you later*. Smiling even harder she rolls her eyes and continues to study. She doesn't really need to study but fuck it she's here and her dorm is all the way across campus. Taking a few more notes on business transactions and how to talk to people professionally on the phone she packs up her stuff and heads to the bathroom to freshen up her make up not that she needs it cause she's fucking hot and she knows it. She goes anyway.
Nobody is in here so taking up space shouldn't be a problem. She pulls her mini makeup bag from her bag and sets it on the counter looking through its contents. Finding her nude lip balm, she reapplies it to her lips and making a pop noise with her lips when she's done with it. Returning the make-up bag to her standard bag, she shakes her hair a few times to make it look a little rushed for the effect. At this point it makes her look like she just got thoroughly fucked in the bathroom.
Welp. Oh, the fuck well. Better to be intimidating than intimidated. Or so she thinks.
The bell rings as she is making her way out of the bathroom. Sanatana relooks herself in the mirror and walks out. The hallway parts like the Red Sea. Everyone just stares at her. They know shes gourgeous and she makes it really obvious. Seeming as she has to plan a fucking party by tomorrow she decides to send her teacher a quick text informing her that something came up with her best friend. Which wasn't a complete lie. It's not like they took attendance anyway.
She decides to go back to her room. Brittany's in class by now so she's alone.
Making a few calls to make to collect the favors people owe her, she crosses off a list that provides the said favors due to her. Such as certain liquors or decorations and such. "I swear if you stock the place with brown liquor you will be down a customer and I'm fairly sure that you wouldn't like that now would you Jake?" Jake being the liquor specialist was always getting the liquors mixed up mostly cause he was a crack head but Santana how to turn him outright and right now she is specifically asking for white liquor. "I'll see what I can do Ms.Lopez." He quickly hangs up leaving Santana shaking her fucking head.
"Amateurs". By the time Santana finished her phone calls it was lunchtime. She gets herself together and prepares what she is about to lay on Sam for being an irresponsible thin-lipped fucker. Being a fling was one thing but actually literally fucking around was another especially since it when an outcome comes out of it. She shakes out the thought of seeing Brittany as a mother at 23. Barely even lived yet but here we are. And she knows Britt won't get an abortion because she cares too fucking much and it's just not suitable for a girl like Britt. That'll ruin her innocence. Not that she was innocent that innocent still. Not anymore now.
Sitting at their usual table Santana makes out Sam in the crowd between all the people. She gives him a strong-ass death glare. She stared at him with such intensity she might as well have fire in her eyes. Practically burning a hole through his head. 'Feel my Mexican third eye' .Sam stopped talking to his crew and looked directly looked at Santana.
His cheeks burned red and he made his way over to where she was sitting. Sam quickly texted
Brit. "Where the hells is you?! I feel like she might actually kill me". Brittany took her sweet time returning his text. She decided to let him sweat it out for a few. She knew Santana wasn't going to physically hurt him. But emotionally? Most definitely. "Wnt to the bthroom. Gimme a sec". Tucking his phone in his pocket, he brought himself to look forward to finding the one and only Santana Lopez looking at him with a perfectly quirked eyebrow. He just knew he was in trouble. No way of getting out of this one. As long as Snixx wasn't let out. Cause Santana looks hella pissed.
Santana was trying to keep Snixx intact because she was this close to letting her out. Snixx being the alternate version of Santana and when she let her out it was hell. Might as well be Satan for real.
"So. When did this little interaction happen?" Santana asked with her arms folded in front of her. Shoving his nervousness down his throat he forced himself to speak. "The last party we had on campus". Bugging her eyes out she scrunches her face as she tries to remember that horrific night. Alcohol was such a bitch when she couldn't remember.
It's Saturday night and it's totally freezing. Santana has drunk off her ass as usual and laughing among people she doesn't know. She doesn't give a fuck though. She straightens herself to see Brittany grinding against Sam her ass bouncing off of Sam's front pocket.Squinting her eyes she can see Sam has quite the erection just bulging out of his pants. She was quite impressed by his size. She would be turned on by the sight if she wasn't a raging lesbian.Sam's dick was basically begging for it and not so subtly either. Sam put his hand on the base of Brittany's ass and grabbed as much would fit in his hands.Santana couldn't believe how sexual Britt was being knowing that she wasn't really into that stuff. Santana staring at her best friend from afar sees her light blue eyes get darker by the millisecond.Brittany stands up and grabs Sam in a heated kiss despite how cold it was.Sam took her by her waist and pulled her impossibly closer. She whispered something in his ear and a big ass smile came across his face. He looked around and took Brittany by the hand and they never returned. Internally shaking her head drinking more tequila will knock her out for the rest of the night. But that image of Britt and Sam being intimate will be there, burned in her mind. No amount of alcohol will help her. None.
"Santana! Snap out of it. Snapping her fingers Brittany was able to bring Santana out of her trance oblivious of who the hell just called her name. Blinking her eyes she finds Brittany smiling wide at her, and Sam looking less uptight. Santana needed to bleach her mind. 'When the fuck did she get here?' She gets her thoughts together as she prepares what she's going to say to both of them. "OK. I have shit to do so I'm going to keep this simple." She looks directly into Sam's eyes. He shivers.
"Brittany is my best friend. Understand? If you do anything to hurt her or this baby I swear on my life Sam you will need to move to another fucking country cause I will ends you. Anything Brittany wants you are to get it for her. Got it?" Sam shakes his head vigorously. She looks to
Brittany pointing a finger at her in a circular motion. "You will not push him away. You are to keep him close. We will help you keep up with your studies and anything else you need okay?" Brittany smiles and gets up to hug her best friend. "Okay. I love you guys." Brittany gives her a kiss on the
cheek. "And we love you". Santana giving her a small smile. Sam reaches across the table to grab Britt's hand. He retracts his hand when Santana sends him a glare before giving him a wicked grin.
Santana leaves the lunch 15 minutes early so she can sort out this party shit.
No doubt Santana was the best party planner ever. Like the music was always on point and she always catered so the food was greatly appreciated. The theme was red, black, and white. Sexy but classy. Santana rented out a club for the entire day on Saturday and better yet it was karaoke night so people could get up on the stage if they wanted to sing and/or and rap and their hearts out to each one's desire. The bar was fully already stocked with various amounts of alcohol. So with the extra liquor, Santana was bringing it was going to hell.
Everybody was about to get straight-up fucked. And when Santana throws a party it was guaranteed that you couldn't remember a damn thing. This party was going to be the best one yet. And almost everyone was gonna be hooked on drugs anyway. Oh, the fuck well.
Going towards the exit of the school, she bumps into Artie. Artie was one of the best of the best DJs in the entire school. The state even. Artie was just a natural fucking talent. He really could make it as an artist. Santana told him this all the time and although it was annoying to Artie because it was really unlike her, he believed it nonetheless.
" Hey, you wanna DJ my party, Artie?" She leans against the locker as she talks.
"I'm offended that you even had to ask." Artie holds his hand to his chest dramatically. He gives her a bright smile and she smiles back.
"I don't know what you want me to say Arts. You usually blow me off to go on a date with a boy or a girl and I'm left hanging." Santana drops her head.
Ever since Artie came out as bisexual he's been desperate to be in a relationship with anyone. He's been closeted all his life, but ever since he started walking after his accident he's been more confident than ever. He can finally be himself. Out and proud like the rest of his friends. Now that he's not in a wheelchair anymore he can actually go on dates and stuff and exuse him if he wants to live his life to the fucking fullest. 'Can't always be at your service'.
He rolls his eyes internally. He looks up.
"I'm sorry San. You know ever since I got out the chair I've just been wanting to learn how to do things and take people out on dates and shit. But I promise I will DJ your party tomorrow".
"It's okay Artie I get it. You don't have to explain. And you know if you don't show up tomorrow I can and will kick your ass right?".
"Yes I know. Violet ass. I promise you. I will be there tomorrow. Text me time and place yeah?".
She nods her head and gives him a hug and a bright smile before he walks off-putting his headphones on his head.
After Artie walks off she sees someone walking away from her and even though she can only see the backside of this person she can tell it's a girl by the way she gets butterflies in her stomach. She never gets them with boys whatsoever so it's obvious. The girl keeps walking but Santana can swear she sees the girl look at her before she turns the corner. Her heart pounding and her breath catching.
'Oh no. We not doing this. Calm the fuck down Santana.' She shakes her head and takes deep breaths. She doesn't know why she's reacting like this when she doesn't even know the girl! Only one person has ever made her feel like this and this girl was not Brittany. Since she knew for a fact that Britt didn't like her back Santana was afraid of falling in love with anybody else. The rejection she just couldn't take. It happened too many times and Santana was not about to let it happen again. She couldn't fucking do it again. Having feelings was just not meant for her. At least that what she thinks. Shaking her head again she checks her phone. It's 12:15 and classes are over so she heads to her car and heads off towards the club for the party.
She gets in, hooks her phone to the aux and hits shuffle on her The Weeknd playlist. And just her luck today Wicked Games decides to come on.. the lyrics mocking her in every way imaginable.
She doesn't care though because she knows it's true. She turns the volume up, the bass boosting in her head. But knowing she's in her feelings she still sings along.
I left my girl back home
I don't love her no more
And she'll never fucking know that
These fucking eyes that I'm staring at
Let me see that ass
Look at all this cash
And I emptied out my cards too
Now I'm fucking leaning on that
Bring your love, baby, I could bring my shame
Bring the drugs, baby, I could bring my pain I got my heart right here
I got my scars right here
Bring the cups, baby, I could bring the drank
Bring your body, baby, I could bring you fame
And that's my motherfucking words too
Just let me motherfucking love youListen, ma, I'll give you all I got
Get me off of this, I need confidence in myself
Yeah, yeah, yeah, ohh, yeah, ohh
Listen, ma, I'll give you all of me
Give me all of it, I need all of it to myself
Whoa-whoa, whoa
So tell me you love me(Only for tonight, only for the night)Even though you don't love me
(Oh-whoa, oh-whoa)Just tell me you love me(I'll give you what I need)
Ohh-yeah(I'll give you all of me)Even though you don't love me(Oh-whoa) Yeah, yeah(Oh-whoa) Yeah, yeah
Uh, let me see you dance I love to watch you dance Take you down another level
And get you dancing with the DevilTake a shot of this
But I'm warning you
I'm on that shit that you can't smell, baby
So, put down your perfumeBring your love, baby, I could bring my shame
Bring the drugs, baby, I could bring my painOh, I got my heart right here.
Oh, I got my scars right hereBring the cups, baby, I could bring the drank
Bring your body, baby, I could bring you fameAnd that's my motherfucking words too, ayy
So let me motherfucking love youListen, ma, I'll give you all I got
Get me off of this (off of this), I need confidence (confidence) in myself Ohh,
oh, ayy, ayy, ayy
Listen, ma, I'll give you all of me (ooh)Give me all of it, I need all of it to myself
I need all of it, so tell me you love me, yeah(Only for tonight) Ohh(Only for the night)Even though you don't love me, yeah(Oh-whoa) Ohh(Oh-whoa)Just tell me you love me(I'll give you what I need) Ohh-oh(I'll give you all of me)
Even though you don't love me, ohh, yeah(Oh-whoa, oh-whoa) Ohh
She has to force back her tears because she can't cry about it. Yes the song is heartbreaking and it applies to her too much but Santana can't vent to anyone about it. because she doesn't have anybody. And if she starts crying now she'll never stop. She just wants to be loved even if she thinks she doesn't deserve it. She can't help but feel this way because of Britt, and though she'll never admit to herself or anyone for that matter, she knows a part of her will always love her.
Satan fucking hates feelings.