September 9th, 1995
London

"Ah, there's the violent shrew!"

Delia Fudge threw a stapler at Sirius as he swaggered into her office. He caught it with a smirk, much to her annoyance. Her eyes narrowed further when he slapped the day's copy of the Daily Prophet down on her desk. She could barely bring herself to look at it, well aware of what it would already say. She had heard enough in mere whispers already. If that weren't enough, Rita had, albeit unsurprisingly, made it a point to show nearly everyone she encountered the "dreadful" bruise that Delia had left on her cheek. It had taken a great deal of self restraint for her not to have shoved her heel deep into Rita's foot when she had passed her earlier that day. It had been a week. A week had passed, yet the story was still refusing to disappear, as a result of Rita's persistence. Delia's hands tightened against the edge of her desk, and she glanced back over to Sirius, who seemed more than relaxed. He was pacing casually, whistling to himself, though he stopped upon seeing the look she was giving him.

"Have I done something?" He asked, stretching out his arms.

"If you don't stop that damn whistling," Delia began, tension clear in her voice. "I am going to go mad."

"I believe you already have," Sirius silkily replied. "If the Prophet is to be believed, you've threatened no less than half of London to duels over the last year, have taught your children the Unforgivable Curses, and have a penchant for spending most of your free time complaining about how dull your life is with no less than Lily Potter herself, who apparently has a habit of extinguishing her cigarettes on people she doesn't like."

"For fuck's sake -" Delia began, scowling.

"It's all in there," Sirius put up his hands. "But don't worry. I'm not going to tell anyone about how you threw a stapler at my head. Good thing you missed, too. Otherwise I would have had to come up for a good reason as to why -"

"I told you," She irritably reminded him. "I don't want to hear the news for the next month."

"And you are not going to get that wish," Sirius replied, quirking an eyebrow. "I'm honestly impressed. I had no idea that you could put enough force behind your dainty little hands to cut someone's face. Though, I'm sure, you didn't maul Rita as she's claiming. According to her, you tried to claw her eyes out, ripped out clumps of her hair, and used a knife to stab her down the cheek."

Delia glanced between him and the Prophet, finally taking a look at it for more than a few seconds or out of the corner of her eye. Sure enough, Rita was on the cover, turning her head with, as Delia suspected, a feigned look of pain to show where she had been "attacked." The headline, unsurprisingly, was only a bit worse. Delia Fudge still has yet to acknowledge her brutal actions from the 2nd of the month. Has she something to hide, or is her pride as overwhelming as her ego? She scoffed, more than a few less than kind thoughts running through her mind. Her lips flattened into a thin line, and then a frown as she scanned further down the page. Well aware that Sirius was still watching her, she tried to be calm as she opened the paper to the article, but her anger seeped through. He laughed, only stopping and smiling at her uncomfortably when she took a moment to look up and shoot him another harrowing glare.

Everyone has known for ages that Delia Fudge is not the most sociable of people. Her reasons for having come to England in the first place prove that, what with MACUSA feeling her to be such a liability that sending her away was the best option they could fathom. It comes as no surprise, then, that her friendship with Lily Potter has been long suspected to have formed as a result of their mutual contempt for many of the people they have come in contact with over the years. If anything, the events of the 2nd of this month have very much proven that.

One could, of course, speculate as to why Delia and Lily were having drinks. It has been long rumoured that the Minister and Delia have quite the unrequited relationship. Anyone with eyes can see that Cornelius Fudge is absolutely besotted by his wife, though whether or not Delia -

She scanned quickly past that part, well aware of the increasingly ridiculous rumours that Rita had been pushing for years about her supposed affairs, specifically with, of all people, Lucius Malfoy.

- Lily Potter certainly is not as dainty as one would think. For a widower, one might imagine her to be a downtrodden, gentle soul, desperately haunted by the passing of her beloved James. She is none, except, of course, for the first in that, I am sure, her husband is by no means alive any longer. Lily, however, is coarse, filled with rage, and a chain smoker with a nasty habit of extinguishing (or attempting to extinguish) her cigarettes on the arms of people she holds in low regard. Following the attempt on the part of Delia Fudge to do me quite serious harm, Lily Potter pulled her friend back only to attempt to turn the uninjured side of my face into her personal ashtray. If it were not for my quick reflexes, I imagine I would have incurred even more harm than I did.

Oh, how dangerous some women can be. If one does not get sent back to the United States, then I do hope the other finds herself put under watch. After all, leaving these two to their own devices is, clearly, a terrible idea indeed.

"Did she capture it?" Sirius joked when Delia finally looked up. "Oh? Come now, give me more than just a tease!"

Delia frowned. "If anyone believes that, they're an idiot," She muttered.

Sirius began to laugh, stopping only when the door opened again. He waved uncomfortably at Cornelius, who looked particularly tired and hassled, though his gaze softened when he met Delia's. She sighed, gesturing to Sirius.

"I'm frightening, now," She said, sending Sirius a dark look. "And startling me like you seem to enjoy is not helping with that perception."

Sirius smirked. "That, Delia," He said, laughing still. "Is not something you need help with."

"If this is about Skeeter, I'm sure they'll give it a rest soon enough," Corneilus eyed her worriedly, coming over to her and gently massaging her shoulders. "Delia, are you alright?"

She briefly closed her eyes, lightly probing her forehead.

"Between whatever the hell this is and whatever is happening with the estate, no, I am not alright," She briefly glanced to Sirius. "Out."

He looked between them, bouncing on his toes. A few seconds later, he was gone.

"What happened?" Cornelius sighed when he saw that her makeup was slightly smudged. "Delia, love, have you been crying?"

"It's not because of Rita," She quietly told him, not objecting when he pulled her tightly into his arms. "It's my mother. Apparently she had some…..people take a look about the lake on the estate and, rather than finding whatever it was she had been looking for, they found bodies. Six of them, to be exact. From…from what President Vance was able to tell me, it was all done by the killing curse, though I'm sure the no-majs will come to their own conclusions."

His brow furrowed in concern. "How could that possibly happen?"

"The only person in my family, besides myself, that has magic is my step mother," Delia hesitated, feeling sick at the thought. "But I don't imagine it was necessarily her."

"Of course not," Cornelius lightly tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. "If you need to, we can always go to the estate ourselves, take a look at whatever happened, and -"

"And what about the kids?" Delia said, exhaustion falling through into her voice. "It's not exactly going to look good for them if we leave England at the first sign of trouble just to take a look at my parents' less than desirable….exchanges."

He considered that. "Fair, fair."

Delia was quiet for a moment, her entire body shaking. Cornelius pulled her a little closer, hoping to steady her. She rested her head against his shoulder, closing her eyes for a few seconds in thought.

"I'm going to talk to Allison," She finally said. "Hopefully this weekend. Her grandmother, at the very least, might be able to shed some light onto what happened."

Cornelius nodded. "Try not to worry too much," He murmured. "I know you're strained enough as it is."

Delia sighed. "That may very well be an understatement."

September 9th,1995
Hogwarts

"You look like an idiot," Cat rolled her eyes when Ron stepped into the courtyard with Harry and Hermione alongside him. "Did Snape set your hair on fire?"

Ron shuddered. "Worse," He replied. "He smacked me and then assigned two more rolls of parchment for my paper on….something to do with incense or some shit. I don't fucking know. I'm just glad this is our last year of potions."

"Not if you want to be an auror," Hermione reminded him. Both Harry and Ron groaned. "It's a requirement! Did either of you pay attention to what Professor Tonks said about it?"

Harry squirmed. "Well -"

"How am I supposed to remember -" Ron started.

"And this is why you two would be lost without me," Hermione sent them both a pointed look. "How many papers have I let you copy out of mine?"

Harry and Ron exchanged variously uncomfortable glances. Cat snickered, pushing up her glasses.

"You two should let Fred and George do their candy experiments on you," She smirked. "If you two aren't going to write your own papers, you should at least make some money."

Ron grimaced. "I'd rather not die," He told her. "I'll let those first years who don't know any better accept sweets from my brothers and your sister."

Cat rolled her eyes. "Lex isn't developing them. Just marketing. There is a difference."

Ron shrugged. "If she can make sweets that cause you to break out in boils appealing, then she's lying to those kids because there is nothing appealing about any of that."

"They're trying to teach these kids how to break the rules," Hermione muttered. "Or at least get out of class. Not surprising, but disappointing. And," She scowled at Ron. "I'm still pissed that you wouldn't tell them off with me and instead decided it would be best to throw me under the bus."

Ron considered that. "Alright," He said, taking a small step back. "One, what they're doing isn't that bad. I wouldn't try anything they're giving people, but they've done far worse. I mean, during our first year they really did send Ginny a toilet seat!"

Cat glanced at them, thoroughly disgusted. "What is wrong with them?"

Ron and Harry both started laughing.

"That's what changed your mind?" Harry exclaimed.

"How could you forget that?" Ron stared at her in disbelief.

"All I remember from that year is that you three nearly got yourselves killed," Cat said, haughtily crossing her arms. "Oh! And there was something about a three headed dog. If anything, y'all telling me about that only enhanced my fear of dogs. Well, that and what happened shortly before the winter holidays two years back. I'm still pissed at Sirius for jumping me like that."

Harry chuckled. "Your mum is too. I don't think she can be in a room with him for more than a minute without threatening him."

"In case you're forgetting what happened at the Yule Ball last year," Hermione gave Ron and Harry a solid glare for nearly a minute, causing both boys to squirm. "And I certainly haven't, though that's beside the point, Delia was so drunk she could barely walk. The Minister had to help her, and before that she said some less than advisable things to Viktor."

Ron matched her glare. "She called him a fool, which was pretty damn true. Don't act like she called him a slut or something."

"That sounds like her," Harry remarked, laughing still. "She did say that to my mother once. She didn't take it well. If mum and Delia weren't friends, I imagine they'd be each other's worst nightmares."

Hermione looked between them, eyebrows raised, but, sensing she would get nowhere, let it go and instead reached into her bag and pulled out some of her knitting.

"So, I was thinking that we could use some of these for SPEW," She started, her eyes narrowing once again when Harry, Ron, and Cat all groaned to various degrees of dramatisation. "What?"

"I forgot that was even a thing!" Cat admitted, looking at the knitted clothes with a raised eyebrow. "And are those for elves or a rather lumpy infant?"

Hermione stuffed the knitting back into her bag, frowning. "Helpful," She said dryly.

"They're fine, Hermione," Ron said, putting up his hands in surrender. "Hey, they don't want to be freed! Stop trying to -"

"They don't want to be freed because they don't understand what freedom is!" Hermione protested. "Dobby gets it!"

Harry sent her a sideways glance. "Dobby isn't exactly a normal elf. If I hadn't told him not to, he would have bitten Delia's feet over the summer on my mum's….orders."

Cat burst out giggling, almost falling over. Harry, Ron, and Hermione all watched her, variously concerned and amused, when she finally laid down on the grass, still giggling, and curling into herself.

"Have you been drinking?" Hermione asked, eyeing her strangely.

"Let the moss reclaim me!" Cat declared. "I -"

Harry and Ron, seeing her start to roll around madly, shared a look and picked her up off the ground themselves. Harry held her by the shoulders, and Ron grabbed her feet. She let out a brief shriek and started flailing wildly.

"This is kidnapping!" She jokingly yelled, very much enjoying the myriad of odd looks other students (and a couple of professors) were giving her in the courtyard. "Hey! Put me down!"

"Not until we're sure you're not going to do something stupid," Ron told her.

"This is even worse than that thing you roped half your house and Fred and George into last year," Harry remarked. "How did you get that many students to clap and yell 'Hogwarts' while walking to each of the events every single time?"

"That," She wheezed. "Was because half of my house thought it would be fun to show up Durmstrang, and I convinced Fred and Geroge to teach it to the rest of the Gryffindors. I got Luna in on it too! She and the Ravenclaws really perfected it!"

"You should do that at Quidditch," Hermione told her with a smirk. "Except be the only Slytherin apart from Lex screaming for Gryffindor."

"No," A calmer voice interrupted. "You are not roping my sister into doing that again."

Hermione turned around in surprise, and Harry and Ron nearly dropped Cat, who waved at her sister, glasses slightly askew and her pink hair almost sticking up every which way.

"Lexenly Morgana Fudge, you can't control me!" Cat dramatically declared. "I am invincible! I'm -"

"You're being carried by two of your friends and look a mess," Lex replied, eyeing her sister in concern. "I won't say anything to mum, but have you been drinking?"

Cat groaned. "Why does everyone assume that?"

"Because of what happened during your third year," Lex said, brushing off her sister's robes the second she was standing again. "Also, your tie is on wrong. Let me fix it for you love."

Cat sighed and let her sister fix her up quickly. Then, Lex tightly hugged her.

"I heard about what happened in Divination," She whispered. "Are you alright?"

Cat hesitated. "Trelawny just got a pressure point wrong, no big deal. I've fainted before, it's fine."

Lex stared at her for a few more seconds before nodding and releasing her.

"Make sure you eat something tonight," She sent her a pointed look. "And something other than just a granola bar, please."

Cat glanced around, looking almost as if she were spacing out. "Um...okay," She said, clasping her hands behind her back and bobbing on her feet.

"Good," Lex looked warily to Harry and Ron. "I'm almost afraid to ask, but why were you two carrying her?"

"It's not worth it," Hermione whispered to her. Lex raised an eyebrow. "Don't dwell too much on it. You'll go mad."

"I think all of us are going to go mad this year," Ron remarked, shrugging when they all turned to him. "What? I mean that in a good way! Besides, when else have we gotten to see a sane professor sass Malfoy so much? Exactly what I'm saying! Exactly!"