It is like a dream. A wonderful dream. A dream in which he never wanted to ever wake up from. A dream that he has had so many times before but nothing like this. Nothing ever quite like this. In this dream he could feel her. Could truly feel her as though she is really there. Feel her soft skin against his own as his hand rests down on her lower back. Can feel how soft her hair feels within his fingers as they gently thread through her long blonde hair. Can feel her hot breath against the crook of his neck as she sleeps peacefully against his side holding his arm tightly against his chest. Such feelings that would often make him wake up alone with tears trickling down his cheeks knowing fully well that it could never be a reality again. Knowing fully well that he would never be able to wake up to see her again. Never again would he be able to see her smile. Never again would he be able to hear the sound of her laughter. Never again would he hear her voice telling him that everything would be alright. A voice for so long he has longed to hear. Even just for one more time. A voice that he can still remember like it was yesterday. Remember the feeling of her fingers resting against his cheek. Still remember the feeling of what her lips tasted like. Remember how soft and gentle her voice sounded when she said a couple of words that for the first time in over a year brought hope and happiness into his heart.
But these were just that. Memories. Memories of the past. Memories that in due time would become nightmares to him once this dream would come to an end. Once this nightmare would carry out into the real world. A world now in which seems so dark to him now. Seems to no longer have any meaning to him whether he lives or dies. Whether or not he should continue to do the things that he does each and every single night. What would be the point? What would be the point when your heart isn't truly in it? What would be the point when the one person that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with is no longer there. Is no longer there to share your dreams with. No longer there to face your fears together. No longer there to make life worth living.
He could still remember her words. The very last words she had ever spoken. Words that one by one felt like he was getting stabbed in the heart. Words that showed he had wasted his chance. Had wasted his chance to be with her. Words that showed him that he had made a mistake. He had misjudged everything. He had put her off to the side in favor of another when his heart was pleading for him to do the opposite. A mistake that he has sworn to never repeat again. She was right about one thing. He may be the love of her life but she was wrong about who was his. Felicity Smoak was never the love of his love. No that title had been claimed long ago by another. The very same brunette that had watched him sail off. The very same law school student that he would dream about every single night on the island. The very same bookworm that in many ways helped give him the strength to carry on during his darkest hours.
And none of this mattered. Not anymore anyways. She was gone and he was here. That is the way it is and the way it would forever be until the day they are reunited. A day that with each passing day he hopes is getting closer. Hopes that perhaps it would be the night that The Green Arrow would fall. Hopes that perhaps this would be the night a low level criminal will get off a lucky shot that puts him down for good. Hopes that perhaps tonight he would hear her voice once again before he is whisked off to the other side by his guardian angel. He just hoped she didn't take too long to get here. The pain was almost unbearable now.
Feeling a droplet landing down on her cheek followed by another that starts to trickle down her cheek coming from high above groggily turning her head slightly cracking open her dazed and sleepy eyes as she sees a pair of blue watery eyes looking down towards her with silent tears trickling down his cheeks lazily reaching up to wipe away the tears with her thumb without relinquishing her hold on his arm slowly sitting upright a look of deep concern comes across Laurel's face before gently she brings his head down to rest against her chest only to feel his arms immediately wrap around her tight pulling her even closer to his side.
" Shhh. It's okay. Everything's okay now. I promise."
" Laurel?"
She couldn't believe what she was seeing. A sight that couldn't be real. It just couldn't be. Laurel Lance. A friend. Some could argue her mentor standing before her right now looking as though she hasn't aged a single second since the last time she had seen her. A woman that just stands at the open doorway of what used to be their shared apartment looking straight at her with a neutral expression. Looking at her with a bit of steel in her eyes. A look that she has seen many others wither and cower away from. A look that too makes a cold chill run up and down her spine even though at this moment her body reacts the exact opposite and instead lunges forward wrapping her arms around the older blonde and bury her head into her shoulder as tears threanten to fall. An embrace that is very one-sided for a few seconds. A few intense seconds before an arm comes up to gently wrap around her and a head comes down to rest against the side of her own. An embrace that she doesn't want to break away from as she silently sobs into her shoulder before she is forced to look up into her eyes when she feels a hand gently coming down to rest on her shoulder.
" Can I come in? There are things we need to discuss and i rather not discuss them out here. You know? Me being legally dead and all. It might cause a little bit of a scene."
Unable to keep the grin from appearing on her face nodding her head unwrapping her arms from around the older woman reaching up to wipe her eyes on the sleeve of her shirt stepping off to the side allowing her passage inside taking a moment to peak each way outside of her apartment door finding nobody in sight backing way slowly Thea reenters the apartment closing and locking the door behind her before she turns to look back into the apartment finding Laurel walking around inspecting the whole place. An apartment that she will find to her great surprise hasn't changed all that much. She just never had the heart to do so. The same photo frames resting on the dusty shelf next to a large bookshelf. The same leather couch off in the corner of the room facing the same television set that she had moved in with. But there was one difference. A difference that is caught on quickly by the older woman. A difference that Thea watches in silence as Laurel slowly makes her way across the apartment in the direction of her old bedroom. A bedroom that is closed off. A closed bedroom door that she watches her stop in front of before slowly she opens the door and enters finding everything just the way she left it. A sight that earns her a look in question before she silently makes her way over towards her as she sees her eyes being drawn to her bed. The only thing in the entire room that has been touched. A bed whose sheets have been torn on the sides with hints of blood on them. A bed where at the foot a picture frame could be seen facing down. A frame that Laurel is drawn to like a moth to the light and slowly turns over in her hands finding it to be an old picture of her and Oliver from long ago. A picture that is so new to her. A picture that she hadn't even seen before. A scene that makes her glance back towards Thea with a good idea of what had transpired here causing her to witness a watery smile to come across the younger girl's face that just tells her all she needs to know.
" He used to come here every single night. Sometimes I would clean up any fresh wounds he had. Other times he….he would come here covered in blood with this look on his face. This like emotionless look on his face like he just didn't care anymore. Like he just ..."
" I know."
Looking away from the picture frame and towards Laurel's face after a few seconds of watching the older woman almost lovingly rub the photographed Oliver's cheek with her thumb catching her eye Thea gives her a questionable look.
" I was with him the whole time."
" What do you mean you were with him? I don't understand."
Glancing away from the photo frame seeing nothing but confusion across Thea's face looking away for a moment to the far end of the room with an thoughtful look coming across her face slowly Laurel returns her gaze back down towards the photo frame.
" It's hard to explain. It was like living in another person's dream. I could see everything through his eyes. Every single man that he killed. Every single time he drove an arrow through another heart like I was the one doing it. But it went deeper than that. It started and became something much worse."
Hearing her go suddenly silence fearing what next might come out of her mouth cautiously reaching out gently Thea lays her hand down on Laurel's shoulder. A touch that just springs tears to the older woman's eyes that silently drip down to the photo frame.
" I could feel it. I could feel his pain. I could feel him suffering each and every single day and night. I could feel his will to live withering and dying away. Even this morning when i woke up in his arms and kept telling him that everything was alright he didn't believe me. He thought all of this wasn't nothing but a dream. A dream that he would wake up from at any moment."
Reaching up to furiously wipe away the tears that continue to fall gripping the photo frame tightly to the point where her knuckles start to turn white in an instant Laurel turns her eyes to look towards Thea finding silent tears of her own trickling down her cheeks.
" He broke down in my arms. No matter what I told him, he just wouldn't stop crying. I've never seen him so vulnerable before. I knew this could happen one day. The moment one of us went down out there i knew this would happen but this was different. He ..."
Unable to speak the words out loud closing her eyes taking a shaky breath slowly Laurel lowers herself down to sit on the foot of the bed before her hand comes up to wipe away the tears that start to free fall from her cheeks. A scene that immediately makes Thea take action by sitting next to her and put an arm around her shoulders hoping against hope that the words she fears doesn't escape the older woman's mouth.
" It's like he wants to die."
And just like that her breathing comes to a stop as she feels like someone knocked the wind out of her. Words that she never hoped to ever hear come from another. Words that she knew deep down. Deep deep down that she knew to be so true. She had seen the looks across his face so many times before. A look that would often make her cry when she was alone. A truth that she had buried deep down inside hoping that one day he would find his peace. But not like this. A truth that even now stings so badly that tears start to furiously free fall down from her face before with a shaky breath she whispers out.
" What do we do?"
Glancing to her side through blurry vision seeing the same reaction across the younger woman's face reaching out gently Laurel takes Thea in her arms and buries her head into her shoulder as she feels her doing the very same thing.
" I'm taking him away from this place. I'm gonna give him a reason to live again. We'll go as far away from this city as possible but I need your help."
You are now leaving Star City
A billboard that she never thought she would ever look at with such emotion building inside of her. With such anticipation and yet traces of fear lurking within her from what the path before her would bring. A great unknown of what is to come. Of what their lives would become. The man sitting right in front of her. A man whose eyes continue to stare up towards the billboard through his helmet while his hands never leave the handles of the motorcycle. A man that she knew what was going through his mind at this very given moment. The words of his late father. Words that had started his mission to save this city. A city that has seen so many faces rise up from the shadows. Some that have emerged as heroes in their own rights. Others that have emerged as something much worse. True monsters of this world in the flesh. Men and women driven by nothing but greed. Driven by nothing but the internal struggle to have more power and rule it all at any means necessary. Monsters that he had fought. Monsters that she has seen inside and outside of the courtroom. Monsters that can never be defeated. Monsters that will always be there no matter how hard they try. No matter what they do, another will rise up in the other's place. A mission that will never be completed but the objectives? The objectives on the other hand had been completed long ago.
" This city. Star City….it's not your responsibility. It never has been. The responsibility belongs to every single man,woman,child that calls Star City their home. Your mission Oliver ... The task you set out to do long ago has been completed. You saved us. Each and every one of us. You've given this city something that it had lost long ago. It's now time for us to leave here. Let the city that we both love flourish and fend for itself now. The citizens need to take care of themselves now. It's no longer the other way around."
The last words she had spoken to him before they stopped here at this billboard. Stopped here to pay one last glance back towards the city that they have spent most of their life in. Had grown up in. Had met in. Had fallen in love in. Had lost each other only to be reunited in. A city that after this day neither would ever step a foot inside of again. Looking away from the billboard and back forward finding him staring back towards her smiling slightly underneath her own helmet wrapping her arms tightly around his waist and leaning her head against his back that just gives him the extra push that he needs hearing the sound of the motorcycle's engine coming back to life instantly Laurel feels herself moving with nothing but the wind hitting her as the motorcycle disappears up the road and deep into the horizon.