"Vodka? Fuck yeah! Gimme. Its been ages since I had a drink." Jace said as he sat down in next to Alec and saw the bottle, "also, hello parabatai mine. I was expecting a hug but if you want to stare at me for ages, that's fine as well."
Alec had a million things he wanted to say to Jace at that very moment. He wanted to tell him about everything that has happened in the past 6 months, he wanted to apologize for not supporting him, for letting his jealousy come in between their bond, he wanted to tell Jace how fucking loved he was. But he did none of those things, this wasn't the time.
"We aren't parabatai anymore." was what he said, hoping that his voice wasn't betraying the truckload of emotions he was currently feeling. (Although, looking at the knowing expression on Jace's face and seeing the disbelieving look Izzy gave him as she sat down on the Jace's other side, he wasn't particularly successful).
"So as you can see he's still as emotionally constipated as ever. Welcome back, Jace!", Izzy said with a smile when she realised that Alec wasn't about to say anything else.
"Thankfully his boyfriend is a centuries old warlock with the patience of a saint."
"Bold of you to assume anyone else would have been able to handle our angry young man."
Alec turned a deaf ear to his siblings teasing. He was used to it and if he was honest, he had been missing it the last few months. He would rather take this time to organize his thoughts and feelings. He still wasn't sure what to say to Jace, which was surprising, since he had shared a soul with the guy for more than a decade. Yet. He felt as if he was walking on eggshells. One wrong move and Jace would leave again, and Alec would be left in the dark without a flashlight.
Alec was so lost in his thoughts (again, for like the 5th time this week itself. Maybe he was getting old), that it was a while before he realized that his companions were silent. Izzy was asleep, her head nestled on Jace's shoulder but Jace was very much awake and he was looking at Alec waiting for him to speak.
Alec cleared his throat, suddenly more self conscious than before.
"What the fuck is up with you?" Jace said finally losing his patience. "It's been an hour and you have been lost in your own world. You haven't even hugged me. Is it me? You don't want me here? Are you angry because of what happened, what I did? Because if its that I am sorry, Alec. I really am, I never meant to cause you pain and I am feel so guilty. And I can go back to Idris, I don't want to be a burden."
"You were never a burden, Jace. You know that."
"Then why? Why won't you talk to me?"
And it was the pain in Jace's voice that almost broke Alec all over again. He had gone through so fucking much, yet he was still here, strong and beautiful. Maybe Alec should learn that from his brother.
"Because I don't know what to say! I am scared that if I start talking I will beg you to stay, to reestablish the bond. I don't know how to live without it. Its been 6 months and I still get confused and start panicking when I don't feel you."
"But the bond didn't break."
"Of course it did. See, no rune." Alec said, lifting his shirt and showing Jace the empty place where his parabatai rune should have been.
"No rune doesn't mean no bond. I love you, Alec. And you are my parabatai, rune or no rune. We will get the rune again if it's that important. I kinda miss it too."
Alec was very much aware that tears were streaming down his face. All the pain and anguish he had kept inside was coming out at once.
"I love you too, Jace. You are and will always remain a part of my soul." Alec swore, finally throwing his arms around his parabatai, minding a sleeping Izzy on his other side.
"You can stop pretending now, Iz. It is after all your turn. What is this I hear about you and Simon? The fuck?" Jace said once Alec finally let go of him, before turning all his attention to his sister.
"We need more alcohol for this conversation." Alec declared before Izzy could start, he was in no mood to listen about the daylighter touching his baby sister. "And it is too cold so we are all shifting inside."
"Yes, mom." Jace said with a mock salute as he got up and helped Izzy up as well. "Lead the way."
And as the three siblings went inside the warm Institute they called home, laughing and joking and teasing, they were after a really long time : happy.