December 25, 844

-Part II-

"Thought I'd find you here."

Levi squinted up from the short grey tombstones. A familiar figure sporting a crown of gold and a faded green overcoat trudged his way. Erwin, who had raced so resiliently through the cold with his hood cast off and face exposed to the elements only a few hours ago, now had half his chin hidden by a thick scarf and his gloved hands were tucked into his pockets. Tightly hugging the outline of his broad shoulders, rosy shades of dusk melted into the night.

Levi picked up on a lingering scent of pine mingling with Erwin's usual cologne when the Squad Leader came to stand by his side.

"You look out of place," Levi told Erwin. It was known that Erwin despised cemeteries. I will grieve the fallen with every swing of this sword, he had said to Levi once, and not by disrespecting their sacrifices with self-centered moping.

It was a philosophy which Levi was steadfastly adopting.

"I feel out of place," Erwin acknowledged. He set his strong, large hand upon Levi's shoulder. Through the heavy wool of his winter coat and the dark leather of Erwin's gloves, Levi could still feel his overwhelming warmth.

Together, in silence, they read and reread the dates and the names before them. Both were keenly aware that no bodies lay under the grass upon which they stood; only scrapes of embroidered fabric, remnants of bloodied emerald capes which Hange helped Levi forage for and retrieve on his second expedition.

"Then why are you here?" Levi asked him.

"To relay to you orders."

Levi's expression darkened. "Tch. Shadis can't give it a fucking rest, can h-"

"My orders."

Levi paused. He narrowed his eyes at Erwin, who turned to him with a small, patient smile.

"You're to come with us for drinks," Erwin informed Levi. He sounded dead-serious. Of course he was, Levi thought, Erwin couldn't tell a joke to save his life.

"I'm off-duty," Levi said flatly.

"I'm dedicated to this cause. Either you come willingly or I knock you out and proudly parade you through the town square over my shoulder."

"I'll take the second option," Levi remarked drily, "I could use a nap before dealing with your intoxicated asses." Levi was keenly aware of who "us" entailed.

Erwin hummed, deep blue eyes expressing his faint amusement.

"It'd be a little pathetic, even for you," the man said keenly, "to celebrate another birthday sulking in the corner alone."

"Alone and sulking is the pinnacle of my celebration," Levi replied. As much as he had grown to respect and trust Erwin over the years, the time they spent together outside of official duties had been rather minimal. And now, after the day's earlier fiasco, Levi couldn't help but feel that a certain line had been crossed in his and Erwin's relationship. It left him feeling a little awkward around the man.

"Well," Erwin tried a different approach, "then join us to mark the return from the successful expedition."

Levi paused.

Although on record it had been the shortest expedition, it was, in part, also the most successful. They suffered no casualties, although a man did lose a leg, and they promptly learned that exploring in the winter, given both the state of their current technology and horse breeds, would be impossible. The cold had wreaked havoc on the gear and gas supply. Even unused blades became chipped and cracked by the journey's return. Although only a startling few Titans were encountered, the couple that were had moved exceedingly erratically- oscillating between sudden bursts of speedy movements to sluggish crawls.

And there was something about seeing red hot human blood splattered across the crisp white snow that sent everyone's mind reeling. The sight of blood upon dirt and filth was mundane, but seeing it ruin purity was too much to bear.

For the first time, and perhaps, the last time, Erwin's report was going to be longer than the list of the deceased.

"Fine," Levi relented.

"Wonderful," Erwin declared with a low hum and gave Levi's shoulder a strong squeeze; had the shorter man's strength been any less, he would've surely tumbled to the side.

The pair left the cemetery without a single glance over their shoulders.

—-

With the ease most people stepped over a curb, Hange vaulted themselves over the bar table. With swift, fluid motions, they glided around the startled waitress and with a playful wink and wicked gleam in their eye, they steadied both the young woman and the drinks that rattled on her tray.

"Sorry 'bout that," Hange hummed with a smile, slipping their hand from the waitress' waist.

Levi wearily sipped his drink.

"It- It's okay," the woman told Hange with a nervous smile and flushed cheeks before sailing off to serve her orders around the crowded pub. At Levi's side sat Nanaba, Mike and Erwin, discussing their upcoming holiday plans.

Hange turned to the extensive arrangement of glistening liquor bottles lining the shelves, their back to Levi. Their long fingers languidly skimmed over the countless options, as they subtly swayed their shoulders and bobbed their head to the heat of the low tempo music. Watching glimpses of Hange's reflection dancing off the liquor bottles, Levi could see Hange mouthing each word the old man at the corner sang.

He knew the birthday nonsense was their idea. He just knew.

The vest that Hange had so carelessly tossed aside earlier that night now hung upon the clothing hook closest to Levi's legs.

"Hange," Erwin spoke up. Hange tilted their head back.

Erwin raised his empty glass before sliding it down the bar table. It stopped before Levi, but he didn't touch it. "Another scotch?" Hange asked as their fingers wrapped around the same side Erwin's mouth had been. It had been long since the pub's bartender learned to relinquish his job the instant Hange Zoe stepped through the door. Hange let him keep the tips, of course.

They stood before Levi but faced Erwin. The top three buttons of their white shirt were open and their black tie hung low and half-undone around their neck. Although their face didn't flush like Levi's when they drank, the tips of their ears had grown pink.

The bushy-browed Squad Leader nodded, just as Mike gulped down the remainder of his own drink and asked Hange for another refill as well.

Nanaba and Levi exchanged wearily glances. For as cool and level-headed the two of the tall-ass blond bastards were out on the field, a little downtime and liquor turned them into meatheaded competitive idiots. While Nanaba told the two men they should start cutting down for the night, Hange's eyes glinted devilishly. The next round of drinks they served were decidedly stronger than before- as evident by the sour expressions Erwin and Mike tried (and failed) to hide from each other.

"Unbelievable," Nanaba exhaled and looked away from the festering storm of testosterone. Hange rested their hip against the bar, the profile of their face and figure before Levi, and folded their arms.

"Ah, come on, Nana. They deserve the chance to be a little stupid," Hange said with a smile. They tilted their head to look at Levi. "So do you, birthday boy," Hange added.

Levi's expression didn't change. He took another small sip of his drink. "This is a stupid as I get."

"How abysmal." Hange clicked their tongue and pushed off from the bar. "Should I give you a good wack, with a good sturdy bottle, to rattle your brains a little then?"

Hange stepped back to the display and asked Levi if he had a preference for the contents in the bottle they would hit him with.

"Water, Hange," Levi growled in a warning tone. He was still nursing his first drink of the night and would prefer there wouldn't be a second.

In their reflection, Levi could see Hange pout. But, with a sigh, they said, "Okay, okay, lightweight."

Nanaba smiled at the exchange. Then, after a moment of visible hesitation, she slowly asked, "So… um, how old are you, Levi?" They were out drinking in celebration of his birthday, but no one had yet mentioned his age.

"Ah, come on, Nanaba. You know it's rude to ask a fair maid their age," Hange said lightly, pouring honey-gold liquid over large squares of ice.

Nanaba looked sheepish. "I know, I know, but we're out celebrating and I just thought—"

"I bet I can sniff it out," Mike suddenly declared, poking his head and giant nose into the conversation. Nanaba leaned away sharply from the man who practically rested his chin upon her shoulder.

"P-Personal space, Mike!" Nanaba exhaled sharply. Mike blinked at her, his hand comfortably resting at the edge of her stool, by her ass. "What? Want me to lean in closer?" Mike asked innocently, his words coming out only slightly slurred. Nanaba's cheeks began to color, but she scowled and promptly put both hands on Mike's face to push him an arms-length away. There was a hint of a smile at her lips.

Levi, Hange and Erwin exchanged telling glances. The effort Nanaba and Mike went through to conceal their private relationship was admirable, but ultimately useless.

Hange reached for the remainder of Mike's drink and downed it in an expert swing, effectively cutting the man off for the rest of the night.

Then, Hange's hand brushed against Levi's arm as they set their own drink before him. Hange rested an elbow on the bar top and set their chin in the palm of their hand. Levi looked at them. Positioned this way, with their shirt unbuttoned and tie hanging low, Levi could see the long curve of Hange's neck, the peek of their collarbone, the plunge of their chest and the line of bruises from the ODM straps that would run across it.

"I also don't know," Hange murmured quietly, as if in confession. Their eyes settled on Levi's.

"Know what?"

"How old you are."

Levi finished his drink and set the empty glass near Hange's full one. "Neither do I," he said wearily.

Hange's tipsy gaze flickered over him. Their lips twitched up after a moment. "Ah, just like me..." Hange raised the glass, swirling the liquid around.

Levi watched them drink. He raised his brows. "We marked your 27th three months ago," he deadpanned.

Erwin must've overheard them, for he chuckled.

"Mm, yeah, well…" Hange glanced at their Squad Leader with a sheepish smile, "That's just an estimate. I was desperate to get into the military, so I wrote down some random year that would make me just old enough."

Levi hadn't known that. "And it worked?" he asked incredulously. Mike and Nanaba paused their poorly disguised flirtation to pay attention to Levi and Hange's conversation now.

Hange shrugged and picked up the glass that sat between them and Levi. "I guess I was tall enough to make it believable," they hummed innocently.

Levi narrowed his eyes at them. Hange met his gaze with a gleeful expression.

"So you don't remember how old you really were?" Nanaba asked curiously. Hange looked away from Levi.

"I don't think I ever really knew, no one told me," Hange said with their usual light-heartedness, "But I had the sense to guess I wasn't anywhere close to twelve."

"Unlike Levi," Erwin spoke up, "who has the courtesy to put a question mark for the last digit of his birth year, you-" Erwin lifted one accusatory finger from his glass and angled it in Hange's direction, "didn't even bother to remember the year you put. There's a different one on each document, which makes my paperwork a living hell."

Hange's grin grew wider, their whiskey colored eyes shining devilishly. They didn't look the least bit ashamed.

Drunk Mike slapped the table with startling force. "So let's come up with a birthday for you both!" he declared loudly. Nanaba pinched his arm and told him to quiet down. Drunk Erwin promptly slammed his hand down on the table in the same manner, putting in obvious effort to have his slap strike louder than Mike's. "I like the sound of that!"

With his distaste written all over his face, Levi eyed the loud giants before he turned back to Hange, ready to pry further into their story. For as good as Hange was at coming up with answers to difficult questions, Hange was a master at dodging questions about their own personal life. This had been a rare moment when they had volunteered information. But, when he faced the other side of the bar, he saw only the display of liquor bottles staring back at him. Levi frowned. A moment later, he spotted Hange at the other end of the bar, making the next round of orders while the pretty waitress hovered at their side, relaying orders.

Fucking abysmal manners, Levi thought to himself as he began to drink from the glass Hange had left behind, Leaving a conversation they themself started...

A moment later, Erwin asked Levi, "You remember your birthdate as December 25th, do you remember if the year was the 810s or beginning 820s?"

Levi shook his head, but then paused. "I remember people being surprised at my age, thinking I was much younger than I was. So, 810s most likely."

Mike leaned over Nanaba yet again, wiggling his nose. "I can sniff it out of you. Let me," he requested again, eyes shining with drunk vigor.

Briefly, Levi's eyes flickered over to the view of Hange's back once more. Levi took a swing of his drink. "That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard, Zacharias," Levi growled. "Have you been snorting your liquor?"

Mike's eyes flashed. "I can smell a Titan from kilometers away," he falsely boasted. "So give me your damn wrist and let me sniff your age out already!"

"My wrist?"

Mike scowled. "I have to smell something!" Nanaba was almost squished against Levi from how much she was leaning away from Mike, both her hands pressing back against his chest.

"I thought you said you could smell a Titan from kilometers away!" Levi snapped.

"You're not exactly a Titan!"

"Tch."

Erwin and Nanaba did a poor job stifling their laughs.

"Humor him," Erwin encouraged Levi. Levi hesitated, his resolve beginning to falter. "I don't want his dirty ass congested nose anywhere near me."

"I'm never congested!" Mike snapped hotly, looking ready to spring into a fight to defend the slight in his nose's name.

What a fucking headache. This is why Levi hated drinking. It mutated everyone into imbeciles, no different from Underground vermin.

But before the bickering could escalate, a familiar figure returned. Their warm long fingers curled around Levi's wrist. With striking speed, the sole button on Levi's cuff was undone. Hange ran Levi's sleeve up his arm without sparing his surprised face a single glance.

Nanaba let out a low whistle. "You do that so quickly, Hange," she hummed coily. Hange cast Nanaba a telling expression. Levi's lack of amusement was evident.

"Four-Eyes, what the hell are you doi- Oi!" Levi grunted as Hange jerked him to the side, shoving his bare forearm right under Mike's nose.

With a smile, Erwin watched the tipsy antics of humanity's strongest soldiers.

The corner of Levi's lips curled deeply down as he felt the tickle of Mike's mustache against his skin. If Hange hadn't been squeezing his wrist so tightly, he would've whipped his arm away. Mike scowled. "This shit just reeks of Hange," he complained, shoulders slumping.

"Let him go, Hange," Erwin said and Hange obeyed, their touch slipping away. Reluctantly, for the sake of his invested comrades, Levi kept his arm where it was and let Mike try again.

Out of the corner of his eyes, Levi watched Hange lean in rather unnecessarily close to the second-highest ranking man in the Survey Corps and whisper in his ear. Erwin's lips twitched up and he turned his head, whispering back to Hange an update of what they missed. Levi had been so focused on picking up what words they were exchanging, that he had forgotten all about Mike snorting his arm until the damn bastard suddenly sneezed, loudly, all over Levi.

His fucking spit sprinkled Levi's exposed skin.

Levi yanked his arm away as if he had been shot.

"Fucking disgusting," Levi fumed just as Hange and Nanaba burst out laughing.

"You're a deadman, Mike," Erwin mused as he patted his old friend on the back.

The night continued with Nanaba having to pry a swearing Levi from Mike's collar, Mike and Erwin arm wrestling and breaking a table, the poor waitress acquiring a permanent blush thanks to three overly flirtatious Survey Corps officers, and the challenge to sneak in as many lines of the Happy Birthday song as possible before Levi hovered a butterknife threateningly at the singer's throat.

A/N: i have. no idea. how to write. Erwin :) he always came off as such a figure... almost just a trope? the handsome charismatic leader with the dark secret that inspires all those around him.. it was hard for me to feel him out as human? but i did my best, and i think putting him in regular situations- like drinking with friends at a bar- really helped. anyway! big thank u for reading. can't wait to post the drunken antics of a certain pair next ~~~~