Author's epistle: Here is the third chapter! Thank you so much to those of you who have been reading and reviewing! I really appreciate all the feedback! Also, I will be giving a short preview of my next story at the end of this story. It will be solely Kataang-focused!
Zuko didn't know how long he'd been sleeping, but he awoke to a gentle hand stroking his hair. He blinked his eyes open and smiled as his vision cleared and Mai's lovely face came into focus.
"I really like that you've let your hair grow out," she remarked, carding her fingers through the long strands. "It looks good."
"Well, Uncle kept telling me that a Fire Lord needs enough hair to make a respectable topknot," said Zuko, yawning as he sat up. "I'm glad you like it," he added almost shyly.
Mai gave him one of her rare, genuine smiles, which made Zuko's stomach do flip-flops. Looking at her, he was again struck by how fortunate he was to have someone like Mai in his life. She was so smart and so strong and so incredibly beautiful. His mind lingered on the 'beautiful' aspect in that list as he stared at her. Mai's long, black hair was in an intricate series of buns at the back of her head. The hairstyle showed off her swan-like neck and lean body. She was very pale and had often mentioned burning rather than tanning in the sun, but she had a burnished glow to her skin which was accented by the white sundress she wore.
To Zuko, she looked like a goddess.
"You missed lunch," said Mai, eyeing him closely. "Is everything okay? Toph said you weren't feeling good. Something about Komodo sausage rolls?"
"I think she misunderstood," Zuko muttered. "I'm fine. I was just … tired."
Mai was still staring at him. "Tired? Zuko, I don't think you've moved more than a few meters from the beach house. How can you be tired already? You've been acting strange almost since we got here. Is everything all right?"
"Sure. It's just … you know … the sun. It's … hot," mumbled Zuko, not able to meet her eyes. "Being a firebender doesn't mean you can't get, um, overheated."
"Really?" Mai's voice was cool. "I thought that's exactly what it meant."
Zuko had to work hard to not cringe. The words hit him almost like the shuriken that Mai liked to throw.
"I'm just a little fatigued, that's all. I'll be out for dinner to be the good host and everything. Really, I'm fine."
He felt Mai's eyes probing him briefly. She then shrugged slightly and then got up from the bed.
"If you say so. The others are playing some earthbending game out on the beach," she said laconically. "Aang, Toph and Haru are the captains, and Haru's team was short a person, though I think they were asking someone on the beach to join. I wanted to check on you, but since you're so obviously fine, maybe I'll ask if I can swap out on Haru's team."
Zuko watched her in dismay. Her tone didn't fool him. She was confused and hurt. Suddenly, he was thrust back in time nearly four years, right after the Harmony Restoration movement disaster. He was back in the royal palace, watching Mai break up with him because he'd not told her that he'd been meeting with his father. Because he hadn't confided in her.
He bounded from the bed and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder right before she reached the door.
"I'm not okay. Not really. I'm sorry that I told you I was."
Zuko took a deep breath. "Something happened. Something embarrassing. Something that's touched on my honor."
Mai turned around to face him. "On your honor? Zuko please tell me you haven't been talking with your insane father again? I'd heard he'd been trying to write to you."
"And I have his scrolls burned before they get anywhere near the palace," said Zuko, through tight lips. "I promise you, my days of seeking his advice are over."
Mai didn't answer him, but he saw her eyes soften in response. Zuko let out a silent breath and led her back to the bed where they sat on the edge side by side.
"Tell me what happened," she said quietly.
Zuko took another deep breath. He remembered the disastrous conversation he had with Toph. He felt that it was probably best to leave that out, especially considering Toph's … demonstration. It wasn't really relevant.
Well, not much.
"Do you remember when I told you that Yohei, the caretaker here, sent me a messenger hawk saying that with high season on, he's been having to chase kids fishing for sea slugs out of that little gully in the back?"
Mai slowly nodded. "You said he told you that a kid cut his foot badly on a rock, and another one nearly knocked himself out falling out of one of the trees."
"Right. Well, Yohei wanted to know if I could send a detachment of guards to help him patrol, at least during high season. He was afraid of someone getting really hurt. Or worse. I planned to discuss it with Tetsuya, the head of my traveling guard, while we were here."
He paused to gather himself, then went on.
"With all of the activity yesterday with everyone arriving, it slipped my mind. Then right before we were going to sit down to dinner, I heard splashing coming from the lagoon. Tetsuya and his people were already having their dinner. They'd worked hard making sure everything was secure in the beach house and Aang and I weren't going to have a bunch of people pressing in on us, so I didn't want to disturb them. I figured it was kids and maybe a visit from the Fire Lord would make an impression … even if I was in shorts and sandals."
A smile tugged at Mai's lips. "And did it?"
"No." Zuko paused again. "Because it wasn't kids back there. It was Katara."
A small frown marred Mai's forehead. "Was she with Aang?"
"No, Aang was on the beach with everyone else," said Zuko. "Katara was alone. She was waterbending."
"All right …" Mai squinted at him. "So Katara was back there. Someone who would be just fine in the water. No issue. Right?"
"Wrong. Big issue." Zuko swallowed hard. Swallowed hard again. "She … she was half-naked."
Mai went very still. "Which half?"
"The top half," he muttered. "She didn't have on anything. I saw her … chest area. Uncovered."
Mai was silent for a long, long moment.
"You saw her boobs, in other words," she said in a flat voice.
Zuko frowned. Was 'boobs' just the accepted slang for breasts now? It made him shudder to think that his Uncle Iroh might know the answer to that question.
"Yes. I saw her boobs," he said clearly. "It was only for a few seconds. When I realized what was happening, I left. Quickly."
"Did she see you?"
"No." He shook his head. "The sun was starting to go down and there are trees along the walkway to the back. I was probably in shadow. And I didn't make any noise when I went away."
They sat together in silence for a few moments. Zuko was happy to note that Mai wasn't moving. She seemed lost in thought, but she wasn't attempting to leave.
"All right," she finally said, in a quiet voice. "How exactly does this situation touch on your honor?"
"Well, I saw a friend … like that." Zuko stuttered a little. "And not just a friend, the Avatar's girlfriend. Aang's girlfriend."
"This hadn't happened before?"
"What? No!" Zuko almost yelped. "Why would you think it had?"
She shrugged. "You were with them during the war. You talked about having to sleep outside in tents at times and wash up in streams and lakes. I thought that maybe it might have been possible …"
"No." Zuko quickly shook his head. "Never. We always tried to keep things separate. Girls over here. Guys over there." He gestured widely with his hands. "And when we had to wash up together because there was no other choice, we guys cleaned up in our loincloths. The girls kept their bindings on."
"Let me understand this: Your issue is that you saw Katara's boobs … and she's Aang's girlfriend. So it would have been okay if it had been someone else's boobs?"
"No, of course not!" Zuko felt his face blaze red. "I didn't want to see those or anybody else's at all. But I did see Katara's, and now I have to deal with the fact that I saw them."
"Is that why you've been in here so much? Alone?" Mai gave the bed a significant glance. "You've been 'dealing' with it?"
It took Zuko a half-second to understand what Mai was getting at, and for a moment he couldn't breathe.
"No! Mai, it's nothing like that. I …"
"Zuko, it's normal." Mai sounded nonchalant, but she wasn't looking at him. "Let's not pretend Katara isn't beautiful. I'm sure she has amazing boobs, and I suppose … it wouldn't be your fault if you got turned on by them."
"I didn't notice her b … chest."
Zuko stared at Mai when she turned toward him with a slightly disbelieving look.
"I didn't. Mai, it's never been like that with me and Katara. I've never thought of her as anything more than a friend."
"Really? Azula seemed to think otherwise."
Zuko's stomach dropped. Whenever his sister entered the conversation, it was never a good sign.
"She wrote to me from that first asylum you put her in," said Mai, pulling at the light quilt that covered the bed. "I thought she was being rehabilitated, so I accepted her letters for a while."
"What did she say?" Zuko braced himself for the worst.
"That you looked sad during the time when you and she were searching for your mother," said Mai, "because Katara and the Avatar were all over each other, and you were constantly wishing she was with you instead."
Zuko closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He felt the itch in his palms that usually preceded him blasting something with his firebending and he breathed in and out shallowly until he was sure he had control.
Azula had been dealt a bad hand in life, this princess who had been said to have been "born lucky." She'd suffered many of the same things he had suffered under their father and their mother's absence. She'd had the same weight of expectations thrust upon her, maybe even more so as she was a prodigy like the man for whom she'd been named. Despite everything, Zuko had not wanted to completely harden his heart toward her, not even when Azula had tried to harm their half-sister Ziyi, Mai's little brother Tom-Tom and other children of prominent Fire Nation citizens.
But hearing the hurt that Mai was trying to mask in her voice, Zuko knew he had to give up the idea of reconciling with Azula. She was damaged, it seemed, beyond repair. She'd gleefully lied to a person who she'd called a friend. Lied to her and deliberately hurt her just because she could.
Zuko opened his eyes. He took Mai's hands in his and silently stared into her eyes as he thought about what he was going to say.
"Azula was lying to you," he said in a quietly serious voice. "I've never wanted Katara. I would have been honest with you if I'd ever felt anything for her. I wouldn't have left it for Azula to taunt you with something like that. I love you too much."
He saw faint color bloom in Mai's cheeks. Her fingers tightened around his.
"Katara is beautiful, and great, and a lot of other things. But we're friends. Seeing her like I did yesterday was like if I'd walked in on Azula in the baths." Zuko shuddered slightly. "When I saw her, I didn't drool or get hard or want to marry her. I just wanted to get away as fast as possible. I don't want to see anyone but you like that. Mr. Happy is only interested in you, Mai. You have to believe me."
She looked at him askance. "Mr. Happy?"
Reluctantly, Zuko told her of his talk with Toph, and Toph's … demonstration. He still couldn't quite believe she'd done that. It seemed so surreal, as if it had happened to someone else.
While Mai digested it all, Zuko waited in tense silence. She sighed almost beneath her breath and regarded him seriously from beneath her black fringe.
"I'm going to ignore the thing with Toph, because it's exactly something she would find to be no big deal, and for her I guess it wasn't. She probably wanted you to feel less freaked out about Katara. Which is sweet, in a very messed-up kind of way ... which is pretty standard for Toph," Mai said, sounding weary. "As far as the thing with Katara, why are you shutting yourself away as if you've done something wrong? It was an accident. It's not like you went back there knowing she wasn't dressed and were being a pervert. It could have happened to anybody."
"Right, but it happened to me. To us. Me and Katara. That makes it a problem. A big one."
"But why?" Her amber eyes were puzzled. "It's embarrassing, yes, but why are you treating it like some sort of disaster?"
"Because it has the potential to turn into one." Zuko raked his hands through his long hair. "I've told you about that stupid play about the Avatar the Ember Island Players put on that one year? During the war?"
Mai's forehead creased again. "Wait, is this the one where your father beats Aang and rules the entire world?"
"That's the one," he said grimly. "That wasn't the only stupid thing about it. It sort of implied that Katara and I were a thing … and she and Aang were just friends."
"Oh. Right. I'd forgotten that part." Her voice had gone colorless again. "I think you left it out the first time you told me about it."
"Mai, it was a stupid play written by people who thought my father was the best thing that ever happened to the Fire Nation and that of course the 'manly man' sprung from his loins should get to bang the overemotional Water Tribe girl while the last Air Nomad just sort of stood there."
"This play sounds horrible."
"It was. And it caused problems between Aang and Katara for a while."
"How?" Mai gave him a sideways glance. "It was a stupid play. None of it was real."
"No." Zuko scowled. "But how would you feel seeing yourself ridiculed for laughs and the person you wanted a relationship with saying they saw you only as a brother? Uh, sister."
"I'd probably demand a refund."
Zuko half-smiled. "We probably should have left at intermission. My point is, I don't want to bring up bad memories of that time. Of course the play was a bunch of elephant rat shit, but I don't want Aang hearing about what happened yesterday, and remembering the weirdness that play caused, and then going all Avatar State."
"Zuko, now you're being ridiculous." Her blunt voice carried a hint of exasperation. "Aang's not a little boy with a crush anymore. He's nearly a grown man, and he Katara have been together for years. What happened with you seeing Katara that way was an accident. It should not cause him to go on a destructive rampage."
Zuko thought about Toph classifying it in that same manner and he eyed Mai narrowly.
"Okay, let me ask you something. Suppose this happened, but instead of me and Katara, it was you and Aang. And he didn't have a loincloth on and you were able to see his … manhood."
"His manhood?" She raised a brow.
"Fine! His dick! His cock! His wang! His peen! His milkb …" He fell into silence.
"Milk what?"
Zuko realized he had no idea how to finish that word.
"Nevermind. Anyway, let's suppose that happened. You wouldn't feel weird about it?"
"Sure I would. For an hour. Maybe an hour and a half." She studied him. "Just like you don't want Katara sexually, I don't want Aang that way, either. Even the idea that I was seeing the Avatar's dick would only be a passing thought."
Zuko blinked at that last statement. "Good to know. I wonder how that would stack up in general public against the seeing the Fire Lord's dick," he muttered.
She shot him a look that let him know he probably should stop wise-cracking. Or else.
"You need to tell Katara you saw her," continued Mai. "She should know that anybody might stumble back there and get a show. She'll be embarrassed, but I doubt she's going to make a huge deal of it or encase you in ice or something. And if Aang finds out, I'm sure he's not going to be jumping up and down in glee, but I highly doubt he's going to go into the Avatar State and destroy the island because you saw his girlfriend's tits for a few seconds."
Zuko's shoulders rounded. "Okay, probably not. But things will be weird between us probably for more than an hour. And I'm talking about Katara and Aang, here. I don't want that. I have so many servants and sycophants ... but only a few real friends. They're at the top of the list."
"And that's why you'll work it out," said Mai. "This isn't an incident that could ruin the friendships you've built with Katara and Aang. They wouldn't let it happen, just like you won't let it happen. ...Right? Because all of you are smarter than that." She stared hard at him.
Zuko opened his mouth and closed it again as the wisdom of her words hit him like one of his uncle's potent tea blends. He stared at her lips, wanting suddenly to crush them to his.
He brought his eyes up to hers and grinned.
"Has anyone told you today how brilliant you are?"
"No, but the day's not over. There's still some sunlight left."
She gently stroked the puckered flesh of his scar. "Zuko, seriously, stop stressing. It's going to be okay. You're not going to lose your friends over an honest mistake."
He closed his eyes against her touch, leaning into it. "I'm glad. But I'm gladder that I'm not going to lose you over this."
"Well, that wasn't going to happen unless you said you thought Katara's boobs were nicer than mine. Or Toph's for that matter."
Even though he heard the teasing in her tone, Zuko's eyes opened in alarm.
"Mai, seriously, I …"
She stood up and stood before him, a small smile playing on her lips.
"Yeah, yeah, I know. You 'barely' saw them. Maybe I need to remind you what mine look like? Just for the sake of argument."
Zuko just sat in stunned anticipation as Mai did something at the back of her neck and her white sundress whispered to the floor. She did the same motion at the back of her head and the buns unraveled. Her hair tumbled into a mass of black silk that flowed to her waist.
Other than her sandals, she was sleekly naked. Zuko stared hungrily from the triangle of black hair between her thighs, up the flat tummy and to where his attention was commanding him. He barely noticed the tan lines bracketed much of Mai's body. He was wholly fascinated by the small, teardrop-shaped breasts that sat proudly, slightly uplifted. Her nipples were dark, and interestingly, her aerolae a bit lighter, almost a brownish-pink. It was an arresting sight.
Zuko stood up and bit back a groan. "Mr. Happy" was definitely taking notice.
"No contest," he breathed, ghosting his fingers over the firm flesh. "You have the most amazing breasts I've ever seen. Or touched." He leaned down and licked one of her nipples to hardness. "Or tasted …"
He could feel her trembling.
"Zuko …"
"Maybe we should stop," he murmured, glancing up at her before slowly circling the other nipple with the stiff tip of his tongue. "Didn't you say something about wanting to go join Haru's game or something?"
"Zuko, if you don't get out of those clothes right now …"
"Yes, Mai," he said, humbly, hiding the delighted smile on his face by bowing deeply to her at the same time he eagerly worked at the fastenings of his shorts.