Chapter 3
By the time Tech had gotten himself presentable, the dinner plans still had not been decided upon. As he entered the living room, an argument had broken out between Ace and Lexi, with Duck, Rev and Slam standing on the side, waiting for some sort of decision to be reached.
"All I'm saying is that it's been forever since we went out somewhere nice, and this place seems really good!" Lexi said.
"Lex, we're super heroes. We can't just go out to some place on a whim because we feel like it. Danger could strike at any moment!" Ace argued.
"Danger hasn't struck in forever! We spend most of our time preparing for danger! Every time we think there's danger the police have it under control by the time we arrive!"
"I would hardly call six months forever. Besides, who knows when the next villain will strike! Someone could be out there plotting our destruction right now!"
They both made fair points. It was hard to believe it had been six months since the last major attack on the city. Since then, everything seemed to calm down for the most part. They were so used to rushing into action that at first it was difficult not having much to do. Over time, however, each of them grew to appreciate how relaxed things had become. With the looming shadow of the Loonatics hanging over the city, most street crime had slowed down considerably, and most people who would have considered resorting to crime decided it would be best to not risk it. The only one who had trouble accepting all of this was Ace. It was true that a threat could strike at any moment, but Zadavia was bound to warn them if that was the case.
"Look" Ace began, "If yous wants ta go out and put da city at risk, then I can't stop ya. I'll warn ya now though, staying in a restaurant like that means you'll practically be begging for the attention of da press." Ace had very strict rules about how they interacted with the public, and number one was to avoid the press and paparazzi as much as possible. On social media they could at least control what they said and how they said it, but when the press was around, there was no guarantee that they wouldn't resort to capturing them at their worst and start ruining their reputation, just to make a cheap buck on a clickbait article. This meant being careful when going out in public, and to not draw attention to oneself. It especially meant not going to a fancy restaurant where a mob of photographers would have the chance to swarm outside. Of course, none of them obeyed these rules as strictly as Ace did. For instance, Duck had been extensively interviewed multiple times, despite Ace's apprehensions.
"If you really want to stay cooped up in here then that's fine, but at the very least I'm going to enjoy myself" Lexi folded her arms in indignation.
"Well then it's settled, are we going or what?" Duck asked.
"Where are we going?" Tech stepped forward, making his presence known. Rev couldn't help but to look up at him. Before, the way his fur was all matted down was so raw, so sexual, but here he appeared very different. His fur was so fluffy, it was simply adorable. Rev could only imagine that hugging him would be like embracing an intelligent pillow. Tech glanced over in his direction. At the sight of possible eye contact, Rev quickly looked over to Lexi and Ace, pretending like he didn't notice.
Lexi pulled out a pamphlet, "It's some new restaurant which opened up downtown" she handed it to Tech. The pamphlet was complete with a menu and photos of the place.
"La Merde?" Tech read the name of the restaurant inquisitively.
"Doesn't it sound so elegant?" Lexi clasped her hands together in excitement, "It's French, I wonder what it means?"
"Sounds… nice" Tech handed the pamphlet back to Lexi, "I don't know if I'm dressed for something so fancy though" He was dressed very casually, not as much as he was in the lab, but definitely not something someone would wear for a special occasion.
"What your wearing is fine" Lexi insisted.
"Listen, if you all do plan to go to this restaurant-"
"We are" the rest of the Loonatics said in unison, with the exception of Slam, who worded the same sentiment via his usual pattern of grunts.
"All I'm saying is, if you are going out then, bring me something back. Also, I need at least one of you to hang around here with me, just in case something really does come up" Ace said. The group let out a collective sigh.
"Should we do rock, paper, scissors for it?" Rev suggested.
"Why is this even a matter of debate? Slam's too big for this place anyway, he should be the one who stays behind!" Duck groaned. This quickly elicited a glare from Slam. "That is to say, only if you want to" he quickly back peddled. Lexi opened up the pamphlet, looking at the different pictures available.
"I hate to say it, but Duck might be right" she said reluctantly, "Look at the size of these booths; based on the size of the people in the photo, Slam wouldn't be able to fit in." Slam looked down crestfallen.
"That settles it then. It's me, Lexi, Rev and Tech" Duck pointed to each one of them as he said their name. Rev and Tech looked at each other. They were both able to read a level of concern in the other, but there was still some uncertainty between the two of them as to how serious the other was.
"Remember to keep ya ringers on in case we need to contact you" Ace waved goodbye, still displeased that they were going out instead of staying behind in case of emergency.
"Are we taking the jet packs?" Duck asked.
"Ug, no. That's such a rugged way to travel. Don't we have anything a bit higher class?" Lexi turned to Tech.
"I think I have just the thing."
Before they knew it, they had arrived at La Merde. Tech had driven them over in a fairly lush jet, suitable for civilian travel, but definitely not the type of thing they would take on missions. They managed to find a parking lot just a few blocks away from their destination. They had been fairly fortunate while walking through downtown Acmetropolis, only running into a few people wanting autographs, but so far no one from the press had tried to approach them. It wasn't as if their arrival was anticipated or anything, it was just the restaurant they chose to have dinner at. Never the less, each of them knew a crowd was inevitable. It was times like these they wished they had secret identities to fall back on.
La Merde was a relatively small, yet never the less stylish, place on a street corner. When they walked in, there were a few people, but it wasn't too crowded. A waiter soon approached them, and found them a table. It seemed clear to them that the waiter recognized who they were, as apparent from the excitement he was barely holding in.
"If anything is to your dissatisfaction then please let me know" the waiter noted.
"Thank you" said Lexi.
"And if you need anything, anything at all please let me know" the waiter continued.
"Ok" said Duck.
"And if anyone is bothering you then-"
"You're the one bothering us!" Tech scoffed. The waiter immediately stopped talking, bowed slightly, and shuffled away. After a brief moment of silence, the four of them burst out laughing. Tech smiled, looking over at Rev. It was a relief to see him happy, if only for a moment. They hadn't talked much on the way over.
"Look at us, going out to a fancy restaurant like this. It's pretty adult" Lexi noted.
"It's not that adult" Duck retorted as an attempt to sound superior.
"It's pretty adult compared to what we usually do" Lexi said.
"Yeah, most of the time we're either fighting bad guys, hanging around the tower, or preparing to fight bad guys while hanging around the tower" Rev said.
"You saying that rewiring a micro blaster isn't your idea of an adult activity?" Tech quipped sarcastically.
"Not particularly" Rev blushed, preceding to hide his face behind a menu. This was going to be harder than he thought. He had hoped that having Duck and Lexi there would defuse some of the tension he was feeling, but it was no use. He couldn't just hide behind his menu the entire meal; he would need to face Tech eventually. Tech on the other hand wasn't feeling much better. He had hoped that whatever awkwardness had occurred in the lab would be short lived, but clearly Rev still felt the same. If only he had taken Rev aside so they could at least sort this out. He didn't want to have this conversation with Lexi and Duck right there. Well, mostly Duck.
"Yeesh, not a lot to choose from on this menu" Duck remarked.
"What is here is supposed to be very high quality" Lexi said.
"Well would it kill them to cut down on the pasta? I'm trying to get full not fat" Duck snarked.
Suddenly from over Tech's shoulder, Rev saw something. It was someone on a cell phone. They glanced over nervously for a moment, seemingly looking right at their table, before going back to their call.
"Heads up, someone on a cell phone looking right at us" Rev said to the others. This wasn't anything new. The others already understood what Rev was hinting at. Whenever they saw someone like that, it meant they were calling the papers. A lot of newspapers and tabloids tended to offer up money to anyone who could spot a story for them. Once someone called them up, a reporter was sent to the scene with some cash to pay said person on the spot. The Loonatics were a living breathing news story. Wherever they went, it usually meant something news worthy. Couple this with the fact that Ace didn't like them doing interviews, and any information on them was a goldmine to the public.
"So soon? We haven't even ordered our food yet" Tech sighed.
"It's only natural when you're as famous as I am to draw the public's attention" Duck smirked. The waiter soon returned.
"Can I take your order or do you need more time?"
"We'll all just take whatever's quickest" Lexi sighed. They handed the waiter their menus.
"Except for me, I'll have the pasta course" Duck said. Lexi gave him an annoyed look.
"Seriously?"
"What? I've been told that all the food is very good!"
"Is there anything wrong? If so, you can just tell me" The waiter's brow was dripping beads of sweat.
"It's nothing to do with the restaurant, it's just that the press will probably be here any minute, and it's impossible to relax with them around" Lexi sighed.
"Wait a minute" the waiter stammered, "I only just called them a minute ago, how did you know?" They all looked to the waiter, surprised.
"We weren't talking about you; we were talking about that lady over there" Rev pointed to the person who he saw call in. Everyone looked to the woman.
"I wasn't going to call in, but then I saw that man over there calling in and so I figured I would get some money if they were coming anyway" The woman blurted out, pointing to a man at the other side of the room. Everyone then looked over to the man.
"I wasn't gonna call in either" said the man, "But then I saw my bus boy call in and I figured if he was making a quick buck then so should I."
"OK, ok. Hold on just a second" Lexi stood up, "How many people in this restaurant called in, reporting on us?" At least one person at every table, along with all the employees in the restaurant proceeded to raise their hands.
"Well, this ain't good" Rev said nervously.
"Wait a minute" Tech looked towards the waiter, "when you call in a story, a news source won't accept the same story by two different people, right?"
The waiter nodded, "That's right sir, it's first come first serve. Once someone calls in to a specific news outlet, they won't accept any other reports on that same story in that same location."
"So that means everyone in this restaurant must have called a different news source" Tech deduced.
"Yes, that would seem likely" the waiter concurred.
"You do realize that means you have a huge swarm of reporters heading this way right now, don't you? I mean, each news outlet is bound to send out a few people for each call they get."
For a brief moment the waiter was silent. He looked around the room, looking at how many customers there were, along with silently tallying up all of the employees. Then quite suddenly, he let out a small "Dear God" before running to the front doors and locking them shut.
"Hey buddy, how the heck are we supposed to get out of here?" one of the customers shouted.
"That's not what we have to worry about now!" the waiter exclaimed in a panic, "They'll be here soon!" It was already happening. Swarms of reporters with flashing cameras and microphones began suctioning onto the windows. Flashes of light began to fill the room, like a strobe at a disco. Even through the glass, their incessant questions were loud and clear. Their words and phrases blended together, making it difficult to decipher one question from the next.
"IsittruethattheLoonaticsareretiringWehaven'tyouseenoutlatelydoesthismeantheLoonaticsaregoingunderWhatdoyouhavetosaytothecitizenswhothinkwenolongerneedtheLoonaticsWhyareyouheretonightIsthereacrimeinprogressWhatdoyoudoinyourfreetimeWhatareyouorderingfordinnerWhydidyoucomehereWhatdoyouhavetosayabouttherumorscirculatingthatyouusedrugsAreAceBunnyandLexiBunnyacoupleoraretheyrelatedDoesyourfamilyapproveofyourlineofworkWhatareyourthoughtsontheAcmemonopoly?" It became clear that the front door was taking quite a bit of pressure. The flashes from the cameras became brighter and brighter.
"I don't think we can stick around if things are going to be this bad" Lexi sighed.
"Don't worry, a little bit of the classical Duck charms and they will be more than satisfied" Duck stood up, then walked around in front of their table so that he would be the focus of most of the photos. He then immediately began posing in what the rest of them could only assume were meant to be cool and erotic poses. The end result was that he just looked ridiculous, but at the very least he was owning it.
"I don't think they're going to be satisfied with a few photos Duck" Tech said.
"In that case I'll just pop out for a quick QnA" Duck strolled towards the door, but the waiter leapt in front of him, stretching out his arms and legs to either side so that he was blocking the way out.
"There's no way in HELL I'm letting you open that door. Chaos will erupt" The waiter seemed to be becoming unhinged at the prospect of reporters flooding the restaurant. Duck did not seem nearly as concerned.
"Would you relax. Worst case scenario my compadres and I will just kick them out with our powers"
"Duck, that's an awful idea" Lexi countered, stepping forward, "We can't go using our powers on civilians, even in the unlikely scenario that we don't accidentally hurt one of them, that's still excessive force and the exact type of bad press Ace is always so worried about!"
It was then that one of the random civilians chimed in, "Um, excuse me but I have to attend my daughter's dance recital tonight. Is this going to go on much longer cause I don't want to be late?" Similar sentiments seemed to be spreading throughout the other patrons. How long was this going to go on? Were they just going to have to give up dinner and brave it out there? Suddenly, Tech took charge, standing up on his chair to get everyone's attention.
"Look people, you can complain all you want, but you brought this on yourselves. You were the ones who called the press here just so that you could make a quick buck, and now that it's mildly inconveniencing you, you go complaining about it. We're working out something, but until then it won't kill you to just stay seated." The coyote stepped down. He wasn't used to making public speeches like that. The crowd didn't seem all that pleased, but it certainly quieted people up, at least for now. Rev was shocked that Tech would do something so outgoing like that. For a brief moment, he was able to put aside all his worries and just look at Tech like a good friend you would want to have in a situation like this.
"How did I do? That didn't sound too condescending, did it?" Tech seemingly forgot the situation with Rev as well, seeing how open he was while asking.
"Are-you-kidding? It-was-great! The-way-you-calmed-down-the-crowd! The-authority-in-your-voice-was-so-commanding-and-cool! You-didn't-come-off-like-a-jerk-though-you-definitely-rode-the-line. I-didn't-even-know-you-had-the-capacity-for-a-public-speech-like-that-seeing-as-how-your-always-so-introverted-whenever-we-go-out-in-public-well-not-so-much-introverted-more-like-anti-social-not-to-imply-that-that's-a-bad-thing-or-anything-like-that-but-you-get-my-meaning-anyway-I'll-stop-talking-now" Rev stopped himself, he knew how much everyone disliked his rambles. Tech didn't say anything. At first Rev was worried he would be annoyed, but the look on his face was… a smile?
"You didn't interrupt me?" Rev said confused.
"Why would I?" Tech grinned. There was something about this moment that was nice, and they both knew it. It was a return to form for them, at least in some aspect. It wasn't exactly like how they acted around each other before today, but this comfort they found around each other, at least in this moment, showed that they could get over this. This made it all the more embarrassing when Rev felt a blush overtake him. He quickly turned away.
"Um, anyway we should probably get out of here!" Rev felt bad for doing so. They came so close to just having a nice comradery moment together, and he had to go breaking it apart. He was unsure as to whether or not Tech felt the same way, but he knew he was making things difficult by trying to hide his feelings like this.
All four of them approached the waiter. He seemed rather nervous with all of them looming over him, simultaneously trying to hold the door back while the flashing lights continued to fill the room, and the constant background chatter of the reporters ran on and on.
"Alright, I'm going to cut you a deal" the waiter gasped, "All I wanted was some free publicity for the restaurant, you know? We would be known as that place the Loonatics ate at, and maybe we could have had a nice picture up on the wall or something. Needless to say, this has gotten a bit out of hand, so I'll tell you what, I'll discount the food and you can take it to go" It was obvious he was becoming desperate.
"We want it for free, and we'll take two extra dishes for our friends back home" Lexi said.
"What? Free? Lady my boss would kill me!"
"You wanted them here, and now you want us gone. You got your free publicity, but we haven't gotten to have our night out. Everybody knows it's not as good when you bring it home because the steam in the container gets it wet. Now do we have a deal or what?" They all looked down at the waiter, beginning to feel bad for the guy.
"Ok! Ok! Take your food and sneak out through the back exit" The waiter gestured to the back.
"Thank you" and with that Lexi sauntered away. Sometimes, it paid to have ruthless negotiator.
"I guess it just shows, you can never get enough Duck" Danger Duck noted, following after her. Both Rev and Tech decided not to comment.
It wasn't long before their food arrived in two large plastic bags. It was decided that Tech would carry one, and Lexi the other. They did their best to sneak out the back, but with the gigantic window allowing the press to see in, they wondered if they could really get out so easily. The back entrance was through the kitchen. Soon enough they found themselves cautiously exiting the back door, entering into an alleyway alongside a dumpster. The door shut tight behind them, making it clear that they would not be allowed back in. A sudden realization then came over Lexi.
"Oh no!"
"What? What is it?" Rev asked.
"I just realized, the place we parked, we have to get past that mob of paparazzi in order to get to it!" Lexi exclaimed.
"Oh dang, she's right!" Tech said.
"Don't worry fellas, I will sacrifice myself to them. I will answer any question, take any photo, and endure the attention for as long as I can. I can't guarantee it, but I believe this will serve as the perfect distraction, allowing you to make your daring escape" Duck was about to wander out of the alleyway before Lexi grabbed him by the arm.
"I don't think so" she said, seeing through Duck's plan, "The best option we have is to split up. This way the crowd will at least be a bit more manageable. We'll go in groups of two. Rev, Tech, you two go together since you make for a pretty good team. I'll stick with Duck and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."
"Hey!" Danger Duck protested at that last remark.
Rev looked over to Tech. There was no telling how awkward things were going to be for them, but now wasn't the time for petty formalities. They had hot food that needed to be eaten quickly, it was a time sensitive issue! They both nodded in agreement towards Lexi.
"Right, then let's get out there!"
The four of them stepped out into the open on the sidewalk, waving their arms and calling to the press in order to get attention. At first, only one looked over, but then it seemed as if they all came plowing forwards at once. As if they all had some hive mind which required marketable information. Rev didn't think before acting. When Lexi and Duck began running one way, he grabbed Tech's hand and sped off in the opposite direction, as fast as he could.