3. Readjustments

"Severus?" Minerva called at the door to Severus' quarters. "It's time for your class!" She barked. No answer. Strange. Severus was always so punctual. What if something happened? She needs to check. "Lily." Minerva whispered to the door, which opened and let her inside. Inside was his office, and his bedroom. The office looked okay, but his bedroom? The door was ajar, and inside lay..."SEVERUS!" Minerva panicked, seeing him unconscious on his bedroom floor, his hair spread out in a black pool, his chest still, instead of rising and falling like it should. Minerva flipped him over, feeling for breath...but it was far too faint, far too slow. Fearing the worst, Minerva conjured a stretcher and lifted Severus into it, getting him to the hospital wing ASAP.

"He's not breathing." Madam Pomfrey said grimly as she tried to revive a near-dead Severus. Too much Dreamless Sleep potion means a sluggish heart, and Severus' face was draining of the little color it had, with few spells having any effect... "Ugh, why can't we try CPR!" Hermione fumed, as she had brought Ron and Harry to this very urgent scene. "What caused this?" Ron asked, bewildered, and Madam Pomfrey muttered, "Dreamless Sleep potion. I never should've given him that much, but now is not the time for guilt." "Just let me DO IT!" Hermione growled, and she pushed Madam Pomfrey out of the way, resorting to Muggle CPR. One. Two. Three. Four. Every second seemed like a reverberating eternity as Hermione pressed on Severus' chest. "There's-no-other-spells-we-can-try? Hermione panted, but at that moment she heard a faint, shuddering breath. Severus was back. Barely, but he was alive. Everyone heaved a sigh of relief. "How? How could he have almost DIED from Dreamless Sleep potion? He might have overdosed, but Severus isn't the type to be a potions addict..." "Actually, he IS." Minerva finished for her. "Severus IS a potions addict." She said darkly. There. She had to get the secret out to SOMEONE important. However Madam Pomfrey was less than impressed. Much less impressed than Minerva had thought. "AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME EARLIER? HOW? THIS MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH!" She screamed. "Quiet! We don't want others to hear." Minerva shushed her. "T-THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" Madam Pomfrey blustered. "I promised him not to tell! Sometimes honesty is NOT the best policy." Minerva shot back.

This year has gone REALLY hectic. Hailey thought at breakfast the next day. Professor Snape has had some kind of heart attack that landed him in the Hospital Wing yet again, but Hailey seemed to think it was more than just that that made Snape so sick this term. All DADA classes had been canceled because of this, and Hailey's suspected empath abilities weren't doing her any good. Nerve and tension overwhelmed her in the corridors, and she was finding it hard to concentrate in class with nasty rumors about Snape. There was more gossip about Hailey, too, and her supposed ability to 'feel other emotions' whatever that means. Did Voldemort's jinx on the DADA class stay? Will Snape die or stop teaching? Hailey HAD to help.

I'm alive? Severus thought faintly. Judging by the darkness around him he wasn't awake, but he COULD hear blurred voices...Severus used all his might to open his eyes, but failed...the Dreamless Sleep potion hasn't quite left him yet. "Severus? Professor Snape?" A girl's voice tempted worriedly. "Mi-miss Granger." Severus croaked. "A-are you awake?" Her voice quavered. Severus' eyes slowly opened, revealing dull black eyes, devoid of their usual glint. "Well. If it isn't our insufferable know it all." Severus sneered. Hermione smiled shyly. Seriously? I must be getting soft. Severus joked to himself. "And Hermione, brace yourself...you need to know this...Severus is a...potions addict." Severus' face resembled that of a furious anime character. "WHAT? YOU PROMISED NOT TO TELL! WHY CAN'T I KEEP A SECRET IN HERE!" And the man who had just been comatose seconds before was chasing Madam Pomfrey like a rabid dog, with the Golden Trio watching, dumb-struck and confused...

"Wait wait wait. Let me back this up." Harry blustered. "SNAPE. a POTIONS ADDICT. Did someone use the Imperius curse on him or something?" "Well Madam Pomfrey doesn't have a wicked sense of humor, does she? I want to help, but we're aurors and we can't exactly pull out of our jobs whenever we feel like it." Ron stated. there couldn't be more truth in his words; Harry and Hermione were certainly too busy. Their only hope was that the students or professors could help, but given Snape's persona and his reputation...even Harry couldn't do much to help. But they're being helped...unintentionally.

Something was off about Hailey Abott. Severus suddenly thought on his second day in the Hospital Wing. She had taken to either being unusually kind(something which Severus considered pathetic) or nervous(maybe I'm too intimidating?) around him. He wished that he could get out of the Hospital Wing and use Legilimency on Abott- Severus hated secrets being kept from him for no particular reason. Why? Just tell me and get it over with. he would think. But he was trapped here! Severus thought. Now the truth hit him; HE did this. Severus was foolish and pathetic; he used a physical potion to relieve his nightmares. All because he was a COWARD, which is ironic considering that Severus thought himself to be the polar opposite of one, and tried to run away from his problems. Now Severus had gotten himself KILLED. No, no he musn't think of it this way. Then Severus would get depressed and probably run away from his problems again. I will never, EVER use potions to relieve my nightmares. Or run away from my problems at all, in fact. Thinking about this gave Severus a new point of view; It was time to let go of old problems, let go of Lily, and start as a new Severus.

Madam Pomfrey didn't know how to describe it. Severus was a bit...off, to say the least. He didn't snap at her when she tried to feed him his potions, which could be accredited to the fact that Severus had brewed most of them himself. He was pretty...docile. Madam Pomfrey couldn't see the sneaky glint in his eyes; nor the sneer that more often than not adorned his face; or the menacing growl of his voice. Madam Pomfrey wondered if this was an after-effect of overdosing on Dreamless Sleep, she thought that Severus would return his usual snarky manner later. How very wrong was she...

"Hello." Severus greeted Madam Pomfrey hesitantly the next day. He winced at how out-of-character this was...being nice isn't that easy. Maybe Potter IS good at something...even if it doesn't require intelligence. He didn't protest when Madam Pomfrey fed him his potions, even though every cell of his brain was itching to do so. Now Severus had to cope with the gossip that Severus is a potions addict when he got discharged...What am I thinking? Severus shook himself. He had just vowed a night ago NEVER to run away from his problems again, something which had become habitual for Severus, hiding his problems behind the shell of 'greasy git'. Maybe I'll give up trying to be someone I'm not. Yes, a kind-hearted Snape would just get laughed at.

A week later when Severus could move the 'rehab' training began. It was hell; Without gliding by magic Severus felt his legs were made of water. Severus had also tried to perform magic; but found that he couldn't do anything with a wand and the magic quickly sputtered out. Even his Legilimency didn't work-the images he got from other people's mind were just small, blurred images, not real thoughts. Harry, Ron and Hermione visited sometimes when they weren't busy with Auror work-and they made sure that no one knew that Snape is a potions addict in rehab training. For Harry, honesty is the best policy-but there'd be an uproar if the news got out. Harry also started seeing many more details about Severus-how his eyes were hollowed and shadowy, with wrinkles on the corners; how he looked he hadn't eaten in days; even the grey streaks in Severus' hair. He had lost his intimidating air-even though Harry knew that wasn't the case. Severus' legs shook with every step-and more often than not Harry could hear the thud of falling and Severus groaning as he tried to right himself whenever he visited, eavesdropping on the rehab training room. He also seemed more emotional that harry thought possible-Harry could hear him yelling at the healer from St. Mungos, goaded beyond endurance. Sometimes Severus had caught Harry at it-but as he had been on the receiving end of Severus' knife tongue for the last 12 years this didn't bother him too much. Even Ron had laid off the habit of eyeing Severus as if he was one of the gross potions ingredients in his office- everyone needed help sometimes. But today isn't a normal day.

"No...Can't do it...not now..." Harry heard Severus' weak voice, when he was eavesdropping on the rehab training room, on another of his days off. Harry opened the door just a tiny slit-and what he saw almost made him gasp. Severus was leaning against the wall, veins throbbing in his arms-they were the only things that stopped him from collapsing like a limp puppet. "Come on, just a few more minutes." The healer ushered, but Severus was buying none of it and sidled out the door and collapsed on his bed, chest heaving. Ugh, can't Severus just get these healers to leave him alone?