The WHiDAAA Cast reacts to things from Earth

by Magnum Lazarus

Based off of Reactionist's Watching Him Die Again and Again, aka WHiDAAA. The Cast reacts to various things from Earth, learning that not all is what they think.

3. Chapter 3

Contains Arc 4, 5, IFs, and EX Side Story spoilers

Contains language and depictions of violence

Copyright warning just in case

The Questionable Wellbeing of The Misplaced Knight

It had been a while since he was able to get good sleep, or be able to sleep in, even though this new world ran on a mostly similar 24-hour day/night cycle.

The encounters with The Bowel Hunter, the Ma-Beast invasion of Arlam, The White Whale Hunt, loosing Rem, killing Betelgeuse, The Sanctuary, The Great Rabbit, and currently, the start of a new loop in the Watergate City of Priestella, which would soon be overrun by The Witch Cult and a few of the Sin Archbishops. As they say, "Ain't no rest for the wicked."

It's a constant grind for him, having to redo the same events over and over, hoping that he'll get it right next time. Watching his friends and innocent bystanders die horrifically, only for him to throw away his life to restart, usually dying even more horribly. All thanks to his power.

He has seen things being done to others, had worse things done to him, and had done things most would consider unforgivable. And yet, he's still standing proud, smiling, laughing, and loving those around him. It took the combined efforts of the somewhat dead 7 Witches and a now forgotten comatose oni maid to help him realize that he's not a sinner, not a horrible person, but a loving, lost, and innocent boy. The fact that most of his friends are standing alongside him is proof that he did something right, no matter how many loops it took and will take. To keep them safe. He'll give his life over and over again, if it meant eventually securing a future with them side by side.

Even if no one knew what he had to do to get their present, he would rush headfirst, using every "underhanded" advantage he has to make sure everyone would walk out alive. If things turned for the worse, he would be forced to rely on his peculiar and forced "gift"; the source of his suffering; the painful silencing; Return By Death.

His feats in this new world were: killing The White Whale and Betelgeuse; his contract with Beatrice, which granted him his quasi-official titles of "The Lolimancer" and "The Loli Knight"; the killing of The Great Rabbit; the saving of The Sanctuary; and being knighted as proof of his undying loyalty, cunning, and perseverance to his friends; to protect Emilia and the others by himself, which he sees as penance for Rem and the failed loops.

What did he have to show for his feats? Endless, mind-numbing, and soul breaking death and restarts. His lack of pride, his self-harm, and nightmares from the especially damaging failed loops. He's seen everyone around him die so many times; he's died in horrible ways by those close to him; he's committed suicide; he lost Rem; he can't die permanently; he doesn't love himself; he wants to find purpose in his life; in his suffering; so he throws himself and wastes loops.

But he finally has a well-deserved rest; a break from all of his constant torment; a break in the midst of his eternal suffering; a chance to take a moment to breath and relax from the suffocating and well rationalized fear of dying.

He wasn't anyone special in his isekai life. Not some kid with an insanely broken ability in the traditional sense; not living in some cozy mansion with a killer harem arranged by the powers that be. No, he was just a regular 18-year-old human boy: a former hikikomori; a grain of sand on a blue marble floating about in the endless abyss; a nobody; forced out of his comfortable life and shoved bare balls first into a realm of magic and mutilation that would make the world of Dark Souls look like a cutesy Slice of Life anime. The only thing he brought and still has with him, are his favorite tracksuit and his wits.

He was like any of the other millennials or Gen-Zs that grew up watching anime; those about other worlds or absurd and useful powers. He assumed that if you were put into another world by whatever "Laws of The Multiverse" BS was at play, you'd get something useful in that new world. Something like infinite wisdom; a weapon or skill that makes Excalibur look like a leaf; or a stat/attribute boost that makes you stronger than Superman, maybe flight or run speed that tops at something high like Mach 20.

He very quickly realized that he got none of that, hoping that he'd have something a little less obvious; temporal manipulation like teleportation or time control; a forgotten form of ancient magi-tech that can change its size, appearance, and use to his will. Upon checking his "starter gear, stats, and skills", he had none of those. No UI for this young boy.

But to add to his list of unfulfilled fantasies and expectations, he hoped he had something akin to a Stand. Best case scenario, he'd hoped to have something OP like Golden Experience/GER, D4C/LT, or Star Platinum TW. If not, he'd settle for quite literally any other Stand than Survivor. Hermit Purple, Sex Pistols, Hierophant Green, Aerosmith, Silver Chariot. Hell, even Hamon would be fair game.

He even prayed to every god, deity, eldritch entity, and even demon that he knew the name of, begging that if he didn't get the other things, they'd at least give him a dumb ability that sounded like it was ripped from a chunibyo. Something edgy and striking, like Flame Dominion, Devilish Charm, or Dead Eye. Then he quickly realized that the powers (if any) that be, were ignoring him.

The chunibyo power idea, just like the Stands, was a big nope. Even if by whatever divine or demonic miracle, gift, or curse, he was rather delicate for flames, too scary looking for charisma, and had no gun, much less accuracy, skills whatsoever.

And so, when the time came to "trigger" the Alley Trio "event" of Dumb, Dumber, and Dumberest, he realized that fighting hurts. He was outmatched in a 1v3, armed with only his mediocre jiujitsu techniques and grip strength he explicitly earned from hours on end of swinging a kendo sword. Facing off against him were "low-level/bunches of XP" hoodlums with weapons. This didn't go to well for him, but it's how he met the one he loves and protects.

It wasn't until he met the rancid dumpster fire level of waste of looks known as Elsa Granhiert, professionally known as The Bowel Hunter, that he learned he wasn't the wielder of any special item or ability. A sadomasochistic serial killer (and a well-endowed woman); wielder of endless blades; capable of inhuman speeds; known and feared by even her clientele for her preferred method of killing. She reminded him of some girl from some anime; long black hair, extremely powerful, into S&M, very well-endowed, but he couldn't put his finger on who she was. But enough digression; he was dying in a really fucked up way in a really fucked up place.

Disembowelment and mutilation; she bleeds you out and cuts off limbs and appendages as she toys and 'admires' your broken and bleeding corpse like a child gawking at a store display cake.

It wasn't until meeting her that he realized that he got an ability that could've easily been given the Florida Man equivalent of immortality. He quickly learned that this new power of his had rules and drawbacks.

It automatically kicks in upon his death; he isn't allowed to talk about it, the risk being his and/or someone else's death; it leaves a strange residue, The Witch's Scent, which can leave curse induced necrosis in dense enough quantities, and it can be detected by Ma-Beasts, few demi-humans, and even fewer humans, normally causing the latter two to think he's a Witch Cultist.

It was then, after he had died so quickly and effortlessly; bleeding out on the cold wooden floor, intestines thrown about, Emilia dying alongside him; he realized he wasn't anyone specially chosen for an urgent quest in another world; he was just an ordinary guy in a strange place with no way home. The only things he has going for him are his wits, his deduction, his face, his friendships, and his curse-like blessing of Return By Death, which allows him to gather information from the future, making the world forget anything that happened. All at the once-in-a-lifetime discounted cost of having to die and wake up at crappy autosaved checkpoints that're out of his control.

Not to dump salt on his numerous old wounds, but he couldn't use magic in this crazy world. He tried the first time he saw danger, where a child was almost run over. He spun around, dropped to one knee, and shot his hand out to cast magic. Some knight ended up saving the kid, he made a fool of himself, and he realized that maybe he wasn't ready to use magic yet. Sometime even later, he learned that this world had an unconventional magic system that made some sense when he thought about it more.

Everyone has this organ or metaphysical component or something that's called a gate. This "gate" acts as a faucet for the mana in the body; mana being the essential fuel for life and obligatory MP. And everything with a gate has one or more affinities to an element. You are restricted to the magic of the affinity(ies) you're born with, with no way to change them.

Spells have 4 basic variations, increasingly more costly but exponentially more powerful. The weakest and "base" spell had no prefix, next step up was the prefix "El", then "Ul", and finally the strongest, "Al". There is the possibility to create spells or combine them, but that's usually too dangerous for the average Mage.

There are 6 affinities; the more common "Avatar 4" of Earth, Fire, Water, Air +2 rare affinities, Yin and Yang; Light and Dark. Earth magic is Earth-bending; Fire magic is actually temperature control, with ice and fire spells; Water magic is healing and actual water; Air magic is just air; Yin magic is crappy de-buffs at worst and world ending at strongest, with the possibility of sending things to what he later called, The Rabbit Zone; Yang magic is buffs and finger laser guns.

When he got to the mansion, Puck told him that he has Yin affinity only, but also his gate has never been used. He ended up damaging his gate upon casting Shamak there in the yard and collapsing his gate against Garfiel. He now relies on Beako to act as his gate.

On top of regular magic, there are spirits in this world. Lesser spirits are little floating quasi-sentient balls of mana, and Greater Spirits are fully sentient bodies of mana like Puck and Beatrice. There are regular Mages, those who use mana in their bodies; and Spirit Art Mages, those who draw mana from the atmosphere and contracted spirits.

This world also has something called Spirit Affinity, which allows one to contract with spirits, make contracted spirits stronger over time, and attracts spirits to them. He has an unusually high Spirit Affinity, but due to his contract with Beatrice, he can't form contracts with other spirits.

During Puck's Magic For Dummies course, he learned that there's something called OD, which Puck then simplified as life force. OD acts like the glue that prevents your body from breaking apart after using your body's mana; the cup holding the water. Once your body's mana is expended, you begin to use up your OD, which is equivalent to burning your lifespan. The source of mana, one's OD, Divine Blessings/Protections, and every aspect of life is called The OD Laguna. It is unknown if OD Laguna is real, where it is, what it is, or how it works; but whatever it may be, it is near-omnipotent.

With all the rules and restrictions on this world's magic system, he became even more confused as there's another layer of magic, but its components could be more accurately be described as an Anti-Divine Blessings; The Authorities. Powerful and taboo magic wielded by only The Sin Archbishops of The Witch Cult, gifted by Satella. Few, including him, knew part of the truth; they weren't from Satella or the other Witches, but they weren't from OD Laguna. They are said to be more powerful than Divine Blessings; their possessors being demi-gods in their own right.

After killing The Sin Archbishop of Sloth, accidentally drinking Echidna's tea, and fighting Garfiel, he unlocked his version of the Authority of Sloth; Invisible Providence. With the brainstorming of the Witches and his deductive skill, they came to the theory that his ability, Return By Death, is the Authority of Envy. Although Satella did appear at a Tea Party, she never explained what Return By Death was, other than it was her gift to him.

He has no Divine Blessings, a broken gate, Yin affinity, high Spirit Affinity, a contracted Greater Spirit, and potentially 2 Authorities. He has no way home, he is never safe, and all his choices come back to haunt him in some way.

He and his psyche were easily broken. He always appeared to be mentally strong and a well-organized, fearless, and cunning leader in life-or-death situations. But with sufficient trauma, he'll shatter into millions of pieces, just like he did at a certain Tea Party. He went crazy or emotionally dead in some loops; he's lost the average perception of time; he has near constant mood swings; he has reoccurring nightmares every night, memories of failed loops; and eventually resorted to self-harm to temporarily forget, cope, or repent for the past loops.

He used to acknowledge Return By Death as a curse, then came a certain loop. His breakdown ended with Satella's pep talk in The Tea Party Dream-realm. Telling him to love himself more, he shouldn't waste his gift at every hardship, and he should find the best way to see himself grow as a person.

He now regards it more as a blessing disguised as a curse. Way to step it up, immortal and clueless pauper.

Piece by piece, loop by loop, death by death, he was falling apart. It was only a matter of failed tries later that he would be completely broken, reduced to a mess like a failed loop's Emilia. Reeking of only false emotion, misery, and death; her imitation of feelings; her lost, fixated, crazed, empty, obsessed wide-eyed gaze; her blatant declaration that she loves him; and the kiss that tasted of death; cold, emotionless, and uncaring as was his soon to be corpse.

He wasn't particularly good at keeping most secrets. People around him know when he's lying; hiding with magic; when he has a plan; and when something is wrong with him. He was translucent; it was easy to see past his goofy poses and handcrafted facade of calm and control. His friends could only see a bit of him, the result of him carrying guilt and pain. The guilt and pain of having to die; failing to save them; failing to treat himself better.

Then one loop, after dying and "respawning" to earlier that loop, which he failed after an attempt to kill the Sin Archbishop of Wrath, he suddenly fell asleep. Pure, sweet, restful, sleep. For the 1st time in about a year since he was transported, he felt well rested. His worries of dying, his nightmares, his memories of those he couldn't save, his memories of failed loops, his pain, his self-hatred; all gone, melted away with the warm embrace of peaceful sleep.

He knew he wasn't dying or that Satella was pulling him to her Garden of Shadows. He couldn't hear or feel anything in the real world, but he felt at peace. He was falling asleep as if he was at home; without worry and knowing he that he would wake up the next morning. Demons laugh when you talk about the next year you might not have, so talk about the tomorrow you do have, and smile. And did he have a lot of physical and mental demons.

It was quiet in his thoughtful sleep, with him being able to spend time reliving happier memories, not having to suffer endlessly. He was never hungry, thirsty, tired, or sad. It was a dream, so if he wanted to eat, he'd eat; if he wanted to game, he'd game; if he had fantasies about Emilia and Rem, he tried to figure out how he's gonna squeeze in Invisible Providence; if he wanted to live back on Earth with all his friends, he'd picture his parents being surprised, accepting, and trusting that he made so many strange friends in his disappearance.

Then after what had felt like he had recharged a day or two with proper sleep, he lost control of his dreams. He saw through the eyes of his body, but his body thought and did things differently. All he could do was hitch a ride while watch through the eyes of multiple hims.

In the first variation, he died 88 times back in the beginning loop because he never called for guards to help deal with the Alley Trio, so Reinhard never showed up to eventually help him beat Elsa. When Reinhard randomly showed up in the 89th loop to stop Elsa, he hated him, wondering why he never helped people in need, why he never helped him. This version of him readied himself to make Emilia the ruler by whatever means, and that started with the help of Roswall.

This twisted, alternate version saved Elsa, saying he would let her live if she worked for him; he joined the Witch Cult, forced the title of Sin Archbishop of Pride onto him, and ended up owning a house. Becoming a Sin Archbishop was perfect, so he began to use them from the inside, his plan being to kill Archbishop by Archbishop, starting with Betelgeuse, who died after a few hundred loops

He felt sick, still not entirely used to the sight and smell of death, and hating the fact that this 'him' was already turning into the amalgamation desired by Roswall. Since the new 'him' never stayed at the mansion long enough, Rem and Arlam village died of the Ma-Beast curse bites and ensuing attack; leaving Ram behind, lonely and desperate, for true love, affection, and company; making her more complacent and willing to do Roswall's obscure and absurd requests, which were plans from a member of The Witch Cult that was interested about Emilia's ascension to the throne.

The White Whale Hunt was a complete disaster, with unknown casualties and forgotten people. A completely erased Crusch was forced to drop from the Royal Race, leaving Felix mentally unstable and desperate, making the catboy the perfect slave. It only took several thousand loops to get this desired result.

With the help of Elsa, a lesser fire spirit, and the lives of his wives; they killed the Sin Archbishop of Greed, Regulus Corneas. All his wives hated him because he treats them as extra lives and time, so they had no problems with dying so they will kill him. The lesser fire spirit burned down the Corneas Mansion, killing all the now satisfied wives; limiting the Archbishop's Authority to his own body. Elsa was ordered to chop him up till he was just a torso and head; he could watch his wives and mansion burn to ash as he bleeds out in the mud.

He knew Betelgeuse called him 'Pride', painfully reminding him of a devastating loop. But how would joining the Witch Cult do anything? Were the Cult grunts really that compliant and diligent to the Archbishops? Is this how The Whale Hunt would've gone if the hunting party never gathered under him? Would he be able to kill Regulus like this? Is this what would've happened if he fell that far?

He killed Lugunican knights and citizens, out of boredom and planning, with Julius being killed by Felix in a bar; he used Otto to clean up his messes, the merchant working to erase his debt with Russel Fellow; he slowly forced Reinhardt to descend down a darker path, the so-called Sword Saint never making an attempt to stop the Witch Cult's methodical rampage.

In this loop, the entirety of the Kingdom of Lugunica is on fire; thanks to Witch Cultists, Ram, and Roswall. Reinhardt is in the Capital, having just killed the young Ma-Beast wielder, Meili, with little hesitation. The sick alteration of him walked towards Reinhard, crying out of anger; he was never able to defeat him in any of his thousands of failed loops. So instead of killing him, he'd kill his image, his reputation, his purpose.

He'd kill The Hero, turning the entire world on him, hating him, wishing he was dead. All his contacts, associates, partners, anyone with a connection to him, were dead at the hands of The Sword "Saint" or the fire. Elsa popped up from the shadows as she always did, stopping Reinhard from striking the crazed boy with Reid. She immediately dies, saying she enjoyed working with him, going so far as to say she loved him, even if he wanted her dead for reasons unknown.

He ran, having repeated this loop hundreds of times, running into Emilia and Puck. He took off his Cult attire, and put on his pristine condition tracksuit, loudly congratulating Emilia for making it this far in her ascendence to Queen. She never asked for any of this, barely remembering him as the kid that helped her get the insignia back. In shock, she asked who he was, why a Witch Cultist is involved in these things happening around her working in her favor.

He put on a smile that would make Betelgeuse jealous, crazily and pridefully exclaiming, "SIN ARCBISHOP OF PRIDE, SUBARU NATSUKI." He made a Hail-Mary sprint towards her, masking the purpose of his mad dash.She summoned Puck as he ran towards her, he had no intention of hurting her. The spirit and half-elf shot cast a flurry of magical ice spikes, leaving him with enough energy to say a few last words.

"It was all for making you the perfect hero to become The Queen. The one who saved the world from The Whale, The Witch Cult; the one who stopped the villain." She asked, "Why?" He felt the sting of death by ice inching closer, so with his final breath he said, "I love you." With that said, he succumbed to death once more, faced the empty abyss before Return By Death would've kicked in.

Instead, he subconsciously knew he wouldn't go back, and he wasn't alone in the void this time. He had no regrets, no other plans, no other purpose. His plan had been fulfilled to the last minute-detail. Feeling the coldness of death and the warming embrace of an unknown but familiar presence, he joined Satella in her Garden of Shadows, laying to rest, for now, and all eternity.

The real Subaru was sickened by what monster he would've become if he never swallowed his manly pride and called for help. This... thing... had no care, but for Emilia... had no other plan, but for Emilia. This monstrosity of pride and bravado did everything there was to do to be a villain. The Real Him knew that he never would've joined the Witch Cult. But after seeing this "what if" divergence, he was starting to doubt that. The Prideful Him died and Returned probably a quarter million times, maybe more, but he stopped actively counting after about 10 thousand.

He knew where this Pride version of him went wrong, and he knew that if Typhon got a hold of this defective piece-of-shit son-ova-bitch, he'd want her to lash out at it, making it shatter as painfully as possible. But The Witches worked in strange ways, most having titles that made some sense.

Minerva, The Wrath Witch, was a healer in life, and got "angry" when people were suffering front of her, so she did her best to heal them. Daphne, The Gluttony Witch, a child that wanted to end world hunger and eat. So, she created The Whale to end short term hunger, The Bunny to solve the long-term problem, and The Snake for population control, making sure that less things had more to eat. Echidna, The Greed Witch, was a self-proclaimed "student" and a young, tender, maiden in life and death. In life, she wanted to learn all there could be, so she sought immortality. She reminded him of a certain Prince in a game that made him draw parallels with this new world. If it and Echidna met, maybe they'd get along and trade knowledge.

Typhon, The Pride Witch, was an executioner's young daughter, and they took pride in that they were doing a civil service. But when she acquired the Pride Witch Factor, she followed in her father's footsteps and headstones, killing those her Authority deemed "sinners". She would carry on to her life's role of Judge, Jury, and Executioner even as a Witch. Sekhmet, The Sloth Witch, was self-explanatory, the embodiment of laziness. In life, she fought The Divine Dragon Volcanica near the "Great Waterfall" for a napping spot, but she fell off and died in the fight. Carmilla, The Lust Witch, while alive, was a normal person stuck in a tight spot. She was an engaged young adult in a village, whose beauty caused multiple wars that destroy entire countries, all in her name, for her sake, or her hand in marriage. She was abducted constantly, showered with proposals, but when her fiancé saved and proposed to her from the top of a tower, she refused, claiming that what she wanted no longer existed, which most likely meant she was looking for true love, not for what she looked like, but for who and what she was. She had lost that "spark" that let her know love.

Then there was Satella, The Witch of Envy, The Jealous (Or Envious) Witch. All that's know is she absorbed an incompatible Witch Factor, causing her to form a darker split personality, which was named with her title, Envy. They are 2 beings in one body, which is sealed underneath The Pleiades Watchtower. She is obsessed with Subaru and The Great Sage Flugel for unknown reasons, other than they showed her kindness and compassion. She isn't dead, but is sealed somewhat, but his knowledge of the seal was unknown, and that it had weakened over the centuries. But the fact that Satella, or Envy, was always watching over him like The Morrigan and Fionn was painfully clear to Subaru, as she walked between the material world and her Garden of Shadows at her will or when he spoke about his ability to Return.

In the second variation, one of the loops before he made Rem an ally, his first suicide loop; instead of jumping from Ram to restart, he did something different. She caught up to him, knocking him down to strangle him. She collapsed, losing her grip, and falling off him due to her injuries and lack of energy after fighting Beatrice. He choked her near unconsciousness and caved her head in with a rock. He abandoned the mansion and headed out into his new world, leaving the mansion near destitute, with only Roswall, Emilia, Beatrice, and Frederica the only inhabitants.

After 2 years of planning, recruiting, and looping, he created the largest criminal organization to ever exist: its home base, Pandemonium, on the border of Kararagi and Lugunica; its name, Pleiades; and its ruler, known widely as The Purge King, known by those in his inner circle, as King, Boss, Master, Liege.

Drugs, assassination, blackmail, trade, politics, inside-jobs, and any other activity you could think of, was most likely at the order of The Purge King and his bloody cape of Pleiades. The countries of Gusteko, Vollachia, Kararagi, and Lugunica feared him. The Assassin's Guild even feared him. Mentioning The Purge King in public was as taboo as Satella, followed by the sudden disappearance and purging of you, your family, friends, associates, and business. Burnt to less than ashes, bodies mutilated and displayed to the public, living magic bombs, any form of destruction and disregard of life, by his whim. He and his organization couldn't care less about consequences; killing, raping, bribing, blackmailing, dealing, and stealing to their heart's content.

If any member was captured and mentioned Pleiades, they were to be released as soon as possible, or the apprehenders and anyone they know would be purged; if anyone were to betray him, they and their families were magically suspended for endless torture; if his empire was not involved or aware of any dealings or trade, all involved parties suddenly disappeared, and emerge later in unrecognizable states, only for the Purge King's mark to be present- death of the entire family tree.

He was the head of the underworld, the big boss, the new devil, the meister of loss, harbinger of end, the lord of carnage, the king of destruction. None could escape his wrath or his influence; none were safe from The Purge King, real name- Subaru Natsuki.

At the head of this endless suffering and demise, was a small boy, no older than 19. He was of average height, a skeletal frame, and fragile, pale skin; tired, dead eyes irradiating hate; and an eternal aura of anger and violence, causing most in his presence to fall on their knees, throw up, and promptly executed, as if in the presence of a Witch. He sat on his throne in the heart of Pleiades, the tower known as Pandemonium. Not many realized he was color blind, seeing the world in black and white, with the exception of those he believed he trusted and cared for.

He wielded absolute power, having a special fear embedded in every citizen, even his own men would consider him the new Witch, or Warlock, of Wrath. He has never been seen eating or sleeping, but those that did were erased from existence. He sat there on his throne, occasionally walking around Pandemonium or his territories for surprise inspection, killing men or house cleaning if anything was out of order. But he was a forgiving king, offering painless death or hereditary servitude.

He ruled an eternally loyal army of famous soldiers, mercenaries, and fighters; headed by his personal protection duty of Halibel, one of the few living but mysterious and proud Wolf-Men Shinobi, and Cecilus "Blue Lightning" Segmunt, the strongest Divine General of Vollachia, unmatched in speed and sword skill, except for Reinhardt, an uneducated young adult armed with 2 Legendary Swords; The Fiend Sword, Murasame, rumored to instantly kill, even immaterial beings; and The Dream Sword, Musayume, rumored to slowly consume the user's soul. His most trusted and respected men, and if he could trust anyone, he would've considered them friends or even brothers.

He had to spend dozens of loops gaining the trust and loyalty of all his men, with Cecilus and Halibel being the hardest. He built his organization from the ground up, from scratch, from zero. He had died brutally when he blackmailed, hired, and saved his associates and soldiers. He got his signature look from his 'mean looking' sanpaku eyes. They darkened each day without sleep and with each day of being the head.

He smooth-talked his way up to where he was, despite having the scariest look on his face. He earned his connections with his charismatic way with words, doing jobs, recruiting more soldiers, and sheer brutality.

He got his troops' respect, and they trusted him. Halibel and Cecilus were amazed at his perception, which they nearly believed to be precognition. He almost always knew when a deal would go south; when and where a rival group would attack; how he prevented his assassination with ease as he pointed out poison or magical tampering. He knew and saw everything that happened, even when he wasn't there. It's why the assassination attempts gradually stopped as they did nothing to hurt him. It eventually became a game to him; waiting for the hidden assassin to get close to him, only for Halibel and Cecilus to be summoned from the shadows to kill them.

After the third or fourth assassination failed, he sent a letter to each party, the same message sent each time, with daily packages of hired assassins' bodies being sent, or the extracted poison lacing the letter or in a vial.

'Stop sending assassins. I've killed them all, and I know it's getting too expensive. I've caught worse trying to use magic and poison. If you continue to send more, I will use only ONE try. And won't have to send another.'

The letters worked, usually, and for those that didn't get the memo and kept trying, so he sent bags of explosive magic crystals into their bedrooms or sent either Halibel or Cecilus.

Subaru was unsettled slightly from just the King's gaze in the mirror, he helplessly watched through the skeletal figure's eyes as he ordered unending misery. He wanted this nightmare to end, wishing he never had Return By Death, pleading for every deity and demon to let him go, and considered offering himself to Satella.

Months and loops went into the planning of the siege on the main Mathers mansion, with the assistance of Puck, in order to rescue Emilia, who had stopped participating in the Royal Race because no one had enthusiastically supported her. When the time came, The Purge King and his protection duty walked through the front door, acting on their plan. Cecilus killed Roswall, the wrath variant of Subaru killed a still colorful Beatty, Puck froze a later recovered Frederica, and Emilia being led out the door and into Pandemonium.

Russel Fellow came before the King to announce his proposition of trade for magic gems. The deal was successful, and he flipped a coin, landing on tails. Cecilus decapitated the merchant, and the King instructed his men to seize the dead man's assets and burn down everything if his family is rude in the slightest.

He decided who lived with a coin flip, especially those deemed untrustworthy, especially merchants. Heads: people live and their loyalty to his little group resulted in their families and business to become unbelievably wealthy. Tails: someone dies, and forces are dispatched to their homes. In either case, if their families are hospitable, they are allowed to join their merry band, if not, the business and home is purged along with family and associates.

Frederica came out from a door and immediately cleaned up all the blood, like all of the other messes he made. With all of the death he commands, the power to start a genocide with a snap of his fingers, he wasn't used to the sight and smell of blood. It made him nauseous.

He only ever ate if Frederica made him a meal, from caution of assassination by a country or an attempt of retribution by a nameless victim of his reign. He only ever ate once or twice a week, and he ate only enough to keep him standing, gaining hardly more than 3 tatos worth of energy per meal. He had an endless supply of poison testers and labor, but only allowed Frederica to handle and prepare his food, watching her take a bite of each meal before he ate in his bedroom and office, which housed everything about Pleiades. Member names, safehouses, controlled politicians, income sources, escape routes, building layouts, invention blueprints, and his personal belongings. His strange sweater, and the orange scarf that's always around his neck. He only ever takes off his tracksuit or scarf when he lets Frederica wash them as he waits and watches her.

He rarely slept, his eyes darkened at the edges, reminding him of when he was back home on earth, watching Naruto by himself or with his mom as a kid; his now most relatable character being Gaara of The Hidden Sand Village. The only time he slept was when he went into what his soldiers called, "The Princess Room", which is where he was headed. The only knowledge the soldiers had was that it housed a girl whose name no one knew, only being known and called The Princess.

He gave a small smile at the fitting name, being one of the only 4 to know what lied beyond the vault door covered by unique locks and impenetrable material, as all the construction crews were killed to preserve the secret. There were no keys to the wall of locks, as it unlocked from the inside by the permission of a certain spirit. He asked for Puck to open the door, felt the temperature drop, and saw the door open.

Everything inside the room was white. The walls, floor, tables, and bed; all were beautiful and clean white, so pure that the air outside would taint the room. Inside, laid a single girl and her talking cat spirit. A beautiful girl who had smooth pale skin, silver hair, amythest eyes, a slender physique, and rounded elf like ears; her ears being the only sign of her half-elf heredity. Her name was Emilia, just Emilia. He could still admire her beauty in color, able to gaze into her shiny purple eyes, or into her silky-smooth hair.

The King only came here for one of three reasons: to talk with her, to relive stress with a lap pillow, or to sleep with a lap pillow. The only ones besides the rooms' inhabitants that knew what was being protected, were him and Frederica, who gave her daily meals of the finest quality that Pleiades could arrange.

He talked to her for a bit, and fell asleep in her lap, with her grooming and playing his hair. The half-elf looked at the young boy sleeping on her lap: alone, scared, and defenseless, almost like he was a baby in their mother's arms. 'He looked like a child when sleeping. I know he cares for me, in some way.'

3 years after the deviation from the original timeline, all 4 countries, mostly Lugunica, lifted Reinhardt Law, which had prevented the 22-year-old Sword Saint from traveling abroad since he was 6, because he was mutually deemed an international threat.

The Noble Knight burst through a wall, mowing down any that dared to oppose him, and eventually facing down Cecilus, who he had defeated years prior in a surprise duel while weakened during a meeting to sign a non-aggression pact between Lugunica and Vollachia.

Subaru ran, Halibel staying by his side, who he thanked for his service and dismissed. He reached The Princess Room, letting Emilia and Puck free. Puck left to stall Reinhardt, and a different Emilia came to life. She tried to convince Her King to run away with her, claiming that she'd die with and for him. It was the last time Subaru saw her in color, immediately leaving her behind as he ran back to his office.

Subaru just stared, tired of watching his alternate self die over and over again, feeling especially sickened that he saw another one of 'those' Emilias appear. Quietly waiting and watching in his own head as years and loops become one in the same, waiting for the eventual death of this version of him.

He opened a secret room behind a bookcase. A room of naked stone; bare, except for shackles on the wall across the entry, and the person restrained in them. Rambling on and on non-scenically, hosting imaginary meetings with her long dead sister and Roswall. He knew what she was constantly muttering to herself, because he had kept her alive after all these years.

She looked up to see his silhouette, squinting at the light coming from his room, screaming at him with all the rage she could muster. Pure and unfiltered hate emanating from her mouth, haplessly arm swings held back by her shackles.

He stared at her in fulfilment, with a slight hint of gratefulness fighting to break through his unending demeanor. She still had her maid uniform, and he stared at her, hypnotized by her color.

"I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARASU, I'LL KILL YOU BARAS-!"

He walked closer to her, she stopped screaming and writhing, and returned her face to a memorable permanent scowl she saved for him. He released her from the bindings; her hands, arms, and legs being exposed to air for the first time in years; pressure sores visible where her chains once kept her subjugated.

She stretched her body; joints snapped loudly and muscles tense from her unmoving. She applied healing magic to her sores; quickly making them fade, her skin repairing itself, and the pain quickly subsiding with the more mana she expended. She was confused as he just stood there, his dead and tired eyes became soft; gazing and sadly smiling at her like the pervert she once called him before. She understood why he came here and applied magic to her throat.

"Finally, did you come wanting to die, Barasu?"

They stared at each other. One with unmatchable hate; the other with a mix of violence, acceptance, fear, and tiredness.

"I've seen and caused more than enough death to last hundreds of lifetimes. I've died over and over again to gain the trust of my men, to prevent my death, and to get where you were back then at the mansion. I know there's no way I can escape Reinhardt. I'm done with it all. I want it to end."

He laid down and removed his orange scarf, revealing the handprints on his neck she left all those years ago, back when she tried to strangle him. She put her hands on his neck, and noticed it felt softer and weaker than it had back then. She began to use force on him, not bothering to keep his hands down as she knew and saw he didn't resist. It looked like he really was asking for her to do it.

He took one last breath before she started. It was the deepest and most relaxing breath he's ever taken. He felt his burdens and sins melt away as she strangled him, knowing it will only take less than a minute with her strength and expertise. He began to tear up a bit, smiling and looking at her as his strength disappeared.

He said, "Thank you."

The color of her short pink hair and ruby red eyes stayed in his eyes and thoughts through the whole process. As his conscience faded back to black, Ram's color remained. It was the last thing he saw before he died.

He awoke, not in Pandemonium, but in a vast space. He felt the unfamiliar but welcoming presence of someone else and embraced his end and future. He stayed dead, his body and soul laid to rest. Now, and forever, for all eternity.

Subaru had enough of the wrath he just lived through. Looking through another different set of his eyes, living and feeling every second and loop passing. Waiting for this nightmare to end.

When the nightmare's end had come, all he could do was accept that when he himself has fulfilled his role, having no remaining regrets, and accepted his end; maybe he too would like to enter whatever peaceful afterlife that followed if he was good, and maybe understand why Satella wants him.

He's had enough with other timelines. He wanted to see one where he didn't suffer every second, but knew that wasn't likely. He wasn't sure why he was here in this dream realm, or who sent him here. But if there was a message about these What If scenarios he saw, it was to make sure he followed the Path of Virtue, and not the Path of Sin.

He saw himself as a horrible person, but after what he's just seen, he was starting to change his mind so he could change his ways. To make sure he didn't fall down the rabbit's shithole like these other guys did.

'Those were Pride and Wrath, but there's 9 Sins. The 7 Deadly Sins and the 2 Archaic Sins. 9-2=7 more possible paths I might have, but which one will I see next? There's still Sloth, Greed, Gluttony, Envy, Lust, Melancholy, and Vanity. But why can't I wake up? Is this so I can learn my lesson? Is this a message to live the Virtues? God, Buddha, Satella, whoever's out there, please let me wake up. I promise I'll change; I won't do these things anymore.'

The dream void changed scenery. He was back at the Tea Party, sitting across Echidna. She had finished explaining her contract with him. In exchange for her knowledge, power, and even body; she'd use his Return By Death how she wished; so he could get his desired result, and she could have her knowledge. He Himself didn't take the contract because the other Witches explained what that implied, but this new version of him took the contract; grabbing her hand and felt a change in his soul.

He heard the new version's thoughts as he watched the Tea Party Realm fade. Since Echidna was the Witch of Greed, and the past visions have been about his deviation to sins, he guessed that this was a Greed What If.

'A dream, I saw a dream.

A dream that wouldn't fade, a dream that kept repeating, a dream with no end, a dream that wouldn't end.

Over and over again; many, many times over; repeating mistakes over and over; correcting them more and more. 1000 times, spinning. 10,000 times, connecting. 100 million times, overcoming them. And before knowing it, losing count.

Agony, terror, turbidity, ruin, hatred, madness.
Exhausted, shaken, twisted, corrupted, contorted, decayed, anguished; a heart smashed to pieces.

And yet, there was still a place I wanted to reach.
And yet, there was still a wish I wanted to protect.

Even if no one knew about the endless tragedies that repeated over and over, I will not forget. Even if no one notices, only I am unable to forget.

Even if the people I want to save wept, I still want to save them.'

'I took the contract, despite the risks.

I wanted a happy ending for all of us. I wanted it all, despite never wanting to do anything. Emilia the Queen, The Sanctuary liberated, The Great 3 dead, to wake up Rem, to make sure everyone lived to greet tomorrow with a smile.

So, I took her hand.

The Sanctuary was liberated, some Sin Archbishops are dead, 2 of the Great 3 Ma-Beasts are dead, The WaterGate City is safe, but Rem is still asleep.

I've died more than 100 million times.

I'll be the one who suffers so everyone gets their happy ending.'

Subaru felt his blood turn into an Al Huma at the sound of 100 Million deaths. A contract with Echidna? More Sin Archbishops dead? Rem still asleep. Why would it take so many tries? How did all that information stay attached to his soul and mind? He would mentally and spiritually be some 100 thousand years old being in an 18- or 19-year-old body. How strong would the Scent be? Would it be thick enough to be visible? To be able to touch it? For regular people to smell it?

The vision started, and he saw 'Greed', as he dubbed the variation, wake up on a couch in a room in Roswall's mansion. He felt the lack of enthusiasm in Greed, but an ember of perseverance. Greed was wearing a butler suit like the one he wore way back when at the mansion. He caught a glimpse of something on Greed's neck as he was getting off the couch. Something smooth, black, and almost shiny. A spirit housing crystal? Regular jewelry? A good luck charm?

He felt Greed's exhaustion, mostly in the face. Greed walked into the joint bathroom, looked at the mirror, and noticed that his face looked tired and frayed with dejection. Greed felt his facial muscles refuse to co-operate with him, so he splashed his face with cold water, slowly straining a fake smile. After a few minutes of trial and error, he managed to make a convincing fake smile. Satisfied, he walked back to the middle of the room, affirmed the time crystal was green and did before his scheduled wake-up call.

He grabbed the black crystal on his neck, held it till its strange pulse synchronized with his heartbeat, and felt as if something was being ripped off or out of him. His vision was dark for a bit, then a bright light shone through his eyelids. He opened his eyes to the familiar rolling green hills under the clean blue skies. A table with two chairs sat under an umbrella at the top of a small hill ahead of him, and he began to walk towards it.

Subaru felt something in the back of his brain, identifying it as a feeling of nostalgia arose. He finally remembered that this dreamscape looked a lot like the Windows XP background on the old computer his dad used to have. He gave a small mental smile on old and better days. Hopefully, he wouldn't have to see Greed suffer like Wrath and Pride did. One day at a time, one loop at a time, one death at a time. Slowly but surely. Baby steps.

Greed sat down in one of the chairs, noticed a cup of freshly brewed tea, and drank it without hesitation. It didn't taste very good, but it didn't taste disgusting, just bland. He knew what the tea was made with, but it had been long past the point he cared. Then a woman appeared across the table from him, The Witch of Greed, his contractor, Echidna.

His courtesy call went on for a bit, with him complementing that despite her title and reputation as a Witch and being a self-proclaimed "evil magic user" and a "shy, young, maiden girl as delicate as a flower," she wasn't as scary as some would believe. Even if she observed every waking moment of his life and deaths, she wasn't the worst company. He got what he came for; the date; 14th of Kisdam.

Subaru: That's right. To be honest, I know you're trying to help me in offering to stay here but...

He knew that this realm had extreme time-dilatation, so if he perceived about an hour here, only about 20 seconds would've past in the real world.

… It's not my plan to depend on you all the time. You should know that it's not that kind of contract.

…...

Subaru: By the way, just a moment ago, you didn't deny that you're always spying on me day and night?

Echidna: Hm? I thought I'd said, 'even if'?

Echidna knew they could both be annoying at times, but brushed off his comment and sipped on her tea.

Echidna: Is it not normal? I am not so vulgar to spy on you when you're taking a bath or using the bathroom. It's just that unless you're convinced that nothing will happen in these vulnerable situations, I think that it's impossible for me as your contractor to avert my eyes. In the end, it's my obligation as the Witch of Greed to faithfully uphold the contract-

Subaru: From now on, I'm removing the pendant when I go to the bathroom or wash myself.

Echidna began to rapid-fire excuses on why he shouldn't take off his necklace, but he ignored them. He wanted to get on with this loop, so he got out of his chair, and walked out the door Echidna materialized.

He came back to his senses in the real world, looking at the time crystal above the door, which had stayed the same hue of green before and after his visit, indicating that only a few seconds had passed. Despite doing this possibly as many times he's died, he still isn't used to the awkward effects of time-dilatation, even though temporal fuckery was his specialty.

He heard a buzzing in his ear, or a feeling in his head. He still wasn't sure what it was, but he knew all too well what was coming.

Echidna: What would you say to changing your mind and getting used to not getting used to it? Even if it's no more than for your peace of mind, maybe it'll make you feel a bit more at ease?

…...

Echidna: There's no one around. I don't think anyone is going to care you if you're directing your attention to me when you're alone in the room

Subaru: What would you do, if you did the same thing in public without thinking, and people saw me speaking to someone who isn't there and thought I was a weirdo?

Echidna: I feel like that's a new evaluation. But, besides, it's not unusual for spirits to converse their thoughts with their spirit-user. That isn't really suspicious.

Subaru: With spirit-users, both use their thoughts to communicate. In my case, it's just you and I'm stuck speaking aloud to myself. If you look at it from that way, it's pretty annoying

Echidna: Yeah yeah, I get it. As you wish, I'll be silent except for when necessary. You managed to make a witch obey… you're a master at this.

Subaru, clearly enraged: SHUT THE HELL UP.

Subaru couldn't believe what Greed had done. Ordering Echidna like he was shooing away a door-to-door used car salesman trying to loop him into a pyramid scheme. She might've been a young (in appearance) adult, but she was still an eldritch level power, a very formidable magic user that even Roswall, Puck, and Beako combined probably couldn't stop her. With every death and vision he has, he felt more and more like a COD Spectator; helplessly watching as his team-mates die for no good reason.

She would've appealed to his "type" back home when he was an otaku, and subconsciously probably still does, but he's had to abandon most of those tendencies since he crossed over, and learned very painfully not to trust appearances. And from that lesson, he learned that the most dangerous people, besides Reinhardt and Satella, were sometimes the lolis. Beatty, Carmilla, Typhon, Daphne, and though he didn't know yet, Pandora. His rule of thumb for this world was that the most unassuming people are usually the most dangerous.

'Type?' Subaru felt his immaterial face form the universally understood gesture of "Oh Shit!" All the tankobon, posters, figures, and his PC wallpaper in his room. All the white-haired women he used to acknowledge as waifus were just sitting in his room. He remembered how accepting his parents were of his strange memorabilia; they would look at his new poster of a scantily clad woman like it had always been part of his wall and go on with their day.

He knew that his parents loved him, and he knew that they were strange to accept him for how he lived. Although he lived a shut-in Hiki-NEET life, he wasn't the disobedient and ungrateful type. He made meals, did the dishes, washed laundry, ran errands, and did housework for his mom. He was grateful that his parents still let him live with them, even if he was a NEET. He wanted to do something with his life that would make them proud; to do something with his life that made himself proud.

He knew that if he was ever transported back home, preferably with his friends, the first thing he does is apologize to his parents. For suddenly disappearing; for not living up to expectations; for not being the son they needed. Then he would tell his friends to wait, and run like hell. He would run into his room, thinking, "OhShitOhShitOhShitOhShit," carrying a contractor bag. He would tear down all the bikini posters and toss the plastic figurines into the trash bag with the help of Invisible Providence.

He'd tie the most confusing knot he could make, layer the bag with duct-tape, and put it into another bag; before he would have Beako erase it with magic. He didn't want either worlds or his friends to know that he had eyes on anyone (thing) else besides Emilia, so he'd have it disappear with magic; preferably with Al Shamak (The Rabbit Zone/Realm), but he could live with the bag of questionable wonders removed from this plane of reality with a simple Goa.

There was a knock on the door, but he didn't need the previous loops to know who it was.

Petra: Good morning Subaru. Today's once again a splendid morning y'know.

She was an employee of Roswall; an assistant maid of Frederica, who Roswall summoned to (replace Rem) help Ram. She was his personal maid/assistant, despite himself being a butler. He took the time to notice she had physically and mentally grown in the 2 years (perceived by the world) since he met her in Arlam.

She smiled at him, greeting him to wake him up so they could start their duties. He gave her his rehearsed smile, hiding his true emotionless manner; absolutely desensitized from the millions of deaths.

Subaru: A good morning to you too, Petra. I agree, it's indeed a splendid morning. Today too, I was able to see Petra's cute face in the morning. I'm pretty satisfied too.

Petra: Subaru's still saying such things. … Ah, but there are clouds hanging over the sky beyond the forest, it seems that the weather may get worse this afternoon. I have plans to go shopping this afternoon, I hope it'll stay sunnyyyyyy.

He chuckled a bit at the fact that she occasionally slips a bit of immaturity into her actions and words. She went on about how she most certainly was an adult because she's been a maid for 2 years now, but he still shook her hair and giggled back at her; an attempt to maintain his façade and demeanor.

She sees him as a big brother, so he sees her as a cute little sister that do whatever it takes to keep her happy, while she does act as his alarm clock that takes small jabs at his strange behaviors.

He's long accepted the fact that she would wake him up regardless, so he started this loop's day's tasks. And after walking around to start his routine, he came across Garfiel having his daily morning spar with Reinhardt.

Swipe after punch after kick, he poured his unbridled violence into each attack against the glossy cherry haired knight. After a few minutes, Garfiel finally collapsed, with Reinhardt standing over him, asking if he wants to continue, offering "Samuri's Pity", whatever that meant.

Garfiel surrendered for today, because tomorrow, he'll be stronger, and a step closer to laying a hand on The Sword Saint. Reinhardt admired the demi-tiger boy for his fiery ambition and his steady progress. Today's results: Reinhardt wins.

They said their 'see you laters', Garfiel headed for the washroom to prevent the wrath of Ram, and they went about their plans for today. Greed hung back to talk with Reinhardt, remembering how frightening it was to have Reinhardt as a friend who stood as an enemy; his loyalty and service that formerly belonged to Felt, who had mysteriously disappeared with Rom, dropping from the race.

He served her for about a year after she became the 5th Candidate, then unexpectedly vanished, leaving the Knight of Knights to his lonesome; festering in his thoughts of uselessness, helplessness, and incompetence.

Since he had no purpose, Greed decided to take him into the Emilia Camp; strong with the backing of a Margrave, Roswall L. Mathers; a butler that always achieved the best possible outcome, and now stronger with The Sword Saint.

Everyone knew why Garfiel pointlessly spared with Reinhardt; to make up for his inability to protect The Sanctuary, and to vent his ever-increasing anger and depression by getting stronger.

It wasn't the most ideal outcome, but it was the best outcome deduced by the newly contracted and dysfunctional duo of Subaru and Echidna. Yes, they forcefully liberated Sanctuary. Yes, they damaged Garfiel's will and pride. Yes, he killed the Great Rabbit. But at what costs?

Echidna interrupted his train of thought, violating her recently made promise, annoying Subaru. She pointed out to him that Garfiel is like this because of how he liberated Sanctuary, and how getting Reinhardt was the best course of action to repel and destroy the Witch Cult to keep Emilia safe.

He died dozens of times over by the discarded Reinhardt, finally able to prevent his death, preventing him from throwing away Reid, and gain his trust; obtaining the best possible outcome.

He didn't care how much or how many times he added weight to his already burdened heart of fool's gold; as long as he saved people's lives, he didn't care who he aligned with, as long as they could mutually benefit each other

Subaru: There's life, if there's life, there's a future, if there's a future, there's hope, if there's hope, then there are possibilities. If there are possibilities, then-

If he didn't risk himself to contribute to his best possible ending, then what would've been the point of taking her hand?

Life was life; if he was alive, he could start over, leaving possibilities, leaving hope for a better future for them all. He would utilize Returning by Death if it protected everyone. He'll take on their suffering; as long as he wasn't the source of their suffering, he'd take on any burden for them and not let himself become a burden.

'Even if those who I want to save weep, I still want to save them.'

That was the salvation that Subaru had decided to receive by taking the witch's hand. The best possible outcome never had sacrifices too great, so he decided to become their sacrificial lamb so they wouldn't burden themselves.

He deemed it not pointless to deviate from his daily routine by watching the boys fight, so he headed off to start his proper routine by heading to the eastmost part of the mansion, and found the room he was looking for, pushing open heavy wooden double doors.

He was met by the familiar wave of the smell of books, the only lighting being the dim magic crystals hanging from chandeliers and the walls. What was once a pocket dimension filled with endless shelves of books containing enough knowledge to last several lifetimes, was reduced to a non-magically isolated room containing a few shelves and a couple piles of leather-bound pages.

The room, enshrouded by its former glory, was occupied by a single being. A little girl with cream colored drill hair, wearing a red and white frilled dress, her head tucked into her knees. She didn't acknowledge him as he walked into her room and to the stepladder she skulked on. She didn't register his existence as he greeted her.

Subaru: Hey, Beako...

Beatrice: ...just shut the hell up, in fact

Greed looked at her in surprise. She had told him to shut the hell up and piss off in quite a loud tone and a hoarse voice; a miracle considering she hardly even spoke. Ever since the fire in the mansion had destroyed the Forbidden Library and his declaration of not being her "they", whoever "they" even was, she had secluded herself to the farthest corner of her makeshift library.

Lonely, depressed, and suicidal. He said he wasn't her "they", she rarely spoke or moved, and all she wanted now, was to die, after 400 years of lonely, monotonous waiting. For whom? For what? Someone to end her existence, cut her free from her promise? Waiting, waiting, waiting... for the "they" her mother had promised that would come and save her, someone that she would trust and pass on the troves of knowledge.

For 400 years, she waited. Waiting in the Library containing all her mother's knowledge: various secrets of countries, hidden treasures, forbidden magic, experimental spells, history; anything that could be learned was kept in this sizeable pocket dimension, protected by a small blonde girl.

For 400 years, she sat there, protecting the hundreds of leather-bound tomes, scrolls, books, and tablets. She sat there on her little step ladder, sitting in front of her Barrier Door Crossing; waiting slowly for the next person to wander into her near infinite library. The Mathers decedents, maids, visitors, and occasionally thieves, would cross her reality shifting room.

For 400 years, she did nothing. Nothing but sit on her step ladder; reading the things mother left behind; reading from The Tome; eating snacks; waiting to talk to the next intruder, wanting company, waiting in front of the door for "they" to rescue her.

She though the boy would be her "they", as he was always breaking her Door Crossing on purpose or accident. The only people that ever kept her company for her 400 years were the Mathers descendants, the occasional maid, Bubby, and then the strangest of all; Subaru Natsuki.

He was loud, obnoxious, and always in a playful mood. Breaking her magic everyday; sometimes to talk to her, sometimes to try and play with her, sometimes to dispel his mysterious and irrational fear. His Witch's Scent was intolerable, but at least he was aware of it, staying in one spot to minimize the spread of the repulsive smell.

Each time he came, he was always friendly and polite, never seeing her as a lesser being. He gave her a nickname, Beako, which she secretly loved; he wanted to bring her food; he wanted to play with her drill hair; he wanted to read with her, despite being illiterate; he wanted to just be with her. She wanted him to be the one that freed her, to be the one that said, "I am your they, come with me."

And what did she do to him? She shot him with wind or shooed him out. She wanted him to stay with her, for him to declare he was her "they", never saying that she wanted his company; always forcing him out because of some stupid reason. She wanted to reveal her feelings of companionship, longing to spend more time with him. A Great Spirit can't be friends with a mortal, can they? Spirits are effectively immortal, and humans hardly live past 80. A lifetime of memories for a mortal is no different than her blinking as time marches on.

Could he have been her "they"? She wished to the Witches and OD that he was, but that dream went up in smoke faster than the Library. He smelled worse with each second; he always faked a convincing smile; his eyes became tired and dead; and he said that there was no way he could be her "they", and she should stop waiting for them.

She took his advice, finally accepting that he wasn't her "they", and "they" didn't exist. There was no point to her promise to mother now, since the Library of Her Knowledge had been reduced to ash in the winds.

She hated him for what he did, and now, she was waiting for something else. Waiting for an assassin to end her; waiting for one of the members of the half-elf's silly camp to put her down; waiting for her mana to dissipate. She couldn't do it herself, as the promise is technically still valid. So she sat there, never looking up, hardly reading her mother's books, not able to read the now destroyed Tome she had gifted her.

She wanted to be left alone, wishing he would've spent more time with her; wishing she enjoyed more time with him. But there was no chance of that now.

…...

Hearing her voice made him feel lucky this loop, so he decided to test his luck by giving her a hug. She wanted him out, or dead, but all she could do was scratch his neck, still disgusted by him, drawing blood with each swipe of her nails. She swung her nails at his neck, but he didn't seem to notice. She wanted to make him suffer as much as she could, and used her nails anytime he came close.

She would vent any way and time she could, as there was nothing left for her to protect, and no one to wait for. The only thing she could do, was die. Waiting till she would dissipate into mana, her conscious fading to nothing; waiting for this nightmare to end for good.

'Anything for her to ease her suffering.'

Subaru looked at Greed's Beatrice, wondering what exactly went through his head that made him think that Beatrice suffering was the best possible outcome. He remembered one of his failed loops, where he said he was her "they". She then commit suicide by Elsa, satisfied to have fulfilled her purpose, satisfied to bring closure to her never-ending cycle of misery.

It took a bit longer to have her take his hand; with the Guiltylowe, Elsa, Meili, the Trials, and the White Rabbit in the way. In his successful loop, she took his hand and contract, despite him not being her "they", despite him having a short lifespan when compared to her's.

When she blinked, he'll be dead, like all the others; so even if it was for a moment, he promised that he'll make it his moment in her memory, so that after he's done and gone, she'll think back to happier times; so he'll do the best he can to make the best of his moment.

Echidna explained to Greed that she had no idea who "they" even was, doubting that "they" exist. The purpose of the promise was for Beatrice to decide who her "they" were, so she would learn to become independent. The Tome was meant to assist, not dictate her. Almost no one in 400 years knew her or the prospect of a contract with The Witch of Greed, so it was a statistical improbability for someone to meet Beatrice and address themselves as her "they".

He said his goodbyes, still wanting to play her, but went off with his routine. And as he was doing his butlery duties, Roswall walked out from a hall, and came close to him, noticing how he should get Beatrice, Garfiel, or Emilia to close his wounds before they would stunt his capabilities or got infected.

Roswall knew that Subaru could see into the future somehow, but never spoke it. They came to the silent and mutual agreement that he knew that he had an ability that let him, and he quietly dubbed it Redo. And with his indispensable power, they had managed to tip the balance of the Royal Race to Emilia's favor. Their feats that they claim to share are non-other than the result of Subaru's schemes and suffering. Subaru truly was his most valuable tool; one he would never throw away.

If he could, he might've respected Subaru, and Subaru did seem to show some degree of respect for him. Their mutual agreement displayed itself in the others, as Ram had now begun to acknowledge Subaru as her greater. She hated it, she'd rather see him suffer slowly and painfully whilst kept alive with magic. But by orders and notions of Roswall, she did otherwise.

A/N: In Japanese, honorifics are added to the end of a spoken name. Thats's why you see (-san, -kun, -sama, -chan, etc.) in Jap. Media.

In this case, since Subaru is technically Ram's superior, she addresses him by "Subaru-sama", implying that he is above her.

In a more general case, Rem calls him "Subaru-kun" to show her love and affection. Or Subaru calling Emilia, "Emilia-tan", Mili if you do dub.

Greed finished his conversation with Roswall and began to head to what the other thought was his second favorite room. The room with a sleeping blue-haired stranger, Rem, presumably erased by a Sin Archbishop of Gluttony according to Subaru. It should've been impossible for Subaru to know who the stranger was, as there are no records or memories of her existence; other than the Mathers manor's standard maid uniform she wore, and Subaru's account.

Everyone accepted the idea that Subaru really did know who "Rem" was. He's always saying that she's Ram's younger sister; a twin single-horned Oni, unlike the horn-less Oni Ram; and she was a Mathers maid. They also accepted the idea that knowing who new people were or events that would take place was one of Subaru's strange traits.

He was weird himself: black hair; sudden appearance with no knowledge of their customs; he knew the language, claiming to be a native speaker and to come from a country that couldn't/ didn't possibly exist; labor-less hands; he was illiterate; his dialect similar to the Kararagian; and he knew things before he could've encountered them, such as their names when he arrived, their schedules, position, what they would eat later; his reliable and accurate predictions and prowess made him irreplaceable in peace-time and combat.

He seemed to be deeply connected to "Rem", clearly loving her. Was she his betrothed? Wife? Long lost relative? No one knew, other than that what he's said; she's Ram's younger twin sister, she was a maid of this mansion, and they were the ones that led the Hunt on The Whale and Betelgeuse, only for her to be erased by a Gluttony Sin Archbishop. If she was erased by Gluttony, then why does only he remember?

They believed him, never doubting his knowledge and information, as it had never failed them before, and whenever he had a plan, that was the path the future held and the only path that would take place.

He called Echidna, letting her remind him how he could wake Rem up.

Echidna: You could question the Sin Archbishop of Gluttony that put her in this sleep. But, I have to say, the likelihood of that is quite low. Finding those guys is next to impossible, and even if you do catch them, finding a way to beat their secrets out of them… Even if you were to just able to find a way to talk to them, maybe it would be easy to find a way to make them open their mouth, if you had the power…

Subaru: Ah, that's right. That's right of course. If I manage to find them, and catch them, and beat their secrets out of them to reawaken Rem, I can challenge them ten thousands of times. Even so…

The Sin Archbishops of Wrath, Greed, and Lust appeared at The WaterGate City, but not Gluttony. He's called favors, hired people, and looked himself for any lead on the whereabouts of them, but they all drew blanks.

Subaru: If tracking down Gluttony is hopeless, what about the Sage's Tower? If the Sage Shaula knows everything, then…

Echidna: As a witch, I will say this. Even if you do go to the Pleiades Watchtower, you'll just be going on a fool's errand. The Sage will not correspond to your expectations. On the contrary, there's even the possibility that the Sage will not allow your presence. Even you should not wish to drop in there to die in vain, right?

He was denied once. He was denied twice. He was stuck. Getting help from the Sage was a no-go. The Archbishops of Gluttony were nowhere to be found. Subaru's wishes were denied politely by the Witch of Greed. Then, what on earth should he do-

Echidna: So, you have no choice but to get the blood of the dragon.

…...

Echidna: I refer to the Divine Dragon's. Using its omnipotent power kept in its blood, I think you should be able to release the girl's soul from her sleep.

Getting Volcanica's blood was about as impossible as injuring Reinhardt; maybe less difficult, but still an absurd task. The Divine Dragon only ever revealed itself to the Royal Family or the current throne holder, and only if they were worthy of its godly presence. Its blood is rumored to have the power to revitalize the ground tainted by The Black Serpent, reverse aging, bring bountiful harvests, cure the deadliest of diseases and curses, and by some accounts, even grant miracles or wishes.

He needs to make Emilia Queen by whatever means; giving him access to Divine Dragon's Blood; which would let him wake Rem up; and after Rem wakes up, she would thank Subaru for what he did for her and Emilia; therefore-

Echidna stopped him in his thoughts, trying to convince him otherwise in order to change him to abandon his ideals and his image of those he has.

He'll wake Rem up, no matter how long he has to wait. Whether its 200 or 200 million more deaths, he'll have Emilia ascend so he could save Rem. He'll die as many times as it takes, taking upon everyone's suffering for them.

He went to the last spot for his daily duties, and knocked on the door for a few minutes.

?: Jeez, how long are you going to do that for! It's making me reaaaaally anxious.

The voice moves closer to the door, and hidden behind it was a familiar silver-haired and amythest-eyed woman; the embodiment of true beauty, a beauty that would eternally captivate all there is.

He became entranced by her, staring deep her jewel-like eyes, her short and rounded elven ears, nose, mouth, and hair; absorbing every little detail. He remembered that before he came to this new world, he was a weird boy, an otaku, with an unrealistic obsession with white hair, believing that it represented purity.

After he came to this world, he met Emilia on accident and coincidence. Although she was in a hurry and acted in a calculated manner to find her Royal Insignia, she spent precious time to heal the then beaten boy. The idea she gave him was that in exchange for treatment, he would provide information about the Insignia's thief or help her search for said thief. He realized that her pure-hearted and innocent ways won't let her get anywhere, so he helped her.

After her appearance and help, he started using the playful nickname, Emilia-tan, and an equally playful expression, EMA; Emilia-tan Maji Tenshi.

A/N: Translation of EMT; EMA, Emilia (is a) Major Angel.

She made her trademark pouting face; puffing her rosy cheeks and pursing her lips, while making the 'I am ignoring you in anger' face. He didn't know she was making her face, but laughed regardless.

Emilia: Ah, what are you laughing for? Ugh, Subaru's such a twit.

Subaru: Twit… no one says that word anymore these days. It was Emilia-tan that started to return the knocks just before. I just went with the flow.

Emilia: You say it like that. Hmph, whatever. Then if it's like that, I just won't let Subaru into my room.

Emilia tried to close the door, annoyed from Subaru speaking through his laughter. Subaru became anxious, not sure if she would let him in, so he put his hand in between the door-

Subaru: OWWW

Emilia jumped at Subaru's over-exaggerated shriek of pain after having had his fingers jammed in the door. Quickly jumping out of the room, she hurriedly grabbed Subaru's aching right hand, and...

Emilia: *Nom nom nom*

Subaru: Ehh, Emilia-tan!? Isn't that a little bold!?

He felt her tounge wrap around his nearly broken fingers, and felt his blood rushing up and down his body, heading to 2 places in particular. He hoped that she wouldn't notice.

Emilia: Mhm….that should be fine, I think. Subaru, it must've hurt…. Hey, why is your face bright red?

Subaru: I can't help acting like a young teen, or how should I put it… it was such an unexpected development… uhh, well, I'm okay. Thank you very much. This should be good enough for me.

Emilia: ――? I'm not sure if I understood that, but I should start using my healing magic, right?

She held his hands out, letting out a warm blue aura from hers. He immediately felt the pain-suppression and healing of her magic, and when it was over, his only concern was his still wet digits. She quickly brought out her handkerchief, happily patting it around the fingers to dry them.

After she was done, she looked up to meet his gaze, but stopped as she locked onto the thin scab lines across his neck. Her soft purple eyes sharpened in concern and anger, having an idea about who did this to her precious butler.

Emilia: Subaru, that looks painful. What happened here?

Subaru: Ah, Aaaah, This? I just got my neck caught on something on the way he-

Emilia: Liar.

She interrupted him, cutting short his usual attempt to be the "Smooth Operator" he claimed to be. She readjusted her eyes back to his fingers, stroking them to ease the pain she overlooked.

Emilia: It was Beatrice, wasn't it?

Her voice, once as warm and soft as an angel, now replaced with a none of murderous intent. Heart-broken that he was intentionally injured by an esteemed member of her Camp. Angry that anyone would dare lay a hand on her Subaru with the intention of hurting him so severely. Confused at why he didn't come to her after the fact.

There was no preparing for what came next. The hallway that led to her room, her room, and Subaru began to be enveloped in an icy cocoon. A wave of pure grief would eventually wash over the whole mansion, leaving no survivors but her and The Sword Saint.

Subaru: Emilia! Look at me!

Emilia: ... ah.

The burning pressure from the frosty air ceased to emanate from her body as her butler held her tight, screaming in her ears to stop doing something so dangerous.

If he hadn't stopped her, Reinhardt would've had to come bursting through the door and put her down, most likely with his sword, Reid. The sword was strange, possibly sentient, because it would glow when the possessor is faced with an opponent the sword (supposedly) deems worthy, permitting the possessor to draw it from its ornate scabbard.

Subaru remembered back to one of his trials at The Sanctuary. He saw what became of the loops he died in: people grieving for him; people going into fits of rage or sadness; and one specific death came to mind. The Greater Fire Spirit grew in size, and became violent towards him because of something beyond his control; Emilia's death.

The intensity of Emilia's ice brought him vivid memories. He felt the loop come back to him. He was standing there at the entrance to the front "yard" of the mansion, Rem dead in his arms.

Witch Cultists, villagers, animals, and mansion inhabitants laid slew across the frozen grass and in the snow-covered trees: spires and streams of frozen blood poured from the bodies; the children of the village butchered, their playful eyes now gouged; Cultists, or pieces of them, sprinkled the icy hellscape.

The Beast of the End could be seen behind the mansion, over-shadowing the décor and architecture; spotlights on its face focused on the boy holding a blue-haired maid, snap-freezing and decapitating the young man; his head rolled of his shoulders and his body fell to its knees.

The domain had been siphoned of mana, dropping the ambient temperature to absolute zero; razor-sharp snowflakes cut through the air and threatened anything that stood. Neither man nor Ma-Beast could survive in these conditions, but what stopped the Apocolyptic entity was neither.

The trial showed him what became of that. A tall human body of average build; sporting a standard Guardsman uniform; a head of glossy cherry-red hair; a broad-sword rested in the marble-white scabbard to his hip. The grass crunched under his footsteps, leaving footprints that quickly filled with snow. He looked around to assess the destruction caused by it, realizing that he was too late to save the one of the few people that treated him as a regular person,

The Sword Saint had come to slay The Beast, and Reid had judged it worthy. The Boy loved by The World stepped forward to confront the being, and drew the sword.

He raised it over his head, mana and spirits coming to his aid, empowering the already Legendary Sword with a purifying light. He swung the sword in a downwards arc directed at The Beast, the imbued power released.

The Beast was annihilated, disappearing with the snow it spawned. The once barren ice planes of the domain once again flourished with greenery and animals, restored to its original majesty.

Subaru remembered all too well about the loop Greed remembered; Puck froze him in 3 consecutive loops because of Satella's handy work. It wasn't till after he talked to Echidna about the Trial that he realized that it would've been impossible for him to take that Trial; the overlapping and potential time-lines of Return By Death gave him the cruelest handicap for a challenge where he had to "Behold an unthinkable present."

He saw what became of the loops after his death. But which present was he supposed to see? All of them? Some of them? What was it that he was supposed to see? Did Return send him back in time in this reality, or did it send him back to the past in similar and separate time-line?

Emilia I… I… n-now… eh…?

Subaru: It's okay, it's okay. Emilia-tan is a good girl, a good girl, everything is okay.

Greed sat down to face a sitting Emilia. As she clutched her head, unable to understand what had happened, he patted her on the back in an attempt to calm her down.

Gradually, Emilia's breathing regained its composure, and then she looked at Subaru's face timidly and said:

Emilia: S-sorry? I... acted weird again…

Subaru: It's alright. Because any troubles hoisted by Emilia-tan aren't troubles at all. That's the role I want to take. Don't worry.

Emilia: Y-yeah.

Emilia nodded happily at his words. He wouldn't let go of her body until her heart truly settled down.

Greed noted that Emilia's emotional instability was influenced by the fact that she utterly failed the Trials back at Sanctuary.

In the end, he didn't know what she saw in the First Trial; the Trial that showed glimpses of one's past. Whatever she saw broke her, and she couldn't overcome the trials, so it was up to him to complete them in her stead.

Therefore, Emilia's progress was probably still trapped in the graveyard even now. But, no matter for how long she rejects everything, and no matter how long she mourns, time marches on.

Neither the world, nor her surroundings, nor anyone would let her off with her stagnation. That's why he continued to take Emilia by the hand, even when she'd refused to go on.

Emilia: Sorry, Subaru. I'm still causing Subaru trouble…

Subaru: It's okay, it's no problemo, no problem at all. Rather, it makes me feel welcome.

Emilia: …hehe, aww, Subaru. Mhm, thank you. I'm okay, I've calmed down.

With a brief hug, Emilia lifted her face from his chest. The girl's warmth left his chest, and Greed stiffened his lips with a regretful look.

Subaru: Damnit. I wanted to enjoy Emilia-tan's softness just a little while more.

Emilia: Huuh, would that be better? If Subaru says so, I will do so.

Subaru: Nononono, it's fine. You see, this is a trick I use quite often to cope with dissatisfaction. Gorging yourself until full is for cattle. I think rather than a pig in its sty, I'm more like a wolf who is chasing after its prey.

Greed calmed down Emilia with their absurd exchange. She now had a smile back on her face. Luckily, it seemed like she had forgotten the anger she had shown just a few moments ago at his wounds.

Subaru was still in shock about their differences of continuity; Greed never properly saved Emilia. She took him back to the loop where she held him in her arms as he bled out from his multiple wounds; she held him in her arms and gave him a kiss, uncaring that he would've been her corpse groom.

'The Kiss Of Death... can't and won't forget that it didn't take much to drive her off the edge and end up with... that.' He wondered why Greed wasn't in much danger as Pride or Wrath. The variations had distinct yet similar magnetic personalities, like himself. Always ending up hurt or dead; and with the routes taken by Greed, he figured that hundreds, if not thousands, of people were itching to unknowingly send Greed back to the past.

Echidna: I can't bear to look at this.

Subaru: Shut up.

Emilia: ――Huh?

Subaru: Ah, I wasn't saying that to Emilia-tan. Sorry, I was talking to myself.

Greed instinctively and verbally replied to Echidna's thought waves, surprising Emilia. Naturally, the thoughts through the crystal stone reached only Subaru. Echidna's contempt and disdain, who openly expressed her dislike of Emilia, also only reached her contractor.

Emilia: W― would it be better for me to shut up? If that's what Subaru wants, I will do my best to stay quiet…

Subaru: It's not like that! It's fine, so let's talk a lot, okay? It's okay if you talk.

Emilia: …Really?

Her amethyst eyes started to swell with tears, and when Greed nodded, Emilia let out a sigh of relief, once again taking his hand.

Emilia: Well then, tell me Subaru... What should I do today?

Subaru: ….

Emilia: Yesterday, I finished studying in my room as you told me to do. If it's something Subaru says, there's no doubt I will do it. So, can you tell me what should I do today?

She does what Subaru says; if it's Subaru's call, she knows she won't make any mistakes; she whole-heartedly relied on his intuition and decision-making skills.

Greed struggled to keep his fake smile from disappearing after hearing her words. His practiced life-saving smile was put on the spot here.

By utilizing Return by Death, he had completely eliminated all the obstacles that stood before Emilia. He had understood that Emilia had not contradicted how she had gained his trust; he had gotten this far doing that. She clung to him and having recognized that she was in such a terribly unstable state, he had tried to Return, but no matter how much he tried, he couldn't Return to the Sanctuary.

But all routes considered, he didn't think this situation was the worst.

Subaru: Well then, I'll please ask this of Emilia-tan. Today, just like yesterday, keep up your studies! If I do something important again, I'll let you know beforehand.

Emilia: Like in Pristella?

Subaru: Yeah, like in Pristella. Until then, you need to keep learning. Preparing for an emergency, and boosting your own morale, those are assuredly the most important things Emilia-tan can do now.

Emilia enthusiastically agreed with Subaru, who had put on this dramatic spiel. She had accepted his command with something resembling a salute.

Emilia: So could you stroke my head, if I do that?

Subaru: …

She said this with embarrassment and a dash of anxiety in her eyes which were peeking at her butler. Just for a moment, he stood absolutely still. If that moment continued for any longer, it'd be easy to imagine the despair creeping into her eyes.

But luckily, he had put on his "smile" before that could happen.

Subaru: Of course? But what if I ask for permission to touch Emilia-tan's silver hair?

Emilia: …...? If Subaru wants to touch it, he can touch it any time he wants…

Subaru: S―i―n―c―e! Since it mustn't come as a reward. When good things happen, then I can promise to. I will stroke Emilia-tan. Okay?

She awkwardly nodded to Greed's confirmation as he gave her a thumbs up and smiled with his brilliant teeth. She still held his hand, refusing to let him go.

Subaru: Aaah, since Petra will bring the food up, let's eat together.

Emilia: Yeah, I'll be waiting. Well, I'll see you later!

Emilia went back into her room, having to let go of him. Seeing her shortened silver hair, Greed resisted the urge to let out a long sigh. When the door shut behind her, their connection had been physically cut away.

Echidna: Good grief, there are bounds even for ugliness

Greed was getting real tired of Echidna's contract breaking antics; she still verbally abused the young half-elf through the silent pulses in his head. It didn't take Greed long to figure out that by maintaining a stubborn attitude, Echidna would shut up, as there was no one for her to annoy or talk to.

At the end of the day, he walked back to his room; needing to do a progress check with Echidna. Maybe he'll get some sleep tonight, or die and restart from the current random checkpoint.

?: Oh my, it seems like you came back in a hurry.

He went into his room and closed the door behind him. He lifted his head up towards the voice that was coming from within the room. A dark-haired woman was sitting on his bed smiling, and gently brushed her hand across her long braided hair.

?: I should have been back on time, seeing you here, it seems I'm in quite the pickle.

Subaru: …...Elsa.

Elsa: Yeah, that's right. I immediately came running, as Master ordered. I wonder, is there trouble?

Saying that, the scantily clad assassin exposed her feminine body, seductively tilting her head towards him, wondering what his current orders were.

Even though she wasn't an ally he could relax his guard around, she was still an ally. He couldn't let anything distract him from achieving his goals.

Subaru: I helped you out of the burning mansion. I give you work because of that.

Elsa: I understand. I don't have any issues with you now that you're my employer. I request only that you chose things that don't go as far as being against my hobbies …but for now, I have no complaints.

Emilia who stood as the head of the camp, an incorruptible symbol.
Reinhardt who was the Sword Saint, subject to unwavering public opinion.
And Natsuki Subaru, who had saved hundreds in his extensive list of blood-less campaigns.

Unlike those three, who couldn't act freely lest they tarnish their reputation, Elsa had many opportunities to get her dirty hands dirty. Of course, although you could call it dirty work, the work she did was a necessary evil...

Elsa: I'm sorry to report, but, it seems like Gluttony was nowhere to be seen at the place you sent me to. There was nothing but rabbles of ordinary Witch Cultists there… although, I did set them all free.

Subaru: Aah. You can do as you like. …But… In the end, it was a dud?

He frowned, dissatisfied with today's report. The Sin Archbishops of Gluttony were still in the wind, meaning he had no chance of discovering whether they could reverse the Gluttony Authority's effects.

Subaru: …Anyway, I understood your report. For now, stay on standby until I need you again. I will get in touch with you from here once more when I want to request something of you again.

Elsa: Okay. ――Well, I suppose I'll have to wait.

She had her orders, he had a loop to manage; it was time to get moving. But he had a nagging question he needed an answer to.

Subaru: This isn't anything too important. If you came from outside… how was the weather beyond the forest? Was it raining or was it clear?

Elsa: The weather? Eeh, there was no particular issue with it. Although there are clouds out, there's no need to worry about it getting worse. Is that all?

Subaru: No.

Cocking his head to the side, Subaru gazed at the time crystal in his room. It was already fire time, past 7 o'clock Solar; way past noon.

Subaru: I want to ask you to do something... Please lop off my head with that knife.

Elsa: …...Your head… I wonder… have you lost it already?

…...

Elsa: As a rule of thumb, people who have their heads lopped off typically die you know.

Subaru: I suppose I also apply to that rule. I don't know about you though.

Elsa: I think I would also die if my head were to come off. …Are you sure about this?

Subaru: I should have said this when I helped you. ――I will ask for a single unrelated thing, so listen to what I have to say then. Right now's the time.

She tilted her head and starred confused at the nasty-eyed butler asking for suicide. But it was an order from her employer, so she had no obligation to refuse.

Elsa: Any last words?

Subaru: Make it painless.

…..…..

Subaru: Ah, also, after I die you can do whatever you want with my guts, but don't lay a finger on anyone in the mansion. Well in any case, that's why I have Reinhardt arou-

His words were cut short like his body and head. Elsa's skill with her signature Gustekan-made kukri effortlessly decapitated the tired butler; a cut so clean, butchers and deli handlers would've had wet dreams about it.

'Cleaning the room is going to be hard on Petra.'

His view in this loop was instantly limited to rolling on the floor, his body slowly slumping over. The ruby stump pulsated, leaking with each second passing. If he did enter a new time-line after death, then he felt bad about having to leave his corpse behind like this; leaving it behind for Petra to clean, wondering who would do anything bad to her big brother.

His vision went dark, and his consciousness drifted into Satella's Garden of Shadows just for a moment. He knew it didn't take long for the next loop to start, but the problem was where and when the current loop would start.

He Returned, but to when and where? He woke up in his room, on the sofa. It was dark outside, so he checked the time crystal.

'Light green, so early morning. But which morning?'

He held his pendant, waiting for it to take him under and into Echidna's Dream Castle, or Realm. He wasn't exactly sure himself.

He blacked out, then felt the warm glow of an artificial sun on his eyes. He walked up the familiar hills and sat down in his seat yet again. She was already there; sitting in her chair, drinking her "special blend" of tea, watching him walk up to his chair, but stayed quiet.

He tried to engage in conversation, but she smugly grinned at him, bordering a stifled laugh; quietly chuckling almost like a child hiding, watching their friends pass by and fail to find their spot.

He looked down at the freshly brewed cup of "Dona Tea"; luring him with its amber reflection; mocking him with its unassuming warmth; daring him to drink.

Subaru: Damn it, I'll drink it, I'll drink it!

He picked up his designated cup, held a bold face, and shot it backwards; finishing it in one shot; draining the liquid in a single swallow like he was a hen-

…..

-Crusader.

He instantly regretted every moment of existence of his former and new life. He wished that Satella would take him now, or his soul would breakdown in this realm. He wished for the universe to reach its snapping point; instantly collapsing and going through the inevitable heat death. He wished for God, Buddha, Allah, Cthulhu, or whoever the fuck was out there to end his inevitable misery.

Woe is him; he is suffering incarnate; end his never-ending struggle; release him from the mortal plane; he knows hell; he's seen the faces of gods and death on numerous occasions, and simply yawned.

Greed was choking on the tea that had gone down his windpipe, so much so that Echidna had stood up from her seat in a rush. She ran around her tea-table and began to pat the dead-man's back, an effort to subside his violent hacking, to prevent him from dry drowning.

Subaru: Eh, what about the tea?

Echidna: Hh, it's fine this time. Also, the tea I worked so hard to brew, was puked out by you, I really can't put anything past you. And the table too, letting it stay dirtied like this is a pity.

Echidna sighed slightly in disappointment as Subaru wiped his mouth with his sleeve. She looked at her small tea-table now covered in fluid from two people. She snapped at its general direction, and both watched it crumble into dust, blown away by the breeze of her realm.

Echidna: Come now, you even dirtied the chair a bit. A man who'd dare to make me stand while talking is rare indeed… truly, you're a sinful man.

Subaru: Choking and spitting out the tea is no big deal! Compared to that, we have more important things to discuss.

…...

Subaru: What day is it today? It must be... The 14th of Kisdam, right?

Echidna: ….

Subaru: Echidna?

Echidna: I just wanted to make you a bit anxious. If you are too impatient, things will escape from you.

Subaru: …...Echidna

She simply shrugged her shoulders in acceptance and just a tad of futility.

Echidna: That's correct. Don't worry. Your Death brought you back to the morning of this day. It looks like your latest starting point was affixed to the morning of this day. Were you sure of that?

Greed was relieved as he could be, showing as much emotion as his state would let him. It's been so long since he's had some resemblance of real emotion that he's even forgotten what it's like to be relived.

Subaru: No, I wasn't particularly sure. At the worst, I thought I'd gone back to the previous save point.

Echidna: Your previous one was set at two months ago. You did so many good things using your powers.

Subaru: Maybe. Even Elsa is surprised every time, what an unfathomable feeling.

Elsa, the busty black-haired Gustekan; professionally known as The Bowel Hunter, for her preferred killing method of disembowelment via her Gustekan-specialty knives. It's unclear how long exactly she's been working or even how old she is, but there are a few known things about The Bowel Hunter, besides being a woman of remarkable beauty. She loves intestines; she loves killing; she is ruthlessly efficient. You know when you've been struck by The Bowel Hunter when you collapse into a gory pile of

Greed and Echidna knew that back on Earth, those blades of her's would've been called kukri. Despite their strange shape, they were an iconic blade; a staple part of a survival kit; recognizable world-wide, almost as renown as the Avtomat Kalashnikova.

She was as loyal to him as an assassin could be to their contractor. Although he didn't always order her to kill, she proved to have use as a tail and recon. She did sometimes wonder why he gave her such strange missions, some of which made her compare his sanity to that of a member of the radical branch of the Witch Cult. But at the end of the day, she still obeyed; making her an excellent means of using Return by Death.

Subaru: It's just that Return by Death led back to this morning.

Echidna: That's right. So it seems… If that's the case, it looks like problems may soon spring forth again.

Slowly but surely, he progressed to the next loop, no matter how many times he died. He would wake up, do his job, die or sleep, and start over. He feels a little better about himself with every advancement he makes, as repeating the same string of events gradually become tiring, so it was a good thing the checkpoint finally updated.

Subaru: With all your might… it'd be nice if you could help me with just that.

Echidna: …A witch wouldn't fall under someone's palm. If I simply do as instructed, it'll set a poor example for the other witches.

She made a decent point. What would happen to her reputation if it became public knowledge that one of the most powerful of the most evil people to ever exist was being controlled by a young man with a permanent deadpan look.

Subaru: Anyhow, I will count on you, Witch of Greed.

Echidna: I am sure you will. I will wait here for you to affront the impending turmoil. If you are able to, being more cooperative in satisfying my endless curiosity would make me happy indeed…

Subaru: I refuse to do that. If I went along with satisfying your endless curiosity, it'd be just a matter of time until the human parts of me wither and die. Who would try to satisfy you in trying out infinite choices?

Echidna: Truly a pity.

Every day is an uphill battle for Greed. He balances his duties as a butler, a contractor of a Witch, his emotional instability, and finding a concrete reason to keep going with the loops.

Echidna: Come to think of it…

Subaru: Yeah?

Echidna: If you hadn't grasped that the point of Return changed, why did you expressly use Return by Death?

Subaru: Aah, that was because―

Because...

He felt his consciousness return to his body, still discomforted about its jetlag-esque effects. Time to start this loop.

The Time Crystal was still light green, meaning he still had time left. He brushed his teeth, practiced his "smile", got dressed, and made his bed.

The dull wooden echo of a knock reached his ears, but he continued to tidy this loop's room. He already knew who it was, so he put on his fake smile in hopes that she'll be happy again.

Subaru: Hey, good morning, Petra. You look cute this morning too.

The door quickly opened, revealing the young maid standing at the frame. Her uniform had some miscolored spots, indicating that she had been working for some time today.

Petra: Jeez, please don't surprise me like that.

Subaru: I'm sorry I'm sorry. Well, Petra. Aren't you going to greet me?

With as much enthusiasm as she could use, she got her big brother out of his room so he could begin his duties. With as much confidence and emotion he could have, comparable to a partaker of a bizarre adventure, he knew what she was going to say next.

Petra: Really, you can't regret it even a little? Hmph… okay, good morning, Subaru-sama. Today is once again a splendid morning you know.

Subaru: I agree, it's a splendid morning. Today too, Petra looks cute, I don't even need to say it.

Petra: Subaru's still saying such things.… Ah, but there are clouds hanging over the sky beyond the forest, it seems that the weather may get worse this afternoon. I have plans to go shopping this afternoon, I hope it'll stay sunnyyyyyy.

He spoke to her with a tone fitting of his age to her's. She wanted people, especially him, to regard her as an adult, despite being a child. And her childish tendencies came loose as she began to puff her cheeks as a sign of pouting.

Subaru: But, rest assured Petra. Today will stay sunny. The clouds give off a false impression and won't be a problem. I can say that for definite.

Petra: Huh? Really? That's super helpful. … But, how do you know?

Subaru: Well, that's because…

She didn't always question his predictions and premonitions, but today was one of those exceptions. She had a reliable sense of weather, and her guesses were usually right, but she looked in confusion at her big brother, who was now putting on a big toothy grin.

Subaru: ――Because I just returned for this, putting my life on the line for it.

Bright as it is infinite, the sky bore down with its sun onto the lonely parasol. Sheltered neath the umbrella was a sole woman with porcelain white skin. She sat by her lonesome, her only company being her cup of warm tea. A gentle breeze carrying the aroma of gardens brushed her equally blanche hair around her shoulders.

She dedicates all her time to observing the world in hopes of learning something new. The boy's peculiar trait made him the perfect opportunity in her eternal dream of quenching her thirst for knowledge.

Echidna: Using one's own life, to save them, to protect them, to keep someone from them, contributing it thus. How virtuous, how noble, surely deserving of everyone's exaltation. Furthermore, not just the once, but challenging an endless cycle of hardships, is the impression it can't help but give.

He was greedy in his pursuit for the "best ending", needlessly drowning in his delusions of clutching the straws of his goals. Pressing onward despite being struck endlessly by reality. Possessing the most wretched power of Return By Death as his own, using its all in order to pay back his love.

Echidna: ――However, dedicating life to Return By Death, to protect one's surroundings, is a double-edged sword. Too disdainful of one's own life, too stubborn about the value of other lives. Because the value of one's own life can no longer be seen, the lives of those precious others become too desperately consequential. This time, anything that isn't the lives of those precious others aside, is unseeable. That is, downright…

No matter when, no matter where, that singular attitude of clinging to what could absolutely not be scoured, was downright foolish.

Echidna: —You truly are, someone who can satisfy me.

Cheeks reddened as if a maiden in the throes of infatuation, the witch longed for the absent boy.

Through the crystal gemstone, he crossed the gate, bringing absolutely everything of the world into her palm. And when the afflictions and hardship shattered him, every time, he unconsciously came to rely on the witch.

She was a master manipulator, and her words keep his spirit afloat, but in doing so, he unknowingly became a marionette. She was the master of puppets, pulling his strings, twisting his mind to meet their dreams. Blinded was he, sometimes he would scream. He would call her name, and she would lead him to his dream.

In order merely to check the weather, adapting a mentality which was unhesitating to use Return By Death, even that had gone unnoticed.

Echidna: But, I want you to rest assured. The lives of those who you prize, I will also wholeheartedly gamble my very wisdom on protecting them. So, for this you too—―

―To satisfy this inexhaustible curiosity of a witch, I want to continue as your accomplice.

Suffering and unreasonable fate, from now forth would equally descend endlessly upon the boy.

Though the hardships stay arduous, the heights insurmountable, the boy with the witch's aid, lending one another's strength and wisdom, found themselves able to cross.

Presented by the Witch of Greed was that love.

Echidna: Ah, even so――

The boy crossed the grand gate, the boy sprinted to offer protection, the boy's guardianship bore fruit; feeling many scarred hearts resulting from the boy's protection, the witch sighed.

A proposition that would remain sempiternally unsolved, and yet an enigma that would eternally enthrall her, even in death.

Ah, even so...

Echidna: ...Why does love, always fade?

The vision came to black. His thoughts floated aimlessly in his mind, endlessly drifting as he wandered in rest. Pondering the conflicting philosophies of Pride, Wrath, Greed, and himself.

There exists many different versions of him, all of which live in somewhere, somehow, in some way. There's the Subaru that lives in Emilia; the Subaru that lives in depravity; the Subaru that lives in Rem; the Subaru that lives in isolation; the Subaru that lives in Garfiel and Otto; the Subaru that lives in solitude; the Subaru that lives in his parents; the Subaru that lives in wallow.

There may be as many versions of Subaru as there are reasons why Satella loves him, but there is only one true Subaru. The Subaru that lives in himself is part of the Subaru the world has compiled. There is a piece of him in everyone and everything he's encountered. Without the smallest encounters, he wouldn't be able to find himself.

He lived every day in this new world from scratch, building all his relations with meticulous detail. He wanted to live a life where he felt truly needed; a life where someone would sincerely call upon him for even the smallest of things. He'd rush to their aid when they call his name and walk beside them on casual strolls.

He always liked when people would truly call for him. It gave him a sense of purpose in the maze of his search for value. He wanted to feel like his actions had meaning; his choices had value. He didn't want to stoop his life and doings to that of a Telltale. He looked for a way to leave an impact on the world around him.

Time and time again, he would watch his dreams shatter.

Time and time again, he would watch his life and death fall apart.

Time and time again, he would watch himself die over and over again.

He's spent time before, during, and after these recent viewings. Time spent wondering what he did wrong, what he should've said, and saw what would've happened if he acted on his indecision.

He did things in his strange way as a means of repentance for those he's let down; for the promises he's broken; for the things he should've done different with his life.

Starting life in another world from zero was the best thing a failure like him would want. A blank slate, a fresh start, a new life. He worked his way to where he was through perseverance and pain. For him, death was never the end. Sometimes he wished it would end, but he would remind himself of why he needs to keep going, no matter how much he suffers.

He finally got a wish of his. People truly loved him; people truly called for him; people truly needed him; he genuinely cared about what his life meant.

In his time in this strange plane of empty, he felt the tug of someone calling him, but now that he's had time to self-reflect, those tugs became pulls. Those pulls became sensations; those sensations became sounds; those sounds became voices; those voices became voices of forgiveness. That forgiveness became yearning, wanting, begging for him to wake up.

The little perception he had in this plane quickly became streaks. It looked like he was moving at the ludicrous speed of hyperspace travel. In there, he saw frames of his memories; his best hits, his worst choices, his accomplishments, his failures. It didn't bother him that he was seeing the trauma all over again, as it was the past, and he had already fret over them for more than long enough.

He could feel his physical body again; his gentle sanpaku eyes, his soft hands, the hidden scars, and the hands of others. He felt something soft and light on his head, something familiar. It was like a pillow, except it was warm in a good way, as if it asked him to stay there.

He tried to move, but felt the pain of sleep paralysis. It felt like his head would pop while his heart would implode, so he did the next best thing and began to breath rapidly and twitch his muscles as much as he could.

He heard concerned voices around him, but didn't have sufficient cognition to put names to faces to voices.

?: Subaru-kun? Subaru-kun? I'll be by your side, like you were mine. Please wake up, I already have, and I'm waiting for you.

?: Please don't die on me, I suppose! You promised that you would be my memorable blink, in fact!

?: Subaru, are you there? You said you wanted to go on a date with me, but that can't happen if you don't get up. You said that I was a pain in the ass, now you are one in mine. You promised you would be by my side, no matter what; that I was your reason to live; you said that you loved me, and thanks to the Warden, I could finally understand. Without you by my side, who else would make a fool of yourself to protect me; who else would want me to love myself for who I am, not what; who else would whole heartedly say "I love you more than anything in this world", even after I did all those things. I love you too, even if you are a little dumb and greedy. I love you too, even if you are a sobbing mess in my lap. I love you too, even if the rest of the world says otherwise. And I know that you love me, so please, wake up.

He instantly identified and felt the crisp air and hum of AC around him. He opened his eyes and saw hazy silhouettes of varying shapes and color. His vision was cloudy, but he felt the concerned and caring gazes of dozen or so people.

His vision adjusted, revealing vibrant color and fine shape of a Half-Elf's face. He was staring straight up at her face as she looked downwards at him with scared amythests.

He knew exactly who he was on. He was resting on Emilia's legs; he was sleeping on a lap pillow of her's.

He looked around to see who else was there and where they were. He was taking up 3 seats; his head in Emilia's lap and part of his torso above her chair; his hands being held by Beako and the other part of his torso above her chair; and his legs in Rem's arms.

They were in a vast, dark, air-conditioned room with a dim light covering an entire wall. Seats with dual cupholders descending and approaching the wall of light; the smell of people and popcorn.

He was resting in an Emilia lap pillow with Beako holding his hands while Rem holds onto his legs to prevent him from falling; all in a dimly lit movie theater auditorium, where magic of all kinds can happen.

Upon closer inspection, he saw that all of his friends, associates, and the other camps were in there. Aside from Emilia, Beatty, and Rem, there were more people in this room.

Ram, Otto, Garfiel, Frederica, Petra, Roswall, Felt, Reinhardt, Crusch, Felix, Wilhelm, Priscilla, Al, Anastasia, Julius, Mimi, Hetaro, and Ricardo.

In his experiences with the eldritch level beings known as The Witches and the pseudo demi-gods called Sin Archbishops, he's noticed that in conjunction with his deductive skills, his "strange abilities" made it somewhat easier to sense those with similar abilities. They each had a distinct pressure, wavelength, aura, or something; because he suddenly felt the presence of Echidna, who was sitting across the row from him; and noticed 3 others.

One was Satella, but he didn't need any power to know when she was near. The next was an unknown, but felt like an authority figure. The last was another unknown, but felt the most powerful of them all. Like it could watch or influence everything they could see, do, and think. But he doesn't have time or energy to worry about what he can't perceive, so he decided to wake up fully.

He reluctantly lifted his head off Emilia's thighs, wishing he could stay on her lap pillow forever. He pulled his arms off Beatrice, wishing that no one else learned about his bad habit. He swung his hips to get his legs off Rem, wondering if it really was her, if she and everyone else had the memories.

His fantasy of gracefully moving his body off the girls did not go according to plan. In reality, he ended cranking his head up and to the right, flailing his shoulders to move his unresponsive arms, and having his hips drag his legs whilst being overpowered by gravity.

He fell about 3 feet (0.92 m) onto the cold sticky carpet. The girls didn't react fast enough to keep him still, so he hit the floor with his right-side like a sack of tatos. His clothes would've been covered with the theater mystery film if he had been wearing his knight uniform, but he was grateful to whoever changed him into his tracksuit.

His favorite jacket still got sticky, but compared to a knight's textile uniform ending up with pulled fibers, it was nothing. His experience caring for his personal effects and family theatergoings back home made him a professional in cleaning the auditorium film off his belongings.

He groaned just a bit, not in pain, but in displeasure. Not even 2 minutes after snapping back to reality, he already made a fool of himself; new speed-run accomplished.

He heard the chuckles of everyone in the room, Echidna's being the most obvious. He, The Loli-Mancer, had just been defeated by a force of nature. The Whale Hunter; crippler of The Witch Cult; slayer of Betelgeuse; doom of The Bowel Hunter; had once again made a fool of himself in front of his friends, the Royal Candidates, and their respective parties.

He coughed a bit from the dust and whatever was on the floor, and slowly got up. He used his arms to push against his knees, and finally stood upright for Satella knows how long.

He looked around a bit, taking in the sea of familiar faces; some welcome, some acquainted, and Echidna. He shot a glare at her in hopes that she won't get out of hand in her thirst for education. He shot a glare at Roswall, knowing damn well about who he really was and what his plans entailed. He would do whatever it took to make sure Ros didn't weasel through his contract, and to prevent Echidna from killing everyone.

Al: Hey, you. You're finally awake.

The enlightened few knew what he referred to, but decided to keep the inside joke an inside joke. Subaru couldn't help but chortle just a bit at Al's piss-poor choice of humor.

Subaru: Seems like all you've been having fun without me. Guess who's back?

Emilia jumped from her seat and hugged Subaru, never wanting to have him hide his pain ever again. She held him as protectively as she could; squeezing him with her unassuming strength and causing his body to make numerous pops.

Emilia, whispering into his ear: Don't you ever leave me like that ever again, got it? I know what you've been through. I'm sorry not noticing sooner.

Beatrice stood next to the lovebirds, expecting that her contractor's love interest would let go of him. But seeing that Emilia wouldn't let go of him, she took it upon herself to "rescue" her contractor.

Beatrice: Only Beatty may hug her contractor like that, in fact! Remove your arms from his frail body at once. (Puts herself onto Subaru's right to hug him) I will not let anyone attempt to violate our contract, I suppose.

Rem scooted herself to the growing pile, overflowing with joy that they could be together again.

Rem, hugging Subaru from his left: Subaru-kun! Your Rem is awake and has been waiting for you. You don't need to hide it any longer.

He took the time to listen to all the girls that piled onto him harem-style. All he needed was a Red Right Hand and a series of fortunate events to replicate the best High School experience ever.

Subaru: Kept you waiting, huh? Don't know why I saw what I did, but it gave me the time to get myself motivated properly. Aside from being asleep for however long I really was, seeing increasingly stranger thing, and not being able to be here with all you, I'm perfectly A-OK.

Warden: Don't leave them to Sorrow like that again boy. It took a whole lot of time and magic to wake you up and show them all what really happened. It felt pretty empty without you.

Subaru: And you are?

Warden: You may call me Warden, but Mr. Screen and Screen-sama are good enough.

Subaru: What kinda warden are you talkin' about? The R6 kind or the Death Row kind.

Warden: Don't compare me to that creep. He keeps getting nerfed every month and his run gets worse.

Subaru: He did always kinda suck. But anyways, why are they here and why was I asleep?

Garfiel: BOSS! YA FIN'LY 'WAKE! MINE 'MAZ'N SELF KEP' ALL 'EM QUIET AN' CALM LIKE WHILE YA W'S SLEEP'N!

Ram: It seems lazy Barasu still needs work on breaking his sloth- …. truly pathetic habits.

Otto: Natsuki, it's good to have you back. As the Minister of Internal Affairs to The Camp of the Royal Candidate Emilia, I can safely say that all these people have been absolutely chaotic.

Roswall: Well dear Kniiiiiiight, it seems that you have amaaaaaaaaased quite the followiiiiiiiiiing.

Warden: Shut up clown, before I send you to The Rabbit Zone.

Frederica: Well Subaru, looks like you've decided to awaken.

Petra: Subaru! Don't leave us alone like that ever again. We saw what happened to you. Cool intros, sound effects and all. I even learned technology while you were asleep.

Subaru quickly lowered his head to look at Petra, reminded of what he saw, but surprised at why she would mention technology.

Felt: Hey, Subaru. You never told us 'bout your home, but now that we got a look at it, I want in.

He looked over at Felt, who was walking towards him, possibly to join the hug. But home? They wouldn't get modern tech, they'd call it all metias.

Reinhardt: Well Subaru, I can only apologize to you from the deepest of my heart. We never fully understood your hardships, but I must say, Reddit is truly and interesting place. I have already amassed a following of 1000 individuals and 999 thousand "Karma" under the alias "ReinSwordSaintAstrea".

Subaru was just about full of confusion as anyone could be. What did Emilia mean by 'she knew'? How could Petra learn about technology? What intros and SFX? How is it that Reinhardt is familiar, much less popular, with Reddit? This was too much to take in.

Echidna: Well, boy. Do you want to take the contract now? All you need to do is follow me back to the Tea Party, take my hand, and you'll make your ending, I swear.

Subaru: Been there, seen it, didn't like it. (under his breath) a contract with you was the worst thing I saw.

Wilhelm: By the Dragon, young man. We never knew what you have sacrificed for all of us. I humbly thank you.

Subaru began to move out of the suffocating wall of women, looked around at all the familiar faces, and smiled that he could be at Emilia's side once again. After freeing himself from a hug that would make a certain Demon-Dragon jealous, he moved around to find a seat.

Everyone followed suit, with the row of chairs filled in a strange order: Ram, Rem, himself with Beako on his lap, Emilia, Petra, Frederica, Garfiel, Otto, Felt, and Echidna in the end in the last seat.

Subaru: So Warden, again, why was I asleep and where exactly are we? There's no way we could be anywhere in Lugunica. There's leather seats with dual cupholders, AC, and the massive screen. This is obviously a movie theater from my home.

Warden: First one, no damn clue. Second, in a pocket dimension theater. I picked ya'll up after you died and Returned By Death.

Satella, still sitting outside of the projection booth watching a Live-Feed on her phone, let off a wave of light anger, almost like she was pouting. The wave of Miasma reached the auditorium, but was immediately neutralized by The Warden.

Warden: Stella... What did I say? Stop being so nosy when someone says Return.

The sound of rustling clothes and a metal door opening, then closing, could be heard.

*Outside the booth*

Warden: If you play nice, I'll let you in there. Stop blasting off smell at them, it's a headache to vent it.

Satella remained immobile, her attention stayed on the dull glow in her hands like olefin on a lollipop.

The Warden steps back into the booth, closing the door behind him.

Warden: Sorry guys, the BTG Witch is having some domestic violence-esque issues. She still hasn't gotten the memo. Oh right, I should let you know something Subaru; the default language here is set to English.

Subaru immediately began to sweat bullets at the sound of Satella, waiting for her to reach for their hearts. Bracing for the literal phantom pain of her punishment, he held his breath, clamped down his eyes, and waited for the bodies to hit the floor. His heart went into overdrive, adrenaline started to flow, he flexed his leg muscles, and puckered many more. He knew what would unfold due to what The Warden had just said, but what was that about default language?

1 second passed...then 2...3...4...5...6.

The blood never streamed from their mouths, and he didn't die. He sat there, clutching his chest, anticipating her anger.

Warden: Subaru, is there anything in particular that you've wanted to say?

Subaru looked up, slowly, peaking through his squinted eyes. He relaxed his muscles, breathed in cycles to relax his heart, and took in a singular breath.

"I CAN RETURN BY DEATH!"

Again, Satella's warning never came. Had she really been tamed, is she really obeying; what for?

The looks everyone had on him softened; some in sadness, some in relief, and some in intrigue.

Emilia: Subaru, what I said a while ago... I meant it. I really do know, and so does everyone else here.

He didn't know what to say. Satella let Return be revealed? Why? How?

Al: Looks like titles are getting longer and more specific with each year. I remember a time when anime titles were simpler, 4 words at max; sometime 6. The title is oddly fitting, a little too fitting. But as it turns out, we live in a wacky multiverse.

Crusch: Subaru, are you leading us to believe that there're other worlds with magic beyond the Wa- I mean... our realms? The Warden had told us that we are merely figments of a sadistic fictional compilation of novels and picture books. We live here in our world; you hail from beyond our Waterfall, from Earth, but if the given information holds to be true, The Waterfall may merely be some sort of veil dividing our planes of existence.

Petra: When we all got transported, Mr. Warden had us watch the story of how you got here. The convenience store, your blinking, your arrival, and... y-y-ou-r de-eaths.

Subaru couldn't believe that Petra was the one who told him that they all knew that death was not his end. He felt warmth all over his face, and when he picked his hands up to wipe away what he thought was blood, he instead wiped away tears from his eyes and cheeks.

Petra: Mr. Warden then showed us something that he called an "anime", and it called Re: Starting Life in Another World from Zero, but it's shortened to Re:Zero.

Subaru: Re:Zero, huh? Looks like I got to live my isekai life and an anime starring me as the MC. I did always kinda figure that I'd be the MC, with my mysterious origins, mannerisms, and skills. I realized there to be a multiverse for this weird-ass world to exist, 'cus if Earth had mana, we'd be living like Irregular at Magic High in 2018 and not have to wait till 2099 or whatever year it happened.

Warden: Sorry to pop your bubbles Caeser, but what she just said is true. We're all characters in an isekai franchise, starring 17-year-old hiki-truant Subaru Natsuki; who one fateful night, after walking out of a convenience store, blinked, and ended up stuck in a world of magic and mutilation that makes Dark Souls look like a Slice of Life like Anohana, Toradora, Clannad, or K-ON. On top of you being an isekai franchise MC, with great success comes great leeches and fanfics.

Subaru felt his heart drop dead like a failed loop. They're all characters in a light novel, manga, and anime series? Th There's no way tha-

Al: That last one's a given. Anything that become popular enough is going to have some pretty eccentric fans. Some of 'em can make some pretty crazy works.

Felt: But why the hell ar-

Reinhardt: Lady Felt, I must ask you to mind your lang-

Otto: What's a Dark Souls?

Beatrice: I do not care if I am a construct in the depraved and perverted mind of a mysterious sadist, I suppose. I care for my contractor all the same.

Felix: I don't wanya have to accept that I'm no-

Garfiel: Shut the hell up you ca-

Echidna: You are certainly one to speak boy. You couldn't pass the Trial you took years back. You saw something sad, and you couldn't accept reality or past events, so you went off and nearly caved in your head.

Ram: Garfiel, why would you have done something so reckless? Asinine choices and deathly decisions are what foolish Barasu is fo-

Frederica: RAM! Don't be like that to Subaru. You saw what he went through and so did the rest of us. He died for our sakes, and we were never the wiser. He threw his life so we might have ours. He remembers it all, and although it may be from the many forgotten pasts, they all reflect on him even now. Just look at his arms and lips.

They remembered that while watching the "anime", The Warden had pointed out his self-harm scars on his arms and lips. Healed over marks from the nightmares and memories of the horrid things he's seen and done.

Emilia, Rem, and Beatrice began to apply healing magic to his arms and lips, ashamed; Beatrice more so for being slothful, noticing and never doing a thing about her contractor's physical and mental state.

Otto: Wait a minute, Beak-

Beatrice: Only my contractor Subaru my call me that. The rest of you must address me as Great Spirit or Beatrice, unless Beatty says otherwise in fact.

Julius: Why is it that he never practiced Spirit Arts? If his Affinity was high, he could've made combat much eas-

Emilia: Spirit Knight Julius Juukulius, my Royal Knight, whom many of you know as The Royal Spirit Knight Subaru Natsuki, The LoliMancer, or The Loli Knight, has a collapsed gate. He lost the ability to cast magic on his lonesome, and he never had the opportunity to train in Spirit Arts. Due to his contract with Beatrice, he is unable to form contracts with other spirits.

Echidna: In my journey of magic and knowledge, I have never come across an individual as eccentric and unique as him. The others seemed to take a liking to him. Her obsession with this individual is irrational, other than the fact that he's from another place I fancy a visit to. It seems like my great failu-

Wilhelm: Silence, Witch of Greed, Echidna. Neither Subaru nor Great Spirit Beatrice are failures for you to conduct your most vile experiments. They have accomplished many great things, together and apart. You, on the other hand, have stilled idly for presumably centuries. With your vast knowledge, immeasurable power, and title, you possessed both means and opportunity to aid the world. Thousands dead at the hands of Ma-Beasts, poverty, and incessant war; you never lifted a finger for the helping of others.

Warden: Hey Edna, that's pretty slothful of you. Maybe Sekhmet has some competition now.

Echidna: The ramblings of a senile and decrepit human mean nothing to me. How do the youth put it? 'It's all talk'? Don't compare me to that poor excuse of a Witch, it's highly plausible that she might not even care or do anything.

Subaru: Leave Wil alone Echidna. I don't see anyone other than Ros willing to take a cont- Hol' up, where'd Ros go?

Everyone began to look for the missing Margrave. He wasn't anywhere in the room at the moment, and there was no way that he'd be able to cast magic to make himself invisible without anyone seeing the mana glow.

Petra: Oshiete, Oshiete, yo sono shikumi wo.

Subaru thought to himself: (Why does that sound so familiar?)

Warden: Oi, clown.

Roswall suddenly appeared in a chair in the bottom row. He was visible confused as to where he was, trying to get up like he had better places to be.

Anastasia: Hey Julius, could you do me a favor and let me get out of this chair? I'm starting to feel reeeeally sore, plus, I'm hung-

A small swivel table made of a strange hard black substance suddenly appeared in front of the greedy purple-haired merchant. On the table was a little box made of a strange, see-through cup with a lid, labeled, 'Eye-bew-pro-fin'?; a small red box with a yellow double arch handle; and a glass cup of a strangely scented red fluid with the label "Kool-Aid" on it.

She opened the small red box, discovering what treasures it held. A strange paper wrapped a small hambulgar with a mysterious yellow layer on the meat and strange beige specks on top; a strangely shaped cup, made of the same material as the can, holding small flaccid tato-scented rectangular-prisms; and a small see-through pouch of appa slices.

She made a confused pouting face, unsure what she was supposed to do with the "Eye-bew-pro-fin" box. She picked it up the "Eye-bew-pro-fin" cup, and turned it around, felling that there was a lot of something in there; whatever was in there made a strange noise on collision, akin to pebbles in a wooden barrel.

Warden: Do you guys not have pain-killer meds? How do you all even work with just magic?

Felix: As Blue, I can safely say that even basic water myages can do better than some silly ol' pill that you might give us. Even if it myight come from anyather world with "technyalogy", myagic is superior to some dumb pill.

Warden: Anastainsia, don't you pride yourself on your intuition and perception? What's the point in your career if you can't even figure out what to do with a box of food and some pills?

Ricardo: Lil' Miss, that food and drink smell safe.

Al: She don't look too happy with her meal.

A tray with a box and cup similar to the confused merchant's appeared in front of Al, but the fluid in the cup was a different color; somewhere between brown and black, made a strange faint fizzing sound similar to cooking meat, and small bubbles rushed to the top.. With his good (and only) arm, he opened up the red box, undid the wrap, grabbed the hambulgar, lifted his helmet, and took a bite out of it.

Everyone just watched as the helmeted knight acted with such familiarity and experience; watching him finish the small hambulgar and the flacid tato strips within a few minutes. A white handkerchief appeared in his hand as soon as he finished the last tato piece; patting down is mouth and chin for any residue it potentially left. He then picked up the cup, presumably familiar with the unidentifiable fluid in there.

He lifted the cup up to his still exposed mouth, and took a big sip of the mysterious black fizzy water. He set the cup down and let out a long sigh of enjoyment.

Al: Man, no drink in this crazy place can beat a good ol' Diet Coke. Those Americans sure knew what they were doing with the little box and soda.

Warden: Hey Al, if you ever return to Earth, why don't you go on to be a stand-up comedian? You got the knack and balls to crack jokes at White Yog here, so where's the harm in doing it on Earth? No other country like the USA; Guns, War, and sometime Coke.

Subaru lifted his finger in protest, then realized that the comparison did work, but could've been better; she was more like if He-Mor was more of an ass.

'Coke? Americans? Guns?', most visibly thought. The unfamiliar turned to Echidna, pleading that the near omniscient white-haired Witch of Greed would know what in the Dragon was happening.

As it turns out, Echidna too had a tray, box, and cup identical to Al's. She inspected the strange hambulgar wrap, reading over its legible colored words, the language presumably in this "English" The Warden had said.

After a time of fiddling with the wrap like a delicate jewel, she picked up the hambulgar and took a small bite out of it, crumbs falling all over her mouth and dress; brown specks of flaky bread dotted her contrasting garment.

Echidna: It has a strange but savory taste. The bread is soft, flaky, and flavorful; the meat is somewhat thin but rich and juicy; plus, the strange vinegee taste of the yellow sauce compliments the hambulgar and the somewhat sweet taste of the red tomato sauce.

She picks up the cup of "Coke", took a test sip, and began sputtering the "soda" into a handkerchief. Her unrefined tounge felt like it was being jabbed in millions of places, but the strange burning tingle sensation spread in her mouth.

Al: Carbonation, corn syrup, and a bunch of other things. Things that don't exist in this world. The carbonation is what gives it the tingle sensation, so you'll probably feel a little burning feel. It might be a bit off-putting, but it's harmless.

Anastasia tried to remember the ingredients, and began to construct sentences in an attempt to convince the extreme foreigners to lend her the drink's recipe.

Warden: Take the Ibuprofen dammnit. Stop trying to steal Earth's ideas.

The food in front of Anastasia disappeared, leaving only the "Eye-bew-pro-fin" box and the "Kool-Aid" cup on the tray. In the midst of her scheming, the soreness of being stuck in the "booster seat" intensified.

She grabbed the "Eye-bew-pro-fin" can with her left hand, reading the text inscribed in hopes of finding application instructions. She read that each pill is "200mg", and that the maximum dose of a 23-year-old maiden like her should take is "1200mg"; 6 pills.

She wasn't in extreme pain, like an arrow in her thigh; but she wasn't comfortable with the pain, so she grabbed the lid and tried to pry it off.

Warden: It's a child-lock screw-off cap to prevent kids like you from getting them. To take the cap off, you gotta press it down while screwing it off.

She complied with the removal procedure; applying force downwards and twisting the cap off, revealing a paper sheet half covered with a loosely attached film.

Warden: Now pull it back.

She used her right index and thumb to grip the plastic sheet, and the paper seal came off. She shook the can till 2 pills came out and landed on her hand. She put them in her mouth, and nearly gagged from the taste.

Warden: And that's why I gave you some cherry Kool-Aid.

She put down the pill bottle and picked up the cup. She took a sip; the highly concentrated sweet flavor of fruit making her eyes go wide; and she eventually swallowed the pills with the aid of the Kool-Aid.

Subaru: Mr. Warden, is there any chance that I can get food?

Petra: FREEZE, Kowaseru kowasenai kurueru kuruenai, Anata wo mitsukete Yureta, Yuganda sekai ni dandan boku wa, Sukitoote mienaku natte, Mitsukenaide boku no koto wo mitsumenaide

Subaru: Petra? How do you know that song?

Petra: I'm on my phone watching an anime called "Tokyo Ghoul". These ghouls remind me of that lady. What was her name... Elsa?

Beatrice: Why do I get the feeling that the young girl shouldn't be watching that I suppose.

Subaru made a smiling surprised face while looking at Petra, wondering if an impressionable growing girl like her should be watching one of the goriest anime. But then again, if they were being serious, they did watch his post isekai-life, and that wasn't exactly the most child-friendly series of events. She also wasn't part of the wimpy and oversensitive generation of his home, Earth, so she might be used to seeing blood and death.

Subaru: You gave them phones?! Why didn't you tell me?!

Warden: Psychic materialization is the game here. There's a hall in the back right with all the rooms. Space'll change with your thoughts and commands, so you can have as much or little space; any bed or blanket; consoles, PC, games, phone, etc.

Subaru put both sets of index and middle fingers against his temples, squinting his eyes hard. A swivel chair tray with a wide assortment of food appeared in front of him.

Subaru: YEEEEESSSSSS! Miso, Onigiri, Tempura, Matcha Ice Cream, an orange Ramune, and some Mayo on the side. Emilia, Rem, Beako, wanna dig in?

Emilia: What is this strange food? I've never seen anything like this in Lugunica before. What is that glass container?

Rem: Subaru-kun, is this food from your homeland? It's so strange to see soup and meat like that, but I do recognize the mayonnaise on the side.

Ram: Rem, do not taint yourself with Barasu's strange foods. What if he takes advantage of you or poisons the food? If he so much as averts a perverted gaze at you, I will not hesitate to gouge his eyes and relieve him of his manhood.

Felt: Ram! Why would ya' think Subaru would poison Rem, much less try and take advantage of her? He's not the best fighter, but he's one of the best damn talkers I've seen in m' life. We all saw so in tha- Before...

Garfiel: OI! Ram, don' talk shit 'bout Boss! H's a badass on h's own. Don' ge' b'tween Boss and the Boss Ladies.

Petra: YEAH. Tell her Gar!

Otto: Go Garfiel. Nothing will stop Natsuki from expressing his love to Misses Emilia and Rem.

Subaru: Awwww, stop it you guys. You're embarresing me in front of the ladies. How else am I supposed to show off my manliness and loyalty if I can't defend my honor or myself?

Beatrice was tired of getting caught in the crossfire, but decided to stay silent. It was up to contractor to save his already diminishing reputation.

Emilia covered her mouth with the tips of her slim fingers, failing to hide her small laugh and blushing. Rem did the same, but chuckled a bit louder. Everyone stared at them as Subaru tried to gesture sharing food.

Subaru: You guys want some? I can guarantee that you've never had any like it. Come on Beako, I bet you'll like it.

Emilia shifted her focus and hips onto her dimwit of a knight, making an indecisive face, then pointed to one of the 3 triangular masses of thin white pellets with a thin greenish black bottom.

Subaru: Oooo. Onigiri, or riceballs; one of my favorite sides. It's a filled ball of rice with a piece of nori, or seaweed, on the bottom. It can be filled with anything you can stuff in any food. I like to top it with... (summons a small cup of pinkish brown flakes) bonito fish flakes.

He picked up the little dish and sprinkled some onto the warm chunk of rice, watching the fish shavings meld onto the ball. He broke a piece and handed it too the little blonde on his lap.

Beatrice: It's good I suppose. I'd much rather have something sweet, but anything my contractor offers me to eat will more than likely be eaten in fact.

Subaru: Awww, you're so cute when you try to not admit that you like it Beako. I bet that you're secretly holding the urge to ask for more. If you want, you can take a seat somewhere close and think up whatever you want to eat or drink.

Beatrice: I am the noble Great Spirit Beatrice, contracted to The Royal Knight of Emilia, Subaru Natsuki. I do not require sustenance to function, but I would like to sample the cold green substance, in fact.

Emilia opened her mouth and leaned forward; he put the other half of the onigiri in her mouth, and took a bite.

Emilia: It's a bit (chews a bit more) … sticky. It's so warm and it melts in my mouth, and the fish adds flavor to the rice. It's so- ukkkk...hak...akkk-

Ram: BARASU! What did you do to Miss Emilia?!

Subaru: I did nothing! I'm guessing she hasn't had anything much to eat or drink. Here...

He grabbed the glass bottle: tearing the plastic seal; simultaneously removed a strange plastic piece from the inside of the lid; and pressed the inner piece into the top of the bottle, letting a small glass ball clink against the inside.

Subaru: Emilia, drink this.

He handed the pale half-elf the glass bottle, taking it from his hands, and drank a quarter of it in one go.

Emilia: Ahhhh. Thank you Subaru. This, what was it? "Soda"? Is really good. It has a fruity taste but leaves a strange fizzy sensation.

Subaru: That drink is a national favorite of my homeland. 'The Drink of Japan', Ramune soda. This one is in orange flavor, but there's also more flavors such as lemo-

Emilia's eyes shine in delight like the jewels they were. She held her hand out, holding the mold Subaru's bottle left in her palm. A lemon Ramune bottle instantly appeared in her hand, perfectly held in place with her grip.

She looked at the plastic seal, picking at it with her nails, and eventually tore it off. She looked at the strange top, squeezing the plastic cap, and lifted it.

Emilia: Subaru, how do you open this Ra-mu-ne?

Subaru: The lid separates. You need to push the opener out the cap.

He looked at his tray, and another orange Ramune appeared. He grabbed it, tore the seal, lifted the cap, and showed Emilia how to remove the cap from the opener.

Emilia copied her dunderhead knight and held the separated plastic. She inspected the opener, and put it in the bottle rim, punching the glass marble out; letting her savor the lemon-lime drink for the first time ever.

Emilia: Mmmmm. Its SO good. Subaru, why didn't you try and make this in the mansion? You made your mayo before, so why not try to make this? Maybe you should try to make this.

Warden: Anastain, NO.

Rem let out a long sigh of enjoyment as the sound of glass on plastic came from her direction.

Rem: Subaru-kun, what's your favorite taste of this Ramune drink? I've tried every kind, and my favorite is the "blueberry" one.

Subaru: First of all, Rem, flavor. Second, orange. Third, every? Fourth, come on, let's eat before the food gets cold. Beako, do you want one? You seem like someone who would like peach.

He held his arm out and a peach Ramune appeared in his hand. He commenced with the opening ritual, and handed the freshly opened glass bottle of pink-ish drink to the little girl on his lap. By all appearances, if you didn't know their true ages, it would look like a father handing his daughter a drink. She grabbed the cold Ramune bottle, feeling the condensation fall onto her fingers, and used both hands to lift the unfamiliar drink to her lips.

Beatrice: It's delicious, I suppose. Sweet, fruity, and refreshing in fact.

Subaru: I told you, Beako. And before I forget...

He grabbed a piece of fried breaded fish from the plate of tempura and broke it into thirds. He set the third piece down on the plat and held a section in each hand to let Emilia and Rem taste a new food. The girls on his opposite sides took the hint and ate their respective piece.

Emilia & Rem: Mmmm... Fish.

Subaru: I'm so sorry Rem. I was so caught up with helping Emilia from choking that I never handed you some onigiri to try.

He grabbed the a still warm untouched onigiri and handed it to Rem, who bit into the rice ball.

Rem: It's good Subaru-kun. Nee-sama, would you please taste it?

Ram looked to her sides and saw all the pressuring stares of everyone; their gazes pushing her to comply with Rem's request.

Ram: Sister, may I please try the strange food? I highly doubt it will meet my standards considering it is related to Barasu.

Rem handed the clump of rice to Ram, who took it, and bit into it; her monotonous expression changing to delight as she closed her eyes, smiled, and held the treat with both hands.

Subaru: Looks like the heartless maid has a thing for treats. And before I forget...

Subaru summoned a spoon and began to share his matcha ice cream between Emilia, Rem, Beatrice, and himself.

Emilia&Rem: It's so sweet Subaru/Subaru-kun! It tastes familiar, but what is it?

Beatice: These strange frozen balls of milk have the taste of tea. Dear contractor, precisely what is it that you have given us.

Subaru: Looks like my dear Beako likes matcha, or green tea, an iconic drink of my homeland of Japan. And the frozen milk balls with tea flavoring is a substance called ice cream. Its frozen milk mixed in with air; mixed so it doesn't turn into a thick block of ice milk. The mixed in air is what lets you scoop it and get some with a spoon. One moment please.

He set the spoon down and held his hand out, palm up. His flip-phone appeared in his hand a moment later; he rejoiced as he reunited with his phone, originally losing it for compensation in the Hunt for The White Whale.

Subaru: 100%, full bars, all my contacts; looks like I have my phone back. And since it seems like everyone else has smartphone...

He pocketed his flip-phone in the left pocket of his iconic tracksuit and once again held his hand out, palm up.

A smartphone appeared in his hand, the sleek thin black box strangely fitting in his hand; sitting in his palm naturally, as if it had belonged there since time began.

Subaru: Nice. Now I have a Note 7 Pro. Let me just go to the store aaaand... got it! Looks like it hasn't had that many updates... Just some water and bug patches, mobs added... and some structures added. Aaaand one last thing...

He began to furiously let his thumbs fly against the glowing glass, clearly having experience using apparatus similar to it.

Subaru: YESSS. Still got my Reddit account. "Pleiades_Schwarz", 2 million Karma, 1500 followers. What's this? Trending, anime... Re:Zero?!

Warden: Looks like Reddit is running off some universe. Multi-verse bullshit and quantum mechanics fuckery is never fun to mess with. (Voice sounding distant) Oi, Stella, you can go in now.

Subaru: Star? (Muttering to himself, as if insane and lost in thought) Stella, Stella, Stella, Stella, Stella, Stella Stella Stella Stella Stella StellaStellaSteeeeeeellll...

He realized who The Warden was permitting passage to.

The room became overwhelmed with an aura that made everyone nauseous and horrified, evident as to whom had just entered the theater.

There was no telling what she would do, but considering the local god had to let her in, they parted with a bit of fear.

A dark presence had entered from the rear left of the auditorium. A singular woman in a dark robe began to walk to Subaru. She kept her head pointed downward as she crept towards the boy; a dark wispy grey vapor clung and swirled around her silhouette; she wore a dress and veil identical to Emilia's, but she wore black, fitting of a mysterious being such as her.

The Jealous Witch, The Witch of Envy; Satella.

Satella: Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru Ashiteru

Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru

Stay, Stay, Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me Stay with me

No one moved a single hair as Satella strafed towards the object of her obsession.

Echidna: You both disgust me, Witch.

As she passed Petra, who tucked her legs into her chair, she lifted the shadowy veil from her head, revealing her face to the audience. Beatrice began to draw mana, knowing full well that she could never beat Satella, but Subaru told her to sit on another chair so she could stay safe.

If you put them side by side, it would be near impossible to differentiate the two of them. Short, rounded, pointed elven ears authenticating half-elvish makeup; long silver hair that barely reflected light; and bright purple eyes, indescribably beautiful as if they were gemstones.

Everyone stayed as humanly still as possible as Satella stood in front of Subaru and leaned forward to hug him. He just sat still as The Witch hugged him, holding onto him, and he knee that she wouldn't let go unless something had interrupted her.

Subaru: Why? I don't know why. WHY ARE YOU SO OBSCESSED WITH ME?!

Satella: You gave me light when I sat in the darkness; you showed me the outside world when it shut me out; you held my hand as when there was no one around; you would kiss me when no one would love me.

No one could accept that Subaru would love the most vile of beings; the one who caused the Great Calamity that took place 400 years ago, destroying half the world, and sparking multiple wars and massacres of demi-humans, particularly elves, especially half-elves.

Subaru: When?! Why?! I'm an 18-year-old boy who stopped going to school; spending each day watching anime and playing video games; I waited for the hours to tick away so I would have reason to not go; I never did anything of value in my life.

Satella: I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you.

Warden: (clears throat) TOKI WA UGOKIDASU

Subaru didn't realize that Satella had frozen time, as his only experience with stopped time was when she would send her hands to silence him. It was unusual for Satella to stop time for something like this, but he guessed that anytime she had with him called for her to pull out all the stops.

Subaru: AAAnd I'm back.

Warden: Satella, take a seat and behave yourself or get out of there. You can use your phone, get some food, or get a room; but if you start acting up, I'll remove your ass faster than Sasha finding food.

Satella didn't take her gaze off Subaru, standing in front of him, menacingly, as if waiting for something to appear. Everyone stared at the young boy, understanding what little relationship between The Witch and him. They saw him wildly scream about returning, as if waking from a hallucinogenic experience.

Everyone wondered what Satella would do next. Would she stay standing in front of Subaru? Would she reach for a hug? Would she take him to her Palace of Darkness? What will she do?

Warden: Sure, sure, stay standing, don't take one of the dozens of empty seats.

A row of screams came from Subaru's row. When the people below looked up, they had switched seats. Either Satella stopped time and used her hands or The Warden had used his strange magic to change their postiions.

The new, altered seating: Frederica, Petra, Ram, Rem, Satella, Subaru, Emilia, Beatrice, Otto, Garfiel, and Echidna all the way at the end.

Subaru wasn't sure if he should be fearing for his existence or be happy beyond comparison. In the 'Memory Snow' 'anime special', he tried to lull himself to sleep by counting Emilias; "1 smiling Mili, 2 smiling Milis, 3 smiling Milis. Ooooo, IS THIS HEAVEN?!"

Now, he's not sure if this is Heaven, Hell, something worse, something better, or something in the middle. Sure, he might be sitting directly between 2 of the most beautiful women in his lives; one an angel that came from the heavens and the other a bi-polar eldritch level god-like entity with MPD.

Satella reached over the cupholders and held onto his arm, tugging on it and using it as a pillow. Emilia grabbed her airheaded knight's free hand and held onto it, not wanting to let go of him, not wanting him to go back to his painful existence.

Suabru: Ladies, laides. There's not enough me to go around. Satella, could you please let me move my arm so I can finish eating?

Satella stayed tight against his arm and by whatever miracle, a curse most likely, the food began to move to their mouths. Bits of breaded fish and rice balls floated and moved mid-air; slowly drifting to their mouths so they might eat.

Subaru saw Satella bring them out, and felt the adrenaline start to flow. He thought that she would pop his heart or break his legs so she could indulge in her strange delights, whatever those may be.

He saw the nigh-eternal noir hands of purple silhouettes drift to his stomach or legs, but then delicately grab 2 pieces of tempura, dipping one in the dish of mayo on the side. The mayo tipped one went for his mouth, and the other retracted to its source. He bit into his, removing the mayo edged fish from this state of being; the other went to Satella's mouth, and she took a moderately sized bite.

They chewed their food in piece as everyone turned with awkward angles in their chairs, unsure of what in the ever-loving OD was unfolding between their eyes. Then it hit them like a special ender of lives that proceeded to back up and hit again; that Satella was using her Shadow Hands to feed them so she could hold onto him instead of punish him. It was most certainly a curious sight to behold.

They all watched as the black-haired, nasty-eyed boy was being caressed by 2 half-elves possessing silver hair and vibrant violet eyes. A clear glass bottle of "Ramune" appeared in mid-air, its liquid content a dark purple liquid. The seal on the top of the glass bottle was removed, the lid lifted and seperated, and the faint klink of colliding glass.

The bottle floated towards the clinging woman's head. And when it arrived, she lifted her head just enough to permit the bottle to tip the purple liquid into her mouth.

Satella: Fruit. So sweet. Delicious. Not as sweet as you, my love. I love you

Oddly enough, with his encounters with her, Subaru didn't feel threatened by her speaking. It was like she was a mother caring for him like a hurt child. The comparison was on-point, but sparked some strange implications.

Satella: Hmhm. You're funny.

Subaru felt his hair stick up stiffened as she spoke. Did she read his mi-

Satella: Mind? Maybe. You're always at the front of my thoughts. The one everyone calls my "Daughter" and the forgotten Oni is always at the front of your's. Please make some room for me in your's please?

Subaru was trying to think with 2 trains simultaneously. One to make some overpowering white noise and the other to maek a plan that didn't end with him and all the others dead.

A sound emanated in the room.

A voice.

A soft voice.

A concerned voice.

A sweet voice.

A voice so sweet everyone thought it was the angles' beat.

?: Let go of him, Satella.

Who, what, and where ever that voice came from clearly had authority and power above Satella's, as she released Subaru and sat still in her leather chair. A black plastic swivel tray appeared in front of her with a white plate. A rich brown piece of warm bread with a strange, sweet smelling brown sauce topped it and the white ice cream on top. Off to the side was a small folded triangular piece of paper that read in plain English, 'Brownie and Vanilla Ice Cream'.

She lifted her physical right hand and summoned a metal spoon. She held the spoon and began to scoop bits of the brownie with ice cream to eat. No one was sure of what it was that saved Subaru from the clutches of The Witch, as silence pondered in the room. The quiet was broken by a voice of delight, a woman's voice, one that held intellect and collectiveness.

Echidna: This color of tea is certainly most curious. Compared to my own, it definitely has some flavor. What was it, green tea, matcha?

Warden: Echidna, you can go to the hall in the back right and have your own room. People are getting weirded out by your drink-gasming.

Echidna: Private quarters, for me? Don't mind me, I'll be on my way with my phone and charger.

She got up out of her seat and began to walk down the row to reach the stairs.

When she passed Frederica, the maid, Petra, Ram, and Rem all gave her glares of warning and worry.

Echidna, thinking: (The blue-haired one is obsessed with the boy, the red one acts sour to him, the small child sees him as a big brother, and the demi-cat sees him as a protector.)

When she passed Beatrice, she wondered what other "routes", as the boy put it, her daughter could've taken to meet her they. The contract was complete, as she did eventually accept Subaru as her "they", but disappointed that it took 400 years for her to decide who she wanted to be saved by.

When she reached Petra, she paused, causing the small maid to tense and raise her shoulders and hold onto Frederica. She looked at Emilia and Satella, making her signature face.

Echidna: Look at this, Mother and Daughter. Like Mother, like Child, you both disgust me as much as Hector, maybe more. Remove your presence from mine and die the both of you. Pitifu-

Subaru: Echidna, be nice. Don't be such a prick to these lovely women just because you happen to be a Witch. Satella is, well, Satella. And I remember Emilia saying that she was the self-proclaimed Witch of Glaciation. As it turns out, she occasionally sleep freezes. I just so happened to be lucky enough when sh-

Echidna increased her pace, clearly not wanting to spend any more time near them. She got a glare of distrust from Garfiel, and Otto was conflicted as to whether he should fear the woman in front of him or to "size her up" as Natsuki put it.

She continued walking to have a room that could has the potential to temporarily satiate her never-ending greed for knowledge. She parted with the sea of chairs, headed down the small flight of stairs, and made a U-turn to proceed down the "Infinity Hall", dubbed so due to it warping to each of their wants and demands, meeting the criteria of whatever they wish for it to do.

She chose the 1st door on the right; a standard light tan wooden door held by metal hinges. The strange feature was that it had a metal lever for a handle, and when she pushed it down, something within the wood moved. She pushed the door open, and was met with a library that could possibly be larger than The Great Library she entrusted to her "daughter".

Endless rows and shelves of large leather-bound books as far as her eyes could see. No one to bother her; nothing but the promise of knowledge, silence, and the occasional snack. Exactly as she wanted to spend her time.

Echidna: This will most certainly be interesting.

She closed the door, secluding herself to her lonesome once more. The moment the small metal latch-bolt clicked into its groove in the door-frame, a metalic silver nameplate was bolted onto on the wooden body of the door's exterior, it read "Echidna" in large black letters that easily indicated the owner and had perfectly contrasting colors.

Subaru: (muttering in thought) Wait, if Echidna can go to that hall and potentially end up in a potentially infinite library... then can I have my own room with as many games and things as I want?

He got up as he excused himself, claiming that he wanted to investigate something. Even if Crusch's Divine Blessing of Wind Reading didn't detect his statement, Rem, Emilia, and some of the others will catch on pretty quick, but that was to be expected.

He walked down the row, looking back to see potential followers, and saw that Satella was about 1.5 meters behind him (a little less than 5 ft). And behind her was a tailing party of Rem, Emilia, Beatrice, Petra, Frederica, Garfiel, and Otto.

He saddened a little bit internally, that because he had a 1- or 2-person room back home that might accommodate 8 people, including himself. He reached the hall with the sneaking failures behind him, all bunched up at the bottom of the inclining walkway.

He continued down the hall, picking the 3rd door on the left as his own; because Emilia should have the 1st and Rem should have the 2nd, but Rem'll probably share her room with Ram. He walked into his choosen room, having a clear mental picture of what he wanted.

He turned the door-knob and was met with a heart-warming nostalgic sight; his room from back on Earth. To the immediate left was his desk with organizational drawers and rolling chair; on top was his running PC, consoles, and games, still organized from his poorly spent time from Earth; perpendicular to his standing was his manga and light novel collection, sorted in the shelf as he left it; against the opposite wall and the left wall was his clothes strewn over his still messy bed, bunched up blankets, and thrown pillows from when he got up and went to the store that night; and embarrassingly enough, the trash around the room with figurines and posters of various women with silver and white hair wearing various levels of clothing.

First order of business, he thought the posters and trash out of local existence, prying that they'll never reach the eyes of the line behind him. He made his bed and thought for the laundry to be cleaned and organized.

He pulled the sheets of his bed and blankets back to their corners and put the pillows parallel to the wall. He ran his hands across the sheets to find any remnant trash and to flatten any stray wrinkles.

He heard the approaching sound of wood-heeled leather boots colliding with the marble tile of the halls. He rushed to close his door in a feeble attempt to buy himself some time, knowing full well that almost everyone in the stack had more than enough strength and experience to break down wooden doors. It wouldn't take them very long to find the door with his name on it.

Judging by the sound, factoring the sound dampening properties of his room; the average stride of a 152+ cm person (5 ft and above); the distance from the ramp to his door, 7.3m (~24ft); and courtesy waiting; he had about 30 seconds to finish up cleaning his room.

He picked up the few game cases underneath his desk, putting them in a random drawer; he turned to his chair and sat down, furiously typing away on his thought-created English keyboard, inputting commands to open his history. He sat in silence, quietly contemplating and thinking back to what he mentioned during a snow day at the mansion as he saw what awaited him in the extensive list of physical and animated things he'd rather not have everyone see.

God knows what Satella, Emilia, Rem, and Ram would think of him if they saw the less than savory things on his computer. Good thing he had adblock and the ability to clear.

With a few more keystrokes, the history was as gone as a fiery Egyptian; never to be seen in the light of the world again.

He felt the oncoming of sweat form on his forehead and hairline, so he wiped his head and let out a sigh of relief out of instinct. It felt good to finally clean his room up after years of not going to school.

Subaru: Wonder how mom and dad are doing? Wonder what happens back home during an isekai? Does time freeze back home, or does time go on without you?

He laid his head back into his chair; reclining back just enough to relax. He rested his eyes for a moment, thinking back to the series of things that led up to his predicament in this strange world, and thinking of what could've happened back on Earth.

His sudden appearance; the Alley Trio; meeting Emilia; helping her find Felt and the insignia; dying; the mansion; Rem, Ram, Beako, the bastard Ros; dying again; the village; the capitol; his beatdown; his confession of self-loathing to Rem; dying some more; killing The Whale and Betelgeuse; Rem's erasing; The Sanctuary, the villagers, Garfiel, and the Ryuzus; dying again; entering The Graveyard and The Witch's Tea Party, meeting Echidna, confiding in her about Return By Death, and even drinking her tea; The Rabbit Death; The 2nd Tea Party, meeting the other Witches + Satella, and refusing Echidna's contract; leaving The Sanctuary, then dying in the mansion; stopping the Mansion attackers, Elsa and Meili; saving Beatrice, forming a contract with her, and killing The Great Rabbit; liberating The Sanctuary, freeing its trapped inhabitants; officially becoming Emilia's Royal Knight, and his most recent blunder, going to The WaterGate City of Priestella for a meeting, and dying repeatedly while fighting off the invading Witch Cultists and Sin Archbishops.

His life was certainly hell. He really did know suffering. This was one crazy world with no server balance, looking more and more like Dark Souls with every loop.

His deep thinking had him lost temporarily, but his trance was broken with the sound of a knock. He flinched in surprise, thinking about how he would explain all the creations of science from Earth to the people that lived in a world of magic and monsters. He turned his chair to face the door way, waiting for them to enter.

It would most certainly be a hassle to explain to Emilia when she realizes what he meant by "adult websites" back at the mansion; play with Beako and show her the wonders of 21st century tech; explain how Earth money and cryptocurrency works to Otto; show Garfiel how he worked-out at home and potentially introduce him to Monster Hunter; maybe re-confess to Rem how he told her that he was worthless, assuming that they all didn't see it in his own anime... what a weird thing to think; show Ram his various cooking and peeling skills with familiar ingredients; tell Petra what shows she is allowed to watch at her age, God forbid she finds DxD; sit down with Satella in hopes of explaining that he has no idea why she's obsessed with him; introduce Crusch to strategy and management games; chat with Al if they come from the same or different universes; keep Pricilla away from any and all otome games; show Julius what guards and knights are like in the modern world; keep Anastasia out; show what Earth animals are like to Ricardo and the Cat Twins; explain power-scaling to Reinhardt and why he's the most broken character ever and how his arsenal is every isekais' wet dream; and show Felt technology and Earth weapons, so she doesn't have to rely on her small knife and Reinhardt all the time.

The Tailing Party: We're going inside, please don't mind us Subaru.

The door opened, permitting the small flood of people into his strange modern room. Emilia, Satella, Beatrice, Rem, Ram, Otto, Garfiel, Petra, and Frederica.

Satella immediately sat on his bed and looked at him; Emilia stood in the corner next to the bookshelf, observing the oddities of Subaru's room; Beatrice walked over to him and sat on his lap, probably waiting for his hug or one of his famous headpats; Rem uncomfortably sat next to Satella on the bed; Ram stood at the foot of the bed, wondering why her dearest sister would sit next to The Witch and stare at foolish Barasu; Otto picked up a strange book behind the door, the front reading 'Toradora', and began reading; Garfiel couldn't contain his excitement, grinning and shaking his hands like a child begging for an award; Petra sat on the floor next to Emilia, watching "Naruto" because Subaru said she shouldn't watch Tokyo Ghoul; and Frederica stood next to Emilia to watch over the little maid.

Subaru: Sooooo anyways... this is my room from Earth. I know, I know, it isn't the most luxurious, like one of the mansion's guest rooms, but it does have a bunch of things you all've never seen before, liiike...

He swiveled his chair slowly to face his computer because Beatrice was on her favorite spot. He carefully reached his left arm around her and pulled the QWERTY keyboard closer. He began to type quickly, english characters appearing in the bar on top.

'A-n-(space)-o-v-e-r-v-i-e-w-(space)-o-f-(space)-h-u-m-a-n-(space)-h-i-s-t-o-r-y'

He clicked a button on the side of his strange slab of plastic, and the white screen changed to a list of black and blue text. He clicked on the 1st box, changing the screen to a different frame. On the top of the new frame read 'History Central' in large letters, and the center text read, '5500BC-0BC, 0BC-1400AD, 1400-1900AD, The 20th Century'.

Subaru: If you all can please take out your phones, please click on the big multicolored 'G' symbol, and type in, 'An overview of human history'. Oh, before I forget, on Earth, we don't have anything like Demi-Humans, your version of Oni and Spirits, Elves, mana, magic, Divine Blessings, Authorities, or crazy hair colors; just black, brown, blonde, red, and sometimes white or grey. And please, be careful with the stuff in here, it all costs about 900000 yen (8.3k USD).

Emilia: Subaru, what exactly is that contraption? I don't sense any mana being used in any of the stuff here, could it be that "electricity" thing that Mr. Warden had mentioned?

Beatrice: Contractor, what is this thing in front of us? Is this that "Desktop Computer" that you mentioned that you had?

Otto: Hey, Natsuki? Do you have any other books like this one? The story is so intriguing, yet there doesn't seem to be any mention of mana or its usage.

Garfiel: 'Ey Boss, how'd ya' man'ge tu' stay a' fit a' yu' are?

Petra: Hey Subaru, why is everyone in this show so mean to this boy in the orange tracksuit?

Ram: Barasu, explain what you have conjured at once. I will not hesitate to destroy these items if they pose a threat to Emilia, Master Roswall, or my dear sister.

Rem: Subaru-kun, the way that you use that thing is amazing. Do you think you could teach me how to use it?

Satella: (quietly) I'm in his room. (small laugh)

Subaru: Emilia, in my world, we don't have mana, we've made everything with our own hands and used the power of machines to make life easier; I'll explain later. My dear Beako, yes this is the PC I talked about before. Otto, there's more manga, light novels, and other books right there (points to the shelf). Garfiel, I used to work out with my dad, till I got transported here. Petra, are you watching Naruto?, because you'll find out in later episodes. Ram, don't be so mean, try and think about the ways that my world can help improve your cooking. Rem, its not that hard to use this keyboard, I bet even Ram could do it, so it should be pretty easy to learn how to use it. Wait till you see my skills with a peeler.

Ram: Barasu, repeat the last few sentences. I may have to relieve you of your manhood and eyes of you continue to diminish my abilities as a maid of Lord Roswall. Maybe then, you'll become a more competent butler that could be worth of Ms. Emilia. And what is this peeler that you mention?

Emilia: Subaru, your world is interesting. Maybe someday we could all visit "Japan" and meet your family.

Subaru: Earth sure is pretty cool. But yeah, maybe sometime we could go on a date in Japan. See all the sights in Hokkaido, see the cherry blossoms, share a meal...

Emilia: Oh, you dunderhead, saying all those silly things. But it would seem fun.

Subaru: D'oh, another shot through the heart by Mili. Don't be so mean like that. Think about the impression others might have if they find out that you bully your one and only Royal Knight.

Emilia: (small laugh) You're such a child when you try to be mad.

Subaru: Does this mean that you accept?

Emilia: Maybe, but only if you promise not to embarrass yourself in particular.

Subaru: Yes Ma'am.