Author's Note: Sorry for the delay. I've had nothing but technical issues uploading chapters since late last week. Many thanks to those on facebook for assistance and suggestions.

Chpt. 3 TPOV:

It's been three fucking days and I can't get her out of my head. I hate myself for not feeling her getting out of bed that morning. How is it possible that I haven't slept more than a couple of hours in months but when there's a beautiful woman sleeping next to me I suddenly sleep soundly for over four hours? How did I not feel her get out of bed, get changed, write a note and slip out of our room? My training prevented me from sleeping soundly for the last four years so how the fuck did we miss Ana slipping from our room?

Ana.

We've tried to come up with ways to find her, but without knowing her last name our options are very limited. We chatting about so many things at the club that night, yet we never exchanged our full names. All we know is she recently graduated from college and moved to Seattle with her best friend Kate. We know how Ana and Kate met, how they ended up as roommates and even how they ended up in Seattle (Kate was offered a job and her father bought her a condo). Yet, none of that information is going to help us find Ana. The hotel was able to tell us that a brunette left earlier that day with a driver from Uber. Of course Uber won't release any information about where Ana was taken to especially when we can't even tell them her last name. With no other leads, we reluctantly left Georgia and headed north with no destination in mind. We talked about driving straight to Seattle to find Ana, but the reality is that Seattle is a large city and the likelihood of us finding her is slim to none.

So for the last three days we've been just driving, neither of us really saying much. Like our trip this far, we have no map we're following; we're driving until we decide to stop then we crash a hotel and start all over the next day. That's the irony of the night we met Ana; it was the only time on the entire trip we went to a club or even a bar. Typically we get to the hotel, order delivery of some type, put a movie on and just chill. Maybe we would have stopped for a six pack of beer, but not typically. It was a spur of the moment decision to go to the club that night after hearing a couple of people talk about it on the elevator ride to our room that night. Wanting to do something different, I suggested we check it out if nothing else for a few drinks. Christian didn't want to go, but eventually he agreed.

I think it's safe to say that that night was nothing any of us expected, yet I know for certain that neither Christian nor I would ever forget. I like to think that Ana won't forget it either, but since we didn't have a chance to talk about it we'll never know. I've imagined what it would have been like if she hadn't left the next morning. Would we have gone our separate ways anyway? Would we have just stayed in Georgia for the rest of our trip and spend the entire week with Ana?

How is it one woman and one incredible night can have such an impact on you?

Christian and I agreed from that night, it wasn't just about the sex. Yes the sex was fucking incredible; there is no denying that there was a powerful attraction between the three of us. But, whatever the thing was between the three of us started hours before we ended up in a bed together that night. When we offered to buy Ana a drink at the club, something started right there between us. She was so easy to talk to, so easy to just be around and somehow she made us forget what we were driving across the country to try to forget. Dancing with her that night was the first time in years that my guard hadn't been up; I know the same was true for Christian or else the person who bumped into him never would have jostled him so much.

Either she didn't feel the same way or….

"Do you think we scared her?" I ask.

"I…I don't know," Christian sighs. "Fuck I hope not."

We play this game every few hours, where we try to come with reasons that Ana left that morning. We've come up with everything; she had a boyfriend/husband waiting at home (we both ruled that our real quick), she didn't enjoy what we did (again, that was ruled out quick), she was embarrassed (still on the table), she was ashamed (really fucking hoping that wasn't the reason), she only wanted a one night stand (most likely reason) or anything beyond physical attraction was only one sided (yeah, that one still stings).

Apparently I've turned into a goddamn girl, because all I can think about is wanting that feeling back. That feeling of being normal again; of not worrying, not panicking at every loud noise, not being on edge, not being uncomfortable around people who don't understand and not being on edge constantly. In the beginning, any time we spent stateside was hard but then it would end and when we returned to base everything was back to our new normal. But after awhile, even being at base didn't change things. That night was the first time in years I felt…something.

"I think we should chat with your brother," I say to Christian, my mind made up.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

We don't talk about it further, Christian simply turns around at the next exit and instead of heading east we now head west. Christian's brother, Elliot, has been bugging us both for the last year not to reenlist and instead to become partners with him in a construction business he wants to start in Seattle. He's been working for a company that he is unhappy at and wants to go out on his own, but doesn't want to do it alone. Christian worked construction along with Elliot in the summers before he graduated from high school so they both have the experience. While I never technically worked on a construction site, I know my way around home improvements and took plumbing courses in high school.

When Elliot found out we needed to decide soon whether or not to reenlist, he increased the pressure on us. Instead of mentioning it on calls and the few times we came back stateside, he conversation turned to almost weekly. We've talked logistics and it seems to make sense. Both Christian and I pretty much banked our pay so we could live off of that until the business really picked up. Christian and Elliot both have a trust fund that they plan to borrow against to start the business. This has been the sticking point for me because I don't have anything financially to contribute but both of them have assured me that this won't be an issue.

I have no doubt that if it weren't for me Christian would be in Seattle right now making plans to start the business. He did his four years and was done with the Air Force; I on the other hand struggled. While Christian and I are alike in many ways, this is the one area where we couldn't be more different. In Seattle, Christian has a family waiting for him. They were there when he graduated from basic and have been there for every leave he was granted. They invited me to come along and stay with them when we were on leave together. I have…no one. I have no family waiting for me, no home to go to….nothing. At least if I stayed in the Air Force I had something….the thought of leaving that petrified me. Even though Christian and I have literally been to hell in back in the last four years, I was the one considering reenlisting.

Until now.

Now…I want what we had that night with Ana. And I know reenlisting isn't going to help me find it again. How I'm going to find it I have no fucking idea. It's not like Ana was the only woman I've ever been with since I joined the Air Force, so I know it wasn't just the sex or being with a woman again that made me feel….like that. It was her; it was Ana. I have no fucking idea how I'm going to find what we had without Ana but what I do know is I'm not going to find it in the Air Force.

APOV:

"Let's go out Ana!" Kate bounces into my room.

"Nah, you go ahead, I'm going to do some job searching."

"Ana, you've been in here job searching since you got back last week. Take a break, a few hours away won't make you lose the perfect job opportunity. Besides it's a Friday night, no one's going to even look at your resume until Monday at the earliest."

"I know," I sigh. "You go ahead, I promise I'll go out next weekend with you."

"I'll hold you to do that Ana."

"I know you will," I giggle knowing that if I even try to refuse she'll drag me kicking and screaming all the way to the club. I've learned better than to go back on my word with Kate. I know I should go out tonight with her, especially after everything she's done for me but I'm just not in the mood to go deal with a group of people tonight.

"Don't mope all night Ana," she warns.

"I won't-"

"That's all you've been doing since you got back from Georgia. I know the funeral was hard-"

"It's not that."

"Then what is it Ana?"

I sigh, struggling with what to tell Kate. She doesn't know anything about that night; I feel like shit for keeping it from her but how the hell do you tell someone that you went out to a club, alone, and hooked up with not one but two complete strangers, went back to their hotel room and that night of your life? And that you then left because you were too scared to face them in the morning because you were worried that they would regret what they did with you when the alcohol wore of? And that despite all of that, you can't stop thinking of them and wondering where they are right and what they're thinking. That you're worried the demons they're trying so hard to hide from the world are going to eat them alive if they don't deal with it.

But the biggest thing that you're hiding is that you can't believe how much you miss them.

How do you miss two people you only knew for a few hours? How could you feel such an incredible connection to two people you barely know? How do you convince someone that that night was about far more than just sex? Hell, how do you convince yourself that night was more than just about sex? That's the question I've struggled with since I came back from Georgia. That night…I felt so connected to both Christian and Taylor. It was like nothing I've ever felt before. They made everything disappear; they made me feel wanted which is something I haven't felt in a very long time.

"You remember how I told you I missed my flight from Georgia because I overslept?"

"Yeah…" she sits down on the bed next to me obviously knowing this is going to be a long story.

"I overslept…but not for the reasons you think."

"Oh my God Ana you hooked up with someone, didn't you?" she nearly jumps off the bed in excitement. She's been after me for years to loosen up and have fun (which to her apparently means having lots of sex), but to her disappointment I never did.

"I did," I chose my words wisely because I don't think I'm ready to share what truly happened that night. "I went out like you suggested; I found a club not far from…my mom's house and took Uber there. I had a few drinks, did a few shots-"

"You did shots!?"

"Yup, several."

"Wow, I'm shocked."

"I was dancing when this guy tried to get a little too handsy, I tried stepping away hoping he would get the hint but he didn't. I told him to keep his hands off of me and then turned to walk away when I walked into someone. This guy…told the other guy off, telling him to leave me alone and that I made myself clear that I wasn't interested. Of course the other guy tried saying that the way I was dressed said otherwise-"

"The way you were dressed?!"

"Yeah, he was a real piece of work. Anyway, so the other guy bought me a drink and we sat and chatted for awhile. I have no idea how long we talked for, but…it was like talking to someone you've known a long time but haven't seen in ages if that makes sense. There was no uncomfortableness in talking with him, no weird silence or struggle to find something to talk about."

"Wow…that's great that you were so comfortable around him."

"Anyway, after awhile and a few drinks we started dancing. One thing led to another and…it was pretty steamy on the dance floor-"

"YOU!?"

"I know," I feel my face heat up remembering the dancing and make out session on the dance floor with Christian and Taylor. I kind of feel guilty about leaving out the fact that there were two of them, but I don't know that I'm ready to admit exactly what happened that night. Not when I'm still trying to wrap my own head around it. "I ended up there a lot later than I planned, but they ended up turning on the lights to announce it was closing time. That's when he invited me back to his hotel."

"Hotel?"

"He was…on a business trip so he was only in town for the night."

"Oh…"

"Yeah."

"But you went with him to his hotel."

"I did."

"And?!"

"It was amazing, Kate. Like nothing I've ever experienced before. And before you say it, I know I don't have much to compare it to but that night…I just felt so connected to him. God the way he made me feel….Kate you have no idea."

"Wow…Ana I'm shocked."

"I know. So was I."

"He was good?"

"Amazing."

"He made sure you came right?"

"Yes," my face is even redder I just know it. "Multiple times."

"Multiple?!"

"Yes."

"Holy shit Ana. So what happened in the morning? I assume you spent the night right? Tell me he didn't kick you out after you fucked."

"I spent the night."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What happened the next morning? What did he say? Did you trade numbers or just agree it was a one time thing?"

"Nothing happened?"

"Explain it to me, because I'm lost. When you woke up I'm sure you must have said something to each other. Unless…tell me he didn't leave you in his hotel room and check out without saying anything to you. Tell me he wasn't a dick like that-"

"No. He didn't leave."

"Ana…you left."

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I don't know," I shrug the regret still sitting heavily on my shoulders. "It seemed easier that way."

"Why?"

"There was no chance of it turning into anything more than a one night stand Kate. Why drag out the inevitable."

"You left."

"Yeah."

"Before he could leave you."

SHIT….she's right; I left before Christian and Taylor could leave me.

"Do you regret it?"

"What!? NO!"

"So why sit in your room moping so much?"

"I know this doesn't make sense, but I…I miss him Kate," both of them.

"It's understandable, Ana. You had an intense night with him; talking with him for so long probably made you feel close to him."

"Yeah."

"Did you get his number or anything?"

"No."

"Maybe you can track him down on social media? Most people are on facebook or Instagram or something these days."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"I don't….I don't know his last name," I'm so embarrassed.

"Oh."

"Yeah. So I can't contact him, can't find him….nothing."

"You just have to hope that if it were meant to me the universe would find some alternative way to bring you back together."

"You think?"

"I do. It happens all the time in movies and those books you read right?"

"I suppose it does."

"Come on, let's grab some ice cream and put on a good chick flick."

"I thought you wanted to go out?"

"I want to stay in now."