Chapter 3 : Confused feelings
All Marinette could think about was of Cat Noir. How she had to reject him once again… But she knew she didn't have a choice. She knew this was a sacrifice she had to make in order to protect the Miracle box.
She never paid much attention to her feelings regarding Cat Noir. She was certain that they were nonexistent. They were only partners and friends, that was it. But these new feelings just confused her even more.
When she lost Cat Noir for good in New York, she realized that she would be incomplete. She would never be able to replace him. She couldn't be Ladybug without her kitty. When he had left, she felt like a part of her had left along with him. When she saw him again, all she could do was run to him. She hugged him tightly, he was back in her arms and she wanted to make sure that he wouldn't leave her again.
That's when she realized that there were some hidden feelings. She wasn't sure what they meant though. There was a new tenderness that she felt towards him. It seemed new yet so familiar. Like it was always there but she never knew. Every nickname, every glance, every smile he gave her made her heart skip a beat.
It started to feel similar yet different to what she felt for Adrien. Her feelings for Adrien were still there, but there was something about Cat Noir that just made her think.
She knew that being with Adrien or Luka would be unrealistic in the long run. Being with either of them would mean she would have to constantly lie to her boyfriend. She already knew it was impossible to have a healthy relationship with anyone if it revolved around secrets and lies.
She knew that with Cat Noir, everything would be a lot different. He knew every struggle, they shared the same lifestyle. She was aware that no other guy would understand. If she and Cat Noir went on dates, and they were interrupted to stop an akuma, they won't be leaving each other behind. They would run together to the same place for the same mission.
They started to spend time together outside of work. She wanted to get to know him better. She called him a friend, but she didn't know him all that well. When their spring break came along, they hung out almost every day.
"Pound it!"
"M'lady, before you go. What would you say if you join me tomorrow for some ice cream? You know by the bridge to talk a bit, to get to know one another better."
"Um, if you insist then I guess we can. Tomorrow is when I get spring break so I'll be free.
"Wait, really?"
"Sure, I mean I usually just go out with friends the first day of spring break. But since you are one of my friends then yes."
"So wait, you are okay with me taking you out?"
"Sure, kitty why not? As long as this isn't a date."
"I mean, it COULD be a date if you want to m'lady."
Ladybug rolls her eyes smirking. "Kitty... you kn-"
"Okay, it's a date then. Just meet up with me at the bridge in the afternoon okay? See you tomorrow, bugaboo."
She hadn't realized how much fun it was to be around him. She never got bored of hearing him talk. There were things she thought she disliked from him that she now enjoyed. His sense of humor was something she didn't know she liked of him. She smiled and laughed at his jokes now. It had grown on her.
She realized that she just thought she hated it because he joked around when under pressure. It annoyed her because it was distracting them from their task. It was just a case of at the wrong place, at the wrong time.
As much as it pained her, she had to do it. She couldn't know who he was. If she did, it could come with consequences. It would put them both in immense danger. Especially now that she cared for the miracle box.
They need to wait, they needed to be patient.