Clark looked up and let the words hang in the silence between them, looking into his dad's blue eyes, Clark tried to read him, read the situation, all the time struggling to choose the right words, because all he could see at this moment in time was the hurt and pain still there clearly staring back at him, it hadn't really ever gone away it just need him to really look but there also seemed to be this little flicker of hope, and that's when the dam broke.

Chin quivering and the tears that were welling finally fell, "You've forgotten her already, it'll be like she never existed, you won't love her or me anymore," he sobbed. "You won't want me around anymore and I bet she has kids .. she does doesn't she and they're take over and take your time and then not only would I have lost mom but you as well," Clark crashed on boarding into hysteria.

Eddie looked at his son absolutely shell shocked, totally lost for words, he thought he had imaged all the things Clark could and would possibly say, his first go to was surprise and then maybe a little anger, but it never in a million years entered his head that Clark would think that Ed had stopped loving Sophie or him, Jesus nothing could be further from the truth.

He still missed Sophie every single day, he thought about her every single day, he woke every morning and the first thing he did was looked at her empty side of the bed, although that had become slightly less painful on the few nights Sam has slept beside him, but the smallest thing like a smell, a song or even an expression on Clark's face would remind him, and she would then flood his every thought, and the armour he had built around his heart would break all over again and bring him to his knees.

Dropping his head, squeezing his eyes tightly shut and pulling a lungful of air through his nose Ed bit so hard on his bottom lip the coppery taste of blood hit his tongue as he slowly breathed out.

Opening his eyes Ed reached out and pulled Clark into his arms rocking him back and forth, spending the next few minutes on the floor crying with his son as he let the pain wash over him again for the thousandth time.

"Oh buddy I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry," Ed repeated in a hushed voice raw with emotion, "Hey, shhh, it's alright, it's gonna be alright but you need to calm down and truly listen to me, can you do that for me?

Feeling Clark slowly nod against his chest Ed continued, "I could never stop loving you, you're the most important thing in the world to me, you are all I have left of your mom, and nothing could change the fact that I will love her and you till I take my dying breath."

Hearing Clark's hitched breathing slow Ed gradually released him from his embrace and move them so they were sitting side by side with their backs against the kitchen cupboards, slowly Ed placed his hand on Clark's tight just above his knee and gently squeezed, anchoring himself to his son and waited.

Clark wiped his eyes and then his nose on the sleeve of his hoodie, "I'm sorry dad I don't know where that came from," he mumbled.

Ed turned his head and looked at his son's grief stricken face, and was instantly taken back to the day when he had regained consciousness from his life saving surgery and he had looked directly over at Clark and knew without a doubt that Sophie hadn't survived the accident, "Hey you have nothing to apologise for, I get that this must be a shock for you but why would you think that I could ever forget your mom?"

"I panicked, when I lost mom I nearly lost you too, but against the odds you pulled through and stayed with me, and all I could think was that I'd definitely lose you this time around but in a strangely different way, a way I didn't know how I'd cope with seeing you with someone else," Clark stammered, "You replacing mom, and loving somebody else."

Ed gave a sad sigh, "Clark no one could replace mom, I wouldn't let that happen and you know Sam, he knows there is no way he could do that he wouldn't even try, he….."

Before Eddie could continue Clark cut him off, scooting across the floor away from his father so he could see his face properly, "Whoa, wait, what … stop … stop …. this Sam are you talking about Sam Braddock?'

"Hummmmm yeah," Ed slowly nodded swallowing down the panic that had started to rise inside him as he waited for the storm to hit.

"Team One Sam Braddock?" Clark almost shouted, his eyes now as big as saucers with surprise.

"Hu-huh." Ed nodded again.

Clark sat in silence a million thought running though his head, using the sniper breathing that Ed had taught him long ago to good use as he tried to not freak out more than he already had, his dad was not only dating a guy, but someone Clark knew and trusted as a family friend.

"How?"

Ed looked at Clark a little relieved that his first response hadn't been that he hated him, "What do you mean how?" Ed replied his eye brows drawing together in a deep frown.

"Like I said how?" Clark asked again, "Well I knew Sam was into guys but you ..."

This time it was Ed's turn to but in, "Excuse me?"

Clark felt his face slowly start to redden with embarrassment at his confession, "I just assumed Sam was into guys when I heard him turn Jules down at the team BBQ last summer, he said he liked her but you know not in that way, so Sam I'm not surprised about but you ... ha well that's totally different dad, is Sam some sort of rebound thing, is it a phase that after a few months you'll get over?" Clark's face took a serious look, "I don't want you getting hurt not like that again that's why I'm asking how."

Ed gave a short laugh at Clark's explanation of how he found out about Sam but that was short lived when he heard Clark explain why he needed to know how this relationship with Sam had come about and that Ed was serious about it and not just filling time.

As much as he didn't want to he was going to have to tell Clark about the day that after seemingly holding everything together for so long had finally come to an earth shattering stop, and he had hit rock bottom, and that's where Sam found him.