Keefe's POV:
Darkness.
That's all he could see.
Silence.
That's all he could hear.
Fear.
That's all he could feel
But Keefe remembered everything.
From him receiving the letter to rushing over to Loamnore to the shadowflux + ethertine process and Foster telling him to sleep, saying she'd be there.
He so much wanted to tell her that he loved her then and there, but...he knew that she was better off with Fitz, so he kept his mouth shut, as always
And now here he is, stuck in his own mind because of mommy dearest.
No matter how much he tried to get out, the inky blackness stretched on and on, neverending.
He wondered how much time had passed. Seconds? Minutes? Hours? Days?
He would sometimes hear a soft whisper of sophie's voice, but it will disappear just as fast as it came, as though he had only imagined it.
Did she miss him? Did she come to visit him? or did she just not care?
Was she with Fitz now? Laughing and snuggling with him?
Just before they had left for Loamnore, he sensed something had changed between her and Fitz, and when he'd asked her about it, she just grabbed his hand and pressed it to her collarbone. He had felt sadness, heartbreak, and greif pouring out of her, which he meant presumed that they'd broken up. But he wasn't sure.
His heart clenched as he thought of her, her beautiful brown golden-flecked eyes, always shining with a million emotions, her bright smile, adorable blush, charming laugh, long blond hair, small crease between her brows when she's worried...He could go on staring at her forever and would never get bored, that's how amazing she was, only she didn't see it herself.
But she wasn't his.
He knew that he didn't deserve her, but he couldn't help but fall helplessly in love with her, not only speechless by her beauty but also her spirit, her kindness; how she always cared for everyone, putting them before herself; her determination to do the right thing; the way she would frown, speak, laugh, blush, even cry; her adorable clumsiness; ohmigod, he loved that girl so much, only she didn't know that...
It pained him how oblivious she was, honestly.
He was foolish to think that he, the broken boy with family issues, would stand a chance against Fitz, the golden boy from the perfect family. He knew her little crush on him since he met her, oh yes, but when she had enhanced him in Lumennarnia, he had felt her emotions straight from her emotional center, and beneath all that panic and fear and stress, he'd felt another fluttery feeling, towards him
But maybe it just faded away...
Still, everytime, he would do anything he could to spend time with her, to make her smile, blush, laugh, and just as he will think he still has a chance, he would walk in and Keefe felt her heart flutter at the sight of him, while his heart would sink
He tried to ignore the pain in his chest at all the fitzphie emotions thrown around, but he still couldn't shake that feeling off
Sometimes he hated being an empath
And when they both started dating, he thought it was the end for him, but then he'd see her smile, and laugh at Fitz's jokes, he knew he was the one for her
It didn't matter who she was with, as long as she was happy, he was too
Maybe...maybe it was better if he stayed like this, trapped in his mind, away from reality...then he won't make reckless desicions and she'd be safe...she was better off without him anyways, he was nothing but a burden
Keefe he heard her soft sweet voice in his head again
Sophie? he tried responding, but he couldn't reach her
Keefe, if you can hear me, her voice began but it was swallowed up again by the darkness
He waited for her to talk to him again, but the longer he waited, the longer the silence stretched on
Suddenly, something slammed into his consciousness, erupting light, and he gasped
There was a crack
A crack in his mind
Was he...broken?