Chapter 3: Just let me adore you

Just let me adore you

Like it's the only thing I'll ever do

Adore You - Harry Styles

James was absolutely flummoxed. Here he was sitting next to Lily Evans and laughing! The fire whiskey was helping his frayed nerves, the hot spice coating his taste buds was itching for his tongue to become loose. He was very much a talker when he was drunk, so he was currently biting his tongue to stop the sloppy words from slipping out. His fingers were also fidgeting to touch the smooth skin that was currently beckoning him from his left.

Lily wasn't close enough to him on the couch for him to accidentally touch but his eyes often drifted and he knew his hands could reach there if they wanted. She was currently laughing freely at a joke Marlene had just said, he could feel the couch beneath him shake as she leant forward and called Marlene out on something.

"You said and I quote 'I like your hair" Lily cried out, her green eyes sparkling with mischief.

Marlene clucked her tongue, but a grin quickly formed on her face.

"That basically means 'I like you'" she whined, her grin turning bashful.

"Wait, you like girls?" Peter asked, his cheeks pink and his tone shaky.

The group laughed at Peter's naivety but Marlene continued to pout.

"But James likes Lily's hair and he likes her?" Peter spoke up angrily amongst the laughter.

This just caused the group to laugh louder, James however was scowling, not grateful that his crush on Lily was still being used as a joke. He also didn't want Lily to know it was still true, he was now sharing rooms with her, he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable.

Lily had turned her attention to James and James quickly covered his scowl with a sip of his whiskey. His eyes quickly darted to Marlene who was trying to reason her flirting tactics with Sirius.

"No you have to compliment her and that's what I was doing. If someone compliments me, I automatically think oh they like me!"

"Girls are so fucking weird. I compliment you all the time Marly, doesn't mean I want to fuck you" Sirius rolled his eyes.

"As much as I really don't want to admit this, Sirius is right, Mar" Lily spoke, her tone light.

"Wait, wait! I want to remember that moment forever" Sirius preened, crossing his legs underneath him on the floor and staring straight at Lily, as if he was trying to commit the entire atmosphere to memory.

"Fuck off Black, I mean, just because you compliment someone doesn't mean you like them, it definitely doesn't mean you want to fuck them"

James was still surprised by Lily's way with curses. She was the only girl he knew that had as bad of a potty mouth as Sirius.

"Then how do you know when someone likes you?" Marlene whined, directing her question to Sirius.

"Why are you looking at me?"

"Because you've slept with more girls than anyone here?" She gave him an incredulous look that was almost always evident when she was around the Marauders.

"How would you know that!?"

"Well Remus isn't the type to slide into just anyone's bed, Peter well no offence mate, I don't even think I've seen you flirt with a girl, James here keeps me up to date with his body count and lets just say its dismal at best and Lils and Mary have only just realised boys exist" Marlene explained with a grin.

Multiple complaints cried out at Marlene's explanation, James felt his cheeks blaze so hot that he was sure they would stay red for hours. Lily and Mary swore while Remus laughed and Peter sulked.

Sirius laughed at everyone's reaction but when he turned to face Marlene again he furrowed his eyebrows unimpressed.

"In my defense, I see sex as purely a physical act that's terribly fun. James is a corny romantic, Remus is stubborn and believes he can't get close to anyone and Pete here is still learning, aint ya Pete?"

Peter rolled his eyes but seemed to relax a bit more.

"Why does everyone think I'm corny? I can have sex without being romantic!" James finally added. The booze in his system was finally to the point where he couldn't keep his mouth shut.

Sirius laughed loudly while the rest snickered.

"I slept with whasahername and didn't even really like her that much!" James slurred angrily.

Remus chuckled.

"Her name was Rose"

"Whatever, I wasn't in love with her or anything and we had sex in a bathroom for crying out loud. That's not really very romantic!" he cried out, very unaware of the girls beaming grins.

"Merlin Potter, you sure know how to show a girl a good time" Lily threw out.

James froze, he completely forgot Lily was sitting right next to him hearing every embarrassing word he was slurring. He shrunk back into the couch and sipped on his drink.

Sirius eyed James knowingly and decided to move the conversation on.

"Marls darling, you know a girl likes you when she touches you more than she needs to, when she teases you in that sort of banterous flirty way and when you catch her staring at you when she thinks you're not looking"

Marlene raised one eyebrow.

"Like how Lily right now is blatantly staring at James?" she said, her lips pulled into a tight line so she wouldn't laugh.

James immediately turned his head towards Lily, catching her as she turns her attention towards Marlene.

"Fuck off Marlene, I wasn't" was all she said.

James couldn't help but smile.

"Evans, I don't blame you, I know I'm irresistible. It was going to happen sooner or later." He teased.

"In your dreams Potter"

He smirked in reply.

"See! That's flirting!" Sirius laughed.

Lily groaned and buried her head in her hands.

"I'm going to bed"

"Can I join?" James couldn't help but add.

She groaned again and shot James a look that could kill.

"Do you ever just stop?" she sighed.

"Never" he grinned.

He could have sworn that the corners of her lips turned up but she quickly shot up from the couch and headed towards her bedroom.

"Night everyone"

James watched as she disappeared behind her bedroom door and smiled to himself.

"Prongs" Sirius warned, although a broad smile was plastered over his handsome face.

James narrowed his eyes in response.

The next morning Lily gingerly forced herself to have a hot shower. The steam helped clear her head from the brain fog that was a side effect from the hangover potion she had sipped on before falling asleep. She very nearly knocked on James door to offer him some of her potion but she quickly remembered that last night was not out of the ordinary for him and that he had probably already had some.

This was debunked when she emerged from the bathroom, her hair wet, dripping hot droplets down her back and under her school blouse, to find James slumped over on the couch, his head in his hands. He groaned, causing Lily's body to freeze.

She looked at him side on, his dark hair was messier than usual, his glasses shoved on top of his head as he rubbed his eyes. Suddenly she felt a sharp pang in her stomach. The rawness and _ she was currently seeming him made her feel something entirely new.

"You would have thought someone like you would keep a hangover potion handy, Potter" she cocked an eyebrow as her voice woke him from his groaning. He looked up, and pushed his glasses back on, covering the dark circles she had just spied.

His eyes were wide as he took her in, her wet hair made the colour darker than usual, a drop of water was sliding down her throat and he had to keep himself from gulping loudly.

"Shove off, Evans. We're not all perfect like you"

His patience was thin from his restless night, he wasn't in the mood for Lily's berating but once he realised Lily was truly just joking, he felt a pang of guilt. She winced at his remark but quickly narrowed her once sparkling eyes and puffed angrily before she turned on her heel and into her room.

Their first week as head boy and girl did not go as Lily planned. The first night with the Marauders, Mary and Marlene was obviously something of an anomaly. She had spent the week, repeating rules and regulations to James, dragging Sirius by the cuff of his shirt and rounding on Peter for acting twelve. The only person that seemed to take her head girl duties seriously was Remus.

"Why couldn't you just be Head Boy?" Lily complained for probably the seventeenth time that week.

Remus grinned into his homework.

"It's like he's not even trying! Did I tell you what he did today?"

Remus tried not to roll his eyes.

"He just strutted into the library, talking rather loudly might I add, about how he tricked some first year into chewing on some tooth-splintering gum. The poor boy had to spend the night in the infirmary growing back his molars!"

Remus bit back a laugh.

"It's not funny! He's supposed to be Head Boy, he's not twelve anymore!" Lily complained, showing her parchment down angrily.

"Lils, this is James. He's always going to be pranking someone, if he wasn't there would be truly something wrong!" Remus found it hard to defend his best friend while also being on Lily's good side. He loved them both, but sometimes he found Lily to be a bit too judgmental when it came to his mates.

"He's seventeen now, can't he just snog some girl and that be his fun?"

"Would you rather find him snogging some girl in your common room or find him pranking a first year? That first year probably has some street cred now anyway. They all love being pranked by James"

Lily grimaced as she pictured James fondling some random girl on their couch.

"I would rather him do his job" she pouted.

"He is?"

"No he's not, he barely tells anyone off and he showed up late to this week's Prefect meeting! He makes me the bad cop and everyone runs from me now!" Lily whined.

Remus laughed at this but quickly shut his mouth at the painfully evil look Lily had just given him.

"You talk a lot about James" He murmured, finally getting exasperated with the topic.

"Do not!"

He raised his eyebrows at this. They had spent every spare moment in the library together, having taken the same classes this year, they found it was easier to spend their free periods studying together. Almost every single day this week consisted of Lily complaining about James' head duties or James living behaviour in their shared rooms.

"Yesterday you were complaining about how he leaves dirty mugs on the coffee table" Remus pointed out.

"Well it's gross!"

He sighed.

"Speaking of the arrogant prick"

James had just walked through the library doors, his robes billowing out behind him as he looked around for Remus. Lily's breath caught a little, as his eyes found hers.

Remus laughed lightly as he watched the two of them stare at each other.

"Yeah right, you 'hate' him" he muttered quietly.

"What?" Lily hissed, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Nothing"

"Mooney, there you are! Afternoon Evans, you alright?" James was now standing opposite them, his hands gripping the back of the chair in front of him.

Lily's eyes instantly went to his hands, she could make out the veins as he gripped the wooden curve of the chair. She fidgeted nervously in her seat.

Shaking her head she ignored James and turned her attention to her essay.

James smirked, catching the way Lily's eyes stubbornly refused to meet his.

"Just told the others to meet outside my dorms tonight, all good with you?"

Remus nodded.

"Groovy. See you later Evans" he tipped his head to Lily, Lily's eyes quickly darted to his but only for a second.

"Yeah, right" she mumbled in reply.

As Remus watched James saunter back out of the library, he pondered the interaction. James didn't need to come and tell him that piece of information, but he had obviously known Lily was going to be with him. He also noticed the way Lily watched James as he walked in, it didn't seem like she completely despised him as he originally thought.

"Interesting" he mumbled.

"What?" Lily demanded, noticing the way Remus's eyes filled with curiosity.

"Nothing" he smiled at his parchment, keenly aware that he might have stumbled upon something Lily wasn't even aware of herself.

Lily was curled up on the couch of her common room, her hands hugging a steaming hot mug of tea, when James strolled out of his bedroom humming.

He had his robes on, his hand carrying what looked like a blanket. Lily raised her eyebrows.

"Where are you going?"

James paused, realising that Lily was on the couch. He pushed his glasses up his nose and continued to walk past her.

"Out"

"Now?"

"Yes, now"

"But it's nearly curfew?' she spat, annoyed at his blatant disregard for the rules.

"Go to bed, Evans. I'll be back before curfew. Just got to do something quickly for the boys" he muttered before pushing open the door and leaving her alone, with just her mug of tea and the roaring fire.

This was how most of their interactions went. Short snippy comments, demanding questions from Lily and either exasperated replies or flirty remarks from James. She supposed it was better than the blown out arguments they used to get into but it wasn't exactly friendly like they had been on their first night. She had boiled that down to the alcohol, the friendliness between their group was probably just because it was their first night back and the excitement of their own head common room to play in.

Lily ended up pulling herself from the couch and going to bed. She wasn't going to stay up to see if James got back in time. He was probably running off to snog some poor girl, she didn't believe for one second he was helping the boys, whatever that meant.

She woke up the next morning feeling dazed and in an almost drugged state. She had struggled to sleep for the first few hours and had only fallen into a deep sleep that morning. This meant, her brain was still trying to wake up and her movements were sluggish. She rubbed at her eyes and she made her way to the bathroom. She was still in the midst of waking up when she pushed the door open to find the room filled with steam.

Opening her eyes a bit wider, she made out a silhouette of a broad shouldered bare-back. Noises started to finally register in her brain, the streaming sound of the shower and the sound of bare feet on tiles.

"Fuck!" Lily cried out, realising what had just happened. She quickly grappled onto the towel rack before she slammed straight into James.

He had just stepped out of the shower and was in the process of drying himself with a large white towel. She could only see his back as the towel was currently wrapped around his lower body in a haste.

"What the-" he spun round and found Lily, mouth wide open, eyes glazed.

The steam was still drifting around the bathroom, causing Lily's hair to slowly become frizzy.

"Evans" James greeted with a smirk.

"Shit, sorry. Didn't realise you were in here" Lily couldn't keep her eyes off his bare torso. She had no idea he was that lean and muscular. She figured it must be because of Quidditch and she suddenly realised why all the girls fawned over hot Quidditch players.

"If you wanted to join, you could have just asked"

Lily quickly pulled her eyes away and found James still smirking at her. He had obviously noticed her ogling him and her cheeks blazed from embarrassment.

"Shut up your prick, I was half asleep and didn't realise you were in here"

She didn't move though, she couldn't. Her feet were glued to the tiled floor.

"Your back has scratches on it" she managed to say.

His eyes narrowed before he tried to twist his head to look at his own back. Realising he couldn't possibly see, he tried to move himself in front of the mirror to take a glimpse.

Two long ragged slashes were cut deep into his back.

As he tried to examine the cuts, Lily felt her hands being pulled to the red marks curved into his muscular back. She skimmed her finger over the cut, the blood was dry but it looked a little swollen.

James flinched as he felt Lily's hand touch his skin.

"Sorry" Lily whispered, realising she must have hurt him.

"It doesn't hurt"

Lily paused.

"Right, I have some potion creams to help with that"

James was staring at her in the mirror, his eyes soft and curious.

"Yeah, that would be good thanks"

Lily nodded, not taking her eyes off his back. Something in her body was drawn to his skin. She felt her heart racing as she took him in. He definitely wasn't a boy anymore and something about that frightened her.

A tight cough from James knocks her from her trance. With a quick nod and a dip of her head to cover her bright red cheeks she hurries out of the bathroom.

James can't quite believe what he's seeing.

The girl of his dreams staring at his bare body in such a fluster her cheeks were practically the same fiery red as her hair. He couldn't help but blush also. Maybe he was dreaming?

Instead he quickly picked up his clean boxers off the floor and pulled them on under his towel. He was shamelessly hard, and that was just because Lily had been making eyes at him when he was practically naked.

He knew he would always feel differently about Lily than anyone else. It was like the brain pinged when he first saw her. Back then, when he was a measly eleven year old, he just thought he wanted to be her friend. It was like a magnetic force was pulling them together, he loved being near her, hearing what she had to say. It was just unlucky that the first time they were properly introduced, Sirius had pushed him into her and he had spilt his juice all over the poor girl. He was an eleven year old boy that had no idea how to make friends with a girl, so what did he do? He laughed. She had been out for him ever since. It was only in his fifth year, when his hormones became outrageously out of control, that he realised his attraction was physical as well as mental. He loved her mind, and had always thought it was spectacular, but when he started to really look at girls, that's when something in his brain snapped. Lily was breath-taking. He was so attracted to her sometimes, he had to mindfully calm himself down.

And here he was in a bathroom, they shared, partially naked and her tending to his wounds.

He was brushing his teeth when she walked back in, her hands clasped with a few bottles and a flannel.

"I made these myself, but I've used them before and they're all good. Do you mind?"

She put the small bottles on the counter, and motioned to the flannel in her hand. He nodded, his mouth still occupied with his toothbrush.

"One sec" he rinsed his mouth and chucked his toothbrush into the holder, before gripping onto the counter and baring his back to her.

James was much taller than Lily but the scratches were nearer the lower end of his back. She leaned forward and wet the flannel under the tap, trying to contain her gasp as she brushed against James forearm. She had felt a small shiver pulsate through her arm as their skin made contact.

As she cleaned his back a bit more thoroughly, scrubbing delicately at the dried blood, James couldn't help but try to peep at look at her in the mirror. He had to strain his neck a little to watch her.

Her cheeks were still tinged red, she was biting her lower lip as she cleaned the cuts. Every now and then she would press against his back with her free hand and he had to stop himself from being so obviously tense under her touch. His cock was growing harder by the second, it was every man's dream to be tended to be a beautiful woman. He fidgeted a little, trying to ease the tension between his legs, causing Lily to pause and look up worriedly.

"Sorry, does this hurt?" And

This time it was his time to blush profusely.

"No, no"

She nodded, and got to work with pouring the potion cream into her palm. Her fingers scooped up a dollop and she went to work on applying the weirdly green substance to the wounds. Instantly, he felt a tingling sensation zig-zag across his back.

"Woah" he mumbled, surprised at the sensation.

"It's already making the swelling go down, that's what it's for. With the other cream, the cuts will close, but there will be marks for a while" She mumbled. She was watching her hands stroke across the cuts, her eyes focused and her fingers light.

"You should be a healer"

Lily shot her eyes to his, in the mirror. She looked surprised.

"Well that's the plan" she gave him a tight smile.

"I thought you wanted to be a Potions Master"

Her eyes flickered to his again.

"How do you know that?" she asked, her tone thoroughly surprised.

"You told Remus a few years ago"

"Right"

"Why did you change your mind?"

She continued to work on his cuts.

"I thought a healer would be more beneficial in a time like this. I can still make Potions as I go but if I wanted to be a Potions Master, I would have to do a year in experimental assignments, and I think my time is used actually being helpful" She wouldn't look at him again, instead she wiped her hands on the flannel and popped the lids on the bottles.

"Don't you have to do years of training to be a healer?"

She looked up at this and actually smiled.

"Dumbledore has had me training with Pomfrey for the last year and a half, so I've already done a few modules and exams"

"Shit Evans, that's impressive. You're going to be like the youngest Healer ever" James couldn't help but say.

Lily blushed at this but shook her head.

"I just think Dumbledore wants help when he needs it. By the sound of it, I probably won't even be allowed to take up a position at St Mungos when I finish anyway... I've been doing my training in secret, so can you not let anyone know?" Her eyes drifted down, a sullen expression now haunted her face.

"Why wouldn't you get a position?"

"I'm a muggle-born Potter. Not sure if you've realised, but we're not really the prime candidates for institutions under the Ministry"

"That's fucking bullshit!" James shouted, turning around and facing Lily. She stepped back at his outburst but she chuckled.

"Yeah well, it doesn't matter. Maybe I can just help people on the side. It's not like I'm doing it for money anyway. I'll just get a muggle job to tide me over" She shrugged and piled her bottles into her hands and made to exit the bathroom.

Before she got too far, James grabbed her wrist and pulled her back.

"I'm sorry Evans"

She wasn't sure what he was saying sorry for, it could have been for a number of things. So she shrugged and pulled her wrist out of his grasp before it burnt her. She couldn't handle more skin on skin with James, it was starting to melt her thoughts into one big ball of questions.

"You're back should be fine now. Please just tell me you didn't hurt anyone to get that sort of injury?" She narrowed her eyes.

He rolled his in response, there was the Evans he grew to love teasing.

"No, it was just a prank on Sirius gone wrong" he lied, giving her a classic smirk. He pulled his fingers through his wet hair as he watched her exit the bathroom.

He could only think of one thing when he watched her tend to him.