Quick notes before we begin! MOST importantly, I have finals and testing starting this week, so as you know I usually post every Monday, but my upload schedule may get a little wonky during the next two weeks. I've tried to write ahead of time but all this studying has caught up to me and I'm not nearly as ahead as I would've hoped to be. I'll try to get another chapter out next week, but that may not happen. I'll be working my hardest, but please don't get mad and stop reading if I don't get a chapter out next week (or if it's posted a different day later in the week or whatever). I'm so sorry! After next week I only have a few things left for school but uploads should be normal. I'm so sorry guys!

Second, I have had to do a decent amount of research for this. Shockingly, I was not alive during this time and I also do not have the backgrounds of Steve and Bucky from the movies and the comics printed to the inside of my eyelids. So if some facts about the time period or the characters seem a little weird, unless I mentioned changing it, it probably has a root/truth somewhere.

If you have any questions about the history/references or whatever just let me know, I'd be more than happy to answer it (for example, gymnastics entered the Olympics in 1896,the U.S. military used gymnastics training throughout the 1800s, it could've been likely that Florence could have had training in it, etc.). Happy reading!

1941

"...and air forces of the Empire of Japan."

I was wiping down the bar when I heard someone turn the radio up. I turned towards the noise, seeing my coworkers all huddled around the box.

"Mary what'd you-"

"Shhhh!" She shoved a finger to her lips, and pulled my arm over to the radio.

"...Government and its Emperor looking toward the maintenance of peace in the Pacific." FDR. He was talking about the recent attack on Pearl Harbor. It was a bloodbath. One of the girls, to my left, was silently crying. Her fiance had been sent with the Navy out there. No word on him. "The attack yesterday on the Hawaiian Islands has caused severe damage to American naval and military forces. I regret to tell you that very many American lives have been lost." More crying by other girls. I wondered if they knew anyone stationed out there too. We all stood there listening, barely breathing, for minutes that felt like hours.

"With confidence in our armed forces with the unbounding determination of our people we will gain the inevitable triumph so help us God.

"I ask that the Congress declare that since the unprovoked and dastardly attack by Japan on Sunday, December 7, 1941, a state of war has existed between the United States and the Japanese Empire." No. He actually did it. I didn't think that any of those suit-wearing bastards had the balls to declare war. And with how things were right now? I didn't think our country could handle another war. The crash still left so many jobless, homeless, and hungry.

Some of the men at the bar were whooping, nationalist war mongrels. I rolled my eyes. Yes, I thought it was time we entered the war, even though I didn't think it would actually happen. No, I didn't think it was a cause for celebration. War meant death and suffering. Even if it was necessary.

I finished my rounds around the restaurant, handing out tabs and finishing off rounds. I found it funny that even when people were broke and their families were on the fritz, they still found change for alcohol.

I took off my apron, put my jacket on and stopped by the office on my way out to let my manager know I was going.

It was a cold day, light snow on the ground from earlier in the morning, with a bright white sky. It should be sunset, but the cloud cover was so thick you couldn't tell. I stood outside the bar, I had a few minutes to spare. I found my cigarettes in my purse quickly, I kept them in a little inside pocket for that purpose, but for some reason I couldn't find any damn matches. I stood there shuffling things around in my bag for a few moments before a voice made me look up.

"Heyyy, missy." A man stumbled out of the bar, he was wearing a long coat, his hat askew. He was drunk, which could either be a good thing- his reactions would be delayed and getting away would not be a problem- or it could be dangerous for me- he might pursue me and he was quite large.

"Get lost." More rummaging for my matches, not bothering to make eye contact.

"Ouch she's a feisty one. C'mon kitten didn't ya hear the, hear the news? There's a war's comin'. They're gonna be shipping me off. What if I never make it back to see you again, kitten. Wouldn'tcha feel bad about turning me away then?"

Eww. What a pervert. "Can't say I would." I found my matchbox, lit my cigarette, and turned to walk away.

"Heya kitten, mind sharing?" He was next to me and reached out for the cigarette in between my lips.

"Watch it, will you!" I swatted his hand away.

He leaned against me, walked forward til my back made contact with the brick wall behind me. He put his hands on the wall on either side of my head. "Now don't tell me I've found the one waitress in the whole of Manhattan who won't put out," he sneered. What is it with people thinking I'm a hooker? I don't look like that, do I?

"Well congrats, it's your lucky day! See you later, soldier!" I gave a little two-fingered salute, and went to slip under his arm.

"Listen here missy! Don't you ever talk to a man like that! You hear?" He had grabbed my face and pulled it towards hime. Have I mentioned that I hate drunkards? I pulled my knee up to his crotch. He let go of my face and leaned over, cursing me out.

"I'll get you, kitten! Gah you bitch." He wheezed, turning to walk back towards the bar.

When I was younger, I would've hung around and went a few rounds with him. Make sure he learns a lesson or something like that. But now? I didn't see much of a point. He wouldn't be able to walk it off in that state, and the odds of him trying this to another girl were definitely lower now. And besides, I was now running late.

I worked a few odd jobs, here and there, in addition to my regular waitressing. Yay. Right now, I was running late to an overnight nanny gig- covering for one of the girls at the bar who was sick.

I wasn't too big on kids, I tolerated them sure, but they didn't seem too into me. Maybe they sensed my nervousness or something, like a wild animal. Who knows.

This family I was nannying for was loaded, whatever business they were in must've benefited from the crash. It was in Brooklyn Heights- a fancy apartment, a car, the whole shebang. Not a bad place to get paid to spend the night.

By the time I got there the sun was down, and the wind was picking up. Snow banks were changing their shape, and ice crystals would slap your face. There was $10.00 left on the kitchen table for me, with the phone number of the place the couple had gone too. The children were already in bed, my job was to just lock the door and stay awake in case anything happened. Easy money. And ten bucks for this? How rich were these people? Nobody could throw around ten bucks for a one night nanny gig.

I went into the living room to retire to the couch. It was so warm and comfortable, I hadn't been in a place this cozy in probably five years. I was fighting to keep my eyes open, I didn't get more than four hours of sleep a night between all my jobs, when I finally succumbed to sleep.

I was in a dark hallway, walking towards a door. I could hear people in the room beyond, but I couldn't make out what they were saying. It was two voices, male and female, but I couldn't match them to a person.

I looked around the place I was in, it was very familiar. I've been here before. But where was here?

I approached the doorknob, reaching out for it. I needed to know who was on the other side of the door, I needed to know what they were saying. I didn't know why, but I knew it was important.

I hesitated for a moment, trying to remember where I was and why I was snooping around. Gripping the cool metal handle, saying a quick prayer, I turned it and pulled the door open. I was face to face with the two voices' bodies. It all came back to me.

The boy looked scared and upset, the fear and guilt coming from him was tangible. The girl, also looking startled, had a smug undertone to her surprise.

"How could you!" I felt the words come out of my mouth before I finished processing what was happening.

"Flor, I didn't mean to- it's not like that-" The boy had jumped up and was quickly putting his shirt back on.

"What do you mean not like that? Do you think I'm stupid? Look at you!" I marched into the room, the boy coming up to me.

He started, "Flor I swear I didn't-"

SLAP. I hit him as hard as I could across is cheak.

"How could you?" I yelled, tears starting to spill over my eyes. "I don't care who you sleep around with, but with her?" I threw my finger out, pointing at the girl. "How could you? I hate you Bucky! I hate you!"

I was in hysterics, a full blown angry cry. I turned on my heel and walked out of the room. I heard the girl say "Buck, come back to bed. She's not worth it."

"Shut up Dot." He pushed past her and went after me, grabbing my shoulder and turning me around. He pushed his face to me- a quick, searing kiss.

I pulled my hands up to his chest, and for a second I wanted to lean into him more than I had wanted to do anything else in my life.

I remembered myself, and I remembered what he did. I pushed him off of me, spit on his feet, and turned back around. He didn't try to stop me again.

I woke up in a cold sweat. It's been years and yet that nightmare of a day still haunted me. I looked to the clock on the wall- 9:30. Shit. I jumped up, looking around, expecting to be in deep trouble. I had one job- stay awake- and I couldn't even do that.

Wait a minute, there's nobody here. I checked around the apartment- no couple. They were supposed to be back by 7:30. Where was everyone? I went back into the sitting room to look around, maybe there was a clue as to where they were or why they didn't come home.

I saw a small family picture above the fireplace. Picking it up and studying it, I saw the faces of the couple for the first time. The woman looked familiar, very young, she couldn't have been older than twenty-two, with light hair and a familiar soft face. It couldn't be… fuck.

For the second time in the past five minutes, I jumped and scrambled around again. This time I grabbed my shoes, jacket, and purse, and put the money back on the table. I had to get out of here, now. I ran outside, and down the block before I stopped to even check and make sure I had all my belongings. I was carrying my shoes, my feet burning from the raw contact with the snow covered cement. I put my jacket and shoes back on, checked my purse, grabbed a cigarette, and took off.

I hadn't even known she was married. I mean, granted I haven't spoken to her or seen her since I was eighteen. God she was so young though, she'd only be what, 21 this year? And two kids, according to the picture at least. Oh god, what if they weren't even there when I arrived, I hadn't checked the bedrooms. They looked like they were still toddlers, I don't think they would have snuck off.

This was weird. Who did she marry that they had all this money? $10 was ridiculous. And where were all of them?

I should've gone back to my apartment, gotten some more sleep and have something to eat before I went to my shift this afternoon. I should've put it out of my head, it was probably just someone's idea of a dumb prank, I had enough people out there that didn't like me that it could be plausable. I shouldn't've gone to the police station. I shouldn't've filled a missing persons report for the whole family. It would've been so much better for my mind if I went home.

Shit. I knew the policeman at the front desk.

"Carl."

"Florence," he said without looking up, "it's been five years, what drew you out of whatever hole you're living in."

"Listen Carl I got something serious here."

"Yeah, I bet. Listen if some guy tried to pull something, I can't do much and I'd think that you'd be able to have that under con-"

I gave him the picture. I hadn't realized it was still in my hands when I left the apartment until I went to grab a cigarette.

"Fuck." His face went white.

"I was covering a nanny gig last night over in the Heights. All gone. Nobody came home. Don't think anyone was there when I got there."

He took a minute before saying something about some missing person reports starting to come in, I guess a lot of young men were scared of a draft now that we were in the war.

"No you don't understand- the entire family is gone. A baby, a toddler, a 21 year old woman. This isn't a plot to get out of a draft that hasn't even happened yet. Carl, c'mon this is no good."

He filed the reports, and I have never seen him look so solemn before.

It was six days before I heard back from the police.

A car was found in a bay out on Long Island. Police from there hadn't been searching the waters because they had no missing person or stolen car reports, and the Brooklyn police didn't think to look out there. A clamming boat found them at the bottom, a few yards out from shore, so it wasn't too deep. They pulled out all four bodies.

My little sister was dead.

Carl found out right away, obviously. I had given him my phone number and address when I saw him, so they could tell me if they found anything. They were unable to contact my father.

Carl planned the wake and funeral. It was small, just a few friends had stopped by here and there, nobody from Elle's husband's, who I'm told was named Anthony, family.

Carl was married now too, I had never met his wife before but she seemed decent. She was a tiny woman, with a mousy face, probably had a wit to match Carl's, but I wasn't privy to seeing a happy side of her.

I wanted to press Carl for answers, but I didn't even know where to begin. We went to a bar that night, not the one where I work at, I was able to get off tonight. A lot of the girls had been offering to pick up my shifts, but I liked working while the cops were out looking, it gave me something to distract myself with. The cops were still trying to figure out if it was accidental or suicide.

Carl finished the drink he was working on, placing down his glass with a little too much force.

"What's happened since I left?" I didn't know how to voice everything I wanted to know, but I felt like the answer to that would cover most of the information I needed.

"She got married a few months after she turned 18, in the early spring. It was a small wedding, down at the courthouse. She didn't think you'd want to come, had it in her head you didn't want to speak to her again, so she didn't ask.

"First baby came a few months later, I think that's why they married so quickly. He was 21, so pretty young too. Baby was a girl, they named her Diane Florence." I felt my breath catch. Elle was so convinced I hated her, I was so awful to her I never even got to meet my niece. A niece who was named after me.

"Baby two came along over the summer, Anthony Carl." The waitress brought over another whiskey, and Carl took a long, slow sip before continuing.

"They were happy, you know? At least that's how I knew them to be. I wouldn't've let her be with him if he wasn't good to her. Far as I know he never hit her or swore. Hell, they lived a comfortable life, that's for sure. His family was in oil.

"We don't know what or why. There's no evidence of tampering with the car or bad weather that night. Don't know why they were in Long Island, or why the kids were with 'em." We were silent for a while after that.

I hated the not knowing. I hated myself, I felt guilty as hell. If I had noticed earlier, if I hadn't been a temperamental kid that day… not long after a familiar scrawny blonde boy came in.

"Heya Steve."

"I heard about Ellie, I'm so sorry. Funeral tomorrow?" I nodded. "I'll be there." He looked very determined, like his life's goal was being there for us tomorrow. God, I had missed Steve. He's the best man I've ever known.

We stayed there for a while, the three of us, making small talk, reminiscing about our childhoods, remembering Elle. Steve bought a few more rounds than I planned on having, and by the time they kicked us out of the bar I was very inebriated. I had only been drunk once before, hated it, and swore off getting that intoxicated again. Until now.

Carl had left some time ago, and they ended up kicking out me and Steve. I don't know why I did it. I never felt that way for Steve before. I didn't think he had liked me in that way before. But regardless, we were both drunk, and I leaned in and kissed him.

Hehehe leaving you all on a cliffhanger when I might be able to give you another chapter for a bit. I know I'm evil, but you love me. Really sorry about the update issue but we'll see how it goes. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter, leave a review if you did (or if you didn't, it's still appreciated). I hope you're all doing well, I'm sending love! Good luck to anyone else in school or university with exams coming up!

Citation notice- I used the Library of Congress Website to get the FDR speech used in the beginning.