Thank you all!
Chapter 3
Yorkshire – 1912
He couldn't believe that this was happening, or rather that it had been happening for the past couple of days. He lifted the strawberry from the basket and brought it up to Anna's lips, she happily bit the end, before leaning forward and giving him a quick, but chaste kiss. He could taste the sweetness from her lips and he daren't deepen the kiss, though it was all he could think to do.
They were sitting by a pond all alone on a picnic blanket. Anna had suggested it, saying that here they could be free with no one's eyes upon them. He knew now that Anna was to be engaged soon, yet he didn't care.
This was very unlike him, acting like a foolish school boy with a woman he had only met a few days prior. Normally, he was very sensible and had his wits about him. He knew what the future should look like for him and it didn't include someone as perfect as Anna. He was just a worker who traveled from place to place to send money home to his mother. That was all he ever would be. However, when he was with Anna, she made him feel like he was more than just that.
"Where all have you been?" Anna questioned, adjusting her dress below her.
"Everywhere," John answered, making Anna's face brighten. She inched closer to him and her hand fell to the top of his knee.
"I could come with you," she nearly whispered, chewing down on her lower lip. John laughed, but her face fell. "You don't want me to come with you?"
"You have a wonderful life here, Anna. Why would you want to come with me? You'd have nothing."
"I'd have you," she said, her cheeks slightly blushing. This only made her more beautiful than ever.
"You don't know me, Anna, not really. I'd never allow you to give up everything for me. What if a year down the road I make you miserable?"
"You won't," Anna promised.
John solemnly chuckled. "You can't know that. We've only just met, my darling."
"But I do know it, John. I feel it, right here." She pressed firmly against her chest, right where her heart was. Then she grasped at his hand and brought it to the valley between her breasts. His breath hitched within his throat and he had to fight against the propriety that made him feel the need to yank his hand away, because it was the last thing he wanted to do.
"Don't you feel it?" Anna asked, nearly breathless. John could only nod, as he slid closer to Anna and caught her lips again. Deep down his sense was screaming at him to stop, that this was unfair to Anna, but he found he struggled to control himself when he was with her. There was something that drew the both of them together and he knew that it wasn't just the thrill of it. No, there was some connection that could not be explained.
His sense didn't kick in until he had lowered Anna down to the blanket so that he could cover her and his lips had begun to trail down her porcelain skin. Anna happily moaned, her hands grasping at his back. That was when John jerked up, realizing what he was doing.
Anna's lips curled down into a frown and she slowly sat up, a hurt expression covering her features.
"We can't do this. We shouldn't be doing this." John stood, brushing the grass of the tops of his trousers.
"But…"
"I don't want to ruin your reputation. This right here could ruin it."
Anna gathered her skirts and stood up straight, her brows creased with upset.
"I don't care."
"You should," John said with a shake of his head. "You have a bright future ahead of you. Knowing me for two days is not enough to throw all of it away."
"But I love you, John Bates!"
"You don't love me," he disagreed, though he knew he felt the same about her. "It's only been two days."
"Romeo and Juliet fell in love and decided to marry within a day's time."
"And look at how well that turned out for them, Anna," John tried to reason. "We must stop this."
Anna didn't listen. She only moved closer to him and placed her hand on his cheek. His eyes closed, relishing in the touch of her skin against his.
"Walk me home," she whispered. All John could do was agree. He couldn't tell her no.
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Her fingers were entangled with his as they went down the back alley that led to the back door of her home. She knew that this was pushing her luck being out where they could possibly be seen, but Anna knew the less traveled routes.
They reached the door and Anna paused, turning to face John. She bit down on her bottom lip and twisted his hand around in hers.
"I better get going," she whispered. She stood on her tiptoes and gave John a quick kiss. "I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Absolutely," he smiled.
He winked, before walking away. Anna felt as though she was walking on a cloud, turning to open and enter the back of her home. The moment she stepped inside her stomach fell.
"What do you think you are doing?" Her mother's harsh voice lowly growled. Anna moved back slightly, her hand clasping to the cloth of her dress.
"What do you mean?"
"With that…that boy!"
Taking in a deep breath, Anna shook her head. "What does it matter to you? I like him."
This only angered her mother more. She knew her mother was expecting Anna to lie and say it wasn't anything.
"You don't like him," her mother bit. "You don't even know him. You are to marry Edward. He's proposing on Saturday and you will say yes."
"No," Anna disagreed. "I don't want to marry him. Father says I'm too young."
"Your father told Edward he could have your hand just today," Agnes informed Anna. Her heart twisted and her body tightened. "Now, enough of this foolishness."
"You can't make me," Anna lifted her jaw.
"Oh, I can and I will, Anna May Smith. I won't let you throw your life away."
Anna sighed. Her arms crossed tight across her chest and she stood taller.
"You will tell him yes," her mother told her again. "And that is all I have to say about that."
Her mother turned and made her way up the stairs. Anna went into her bedroom and closed the door loudly, hoping the sound irritated her mother. Then she opened her window and searched to see if John was still in the alleyway. But there were no figures in the distance.
Slumping onto the bed, Anna let out a small breath. Married. Edward was going to be able to officially ask her to marry him. She wanted to scream. She wanted to find John and beg that they run away with one another. This home was stifling. When she was around John she felt freer than she ever had. It didn't matter that it was only two days, she knew that he was her future.
Her strong demeanor faded then and harsh tears filled her eyes. Before she could control it, they started to fall down her cheeks. She curled her hand into a fist and hit it against the mattress, anger consuming her. She hated her mother and she hated her father. How dare they decide what was best for her?
A knock came at the door and Anna glanced up, finding her father's head peeking through the doorway. She quickly wiped her cheeks with the back of her hands and sat up.
"I won't marry him," Anna told her father. Her father frowned, going to sit down next to her on the bed.
"He's a good man, Anna. He'll take care of you when I can't," Walter said, calmly.
"But what if I love someone else?" Anna questioned her father. He chuckled.
"Oh my dear daughter, you will grow to love Edward. He cares for you. He wants to give you the world." Anna huffed, knowing that her father wasn't listening to her.
"But what if…"
"I've accepted it, Anna. Now you must."
Anna took in a shaky breath. She picked at the edge of her dress and twisted her lips. It was clear that neither of her parents would listen to any reason.
"I'm tired," Anna then said. "I should go to bed." Her father smiled at her and kissed her cheek.
"Yes, sleep up, my darling girl. Goodnight."
Yorkshire – 1937
Anna couldn't believe it. She nearly pinched her leg thinking that this had to be a dream. She had dreamed of him so many times before now. He was older, but then, so was she. There were streaks of gray around his hairline and she found she liked the way it made him look more refined. But as her eyes fell to the cane in his hand, she wondered what had happened for him to need that. Had he been hurt?
"I knew you would be here," John said, stepping closer to her. They were still separated by the counter, but John still rested his hands on the wood so that they almost touched Anna's own hands. She inhaled sharply.
"I never left," Anna uneasily replied. "I have always been right here."
She watched as John shuffled on his feet.
"I know."
Anna furrowed her brows then and she could feel the tears threating to spill from her eyelids. He always knew she was here. Her shaky hand came up to brush against her cheek.
"Why didn't you come back for me?" She hated how needy she sounded.
"Why didn't you write back?"
This caused her head to turn to one side. "Write back?"
"To my letters. I wrote you every week for many years, Anna."
"No," Anna whispered. Her hand pressed against her chest, her heart was racing against her ribcage. "I never…." A tear finally slipped. John's thumb wiped it away and she nearly gasped at the feel of him against her. She stepped backwards.
"I'm sorry," he murmured. She shook her head.
"I never received any letters, John," she then strongly stated. John's brow creased.
"I sent them to your home and to this address."
Mother, Anna thought. But she let out a shaky breath, "It doesn't really matter, not anymore, does it?" She knew it was a lie. It did matter. How would things had changed if she had gotten those letters?
She could tell her words had hurt John. His hands slipped off the wood of the countertop and he stepped back slightly.
"I waited for a long time at the station, Anna," he said instead.
"I wanted to come." Anna met his eyes. "But we can't dwell on that, can we?" She tried to sound bright, but it just came out awkward. "It's been twenty-five years. We've both led on our lives since then. Are you here for a visit?"
"No, I've come here to live. I have a job at Downton Abbey."
"Stay?" Her breath stuck in her throat. But she attempted to brush it off.
"Yes. Lord Grantham has offered me a new position, one where I'll serve as his helper at Downton."
"That sounds nice." Anna couldn't quite steady herself; the world spun around her. All she had wanted the past twenty-five years was to be near John, to see him again. And he was here, but nothing was right. She didn't know how to make it right again. She was no longer that bold young woman who didn't care what anyone thought about her. No, she had been through so many things over the years, things that made her forget who she used to be.
"Quite," John cleared his throat. "Well, I only wanted to come and say hello. I figured that would be better than running into one another."
"Right," Anna breathed, her eyes falling to her hands that were clasped tightly together in front of her abdomen. She twisted them, before rubbing them together. There were so many words trapped between them, none of them said.
"Goodbye."
She heard the door swing opened and closed, before a quivering breath escaped her dry lips. Her hands now pressed together and came up to sit on her lips. He was back. He was really back.
Being so lost within her thoughts, she hadn't heard the door open up behind her. So when there was a kiss on her cheek, she jumped, startled. Hands landed on her upper arms to steady her and she heard a gentle voice in her ear.
"Sorry, Mum." Anna glanced up and smiled at her son. "I didn't mean to spook you. I got the invitations to Jenny. Did I hear the doorbell? Do I need to print anything?"
"No," Anna reassuringly told her son. "It wasn't anything important." The lie felt uneasy on her lips, but she was able to play it off well enough. She patted her son's upper arm and nodded. "I'm going to go upstairs for a bit. Can you cover for a while?"
"Of course, Mum."
To be continued...