Chapter Three

"Dancing With Myself"

Hudson-Hummel Residence: Friday, April 21

The interior of Finn Hudson's bedroom was dark save for the string of white twinkly lights framing the window above his bed. The twinkly lights had been Kurt's idea – along with the dark throw pillows on his bed and the papasan chair next to his bookcase. Sometimes Finn would come home from school or Burt's garage and there would be a brand new lamp or a giant candle and he would just go along with it. The last thing he wanted to do was insult his stepbrother's design sensibilities – especially after the lamp incident from last year.

Finn lie flat on his back, arms tucked behind his head, staring blankly at the ceiling. His headphones were plugged into his phone and he was listening to a playlist he created awhile back. The name of the playlist was "Songs That I Like That Rachel Also Likes". There was only one song: The Cure's "Love Song". He had heard her singing it one day and he had explained to her it was a cover of The Cure's version. He then played The Cure's version for her and she said she liked it – even though she liked Adele's version better.

Finn rolled over on his side. There on the table beside his bed was a picture of he and Rachel set inside a silver frame Kurt had bought him for Christmas. The photo had been taken at their very first Regionals. The two of them looked so happy despite New Directions coming in last place. Finn groaned, punched a pillow and then tossed it across the room. He flopped onto his bad and closed his eyes and thought about his last conversation with Rachel.

It had been two days since Rachel invited him over to her house presumably to fool around while pretending to watch Downton Abbey. When he arrived, Rachel answered the door wearing the bright green dress that he liked. Her hair fell over one shoulder and he noticed she was wearing the necklace he had bought her for Hanukkah. Rachel Berry – his girlfriend – looked hot.

Finn looked down at his own clothing. He was wearing a Pink Floyd t-shirt that he pulled from the hamper, a pair of jeans and the sneakers he wore whenever he did yardwork. He felt like such a schlub standing next to her.

Rachel reached for his hand and pulled him through the front door. She led him into the kitchen and had him take a seat at the table.

"I made you some vegan peanut butter cookies." Rachel sat a platter of cookies down on the table and sat down in the chair across from him. "I know they're your favorite."

"Awesome," Finn said as he reached for one. It wasn't that they were his favorite. They just so happened to be the one vegan thing Rachel had made for him that didn't make him want to throw up.

Rachel waited for him to finish the cookie before she spoke. "Um, Finn. We need to talk."

"About?"

"Us," she said. "We need to talk about us."

Finn swallowed the final bite of cookie. "Okay …"

"So, you know how I don't like long-distance relationships."

Finn furrowed his brow and said, "No – I didn't know that."

"Oh," she said. "Well, um, as you know, come fall, I'll be leaving for NYADA."

"I'm well aware," Finn said not liking where this was going.

"And you'll be staying put, here in Lima, for the foreseeable future."

"Rachel, what are you trying to say?"

"I hate this-I hate this-I hate this," she said. "Okay, I'm just going to rip the band-aid off and yes it will hurt but only for a little while. Finn, I believe it would be in both our best interest to end things now rather than prolong the inevitable."

Finn's eyes narrowed as he tilted his head. "You're breaking up with me?"

"Finn, I'm just trying to do what's best for our futures."

Finn sneered and said, "You mean what's best for your future." He stood up and said, "You're heading off to the Big Apple to become the toast of Broadway and you're worried about your hick boyfriend from your Podunk hometown dragging you down."

Rachel audibly gasped and suddenly stood from the table. "Finn – that is not true. You're not just my hick boyfriend."

"You're right. I'm just the guy who means so little to you that you're willing to just end our relationship over a plate of shitty cookies like it's nothing."

Finn backed away from the table and turned to leave the kitchen. Rachel grabbed his arm and spun him around to face her.

"Finn – I love you. And it hurts me to do this. This isn't easy for me."

Finn shook his head and said, "You know, Santana was right. You are selfish."

"Wow, Finn … that was … that was harsh and I do not deserve that," Rachel said as she jabbed her finger in his chest.

"Then why won't you fight for us?" Finn asked.

Rachel opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. She lowered her head and looked down at the floor.

Finn nodded and without a word he left the Berry residence. He pulled out of her driveway, his heart in a million tiny pieces and drove home. He walked past his mom and Burt who were watching one of their sitcoms and climbed the stairs to his bedroom. Collapsing on his bed, he pulled out his phone and found a playlist he had created in math class one afternoon. There was only one song. He pressed play.

The music was gone. Finn opened his eyes and nearly jumped out of his skin. There was Kurt standing over him with a concerned look on his face. Finn yanked off his headphones and sat up in bed, propping his back against the headboard.

"Kurt, what are you doing?" he asked.

Kurt folded his arms over his chest and said, "Get. Up."

"Wh-what? Why?" he asked.

"You've been walking around like a zombie for two days now and people are starting to notice."

"In case you haven't noticed, Kurt, I'm sort of going through a breakup right now."

Kurt sat on the edge of his bed and sighed. "You want to talk about it?"

Finn reached for one of the throw pillows and clutched it to his chest. "There's nothing really to say. Rachel doesn't want to be with anymore."

"And you're sure that's what she said?"

"Actually she was all like it would be in both our best interest if we ended things right now instead of waiting for the inevitable."

"Yikes," Kurt said. "I'm so sorry, Finn."

Finn shrugged and said, "Can't say that I blame her. If I were going off to New York to become famous, I wouldn't want to have some Lima Loser tethered to me."

"Nope," Kurt said hopping up from the bed. "We are not going down this road of self-pity, Finn Hudson. Get up now and follow me."

Finn opened his mouth to protest but before he knew it, Kurt was pulling him out of bed and out of his room. They headed down to Kurt's room in the basement.

"You and I are going to order pizza and then we're going to watch those silly car movies you like," Kurt said as they entered his room.

"Silly car movies?" Finn asked.

"You know – the ones with the Rock and the guy that voices Baby Groot."

"You mean The Fast and the Furious?" Finn asked.

Kurt nodded as he cleared off the sofa in the corner of the room.

"You hate those movies," Finn reminded him.

"Remember last year when I got the flu?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah – you were so miserable. I felt so bad for you."

"Remember how you made me soup and you sat and watched that America's Next Top Model marathon with me?"

Finn nodded and plopped down on the sofa.

"Well – you're pretty miserable right now so I want to take care of you the way you took care of me."

Finn ducked his head and said, "Gee Kurt – you don't have to do that for me."

"I want to. C'mon, Finn, let me spoil you." Kurt took out his phone. "So, I'm going to order the pizza and why don't you get the movie set up."

Finn started to get up from the sofa to run upstairs to grab the DVDs but then he noticed the folded piece of paper on the cushion next to him. He picked it up and saw that it was a brochure for some sort of summer camp. Camp Black Bear. There was a photo of a redhead kid with freckles and braces. He was standing at the edge of a dock holding a fishing pole.

"Okay – pizza's ordered and it should be here in thirty minutes," Kurt said.

Finn looked up from the brochure and asked, "You thinking about going to camp this summer?"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "No – I'm thinking about applying to be a camp counselor at a camp for LGBTQ+ kids. I was meeting with Ms. Pillsbury this afternoon and she was telling me about it and it sounds really cool."

"I used to love going to summer camp," Finn said. "It was like having this group of friends separate from your regular group of friends at home."

"I never went to summer camp," Kurt said. He plopped down next to Finn and sighed. "I was afraid I wouldn't fit in."

"That's the beauty of summer camp," Finn said, a giant grin on his face. "No one is left out. I would love to go back."

Kurt turned to face Finn. "Maybe you should apply, too."

Finn laughed. "It's a camp for LGBT kids."

"But you would potentially be a counselor and I don't think it matters for the counselors just so long as you're creating a safe and accepting environment for the campers."

Finn leaned back and tucked his hands behind his head. "It sure would be nice to swim in a lake and fish and roast marshmallows and tell ghost stories again."

"Plus you'd get to spend the summer with me. It would be our last hurrah before I leave for New York in the fall."

Finn looked over at Kurt and asked, "You really think I'd be good at being a counselor?"

"Finn – I've watched you lead the glee club for three years now. Do you always make the best decisions? No. But you always try to fix things whenever you make a mistake and to me that's a leader. You're a natural born leader."

Finn shot Kurt a goofy grin. "Thanks, Kurt. It would be fun to go back to camp."

Kurt tapped the brochure in his hand. "Just think about it. I think it will do you some good to get away from Lima for awhile."