shorter. I'm just headed back into work in a day and just needed to get out what I could before I had less free time again. I want to apologize for tense changes in the last two chapters, I did edit and update. I just took something I found in my computer and expounded it on it from other things I had sitting on my computer, combining them and then also adding new stuff so it was truly all over the place. Hopefully the updated chapters are up and read better.
IntrovertedxxMusings- bless your heart. I write original fiction and I've been so uninspired but I watched some interviews and hopped on my Bonnie Bennett deserved so much better wagon again and needed to write. Figured fanfiction would help. Thank you so much for your kind words.
teambonbon972- I hope I can keep you interested, I'm obviously sort of following the television show here but I'm writing what I believe realistically Bonnie would of experienced, some detachment from her original life in order to embrace the world as she truly knows it. Makes more sense than her just you know, going with the flow.
Anyway, thanks for reading everybody. I'm tryna get back into my writer bag and as of late Bonnie Bennett has been at the forefront of my mind. That and I'm tired of all these television shows and films so focused on Black people suffering when we're already suffering enough irl. Felt a strong desire to not only flex my fingers again but to explore the stories I'm more interested in seeing. So, here's to the Black girl that gets sidelined as the best-friend or rival though she could have a more interesting storyline in movies, TV and books. word count: 3, 652
x.x.x
3.
She almost chokes on the alcohol. Grimacing after two big sips. It warms her throat and belly but the taste of it lingers. Damon snickers, pouring himself a healthy glass of the liquor and drinking it easily, like its juice. She's seated on the arm of a chair, clutching her glass tightly in her hand, swirling the remainder of the liquor around, watching it. This feels unnatural.
She realizes too, that she is in his home alone with him. She has walked into the lion's den. Is this a trap? Is this how he kills her too.
"Penny for your thoughts." Damon keeps his distance, standing over at the fireplace, leaning onto the mantel. "I can smell your hair burning." He says turning to look at her. He smiles at the glare she fixes him with. Those earthy green eyes could burn a hole right through him with the malice that sits there.
She considers burning his hair. Imagines the smell of his hair products perfuming the air around them. The satisfaction it would give her. "I feel like I should reiterate that I don't trust you."
"Say it until you're blue in the face. Really." Damon struts around to the couch, sitting in the corner opposite of where she is perched. He leans back into the cushion, twists his body so he's facing her, one arm resting on the the back of it.
"You almost killed me." She says softly then, she does something that surprises him, she laughs softly, humorlessly. She lifts her glass to her lips again, taking another sip. This time she manages not to grimace. He watches her for a while and finds himself feeling-well he isn't sure what he's feeling just that he is feeling something. He sees something of himself there. Something that reminds him of the space of time between his transition and the moment he began to get acclimated with it. The way he was fundamentally changed in a short span of time. And though it was over a hundred years ago, time was a splash in the pan for a vampire and so it dug up for him that feeling.
Bonnie Bennett seems to be in a state of transition herself. She too, was fundamentally different from the girl he had intimidated in a parking lot less than a month ago. She was shifting in her skin and right before his eyes. When he's silent too long she looks at him, finds his blue eyes on her already.
"Nothing to say?" She asks him and she snorts into her glass. "That's a first."
"I did almost kill you." She prompted this conversation but hearing him say it so casually pisses her off all over again. How could she be in this room with him? All alone. Not even afraid that he'd simply used the threat of the council coming after her to lure her here to finish the job. He thinks of her thinly veiled threat, of that desire burning her up for revenge. He takes a sip of his drink too, glancing away from her for a moment. "What are you going to do about it?"
Is he challenging her? She wonders or is he just curious. She doesn't say anything and when her silence prompts him to look at her, glacier blue meeting green and she just holds his gaze there.
That's how Elena and Stefan find them. Sitting in the parlor with a fire burning, silently staring at one another.
Elena's soft, "Oh" is what stirs Bonnie away from that moment. Damon tears his eyes away from her, twisting in his seat and lifting his glass in a salute to Stefan.
"The prodigal son returns." Bitterness lances his words. Bonnie stands abruptly, leaving her glass on the coffee table. Damon sees it, "This is a coaster house." She ignores him, grabbing her bag from where she set it on the floor.
"What's going on?" Stefan asks, mostly Damon seeing as he has been trying to give Bonnie a wide berth. He was disappointed in his behavior and he could tell that the witch was wary around him. Though, it made her presence in his house sharing a drink with Damon all the more suspicious.
"Just two friends having a drink." Damon grins at his brother, tipping his head back to finish off the last of what is in his glass. "Right, Bon."
"Don't get familiar." She says cutting her eyes at him, arms folded over her chest. "We're not friends."
And Elena can't help herself, her eyes moving wildly from Bonnie to Damon to the glass on the coffee table. "Are we?" Stefan's arm comes up behind her, a reassuring pressure between her shoulder blades. "Bonnie, can we talk. Please."
Bonnie worries her bottom lip between her teeth, staring down at Elena's boots instead of her face, not ready to see the hurt there. A stark contrast at how easy she finds it to meet Damon's gaze. Something akin to guilt settles in between her whittled ribs. The way Elena's voice croaks. She supposes, this is as good as any time, as she thinks of Caroline's request. Bonnie looks up then, nodding once.
"Damon," Stefan frowns, anger lancing his own expression. "You and I should talk, too." Stefan gives Elena's back a reassuring pat before he starts, not waiting for Damon to follow, toward the kitchen.
The privacy is a feigned comfort, considering both girls are aware that Damon and Stefan can listen in no problem from any room in this house but they both wait until the kitchen door shuts firmly behind them to speak.
Elena fiddles for a moment with the strap of her bag, watching Bonnie, the way she stands with one hip jutted out, arms crossed tightly over her chest. She waits too, for the moment Bonnie finally looks up at her face.
"What's going on?" Elena asks her. She knows it's not the best question but it feels like the right one to ask when Bonnie told her not even a week ago that she needed to not be around the Salvatores. That her words hadn't been on a loop in her mind, "I'm not going to make you choose, Elena but I am making a choice for myself."
"You-" Elena starts then she pauses trying to choose her words carefully. Remind herself this is her grieving friend. "One moment you're telling me you don't want to be around them and so you choose to not be around me. And then you're here drinking with Damon." Elena exhales loudly, running a frustrated hand through her hair. "I-I don't get it."
"Elena…" Bonnie starts and then stops. "I'm not here because I want to be. I'm here because i have to be."
Elena's brow wrinkles and she steps forward, reaching for Bonnie but then thinking better of it. "Did he threaten you?" She whispers, her eyes darting to the kitchen. "Did he hurt you again?" And she is fierce, the anger that lights her brown eyes tugs at Bonnie's heart. Bonnie reaches out this time, resting her hand on her friends wrist and stopping her from rushing into the kitchen.
"No-nothing like that." Bonnie reassures her. "The council." She says. "I could be in just as much trouble as they are." She says softly, jerking her head in the direction of the kitchen. And her mind goes to Damon's words. You're more like me than them. She looks at her hand on Elena's wrist and let's her go.
"Oh." Elena tucks her hair behind her ear. "I-I didn't even consider that the council would come after you." Elena reaches out then, doesn't stop herself, grips Bonnie's shoulders, bending to look her in the eye. "Are you okay?"
Bonnie nibbles on her bottom lip again, her voice cracking. She's missed her so much. Her gentle friend. Her attentive friend. "As okay as anyone can be with their world turned upside down."
Elena immediately tugs her into her closer, tucks her friend's head into the crook of her neck and holds her tightly. The dam breaks then, Bonnie can't help the tears that fall as she wraps her arms around Elena too. They separate and Bonnie rubs furiously at the tears that have fallen. It's not that the display in front of Elena is new. It's that she doesn't want to be crying in the Salvatore boarding house. She doesn't want that vulnerability here.
"I'm so sorry if you felt like you couldn't talk to me." Elena tells her. Her own eyes glassy, tears threatening to spill over. "I'm here for you. Always."
"I'm sorry too." Bonnie tells her. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad but-"
"You don't have to explain." Elena stops her. "I understand."
They stand there silent for a moment, happy to be reunited but something still knicks at Bonnie and instead of doing what she usually does, burying it deep, she speaks up. "Nothings changed." She says. "Nothing has changed about how I feel about them."
Elena nods mute, she still has questions. Still needs to know how she ended up having a drink with Damon. How point a led to point b, but it's not important right now. "I get that."
Bonnie eyes her warily, "I really need you to."
X.x.x.
"What are you doing?" Stefan doesn't wait, the moment the door is shut behind Damon he spins and regards him suspiciously. Angrily. Bonnie had been through enough with him. But it was Damon and he can't leave well enough alone.
Damon waves him off, leaning against the island counter and gesturing for Stefan to continue.
"What are you doing?" Stefan repeats.
Damon smirks, enjoying how shaken, how angry his brother is by him dallying with the little witch. He wonders where his mind is going? What does he think is going on? Was happening or going to happen before he and Elena rudely interrupted. When he doesn't answer, instead staring at Stefan with this sick, silly smirk, he watches as his brother grows angrier.
"Whatever it is. Stop it."
"Oh, come up off it, Stefan." Damon says, now tired of this discipline. Tired of Stefan and Elena trying to fix him. Turn him into one of the good guys. Tired of the lectures. Tired of puffy-eyed, You-can-do-better-BE-better. "Stop trying to be the better person. It's lame, it's tired, it's out of style."
"Damon, you can leave her out of all of this. You put her in this and now her grandmother is gone. So you come up off it. Hey- weren't you supposed to leave?"
"It's amazing to me, Brother." Damon laughs but it's devoid of humor. His gaze hard and unforgiving on his younger brother's face. "That you think you're so different. So much better than I am." That takes Stefan aback, screws up his face as he glances away. "Which one of us did the witch have to put a muzzle on recently?"
Stefan remains silent.
"Nothing to say for yourself, little bro? Nothing to add? Ah- wait. You hear that?"
Nothing has changed about how I feel about them.
Damon approaches Stefan then, adjusting the collar of his younger brother's shirt, "Stop trying to make me out to be a bigger monster than you to assuage guilt. There's a ripper in this room and between you and me-" He leans in toward his ear to whisper, "It isn't me." Then he pats him on his chest. Damon moves away from him, lingering at his shoulder, facing the opposite direction as Stefan's eyes lower, shame and anger brewing beneath his surface.
Damon knows it's a low blow but he never ever aspired to be the bigger person once in his life. And frankly he is tired of his little brother's holier than thou gospel tour. It is true that he might be different now, gentler, more focused on being human than being monster but it was also true that this hadn't always been who he was and the evening of the Founders Ball was enough to remind him of that. Or it should have been. His cooling off in a locked cell for a few days should have been enough. His time with just his mind, his guilt and the way it racked him to the point that he almost gave up his ring and walked out into the sunlight should have been enough.
Stefan could use a little humbling. A reminder that someone in this town knew him in all his totality and not just what he decided he would be today. Someone here knew him beyond his hero hair and brooding forehead. Someone here knew that he had at one time killed with no abandon, that he terrorized towns and murdered villages.
"Does Elena know?" Damon wonders out loud. "Would probably change a few things if she found out."
Then Damon's leaving, stepping back into the parlor. To his surprise Bonnie is still there, she and Elena whispering on the couch. They both look up when he walks in, silent as if he hasn't heard every single word they've said. He can't help it. He fixes himself another drink, lifts his eyes to Bonnie's empty glass still on the table. Then to her.
"Want another Bennett?"
"No," She tells him standing. "But I'll take the Gilbert device."
"Like hell you will." He says.
"She's going to remove the spell on it. Elena reassures him.
"This ain't no parlor trick." Damon's eyes are on Bonnie again. "Do you think you can do it?"
She lifts one brow, "I know I can and I know I'm not about to prove myself to you. You recruited me because you needed me."
"You need me too, Tituba." He smiles then. "Don't forget that part."
"Damon." Elena says, cautioning him.
"I don't have time for this, Damon. Give me the device. I'll do it now and you can hand it over to them in the morning. We can wash our hands of this. And I can wash my hands of you."
He smacks his lips and thinks better of continuing to play with her. He is on thin ice with her as it is. Stefan enters then a shadow passing over his face as he passes by his brother to sink into the couch with Elena. She folds into him easily, worry creasing her face as he promises he's fine. The younger Salvatore looks up then, a grim expression on his face as he eyes his brother, watching him pull the device from his pocket.
Bonnie accepts it careful to keep her hand from brushing his as she examines it. She kneels, setting the device on the coffee table carefully as she fishes her grimoire out of her bag. The room is tense as they watch her, silent for the sake of her concentration.
She finds the page she's looking for, skims it thoughtfully for a moment before she rubs her hands together, holding them palms open over the device. Closing her eyes, she begins to speak softly, latin falling from her lips quickly. The flames of the fireplace leapt upward quickly before going back to normal.
She slowly opens her eyes, grabbing the device she holds it up in the air for Damon to take. "Done."
He walks over taking the device from her, eyeing it as he moves the weight of it around in his hand. He looks at her, "That's it?"
"Damon." Elena says again, cautioning him.
"Good boys say thank you." Damon tells Elena, his gaze shifting to Stefan, a warning clear on his face. "I'm not a good boy."
X.x.x
Stefan Salvatore is a bleeding heart with a bloody past. One he had spent the better half of the last sixty years of his long life trying to correct and undo. By how did one atone for the sins for their past. He couldn't simply walk into a church and confess. Though he had tried once or twice when he had traveled back to Italy, exploring where his family had once called home before they had made their way to America.
Could one atone for their sins? Christianity said yes but he was not religious. Had been for the first half of his life but then he had met the devil in the form of a beatific, charming woman, Katherine Pierce. All thoughts of what was holy left him then, in so many different ways. She introduced him to the carnal pleasures in life, opened the door wide and he walked right in and made himself at home.
Or was he to spend the rest of his days carrying around that heavy bag, the weight of all he had done and all of whom he had hurt, harmed and killed? Could he ever be a new person? Could he be the person he is today? Or was he only ever going to be the ripper, the savage, selfish, bloodthirsty vampire?
And could Elena Gilbert love him like that?
He could barely love himself like that.
X.x.x.
Caroline finds them at Bonnie's locker together. She pauses in the hallway, regards them carefully, attempting to read body language to gauge whether or not she should approach. When Bonnie smiles, bright with teeth gleaming at Elena, Caroline feels her own face light up and she happily skips over.
"Oh, thank god." She says, pulling her arms around both of their necks and hugging them to her. "You two made up." Then she stills suddenly, loosening her grip on the other two girls, her hands going to her face as she looks at both of them. "Please tell me I didn't read that wrong. You did make up, right?"
It would be so awkward if they hadn't.
Elena laughs, wrapping her arm back around Caroline's waist and pulling her back to her. "Yes, Care. Mostly thanks to your meddling."
"Oh, good!" She's relieved. "My super power has yet to fail me."
Bonnie laughs then too, happy to have both of her friends, though she and Elena have a quiet understanding. She still doesn't want to spend too much time around either Salvatore. Her gut tells her that even without the overwhelming evidence, she feels she should keep them at arms length. A safe enough distance that she can keep an eyes on them but also protect herself.
Though she admires Elena, for her ability to bounce back from every wrench life has thrown at her. She fears that her friend can be too generous with herself and too trusting of others. Which were okay when they were talking about how easily the three girls bonded. How the moment they met, Elena just knew they were the greatest friends she'd ever have and she told them that on that first day of kindergarten. Bonnie had been skeptical, staring at the other girl quizzically. Thinking of how her grandmother told her to feel around strangers. And that's what this girl was a stranger. But she knew, from the moment she sat down next to her and said, "I'm Lena." thrusting her hand into the air between them like she meant business. That they were in this for life.
Bonnie's just never been that way. Call it grooming from knowing what it was like to be left at a very young age. She never found herself getting too comfortable with anyone. They were all bound to leave or disappoint eventually. And because she always knew deep down that it would happen she was always shielded from the emotion you would have to unpack when it inevitably happened. And in the darkest part of her she was preparing to comfort Elena the very moment she saw Stefan and Damon for what they were.
Complicated problems not worth having.
"We'll since we're all friends again." Caroline says. "Thanks to me." Literally patting herself on the back, Bonnie and Elena can't help but laugh at that. "We should probably talk about what we're all wearing to Founder's Day. Which means free up some time, we're going closet diving." She then turns to Elena. "I love you honey so I'm saying this as a true friend, it really wouldn't kill you to switch it up a bit."
Elena shoves her arm playfully, "Fine." Elena relents, rolling her eyes. She has been in a uniform of Henley and jeans. Having lost somewhat of a hold on the preppy cheerleader she had been. After her parents died and then after finding out vampires and witches are real, it just felt like so many other things weren't important. Getting dressed up to go to a school every single day was a hassle and a waste of time she really felt like she didn't have. "How about you both come over before the festivities?"
"Sounds good." Bonnie says.
"Okay but I'm bringing my kit." Caroline says, eyeing both girls warily. "You both need to step it up if you're going to be seen with me."
Elena's still laughing, smiling brightly and happy to have her girls back completely. "I should go. I promised Aunt Jenna I'd be home so we can prep for our intervention with Jer."
Bonnie grimaces, "Yeahhhh, good luck with that."
Elena is off then, promising to see them tomorrow before the Founders Day event. And they watch her as she walks off, Caroline waiting until she's sure the girl is out of earshot before she turns on Bonnie.
"So, are you ever going to tell me what happened?" She asks. She can respect a boundary if need be but she's nosey too and now that Elena and Bonnie have effectively made up, their trio intact. It feels only right that now be the time that one of them fesses up, take her out of the dark.
Bonnie sighs, linking her arm through Caroline's as they head toward the door. "It's complicated, Care."
So, so, so complicated.