As I was going through the book, there was a knock on the door. I took the book with me, glasses still on, which I didn't really need, and opened the door, which revealed Rafe's unusually sad face.

"What happened to you?" I asked, concerned. "You look like you got hit by a truck."

He walked in, and crashed on the burgundy chair.

"Claire Olivia and I had a big fight… I think we're done." Perfect. Lie or not, he sounded sincere, and I thought that he looked like his plan blew up in his face.

"Oh, man." I said, grabbing some Fantat and vodka. "That really sucks." I took the job of bartender, and handed him a plastic screwdriver.

"It'll cure what ails you." I said, using a medieval English accent. His mood instantly improved, but only a bit.

"What happened?" I asked, lying down on my bed.

"She didn't like who I was becoming." He answered. "A jock, she said. I told her that I played touch football, and she just flipped out, telling me this wasn't the Rafe that she wanted."

He looked down at his drink, and gulped a large mouthful. "I just wish that I could be myself, without, you know."

I replied after a few nods. "Cindy used to do that all the time, she had to decide what I am, and what I am not. It drove me nuts. We're not supposed to change, and if we do, they aren't there to witness it. It's this major affront." I sighed. This wasn't even a half lie. Cindy hated that I went to Natick. She hated that I wasn't her farmer boy anymore.

"That's what I mean." Rafe said.

"So, is it really over?" Is the lie over?

He shrugged, and said: "She hung up on me, so probably."

"Well, you know, the way your parents described her, she doesn't sound like someone you would date." I blurted out. Maybe this wasn't the best thing to say.

"Maybe. It still sucks." Thank God. He then looked at me, and began to think about his next words.

"I know. That connection. It's hard to replace." I thought about Cindy and Bryce. Bryce was my replacement for the loss of Cindy. And now Rafe was my replacement for Bryce. I wonder if we could still be this if I told him the truth. He continued to look at me, and I looked back, a silent staring contest as he attempts to look into my mind.

"Yeah, I feel in a lot of ways closer to you than I ever did to Claire Olivia."

WAIT, WHAT? My cheeks began to grew flushed and I smiled a little bit, as I attempted to hide my excitement.

"Yeah, that's not the kind of thing people talk about much. I guess I can say that I love you, bro."

He chuckled, and said back: "I love you too, bro."

We made a fist bump, and he collapsed down to my bed, both of us laughing. We shared the time together. I wrapped his waist with my arms. It felt so right. I could explode in happiness. Hope he doesn't feel the warmth. We laid there, not saying anything.

"Men in India…" I began to speak, "Hold hands walking down the street." I sheepishly continued. This wasn't going to work. I needed to tell him, but I couldn't risk the guys in the baseball team knowing. Screw it! A part of me said. But I continued on. "It's part of their culture. They don't, you know, do things sexually. They just hold hands."

"We Americans are so uptight, why do we have to make everything such a huge deal? Why must we label everything?" he complained to me. It was true, and the more he told me about it, the more it made sense. He didn't want to be recognized as Toby 2.0. And maybe, I could just tell him he wouldn't be. But it wouldn't make sense to tell that now.

We went back to our silent gaze. My heart was pounding, and so was his. I silently swallowed some saliva. The tension, it felt so palpable, you could cut it with a knife. This was love. I am in love with Rafe, just like when I was with Bryce, and I was in love with those two a lore more than I was with Cindy. Just tell him! I said to myself. I began to blush. After a few moments, he turned to me.

"Thanks Ben." he said. "You may be the best friend I've ever had."

I love "you too."

Two months later

As the month followed with time, and as fall began to roll in, Rafe began to integrate with Bryce's bed. We shared laughs, tears, thoughts, knowledge. We'd often sit together and talk until three or four in the morning. These nights were my favorite. And I'd often fantasized about a life with him. Sweet, sweet Rafe. Just tell me you're gay already.

"What do you want? I asked. "In the future, if you could come up with a perfect scenario for what your life would be, what would it be?"

"You first." He deflected.

You and me, of course. Us. "Maybe a house in Maine or Vermont. Somewhere with fewer people because people aren't my favorite. Present company excluded. A black lab who likes to take long walks, and a wife," A husband. "who likes to talk with me, make jokes but also be serious, you know?" TAKE. THE. HINT.

"You're so hip-hop" he laughed.

"I know." I replied, following with a smile.

"What about you?"

"Pretty much the same."

"Well, it's nice dreaming about all this stuff. Makes me feel peaceful." I sighed, peacefully. "So, can I tell you something?"

"Yeah?"

"When I had sex with Cindy, it was like, I dunno, there's naked and there's naked, you know?"

"Not sure I follow?" Rafe replied, tilting his head in confusion.

I explained my weird feeling to him. And I continued to hide my bisexuality. I told him about my vulnerability.

"That's beautiful." He said to my confession.

"I guess it didn't happen to you, right?"

He replied with a feeling that made him feel like a different person. Not like imposter syndrome, but taking his word, he told me about feeling like a different person. I felt like a different person with him.

"But like, how did you feel?" The conversation began to go nowhere. I had to tell him. I HAD TO. Now or never.

"I felt closer to her, I guess? Like connected? Spiritually connected." I didn't listen much to what he said later, as I was gathering my own thoughts. Say it. I thought to myself. And so, the veil was beginning to lift itself.

Rafe, I think I'm bi.

I continued on, listening to him spilling out his thoughts. The day moved on after that, and I've regretted not saying it since.

Another few weeks later, and it was nearing Thanksgiving. I had received an e-mail that I'd be expecting the Tollesons to come over. The Tollesons had been close to our family, and I was a friend of the kid, Mitch Tolleson. But as he grew up, he got into hunting, and became a god-damn redneck. I told this to Rafe, and then, I got a huge surprise.

"Well, you won't be dining with him, what with you being in Boulder and all that." He looked at me, expecting a reaction. And a reaction he did get. I produced a stupid goofy smile, and probably looked like someone who had gotten an acceptance letter to Harvard.

"You serious?!" I said.

"Of course. It's all done, you're coming with me."

My heart froze, melted, and jumped across my chest. This is perfect! I thought to myself.

"My parents bought you a ticket. I was supposed to be a surprise."

"I-I can't accept that."

"Yeah, you can." He said, smiling at me. "You're my friend." Boyfriend. "They want you there. I want you there, Benny."

I hugged him with all the might of my large body, almost crushing him. Me, him, the Mr. and Mrs. This could work.

The day later, Rafe had a terrible game in baseball, ending the season horribly. The group was dangerously sullen throughout Donnelly's last pep talk. In the shower, we were even more sullen.

"Nice season, Ben, nice season, Zack." Steve said to us. It was nice that I wasn't on Steve's back. But I wished that I had done something when he targeted Bryce. After a few seconds, Robinson spoke out.

"I'm sorry. I know I sucked."

"Yeah, well," Steve shouted, "Being sorry won't get us to next round." He raised his voice further: "Maybe if you weren't out getting your cock sucked by Toby twenty-four seven, this wouldn't have happened."

The shower room got quiet. The veil was off. I looked at Rafe, who was right besides me.

"Shut up." Robinson said.

Zack quickly took over, bringing out slurs and threw the veil into the fire. They knew about Robinson and Toby's 'adventure' into the woods behind the school, and Robinson just stood there and took it.

Stand up for yourself! I thought. And maybe Rafe was thinking the same, because he stepped in, surprising everyone.

"Hey." He said, "cut it out."

"Oh, it's the guy who can't handle making a wide-open pass." Zack pushed back. "You should really be talking right now, huh."

Anger began to brew in me. Even with a body like mine, no one would really expect me to participate. Especially since I never did. Zack and Rafe began to tense up, their stand off causing the tension throughout the shower room to burst. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Shut the fuck up. You don't talk like that about our teammate. And don't talk like that about my friend Toby." Rafe said, angrily. My heart began to flutter. Rafe, what a hero you are!

"Your friend, Toby, he sucking your cock too, Colorado?" Zack laughed. He began to step out of the shower. That was when I stepped in.

"If you say another word, I'm gonna blast that head of yours into that wall."

Zack froze, staring at me with his laughter extinguished. I was the biggest guy in the room. Not even Steve could compare. And they're small tinge of fear showed it. Everyone went back to showering, and my feelings towards had Rafe only began to show itself, little by little, with the beginning coming from this very incident. The warm pellets of water made me relax, back to the old, quiet, nerd Ben instead of the Spartan Ben.

I finished up with a small remark: "Cut out the homophobic crap. Seriously, grow up."

"He's right." Steve came back in, hypocrite as always, "let's put that stuff away."

Everyone knew he started it, but we were already too tired to continue, so I, and everyone else returned to enjoying the warm, or cold feeling of shower water dropping on our bodies.

The Veil is lifting.