An Incorrect Summary of RWBY Vol. 2

RWBY Vol. 2 is the sequel to RWBY Vol. 1 and why am I telling you this? You should have already read the first part. Vol. 2 is known to be bigger, longer, and more unfocused in its plot. I don't know what fan reaction is because that would mean actually interacting with the RWBY fandom and that's smelly. So, sit watch back and enjoy.

We begin with Emerald and Mercury. Enjoy them because they aren't always around. But, in other news, we actually have background characters.

"Hey, Emerald, why the fuck are we here again?"

"To advance the plot. Also who told you could swear?"

"Since now, bitch.'

Emerald steals an old man's wallet and goes to a bookshop to find one of NPCs from Dream Daddy. Emerald gets the man to answer some personal questions before telling him that he just won a contest. The NPC reveals himself to be a Furry Bara Daddy and also read the last part. Mercury awards the man with a boot to the head, killing him instantly.

We go back to Beacon where there was a time skip, I guess. Ruby plans to make their last day of break one of the best. Weiss accuses Ruby of theft, but Ruby denies it, saying that it's not illegal if the president does it. This causes Yang to utter a line so bad it counted as a declaration of war.

We then begin the food fight, one of the best fights in the series. Seriously, just go online and watch it. This is a threat. We also return to Sun and new character Neptune. Enjoy him while he lasts because he won't always be around. Anyway, they enter trench warfare as a witch ends the Food Wars.

"Ozpin, should we really let these kids goof off without any sense of plot?"

"Fuck, it ain't my problem. Also clean this up because I'm going to drink coffee and not do anything."

"God damn it."

We cut back to the villains as they plan to do stuff. Roman bullies children over taking down a book trader before Cinder, wielder of the Google Chrome, tells him off. Roman reminds everyone that he still remembers the plot of last volume and asks what's all the sponsorships for. Cinder just doesn't answer. Okay.

The next episode brings in Ironwood, who brought to plot to Beacon because he was tired of Ozpin sitting on his ass.

"Jimmy John, why are you bringing plot to my high school anime?"

"Hey, Ozpin. Maybe you should look outside to the world and see the actual plot that's happening and not trying to manipulate your students' love lives. "

"I will have so many ships I can build a fucking navy and you can't stop me."

The two argue about plot, but this is turning into a Reddit comment thread, so I'm just going to transition smoothly.

We go to a library, the most high school of places. Some basic things happen, like how everyone is okay with Blake being the weeb gamer except Weiss. Sun shows up and introduces Neptune, who immediately goes after the one with money. Jaune is upset that the twink is stealing the rich girl, but one can only ignore no until the restraining order gets made. Sun tries talking to Blake but she disconnects from the call.

Later, Blake gets the rest of team RWBY and make plans to move the plot. Blake thinks that an Under-aged Goth, an Instagram White Girl, a Weeabo Gamer, and an actual criminal are going to stop a criminal organization. And so they make a blood pact using ketchup because this is a kids show, I think.

Later, Ruby meets with the villains, who aren't actually the villains because they disguise themselves as teenagers.

"Hi, I'm-"

"This world is imperfect."

"Um, what-?"

"If only this world was as beautiful as me."

"Is this a fuckin ProZD reference?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, my name is Cinder and we're just transfer students. Not anyone evil."

"Well, I'm Ruby and don't worry. About half of the student body has some kind of criminal record."

"When I'm done with this school, there won't be no body left."

"Is she-?"

"No, she's just like this."

Ruby leaves and the episode ends.

The next episode begins with Jaune continuing to contribute by the lack of plot by adding in a romance sub-plot. However, I don't care as much as the show does, so I'm not going to talk about it.

We go over to the next scene and we have new designs for the protagonists. Enjoy them while it lasts because they're never going to show up again after this volume. They decide to split into three teams because Sun and Neptune are also there. Weiss will go to the Viacom Tower and, I don't know, get files or something. Ruby goes with her because no one wanted to deal with her. Yang is bringing the Twink to the bar in order to engage in under-age drinking and also get information, maybe. At the same time, the two furries will infiltrate the gamer's discord call and raid the chat with memes.

We then shift to Weiss and Ruby. While Ruby stands outside like a child who has to wait for their mom to finish talking with her friend for four days, Weiss goes into the Viacom Tower.

"Hello, we don't recognize this device. Could you enter the correct credentials?"

"God damn it, this always happens."

"Hello, and welcome to the Google Drive. What would you want?"

"I'm going to need those sponsorship deals and where they're going?"

"That is illegal, you know."

"I'll pay you a 100 bucks to fuck off and never talk to me again."

"Deal. Also, you want to talk to your family?"

"No, just-"

"Because your father's on his private yacht, your mother is on her fifth crate of wine today, Winter's available, and you didn't block Whitely like you said you would."

"No, don't call anyone. Especially my siblings, who I definitely don't have until next season."

At the same time, Ruby reunites with Penny, howerver she is acting sus odd and won't reach out to non-government mandated subscriber. Penny takes Ruby to somewhere else where there is also Steam Sale for UltraKill and other assorted Boomer shooters. However, the bots leading this notice Penny and give chase to the two girls. This goes on for like a minute until Penny gets hit by a truck. Instead of an Isekai, she just lives and is revealed to be a robot.

"You see, Ruby, I was built to be the ultimate influencer. And there was something about the plot, but I spaced out halfway through."

"Holy shit! My friend's a robot! I always wanted one!"

"Do you acknowledge I have real feelings too?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever?"

We then cut to Yang and the Twink as they go the same bar as in the Yellow Trailer.

"What's up, bitches!"

"Oh God, she's here!"

"Hey, Junior, old buddy, old pal, do me a solid and your insurance won't go up."

"Whatever. Just promise you'll leave without ruining my business."

"No promises."

And so Yang intimidates an honest businessman into where the smooth criminal is located. Junior truthfully says he knows the Menace leaves while also rescuing Neptune from being Ara, Ara'd by twins.

We cut again to Blake and Sun as they infiltrated the Discord Server.

"Alright everyone, remember the rules and we won't have to ban you. And by ban, I mean kill."

"Hey, who let the Redditor in?!"

"Okay, one: I don't use Reddit, anymore. And second, I'm here to help you. Are you tired of corporations taking your hard-earned earnings through their bullshit copyright system? Well, these lovely people built something to gain even more money through content creators. But, we took it instead.

Neo drops the curtain to reveal a giant mech suit.

"Behold! The suit. Now, you and other content creators can make money straight through your fans! No more middle man! No more demontization! And so, no more corporations!"

"Sun, this is bad. We need to save those good-to-honest monopolies."

"Uh, Blake, I think we might have some trouble with that."

Unfortunately, Sun's K-Pop status alerts the hordes of stans and they flee with the after them.

This transitions into one of the best fights of the volume, as Yang and Twink dodge cars and tier rewards from the Pateron bot. The fight then spills out of the highway and go under a highway. There, all four girls duel with the Pateron robot using the power of ships. Eventually, the toxic culture overwhelms the Pateron and it dies. Roman survives and escapes with his Rule 63 counterpart, no seriously that's what Neo's based off of. Look it up.

"Well, gang, we did it. We stopped Pateron, defeated the gamers, and tied up all the loose ends."

"Ruby, this is episode 4. Out of twelve."

"Uuuggghhh…"

"I wonder what Sun's doing?"

Meanwhile…

"And after tonight, I think I don't like girls now."

"Wow Neptune, that's great and all. I'm happy you finally came to terms with yourself."

"Yeah, you think that white-haired femboy is available?"

"What?"

Are you ready for more romance, because I sure don't. The main conflict now is that Pyrrha wants Jaune, but Jaune wants Weiss and Weiss wants Neptune and Neptune has the charisma of a dried salmon. What I'm trying to say is, Ozpin is the true villain because we have watch him develop the shipping community. Also there's some dance, and Sasuke Uchiha fights Magneto Wonder Woman and quits.

Blake is currently trying to find the plot and this affects her daily life because the animators made a whole new model made for sleep-deprived Blake. We continue to suffer through more romantic drama as Pyrrha tells Jaune that no one asked her to the dance and it would be a real shame if both of them ended up dateless to the prom. I would say this is unrealistic, but have you ever encountered a woman? It's like trying to crack Navajo Radio codes. Also, Cinder continues to monologue villainously.

"Concerned" for her friend, Yang makes Blake meet with her privately.

"Yang, why do we need to meet here again? And what the fuck was the laser pointer for? You could have asked without resorting to stereotypes."

"Yeah, but you're the one who fell for it."

"Fair."

"Listen, Blake, you need to stop trying to find the plot and go to the stupid dance."

"But I can't! It has to be my responsibility!"

"Never use that word in front of me ever again. Anyway, let me tell you about the last time I tried to find the plot."

We then have a flashback of Yang explaining how she took Ruby to find her mom at the local Walmart. Instead, she got lost and met the wolf pack from the Jungle Book. Not wanting to join the pack, she is instead saved by Qrow. Who's Qrow? Well…

"-And that's how I got my first night in prison."

"Yang, that didn't make any fucking sense."

"Well, the point is that to peruse the plot is only going to drag down the story."

"So what, do you want me to stop?"

"No, make it a sub-plot. There you can both develop the plot and not let it consume you."

"Thanks, Yang. I needed that. You're a good friend."

"Yeah, and a good friend who would let you bring that BTS back-up dancer to the prom instead of your teammate who's secretly in love with you."

"Wow, I never thought about it that way. You are totally cool and hot and your sense of humor is great…"

In the Ballroom

"And you had sex at least once."

"Yang, was any of what you said true?"

"Absolutely, Ice Ice Baby. Don't ask Blake, she's sleeping."

Meanwhile, more of Jaune's bullshit as he tries to get the Tsundere. Pyrrha gives Jaune to okay to ask Weiss, making Pyrrha the biggest cuck on the planet. The other two the show doesn't care about yet tell Pyrrha that her and Jaune are fucking dumbasses and need to just get together already. It's easier said than done because the Virgin Jaune got cucked by the Chad Twink Neptune. Will Jaune recover? The answer is yes.

Anyway, the dance is happening. Jaune tries to get Neptune from stop being an ultra-Chad, but Neptune is not. Instead, he and Weiss are in a bit of a pickle.

"You didn't go out with her because you're gay?"

"Well, it's not that. It's just I thought Weiss was a boy with long hair and a dress and stupid rich."

"That's so dumb. You can still go as friends, even if you two are the opposite sex!"

"Wait, Weiss is a girl?"

"Yes, you blueberry bastard!"

After this, Jaune finally gets the stones to ask Pyrrha and she says yes. And so, we learn that if there's one thing animators like more than fight scenes, it's dance scenes. Because this one is really good. Also, Jaune's arms are so fucking toned in that dress model, like holy shit.

Meanwhile, Cinder infiltrates the Viacom Tower after jumping like she was an early PS1 cut-scene. Ruby ditches the dance because who needs social events when you have a gun? Ruby finds nothing except an MS Paint background.

After talking to the police, the heroes accomplish nothing except looking more incompetent.

"Ozpin, that's why we needed to bring the plot! Someone who has the same artistic qualities as Ringo Starr has already initiated it!"

"James, you and your 'plot' are ruining my high-school shipping. So, if you want to keep pushing the plot forward, then shut the fuck up, or I'll get Funimation to cancel your dub."

We cut back to team RWBY as they unlock the dog. Turns out Ruby and Yang's dad got him in a loot box or something. Now added as the mascot of the team, Zwei is one of the best characters in the show because he can't talk.

Now, all the teams are being assigned missions just like Naruto.

"Hey, isn't that the rabbit from last season?"

"Yah, mate. Also I'm Australian or whatever."

"That's cool. I'm Ruby and these are my friends."

"That' neato. These are my friends: Fighter, Crazy-Ass, and Lesbian."

"Fuck off, Velvet."

"Cool, so are we going to explore their personalities?"

"Nah."

And so team CFVY just leave. We learn that meth-addict, Oobleck is going along with four teenage girls. This isn't going to be good for him.

The team arrives in the desolate ruins of MySpace, where the remnants of the friendship leaderboard still wander around.

"Wait, that's what we're calling the elephants?"

"Shut mouth, White Girl! Basically, we need to pillage MySpace so we can improve Twitter or something! I don't fucking care how you do it, just as long as I am still high by the end of this!"

"How is this related to the plot?"

"No time for questions, Cat Girl! Find me the 320 km/mph of meth before -! Holy shit, is that a dog?!"

"Uh, no?'

"Rubert, you're either a maniac of a fucking genius."

"Um, thanks and that's not my name."

"Too bad! Fight go now!"

And so everyone fights off a cluster of furries. Why they are still in MySpace? I don't know. Night falls, and Ruby is the first to be sent on late-night scrolling with her dog.

"Alright children, since the main character is gone, you best explain your motivations since this is the only time we get to do it all together. White one, you go first"

"Well, I want to gain control of my family's company and make it better. Also to spite my dad."

"I want to stop the oppression of my people through better means than violence for violence's sake."

"Damn, you two have actual motivations. I just wanted to punch people."

"An excellent sentiment, Blond Boob one. Now, the narrator should go check on Red."

So we switch to Ruby because I wanted to, not because you asked me to, Dad. Anyway, Ruby and Zwei find a hole.

"Man, I wonder if this leads to Undertale?"

The hole expands, casting Ruby to the Underground while leaving the dog to advance the plot.

"What's that Zwei? Ruby fell down a comically large hole? Well, gang, let's go holing."

"I don't think that's a word, and already I'm disgusted, Yang."

Meanwhile, inside of the whole, Ruby finds herself to be a bit tied up for the moment.

"Ugh, I don't have the time for puns now."

"Welcome to the Underground. How was the fall?"

"I make one Undertale reference and already I get shit for it. What do you want, Roman?"

"Well, mainly, I don't want meddling kids keep butting themselves into my plans like a neglected child. Second, you like my trains?"

So we're in an underground train station. Okay.

"Why Roman? Why do any of this?"

"Because my father was a Redditor."

"Seriously?"

"Nah. Anyway, meet my new partner Neo."

Here comes the best character in the show everybody.

Hi.

"What was that?"

"Oh, Neo can't speak and her snark is so powerful, it bleeds into reality."

"That doesn't make any fucking sense."

You don't make sense.

"Oh, gottem. Now, time to tell the gamers to not let anyone fuck with the train."

After Roman leaves, the rest of our heroes descend into the Hole.

"Alright, we found Ruby. Hey, let's fuck with a train."

'Hey, Yang. Anyway, I don't think we can let the gamers get away with the sponsorships or whatever the plot is now."

"I gave up a long time ago."

"You quit like two episodes ago, Blake."

"Never mind that girls. One of our goals was to find the plot. Not only was it underground, but it was underground!"

"What the fuck are you talking about, Oobleck?"

"Basically, we need to fuck with that train until it fucks no more."

"Blow it up?"

"Yes, Blond one."

And so our heroes get on the train, but are unable to stop it before it starts it commute. Unfortunately, they are blocked by angry New Jersians already late to their work. And so, our heroes fight off the commuters before entering the train.

There, they split up into four groups. Yang fights an Ice Cream, Weiss engages in a duel with Bane from the Dark Knight Rises, Blake attacks a Michael Jackson reference, and Ruby puts her Train Simulator skills to the test.

Yang fights Neo in one of the best fights in the volume, yes I say this a lot. However, Neo is too top tier and defeats Yang. Before she goes in for the kill, someone unexpected shows up.

"Alright, you blond bitch, that is the only save I give you. Don't expect mommy to come back from the store because I still need my cigarettes. Also, ice-cream mother fucker, better get out before I cut a third hole in your pelvis."

After that, Weiss goes against a certified Big Man.

"Ah, Schnee, you think you have power here, but you don't. While you trained in the plot, I was born in it; molded by it."

"This is dated even by my standards."

"Die, bitch."

The fight is long and arduous. But, I'm going to skip that and say that Bane fell off because of a hole in the ground.

"Finally, no more Batman jokes."

Blake fights off Roman.

"Riddle me this, Cat Gril. Why does my personality keep changing in every scene?"

"Fucking…I don't know. Because this was written in three days."

"Wrong, but the reason is the memes."

"Oh God damn it,"

"You see, Cat Girl, I have amassing more than just sponsorships. I've been gaining the raw power of the internet to unleash my master plan!"

"And what is that, exactly?"

"Oh, you'll see soon enough."

Ruby and Oobleck make it to the train controls, but there are some problems. Mainly that some mother fucker stole the breaks. Really can't have shit in Detroit. So the train crashes and opens a big hole. Turns out that hole was for the zoo and now all of the animals are loose.

And so, our heroes, RWBY, Zwei, and Oobleck come up with a plan.

"Girls, we have to kill all the animals. We can't have a Madagascar moment on our hands!"

And so, one of the largest battles happens. Every hero is here: RWBY, JNPR, the teachers, and CFVY all join the fray in killing endangered species. If you wanted to learn more about CFVY, then go read a book. There's no time to develop side characters in our story.

And so, the day is saved with most of the city destroyed. Our heroes take a break looking over the sunset.

"Well, girls, we did it. Racism is no more."

"Ruby, we didn't even tackle racism. Why are you saying that?"

"Sorry, Weiss. Still thinking about Madagascar."

"Well, I certainly had fun."

"Yang, your definition of fun is beating down people who failed to pay you back in dark alleyways."

"You know me so well, Weiss."

"That's great and all. But did we learn anything about the plot? Who is the driving force for all of this? Is there something bigger that's threatening us?"

"Well, Blake, to answer it simply: No. We didn't"

"Well, Yang, that's…pretty bad, actually."

Meanwhile, our villains are having a gay old vaudeville.

"Man, I didn't know there were so many wolves in the zoo."

"And I get to upload their deaths onto LiveLeak."

"You're the worst, Mercury."

"I know."

"Emerald, Mercury, stop retweeting and gaze upon my work."

"What? Did you region-blocked Youtube videos now, Cinder?"

"No, Mercury, I have gained something greater. Allies to overthrow this cringe society."

Now, an old friend emerges from the shadows.

"Yes, Cinder. And now, the gamers will rise up as the true masters of society. And nothing will stop me getting my Goth Cat Girl GF!"

Elsewhere…

"Hey, Ozpin, you hear an edgelord incel screeching somewhere?"

"No, Jimmy, have you been using Reddit again?"

"No. I had people use it for me."

"Whatever. Be on your guard. These Browser Wars are only going to get stupider and stupider the longer this show goes on."

"So, what do you advise we do?"

"We get dumb enough to pull the plot out of our ass."

And that's done. God, these take so long to write. But's it's worth it to read your reactions.

Once again, thank you to everyone who has followed, favorited and left reviews. They mean a lot to mean. Even this long shitpost of a story.

Don't expect Volume 3 to come out anytime soon. That's going to take some work. In the meantime, you should check out my other stories. They are a bit more serious, but I think you will like them.

Anyway, that's all I got. See ya next time!