Damn another chapter tbh I'm proud I've gotten this far in my story. Sorry for the longer wait, I'm currently in school right now and had to take a break from writing to focus. I know this only makes 3 chapters so far but now that I've been writing this more I have a clearer outline of where I wanna take this and I INTEND to see it all the way through!!! So with that being said I hope you enjoy and know I don't own these characters :D
Well this was awkward, to say the least. First day back and I find myself at a table with the two people I wasn't ready to confront yet, that and my nosy parents. The last thing I wanted when I came back home was to be in the presence of either Hinata OR her father, and here I was with both.
We were at this "Italian" restaurant my parent's use to bring us to when we were little. I say "Italian" but really it was just a place that sold decent pasta and garlic bread. As a kid I use to think it was so fancy, like if we came to eat here it was a special occasion. I remember the first time my parents brought Hinata, she whispered into my dads ear what she wanted to order, and did this every time we went out for dinner. While my mom knew all of my likes and dislikes so she would order for herself and then for me. I use to think it was odd that Hinata would do that but, then I remembered it was always her and her own dad, and that was probably what she would do with him. I would always get mac and cheese, and she would get spaghetti, and more often than not we would fall asleep together on the car ride home. How simple life was, compared to my current "situation".
"So Hinata, what are you're plans for this summer?" My mother asked over her dinner salad.
"Well, I'm currently trying to get an internship at this art gallery downtown. They only take about 3 interns soooo I'm hoping I'm one of them. It's only 3 days a week and every other Saturday so the schedule isn't too bad at all."
"Well of course they have to pick YOU my dear! They would be crazy not to!" My mother was always extremely enthusiastic about anything involving Hinata and her success in the world.
"Yes, well she has one more interview and if everything goes right then she should get in."
Hinata's father was always someone I somewhat had a hard time reading. He was stern, yet very protective when it came to his daughter and he wanted nothing but the best for her. I had over heard my dad talking to him one night when he came to pick Hinata up. He was telling my dad how much more empathetic he had to now be that his wife was gone. That I guess Hinata's mom was always the more compassionate one, and now that it was just the two of them, he had to learn to also be like that. I remember thinking "how do you not know how to be nice, ESPECIALLY to someone like Hinata, she made it so easy?!" She was kind and sweet and always had good manners, unlike myself who was constantly getting in trouble for talking back. But now I know he meant that he had to learn had to be both her father and mother. And that filling the emotional whole that his wife left was nearly impossible to do, but he was willing to do anything if it meant his daughter's happiness.
"Well I'm sure she'll get it, she's a very talented young lady with a bright future."
"Thank you Minato, but I won't know until next week. My interview is on Monday and they'll send out emails on Tuesday to confirm who got in."
She said smiling to my father while her cheeks gained that rosy hue like they always did when someone complimented her. But it was even more special because it was my dad, you see they always had a certain special relationship my dad and Hinata. I think it was both of their personalities, they were both so alike. More introverted than extroverted, always polite and kind to others, and beyond understanding to people. Truly the best kind of people I know.
"Well you let us know as soon as you find out! Then we have another reason to all go out to dinner again!" My mom chimed in laughing at the end of her sentence.
Oh ya that's right, we went out to dinner because my parents had planned it with Hiashi and hadn't expected me home tonight. So here I was trying to blend into the wallpaper as much as I could while eating cheese raviolis.
"And you Naruto, are you planning on staying home now that you're back?" So much for blending into the wallpaper.
"Uh yes sir, I do actually. I'm hoping to get a job as soon as I can but first my parents anniversary, then we'll see about me being able to get work anywhere." I said with a nervous smile, I was still unsure where me and Hiashi stood at this point in time. I mean, I WAS the guy who upset Hinata and left her when I was supposed to be the one watching out for her. But so far the night was going well and he had been nothing but gracious to me, still, I felt uneasy about the whole situation.
"Good I'm glad to hear that, it was strange not seeing you around almost 24/7. Your mom had no one to yell at and I know Hinata missed you."
"Oh don't you worry about her yelling at someone, she yells plenty enough at the tv at home."
"I can't help if people are stupid and don't know the price of things! Do they not go grocery shopping?!"
As the conversation between my parents and Hiashi continued about the price is right I zoned out, and found myself staring across the table at Hinata. "I know Hinata missed you." He had said it so casually and so assured, like it was a topic that had been brought up before with her. I could tell she was embarrassed by what her dad had just said, she refused to look up at me as if her food was the most interesting thing in the room right now. Her face was pink and her posture was stiff to say the least, I found myself smirking slightly at that. Some things never change I guess.
But before I could tear my eyes off of her to rejoin the conversation, she looked up.
It wasn't for long, barely even a second maybe but she did look at me. And in that second I felt like things could definitely get better between us again.
"Hinata my dear why don't you tell Naruto about the award you won this spring?" Hiashi asked his daughter why simultaneously cutting into his medium rare steak.
"Oh uh I'm sure he doesn't want to hear about that, I mean it wasn't all that important anyway."
"No no tell him Hinata! We never got to update him about it!"
"Mom it's fine, if she doesn't want to tell me she doesn't have to ya know."
"Ya...I'm sure you wouldn't be interested in it anyway." Remember when I said I thought the night was going fine and things could get better?
"I mean, I AM interested but it seems like YOU don't wanna tell me so it's fine."
"Well it's just that YOU never seemed to ask what was going on with me the whole time you were gone anyway, soooo I figure, why start now?" Hinata had never been this passive aggressive to me or maybe ANYONE in her whole life as far as I knew. But here she was as she sat eating her baked ziti without once making eye contact with me.
"Ya well I did. And it seemed like you were doing fine without me." Why was I such a prideful asshole? I know she had asked about me when I first left, my parents would tell me, and I asked about her. But because I'm stupid beyond belief I would just get annoyed whenever they would tell me how great she was doing. How it sounded like her life could finally just be hers without me, that my worst fear had truly become real. Hinata didn't need me, and if she didn't need me, did she ever?She stopped eating and stared at a spot on the table, I couldn't tell if she wanted to say something back or not.
At this point the whole table had gotten quiet watching our passive aggressive comments being thrown back and forth at one another. No one being quite sure how or when to stop it. Lucky for us the waitress came back.
"So is anyone interested in any desserts tonight?"
"...Excuse me. I need to use the bathroom." Hinata stood up abruptly turned on her heel and walked towards the back of the restaurant . All eyes were again back on me.
I sighed, "Ya I know."
The phrase seemed so ironic coming from my mouth, that someone who seemed to know what they were doing, couldn't do things right. That yes, I was aware of my own words and actions, but I was just a complete idiot and had no solution. And what made it even more embarrassing is that IM the older one, I should have better communication skills by now. Instead, I just fuck around and say the first thing that comes into my head without processing it.
"Sooo are we getting desserts this evening?" The waitress asked again feeling the tension looming in the air at our table.
"Uh ya actually can I get the matcha tiramisu?"
"But you hate matcha Naruto?" My mom asked with more tact in her voice then she had at the beginning of our evening.
"I know...but, Hinata doesn't. I'll see you guys at home I'm leaving. Hiashi please excuse my behavior, I promise I'm gonna make this right...I promise."
I got up grabbed my jacket on the back of the chair and walked out the door before anyone could say anything again it. I drove myself here so my parents would still be able to get back home. Once again I was running away from my issues, acting like if I walked out of the circle in which they resided, then I didn't have to deal with them. But, this was the last time, this was the last time I acted like a coward about something that was my fault to begin with. Because let's face it, sometimes you're wrong, sometimes it is your fault, sometimes it's you who said or did something that hurt others, but that shouldn't stop you from trying to be a better person. And even then you'll fuck up over and over again, damn God knows I have.
But God knows I also never give up, I've always been stubborn like that, these last couple of years it's been my downfall I will admit. But it never use to be. It was the thing that got me onto the baseball team, what led me to getting into college, hell, it was even the thing that got me to beat Majoras Mask when I was like 11! And now it's gonna be the thing that fixes all the shit I messed up. So Hinata, please I know I have no right to ask anything of you but if you let me listen to what you have to say I will. And even if you don't understand what my actions have been until now, please just listen and let me start from somewhere. Let me start, because once I do, I won't stop.
By the time I got home my body felt completely exhausted, the weight of the day finally dawning on me. The drive back home wasn't long at all, but the anticipation of what was to come ate away at me the whole time. My plan was come home, catch up with my parents, eat some dinner, watch some tv, and go to bed. But as God likes to do to me when I have plans is usually to ruin them.
I walked up the stairs and back into my room, falling on the bed not even bothering to take my clothes off from the day. I would, I just needed a minute.
"Why are you such an idiot? And why am I surprised about it? Sasuke's been saying it for years so why is there still a shock value?" I said out loud to no one in particular, I was alone and knew I would be for at least 15 more minutes.
"Damn, I wanna smoke right now." I'm not a smoker but whenever I'm stressed out one blow of that deadly thing hits the spot like no other. I had cigarettes on me, maybe about 4 or 5 from the pack Shikamaru didn't finish, talk about a smoker, the guy practically lived off the stuff.
Checking the time I decided I would hope in the shower real quick before my parents came back, lay down and wait for them to go to bed. Then if I was still awake, which I knew I would be, I would go to our backyard and have a quick smoke. I just needed one, otherwise I would be up all night.
The shower didn't help too much to relax me mentally but, physically I felt a lot better, less sore and tense I would say. As I laid down in my room trying to clear the turmoil that was currently residing in my head I heard my parents walk through the door.
"Thank you so much again Hinata, and again I apologize for Naruto's behavior, I promise you he WILL be saying sorry!"
"It's fine Kushina really, but thank you. I'm sure he's going through a lot right now and I wanna be the least of his worries so it's fine really." I could see Hinata's face now, she probably had her hands up trying to diffuse my mom with that fake smile to show she was "okay".
"Well I say it's not fine! You don't always have to be sweet to the boy ya know, in my opinion we might have been TOO lenient on him if he's acting like this!"
"Kushina come on now, this is between them, so you can't give your opinion if you don't know the whole story." The ever middle ground dad.
"Ya I know...well goodnight my dear I hope your evening wasn't too ruined."
"It wasn't I promise, goodnight to you guys too."
And just like that I heard our front door close and my parents footsteps ascending up our staircase.
I turned on my side away from the door, I knew they would peak in and I didn't want them knowing I was still awake. Sure enough I heard the door creak open and could see the stream of light that pooled in. I heard my dad sigh and just like that the light was gone and the door was closed. I know they were disappointed in me, I was disappointed in me. My life was going to shit real fast and I was doing nothing but seemingly enjoying the ride.
After about an hour I decided to finally get up and go outside to the back. I didn't sound like my parents were up anymore, no mumble of their voices or the tv still being on so I assumed the cost was clear.
The night was cool, nothing crazy but just that night time coolness that feels good when your body is even slightly warm. I seemed to always run warmer than most so the weather was very much welcomed. I sat on the steps to our back porch, well, more like a deck really. I pulled out one solitary cigarette from my jacket pocket along with the lighter I brought. It was cheap but, it would do what I needed it to do.
"Okay one quick smoke then you go inside, don't even have to finish the whole thing."
I lit it up and pulled as much smoke as I could into my mouth. Damn did something so bad for you ever feel so good in that moment. I could see why Shikamaru smoked like a chimney, when life was is at its lows, it seems like this might be the only consistent thing, and when you're low, constants are far and few.
"Those things will kill you...you know."
I nearly dropped the stupid thing as I heard the voice I would know anywhere. I looked up, and there she was, standing on the unofficial line that divided her yard from mine. The line that had seemed so meaningless growing up, had now become a wall, and it was getting taller and taller by the hour. And there she was on the other side of it, standing in a black hoodie and dark green shorts. Hair pulled into a big bun at the top of her head, and eyes that looked right through me like no other, staring knowingly behind a pair of black rimmed glasses.
"Ya...I know."