Chapter 3

Freedom comes Cold

"Pink nosed whisky encounter."

It was just like you left it- A barely standing shack of horror, with no possibility of renovation, no plumbing and no chimney. In other words...

"Home sweet home!"

You kicked off the snow from your boots and stepped into the building. Hands on your hips, back straight and a keen eye looking it over to see if anyone else had been there since you left. Nope, nothing out of the ordinary. Still drafty, dreary and dark.

After you left the ruins behind, this was the only building you found outside of Snowding that didn't contain an angry ball of hatred. The hinges of the door sounded like dying cats in heat whenever you dared to move it, but other than that it was functional. The inside had been stripped (previously robbed), so there were no furniture or decorations to speak of. There was a huge pile of dust by the only existing window and pale spots on the wall where there had been posters or paintings before. There was one particular spot where there was a clear silhouette of a giant vintage clock, since long looted and gone. The shack wasn't a place you felt particularly safe or warm in, but it would have to do.

You had, quite shamelessly, squatted here for a short while before Sans the buzzer fiend had found you. You knew you should have stayed off the path, but maybe you'd grown a little cocky in your short time underground.

You dumped your bag by the door with a sigh. It felt unreal being back here. With… Permission? Did this mean you could go into town, get a job and start… Trying for some kind of life here? Maybe life down here wouldn't be so bad after-

"knock knock."

Oh no.

Without a shadow of a doubt, Sans the skeleton stood behind the newly closed door of your cold shack. But you just saw him! Not even two hours ago! You weren't mentally prepared for this.

"... Who's there?" You tensed your shoulders.

"boo…"

"Uh, boo who?"

"fucking crybaby!" An obnoxious laugh rang out along with the offended screeching of doors who'd rather die than be opened. Sans kicked it in like yesterday's garbage kicked the curb. Your door stood no chance against his tacky shoes or shark-like senses for vulnerable women with poor homesecurety in the underground.

"hehe." Sans chuckled when the upper hinge of your door broke. "this place is a dump!"

You watched helplessly as Sans let himself in. "You can't come in here!" You tried. "I have the paperwork right here!" You waved it desperately, "So… Uh! Papyrus said it was okay for me to come here!"

He rolled his eyes, "yeah, i know, doll." Disinterested, he looked around, "just making sure… you're all… set." He let his red pinpricks look you over slowly.

You felt the hair on your arms raise. "I'm good, thanks." You said tersely.

"uh-huh."

Before you had time to think about it you found yourself backing away when he walked further into your shack. Sans walked by close enough for you to feel the heat his magic naturally emitted. It was a meager second, but it was enough for your hackles to rise further.

He rapped his knuckles on the walls and stomped on the floor. You watched him, not sure what to think.

"Uh, what… What are you doing?"

"hm?" He didn't pay attention to you. Rather he was looking at the floor by the window. "hehehe…" He chuckled. You assumed it was an insult to your shacks general unkempt state. The giant pile of dust certainly wasn't helping in convincing him of your homemaking skills.

He did another lap around the meager space. Testing the walls and floorboards, checking the corners and further fraying your nerves. It was easier before when other people knew he was with you and would give him shit for killing you.

Now it was just you and him with nobody else around who cared.

Alone.

In the middle in the woods in an abandoned shack. Your life was a horror movie.

You eyed the sad looking excuse for a door. Maybe if you ran away- No, you've been trapped for too long, too out of shape and clumsy… Sans was a big boy, but he could be very fast when he wanted to be.

His big stupid head was turned away from you, but you had a strong feeling he would react in a heartbeat if you even tried moving to the door. Your courage flagged and died as quickly as it came.

"Look, I give up. What do you want?" You said tiredly.

"didn't read the contract, did ya?" He gave you a toothy grin. Something about his expression made you feel judged.

You glanced at the papers still in your hands. It was a pretty hefty stack to bravely read in Papyrus office, something you didn't even think about doing while you were there. He said, "Sign Here", and you obeyed like a life-loving coward looking forward to living. There was something about the massive, terrible Papyrus that screamed not to let him wait. Ever.

"Uh, I mean…" You faltered at Sans' look. "I was briefed… Briefly about it. And I was gonna!" You hugged the papers to your chest. "Gonna read it when I got home! Which I am now, so go away so that I can start doing that!"

He didn't look impressed. Not that you thought he ever had very high thoughts about you to begin with.

"well, doll. If I were you, I'd hurry the fuck up and skip to the, 'kill the human when...', section." He scratched his cheek.

Your mouth opened, closed and opened again.

"page 54."

With controlled movements you handled the stack of papers. Skimming the pages you stopped at page 54 as instructed, "Section 4-8-6, Jurisdiction- PAPYRUS. Part a1, Underground Faction regulation; Section 5B- Conditions Of Human Extermination agreement." You held it in your hands, read it, looked at Sans' face, read it again, made sure you were really holding what you signed and then stopped.

"..."

"yeah… there's a lot to read there, pal. ya can read, right?"

"..."

"gonna be a bummer if ya can't." He chuckled. "fer ya, that is."

"No, wait." You curled over the papers, bending your back and backing yourself into the corner of the room. You looked at the pages following part a1, reading without understanding what you were seeing. "I… Wait, wait… This can't be right."

Sans stayed quiet.

You started skipping pages quickly, trying to find something to ground you, trying to swallow the sudden panic rising up along the bile in your throat.

"How long is that section?" You asked yourself out loud with an unflattering squeak.

"there there, dolly." Sans' deep voice rumbled. Far. Too. Close.

You found yourself looking up further than usual. When did you sit down on the floor? Sans stood over you, a sight that brought back some very unpleasant memories. You cowered in his shadow, still clutching the damning contract.

"don't ya worry bout nothing. see, the moment ya fuck up…" His eye lights went out. "i'll be there."

You were frozen when he went down to your level and patted your cheek with his huge bony hand. "see ya later, n."

An honest to god, heart wrenching crying session later after Sans left, you were feeling empty.

Your upper door hinge was broken and you could be killed by anyone anywhere if you even thought about doing anything wrong. You would probably be beaten to death by Sans. No wait, bitch slapped to death by Sans (previous experience far too fresh). You had no one who cared about you down here. The shack was cold and shitty, you didn't have a job or money or… Or warmth or a toilet.

You started crying again.

Red rimmed and irritated, your eyes were wet yet felt dry. You angrily tried to dry your tears but they just kept falling. "Get a grip." You slapped yourself. "Get a fucking grip!" You pinched yourself on the inside of your upper arm. Hissing you clenched your teeth. Releasing the skin you let out a breath and leaned back on the wall.

"I'm gonna live." You muttered. "I'm gonna live!" The floor made a hollow thud when you hit it with a fist but it was enough. You were resolute. You weren't gonna rot here. You were gonna prosper! Sans could peep through your windows, come to your shack and do whatever the hell he wanted. He wasn't going to scare you from trying to live here! He wouldn't catch you doing anything!

Today had been exhausting but you felt better now that you had a goal.

Outside the window, the underground was dark. First thing tomorrow, you were going to go out there and get a job. For now, it was time to sleep and hopefully you'd wake up bright and early with a new life ahead of you.

"Hello, sorry to bother you but-" The door closed in your face.

"Hi! I'm a human and I'm looking for-" You were shoved out of the store.

"... Wow, I love ice-cream! You look like you're pretty busy, huh? Maybe you could use another pair of hands to-" The blue furred bunny dude rolled his cart away.

Your head sank.

Okay, so finding a job was harder than you thought. Snowdin was small, too small for the kind of opportunity you were looking for. Nobody wanted to hire a human, not even a desperate one willing to work for crumbs and a glass of water. You still weren't sure about eating snow when you were thirsty. Pretty sure that gives you worms or something? At least that's what your babysitter told you once.

Your belly gurgled. Groaning you clutched your stomach and looked around. Maybe you could start trying to eat bark from the pine trees? You read people ate bark during hard times somewhere… But are you really that desperate?

Maybe.

Staring at the treeline forlornly wasn't going to solve anything, but maybe walking further into town would.

You set out back to Snowdin where the glares were cold but the clipped rejections were even colder. The shopkeeper bunny, who in another life would have been adorable, gave you nothing short of a deranged smile when she saw you come back into town from her shopswindow. It gave you the shivers.

There was this heavy feeling down here, like the monsters thrived on other's misery. Like, it made them feel good to see you struggle to get by. They were either glaring at you if you tried to talk to them or they outright ignored you like you didn't exist.

You decided to keep your head down walking in further. It started to get dark out so it wasn't until you saw a light reflecting on the snow that you looked up from pure curiosity.

Grillby's stood proud amongst the darkness. Filled with rowdy voices, loud laughter and jeers from the group of dogs playing cards, the place looked almost welcoming. The bartender's flame made it look beautiful and otherworldly. Kind of like the feeling you got in your heart when you thought of magical beings as a child. For a moment you let yourself soak up the scene and forget how cold your legs and feet were.

Then your eyes were pulled by something moving. A dark mass shifted next to the bar. It took you only a second to recognize that pale round skull and the big fluffy looking jacket but when you did your mouth slipped into a displeased frown. As if he could feel your eyes, Sans turned his head and looked out the window. His red pinpricks found you with a snap.

'There was a second which felt like a whole minute before he grabbed his glass on the bar and raised it in your direction with a smug smirk. 'Look', he seemed to say with the gesture, 'I'm in here cozy and warm while you're out there, cold and pathetic.'

As soon as his unspoken insult had hit home, Sans turned around to the bartender and ordered another. You were dismissed. An insignificant ant in the great world, not worthy of his attention.

Looks like you weren't going to be getting a job at Grillby's. At least not as long as Sans went there. Now that you thought about it, wasn't that douchebag gonna be hanging out at most places in Snowdin? It was a small place after all, so it wasn't just you being depressed and paranoid. The fewer encounters you had with him the better! That was the only silverlining you could find about your unemployment- Less chance to put your eyeballs through the strain of having to see that guy! Just seeing him on the other side of that window was enough for you.

Really, you were too tired and hungry to get mad at him. Or even scared of him. There was only so much he could do to you under the contract. So far you hadn't broken any rules so he couldn't legally touch you. The greatest concern was the lack of heating or food in your shack, your lack of a job and the everlasting search for toilet paper.

With a heavy sigh you started trudging back to the shack, your soul rank with the smell of failure.

You didn't get very far.

"Hey. Hey, you!"

At first you didn't register the low voice, not until you heard a loud hiss, like an angry cat. Your head swivelled around until a dim glow in the alley next to Grillby's caught your attention. The glowing butt of a cigarette lit up before the smell of a billowing cloud of smoke wafted towards you.

"Yeah, you!" The voice hissed. "You're that weirdo, aren't you?"

"Uh", you replied, frozen mid-step. The glowing eyes opened wider over the cigarette's glow. They were an intense green.

"Well? You're the human, right?" The green eyes shifted in the dark.

"Yeah, that's me. The… Human." Holy shit. There is a shifty looking literal monster in a dark alleyway luring you closer. And you were falling for it. You couldn't help taking a few hesitant steps closer.

"Heh, yeah. Thought so." You could see how the life was sucked out of the cigarette with one breath. Right after that, another cloud of smoke smacked you in the face. It made you feel dirty.

While your eyes watered and you tried to discreetly blink it away, the voice continued. "So, you're looking for work, right? Take it from me, little buddy, you won't find it in this crappy town."

"Yeah? Well, this is where I live now. So gotta… You know…" Was it inappropriate to smile? You felt stupid. "Keep trying!"

"Heh, you won't last a day with that attitude." From the dark an orange cat monster stepped out. He looked tired when he dropped the butt of the cigarette on the ground and took out another, lighting it lazily while watching you.

His whiskers were short, his left ear was torn and his fur looked thick. He reminded you of late Mr. Numnums, the brave, grumpy and cuddly cat you'd seen around your old neighborhood.

"It's nice to plan ahead for the future. I would too, if I had one." He smiled bitterly. You didn't know what to say to that so you kept quiet.

"So." He flicked away ashes with a deft movement. "I've been watching you for a bit. You really suck at this. This, fitting in business, I mean." He gave you a critical once over. "They can barely even stand to look at you." He said when his gaze reached your eyes again.

"Excuse me, I'm doing the best I can to ge-"

He interrupted you with a laugh. "Nah, buddy, you're really not. And it's perfect!"

You studied his body language for a bit, trying to figure it out instead of getting offended. "What are you implying?"

"I'm saying you just got hired."

"What?"

"Look, I know what it's like to be different, have dreams and all that shit. But let's face it, dreams are called dreams for a reason, right?"

"That's… Dark."

"Yeah. Yeah, it's shitty. So let me give you some advice, little buddy. Never trust well adjusted people! They will take you, crush your spirit in their grubby metallic hands and laugh at you while playing a peppy soundtrack where the lyrics are all about how you're a fucking failure!" He crushed his cigarette in his fist angrily. "I'm all out of vacation days and I'm already in hell!"

You took a step back. He noticed and straightened himself. Regarding the crushed cig he threw it in the snow and took out another one. Though this one looked different. It had a faint blue shimmer. Taking a long drag he held it in for a while before letting the smoke escape his mouth and little cute pink cat nose. His eyes lidded and it was as if all his anger just disappeared. "So anyway…" He continued like the outburst never happened. "You're gonna die, buddy. Or at least, your dreams are. Take it from me. I'm 23 years old and I've already wasted my entire life. But-" He paused with a finger in the air, "at least you can make some gold from other people's crushed dreams, too!"

"Wait, what is this job about? So far it doesn't sound like a job offer at all." It didn't sound very pleasant either.

He took another drag. His cat eyes were almost completely black now. The pupil is big and perfectly round. It was very cute. You had to actively concentrate on the conversation.

"I'm Felix, some call me BP, don't ask why. I'm a drug dealer on the side, if you know what I mean..."

Okay, that woke you up from your cat induced feelings of safety and moral decency. "What? For real? You?" He was far too cute!

"That's right, little buddy! And you are, too!"

"No I'm not!"

"Yeah, you are."

"No! I'm not a-" You looked around sneakily and lowered your voice. "...I'm not a drug dealer." You whispered.

"Check your pocket."

You really didn't want to check your pocket. You had the worst feeling in your gut. Still, your hand went to your pocket where you immediately felt a small packet. It was covered in rough paper and sorta thick. You grabbed it and pulled it out to look at it. It was neatly folded in dark paper with faint indents of cigarettes, which you now very strongly suspected weren't just ordinary cigarettes.

"Old supplier chain, the bunny lady keeping the inn, you know? Well, she was killed a while back. Market is still thirsty and we've got the suppliers. Do you understand, little buddy?"

"What is this? Is it… Marijuana?" You whispered the last part, just waiting for Sans to burst out of the bar, ready to call Papyrus and prepare the invitations for your public execution.

"Never heard of that before. Any good?" His ears perked.

"I don't know. But what is it?" You indicated the little package.

"Just some herbs, some echoflowers, dust and dreams, you know?"

"And you smoke this to get high?"

He looked at you like you were dumb. "Yes. Just dusty dreams. Called EDD, stands for echo dream dust. So… You in, buddy?"

You looked at the packet. It looked innocent in your hand. Easy to hide and easy to carry- Wait a minute!

"I'm not gonna sell drugs!"

Felix threw gold coins on the ground. They plopped partway into the snow, but the gold still glimmered from the light in the bar. "That's your cut just for that order. More than enough to buy food for a week."

"That's drug money!"

He shrugged. "Better than starving to death. Nothing is for free down here. Get used to it."

"But I don't know anything about drugs!"

"Good. Tell that to the royal guards if they catch you and we're set."

Felix started heading back into the dark alleyway. "Client is the bunny lady in the shop, late supplier chain's sister. She ordered a pick-me-up. Make sure she gives you 2000 for it and get the gold to me, got it You'll do it. Meet me by the border of waterfall in three days so we can get this rolling." He said over his shoulder.

"I didn't say I'd do it!" You tried.

"We'll kill you if you don't, buddy!" He laughed and then he was gone.

The gold coins were still there.

After only a moment's hesitation, you bent down to collect the coins into your hands. They clinked as they settled in your pocket, but the weight was comforting. You turned away to head back to the bunny ladie's store before you changed your mind when-

"Remember I'll be watching you, BUDDY!" Felix hissed in your face, appearing from nowhere right as you turned, scaring you half to death.

He clipped your shoulder roughly as he passed you, again heading back to the alley where you hoped he would stay this time. Clutching your chest, you stared after him while feeling your heart racing.

At least you didn't piss yourself.

The bunny lady's shop was still open when you got there. The dull shopbell sounded like the sad dusty jingle of an 86 year old man's viagra pills, stuck in an old tin jar, disguised as caramels. Or maybe that was just your emotional state.

The lady seemed to sour when she saw you but she didn't say anything until you reached the counter. "Get out, freak." She said camly.

"I-" Your hand tightened around the small packet in your pocket. "I'm sorry about your loss."

Her angry features tightened, "If it weren't for the guard, you'd already be dead before you reached the first lamppost by the village square!" Her eyes were hard, the pain buried deep, yet untouched under the ice. Her shop had the perfect vantage point to see it from where she stood. "Now, shut up and get out."

You swallowed, knowing you had messed up again. Silence always seemed to be your best bet, so you relied on it once again. Slowly, as to not startle, you took out the packet, got on the tip of your toes to reach, and placed it on the counter, in front of her crossed arms. She looked down and her face went slack.

You retracted your hand quicker than you placed it down and returned it to your pocket. Trying to give her a little space, waiting for a que of some sort. You weren't quite sure how this was meant to play out.

Her pupils shrank and expanded several times in uneven intervals. It settled on small pinpricks and sharpened.

"EDD." She uncrossed her arms and leaned on the counter heavily. "Where the hell did you get your hands on this, human?" She questioned harshly.

"Felix or, uh, BP."

"Ha!" Her laugh was short and sharp. "That dusty old fucker. Always moving something that one." She swiped the packet from the counter and hid it in her cleavage. As soon as she was done she gave you a look, bent down and rooted around until she got her paws on some hidden compartment you couldn't quite see from where you stood. It sort of felt like a test when she did that. But you were pretty sure that particular compartment would forever stay empty after this indication of its existence. She slapped down a pile of gold on the counter between you, still looking you in the eyes. Her smile was too sharp to be sincere.

"Will that be all?" She asked.

You gave a glance to her wares, feeling the gnawing in your gut you made a decision. "No. I'll have two cinnamon bunnies, please." You rooted around in your pocket and got out the needed gold for them. The lady looked fed up already but accepted the money without a big fuss and gave you your treat. They were as big as footballs, but you managed to balance them.

"Now get the fuck out." She hissed, still smiling.

You gathered the money she'd given you for the EDD and hurried out the door, the sad jingle following you.

You'd just sold drugs for money. You… You were a drug dealer.

You were a criminal!