III

The June sun illuminated the entire terrace. She turned her face towards the sun and sighed. She loved summer. For its warmth, fresh air, refreshing wind. Summer could last the whole year for her. But it wasn't possible.

"What are you doing here at five in the morning?"

Lucius' sleepy voice made her smile. It was a sad smile, barely noticeable.

"I couldn't sleep."

"You had a nightmare again?"

She nodded sadly, and Lucius pursed his lips. Everything was coming back.

"Hermione, look at me please." He asked in a softly expectant tone. She was standing with her eyes closed and tried to breathe steadily.

She didn't answer immediately, but after a second, she said, "Almost a year has passed since the last attack. From the last nightmare. This is a good result."

She opened her eyes and looked at him. "One year." she emphasized. "We could have guessed it would come back." Her voice trembled. He could see the panic rising in her eyes.

"Close your eyes, take a deep breath.'' He said, looking away from her, his fingers lightly brushing her wrist. He started massaging her muscles.

"I'm scared, Lucius. I'm so fucking scared."

Lucius hugged Hermione tightly. He could feel her heart fluttering, feel her chest rise and fall with rapid breathing.

"Hayden figured out I am pregnant."

Lucius was slightly surprised, but far from shocked.

Hayden was very intelligent and he noticed and understood a lot. Sometimes much more than they would like to believe.

"How?" Hermione leaned on him and tried to calm her breathing. Lucius could tell she had not been in very good shape lately.

"He noticed how you started to treat me. It wasn't difficult for him to understand what was going on."

Lucius stiffened at these words and replied, "After so many years of watching."

Failures. They wanted to add, but it was left unspoken.

Hermione decided to postpone Hayden's visit to her parents. In this situation, she preferred Draco transport his brother during his visit to Oakshire. She was very afraid for her pregnancy because she could see that her mental health was getting worse. If the nightmares returned, the attack seemed inevitable.

"Draco is going to visit us today." Lucius changed the subject. "He left me a note in company records."

Hermione nodded and replied, "May he not be a messenger of bad news."

Hayden had been looking forward to Draco's visit from the very early morning. He adored his brother immensely. It was a strange relationship, considering the age difference. Scorpius, son of Draco and Astoria, was the same age. The two also got along well, but it was a completely different bond.

Hayden had started asking questions some time ago why there was such a big age difference between them. He was surprised to discover that, in fact, Mom and Draco were the same age. It amazed him. In the world around him, this was not a common occurrence. After discovering the ages of his mother and brother, he realized that his beloved dad did not look like other fathers. He was clearly older and more experienced. Hayden didn't quite know why he felt that way, but he did.

Draco's visits to Oakshire alone were rare, and every moment Hayden could spend with him was treated as a treasure. Finally, a dozen or so minutes after twelve, Draco emerged from the fireplace. He was not alone, which surprised Hermione a little. Scorpius was with him.

"Hermione, Dad." He smiled faintly as they both appeared in the living room. "Scorpius, say hello." Draco nudged his son, who reacted immediately.

"Grandpa, Hermione, nice to see you." Scorpius looked around the house curiously. It was his first visit to Oakshire. Draco had never before had decided to take him here. This fact could mean a lot and little at the same time.

Hermione felt very uncomfortable. If Scorpius was here, it was mostly to distract Hayden's attention from whatever Draco had to say to them. And if it was on purpose, then …

Lucius grabbed her hand and squeezed it firmly. He saw the consternation spread across his wife's face. She shook herself immediately, but Lucius still kept his eyes on her. This small gesture did not escape Draco's attention.

Hayden appeared in the living room and ran immediately to his brother. He hugged him tightly, which amused both Draco and Scorpius. It took Hayden a moment to realize Scorpius was also in the room. Draco released him and pushed him towards his son.

"Why don't you play outside while I have a few words with Hermione and Lucius? Hayden, you must show Scorpius your treehouse. He will be delighted, there are no such attractions at Malfoy Manor."

Hayden seemed frustrated with the situation, but on the other hand, he knew that Draco's tone was firm. He sounded almost the same as Dad, when Dad was not willing to negotiate.

Eventually the two left the living room and ran into the garden.

There was an uncomfortable silence in the living room, until Draco showed them the envelope he was holding in his hands. Hermione turned pale and put her hand to her mouth.

"Scorpius received his letter from Hogwarts yesterday. I think Hayden will get it any day now. You should be prepared for questions."

Lucius was cool-headed, but Hermione seemed very upset. On the one hand, she knew this was going to happen; there was no other way out. But on the other hand… It was always too early.

"Astoria recently saw Ginny Potter. Their son, James, is the same age as Hayden and Scorpius. Which means he got a letter, too."

Hermione didn't know anything about the lives of Ginny and Harry. The last twelve years have been separated by a great black line. She had no idea what was going on in the magical world at all. Until now, she had not needed this knowledge. Lucius probably knew, but kept it all a secret. Hermione's health was so fragile that he preferred not to risk it.

"I also have other information. Please sit on the sofa." These words could not herald anything good. With great hesitation, both Lucius and Hermione sat down. Draco hovered for a moment, but finally took a newspaper from his robe pocket.

Before handing it to them, he said uncertainly, "There are rumors." He started and stopped. "Which is not exactly gossip. The magical world learned about Hayden. The press picked up on it and…"

Hermione felt a wave of heat sweep through her entire body. Nothing good can happen.

A strong grip on a male hand held it in check.

"…And everyone knows you have a son. It's probably my fault in a way. Once upon a time, Scorpius and Astoria discussed you and Hayden in a public space." Draco gritted his teeth, then angrily, added. "Someone must have overheard."

Lucius was about to cut in something, but Draco continued, "I'm sorry. It wasn't supposed to be this way."

Lucius shook his head firmly. "It's not anyone's fault. Eventually this fact was going to be revealed. Ultimately, Hayden is due to go to Hogwarts in September, so his identity could not be kept a secret forever."

"It is true." Draco confirmed, still holding the newspaper in his hand. He was fighting with himself. "But there is something else …"

A chill went through Lucius, and Hermione shifted uneasily. Draco handed them the newspaper, opened on the third page. The second they spotted the photo, the room felt cold.

Hayden at the last picnic they organized. Hayden in Hermione's embrace. Hayden shouting something to Lucius. Stealth photos of their home in Oakshire. Their safe place on earth, hidden from unwanted eyes. And that disgusting headline that even Hermione hadn't had time to read.

"Someone must have been sniffing heavily," she whispered weakly, feeling what was coming.

"Scorpius had no idea where you lived." She heard Draco's words through a haze.

She felt dizzy and her heart was pounding like crazy. She felt very hot, but her hands were icy. She felt a tingling sensation around her mouth and on her fingertips. She was so scared she couldn't utter a word.

Lucius knew immediately what was happening to Hermione. Her face was grey and she looked like she was going to throw up any second. Additionally, she started shaking and was on the verge of losing consciousness.

Hermione was having one of the biggest panic attacks Lucius had seen in a good dozen years. He picked her up and carried her out of the living room without a word, leaving Draco there.

Draco turned towards the garden and saw Hayden standing on the terrace. He could see that the young one was disturbed. He must have been watching them for a while. Draco just hoped it was a short while.

"Hayden." He called softly to his brother, and Hayden approached, uncertain.

"Is Mom not feeling well?" he asked, and Draco nodded.

"She feels bad sometimes. I don't like this." His childish voice was soft, terrified.

"She'll be fine. Dad takes care of her." Draco hugged Hayden and he cuddled him. "She'll be fine," he repeated in a reassuring tone, but the young man still seemed worried.

"Mom is pregnant, Draco," he whispered, and Draco chilled.

"We have to keep it a secret then. Do you agree?" Hayden nodded, so Draco ruffled his brother's hair and remembered his son was still outside somewhere. "Go on back outside, Hayden. It will be okay."

Moments later, Draco watched the boys play together in the yard. He already figured out why Hermione had had this dreadful attack. He realized this the moment Hayden told him about her pregnancy. She was concerned about her pregnancy. She feared that history would come full circle. That everything will happen once again. And it will hit just as painfully as it did then.

Hermione was lying in the bedroom, which was dimly lit. She was breathing calmly, so he thought she was most likely asleep. Lucius stared at her and didn't know what to do. He was scared, too. He left the room and returned to his sons.

Draco was ready to travel, Scorpius by his side along with Hayden who had a large backpack on his back.

"We're ready, Dad. We'll be in touch."

Lucius made an effort to smile but couldn't hide his sadness. He knelt down in front of Hayden and hugged him tightly.

"Be polite to Grandma and Grandpa. Rest. Read books. And don't worry too much. " He kissed his forehead and uttered a spell in a whisper.

Just in case.

He said goodbye to Scorpius and Draco and watched them disappear.

When there was silence in the house, he felt a strange emptiness. He went back upstairs and checked that Hermione was breathing steadily. She looked decent, but she needed rest. Especially in her condition.

Hours later, Hermione found her husband in her office. She saw that he had sorted all the letters from Ginny. Meanwhile, she sent a patronus to Draco to thank him for taking care of Hayden. She hadn't done that in years. She hadn't taken her wand out in years. Holding the wand in her hand felt so strange to her. As if she was starting all over again. As if learning everything from scratch.

She was surprised to find that her patronus had changed. It was no longer an otter.

"Hermione." She so loved hearing his voice. "It's time."

She nodded.

"We have to deal with the past. You should read the letters."

"I know." Her voice was indistinct as her mind flooded with memories.

The dam was broken. Nothing could protect her from them anymore.

She had to wade through it again.

She felt a warm hand touch her cheek.

They had to wade through it again. And it would not be an easy or pleasant journey.