"I mean... eventually it will be a great story to tell at partys." Yoongi tried to help the next morning. After my little impromptu birthday party at work, I had left pretty soon after. When I had gotten back home Tae had still been sitting on the couch, apparently waiting for me, looking like a puppy that had gotten caught peeing in my shoes. He apologized but by then there was nothing to be done about it and I hugged him and we went to bed. "If you want I can sleep in your bed and hold you?" "Tae, we said we'd never speak of that again... one day Yoongi will find out and he will never let us forget it." "I don't want to forget it, it was nice. Your sheets smell good." "Yeah but... most people would only do that if they weren't just... "Why can't friends hold each other?" "Look, no friendship cuddles, not tonight, okay? I am exhausted." He nodded, smiled at me one last time and then disappeared into the bathroom.
Now, the next morning, he was at college and Yoongi and I were making dinner. Which usually meant I was sitting on the kitchen counter eating what Yoongi had just chopped up until he got so pissed that he moved everything out of my reach. He was making Lasagne but the ingredients had been really expensive and he had said that maybe this year was the year I understood that curly fries weren't the epitome of fine cuisine. It did smell good. He had also gotten me a nice scarf. As a thank you he had demanded for me to take less long showers in the morning but when he had turned around towards the kitchen I had hugged him from behind and he had at least not pushed me away, even patted my hand a little before moving on.
"It is a funny story, I get it. But I just know he will give me a smug knowing grin every time we see each other now. How am I supposed to ignore him when he knows I want to see him naked?" "I think the answer is quite obvious - you just keep ignoring him - but... you really want to? See him naked, that is?" I shrugged. "If he dropped his clothes in the middle of the exhibition space I think that would be something I would very much like to be present for." "That doesn't sound creepy at all. And what about...you know, being an active part in him getting naked?" "Gross." "How old are you again?" "No I mean... definitely not." "He is pretty hot." "Even you think so?" "What? I have eyes. He has those..." Yoongi was gesturing at his face. "...cheekbones and I wish I was his height. Still not into men, sorry, but he looks good, yeah?" "Yeah." "Then go for it." "I see what you are talking about. But even with casual sex, there is a line. Apart from him being somewhat of a colleague... you wouldn't take Stalin to bed, right? Or Hitler?" Yoongi stopped chopping onions. "You are comparing him to Stalin and Hitler?" "No, but..." "You literally just did. Get your perspective checked, seriously. Just because some guy doesn't drop to his knees as soon as he sees you he is not a war criminal." I didn't answer. Because he was right of course and I had overdone it again. Chewing on the inside of my cheek for a while I asked if I could help and Yoongi just raised an eyebrow in surprise, made me chop some tomatoes. By the time Tae got home Yoongi and I were almost done and actually having a good time. Just cooking in harmony, no snarly comments, which in turn made Tae incredibly happy. All in all, it was still a good birthday, but I couldn't deny being relieved to not have to go back to work for another day.
But eventually, it wasn't half bad when I did. Namjoon wasn't around all the time after all. I spent the first few hours answering what felt like hundreds of emails, organized some transports and had my weekly fight with unreliable suppliers on the phone. And it felt almost normal until he appeared out of nowhere a couple of days later. Well, I was sure Chris was aware, he had just not told us. But maybe it was good that I had no time to psyche myself up in advance. A couple of minutes earlier a buyer had arrived but the artist - of course - arrived fashionably late. Usually, they were hanging out down the street because they were too nervous to be actually late and then waited a bit outside for the dramatic entrance.
It worked. Fuck, it worked. His hair was a glorious mess, he was wearing tight jeans and a dress shirt under his winter coat. He looked smart and cool and casual at the same time. How... As full as I was of myself... most of the time I felt put together at best, but this was a level of planned nonchalance that was just unfair in my eyes. Since he was in a hurry he rushed past our desk, barely nodding towards Sam and me, which she copied, I didn't. He wouldn't have noticed anyway.
The talks seemed to be going well. I couldn't help but notice the buyer getting a bit touchy-feely with Namjoon. Constantly touching his shoulder as if they were old friends. If he didn't like it, Namjoon didn't show it. Maybe they did know each other after all? Or he was simply professional. This wasn't unusual. It wasn't that he was definitely hitting on him, but to some people buying art hanging out with the artist for a little was basically part of the appeal of a purchase. Unless they were only buying for value.
When Chris walked in our direction and shot me a look I knew it was time to make coffee. Honestly, usually, I didn't mind but I saw Namjoon standing behind him pressing his lips together to not grin. Great. The fact that I was bringing them drinks again seemed to amuse him which sent me fuming on my way to the kitchen. I tried to not show it, but there was some colour on my face and when I brought them three cups on a tray I saw his eyes stopping at something and it took me a while till I realized it was my cheeks. Ugh.
The meeting was a success and a little later the buyer left his details with me so I could write a bill to him while they were chitchatting away. After he had left it seemed as if Namjoon wasn't quite sure whether he should stay, standing in front of the desks until Sam looked up, as always very kind, congratulating him. He smiled at her and nodded, but he was still standing there which confused both of us a little. When he finally walked off I looked over at Sam, but she was just shrugging her shoulders.
I should have known what would happen next. I was accompanying Chris to dinner that night that was really more of a meeting. Over dinner with another gallerist to simulate friendship. Usually, I didn't mind much because the food was great and I knew the contacts I could make this way would one day actually pay off. Also, it had to mean I was doing something right. Or at least nothing wrong. When Namjoon wouldn't leave the gallery even though his meeting was long over I eventually figured that Chris probably had invited him to come along and when Chris walked out of his office with his coat in his hand and waved my direction with a smile, he was walking straight to Namjoon. I could still feel his stare on the back of my head when I got into the front seat of a cab, telling the driver where we were going. Clearly, he was even more surprised to be eating with not just Chris than me.
"Multi-sensory dining!" Christ has exclaimed earlier. While I had imagined broccoli stuffed up his ears and nose. But no. 'Modernist cuisine positioned at the intersection of art, science and philosophy' Google had explained to me. Which didn't really explain that much. The pictures looked pretty enough, which... I mean I guess was about the sense of sight? And I totally wanted my food to smell nice. I was a bit afraid of the touch and even sound aspect, but okay. The restaurant looked like it had opened only a few weeks back. The servers were on the verge of crazy friendly and while we were on the way to our table I got a bit dizzy from the light installation simulating a night sky all around us. It was pretty. Just a lot. But our glasses were filled with expensive wine even before the gallerist showed up so I was happy. Chris was making light conversation with Namjoon who was constantly squinting his eyes because of the light effects, but I told myself he really did it because he was an arrogant fuck. While I was squinting myself.
Some of the food was on fire. Some of the food was pretending to be some other food. Some of it was edible flowers covered in syrup. Both the gallerist and Christ kept exclaiming how amazing and fantastic everything was. "We really are lucky to be alive in times like these." Chris finally said while cutting open his gelato in form of a fried egg, which resulted in both Namjoon and me simultaneously choking. The two others looked a little confused which made me hope they didn't realize I had done so to hide the laughter. Seriously, the great revolutions of the 21st century. Renewable energy, the internet... and egg ice cream.
The weird thing was that I felt almost something like solidarity between Namjoon and me because we were going through this weird evening together, but that passed quickly when we left the restaurant and I opened the door, only for him to sneak past me, typing away on his phone, pretending to not even see me and then the two other guys followed suit. Maybe I wasn't just part of the catering team, now I was also a concierge.
We went for drinks at a bar down the road, which had cocktails so sweet and sour at the same time that my tongue didn't know what was happening, but it was good! So I had three, on top of the two drinks at the restaurant and I had to admit that the conversations got more fun after that. I knew Chris had taken me with him because I was sociable and... I guess entertaining? Not the reasons I wanted to be given opportunities, but why not take them anyway.
On my way to get more drinks, I suddenly stood next to Namjoon at the bar, who had had the same idea. Eyeing what he had ordered I stood there for a second, before not being able to keep my mouth shut. "How was that?" "Hm?" "Your drink. It's very red." "Good." "Looks good." "Come taste it then."
Almost in shock, I looked up, my eyebrows raised. Excuse me? He was hard to read, especially because it was quite dark here. But before I could analyze more words seemed to slip over my lips.
"I might." Now he was looking at me in surprise. The weirdest part was that my words didn't seem to match my expression, looking at him in a mix of surprise and anger. "Oh, will you now?" It was like we were in a staring contest, very mature stuff. "Well, I might." "You already said that." "I might actually say it a third time if it pleases me." "Wow. Witty as fuck, hm?" "Well, I might." "There you go." "Here are your drinks." A slightly disturbed waitress suddenly said right next to my face and pushed some glasses between us. Maybe she wanted to get away as quickly as possible. I grabbed as much as I could and figured he would take the rest, stepping away.
"I can't help that I am really hot." I suddenly heard him calling after me and I quickly turned around, almost spilling a G&T over myself. My face seemed to amuse him. And I almost jumped at the provocative sparkle in his eyes. Cause that was what he was doing, provoking a reaction from me, right? Pah. I was a grown-up. Professional and completely over what had happened with Tae. (Right...) So I just turned around, sat down at our table and drank half a glass of Whisky in one go. "That is great." Chris said when he also took a sip from his lilac drink. "What is that? Do you want to try? Anyone want to have a taste?" I almost choked again, this time not from laughing, more surprised, for a second not sure whether he had maybe heard us, but there was no way. Namjoon had sat down next to us again and I could feel his eyes on me, so I turned around and looked straight at him when I said "Well, I might." and took the glass from Chris. I could have sworn I saw the corners of Namjoon's lips twitch at least. Made me really impressed with myself, while I probably should have felt like an idiot, even more of an idiot, both of us really.
When we walked out of the bar, much later, Namjoon was on the phone again - eye roll emoji - so Chris got on the phone as well and we stood there like idiots, me thinking about how it didn't matter much when it came to me, I just wanted to thank them for dinner properly before I left, but the gallerist was in the same position and that seemed somewhat unprofessional, at least Christ could have waited with his call. Who was he talking to at 2 AM that was so important anyway. I must have been staring at Chris a little angry because the gallerist started chuckling. "It's fine. Interesting evening. Especially watching Mr Kim side-eyeing you the whole time." I felt my cheeks blush. Shit. "Yes, Uhm, we have had some miscommunications recently, he doesn't actually hate me as much as it looks." I lied. "Miscommunications. That's what they call it these days..." Fuck. Wait. What? I looked at the gallerist - why was I so tipsy? Why could I for the life of me not remember his damn name all night? - with question marks in my eyes. "Come on. You must have noticed his looks." A smug smile appeared on my lips. Oh. "After all you are copying them really well." Smile disappeared again. I was still not happy about Namjoon knowing I thought he was hot but I had no problem to at least take this strangers word for granted and make us even. Maybe I should just get my facial expressions under control more.
Gallerist dude said his goodbyes to me kissing each of my cheeks - because we were clearly in Europe...not - and so Chris copied, which was just odd because we usually didn't even shake hands, and when Namjoon still just begrudgingly offered me his hand I just showed my most evil grin, got on tiptoes to peck his cheek, which made him freeze so I chuckled in his ear and man he looked pretty when he was pissed off. This time I was the one walking away.
"You. Are. just... such a brat." Yoongi murmured because he was tired after I had told him everything when I had gotten home. Well, a version of the night's event that made me look much cooler of course, but he saw through that. "Go jump his bones already and leave me alone." "Well, I might." That answer surprised even me a little, I had mainly said it to repeat the joke. Yoongi raised an eyebrow. "Well, there you go. Problem solved. "Uh, no, I was kidding. Of course not." "Of course not... whatever. Good Night." "Night," I said and turned around. "I might." I thought to myself.
When I was laying in bed, for some reason the image of my finger on Namjoon's lower lip after he had had a fruity cocktail in my head, I was almost ready to rummage around in my bedside table to find my vibrator. But when I couldn't find it right away I slammed the drawer shut, muttering a upset "He doesn't deserve it." to myself. As a punishment, I fell asleep drunk, horny and very much confused.