The old World
Part Two: Where did you go?
Chapter Three: "Deal [854]"
- Year 743 - The sealing of the Walls
The small boy held his mother's hand. "Don't you dare let go!" She said. "I can afford to lose you in this crowd." She was firm with the boy.
They were walking in, with thousands of people, into the new Paradise enclosure. The King promised he would keep all his people safe there. They small boy had just turned four years old, he didn't enjoy walking very much, specially around so many people. He was feeling tired and lost, he gripped on his mother's hand. She promised him they would be happy there. They were going to see his father again. He thought about it and gripped something else harder, something he held on his other hand, it shimmered for a moment, and he hid the small present deeper inside his grasp. His mother would take it from him. She would say he would lose it. But he would never lose it. He would show it to his father, so his father could be proud.
He was happy with the thought, he smiled at his mother, but she looked worried. They were already inside as the last Wall started closing in. Hundreds of immense creatures locking hands together and disappearing into a curtain of dark grey crystal.
The boy looked up to his mother again, she shed a small tear. Her heart was broken. She shouldn't have lied to her son.
.
.
.
"She can't hear you."
- Year 854 - "The Void"
Armin was staring at her, in his mind he was shouting her name. "Mikasa! Mikasa! Mikasa-" She couldn't hear him. He couldn't move either, what was happening? What was the curse in that forsaken place? Something felt ominous and eerie, foggy… There was something else he was supposed to do… something else that he should be concerned, a more pressing matter… "What was it again?" Well he didn't care, he need to reach her, that was more important. He kept trying to move closer, he kept shouting, even though there was no audible sound on his mouth or forward movement on his legs.
"They are going to eat you." That voice again, that was the only thing Armin could hear in that void.
Mikasa was happy. For some reason, she felt at peace in that place. She sat there, in the sand, under a small tree. She was looking at something, a clear pool it seems, very clear waters, it perfectly reflected the starry night.
"You are wasting your time. Do you want to join her? Because you are very close to-" The voice warned him again.
Armin opened his eyes. He was back at Fort Salta. His friends were fighting for their lives, his titan was still recuperating from the blow, it seems Eren had transformed again, but Armin couldn't find his new titan form. All his friends were struggling, it was desperate, he was struggling too. He was surrounded by the pure colossals, they were trying to eat him. They all seemed to have difficulty moving and weren't hard for Armin to kill, even in the state that his titan form was, but what was he thinking? He could have died, he need to protect his friends. He realised the colossals were acting on their own now, they stopped marching, "must be the amount of shifters in one place" Armin thought. But why wasn't Eren controlling them anymore, that was the mystery. "Maybe Eren lost control after Zeke was killed." Armin was trying to understand what had happened. Everything was a mess, abnormal and mindless.
"There's no point on fighting those monsters, I rather stay here, I will die a horrible death and so will my good friends, and so did my wife. We took our shot, did what we could to prevent the end. It was a meaningless effort it seems-" Armin laughed for a second. "But I'm proud to die fighting. It would be cowardly of me if I had given up before, I did all I could, if even only one person survives after this massacre because of my defending, I will take it. My work here is done. I can go now." Armin told the voice that was speaking to him before. He turned to look at it.
She was a beautiful woman.
"I thought you were a child, but this place seems to be timeless, it feels like a dream…. Bravo! You have some amazing tricks!" Armin clapped his hands ironically and condescendingly. He was angry. But he was pleased to finally meet the true monster behind all this destruction.
The woman didn't respond she was looking at Mikasa undecidedly.
"Why can't I reach her?" Armin asked, he was upset.
"You know why." Ymir responded.
"Then I will join her soon." He came to terms with it.
"That's it? Are you just going to give up now? No clever plan, no last minute solution? That's not the Armin I know." She was teasing him, he could tell.
"I've made my decision." He was walking towards Mikasa.
"All for a woman, that's so pathetic." She wasn't done yet, "She doesn't even love you, but I'm sure you know that." She didn't hesitate- "Do you want to know what she was doing when she died? And how she died?" Ymir was laughing now. "I was there, I can tell you." She was hoping to hurt Armin as much as she could, he was trying to understand why.
Armin didn't take the bait, he knew how to deal with devils, he himself was one. He gave her a strong look, he was measuring her words, staring down her soul, letting her speak, looking for her motivation. "In moments like this you should let them talk. Until they strangle themselves." He thought. "What was her play?"
She kept talking:
"It's effortless, all the energy you spend, it bores me, watching from up here. No matter how much you try to make it work, She will always love Eren more than she loves you. You will always come in second. She told you, 'you were her first love' but you know it's not true. Why bother so much with this? It's just ridiculous-" She was still going but Armin wasn't looking at her, he was looking at his wife again, she was smiling, she was so happy. Armin interrupted the woman's speech.
"I know I will always come in second." She wasn't expecting him to respond like that.
"Her love for me and her love for Eren are very different, I know that too." He felt comfort in Mikasa's joy in that moment.
"I don't know what your game is here, but if you can see and know everything like you said, then you know who I actually come second to, in Mikasa's heart." He smiled. "And I don't mind that." He looked at Ymir, she looked down, at the sand. She knew where he was getting at.
"I can see what she sees on that pond." He finished his argument.
Mikasa was staring at this illusion, reflected in the pond. She could see a small boy running in the beach, he was showing her every little thing on his sight. Because that's how children are, they see a wonder in the world, that adults forget. He was pointing at the sun, the waves, the small creatures, the sand. It was perhaps a memory, or a clash of memories Mikasa made for herself. That's how she saw her child. It made her the happiest she's ever been.
"That's just an illusion." Ymir gestured with her hand, as witches do. The image changed. It was reality now.
"Why would you do that?" Armin snapped back at her. He hated anyone trying to hurt his love. Ymir knew that.
Mikasa was crying now, she could finally see reality, she saw Azzy crying at the orphanage, she shouldn't have left him there. He was all alone, crying for her to comeback. She finally realised she was dead, she would never see her son again. The pain was too much. She held her hands up her head in between her hair. She had her head down her knees. She was shaking her head intensely, side to side, "No! No! No! No! No! No! No! N-" She said, over and over again.
"STOP IT!" Armin shouted at Ymir. "Or what?" She answered defiantly. "At least- At least let me go there." He was desperate.
"Isn't it better to see things as they are? Or do you prefer to live an illusion?" She asked.
Mikasa stopped. She slowly laid down next to the poll, she extended her arm towards the water, she was trying to reach and touch Azzy's pinky cheeks, he loved when she pinched his cheeks and tickled behind his ear, it made him giggle. It was the best sound in the world for her. One tear was slowly walking down her face and reaching the sand. She was transfixed.
"See? At one time or another, we all come to terms with our sins, our fate, and become part of this place. It's better than pretend throughout all eternity, don't you think?" Ymir asked, Armin wasn't paying attention, his family was more important than the witch's taunting. And there was something else, he could see his son clearly, the boy was quieter now, he was calm. It's almost as if he could sense his mother there, with him. The boy was playing with a couple of small 'plane' models, they were supposed to be a part of Armin's flying-ship studies, but after he used those models to explain to the boy how those machines could make people fly high up in the sky, Azzy wouldn't let go of them, so Armin let him keep the priceless things, they were his favourite toys now. Mikasa was going through all those precious memories, their tranquil life, near the ocean, all those days. She would do anything to have them back.
"How can you sense her, Azzy…?" Armin wondered.
"How does this place work?" He looked up the stars, then look down at Ymir again.
"You are just a visitor." Ymir answered. "You can only become one with the stars once your soul joins us, completely. When you no longer have your physical form." She looked at that bright light right in the center of everything. "Once you die, you will be here forever."
"If you can control Illusions, why make a mother suffer? Do you get enjoyment out of that? Is it the same enjoyment you get seeing children trampled to death by your monsters? How sick of a person can someone be?" Armin was trying to be more calm, but it wasn't working, he was too angry.
"They are not my monsters." She affirmed, "They are your monsters. And you know that very well, it's your blood that makes them what they are." She seemed very certain about her statement. Armin was trying to understand what she was proclaiming, maybe she was just crazy.
"You are The Founder. You are the one controlling this place. You are the one who is torturing Mikasa. You are the one who killed her-" He was getting increasingly upset when Ymir cut him off-
"She killed herself. You are all doing that, it seems it wasn't obvious enough, that none of you had a chance from the start. I gave you an out, the Island is safe, but you all wanted to be heroes. You are all getting what you deserve." She snapped back at him.
"So is that how it works? Zeke and Eren are out of commission so I'm the next best thing? Is that what you mean by 'your blood'? I don't care what you have in mind. I won't be your puppet, I'm not like them. Go look for some other idiot."
For what Armin could tell, Ymir needed a holder to maintain her contact with her rumbling, her souls talk made him realise she was looking for a physical body, that was probably the reason she seemed desperate trying to convince him not to die. Maybe if he could get her talking he could get even more information out. It was a difficult task, at that moment he was building barricades with the dead colossals he had killed so far, staking piles of steaming disintegrating flesh to slow down the thousands of others trying to reach him, and at the same time another small barrier to prevent the poor recently converted pure titans to reach his other friends, they were trying to help, but they could only hold for so long.
"Those two-" Ymir sighed, annoyed. "What a pair." She let it out. "They deserve each other, honestly you wouldn't want to know the annoyance I had to put up with, specially the old blonde one. What a tool. But that's family, for you, right? You can't choose them, as they say. I feel sorry for the younger one, he is such a lost child." She turned to look at the light again.
"Yeah family, right?" Armin was trying to play the game.
"I'm sorry about your mother." She said, quietly, looking up the light.
Armin felt confused. He was looking for the right words to say, everything and everyone was depending one it.
"Why do you want to use me, I don't understand." He decided to take a more sincere approach, maybe he could reach her that way. "You said something about blood- but I'm not sure how to make sense of any of that."
"How much do you know about your family, your titan, your history?" She was also been more sincere now, and more understanding, maybe she wasn't all evil.
"You should know more that you apparently do, maybe you are having trouble with your memories, or maybe you don't want to see them." She continued.
Memories. Armin looked at Mikasa again, under the small tree, laying beside that pond reliving the short happy life they had. There were things that terrified his mind, dreams, ever since he became a shifter, he kept them to himself. He never told anyone, not even her.
"I can help you win, but you need to reach those memories to know how." She offered.
That was confusing, why would she be on his side now? "It doesn't make sense." He thought.
"That was the first thing I did. Why would you think I wouldn't try to control these things? I can't, they might be a part of me, like you said. I can definitely feel that. But they aren't under my command, otherwise, I would have stopped this before it even started it." He stated.
Ymir let out a small laugh. "Of course you can't-" She said, "you need a founder for that." She continued- "But there's one thing you can do." Ymir told him.
- Year 867 - In the middle of the ocean:
Levi jumped into the small boat, it was the middle of the night, no one noticed the boat so close to the big ship, it was the perfect plan, it was sad to see it fail. Onyan was confused. The boy should be with Levi. He was counting on it.
"What happened?" He looked up the big ship. "Where's the boy? Why isn't he coming down?" Onyan asked the boy's uncle.
"I'm on my own, he's not coming." Levi answered shuffling around the boats equipment.
"What do you mean not coming? Are you out of your mind? Do you have any idea how much work we had to put on this mission? Everything is at stake here." He quietly shouted at Levi.
Levi grabbed him up by the collar.
"You don't even know the half of it! There's a lot more at stake here than your own stupid world alliance plans. He was taken from me and we need to find him, he is in serious danger. Now, I'm assuming there's some sort of way to contact the others on this thing?" Levi needed help, urgently.
"Yes-" Onyan was proud of his equipment. "Push that button and you can talk with the whole resistance, it's been quite helpful, it was just what we needed-"
Levi interrupted him, he had no time for that crappy conversation.
"And I'm also assuming no one in Paradise can hear us or track us?" Levi asked.
"Nope. It's all under the radar." Onyankopon answered.
Levi continued:
"Good, now call the cavalry. We need all the help we can get. I'll tell them to meet us. We are getting Azzy back, no matter what it takes."
- Year 854 - At the last Battle - in Fort Salta
She could be tricking him, but Armin had to make a decision, at this point it was either that or dying and taking his good friends with him. If he took the deal at least he could avoid the death of his friends, but he would never see his son again, on the off chance that he survived this he could raise Azzy, he had no idea how to do that without Mikasa. "Off chance", He thought. As if he could actually battle thousands of Colossal that wanted to eat him. That was impossible. It was a gamble, and he knew it could all be a trick but at that point maybe he wanted to be tricked.
"I will you play your game." Armin thought.
"I agree." He said. "But I have three demands." He continued- "I want to be with my wife here, for all eternity as you said, even if I'm not completely dead. I want you to release my friends from the torture you put them under. Let them be human again, and live their full lives. All of them. And for last, I need you to promise me that this is the end, those monsters will never cause destruction again, that you will leave the earth in peace and never try anything remotely similar."
"I can fulfil two of your wishes, yes I can grant you a pass to stay here, in exchange for your blood, yes I can make your friends inferior beings again. However, I will never agree to you third offer, I'm just being cautious, you know? One never knows... Maybe I will need some order and decency in a thousand years or so… But don't worry about your time, the harvest is already done, it will take centuries for humans to become a problem again, at least in my experience." She gracefully responded.
Armin had no time to bargain more, the here and now was the priority, he had the rest of eternity to convince Ymir otherwise.
"It's a deal then." Armin confirmed.
She extended her hand in a queenly manner, Armin reached out to hold it, the deal was fulfilled. A bright white light originated from their hands as soon as they came in contact with each other, it blinded the whole dimension.
Reiner was struggling, they all were, but at the moment he was the best defence for Annie and Pieck, Falco was hovering over, Levi was ready. If it got worse he would have to kill one of those pure titans, but he knew them, he couldn't bring himself to do it, but he knew he had to. Onyankopon was watching everything from afar, he was glad those titans had no interest in him, well, glad might be a strong word, at that point he felt they were all in hell anyways. He might as well bleed to death. It was the end.
Armin stopped fighting the beasts, he stayed still for a second. Reiner could see his titan eyes becoming white all of the sudden. Maybe it was just his imagination or the sun playing tricks with his eyes. Armin destroyed the barricade he had built and started to run. They were flabbergasted, no one had any idea what was happening. The tremors and the noise were unbearable as Armin ran and the other colossals followed him. No one ever knew he could do that. Sure, he was more agile than the pure colossals, but not like that. Seeing a sixty meters creature made of muscles and bones running and letting itself be clumsy and slowly chased by other sixty meters creatures made of muscles and bones was a terrifying sight.
Reiner was following Armin's movements, he was trying to understand, and he finally did. Armin was taking a distance, to make sure they wouldn't be trapped inside. He was the only who saw it. As Armin stopped, surrounded by Colossal Titans and slowly started to crystallise his titan form, the dark crystal made it's way all around him, it enveloped every centimeter of flesh that it came in contact with. The pure titans were actually scared of it, even in their small cursed minds they knew what it meant, and they didn't want to stay in that prison for another one hundred years. They were trying to escape but it was effortless. The crystal quickly enveloped them, the more titans it found, the fastest it went. Like it was hungry looking for that flesh. Reiner never told anyone what he saw, at least not completely. "Goodbye, Armin." He thought. "Thank you."
"What just happened." Jean said. He was confused, they all were, but they were all alive. All of them.
Falco landed on Reiner's shoulder, Pieck and Annie joined them, they looked at each other, it seems it was all over. They've finally won. They were the last titans left. Well not quite.
.
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- Year 854 - "The Void"
The void was empty and soundless. Mikasa could hear a hiss in the wind, far away, and the sound of the small waves as she passed her hands through the water. She startled. She could hear footsteps in the sand, coming closer to her. She quickly turned and raised herself up. "Ar-Armin?!" She ran towards him. They held each other. She hugged him very tight just to make sure he was there and he would never go away. They kissed like they did, many times before. Armin had one tear running down his face. He paid a high price for that. But he was content. It was his decision. Mikasa was beside herself- "He was there! He was actually there." She thought happily. But she realised. Mikasa pulled him away. "No." She said.
"No! You can't be here." She was running her hands around his chest, shoulders, his face.
"You can't!" She was in despair. "How-How did it happen?" She said it in a quieter voice, she stared down at the sand. She had her hand over his chest, he reached his hand to interlock with hers, over his heart.
"I'm not actually dead, I think." Armin told Mikasa. "But I am here."
"Why? How?" Mikasa was still in distress.
"I had to be the catalyst, so the Pure Colossals could be petrified again, it had to be me, otherwise the rumbling would never end, they would walk the earth forever." He knew that wasn't an answer Mikasa would like to hear but he had to tell her the truth.
She didn't want to think of Armin forever trapped in an unbreakable stone prison.
"Azzy?" She asked.
"I know." Armin answered. "I'm sorry, but this was the only way."
Mikasa cried on his arms. It was difficult to know for how long, time worked differently in that place, but he could hold her forever.
"It's all my fault." She finally snapped out of it. "What difference did it make? Coming here, leaving Azzy all alone?" She felt guilty. "I thought I could kill Eren. I finally brought myself to do it. And it did nothing! I ended up dying myself. Worthless!" She was angry with her own self.
"It definitely did something..." Armin responded. "I think you broke his link with Ymir, but I'm not sure how yet." He was trying to make something out of the pieces. "I couldn't find him after that, I wonder where he ended up." Armin questioned.
"Well, he's not here. If he was dead, he would be another lost soul in this place. She responded.
"The important thing is that the rumbling is over. People survived it, not many, but humanity is still out there. We played our part in it. Now it's up to the living to tie up loose ends…" Armin considered.
"You are still living." Mikasa pointed out.
"Yes, but I rather be here, in this eternal dream with you than have my conscious out there, and realise I'm trapped inside a wall for the foreseeable future." Armin explained, he was sincere. He didn't want to feel the pain of the living anymore.
"Please, let me stay in your dream I can't bear the thought of life without you, specially now that I chose to be a prisoner." He interlocked his hands with hers again, putting them next to their hearts.
"How can you consider that I would ever let you leave me? You are not going anywhere. Especially now that I can hear you, see you and touch you again." Mikasa told him. And she continued: "I just-" She sighed and looked to the left. "I wish we didn't have to leave him." She went closer to the pond now, to look at their child. "We won't ever see him again and he won't see us." She stated, sadly. "Do you think he'll forget us completely?" She asked. Levi was there now, at the orphanage, like he promised, he was going to take care of their child. They were pleased with it, but jealous of him, he could reach Azzy, they were in the same room, at the same time, in the same dimension. His parents would never know what that was like again.
"I don't think so, not completely." Armin answered Mikasa as he came closer to watch over his son, together with the mother. He held her and looked her in the eye. "He will never forget us, trust me." He assured Mikasa.
The two year old was listening to his uncle and learning he wasn't going back home like he was hoping. Azzy had no idea his parents were watching over him. The two proud and joyous parents would watch him grow up, they were already doing that. They could hear giggles, faint giggles, running through the wind. There it was again. Armin noticed, he felt it was coming closer, and getting louder. The faint giggling wouldn't stop, it seemed Mikasa couldn't hear like he could, or maybe she was too focused on Azzy and the pond. He could hear it, like it was surrounding them.
"C-Can you hear that?" He asked Mikasa worryingly. "I'm not sure.." She looked up at him.
"Who is that?" He was looking behind Mikasa, a little further away. It was difficult to tell but it seemed to be a young girl with bright yellow eyes.
"Who is what?" Mikasa asked as she turned to look. The apparition was gone.
"Nothing… " He was unsure- "It's just-" He wondered, a little perplexed.
He finished the thought:
"It looked like my mother."
End of Chapter Three: "Deal [854]"