"Barriss, do you have any other knives in your room?" asked Luminara, ordering Barriss to take her to her room. Barriss then told her about the knives she had; two and she told Luminara where they were. Luminara put them in her pockets.

"Barriss, I want your lightsaber as well." Even though Barriss had said she wasn't suicidal, Luminara would still feel much better if her padawan didn't have such a deadly weapon with her. Barriss obeyed and handed her lightsaber to her master. Barriss didn't want to give up her lightsaber. It felt like she was giving up a piece of herself.

Sensing Barriss' discomfort from the Force, Luminara put her hand on Barriss' shoulder and said, "Barriss you are not in trouble I will return them when I believe it's safe."

"I understand master," said Barriss.

"Barriss, I'm am going request your Jedi trials be pushed back," said Luminara "Barriss, I thought you were ready. Honestly I still do. But it is clearly causing you too much stress," Luminara continued. Barriss felt like a weight I've been lifted from her shoulders. She tried not to look to happy.

"Barriss, I think you should take today off. Why don't you go into your room and sleep in?" said Luminara. "I'll come collect you for lunch."

"Yes, master." said Barriss. Luminara then remembered what Barriss had said about wanting to spend time with her not related to her training or missions for the Jedi.

" Um, Barriss, I used to like to garden. I was thinking about starting that hobby again. Maybe we could do it together. How does that sound?" asked Luminara.

Barriss smiled and perked up. "I would like it very much, master!" answered Barriss, excitedly.

Luminara looked around to see if anyone else was around. The hallway was empty. "Barriss, you can give me a hug goodbye if you want, " said Luminara. Even though she decided she was okay with Barriss hugging her, Luminara still wasn't 100 percent comfortable with public displays of affection and would have felt awkward if another Jedi have seen the hug.

XXX

Luminara still had some Jedi work for herself. It felt weird not having Barriss follow her around, hanging on her every word and trying to copy her movements.

She saw a fellow Jedi Master. His name was Kit Fisto. He smiled and looked happy to see her. He was an amphibious alien of the Nautolan species. He had light green skin and big black eyes. He also had gills on the side of his neck and instead of hair he had long green tentacles coming out of his head. They kind of reminded Luminara of dreadlocks. He was tall, muscular and had a nice smile. Luminara had heard other people say he was handsome but she personally never saw it. He reminded her too much of frog for her to find him attractive.

"I see your shadow isn't with you today," joked Kit.

"She wasn't feeling well, so I gave her the day off," replied Luminara.

Luminara knews he meant Barriss. She was really like her shadow. Barriss had developed the annoying habit of mimicking Luminara's movements. Whenever they would sit down in the same room, Barriss would sit down with the exact same posture as she did, if she put her arms folded in her lap or put her arms at her side, so did Barriss. If they were drinking tea, she would move the cup to her lips at the exact same time Luminara did.

If she were being honest, she would have to admit that it did annoy her quite a bit. She had decided against counseling Barriss on it and she was glad that she had. Barriss didn't need the added stress right now. Time would resolve this issue. Luminara was sure.

XXX

Barriss was asleep in her room. Her room is fairly bare except for some posters of her species' home planet and a small statue of a Milarain goddess that has holders on its arms that burn incense. Barriss, when she has free time sometimes burns incense and meditates in front of the statue. Barriss heard her door to her room open. She opened her eyes and saw her master.

Barriss sat up . "Yes, Master," she said.

Luminara sat next to her on the bed. "Barriss, did you have any more nightmares?" asked Luminara.

Barriss had. "I had one. It was one I haven't had in a while. I was a youngling and I was looking forward to meeting you, but when I got to the place we were supposed to meet, you weren't there. In the dream, you were my imaginary friend and I didn't realize it until that day. There is no one in the real world who actually liked me and I knew I wouldn't have a master" said Barriss.

Luminara was relieved that Barriss didn't cry, but her Padawan did get a little choked up telling the story of her dream. That's a weird dream thought Luminara. She thought it was really bizarre actually. Was that really one of Barriss' fears that she was a figment of her imagination? Luminara had never in the her life worried that someone she knew might not be real.

Luminara wanted to say something, but Barriss obviously took this dream seriously and she was worried if she said anything it might sound like she was making fun of Barriss bizarre fear.

"Master, do you ever have nightmares" asked Barriss.

"I must of when I was a little girl, but I don't remember any of them. I've been a lucid dreamer since I was 8," answered Luminara.

Of course she was, thought Barriss, hoping that her Master might have had a similar struggle at her age. Not that she wanted her master to have suffered, but if she had, that would have meant that there was hope that Barriss could also recover and be more like Luminara one day. Again, her masters seemed to have been born perfect. What hope did she have of ever being like her?

"Oh," responded Barriss sadly. Luminara began to wonder maybe it would have been better if she lied and told her Padawan she had struggled with nightmares like she did.

"What do you dream about, Master?" asked Barriss.

"Things that I find comfort in like gardening, going to a nice restaurant, and sometimes getting to visit a planet that I liked again, such as The Wookie home world I went once 10 years ago. It was very beautiful," answered Luminara.

"I wish I could have dreams like that," said Barriss, longingly.

"Barriss, lucid dreaming just takes practice. You'll get it eventually," said Luminara, in a gentle voice.

Barriss wanted to shout, "I don't want to practice. I want to be good enough right now." But, she decided to hold her tongue.

After about 30 seconds of silence, Luminara put her hand on Barriss' shoulder. "Let's go have lunch,"she said.

XXX

Barriss and Luminara sat together in the temple lunchroom. Barriss had a plate of vegetarian pasta and Luminara, a spicy kimchi-like meal. Luminara caught sight of Ahsoka. She was sitting by herself with a plate of meat, which mades sense since her species is carnivorous. Ahsoka is a Togtuta. She has orange skin. She has white markings on her face they always reminded Luminara of the tattoos on her own face, except Ahsoka was born with them. Instead of hair, she has three tentacle-like things called montails that are covered in pretty blue and white stripes. Luminara always thought that the Togruta, Ahsoka's alien species, were very beautiful. Ahsoka was no exception to that.

Luminara is not a big fan of Asoka's fashion choices though. Instead of the usual Jedi robes, she wore a small dress and pants. Ashoka claimed this outfit was easier for her to jump and climb in, but the dress is a little to revealing for Luminaria's taste. Culturally, Mirialans tend to believe in modest clothing. Much of the galaxy in the past couple decades seemed to feel differently, however, with female fashions going more towards revealing clothes. Even a few of the Jedi seemed to be taking up this trend . Even though she personally didn't like those choices too much, Luminara thought it was best to let those things go. She's a Jedi master after all, not the fashion police.

Luminara then recalled how Barriss stole a knife from Ahsoka's jewelry making kit. She has tried to instill good manners in her Padawan and thinks now would be a good opportunity for a teachable moment.

"Barriss, I want you to give Ahsoka her knife back. You shouldn't borrow things without asking," said Luminara. "I'll be watching to make sure you do," Luminara added. Luminaria took out the knife and handed it to Barriss.

"Of course, Master" said Barriss. She obediently rose from the table to do what her master asked. Even though she didn't want to.

Barriss had been trying to avoid Asoka these past few months. Even though Ahsoka is only a year and a half younger than her, Barriss likes to think that Ahsoka looks up to her. When her intrusive thoughts became too much to bear, she started cutting. She was worried Ahsoka would discovered her secret. Except for Luminaria, Ahsoka was the last person she wanted to find out about her habit. Even if Ahsoka still wanted to be friends, Barriss feared she wouldn't look up to her anymore.

Barriss stood next to the table where Ahsoka is sitting. Ahsoka hadn't noticed her yet and Barriss was increasingly worried about an awkward conversation. What if she ask why I haven't visited with her after she came back from her Mission with master PLO Koon or why I have her knife thinks Barriss. She very much wanted to walk away before her friend notices her. Barriss snuck a look at her master and as promised Luminara is staring at her expectantly.

Ahsoka finally notices her and she has a big smile on her face develops on her face. Barriss, with difficulty, tries not to stare at Ahsoka's teeth. Ahsoka's teeth are sharper than those of a human and she has two fangs. Allegedly, her species would use the fangs to break the neck of the live rats they would sometimes eat. Barriss thought that sound gross and a little mean, but she was still a little darkly curious to know if Ahsoka had ever eaten a live rat. It seemed to go against Ahsoka's personality and she is such a nice and pretty girl. It was really hard to picture eating a living thing. Barriss had wanted to ask her for a while. but decided not to. Noone likes to hear comments about what they eat, ever. There's not really a polite way to ask, "Do you eat rats?".

Barriss doesn't think she would smile as much as Ahsoka does if she had teeth like her. Barriss was secretly glad that she was from what she considered a normal alien species. Mirialans are pretty much just humans except they have more exotic skin colors like purple, blue, and green. Also, Barriss thinks that Mirialan females age better than human females, but that's just her opinion, it's not like any university ever did a study on that or anything. But, she is secretly glad she doesn't have to deal with extreme physical differences and strange instincts that other alien members of the Jedi Order struggle with.

Ahsoka gets up from her place at the table and gives Barriss a hug. "Barriss, hi, it's so good to see you." Barriss hugs her back. Some of the Jedi in the temple get annoyed with how huggy Ahsoka is. But, Barriss has always liked it. Noone else touches her so affectionately. Before they became friends, Barriss used to rap her arms around herself and imagine what it would be like to be hugged.

Ahsoka had been missing Barriss. She desperately wanted to tell her about the adventure she had with her master. She had gone undercover as a pod racer and as a mechanic. But it had seemed like Barriss didn't want to spend time with her. Master Plo had told her that Barriss was training for her Jedi trials and was just busy. Ahsoka even though she missed her friend tried to respect that. Asoka hoped that was the reason. And, now with Barriss standing before her, maybe Master Pol had been right after all.

They broke the hug and with her master looking over her, Barriss decided that it would be best to get this over with.

"Ahsoka, I found your knife from your jeweler making kit. You dropped it on the floor and I've been meaning to get it back to you," said Barriss, hoping Ahsoka would believe her lie.

"Thanks I've been looking for that," said Ahsoka excitedly as she took the knife out of Barriss hands. Good she believes it thought Barriss relieved.

"Barriss, I've been hoping we could spend some time together if you're not too busy," added Ahsoka hopefully.

Barriss honestly didn't want to spend time with Ahsoka. Barriss felt like she didn't have the energy to pretend to be happy. But she saw the hope in Ahsoka's blue eyes, which reminded her of what her master said, "A jedi should do thing's for others not themselves."

"That would be lovely, Ahsoka" said Barriss.

XXX

After lunch, Barriss asked her master if it was okay if she spent some time with Ahsoka. Luminara allowed her to. Luminara hoped that her Padawan spent time with her best friend it would make her feel better.

While listening to Ahsoka tell of her recent month-long Adventure. Barriss forgot her discomfort and found that she was actually enjoying the story and her time with Asoka quite a bit. Barriss never was much of a pod racer fan or any sport's fan really. But, it sounded so exciting going undercover as a pod racer.

Ahsoka talked about how a fellow teenage pod racer had fallen in love with her. He at first annoyed Ahsoka a lot, but they had been able bond. He would say mushy things like how he thought "She was the most beautiful girl in the galaxy." After the mission, when it was time for Ahsoka to go back to Coruscant he asked if it was okay if he kissed her goodbye. She has let him kiss her on the cheek, but now she wasn't sure that was the right decision Ahsoka wanted Barriss' advice.

Barriss usually liked it when people asked her for advice. It her feel important like a Jedi master. But she felt a little bit of jealousy. It's not that she wanted a boyfriend or anything, she has even written and rehearsed several speeches that she could give to anyone who confessed their love for her. She would tell them that she is flattered that they feel that way about her, but she wasn't able to pursue a relationship, not that there was anything wrong with them, but she had already dedicated herself to a higher purpose.

It seemed silly now since no one had confessed their love to her. Not that it was a big deal but Barriss did feel a little insulted. What does Ahsoka have that I don't, Barriss wondered. Barriss decided to tell Ahsoka that's fine it was probably harmless.