"Law and Order: SVU" and "Law and Order: Organized Crime" are the properties of Dick Wolf and NBC Universal.

Carisi was waiting in the squad room when Fin came back in.

"How'd that go?" he asked sardonically.

Fin shook his head, silently indicating don't ask.

"Good news is Kathy Stabler is conscious," he answered.

"Can she make a statement?" Carisi asked.

"Benson's on her way the hospital," Fin replied.

The ADA gave him a wary look.

"Look, I know you guys all have history," he said. "But she's going to blow this case if something like that happens again. Jacob here, now he's claiming that he was just following some Antifa thug who threw a Molotov cocktail into the car."

Fin looked at him angrily.

"It wasn't a Molotov cocktail," he said.

"And he doesn't know that," Carisi replied. He looked at Fin grimly. "If I had to guess...he's good for the first two. But not Elliot and Kathy Stabler."

Fin called as Olivia was entering the elevator to go up to the trauma wing.

"He's saying all three were Antifa," the sergeant told her. "We know he's good for two of them."

She rubbed her forehead.

"Right," she said. "Molotov cocktails."

He could hear the frustration in her voice.

"Look, he's not going anywhere, Liv, okay?" he said. "We're searching his apartment and his truck."

She arrived at the floor and stepped out.

"Keep me updated," she told him. "I'll see if Kathy is lucid enough to tell me what she remembers."

Olivia hung up and slid the phone into her pocket. Then she walked over to the room she had seen Kathy be wheeled into earlier and gently knocked on the glass.

Kathy looked over and then gestured for her to come inside.

Olivia felt suddenly nervous without knowing exactly why. She walked slowly into the room and stood near the door.

"Hi," she said quietly. "How are you feeling?"

The blonde inhaled wearily.

"Tired," she answered.

They stared at each other for a minute awkwardly. Kathy swallowed.

"I wanted to tell you-" she said. She paused, beginning to sound emotional. "Thank you." She looked at Olivia squarely. "The doctor told me that Elliot was here being treated. Thank you for finding him."

She smiled gratefully as she continued.

"I knew you would. As soon as I saw you, I knew I didn't have to worry anymore. You two...always have been so in sync."

Her attention was momentarily distracted when she tried to shift to a more comfortable position and Olivia was glad for it. A lump had suddenly formed in her throat and she probably wouldn't have been able to speak just then.

"I'm sorry to ruin your big award ceremony," Kathy said.

Olivia cleared her throat and blinked rapidly.

"Oh," she said, with an awkward chuckle. "You did me a favor. I hate making speeches."

Kathy gave her a weak smile. Olivia became mindful of how she might be feeling and tried to divert back to her reason for being there.

"Kathy," she began. "Can we go back to last night?"

The other woman took a slow breath.

"I don't even remember getting in the car," she said.

Olivia spoke gently. "Did you see anything or hear anything? It could...be the smallest detail."

She bit her lip and struggled to think.

"I...dropped my phone," she said after a minute. "It was dark. Elliot said he would go around to the back passenger side to see if he could find it. He...was worried we would be late for your award."

Olivia felt a brief stab in her chest.

Kathy paused for a long moment and then shook her head apologetically.

"I didn't see anything," she said. She began to blink heavily, sounding weary. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Olivia said quickly. "It's fine, Kathy." She began sliding open the glass door. "I'll let you rest."

She took one step out before she suddenly heard the other woman call out weakly after her.

"You really didn't talk for ten years?"

Olivia froze, her pulse suddenly racing, and swallowed hard. She turned back. Kathy was looking at her warily, the suspicion obvious even in her hampered state.

"I didn't even know he was back on the job," she replied.

The other woman didn't reply for a minute.

"That's what Elliot told me," Kathy finally said. "I didn't believe him."

Olivia nodded.

"It's true, Kathy, " she replied softly.

Kathy fixed Olivia her with a disconcerting stare.

"It's been...hard on him," she said quietly. "Since he left. Even though he took the new position with the department and we left the country, he struggles. I feel like a part of him still really misses it."

Olivia didn't know what to say.

"He was good at what he did," she said in agreement.

The other woman looked at her frankly, her words speaking volumes even in her hampered state

"It isn't the job that he's missing, Olivia," she said.

Olivia suddenly knew she had to get out of the room. She felt like she was about to choke. She stammered something about her phone vibrating and rushed into the hallway so fast that she almost stumbled.

She stopped once she was out of sight of Kathy's room and leaned her arm against the glass door outside the empty one next to it, letting herself breathe harshly until she was back in control. She inhaled deeply and straightened, composing herself.

And realized with a start that she was staring into a room that was no longer empty.

Elliot was in the bed inside.

Olivia felt like she couldn't move even as her brain was screaming at her to go. She stood frozen, unable to look away.

He was either asleep or unconscious. He was positioned slightly upright with a bandage wrapped around his head, a brace on his neck, and a sling holding his arm immobile.

As she looked at him, a memory flashed into her head unwittingly.

Another hospital. Another time. Another feeling of horror just like this one.

"Detective Stabler hit his head so hard, his brain bounced off the front and back of his skull."

His face, terrified, as he asked her in a panic where she was.

"I can't see you. I can't see anything!"

She quickly opened her eyes, shaking the memory away-

And found herself unprepared to see Elliot suddenly awake and staring right back at her.

Officer Tamin walked over when she saw her sergeant approaching the garage where the arson unit was searching through Jacob Peter's vehicle.

"Arson get anything?" Fin asked her.

"Maybe," she replied. "They found a cell near a piece of the gas tank. Must have been the trigger."

"DNA?" he pressed. "Prints?"

She shook her head.

"He was pretty thorough," she said. "He used a burner phone. There's nothing on the outside, but maybe they'll get lucky and find prints on the inside of the cell phone case."

"Do they know one of the victims was NYPD?" he asked.

"They do," Kat replied, nodding. "For what it's worth, arson says this doesn't look like Antifa or some other improvised device. It was more sophisticated, so it might be terrorist related."

Fin sighed heavily.

"Stay here and do what you can to help," he told Kat. She nodded.

He began walking back to his car, taking out his phone to text Olivia. If what arson believed was true, he was going to have to get her up to speed on some things.

He just hoped she wouldn't get too upset with him once he told her.

Her heart thudded. She considered bolting and pretending she hadn't seen him awake. He looked as if he couldn't believe she was standing there.

For one brief, callous moment, she wanted him to feel what she had.

She wanted him to watch her leave and know he couldn't do anything about it. She wanted to make him feel that betrayal, that hurt, of her walking away from him the way he had done to her. She had every right.

But she couldn't bring herself to do it. His face began to take on a desperate twist as if silently begging her to come closer and it was horrifying.

So, despite herself, she hesitantly slid open the door and came inside.

He looked even worse close up. There was a large butterfly bandage cutting across his left eyebrow, right under the gauze wrapping his forehead. He couldn't move his head with the neck brace and seemed to be struggling to find an angle to rest his arm that wouldn't hurt his shoulder.

He seemed a lifetime away from the confident, strong man she remembered and she didn't know how to feel about it.

"You came," he said.

Despite his appearance and all that it brought up in her, it steadied her somewhat to realize his voice still calmed her.

Still, it felt strange. She could only nod.

He seemed nervous as he looked at her. She couldn't remember ever seeing him act that way before.

The silence grew heavy and stifling, neither of them seeming to know how to proceed.

"I'm not staying," she finally said. Her tone was stiffer than she had intended and she saw a flash of hurt on his face. "I just...wanted to make sure you were alright."

It wasn't technically a lie. She turned quickly to go back out, but not before seeing a tormented look take over his face.

"I'm sorry," he burst out.

She stopped short and clenched her fist, trying to will herself to keep going.

"Liv, I'm sorry."

He sounded gutted. Olivia grit her teeth and spun around.

She shook her head, automatically closing off.

"Elliot," she said without emotion. "Don't-"

She paused, seeing him looking like he was silently begging her not to rage at him.

"You really want to do this now?' she said challengingly.

She stared at him coldly and shook her head.

"Fine," she said, finally coming closer. Her eyebrows were set stonily. "Are you sorry for leaving? Or are you sorry for walking-"

Her voice broke abruptly, horrifying both of them.

"For not giving me the courtesy of telling me?" she continued.

Elliot swallowed and looked to be holding back tears. Olivia was momentarily stunned, not expecting it, and stopped talking.

"Both," he choked.

He looked scared to continue. She stared at him, feeling herself wanting to cry and trying not to.

"I think," he went on quietly. He tried to find the words. "I thought if I talked to you about how..."

"You walked away?" she finished harshly. He blinked wetly, struggling to stay composed. "Because that's what you did, Elliot. I had to-"

She shook her head slightly. The hurt was obvious.

"I had to find out from Cragen."

"Olivia-" he attempted to say shakily.

She inhaled unsteadily, trying to breathe through the sudden anger. She was helpless to stop it once she had let herself finally feel it.

"Elliot," she ground out, almost over top of him. "You were the most..." The feelings were electric, practically close enough to touch. "Single most important person in my life."

"Olivia-" he tried again.

She was almost shaking.

"And you just..." Her voice became a whisper. "Disappeared."

He was almost crying and that just made it worse. She ducked her head, knowing she was going to break any minute.

"I know," he said thickly. His voice was trembling. "I was afraid..."

It was so unlike him to say those words that it actually made her head shoot back up. She stared at him and realized then just how much pain he was holding inside.

"If I heard your voice," he whispered in anguish. "I...wouldn't have been able to leave."

Her phone chimed. She used the interruption as an excuse to back away.

It was a message from Fin, asking her to meet him. She responded rapidly.

"I've got to go," she said, stepping toward the door.

He looked at her hesitantly and she paused, sucking on her lip.

"I'll...come back," she added quietly.

"Olivia."

He called out to her as she was stepping out. She stopped and half-turned.

"Wait," he said. He was awkwardly trying to gesture beside him. "Can I give you something?" He gazed at her beseechingly. "Please."

She inhaled slowly, raising her eyebrows.

"Over here," he went on. " There's a bag from the hospital with my clothes in it."

Olivia went over and immediately saw the white bag labeled "patient belongings." She looked at him hesitantly before reaching for it.

"In my jacket," he directed as she tentatively picked through it. "The right pocket."

Her fingers brushed over paper and she pulled out a white envelope. Her name was written across the front in handwriting that was still easy to recognize as his.

He gave her an intent gaze when she glanced at him.

"They, uh...asked me to say a few words," he said apprehensively. "At the ceremony." He swallowed, almost stammering. "You know me and public speaking... "

An unwitting smile curled at the end of her lips at the obvious statement that she couldn't deny.

"Anyway, um-" He cleared his throat awkwardly. "I thought this would be better than to say what I was going to say, so..."

He nodded slightly and then winced when his neck reminded him it wasn't smart.

"Take it," he requested softly. "Read it." His eyes reflected uncertainty. "Or, you know, don't read it. Throw it away. Whatever you decide, I understand."

Olivia stared at the envelope, swallowing, and finally just gave a small nod.

He blinked heavily, looking worn out, and she quietly left without saying anything else.

When she got back to the precinct, she didn't see Fin. She went into office to check for any messages.

"Hey."

She looked over and saw Rollins in the doorway.

"You doing okay?" the detective asked.

Olivia thought about giving her a false answer, but the younger woman looked so earnest that she decided against it.

"You know, I've been better," she replied honestly.

Amanda approached the desk.

"You never talked much about Stabler," she ventured hesitantly. "All I know is when I got here, his desk was empty..."

The captain didn't seem offended that she was speaking candidly and Amanda was relieved.

"A shrine," Olivia commented almost fondly, as if she knew what Amanda was trying not to say. "Yeah, he had a pretty big presence in the squad room."

Rollins sat down in one of the chairs.

"I know Nick always felt the brunt of trying to fill his shoes," she said. She eyed her boss carefully. "From what he told me, you and Stabler had a...complicated relationship."

Olivia thought about the envelope she had tucked into her back pocket.

"We did," she agreed quietly, nodding. She looked conflicted. "You know, back then..." She shrugged as if she couldn't explain it. "Nobody looked out for me the way he did."

Rollins considered.

"I get that," she said companionably.

Just then, Fin appeared from the squad room.

"Hey," he said to Olivia. "I think we caught a break. The lab found DNA on the cell."

Olivia raised an eyebrow, silently asking if he still needed to talk, and he nodded. He looked at Amanda.

Rollins understood the unspoken request and got up fast.

"I'll head there," she said.

Fin followed her to the door and then closed it once she left.

"Everything alright?" Olivia asked him, seeing him take the seat that Rollins had vacated.

He regarded her resolutely.

"I feel like I owe you an explanation," he said. She raised her eyebrows. "I knew that Elliot was back on the job. He called me a few months ago to tell me."

That was definitely news to her. Fin and Elliot had never been that friendly, even when working together, and it didn't sound at all like him to just call the other man up for a chat.

Fin could tell where her thoughts were and elaborated.

"He had heard through the department about you being promoted to captain," he explained. "He told me he was going to call you."

"Well, he didn't," she replied shortly.

He hesitated and she had to check herself. It wasn't his fault. She forced herself to simmer.

"What did you two talk about?" she finally asked woodenly.

The sergeant looked at her a bit sympathetically.

"His family," he replied. "What he's been up to-"

The unspoken "you" added in there seemed implied even if he didn't mention it.

"He's been doing private security overseas," he went on. "Then that thing in Rome came out of a terrorism task force he was working on-"

"Fin," she said, her patience trying. She still wasn't emotionally ready for all of what was going on. She sure as hell wasn't ready to compare resumes with the ex-partner that had dropped off of the face of the earth, that was for sure. "Why are you telling me all of this?"

Fin looked at her intently.

"He told he was coming back here to testify at a trial next week, Olivia," he said. "Turns out, Elliot has been working anti-terrorism, sex trafficking, and organized crime. The cell trigger we found for the bomb is common in the Middle East, the Mediterranean region, and North Africa."

Her stomach sank.

"You think Elliot was a target?" she asked.

Fin looked at her grimly as he stood up.

"I don't know," he said. "But it certainly looks like it."

Kat and Amanda met at the forensics lab and went over the findings with the pathologist.

"It wasn't a direct match," the pathologist said, showing them the computerized readout. "But we did a long-range familiar profile search and came up with a close kin result."

He typed in the name and the detectives watched a mug shot appear on the screen.

"Yuri Lenski," Kat read from it. "Currently incarcerated at Green Haven for facilitating illegal gambling."

"How close was the match?" Amanda asked. "A son? Brother?"

The pathologist looked at the two detectives.

"Not likely," he answered. "Probably a nephew, maybe cousin."

Kat looked at Amanda.

"Any idea if Mr. Lenski had any other family members in his line of work?" she asked dryly.

Rollins pulled out her phone to report what they had found out to the sergeant.

Olivia went home that night and tried not to think about the letter. She took it out of her pocket, placed it on her nightstand, and left the room.

But every time she passed by, she would stare at it.

Walking to get Noah a towel after his bath, she stared at it. On her way to turn out the hall light while tucking him into bed, she stared at it. Picking up the shoes that he had left by the front door, she stared at it.

Her name, his handwriting, practically leaping off of the page with how much it stood out and begged for her attention.

She stuffed it in the drawer of the nightstand and climbed into bed, turning out the light.

She lay there for five minutes trying to fall asleep and then cursed.

She shot back up, flipped on the lamp, and grabbed the envelope from the drawer.

Fin, Amanda, and Kat were gathered around Olivia's desk the next morning, listening to Carisi on the speakerphone. He had gone to New Haven Correctional to talk to Yuri Lenski.

"Did he give you anything?" Olivia asked.

"He says he 'doesn't rat on family,'" Carisi said. They could almost hear him rolling his eyes through the phone. "Not the brightest, obviously...his visitors log has records of his wife and two mistresses that visit him three times a week. It won't be hard to find them."

"I'm going back to the hospital later," Olivia told him. "I can ask Elliot if he has any possible connection to Yuri through his overseas work."

"And we'll work on tracking down the wife and mistresses," Fin said. "It shouldn't be too difficult to shake them for information."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you say that," Carisi said.

The phone suddenly beeped, indicating another incoming call, and she saw the number of Mercy Hospital on the screen.

"This might be Elliot now on the other line," she said.

"I'll text Fin the names and addresses as soon as I get them," Carisi replied, quickly hanging up.

She switched over to the other line. It was Elliot, as she'd predicted.

"Liv," he said over the phone.

"Hey," she said.

Amanda spoke to Fin as the three of them were leaving the office, making it difficult for her to understand what Elliot was saying for a minute. She paused a minute and waited until they were out of hearing range.

"Sorry," she said, once the office was quiet. "How is it going?"

"Liv!"

Her heart suddenly stuttered, hearing his voice sounding hysterical in her ear, and she inhaled sharply.

"What's wrong?" she asked in alarm.

He was barely coherent and more frantic than she could ever recall hearing him before.

"Her heart," he gasped out. "Kathy's heart stopped. They rushed her to surgery and there's alarms going off and no one will tell me what's going on, I can't get them to tell me anything!"

He was almost sobbing.

"Please, Liv," he pleaded. "Please, I-"

She didn't stop to think. She answered immediately.

"I'm coming," she said quickly. "I'm on my way, Elliot."

Olivia pushed away from her desk and ran out of the squad room, not stopping to acknowledge the detectives gaping at her as she rushed to the elevator.

Elliot looked like he was close to having a panic attack when she hurried into his hospital room. He looked at her in despair.

"What happened, Elliot?" she asked in concern.

He blew out several whooping breaths and tried to calm down enough to talk to her. She was able to piece together that Kathy had gone into cardiac arrest without warning and he had heard the doctors trying to shock her heart, but they hadn't had time to respond to him asking what was going on as they had rushed with her past his room.

He was close to tears when he finished and she swallowed hard.

"Okay," she said as soothingly as she could, holding her palms out toward him in an effort to placate him. "Take it easy. I'll see what I can find out, alright?"

He looked at her in profound relief, like she had just told him she was going to single-handedly save his world.

"Yeah," he said, almost stuttering. "Okay. That might be good, yeah. Okay. "

He breathed out much easier than he had been previously. She bit her lip and walked out to the nurses station down the hall.

"Excuse me," she said as she approached. "Is it possible for Detective Stabler to get an update on his wife's condition?"

The nurse looked at her.

"Someone will come talk to him as soon as they can," the woman replied.

Olivia clenched her jaw and returned to Elliot. He looked at her with hopeful yet frightened eyes.

She couldn't bear to upset him further.

"Someone should be in soon," she said. She tried her best to reassure him. "I'm sure she's going to be fine, Elliot. She's a fighter, you know that."

They waited in silence for about a half hour until Olivia caught a glimpse of a doctor approaching in scrubs. From his position, Elliot couldn't see him coming.

The look she saw on the man's face made her blood freeze in shock.

No.

Oh, God. No.

Elliot noticed her suddenly straighten in his periphery and almost unconsciously move closer to his side with an odd look on her face.

Before he could question her on it, his attention was drawn to the door opening. A doctor stepped in.

Elliot looked at him urgently.

"How is she?" he asked immediately. "How is my wife?"

The doctor paused.

Olivia took a deep breath, dreadfully preparing herself. Her hand dropped onto the bed rail near his without thinking about it.

"We did all we could," he said softly. "Unfortunately, there was too much damage to the heart by the time we were able to attempt to revive her."

Her eyes began to sting and she swallowed as quietly as she could.

"Mr. Stabler," the doctor went on gently. "I am very sorry. Your wife has died."

There was a moment of complete silence.

When he finally spoke, Elliot sounded confused.

"What?" he asked. He paused. "I...just saw her. What are you-?"

He furrowed his brow deeply and then let out an angry scoff.

"Do you think this is a joke?" he went on harshly. "I don't know what kind of person...do you not know who my wife is? Can't you tell when you have the wrong room?"

He shouted suddenly, startling her. He was shaking and didn't seem to know it.

The doctor bore the outburst patiently, looking sorrowful.

"No, Mr. Stabler," he said gently. "I know who your wife is. I'm sorry. She didn't make it. I'm sorry."

He looked at Olivia, clearly asking her to help. She swallowed and nodded slightly.

She moved into Elliot's line of sight.

"El," she said thickly.

"Get out of here," Elliot suddenly snapped at the doctor. "Get-"

He looked at Olivia suddenly, startling her with the rage on his face.

"Liv, get him out of here," he growled. "Get him out of here."

She started to speak gently. His face crumpled and he interrupted her, yelling furiously.

"GET OUT! GET OUT OF HERE!"

His voice was breaking even as he screamed and Olivia felt like her heart had been ripped from her chest.

She gestured at the doctor to go, nodding apologetically. The doctor pursed his lips empathatically and quietly stepped out.

"He's gone, Elliot," she said quietly.

He had his eyes squeezed shut, breathing hard.

"He's wrong," he said.

He looked at her pleadingly.

"He's wrong," he repeated. His voice wavered. "Isn't he, Liv?"

His strength began to crack and his words choked with tears.

"Isn't he?"

He collapsed into sobs before he could finish the sentence, barely able to take a full breath. He looked like he was trying to shakily reach for her but couldn't because of his injuries.

Olivia struggled to keep her own emotions in. She leaned down as carefully as she could, trying not to hurt him, and felt his functioning arm slip instantly around her neck.

"I've got you," she murmured painfully. "I promise, I've got you."

His fingers fumbled into her hair slightly as he wept against her, like a child trying to squeeze a comforting toy, and that was what finally undid her. Olivia blinked rapidly as hot tears slid down her face.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered, gently squeezing his back.

She held on as much as she could, her face twisting as she listened to him gasping in breaths.

"I'm so sorry."