Hey everybody,

and appearently it's Saturday again^^'
I hope you had a great week. I'll be honest with you guys, mine was not, it actually was freaking bad (warning, I will be oversharing, so you can just skip to the chapter if you like ;-)), because a lot of things happened that kind of messed up some big parts of my life and I'm not sure yet how to figure that out. So right now I'm a little bit struggling with real life and all I actually wanna do is write stuff and go on walks with my dog (which is actually not a good idea, because nobody ever trains her on the leash when I'm not at my parents' place, so it's like going on a walk with a wild polar bear, who's afraid of other people, dogs, and mice), but I guess that's just how life is sometimes, right?
Sorry for the whining, I will stop now ;-)
You guys really saved my week with all your great comments, and I'm really grateful to see that so many of you are interested in this story, you're in for some journey, so let's get going!

See you next weekend ^^

Chapter 2

-Sanji-

"Carefully. Carefully! Luffy, don't touch him!"

Chopper's serious, determined, yet calm voice was the only thing that prevented him from losing his mind. It had taken him forever to get down from the mountain. At least it felt like that, but it probably had been less than five minutes.

Luffy had grabbed Chopper and jumped down the hillside, holding onto a tree to not end up like their swordsman. They had been followed by Brook, who due to his light weight had almost looked like he had been floating.

The rest of them lacked some special ability and after Sanji had just swiftly splinted Robin's broken arm they had no other choice but to run down the mountain by foot, taking something that felt like minutes.

Finally Sanji had reached the others, staring at this picture of horror.

Zoro lay on the ground, pale like a corpse, framed by his own blood, slowly seeping into the ground. Arms and legs were stretched out in all directions. But even though stones and grass were soaked in blood, the swordsman looked peaceful, not a scratch adorned his face. His shirt, which had already begun to turn pink on the sides, was still completely intact, except for a missing button, but maybe it already had been gone before. Only a few inches above the last strands of moss-green hair was a large, flat stone, single drops of blood scaring it.

The swords must have fallen out of the haramaki during the fall or one of the others had taken them away, in any case Luffy was holding onto them right now and had nudged his swordsman once or twice with the tip of the white sword. But Zoro did not react, Sanji was not even sure if he was still breathing.

"What can we do?" He asked, surprised how calm he sounded, how steady his voice was, while his hands were shaking. Was he feeling cold?

"Is he still alive?" Nami's voice on the other side was nothing more than a whisper.

"Yes," Chopper replied briefly, without looking up, "he got a pulse. But we must not move him more than necessary. After such a fall, the probability of a broken neck is quite high."

"But we are talking about Zoro, such a small fall can't be that bad. I'm sure he's just..."

"I said don't touch!" Chopper snarled, his otherwise sweet beady eyes staring Luffy down ice cold. "I'm telling you, Luffy, I have no clue how bad it is. That Zoro is still alive is a damn good sign, but that he is unconscious is just as bad. He shouldn't be unconscious, not because of something like this, unless something is wrong. I hope Brook hurries with the stretcher, but it may be that any help is already too late."

Sanji forgot to breathe while Luffy took a step back. Only now did he seem to understand how bad things looked.

"What does that mean?" Luffy asked, in a tone Sanji didn't want to hear, a tone that made it even harder for him to breathe.

"This means that he most likely has severe fractures, possibly unstable vertebral or rib fractures, which could easily injure organs due to the slightest movement. His lungs or heart could be punctured, his spinal cord could be damaged. He may already have brain damage. Any slight movement could kill him. And even if we do everything just right, he still may be permanently incapacitated or even die from already existing injuries."

"But... but we're talking about Zoro," Luffy whispered in disbelief, as if none of this could be possible.

"I know." Now Chopper's voice trembled for the first time and this was the moment Sanji realized that this was not some doctor talking about some patient, this was Chopper talking about Zoro and things were freaking serious. "Believe me, I know that. Zoro, of all people. How the hell could this happen?"

For a moment, Sanji thought Chopper was asking him.

Brook and Franky emerged in the distance, the stretcher between them. Helpless, stunned, Sanji stood among his friends, all of them talking, some yelling, some whispering.

Yes, how could something like this happen?

Zoro, Roronoa Zoro, feared pirate and outstanding swordsman, couldn't be stopped by something like this, right? How could a ridiculous spill off a cliff succeed in what hundreds of warriors could not? It didn't make any sense; it didn't make any sense at all.

"We have to move him very carefully onto the stretcher. Sanji, Brook, help me."

The doctor mutated into his giant form and looked at him as the skeleton was already squatting.

In the background, Sanji could hear Nami breathing sharply, as if she were fighting tears. Robin had placed her healthy arm around Nami's shoulders, looking just as pale. It was just impossible. It had to be a dream, something like this couldn't happen, not to Zoro. Not the guy who could lift an entire house, not the guy who had stood his ground against the CP9, not the guy even Bartholomew Bear couldn't kill. It couldn't be, it had to be a dream, a nightmare.

Luffy stood next to him in disbelief, as if he couldn't comprehend what Chopper had just said, as if he was just as convinced as Sanji that this could be nothing else than some dream, some stupid nightmare.

"Sanji!" Chopper called.

Surprised, Sanji stared at the other, only now realizing what Chopper had asked him to do.

"Oh yes, of course."

It took something that felt like an eternity for them to put Zoro on the stretcher, carefully monitoring the slightest movement. Blood slid between Sanji's hands, yet it was far less than he had expected, but he didn't know if that was good. It took them almost even longer to transport him back to the ship. Again, every step had to be calm and fluid, no jerking, no sudden movement. Like a funeral march, the rest of the crew followed. Only Chopper's unusually hard and commanding voice could be heard.

Eventually, they made it on board.

Chopper asked him for help because Robin was injured, but he couldn't. His hands trembled, they had trembled all the time. He needed nicotine.

What if Zoro would die?

To everyone's surprise, Usopp offered to help out and hurriedly followed Chopper into the sickbay. Nami, meanwhile, took care of Robin's broken arm. Franky sat opposite the two women at the table, Brook joined him with a tray of tea and coffee. Luffy sat outside on the figurehead, he had not wanted to come inside, and even Nami had given up on convincing him. No one knew what he was thinking.

With his fingers still trembling, Sanji hurriedly prepared some sandwiches after scrubbing his bloody hands for minutes. He couldn't do more than that at the moment. But when he put the food on the table, he was not surprised that none of them ate.

They sat at the table late into the night, at some point Robin went outside. Several minutes later, she returned with Luffy, who was unusually silent.

It was not the first time their swordsman was in a bad shape. It wasn't the first time he was injured and not the first time he was unconscious.

But somehow it was still different this time. It hadn't been a fight; it hadn't been a moment of risking one's life. They had enjoyed some peace and quiet, had wanted to spend some free time together, some easygoing hours, far away from the Marines and other pirates. But from one second to the next, this rare bliss had just disappeared.

Could Zoro really be in such a bad shape? Why did Chopper and Usopp take so long?

Sanji lit another cigarette, while his fingers slowly calmed down. He didn't know why he was so upset. He had already seen Zoro in worse situations, hadn't he? Just thinking about Thriller Bark, it couldn't be worse, right?

And it wasn't his fault, Sanji knew that. It had been an accident. None of them could have expected the ground under Zoro's feet to simply give way. It was nothing more than a terrible accident.

But he remembered that little voice.

What if it hadn't been an accident? Could it be that he had done it on purpose? Could he really do something this horrible? Could he really do something this horrible to a friend?

It wasn't until the early hours of the next morning that Chopper finally came out of the sickbay.

They all stared at him expectantly.

Exhausted, he dropped on the sofa. But then he nodded.

"It's not as bad as feared. His whole back is bruised and injured, but there are no deep wounds. He was lucky."

A relieved breath went through the room.

"That means he's going to make it?" Nami asked tentatively.

Chopper nodded. "If nothing unexpected happens, definitely. The injuries are relatively superficial, and his organs have not been adversely affected. Unfortunately, disinfecting his wounds took forever, causing him to lose a relatively large amount of blood, but it's not like that's unusual for him."

"So why were you so upset, everything sounds really good, right?" Franky's objection was justified.

"He's still unconscious. That's why I expected him to have a skull fracture or that one of the neck vertebrae would be broken, which fortunately isn't the case. But it is very unusual for him to be unconscious even though the injuries do not seem so serious, and that worries me. But whether I'm worried for a reason or not we will not know until he wakes up. After such a fall, it would be a real miracle if he got away with just those bruises."

"Well, on the other hand it's Zoro. I'm more surprised that he's hurt at all."

"And where is Usopp?"

"He wanted to stay with him in case he wakes up. But he's pretty done, too."

For a moment, they all sat there, silently. Then Luffy got up and went to the sickbay. A few seconds later, Usopp returned. He seemed just as tired and exhausted as they all felt.

They should all go to sleep; they should all be happy that everything had gone well. But none of them left.

Chopper insisted on taking a look at Robin's arm and Franky took over the night watch. Sanji followed him outside into the still lingering darkness and lit a cigarette. His pack was almost empty.

What a shitty day!

-Zoro-

He had a headache.

He had a headache and was incredibly tired. His whole body hurt, especially his fingers burned like hell. In any case, this was not a sore muscle.

Slowly, he remembered.

He had fallen. He, of all people, Roronoa Zoro, talented swordsman and dreaded pirate, had fallen down a fucking slope, like some drunken idiot!

Ridiculous!

Wounds that did not come from a fight, but from his own stupidity. From a fall!

Pathetic!

He sighed and opened his eyes. After all, he was still alive, could have been worse. At least that's what he wanted to believe, even though he knew better.

Above him he could see the brightly paneled wooden ceiling of the sickbay, so different to the clear blue sky he recalled. He remembered looking at the sky and philosophizing about life. It had felt as if he had been lying there for hours, but he had probably fainted within seconds.

"Oh hey!" He turned his head to the side and only now realized that he was not alone. Usopp sat at the small desk, in his hands an indefinable something, probably his latest invention. "You're awake?"

"Obviously," he grumbled, ruffling through his hair. Surprised, he looked at his bandaged hands. Oh yes, he had almost forgotten how he had tried to hold on to the rock face; not one of his highlights either.

"Are you okay so far?" Usopp seemed quite nervous and rolled his chair closer and closer to him.

"Of course," he sighed, "don't worry. All okay. Just some headache."

"Well, then I would go and get Chopper."

"Right."

He waited until Usopp left the hospital room, then leaned on his elbow and hoisted himself up. His body was unusually heavy and if he were honest, every movement hurt.

With his right hand, he brushed over neck and shoulders, bandages everywhere. He sighed. Hopefully there would be no scars left. But none of the injuries seemed so bad that he should worry, not that he would ever do that.

But then he noticed something else. With careful movements, he put himself in a sitting position. The thin blanket slipped onto his lap, revealing his bare, unscathed torso. So it had not been his imagination.

After such a fall, his back had to be littered with bruises.

He grabbed the back of his head, but it seemed unharmed, blessing in disguise, so to speak. But he didn't feel blessed while he waited quietly for Chopper. No, he didn't feel blessed the least.

A few seconds later, the youngest crew member finally showed up. In tow the rest of the crew, who more or less squeezed into the small room.

"Zoro!" He was greeted in a multi-voiced manner. "Finally!"

He looked into cheerful and relieved faces. His friends were happy because he was fine and he realized that he wanted his friends to be happy.

"Finally?" He repeated, raising an eyebrow. "What does that mean? How long was I out?"

"Almost three whole days," Nami replied with her arms crossed and a shy smile on her lips. "Don't always be such a fright."

He couldn't prevent a crooked grin.

"How are you feeling?" Robin asked quite anxiously on the other hand. For a moment, his gaze remained on the cast around her arm. Then he shrugged.

"Everything's okay so far. What does our doctor say?"

He took a moment to observe all of them before he placed his focus on Chopper and at that moment he knew that Chopper knew it as well.

The cheerful faces of his friends suddenly seemed far away. None of them knew, not if they beamed at him like that. Presumably Chopper hadn't said anything, hadn't wanted to worry them unnecessarily.

For a moment there was only him and his young friend, while Zoro slowly became aware of the extent of his fall. It had been just a fall, some ridiculous fall, nothing to worry about.

The others grew calmer as they noticed that something was obviously wrong, but Zoro couldn't help them.

"What's going on?" Usopp sounded wary.

Zoro ignored him and continued to look at Chopper.

"How bad is it?" His voice sounded calm, almost relaxed. No one would even know what a storm was raging within him, but he showed nothing while they were all staring at him.

"Tell me," Chopper replied softly, biting his lip, "you tell me how bad it is."

"What does that mean? What's going on here?" The cook's voice sounded alarmed. "I thought it all went well? Marimo, stop that bullshit."

Zoro ignored him, he couldn't be bothered to worry about the cook while he was trying to understand, while he was trying to comprehend. He looked at Luffy, who slightly tilted his head but remained silent.

"No," Chopper disagreed, "this is no bullshit. I just said that it is not as bad as feared. I was able to rule out a fracture of the cervical vertebrae as well as a head injury. But..." He did not speak further and only looked at Zoro.

"But what?" Brook asked, apparently unsettled.

Zoro sighed when he saw that Chopper was barely able to pull himself together, let alone answer his friends.

With a swift movement, he pulled down the blanket and revealed his almost uninjured legs. Except for a few scrapes and bruises, they seemed absolutely fine.

He tried to find the irony in this picture. He had fallen. He, an almost unbeatable warrior, had been injured due to a ridiculous fall. He had survived this nonsensical fall, which could have been fatal, almost unscathed. A few bruises, a few scrapes, and few scratches, nothing dramatic, except for...

"I don't feel my legs."

Silence.

"I can't move them."

He bit his lower lip as he realized it, as the truth of his own words took his breath for a second. Now that he was saying it out loud, it was suddenly a fact.

"And the way Chopper looks, I doubt it will change."

Chopper lowered his head, single tears finding their way as he nodded cumbersomely, suppressing a sob.

"I'm so sorry!" He whispered, hiding his face behind his little hooves.

And suddenly Zoro felt crushed by the shocked eyes of his friends. He felt how the knowledge caught up with him, while no one else said anything. Until just now everything had been fine, until just now it had been nothing more than a thought, a whispering fear. Now it was bitter reality and he could already feel the emotions of the others stirring up his own. He found it difficult to breathe. He would lose everything, give up everything...

Chopper's tears dripped to the ground.

No, Zoro had to pull himself together, he could not lose control, not right now. He had to comfort Chopper, he had to be calm, he had to give them support, that was his job. He had to protect them.

But he couldn't, not now, not yet, not just yet. His heart beat faster.

"Can you please leave me alone for a moment?" He asked as politely as he could, without looking up, the heartbeat in his chest hard and almost painful. He would...

"But Zoro, we..."

"Just go!" He could hardly bear their sad looks, their desperate words. He clenched his hands to fists. They shouldn't see him that way. They shouldn't see what would be coming.

"Maybe it would be better..."

"Leave! I said I want to be alone!"

"No reason to talk to a lady..."

"Fuck off!" He grabbed the next best thing he could reach - a little stool next to his bed - and threw it at the cook. "Leave me alone!"

The blond ducked, so that the stool crashed against the open door.

Zoro had neither aimed nor used much force, but he already regretted what he had done, that he had lost control and so he stared stubbornly at the wall on his side.

"We should go," Robin decided in her calm voice. "Take your time."

With these words she directed the others into the adjacent dining room, but he did not look at them, he did not look at any of them. When the door fell close, he could hear their voices from behind the door, but he didn't care.

He stared at his legs; they didn't move an inch. He reached for them, nothing. He grabbed tighter, nothing. With all the strength he had, he drilled his fingers into his own flesh, could see the white bandages turning red, could feel his sore fingertips throb, but nothing.

He tried to tighten individual muscles, nothing. He lifted his left leg with his hands and tried to hold it up, it fell back down on the bed like dead meat. He bent it by hand and just tried to keep it in a standing position, but like a doll's leg it tipped to the side, fell against the wall.

It was even harder for him to breathe as a few drops of blood slipped down his leg and the inevitable knowledge caught up with him. His legs, still healthy, his legs, still full of strength and life, hung on him like lifeless weight.

He was paralyzed.

Suddenly the door opened again, and Chopper came in.

For a fraction of a second, Zoro wanted to throw him out again. Everything in him was shaken, he couldn't stand anyone else, and no one should have to endure his feelings. But that's why Zoro was who he was. He would not admit another loss of control in front of his friends, it would be pointless and embarrassing. No one needed to bear him.

It would be wiser to speak to Chopper, his doctor, to hear the irrevocably truth. He had to know what was coming for him, even though he already suspected it, already feared. Luckily, the young doctor had calmed down and stopped crying.

The moment he closed the door, words from the other side were reduced to incomprehensible murmuring.

"So?" Zoro asked the reindeer. "What are we doing now?"

He tried to stay calm, rational.

It wasn't Chopper's fault. It had been just some very stupid, ridiculous accident and he knew that their youngest crewmember could hardly handle it if Zoro became emotional.

The young doctor said nothing, still looking to the ground.

Zoro sighed and forced himself to smile, to be the person Chopper needed him to be, needed him to always be.

"Look at me, Chopper," he gently commanded. "Things are how they are, we can't change that. But what are we doing now?"

"I'd have to examine you," Chopper muttered, still staring at the floor.

"Then let's go, not like I could run away."

Shocked, the reindeer stared up.

"Too soon?"

"Too soon..."

He was surprised by how much easier it was than expected. Zoro felt almost normal, almost as if he weren't the patient. He felt like he always did when he was there for Chopper. When Chopper was there, Zoro pulled himself together, he didn't ponder into the endless nothingness, but did what he had to, and that was just to make sure his little friend didn't blame himself, because he knew Chopper well enough to know he was doing it.

Slowly, the reindeer approached.

"You have to lie down on the side so I can reach your back," he muttered without looking at him.

Zoro grumbled approvingly and turned towards the wall. However, he had to realized that his legs did not want to come along on their own. With a sigh, he lifted his leg and positioned it somewhat clumsily.

"Let me help..."

"I'm fine, Chopper!"

It took a little longer, but eventually he was in a reasonably stable position.

He sighed as Chopper took off his bandages. So from now on his life would look like this?

"Okay, then I'll start now."

Once again, he only grumbled approvingly.

Chopper's hooves on his back were gentle and careful, but determined and precise. Sometimes it was unpleasant, sometimes it even hurt, but it was nothing Zoro couldn't stand.

"Your wounds heal well, as always," muttered Chopper, "the swelling has almost completely receded."

Zoro said nothing about it but let the other do whatever he had to. In between, he could not feel the little hooves, but he knew that the young doctor was working tirelessly. Eventually, Chopper started to but on new bandages again, but he didn't resist. He was tired. So tired.

At the behest of the other, he rolled back on his back and slowly straightened up. Once again, he had to put his legs in a comfortable position by hand.

"So?" He asked, looking at his friend, "what is your professional valuation?"

Half lying, half seated, he looked at Chopper, who stuffed a pillow behind his back to make it easier for Zoro stay in a sitting position. He let it happen, giving Chopper the time to sort his thoughts. Then the other sat down on his swivel chair and looked at him seriously.

"So, it's clearly a paraplegia," he finally replied.

"And now again so that I can understand you," Zoro grumbled, unimpressed.

Chopper sighed. "A complete paralysis of both legs."

"Well, I've got that already."

"That's not funny, Zoro. Most likely, your spinal cord was injured by a vertebral fracture due to the fall. Since I do not have the necessary equipment, I can't say for sure, of course, but after I have examined your wounds closely, little doubt remains. In theory, a sprain or bruise would also be possible, but this should have healed within the last three days. And in an unconscious state, I was only able to partially check something like this."

"But you already suspected that something like this happened?"

"I didn't want to be naive enough not to suspect it."

Zoro nodded. "What does that mean for me, Chopper?"

For a long time, the other looked at him, while the beady eyes slowly filled with tears.

"I'm sorry, Zoro," he whispered.

Zoro sighed. "But that's not the answer to my question."

"But... But... It's my fault, I must have been careless, I must have done something..."

"Chopper." He stretched out one hand and put it on the other's head. He looked at Chopper seriously. "It's not your fault, it's no one's fault. It was an accident."

"But the fracture..."

"It happened during the fall."

"What?"

"Believe me, I remember well enough to recognize the feeling. You are not to blame, Chopper. You did everything just right, took good care of me."

Tears seeped into the reindeer's soft fur as he snuggled up to Zoro and wept quietly.

"You have to be strong now, Chopper," he whispered, gently caressing him, "you have to pull yourself together now and explain to me exactly what's coming."

"Mhm," the young doctor agreed in tears.

After Chopper calmed down a bit, he began to introduce Zoro to a previously unknown world of medical terms. He spoke of Plegie and Paresis. Explained the different possibilities that could have caused Zoro's spinal cord to be injured and the associated recovery possibilities, which were relatively low.

He spoke of the various extents that his injury could have, from barely noticeable impairment to complete paralysis.

After a few more tests, which were not particularly pleasant for Zoro, Chopper finally came to the conclusion that he was suffering from a so-called sensitive incomplete paralysis, or something like that. Chopper always used too many medical terms.

As far as Zoro understood, this meant that although he had no control over or feeling in his legs, as he already knew, his vegetative functions were only slightly affected. Whatever vegetative functions were. It was only after further explanations that he understood and suddenly realized how grateful he was that his vegetative functions were still working.

He dropped back against the pillow and ignored the dull throbbing pain as Chopper began to explain it in more detail.

"Could we please talk about something else. Maybe something less depressing," he interrupted the young doctor, as he certainly did not want to think about such a thing.

Chopper also sighed but followed his request and switched the subject to therapy and treatment. After only a few seconds, Zoro realized that he didn't find this part of their conversation much more uplifting.

Towards the end, he persuaded Chopper to make a prognosis, but he was not surprised by what he heard in the least, unfortunately he was not surprised at all. With another sigh, he closed his eyes and ended the conversation.

"I'll let you sleep a little for now. First, gather some strength and then we'll see."

"Yes, I'll do that. Thank you, Chopper."

The door fell shut.

Words of the other wafted in his thoughts.

Complete paralysis

Non-treatable

Lifetime

Spinal cord injury

Wheelchair

He covered his eyes with one hand and dug the other into the thin blanket.

"Fucking dammit!"

He couldn't stop the tears.

He was alive, but he had lost everything worth living for.

He was a cripple. He would have to give up his dream, give up all dreams, give up everything.

Just like that he had become weak.