4 Cumulus
"Cumulus by Imogen Heap"
"Precious by Depeche Mode"
The Recognizers wake me from a pleasant dream. This morning I sit up and glide my fingers over my chest and biceps where the hints of my dream still remain. I was with someone… we were holding each other and the rest of the world was silent. Just us.
I nearly doze off with the foggy haze of the dream still wrapped around me before I snap awake and realize I have to check in with Tron soon.
I finish my morning routine and sit on the sofa. My fingers glide over Tron's disc at my side as I bask in my dream. I can't remember the last time I was held.
Knock Knock Knock
I jump in my seat.
"Hey, Renegade! I need to talk to you," Keller's voice is unmistakable with how loud she's barking.
I sprint to the door and yank it open. Keller's standing there with impatience written all over her face. My glare cracks her ire and I pull her into my apartment.
"Are you insane? I can't have Programs thinking I'm the Renegade! What if one of them reports me?!" I whisper shout.
"Unlikely, everyone's at work," Keller says flatly, unfazed as she glances away and scans my apartment with her eyes.
"I was hungry… This place sure is drab," she insults carelessly, but I can't find it in myself to be scorned at her words. This place is drab.
"Yes, I'm too busy to be an interior decorator," I banter.
"Ha," her curt laugh is genuine, "that is reassuring. Tron must have you exhausted with you doing all the dirty work," her voice is muffled as she rummages in my cabinets by the sink. She pulls out a box of condensed energy bars I use for recon nights and extended missions. She catches my eye and I shrug. She dives in and tears open a new bar, devouring it without remorse.
"Did Tron not get you any energy?" I ask.
Keller chews her giant bite down before managing to swallow it.
"No, I have a strict eating regimen. You don't get my brains by not taking care of yourself," she eyes me speculatively, "You should probably start doing that," and takes another bite, just to show off.
"Taking care of myself? Wish I could. Not exactly working the nine to five here,"
"Understandable, your hero complex is unreasonably…"
I shoot a glare at her.
"... extremist," she finishes with a smirk.
I roll my eyes and sit on the couch so I can look outside. My hands land on Tron's disc and it apparently summons him, my comm goes off.
"Meet me at the train station. Leave the suit with Keller," He says when I open the communication.
"Okay. I'll be there in an pectro."
"Go to the ticket station, I'll find you," the Savior of the Grid cuts his end of the line.
"Goodbye to you too," I mutter before standing up, "Time for me to go… You will stay here, right? I don't want you wandering."
The scientist only gives me a dry look as I step out.
The train station is, as always, packed. Hundreds, if not thousands of Programs walk around, all with different colors, outfits, and baggage. The density only grows heavier as I get closer to the main ticket hub.
With my helmet on, I find it harder to look out of my peripherals, no way I'll spot Tron before he sees me.
As I pass one of the massive pillars that hold up the building, I'm yanked behind it where a group of small engineer looking Programs are conversing close and excitedly, between the group and the pillar is undoubtedly Tron.
"Good catch," I say as I rub my shoulder and collar where Tron's iron fingers dug in.
"You see the patrols near the ticket booths?" Tron ignored my jibe, his helmet is looking over the crowd towards the hub of the station.
"I would if I had a few extra inches on me," I mutter as I stand on my toes to see over the mass of moving Programs, "You mean the one Black Guard leading the group of sentries?" I ask when my eye catches their red circuitry.
"Yes. They've heightened patrols and disc checks recently. They want Keller."
"She must have the information we need if Tesler thinks she's important," I reply.
"She has the information," there's something in Tron's tone. He's used it before, with Dyson, when he knows more than he's letting on.
"You're going to keep me in the dark? Again?"
"I wasn't. Now isn't the time to relay this information," Tron bites out.
"Right. So where do we start?"
Bismuth's train station looks the same as Argon's, but I'm sure all the stations look the same.
Tron's instructed me to ride the train as far as I can, get off at every stop, and record the patrols. Avoiding those patrols is as easy as ever. I've been slipping in and out of crowds since I was rezzed, part of my coding.
I went down to Helium City before I turned back. Tron would have my ass if I wasn't thorough. The patrols seemed to lighten up around Carbonite City, which is just past Bismuth. Perfect.
Our initial plan is to ride as far as we can and get Keller a solar sailer to where she wants to go. As far away from Tron City and Argon. I hear Nitroux City is nice, loud, but mostly untouched since the Occupation.
I reach for one of my condensed energy bars and tear off a bite. It's thick and tasteless, but that's fine. I took practicality over taste a long time ago.
"Beck?" A voice calls from behind me.
I turn and see Able, to my dread, he's flanked by Mara and Zed.
"Oh! Hey…" I trail off my brain freezing as my mind realizes I had missed my entire shift today.
"What are you doing here?!" Mara exclaims, and all my fears are realized in the disappointment and anger she expresses. Zed's expression is similar but he seems apprehensive about it.
"I was… um," I look at Able for a save, but he only raises an eyebrow, as if waiting for the answer I would never have.
"He was meeting me," a new voice calls.
We all turn to see a green circuited woman with sharp features and her hair in a bun walking towards us. My mouth falls open. It's the woman from the apartments across the street.
"Hello, and you are?" Able introduces himself, clearly interested in the growing situation.
"Paige," she reaches her hand out and shakes with Able. It's done so confidently and without thought, it makes her older. He's done this before, professional.
"Beck," I blurt out, my hand coming out on its own.
She takes it and smirks, "Yes I know, or did you forget we already talked?" She winks at me.
I take the cue and laugh with a note of genuine embarrassment, "Right! Sorry," I sheepishly rub the back of my neck.
There's a throat clearing.
"Ah! Mara and Zed, friends from work, and Able is my boss. I didn't realize they were going to be here."
"Or that you had a shift today," Mara mutters with an eye roll.
"Which is why Beck wanted to meet. I'm here to look at his coding, see if there's anything wrong with his memory," Paige interjects with a hint of sweetness, "It must be frustrating that your boyfriend has been acting different lately."
"What?!" Zed exclaims.
"He's not my boyfriend," Mara growls at the same time.
"My apologies, I've run into a few partner Programs who were distraught by their partner's change. You have similar symptoms," Paige explains calmly again with a practiced patience.
"He's just one of my best friends! I am not in love with him," Mara defends, and behind her Zed visibly relaxes.
"Ah, I see. Then Zed is your partner. He exudes-"
"That's okay! Mara, Able, shouldn't we get back to Argon? Link is on shift instead of Beck," Zed pushes Mara by her shoulder toward the train, "Tell us what she finds out Beck!"
As they walk by, I catch him muttering, "She's scary good," to me.
I feel for the guy. He's fancied Mara for a long time, she's just too free-spirited to really notice… or willfully ignoring it. I'm not really sure.
"Very well," Able announces and walks by with a grin on his face.
Lucky save. His expression says.
I let out a sigh when the train back to Argon sets off and I'm left alone with Paige.
"Thanks. You don't know how close that was."
"I have a guess. You looked like Clu himself was sending you to the games." She smiles and nods her head, "Let's go," she marches past me with an eager pace.
"Wait, I'm thankful for the save, but who are you?"
The medic pauses a moment before she slowly turns back to me.
"Did you want me to check up on you or not?"
"You were serious?"
"You seem to have a serious problem, so yes," she struts confidently with a hand on her hip. Again, there's the aura of someone who's dealt with this before, experienced and in control. I can't help but feel obligated to go with her.
"Alright, but it's getting late, this can't be too long," I say hesitantly.
"Good. And we can do this on our way back to Argon," she proceeds to the ticket booth, "One or two?"
"Just one."
She proceeds to get her own ticket and soon enough we're on board the last train to Argon for the cycle. It's barren except for a few Programs in other compartments. Once the attendee verifies our tickets we are left alone.
"Let me see your disc," Paige reaches her hand over the table that separates us. I stare at her palm.
"Have something to hide?" She teases with a smirk.
I sigh and hand her my disc, "Don't we all?"
"True," she says distractedly, opening the diagnostics of my disc. I stare out the window and watch the Outlands flash by. Just like everything that happens in the Grid, one thing to the next, all flashing by in an instant. I'm barely keeping up, sooner or later I'm going to trip… and I wonder if it'll be worth getting back up.
My eyes dart back to Paige. Maybe if I have someone to come back to.
"I enjoyed talking to you too," Hawk had said. Maybe she can take over this whole Renegade business. I snort and look back out the window, what a selfish idea.
"What are you laughing at?" Paige asks looking up for a brief moment.
"Nothing. Just… work-related."
"Can I see?" She asks politely.
"Go ahead."
She closes out of the diagnostic screen and quickly reaches the memory banks on the disc. I take the disc and scroll back to the days where Bodhi was still alive.
"You're a mechanic," She states as if something has finally clicked into place for her. I give her a questionable look.
"Yeah…?"
"I was wondering since I saw your boss and friends," she blushes and turns back to the disc where her eyes follow a new Program on the screen, "Who's that?"
"Bodhi," I answer when I see his face. His smile is captured in a moment after he had beaten me in a disc battle, "He died when the Occupation came."
"I'm sorry to hear that," Paige says sincerely. I stay silent and look at my fingers on the table, I've never known what to say when Programs lend their condolences. The wound still stings, and I fear it may forever ache. Words only seem to bring back the pain I try to forget.
"... I lost my friends too," the medic says after a moment, "In Carbonite City."
"What were their names?" I ask and hope that I haven't brought back the pain for her.
"Rox and Unix."
"The Occupation?"
"Yes," Paige utters in distaste. She shakes her head slightly and returns to the diagnostics on my disc, "Sorry, I didn't mean to get distracted."
"That's alright, to be honest…" I pause and take a breath, "I've seen you a few times on the balcony of your apartment… The only real reason I'm letting you check on my disc."
"Oh? I thought I had earned your trust by saving your ass from ditching your shift," she muses while inspecting the DNA-like strand of coding.
"Well- I appreciate it… but-"
"It's alright, I don't exactly trust other Programs either," she soothes. I find myself calming slightly, I hadn't fully registered the smoothness of her voice until now. Her maturity matches her beauty that I've admired for the past mylas and I stare. Freely absorb that gorgeous presence in front of me.
"Do you mind?" She asks self consciously as a faint blush rises to her cheeks.
The image is burned into my mind.
Her bun is loose, stray brown and tan hairs poking out of it in adorable ways. Her head is angled so the hair that covers the left side of her face is blocking most of her face, but her cheeks are still visible with their blush. Lips pursed and brows pinched together slightly. Chocolate eyes focused on the code distractedly.
"S-sorry," I look out towards the Outlands, my own cheeks warming. I can feel her eyes darting to look at me and I take a chance to do the same. Our eyes meet and for a moment we lock gazes.
It reminds me of my dream. That moment where the world becomes silent and I'm alone with someone I trust instinctively.
"We'll be arriving at Argon Station in fifteen," the automatic voice of the train informs over the intercom.
Our spell is broken, she returns to checking my coding and I look out to see we've passed the Outlands and are riding the edge of the shore. The Sea of Simulation expands the whole horizon.
"Your coding is strange," Paige says.
"What's wrong with it?" I look at the coding but nothing seems out of place.
"There are subroutines that look severed. They were overwritten, which is fine, but the fact that they're not complete…" she looks at me with a tight face, "Did you lose your disc for some time?"
"Wow. Zed was right, you are good. My disc was stolen at one point. I was close to becoming a stray," I remark, too surprised she was able to diagnose me so accurately. Then I take a moment to mull over the implications.
"Does this mean there's something wrong? Do I need to be repaired?"
"No, like I said, they were overwritten, which happened when you got your disc back. The subroutines that were severed stay with your coding but ultimately do no harm unless you're infected with a virus or another program that can tie itself to those open-ended subroutines."
"So I'm just more vulnerable than other Programs?"
"Not exactly. You'd have to let the virus into your system for it to reach these subroutines. Basically, you'd already be a lost cause by the time a virus got this far."
"I see," I subconsciously rub my wrists where Cyrus's EMP had destroyed my outer layer.
That was a mistake.
Paige notices my movement and without hesitation grabs my wrist to expose my hidden scars. Her gasp does not give me reassurance.
"Beck! What is-" she cuts herself off as she inspects it. I try to pull my hand back but she pins my arm against the table with a surprising amount of strength.
"It's nothing, just a-"
"How old are these!?" She exclaims and pierces me with a death glare.
"At least a hilocycle," I admit begrudgingly. She sucks in a breath and lets my wrist go and resumes her work on my coding with renewed vigor.
"That, combined with your exposed subroutines could have killed you," she growls, "Exposed code like this can easily be infected and cause you to become a glitched Program. You'd be no better than a virus," she explains while pulling up the diagnostics of my entire body. She squints in confusion at the sight she sees.
I can't take it anymore.
"Give my disc back."
"No!" She commands, and I actually flinch at her sudden resilience, "What in Users is this?"
There are several warning signs I can see flashing on the diagnostic screen.
"Insufficient energy levels, multiple unsealed and burnt out energy cells, exposed coding, raw coding," she lists and emphasizes by looking at my wrists, "Beck, have you told anyone about this?"
"No…" I feel awful. This was something I was hiding from everyone. Even myself. I look down at my wrist and see them, stare at them, and recognize them as they are. Raw, untreated, unchecked wounds. Running myself down to the wire. Maybe I'd tell someone… or maybe I'd break before that.
"...Beck," Paige's voice is soft now. I look up and meet her eyes. There's something in her eyes, compassion I've seen before. Partially from Mara. Zed. Able. Even Tron. But I know that look, and only one other Program is now blurring with the woman before me.
Bodhi.