11 December

I thought Temari wouldn't make me spend time with Kankuro after what happened on Monday, but she thinks he and I should try to get along. She stopped by yesterday, trying to convince me that Kankuro isn't "that bad." I still don't buy it, but she insists that I at least try talking to him now that she's "dealt with it." Whatever that means. She's going to be working late with Shikamaru tonight, so she asked if Kankuro could come over this evening to talk. As much as I wish I could've said no, I keep reminding myself of the end goal.

I'm supposed to collect as much intel as possible. While I only expected to make contact with the Leaf, my leader was very pleased with me for making contact with a representative from the Sand. I couldn't say "no" to the opportunity to learn more about Sunagakure. Not like the Kazekage's right hand man / brother will give up information willingly…but I'll take what I can get out of him. That is, if I can stomach being around him long enough to. I wish I wouldn't have told my leader about Temari…but I'm sure she would've found out one way or another. She knows everything it seems. Now I'm stuck babysitting Kankuro for an evening.

It's like I told Temari…if he weren't so annoying, I might even be attracted to the man. I hate to admit it, but both of her brothers have grown into attractive young men, and Kankuro's a highly skilled puppet-master with high rank in Suna.

Rain drew a few quick lines through those two sentences.

Scratch that. All of that. I can't afford to even think of him in that sort of way. Besides, I can't picture ever getting along with him. It'd be nice, for Temari and my true mission's sake, but I doubt it. Why did I have to say yes? I don't want to let him into my home. I don't want to have to spend time with him. What's the point, anyway? We're going to fight each other in two days. Spending "quality time" with the enemy isn't something I'm used to

She felt a twinge of pain in her chest before adding: …well…until recently.

As much as she wanted to, Rain couldn't help but realize that the lines between her false persona and reality were starting to become indecipherable. While her words weren't always genuine, her feelings were starting to be. In the Hidden Mist Village, she didn't have this problem. She managed to stay away from others, and in-turn, never had to deal with the issue of getting emotionally invested in her peers. In the Hidden Rain Village, she was revered as an execution tool for her leaders and had lost everyone close to her in the process of rising to power. For the first time since her youth, Rain was having to face the dilemma of separating her personal feelings from how she needed to feel for the task at hand.

I'm getting too close to these people…and there's no one I can talk to about it. The Leaf can never know about the real reason I'm here, and the Rain would punish or kill me if they knew I've grown this weak. It's gotten to the point where I feel a spark of joy every time I run into someone from the village who considers me a friend. I'm not supposed to feel anything. Even worse, I'm starting to consider these people to be my friends as well when they should be the enemy...I just never imagined they'd all be so…welcoming. There's nothing I can do except try to focus on my work. I want nothing more than to complete my last three tasks so I can go home. I know I haven't gathered nearly enough intel, but this duality is starting to make me sick.

On top of everything else, I've been trying to shake that damn dream I had the other night. My emotions are taking over not only in my everyday life, but in my dreams as well. My fear of being found out has intensified ever since Kankuro came into town. I understand how that bled through into my dream…but the rest…why? I shouldn't even think about it. Like I said. I can't even entertain those kinds of thoughts. I shouldn't even feel the way I do about Temari. After all…when the next Great War begins…I'll likely be the one to have to cut them down.

Slamming her journal shut, Rain rushed to the restroom. She crashed through the door, promptly hanging her head over the toilet to throw up. Her head spun as she closed her eyes and continued to heave for the next few minutes. After coughing up every last bit of her insides, she leaned her head against the bathtub and began to sob.

Rain couldn't bring herself to eat for the rest of the day. She watched the clock as she cleaned herself up, keeping an eye out for the appropriate time for dinner to pass. Temari had given her a few more kimonos at her request, identical to the initially gifted one, along with a few different colored sashes. Rain slipped on one of the fresh kimonos after a warm bath, carefully securing a dark purple sash around it. The numb feeling in the pit of her stomach remained, but she still felt the need to look presentable, as always.

After carefully applying her eyeliner, Rain ran her fingers through her hair, organizing the curly mess as much as possible. She paced the floor in anticipation until she finally heard a knock at the door. Glancing around her place one last time to make sure all her personal artifacts were secured where they belonged, she took a deep breath and made her way to the entry. She unlocked the door and opened it, giving a submissive nod.

Her least favorite shinobi stood before her, seeming much more subdued than normal, "Hey, Rain."

"Hello, Kankuro." She motioned for him to come inside, "I see you found my house alright."

"Yeah," he plainly said, looking around her front room, "Nice place."

"Thank you." He seems a lot different tonight. I wonder what Temari said to him. "You can sit down if you'd like…I'll be right back."

He silently took a seat on her couch while Rain quickly retrieved a kettle and started to boil some water on her stove. She walked back into the living room and sat as far away from him as possible on her small sofa. After a couple of minutes of uncomfortable silence, she finally spoke up, "Look, I won't tell Temari if you head out early. You don't have to stay here if you don't wa—"

"—it's fine," he said, looking over, "I agreed to come on my own accord. I'm just not sure how to word everything I need to say."

I know that feeling. "Well, I'll give you a minute…the tea should be ready shortly." she got up, then spun back around, "I'm sorry, I didn't even ask…do you drink tea?"

"Tea's fine. Thanks."

She walked back into the kitchen to retrieve the kettle, a few choices of tea bags, and two cups. What's with him? I don't like when he's annoying the hell out of me, but this is even more unsettling. After sitting down, she poured them both a glass and sat back, "So…did you think of what you wanted to say?"

He grabbed his cup, dropping a Chai bag in it, "Sort of…basically, Temari and I have talked a lot about you over the last day or so. For one reason or another, she really wants us to get along."

Rain grabbed herself a Chai bag as well, "That's what she told me as well."

"Here's the thing. I don't like your village. I don't typically like people from your village. But Temari made it very clear that I should at least try to get to know you. I know you don't want me here. I'm socially astute enough to be fully aware of how you feel about me. I don't really want to be here, either, but…she asked me to, so, here I am."

Not the best way to word an apology, but alright. "Why don't you tell me more about yourself first?" Rain asked. I can't exactly tell him a lot about me, anyway. "I'm not that interesting, really."

He smirked, "Yeah…I can tell."

Why, you little— "Fine. I'll go first. You know where I'm from, so there's no point in talking about my village. We'll never see eye-to-eye on that, anyway. I graduated the academy at 12, like most, then continued to train with my squad for a couple of years, taking missions. When I was 15, I started to get dispatched to other nations as a peace offering…by myself. I'd work through a contract for that village, and they would do Amegakure a favor in return. That's why I didn't bother to participate in the Chunin exams the first year you and your siblings competed. Though I was technically eligible to compete with my old squad, I didn't see a point in it. I had just started my assignments and spent less and less time with my team. They even found a replacement for me before the Chunin exams, so I was merely an escort. Anyway, I'm getting side-tracked…point being, that's how I ended up here. My longest stint was in the Mist, which was also my most recent assignment. Now that I finished that, I'm stuck here for a bit. I'm sure Temari already told you this, but I'm here to complete a series of assassinations. Three more and I get to go home."

"Do you miss being home?"

She was taken aback by the question, "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"I don't know…" he took a sip of his tea, "…it's just…Temari always seems happy to be home, but it's like she misses Konoha when she's away from here."

"I don't think it's Konoha she misses," Rain smirked.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"All I'm saying is she sure spends a lot of time with Shikamaru Nara."

"He better not be hanging out with her for any reason other than to escort her," Kankuro snapped, "That's my sister we're talking about. Gag."

Rain rolled her eyes, "Oh, relax…besides the fact that they both jump six feet away from each other the second anyone teases them about dating, Shikamaru's a really great guy. If she were my sister, I'd want her to find someone like that. Not saying anything is even going on, I just think they'd make a cute couple."

"It's just…weird," Kankuro admitted, "I'm used to Temari and Gaara being by my side on the daily. Temari kind of took the place of our mom after Gaara was born. She had to take on an even bigger role for us when our dad was killed. Something always feels like it's missing when she's not around…and to see her preoccupied with Shikamaru when I'm in town…I don't know. Seeing her interested in something—or someone—other than training is foreign. Even Gaara said something to me about it, and he's not the most socially adapted guy."

"I wouldn't worry about it. Honestly? She seems happy. It's not like anyone or anything could ever replace you guys. Suna's her home and you two are the only family she's got at this point. So what if she finds a little bit of happiness here? You should want what's best for her."

"That's how she strong-armed me into coming here."

"What do you mean?"

"She knows I do want what's best for her," he sighed, "and she made it clear that she wanted me to come here tonight to try to make amends with you. I don't know what's so special about you, but she practically begged me to come here. She really values your friendship."

Rain looked down at her tea, "Yeah…I do, too."

"That being said, we should probably try to get along, at least when she's around. Outside of that, I couldn't care less."

"I'm not the problem," Rain snapped back up, "You're the one who always instigates!"

He rolled his eyes, "Whatever…I'll try to stomach talking a little nicer to you if you stop being such a short-tempered, stubborn woman."

"Is that your idea of talking a little nicer to me?"

"Well, I—"

"Try this," she interrupted, crossing her arms, "Say one truly nice thing about me."

"You first," he scoffed.

"Okay, fine…" she thought for a moment, carefully choosing what she wanted to say, "…as you know, I first saw you at the Chunin exams a few years back. Out of all of the preliminary fights, yours was my favorite."

He seemed taken aback, "Wait…really?"

"Honest. Puppet mastery is an incredibly rare skill to possess, as you know. Not to mention, Temari told me it doesn't even run into your family, meaning you had to work a million times harder than anyone else to get it down. Seeing someone at such a young age do what you did really impressed me…so much so, that I got into an argument with my original team members about it that night because I wouldn't stop talking about it. That's why I left the Chunin exams after that round. We got into an argument, so I got mad and left."

"Oh yeah?" his humble demeanor quickly turned back to its usual, prideful state, "I'm sure you got an earful when they got back, huh?"

She fell quiet for a moment before grabbing her tea, "No…I didn't. They weren't able to make it past the Forest of Death."

"Why? Did they—" Kankuro stopped himself, realizing who her partners were, "Oh, Rain, I…I'm sorry…"

"If you don't shut up about those damned Sand Siblings, I—"

"You've always acted like you're my superior, and you're not!" Rain yelled, "If you were, maybe you'd be the one getting sent out on real missions, Shigure!"

The brunette scoffed, "Real missions? Had you stayed a part of our squad, you could've been something. We could have been something. Now you're nothing but a pawn."

Rain took a step forward, choked up, "Is that…is that really what you think of me?"

When he refused to answer her, she threw her hands up and walked towards the door. Hoping he'd follow her, Rain turned around, but saw that he remained frozen in the same spot where she'd left him.

"Your arrogance will be the death of you, Shigure…just like it was the death of us."

Kankuro's hand on her shoulder brought Rain back into the present reality, "Hey…I know nothing I say could fix that, but…"

So Temari was right…he is compassionate deep down. Regardless, I can't deal with this right now. She looked up at him, shaking off the memory, "Your turn."

"Are you su—"

"Your. Turn."

"What if I have nothing nice to say about you?" he teased.

She shrugged, "If you want to be stubborn, that's fine…but I'm not letting you leave until you say at least one nice thing about me, so you might want to think of one sooner than later."

He sighed, finishing off his drink, "Fine…I wasn't going to tell you this, but since you gave me such a nice ego boost, I will. It's not a big deal or anything, but…I thought you were kind of cute when I first saw you, too."

He…he what… She quickly looked away, trying to think of something to say. Fuck. Temari was right, after all. He may have not said "hot," but he's at least borderline attracted to me at a minimum. The warm feeling across her cheeks uncomfortably contrasted with her otherwise chilled skin, causing her to internally panic.

"Now, don't go thinking I'm gettin' soft on ya," Kankuro added, "because I'm not."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Rain quickly stood up to refill the kettle.

Kankuro did a double take when she got up, "Wait, are you…blushing?" He jumped up to follow her.

"What? No!"

He slipped in front of her, standing in between Rain and the stove, "You so are!"

She set the kettle down on the countertop next to Kankuro, "Get out of my way."

"Tell me why you're so flustered."

"I'm not!" the mischievous look in his eyes coupled with his signature grin were enough to make Rain's heart skip a beat, "It's just…a little hot in here is all…"

He took a few steps towards her, quickly cornering her against a cabinet, "Really? That's it? Funny…I always assumed that Ame natives would be cold-blooded…" he reached out, wrapping his warm, calloused fingers around her freezing cold wrist, "…and it sure doesn't feel like I was wrong."

Those eyes. He's so damn beautiful—no! Get a hold of yourself, Rain! You can't let him get the best of you. "Let go of me."

Kankuro released her, knowing full well he'd won that battle, "Whatever you say, dollface."

"What did you just call me?"

"You heard me. That scarlet blush against your snow-white skin says it all."

He's such a pain! "Yeah, well, at least you can see my face!" she spat out, "You wear more makeup than I do!"

"Makeup? It's not makeup, it's face paint!"

"Yeah, yeah," she waved around, walking around him to refill the kettle, "Whatever you say…dollface." She turned around to gauge his reaction, proud of her retort. What? Why is he looking at me like that? He was supposed to get mad! "What? Cat got your tongue or something?"

"It's nothing…" he said, shaking his head, "…you just might not be that bad after all."

"What makes you say that?"

"You're a lot more fun when you're less high strung. You should relax more often."

What is he getting at? "So, what…" she asked sarcastically, "…you've decided you like me now?"

"I didn't say that," he smirked, "but I think we could at least be together in a group without ripping each other apart."

His warm eyes melted her frigid demeanor. Dammit…I knew he'd be a problem. "Fine…don't tell anyone I said this, but you're not that bad, either. You're rough around the edges, but I think I can handle it."

"So what…" he purred out, leaning closer to her, "…you've decided you like me now?"

Oh god…those damn eyes…don't feed into it…don't feed into it… She felt her will breaking. Something about the way he looked at her made her weak at the knees. I wanted Temari to be wrong. I didn't want to see him like this. "I don't know…maybe a little bit…"

"Good…" his confident tone turned relaxed as he passed by her, heading out, "…the feelings are very mutual."

Oh, fuck.

Yeah.

He's going to be a huge problem.