Magnus POV
We're both led into a quiet room that's clearly not seen much use since this church was built over a century ago.
"Sit down", I say with a smile, pointing to a sofa. I sit down and he walks over and sits next to me.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to kneel again, sorry if that weirded you out", he says. But I notice his head is bowed and he's exposing the back of his neck again. I tip up his chin.
"It didn't weird me out. I came here today to see you."
"Oh yeah?", he asks with a throaty chuckle, blushing bright red. I desperately want to kiss those velvety red cheeks. Between the blush and the slap that white face is scarlet. The color is becoming on him.
"I wanted to know if you actually smelled like that", I say.
"Me too", he admits, "You smell like..." He inhales deeply. "Whoa..." He holds his head.
"Are you okay?", I ask, grabbing his arm to keep him steady. My fingers burn where they're touching his skin and he must be experiencing the same effect because he looks at his arm and then at me.
"Yeah. Yes. I'm fine, it's just, I got a little lightheaded. You know, my headache is gone", he observes.
"What do I smell like to you? Do you feel what I'm feeling? I need you to be totally honest here", I tell him.
"You smell exotic to me. I just know it's Indonesia, even though I've never been there. Like flowers and spice and tobacco and coffee and coconut. A hint of Peruvian orchid. You smell like adventure", he confesses. "What do I smell like to you?"
"I am from Indonesia, by the way", I tell him, "That's quite impressive. To me, you smell sweet, but I hear omegas always smell sweet to their alphas. You smell like vanilla and honey, like the richest dessert in the world."
He chuckles again. "Like something you want to eat?"
Realizing what he said, he goes even redder and seems to be looking for a way to crawl under the sofa.
"Exactly like something I'd like to eat", I say.
"I don't know what you're feeling", he says, blushing again, "But I feel kind of, drawn to you. I..." He seems to be staring into my eyes and loses his focus.
"Is it okay if I put my hand here?", I ask putting my arm around him. I can't seem to stop myself. I'm torn between warring instincts of lust and protectiveness. I want throw him on his belly, rip his clothes off, drive deep inside him, and cum for an hour. But I also want to go slowly, to woo him, and keep him safe—even from me.
"It feels nice", he says, "I feel...safe with you. I trust you. I don't know why."
"You ARE safe with me", I reassure him and he lays his head on my shoulder. He instantly lifts it back up a second later.
"I'm so sorry", he says, "You're a man and I'm a man and..."
"Who told you to be sorry?", I ask him, tucking his head back on my shoulder and I feel him and hear him taking a deep breath, filling his lungs with my alpha scent. "Nothing between us is shameful. I want you to do what comes naturally to you and stop editing yourself."
He makes an "mmmmm" sound whether he intends to or not and cuddles closer.
"But I'm a Shadowhunter", he insists, suddenly scooting away, "I'm not a normal Omega. I don't simper and I'm not weak. I'm a strong, effective warrior, and I plan to continue to be. Valentine is out there. Mundanes are in danger, and I made a vow as a Child of the Angels to protect them..."
A child of the angels. Fuck. Does he really know who I am?"
"And Shadowhunters are in danger too, including my siblings. I will be fighting with the rest of them..."
My alpha senses start to tingle at that. Technically omegas aren't allowed in combat, but this isn't the time to point that out. But MY angel, as I realize I'm already starting to consider him, MY angel in danger? No. Just no. In my mind's eye, I see a demon run him through on a serif blade, his eyes popping wide in agony. The demon laughing as the angel cries out in agony one last time, blood spreading out on the ground as he dies alone and I can't reach him. The light leaving those sapphire eyes...the warmth of his pale peach skin going gray...
"NO!", I scream out and jump up from the sofa. "I..." I realize I'm panting. Great, Magnus, what a crazy overreaction, he probably thinks I'm nuts. "I mean...I understand who you are, Alexander, and we're just going to have to find a way to honor who you are within the bounds of safety rules I will insist upon."
"Safety rules?", he asks mockingly. "I'm a Shadowhunter."
I give him my best alpha glare and he backs down immediately.
"I...just...I...I was raised to be an alpha", he says softly.
My heart breaks for him. I sit down next to him and put my arm around him again. "I know. I know, I know, sweetheart, but you're not an alpha, you're an omega. You need someone to look after you."
He scoffs, "I don't."
"You do." He looks up at me.
"Are you offering?", he asks, softly.
"I would like to, yes", I answer, just as softly, "But I want to court you first. Prove this isn't just sexual attraction. And this will not be okay with your parents; it may be best to let them get used to it for a while."
"You, uh, want to be my alpha?", Alec asks so softly I can barely hear him. Tough Shadowhunter or not, he can't hide the thrilled but surprised tone in his omega voice. "You don't even know me", he whispers.
"I know you're kind and sweet and brave and the most beautiful creature on the planet earth. I know you saved my life for no reason except that risking yourself for others is who you are", I say. "I know you're sad, angry, and terrified, and I want to make you happy and joyful. I want to put a smile on your face."
He's looking at me as if I'm not speaking English.
"But there are issues here", I continue, "Big ones. I have no idea what your life must be like, but I know a male omega is not acceptable to Shadowhunters. And whatever public lip service they pay it, behind closed doors, being gay or questioning is not acceptable to Shadowhunters either. And a lot of this is new to you. You already have such heavy burdens to carry." I tickle his cheek and my heart leaps when he leans into my hand "I don't know if you want to add me to your list. I'm a warlock; my father is a demon, and not just any demon, Asmodeus, Prince of Hell. You will be judged for choosing me. We are 100% entirely different. We don't worship the same gods and we're not supposed to end up in the same place after death; I have no idea what I'm going to do about that. And as for actual danger, I love my father, he's given me everything, but I don't trust him for an instant. Add racism onto the pile. There's a lot here, Alexander. Too many burdens for such lovely shoulders to carry."
"I want to carry them", he says suddenly, then puts his hand over his mouth.
"Don't do that, don't do that, sweet angel", I whisper to him, pulling his hand from his face. "I want to hear your words. I value them deeply."
"I'm so confused. I can't have what I want", he says.
"Why not?"
"'Cuz it's wrong. Everyone says it's wrong. I'm wrong and I know it."
"Who is this 'everyone'?", I ask, "The people you know here at the Institute? Because take it from someone 800 years old who has lived everywhere on earth, there are many people for whom our kind of relationship is not wrong. There are many millions of men and women, millions of alphas, who would kill to spend time alone with you. I'm one of many. You could have anyone."
"You're right, I can't carry all those burdens alone", he says, contemplative, "But your shoulders are pretty broad...and muscular..." I realize he's checking me out. Hysterical. "Would you carry some of it with me?"
"All of it and you too", I swear. Looking at him, that's all I want to do, swear any and every oath they can throw at me. Make me sign something, make me promise on my honor as a man and a warlock that I will love and care for him. There's nothing they can throw at me that scares me more than losing him.
I take both his hands in mine. "Despite all these problems, I can't stop myself from wanting you. I would like to speak to your mother about being your mate. If you'll have me."
He gasps sharply. "I..." He starts shaking. I squeeze his hand to give him strength.
"You have to use your words, sweetheart, I have to know what you're feeling", I tell him. "This is your choice. The choice of mate is always the omega's."
"I... want you. I... hate myself for it..."
"No, no, no, no", I insist.
"But I... just please don't change your mind. Don't send me back. My mother would... please don't get tired of me", he erupts into sobs.
I'm glad he let it out, but this is, this is...insanity. Change my mind? Send him back?
I scoop him up and settle him in my lap. "Not for the wide world, little one", I tell him, kissing the top of his head. He turns teary huge blue eyes up at me and I feel the world come to a complete stop. Puzzle pieces come together and lock. He's my soul mate. He's MINE. And he's crying, he's broken. I cuddle him as close to me as I can, hoping I can squeeze all his broken pieces back together.
Fucking evil Shadowhunter cun...oh I could kill them. And it would be so easy too. It would take mere moments, guards or not. To convince this amazing creature he's something to be ashamed of.
"I'll speak to your momma", I croon against his hair, kissing him over and over. "You'll be mine soon, I promise."