Okay, I did a tiny bit of grammatical and contextual intervention, but the majority of this chapter is written by TimeBlade-NEO. Gotta say, his writing style never ceases to put a smile on my face, and I'm sure you'll like it a lot.

If there was one thing Sans should know, is that he should never shortcut after a ketchup coma. Most of the time, he managed to remember that, but every now and then, there were a few...accidents.

"oh god, i think i'm gonna- hold on, maybe not- wait...yep, i'm good."

He shook off the nausea, then attempted to stand up straight, only to feel the nausea return to him. He took a slow, deep breath, and once he felt his insides settle, he began making his way forward, searching for the rest of Ginger's group.

Meanwhile, a bit further away, a group of soldiers was watching the skeleton monster stumble away.

"What was that about?" one of them asked.

"Not sure, maybe one of the young general's pals needed something, or he just teleported to the wrong place." the leader of the group answered "Well, doesn't matter. Come on, I got a stash o' bingle juice from the dining hollow! Drinks are on me!"

They all cheered and followed after them, deciding to forget what just happened. Two of them, however, stayed behind, observing Sans almost fall over as he walked through the Beaks. One of them was a bored looking Barn owl, and the other was a Ashy-faced owl, who seemed much more interested by the skeleton.

"Hey, camper," the grey faced owl whispered to his friend. "Don't you think that this guy's a bit weird?"

"Don't know what you're talkin' about mate," he answered, just wanting to catch up with the group. "Besides, probably doesn't have anythin' to do with us. Let's just follow the rest of the gang an-"

He was abruptly cut off when his friend raised his wing and began speaking again.

"I'm going after him."

Without warning, he spread his wings and began flying, while remaining a safe distance away, after Sans.

"What- Why in hagsmire are you doing that? Cinderblaze, I get it, you think this is weird, but just let some other bloke deal with this. It might not even be…" He stopped talking once he realized Cinderblaze hadn't bothered to stop and pay attention, and had simply kept going after the skeleton.

"You gotta speak up Spyke! I can't hear you!" The Ashy-faced owl said as he flew away. The Barn owl stared at him for a while before muttering a few curses under his breath and chasing after him.

...Have you ever heard a conversation you probably shouldn't be hearing? Maybe overheard a dark secret you definitely shouldn't know, or heard something about someone you might not even know. Whenever you hear one of those, you usually feel guilty for overhearing it. However, in some cases, the people you hear are talking about you. And in that case, you either feel slightly pissed that they're talking about you behind your back, or you feel like a spy collecting information that could be used as blackmail later. Sans, while listening to the three buffs Nyra told him to find, felt the latter.

"Really, how can someone be so tall in comparison to their sibling? In all honesty, his height is terrifying. Yet he still manages to look like a friendly guy, even while looking down at us. It's amazing!" Vaygar said, lightly laughing. The other two chuckled with him, remembering the kind, yet odd skeleton.

"It's fascinating isn't it?" Phillip mused, thinking about some of the monster's strange quirks and mindsets. "How their ideologies are so different from ours, yet we still make a great team. With all our differences, people would have thought we would be staunch enemies."

Kludd not so quietly scoffed at Phillip's remark, and followed him up with a touch of cynicism.

"In my opinion, those monsters are a might too soft with their standards."

Phillip rolled his eyes and rose his primary feathers to his face.

"Oh, here we go again with this..."

"Really, they allow for things that should not exist so nonchalantly! Like those two double wingers we met a while ago, they-"

"I'm going to stop you right there." Phillip interrupted, having about enough of Kludd's mockery. "I do get what you mean by leniency, but we're not exactly the ones to judge, not knowing all the details. According to Ginger, Alphys said that Undyne is her better half, and together, they're whole."

"Hah, well, two halves might make a whole, but two holes don't make anything!"

At that moment, a lot of people around the world stopped what they were doing, as if feeling a disturbance in the force.

"You did NOT JUST SAY THAT!"

Vaygar sensed nothing but his own outburst of laughter, unable to stop; it was the BEST and WORST thing he'd heard someone say in the longest time, and Kludd was quick to join him. Phillip, however, was very much appalled, and after a long, shocked gasp, made his disdain obvious towards his begins chewing out Kludd for that joke.

"Well, I NEVER! You can't just say things like that! You never know who might be listening! What if a monster from the flatlands is passing by and heard you, how do you think they would feel about that!?"

"offended, probably."

Kludd's churrs cut off into silence right then and there, and he swiveled his head towards the sound of the voice behind him, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. Sans, who had been planning this since he made that joke, stood right there by the door, feeling very smugly proud. A wheeze escaped the beak of the Grass Owl, however, and he laughed even harder and even louder, this situation being one of the most amusing things he's seen all day.

"See, they would feel offended! Why don't you thank mister Sans for sharing this information?" Phillip said with enough sarcasm to drown someone.

"heh...well, actually, while I'm here, i should probably also tell you that alphys and undyne broke up about three months ago. so yeah, that joke doesn't work anymore."

At that comment, Kludd stared blankly at Sans and shut his beak, a twinge of regret in his amber eyes.

"don't worry pal, i mean, i'm not offended or anything. some of the jokes you made were actually alright, could use some work though. but, i'm not here to make jokes this go around. the...ablah general, or whatever the title is, called for an emergency meeting."

At that, Vaygar quieted down and began looking slightly worried.

"Oh...What's it about?

Sans simply shrugged.

"not sure. i passed out before whatever that was about happened. but from what i was told afterward, it has something to do with the murders going on back there."

The owls seemed to think for a moment before nodding.

"Very well," Phillip replied. "We'll go get our battleclaws and go-"

Sans cut him off, apparently not done yet. "she also called for the high tyto. so, let's go get him first and then we'll go solve this mystery."

They all remained silent for a moment, standing awkwardly before their bony guest.

"you don't know where he is, do you?"

The trio shook their heads...While those four were trying to figure out where Metal Beak might be, Spyke and Cinderblaze were listening to their conversation from above the social hollow.

"Apparently these fellas are talking about the High Tyto...they're looking for him because of some emergency meeting." Cinderblaze said, apparently not knowing that it was rude to listen in on conversations.

"And tell me again why I should care? We should be with the rest of the gang, not on some spy mission. That's spook's job, not ours! And why do you want to know what this is about, ya pickle-headed drongo? This might not even be-"

"This could be a plot against the Pure Ones! It is our duty to protect our kind!"

"That doesn't even-! Oh great, and now they've spotted us."

And indeed, Sans and the three buffs had spotted them...Spyke rolled his eyes again.

"Well, I suppose we have to explain this."

"And possibly introduce their face to my talon!"

The Barn Owl sighed, then began making his way down to the social hollow.

From Vaygar's eyes, all he saw was two owls hovering over them for a moment, seemingly getting into an argument, and then flying down here. The first one to arrive was the tall Barn owl, who seemed very frustrated at having to come down here. After a moment of silence, he took a deep breath, and started explaining himself.

"Alright then, I'm Lieutenant Spyke, and this is Cinderblaze, the helmet headed moron who seems to think you're plotting to take down the High Tyto or something."

"They could be!" The Ashy-Faced owl, who had just landed, yelled at the top of his lungs. "As a soldier, I cannot take any chances when it comes to the safety of the Pure Ones! And that means, I will kill anyone, even if it means killing all of you in the process, to protect our people!"

"...And yes, he's always like this." Spyke said, answering the unspoken question.

"...this sounds like a situation you'd find in a cartoon or something."

They all nodded along, despite some of them not completely understanding what was said.

"anyway, since you're here, you guys know where the high tyto is?"

"You'll have to torture that information out of u-"

"He's in the armory, doing a checkup on the armor and all that. Probably with Gwyndor, the blacksmith." Spyke said, cutting off Cinderblaze, who then shot a glare at his partner. "We could take you there, if you'd like."

Sans looked over at the other owls for a moment, before shrugging and accepting their offer.

"alright then. you guys go get your weapons, i'll go get metal beak. and make sure to bring ginger's gear too."

They all nodded, and split up to do their tasks. Cinderblaze watched the groups split up, before muttering something about his talon and following Spyke and Sans.

Both tasks were pretty easy, unlike what Sans thought they would be. He expected at least some sort of deadly quest, though that might just be the ketchup talking.

"So, you were saying before you brought me here, that there was some sort of emergency on the mainland?"

"yep."

"...Very well. You! Over there!" The owl he was yelling at, which happened to be an ordinary soldier, looked behind him for a moment, and seeing no one, pointed at himself, as if asking 'Who, me?'.

"Yes, you! Tell General Valerian that while I'm gone, he's in charge!"

Spyke, who seemed more tired than he was before, spoke as he began walking away.

"Well, our job's done. Come on Cinderblaze, let's go find the others-"

"Not so fast you two," the High Tyto interrupted. "You're coming with us."

At that command, the Barn Owl began spluttering out a bunch of protests, trying to understand why.

"If something on the mainland is bad enough for an emergency meeting to be called, we'll need to prepare for trouble...and possibly make it double...You don't get that reference, do you?"

Spyke shook his head, but sighed and stood still, with his partner unmoving beside him.

"alright, so, is everyone ready to go?"

Everyone nodded, and perched themselves onto Sans' arms.

"welp, get ready to feel very woozy for the next few hours, especially if you drank something."

And with that, they vanished...And that's why Sans is T-posing with six owls perched on his arms in his house.

...

"That is the situation," Asgore concluded, having restated everything he knew thus far to the Pure One king. "We do hope you would be able to shed a bit more light on the matter for us, considering that your forces are more familiar with these types of issues."

"I shall," the High Tyto nodded. "And I will say with confidence that your fears are warrented; whoever these people are that performed the execution, they are likely more of them within the area, and it would not surprise me if they were out to destroy you all."

"S-so, like...this is a criminal organization that w-we're dealing with here...?" Alphys squeaked.

"It looks that way, doctor," he nodded solemnly. "The whole lot of you, as well as the rest of the monsters in the area, could be in grave danger."

The crowd of monsters murmured to one another...This was bad.

"I have an idea," Metal Beak continued. "Lieutenants Spyke and Cinderblaze! Trainees Kludd and Vaygar! All four of you, front and center!"

The four buffs of two separate ranks lined up in front of their supreme commander in a flash.

"Good...That's the kind of speed I expect from you soldiers," he rasped. "I'm sending the four of you on a field mission."

"Out into the village?" Vaygar asked him.

"Correct...Asgore. Are you able to supply us with a map of the village?"

"i got a map upstairs at the bottom of my trombone drawer," Sans alerted them.

"Excellent," the boss monster nodded. "I'll be right back."

He left the room in a hurry and marched up the stairs to retrieve it.

"Now..." the High Tyto continued. "Tonight, the four of you will each be assigned to provide vigil over different areas of the village. Granted you stay high enough above the ground and concealed deep enough within the shadows of night, no humans should take notice of your presence."

"As we know, soldiers, humans are diurnal creatures for the most part; they usually retire to their quarters a few hours after sundown," Nyra informed them. "So keep watch for any strange activity taking place throughout the middle of the night. Take note from the Shadow Forest Anarchists, who abducted victims for their ranks and killed off-duty patrols in the area during the daylight hours while most of us slept. Keep watch for people attempting to break into homes...Especially the homes of monsters, whom we surmise are their primary target."

"Can I ask how you tell which houses belong to monsters as opposed to humans?" Cinderblaze inquired.

"Yeah," Kludd added. "Ain't it sort of a melting pot of both around 'ere?"

"I can answer that for you, son."

Asgore had returned, a few papers in hand(and a trombone stuck on his right horn somehow.)

"have some trouble in there, big guy?"

"Oh, just got a little...tangled up, is all. I'll get it off here in a minute; no worries," the monster king assured his former judge, shrugging it off. "As for your your question, owls, the homes of monsters here in Ebott Village all have signs over their mailboxes sporting the Deltarune. Since we've only been integrating into human society for a year so far, some humans may be caught off guard by something other than their own kind answering the door for them. I've received a few surprised reactions myself."

Asgore chortled at the thought, remembering one particular time a salesman came knocking on his door, then screamed and bolted back into the street as soon as he saw his furry caprine face.

"Yes, well anyways, every monster-occupied residence is to have a mailbox with a Deltarune sign on it, according to the policy."

"Well, that does make things easier," Spyke nodded. "How d' you suppose we should go about our posts?"

The boss monster laid out one of the maps he had in hand; it was a layout of Ebott Village, and the legend included road maps, name-labelled houses, whether houses were owned by humans or monsters, wilderness areas, and even Mount Ebott itself. The four assigned troops scanned over it curiously, trying to memorize as much as they could.

"So where would we be at on here?" Cinderblaze asked.

"Right here."

Asgore reached a paw out and pointed to one of the houses cul-de-sac, clearly labeled "we live here," all in lowercase. It was within the eastern quadrant of the village, due a ways north of the map's center line. Metal beak and Nyra peered over their troops' shoulders to take a gander at it as well.

"Right, then," the High Tyto announced. "Spyke. You are to patrol the eastern portion of the village. Especially the residential areas. The king and most of his close associates live within the area, so your vigil especially counts."

"Yes, sir. Will do," the Barn Owl nodded.

"Kludd and Vaygar," Nyra addressed. "You two are young yet; still in training, so I'll have you patrol the north and south respectively. Vaygar, the south section of the village has a lot of clusters of close-together homes and very few trees, so you should be able to spot anything easily, granted you switch areas often."

"Yes, General Ma-am."

"Kludd. The north quadrant of the village is more spread out; farmland, it looks like. The humans outnumber the monsters, but there still remains the threat to them; its remoteness could be taken advantage of, should these humans know what they're doing."

"Sounds simple enough. I should know something fishy if I see it," he replied confidently.

"And Cinderblaze," Metal Beak finished. "You're to patrol the western quadrant. It holds the greatest ratio of humans compared to monsters, and it would not at all surprise me if a decent number of the presumed perpetrators live in the area. It could be considered the most dangerous for the monsters in a situation like this."

"I won't rest for a moment, your Pureness," the Ashy-Faced Owl saluted gruffly.

"Question," Vaygar spoke up, raising a wing. "If we do spot humans attempting to break into a monster's residence, what exactly do we do about the situation?"

"Yeah," Spyke nodded in agreement. "They're humans! We can't just tell 'em to scram and show off our battleclaws, it violates the Sacred Forces' Code!"

The Sacred Forces' Code, established by the original progenitors of the intelligent animal races, was a set of laws regarding individual conduct, morale, and most importantly, interaction with mankind. One of the most quoted and most important commandments was that no animal was to ever speak to a human in their own tongue, lest the secret of their intelligence be revealed and cause devastating changes to the balance of power between man and beast.

Monsters were different; many of them resembled animals, some even to the point to which they were mistaken for such, but they were composed of magic, and not physical matter as humans and animals were, and could naturally wield its power...There was also no known progenitor of monsterkind, and no such creature was a member of the Sacred Forces.

"Very true..." Nyra agreed.

"i mean, you can still scare people without makin' it obvious that you think like 'em, right?" Sans butted in. "...don't you guys scream like banshees?"

"Ahh, yes, we do," Metal Beak smirked underneath his mask. "And furthermore, I have read that many humans view our kind as a bad omen, should we be seen...Excellent idea, Mr. Sans. An endless bout of screeching into the depths of night would likely be enough to make them flee. Especially if it got continuously closer."

"Just in case these humans aren't warded off by our calls, and do continue to try against the monsters," Vaygar asked. "Then what do we do?"

The two Pure One monarchs exchanged glances, then looked up at the monsters, then back to their soldiers, then at the battleclaws fastened onto their feet, and then back at each other one more time before saying anything else.

"...Soldiers," Metal Beak ordered. "Remove your helms and claws."

The four owls obeyed the command without question, taking their helmets off of their heads, then unfastening the loop knots of their battleclaws and sliding their talons out.

"I have made the decision," the High Tyto continued. "To allow intervention should you discover a breaking-and-entering. You will attack the human or humans from the shadows of night with your bare claws. A slash to the head should do the trick, and once you've made your mark you are to flee back into the sky as soon as you can...Even if you are spotted, a human may assume that they are simply getting too close to your supposed nest, and will not want to stick around to have to deal with your claws any further."

"What do we do if they return fire?" Cinderblaze questioned. "Do we give 'em some more of what they're askin' for from there?"

"Granted you remain hidden enough and are not noisy when flying, they should not be able to...And one more thing. Every hour, you four are to report to the fountain in the center of Ebott Village to briefly discuss your findings, and then resume vigil in your designated areas."

"Sounds like a plan," Spyke nodded.

"It's settled, then...Asgore. Show our troops to the door, if you would."

The boss monster headed over to the front door and opened it up for them. At that point, the sun was already halfway below the horizon, and the sky was streaked with the vivid orange and purple hues of dusk.

"Your watch begins now," Metal Beak told them. "...So fly."

Without missing another beat, the four buffs spread their wings and became airborne, spiraling up over the skeleton brothers' house and into the evening air.

...Once he knew Kludd was well beyond hearing reach, Phillip confronted the young warrior's admirer, a stern look etched across the charcoal-kissed feathers of his facial disc.

"Ginger," he addressed her. "I don't mean to be a gossip, especially about Kludd, but I think you should know this...You would NOT BELIEVE what he said about your friend, Dr. Alphys, and Asgore's old Royal Guard captain. It was HORRIBLE. SHOCKINGLY horrible."

"What?" she asked him, a spark of concern in her sky blue eyes.

"He said that..."

He leaned in to whisper what Kludd had said about them, word for word, into her earslit. He expected Ginger to be just as appalled, and rightfully so.

"What!? *wheeze* HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Haaa...!"

The young Sooty Owl staggered back, a look of disgusted shock on his face.

"Ginger, I can't believe...!"

"What'd he say, what'd he say!?" Uklah urged, extremely curious as to what it could have been that amused her friend so much.

"Hang on, lemme tell ya, lemme tell ya..."

She passed on the quote in the same manner Phillip had.

"Oh my Glaux, that's AWFUL!"

But as awful as she thought it was, she began cackling like a kookaburra along with Ginger a moment later. Phillip hid his face in his wings; it was a lost cause.

"I don't believe you two right now. Is Dr. Alphys not your friend, Ginger? I thought you'd be appalled by Kludd having said such a thing!"

"Ha ha...Oh, boy..." the leia huffed, trying to get all of the giggled out of her system before continuing. "Ahh, Phillip. You gotta stop being so offended by everything all the time. It's not even true anymore anyways."

"I know it's not; Sans said it himself, but..." the young Sooty Owl responded. "What does that tell the monsters about us? That we make crude jokes about their way of life behind their backs?"

"Ahh, well...Guess that wouldn't be good to spread around," Ginger shrugged. "Hey, but the fact they're both female wasn't my only beef with it when it was still a thing, y'know. Alphys is sensitive and sweet...Undyne is loud, crass, distasteful lunatic who can't sit on her rear end for much more than five minutes before she gets the urge to suplex something out of sheer boredom. And Alphys finally came to realize that and headed out the door as soon as she got the chance, which was the smart thing to do."

"...You are aware of the fact that I've been standing right here this whole time, right?"

The tawny Barn Owl tensed for a moment, then looked directly up. Undyne was hovering over her, the yellow sclera of her eye flashing angrily and her ear fins pinned back against the sides of her head.

"...So you have."

Undyne's lips curled, revealing the sharp, yellow teeth hiding behind them as she rose her arms.

"Oh, you asked for this, ya little punk."

She made a fast attempt to grab Ginger from off the ground, but the young owl had already spread her wings and darted out of the way of her deadl grasp through midair.

"I think you missed."

"Damnit! I miss the time when you couldn't fly away like a coward!"

"You mean when I was human?"

"Yeah! You were bigger! Stronger! And a fair challenge! Now I could snap your spine in half with just a flick of the wrist if I could grab ya, and the only reason you stand any chance against me is because your dumb wings!"

"Are you implying that I'm a weakling?" Ginger retorted, her beak wrinkling up as she swiveled her head around to face her again. Toriel put herself in between the two opposing parties again in an attempt to break up the looking fight.

"Easy, you two, please," she urged them. "We would not want to start a brawl in Sans and Papyrus' living room, would we?"

"...You're right," Undyne nodded.

"Ah...Thank goodness," the former queen sighed.

"We'll take this to the backyard where we have more open space!"

"What?"

"Now we're talkin'!" Ginger cheered. "I'll gear up and meet you outside in exactly one minute, fish breath! I'm gonna make sashimi out of your face!"

"Sounds good to me! I can't wait to reduce you to chicken salad..."

"wow...you guys really gonna go at it?" Sans questioned as Uklah handed over Ginger's helm and battleclaws. "undyne's probably gonna run down to her place again and grab her own armor, y'know."

"Yeah, I know. But I'm good at pinpointing weak spots."

"Golly..." Asgore remarked, exchanging nervous glances with his son. "Don't either of you hurt yourselves too badly out there. Please..."

"Yeah..." Alphys agreed. "A-are you sure you wanna g-go up against Undyne like this?"

"Oh, ho ho, trust me, Al'," the Barn Owl replied. "I've been waiting for this day for a YEAR...I'm not gonna let a chance like this go to waste."

"O-oh...Um...Okay..."

"Hey, if everyone wants to watch and make sure nothin' bad happens, they can, though," Ginger told them as she secured the battleclaws on her left foot. "It'll make for a dang good show, I can say that!"

"Oi, I'm ready to see you fight!" Uklah cheered. "Come on, gang, let's give them an audience!"

"I myself am curious as to what Ginger could do up against something so formidable," Nyra added thoughtfully.

"We shall see momentarily," her mate nodded, the two of them already heading towards the door. "If Ginger has gone up against the captain before as a human, I wonder what tactics she will apply in her birth form."

"Should she fare as well as she hopes to, that will continue to prove her potential," the Ablah General continued. "...And we'll be one step closer to knowing that she is ready."