Chapter 4 – First Rate Bad Plans
WARNING – Non/Con magic plant – In the first scene, which is long, a character is attacked by some of the magical plants, taking them along for a wild ride. See endnotes for more details.
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Because Audrey was not a creative person, she ended up at the Enchanted Lake.
She didn't want to go back to her room where Doug could find her. She didn't want to be on campus at the same time as his family, she didn't want to think about his dumb, soft grin, or look at the pile of books she had been so excited to share with him.
Well, not anymore. Audrey was a free woman again.
Hooray.
"Looking a bit under the weather, princess?"
For a moment, Audrey thought she had imagined the drawled accent of one Harry Hook, but when she looked up from her depressed slump, he was standing five feet away with that same unapologetically wide smile of his.
"Don't you have better things to do than stalk through the woods?" Audrey snapped, resituating herself on the fallen log she had claimed as her throne. They were on the remote side of the lake, not far from the accidental mushroom grove Audrey had created, but distant enough that they wouldn't be stumbled upon by the accidental royal looking to have fun.
Or so Audrey had thought.
Harry's grin widened with his now expectable level of mania. "Last I checked, ye don't own this forest," he drawled. "I can go where I want by your princey's order – the stupid shit."
Unable to help it, Audrey huffed a laugh at that. "Yeah, he really fucking is."
Harry froze, but recovered into his usual mask of flirtation with admirable expertise. "Didn't expect ye to agree with me, but perhaps I shouldn't be surprised, since he scorned ye." He made a show of ambling over towards her, plopping himself down on the far side of the log as though he didn't have a care in the world. "That what got ye out here again? Scorned by dwarf boy?"
"What about you?" Audrey countered, unwilling to indulge in this conversation.
Harry gave her that wide grin. "Thought I'd follow the pretty princess, is all."
"Uma teleported you out here again, didn't she?" Audrey laughed. "You got worked up and she sent you here to cool off."
It should probably be more worrying that Ben kept bringing people over with affinities for magic. Fortunately for them, Uma didn't seem interested in using her powers to attack anyone. According to Audrey's sources, she mostly doted on her boys – at least when she wasn't banishing Harry for being an obnoxious shit.
Yeah, even Uma didn't love the first mate a hundred percent of the time, that was how annoying he could be.
"What fucking of it?" Harry snapped, because he honestly had no chill. "She'll come back for me. She always does."
"Yep," Audrey drawled, tilting her head back with a lazy drawl. "Must be nice."
Harry tensed, too wary to reply for a moment, before he eventually started to relax. "Nothing nice about it," he said in a typical Isle response. "Just practical. I'm her right-hand man, she needs me."
"Just not in the way you want," Audrey hummed, taking minor delight in the way he tensed all over again. "You want her to looove you."
Audrey barely interacted with Harry and she knew that much. He followed the captain around with the most hopeful puppy eyes she'd ever seen, and she had witnessed Ben trail after Evie looking like a damn gobsmacked baboon.
"Love is for children," Harry snarled.
"Then you're a child," she countered. "Who wants nothing more than to give his love and affection to his captain, but she refuses to take it because she doesn't think you can be serious." She contemplated his predicament for a moment. "Probably because you flirt with everyone as a default."
"I can be serious," Harry hissed. "I've been fucking dedicated to Uma since we were kids."
"Dedicated to her crew," Audrey said, now understanding the distinction enough to comment on it. "But dedicating your heart to someone is new, terrifying territory for you VKs." It was actually kind of depressing to think about. "You don't think you should, so you don't."
Normally Audrey wouldn't bother being this candid with someone she didn't like, but talking to Harry made her feel slightly less pathetic about her love life, so here she was. It was strange that he was even indulging in this dialogue, which meant he must be feeling particularly lost.
"I'd do it," Harry pledged. "For Uma."
"Yes, Harry," Audrey sighed. "Everyone but Uma knows that you'd hurl yourself off a cliff for her, it's getting the point across to her that will prove to be the problem."
"Then what should I do?" Harry asked, and then upon realizing he had requested help in any capacity, he sputtered. "I mean, hypothetically speaking."
"You could stop flirting with everyone else," Audrey mused. "Maybe have a candid conversation with Uma where you discussed your feelings and expectations."
That seemed to work for fucking Mal.
"Or," Harry said, a smile crossing his face. "I could show her I can be dedicated to one person. If she sees I'm capable of romance, of committed romance, she'll realize my intentions are true!"
"I mean, sure," Audrey said. "Though I get the feeling you're going to do that in the dumbest way possible."
He had that look in his eye. That Ben look.
Harry confirmed this in the next second when he turned to Audrey, gaze wide and smile brilliant. "Date me."
"No." Audrey didn't even consider it.
Harry rolled his eyes. "Not really date me, I mean- ye know, pretend. That way, ye can get back at yer dwarf sweetie and I can prove myself and maybe make Uma jealous."
"No one is going to believe that we like each other," Audrey countered.
"Isn't opposites attracting like, an Auradon thing?" Harry burst. "Come on, people could believe that."
"They won't believe us dating out of the blue," Audrey pointed out. "They would think – 'hey, that's weird and from out of nowhere, they're probably not really dating'."
"Then- then I swept you off your feet!" Harry declared, jumping up from the log. "Douglass broke yer heart and I swooped in-"
"And I had really low standards," Audrey grumbled.
"Come on," Harry griped. "There's got to be some way it could work."
Because Audrey was tired of thinking about her own dumb problems, she latched onto the suggestion as a sort of stupid thought exercise.
"We'd have to take it slow," she deduced. "Like- let's say this meeting was the spark, right? We still don't like each other but we realize we aren't the most horrible humans in all of existence and maybe find some common ground. Reluctant appreciation. Things could grow from there."
"How so?" Harry asked, sitting back down on the log.
"Um… I give you my number," Audrey decided. "On a whim. We send salty text messages to each other and you send me pictures of Gil being a goof and then of whatever your latest sewing project is-"
"Who says I sew?" Harry asked, getting all tense.
Audrey rolled her eyes. "We know Uma isn't the one using the sewing machine in her room, and no offense to Gil, but I think he'd break it before he figured out how to use it. That and the fact that you guys are getting new clothes makes it a simple process of elimination."
"Ye can't tell anyone," Harry hissed. "They'll think I'm weak."
"Only morons would think that, but okay, if that's what you want," Audrey allowed with a shrug. "So we bond over texting. And then we'll… I dunno, meet up to spar every once and a while."
"The way ye did with him?" Harry hummed, indicating Audrey hadn't been as stealthy as she would have liked.
"Exactly," she said. "I'll want to reclaim that for myself so it isn't tinged with memories of him, and you'll jump at the chance because you want to see how a princess can fight and then we'll bond over that. Maybe start getting lunch afterwards."
"Where I can regale you with tales of Gil's antics and ye can- what, tell me about dumb princess stuff?"
Audrey rolled her eyes. "It isn't dumb. And I can pass along all the latest gossip you try and fail to collect for Uma."
Harry sputtered. "I don't fail."
"But you don't succeed as much as you like," Audrey hummed. "We'll take the slow route, have outings that are dates without either one of us calling them dates until we are essentially dating. That would make it believable to the public. And you'll like, freak out about it at first because you're supposed to be dedicated to Uma, but you're in Auradon now where anything is possible and you can love who you want-"
"Who said anything about love?" Harry snapped.
"Fake love," Audrey sighed. "Fucking shit, calm down for like two seconds. Now, you won't feel comfortable enough to ask me out which means I'll ask you out myself and you, unable to back down from a challenge, will accept. And then we'll date and people will believe it, and Uma will get to see you in romance action and I will have something to keep me occupied while I get over Doug."
"Is it a fair trade?" Harry asked, because VKs were big on that, on keeping things even. "Ye don't seem to be getting as much out of it."
"At least dating you, I know you're an asshole," Audrey grumbled. "I dated Doug and Ben thinking they were good guys, and they mostly were until they weren't, so I guess the certainty of what I'm getting will keep things even."
"Not quite," Harry decided. "I might be evil, but I ain't stiffen' ye so ye can lord this over my head. What else do ye want?"
Audrey rolled her eyes, because there was nothing else Harry had to offer her that she might even remotely want. In her mind they were even, he was doing her just as big a favor by distracting her from her past, but she was too tired to come up with an argument for that.
Her gaze wandered over towards the mushroom patch.
"Go take a seat in those flowers," she said. "Then we'll be even."
Harry blinked at her. "What, seeing me with something pink and pretty will make things even? Be serious."
"Yeah," Audrey sighed. "You're right. You shouldn't mess with that shit anyway." She narrowed her eyes in thought, and was so lost to it that she missed the way Harry tensed.
"What is that shit?" Harry asked, his voice deceptively calm.
Audrey narrowed his eyes at him. "Seriously, don't mess with it. I shouldn't have suggested it in the first place. You really would be doing me a favor-"
Harry stood up.
"Dumbass," Audrey sighed as he wandered over towards the patch. "I'm not joking, that stuff is bad news."
"It's flowers," Harry said, staring down at the patch with immense incredulity. "And some fucking mushrooms. What's so bad about those?"
"They're magic," Audrey said. "And assholes. And don't get too close, I mean it."
"Oh, no," Harry drawled, purposefully drawing closer to the cluster. "Better not stand too near the magic fungus, it might think I'm threatening its territory, or-"
Audrey didn't see what happened, but she was pretty sure a vine wrapped around Harry's ankle and gave him a rough jerk that sent him sprawling down into the flowers.
"Harry," Audrey hissed, rising to her feet. "Crawl out of there, now."
"I'm fucking trying," Harry snapped, but more vines had moved to trap his legs, wrapping around his wrists the same way they had done to her before. "What the hell?"
"They won't hurt you," Audrey offered. "But they will sex you up, so-"
"What?" Harry squawked, though this was cut off with a furious sound when the plants seemed to yank his pants and underwear down his thighs. "Are ye fucking shitting me?"
"No," Audrey sighed, watching a group of flowers move to lap at Harry's bared dick, making the pirate inhale sharply. "They will eventually get bored with you, but until then, you just sort of have to ride it out."
"I am not riding out- fuck-" Harry groaned, a flower swallowing his member in one wet movement, the plant visibly sucking on him with a relentless sort of determination. "Fuck, fuck, fucking shit."
"Yeah." It was different watching it from the outside, though Audrey's mushrooms pulsed with interest, likely responding to the active magic in the air. The one nestled between her folds was throbbing steadily, making her swell up again in want, and the one behind her was leaking a steady lubricant like a threat, Audrey knowing that it would soon work up to expanding and thrusting.
"S-Stop watching," Harry snarled, legs spasming when another few flowers curled low to wrap around his testicles, sucking on those. "H-Help me get out."
"It would just trap me too," Audrey said. To be fair, she did sympathize with Harry's position, she had been there before. "Like I said, you just need to bear with this."
"I'm getting sucked off by a plant," Harry snapped, blush darkening when a few flowers seemed to work their way under his shirt, pushing the fabric high. "And it- it keeps licking-"
"I know," Audrey sighed.
"Has- has it fucking- has it done this to ye?" Harry rasped, incredulous.
Audrey felt herself flush. "Maybe."
"Holy shit," Harry gasped, drawing out into a moan when two small flowers curled around his nipples, sucking on them with obnoxious squelches that made Audrey's boobs ache with envy.
Ugh, now was not the time.
"Holy shit, a princess- Ack-" Harry thrashed, eyes going wide as he looked below him. "Stop."
But the plants had a mind of their own, which was likely what found Harry dragged onto his hands and knees, the plants between his legs still working furiously. The long train of his coat was brushed aside by a vine to bare his pale ass, but Audrey was more interested in watching a thick flower work itself between his cheeks, lapping at his entrance in lazy movements that had Harry shaking.
"Stop, stop," he growled, glaring at the flower. "I'm not- I'm not a fucking sissy."
"Yeah, and I'm not a whore," Audrey said, feeling the mushroom between her cheeks expand with fury, stretching her wide before it began rutting into her. "But the plant's gonna do what it wants."
Harry looked at her with wide eyes. "Did it- this?"
Audrey shrugged. "Maybe."
"Holy fuck," Harry repeated. "Ah hell, ah fuck- ah-"
The flower started slurping at him, lapping in interest as it relentlessly teased that twitching ring of muscle, urging it wider and wider as it made Harry more slick.
Oh, that was an inviting hole.
Audrey didn't realize how inviting it was until her groin gave a pointed throb, a hot heat sparking around her clit, and she recognized a sensation she hadn't felt in a while. It was growing again, despite the fact that it had let her wear panties and exercise pants for a while now. It seemed to be revolting, or at least excited, but either way it had Audrey stumbling out of Harry's line of sight, the princess moving behind him so she could collapse against a tree.
Fuck. Fuck, it was still going, straining against her clothes, hard and unapologetic. She snuck a hand into her underwear to see if she could ease some of the tension and gasped when it shot up through the gap in her clothing, surging so fast it sent a pulse of need through her body.
Oh, hell. Her clit was out and it was still growing – four inches, then five – and then it was getting wider, rounding out while it still kept growing-
"Fuck, fuck, please," Harry moaned, his face pressed down into the mushrooms for some reason but his ass still sticking up in the air like an offering. "I can't- I can't take anymore-"
His hole was being lavished by the flower, loud slurps that worked all the way around his rim, making that puckered ring of muscle twitch open eagerly. Audrey ached to see it, felt her breath catching when her clit grew larger than it ever had before, almost like she had a dick of her own. Ugh.
Tension around her ankle was the only warning she got before she was being dragged forward, an undignified squawk leaving her throat as her clit bounced against her stomach.
"Fucking, no," Audrey snapped, fighting with the vines, but more had grown since last time, enough to easily trap her wrists and drag her forward, until she was angled against Harry's legs. "Shit."
"Princess?" Harry croaked, turning his head to get a look at her. "Fuck."
"Yep," Audrey said through gritting teeth, scowling when her pants and underwear were unceremoniously dragged down her legs. "Sorry about this."
She waited for the plant behind Harry to attack her as well and was startled when it pulled away, though she shouldn't have been. Somehow she could still be surprised by the dumb magic that affected her life.
So it was a complete shock when the vine dragged her forward, shoving her clit into Harry until they both crooned, shocked by the development.
"No, I can't-" Harry gasped, slick hole clutching around her with a relentless tease. "I can't- I'm no fucking sissy."
"You're not a sissy for doing anal, shithead," Audrey snapped, mostly because she was getting worked in and out of him, fucking him in earnest while slick gushed down her legs. Ugh, what if she made new flowers? What if they both did? "D-Don't kink shame."
"I don't know what that fucking means," Harry spat, his fingers digging into the ground as he scrambled for purchase. And yet, his hips kept jutting back into Audrey's attentions, but maybe he was just making the best of things.
"It means w-what someone does in the bedroom is um- none of anyone's fucking business," Audrey gasped, sort of overwhelmed by the fact that she was fucking someone, that she was fucking Harry.
"T-Tell that to the Isle," Harry growled. "Ah- fuck-"
"Like that?" Audrey asked, unable to help herself as she rutted into him.
"N-No," Harry moaned. "No, I-"
Audrey's clit surged, wide and deep, knocking the breath out of her and making Harry thrash against the ground.
"Fuck," he hissed. "Stop, I hate-"
The flowers between his legs pulled away, leaving his flushed erection hanging low, covered in slick and twitching relentlessly with each push.
"Harry, you shit," Audrey growled. "It's just going to get worse if you deny it."
"I'm- I'm not letting some fucking flowers tell me how to-"
A hard squeeze, and Audrey pulsed, her entire body twitching as she gushed slick down her thighs. She could feel her clit shrinking with each burst of liquid and moaned all the way through it, at the way Harry twitched around her, at the feel of her returning to her natural size.
"Ha," Harry cheered. "Take that, plant."
"Don't mock it," Audrey hissed, still gushing when the vines pulled her away, sprawling her out on her back, legs wide. "Harry-"
"It's just a plant," Harry giggled. "Ye don't need to- fuck."
Yeah, Audrey would feel the same way if a thick mushroom was shoving itself in her ass too (which, it kind of was). The mushroom inside her had nothing on the mushroom that was working its way into Harry, which seemed to shove him to his very limits.
"No- shit," he gasped as it worked itself steadily deeper. "Fucking hell- ah-"
The vines were kind enough to turn him over, kind enough to strip off his pants and underwear so they could hike up his legs, allowing him to see the giant mushroom thrusting its way into him.
"It's too big, it's too big," he panted, but his dick was bobbing hard against his stomach, leaking green slime and clear slick in a steady kind of stream. "Princess."
"Just like it, you asshole," Audrey snapped. "If you own up to enjoying it, it won't try so hard to pleasure you."
"It's trying to pleasure me?" Harry gasped. "This is fucking torture."
"It could be worse," Audrey offered, shivering as a small flower began licking at her folds. "Jay could be watching this."
Harry shuddered, his whole body seeming to thrash, and Audrey filed that information away for future use.
"Don't say that," Harry growled. "Fucking Jay and his dumb eighteen boyfriends."
"He has like three, but whatever," Audrey said, lying back in surrender as the vines tugged her pants and underwear the rest of the way off. "And two girlfriends."
"W-Who needs that many people?" Harry moaned, losing himself to the mushroom that eagerly fucked him. "T-They say I'm a slut-"
"You're not," Audrey snapped, because she was tired of people getting judged for a healthy appreciation for sex. It was sex, it was supposed to feel good.
"How can ye say that?" Harry gasped, his back arching. "W-When I'm taking it from a damn mushroom."
"A magic mushroom," Audrey reminded him, sighing when her legs were pulled up similar to his, leaving her just as exposed. "That's not your fault, but how big the fucking thing is- that's on you."
"I can't- I can't believe we're negotiating with foliage," Harry growled. "F-Fine. I- I like this, now please, please just- I need ye smaller."
It seemed to work, Harry sighing when the mushroom shrank to something more acceptable. As a reward, another flower curled between his legs, swallowing his dick hard enough that Harry was shouting.
"Oh fuck, oh fuck," he panted.
"Just enjoy this," Audrey suggested, even though her own mushroom seemed determined to work itself in and out of her, mimicking the movement of Harry's. "Pretend it's Gil or something."
"I wouldn't- I can't do this with Gil," Harry said, incredulous. "The stupid shit would treat me like a girl."
"Then correct his misconception," Audrey snapped. "Fucking even I know Gil's dumb as dirt, but he takes direction well if you give it to him."
The flower between her legs rewarded her by licking her with light, careful teases.
"B-Besides," Harry continued, deciding to ignore her. "I'm dedicated to Uma. I don't- I'm not Jay, I don't need more than one."
Audrey watched the mushroom inside him swell again, shoving deep until Harry was crooning, hips rocking as he likely came undone into the eager mouth of the flower.
"The mushroom thinks you're lying," Audrey informed him, shuddering through her own release as her mushroom mimicked his.
Ugh, it felt good. Good enough that she was shaking, savoring the way the mushroom shrank under her careful clutches-
Until it fell out onto the ground.
It took Audrey a moment to realize she was clutching onto nothing, but the mushroom- it was gone, had fallen harmlessly on the ground and wasn't stuck inside Audrey like it had been for weeks.
At last, part of her was free.
"Well, fuck the mushroom," Harry muttered as the flower fell away from his groin, the mushroom inside him shrinking as well. "And fuck these plants. Ye were right, they're fucking crazy."
"Harry," Audrey warned when she saw the pirate begin to struggle out of foliage. "Don't go near the lake, okay?"
"Fine," Harry said, stumbling to his feet. The mushroom was still inside him, though now smaller. "I won't- fuck." His heel was caught, and Audrey could just see it, one wrong move sending him tumbling into the water, and while on one hand he sort of deserved it, on the other, Audrey generally didn't think anyone should go through this shit, so she started shaking out of her restraints too, and was surprised when it was allowed.
"Harry," she tutted, rising onto awkward feet because the flower was still between her legs. "Just- take my hand."
"I can get it," Harry said, likely embarrassed by how helpless he'd been. "I can-"
Lose his balance, just like Audrey suspected.
He went tumbling into the lake, and Audrey's breath caught for all of a second before a mushroom shoved at her ankle, sending her forward too.
Damnit.
"Fucking shit," Harry crowed, popping out of the water holding his butt. "What the hell?"
"You dumbass motherfucker," Audrey hissed, scrambling back onto the bank as her small flower swelled into something huge that licked eagerly into her, a thick tongue that fucked her throbbing need with a dedication that made her feel faint. She grappled for it, trying to pull the damn thing off, then growled when she felt the flower's vines wrap themselves around her upper thighs, fixing it in place.
Great. Just fucking great. She had just gotten rid of one thing only to gain another. And the dumb mushroom inside her was swelling, but without having anywhere to go it was just spurting new streams of liquid deep inside, and Audrey could already feel her breasts ache in phantom pain for what was to come.
"What the hell is this?" Harry asked, feeling at the bulbed head that protruded out of him. "Is it fucking stuck?"
"For now, yep," Audrey drawled, riding out the waves of her own bullshit. "It will fall out in time."
"How much time?" Harry growled, stalking back onto the shore.
"Based on hypothetical experience," Audrey gasped between licks. "Um- a couple weeks."
"Fucking Auradon," Harry snapped, which-
Yeah, that explained the situation pretty well.
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Audrey snuck Harry up to her room using the secret passages, because like hell was she going to let people see them together in this condition.
"L-Let me get this straight," he said as she shoved them into the bathroom, turning on the tub in angry movements. "We're stuck with these things?"
"What part of enchanted foliage did you not get?" Audrey asked, pausing when the tongue of her flower thrashed spastically against her groin, thrusting deep in a tease before settling again. "They have a life of their own. They do what they want, and what they want is to feed off our sexual juices or something. I never got the specifics." She dumped a handful of bath salts into the tub before she fumbled for her lighter. "The one you have will let you use the bathroom, but otherwise you're stuck with it. It will fuck you at least twice a day – don't ask me when, I was never able to figure out a pattern."
"Fucking hell," Harry growled, glaring at his butt like it personally offended him. "And there's no way to get the damn things out?"
"I tried a lot of shit, Harrold," Audrey snapped as she began aggressively lighting a handful of relaxation candles. "Short of going to the Moors and locating a well of enchanted water – which could either help or make things drastically worse – we are stuck with these things until they feel like they're done with us."
"Y-You're stuck with it," Harry panted, lips parted and cheeks lightly flushed, his hips swaying in a motion that indicated that his mushroom was expressing its displeasure with his displeasure. "I'll um- just ask Uma-"
"Yes," Audrey interrupted, re-hiding her lighter in deft motions. "Because that will get Uma to take you seriously. That will get her to think you care about more than just sex. For all she knows, you got that thing on purpose."
"I did not," Harry snapped, seeming to go dumbstruck in the next moment before his legs crumpled beneath him, his hips twitching as the mushroom fucked him hard and good. "I- I can't- I can't live with this thing."
"Sure, you can," Audrey said, as though she was not watching a pirate hump her bathroom tile. "I did. And let me tell you, it's a lot better if you work with it."
"But I- I'm not-" Harry's throat bobbed in a swallow, the pirate likely revisiting some of his earlier hang-ups. "I'm not supposed to like this shit. Even if ye say it's okay, o-only whores w-willingly bend over and take it, and I- I'm not-"
"Harry," Audrey sighed, settling close to him so she could run a hand through his dark, messy hair. "You're not on the Isle anymore, you're in Auradon. And in Auradon, how you enjoy sex is literally no one else's business. I mean…" She swallowed, feeling uneasy. "I um… didn't like it when I first got it either, because they say only sluts like anal, but over time I figured fuck whoever says that. It feels good. There's nothing wrong with enjoying something that feels good. It's not like it's hurting anyone else."
"B-But what would they think?" Harry panted, looking up at her with glazed eyes. "That the m-mighty Harry Hook likes this? They'd- they'd think I was weak."
"If you can still beat the shit out of people, you wouldn't be weak," Audrey soothed. "That's assuming they found out. And so what if they do? It would make your enemies underestimate you, thus making them easier to destroy."
Harry seemed to consider this. At least, as much as he couldconsider this while being slowly ravished.
"I- I guess you have a point," he gasped. "Just- w-when we go back to the Isle, I was- if they knew, they might jump me, to-" He flinched. "Since they knew I liked it."
Audrey froze at the implication, her heart flooding with a cold sort of fury that refused to release her.
"You're not going to get fucking raped," Audrey snapped, lowering herself so she was on the same level as Harry. "And you're not going fucking back to the Isle, okay? Because you're not going to break any laws so you can stay here and worship Uma and take care of Gil and live your fucking life, got it?"
"Y-Ye want that?" Harry gasped, eyes widening slightly.
"I might not be Mal's biggest fan, but she's already proven that you guys just want to live your damn lives without fear of getting attacked all the time," Audrey explained. "She's already proven you can do a lot of good if given the opportunity."
"I'm- I'm not good," Harry spat, body rippling in a full shiver.
"You're good to Uma and you're good to Gil," Audrey pressed simply. "That already proves that you're capable, Harry. You don't have to be the fucking nicest asshole in the world if you don't want to, Light knows I'm not, but you don't have to be an evil fuck just because your dad was."
"Oh- oh," Harry gasped, and then his hips slowed their movements, his mushroom likely satisfied. "…I wanna get the rest of our crew off."
"Then we'll fucking work for it," Audrey said. "And we'll start working on getting the other kids too. I'll even vouch for you, though it might not be worth much."
Harry shot her a weary smile. "Think it might be worth plenty, princess."
-:-:-:-:-:-
Endnotes:
And thus the friendship no one expected, least of all those involved, came to be.
Thanks to everyone for the feedback! As disappointed as we are all in Doug, I thought we could take a moment to balance the angst with some absolute absurdity by way of making Harry's life just a bit more difficult. If that is not a crowd pleaser, I don't know what is ;)
Story notes:
Do you like how I set up this grand plan for Audrey and Harry to date and then proceeded to use none of it? Yeah, I really love my brain sometimes.
WARNING – Non-con magic plant – In the first scene, Harry gets attacked by some of the plants at the Enchanted Lake. Like most of the VKs, he is sexually repressed so he's not really down for it, so while the plant doesn't physically hurt him, it does sex him up against his will and leave him with a present, much like Audrey. If you would prefer to skip this, look for this line:
"They won't hurt you," Audrey offered. "But they will sex you up, so-"
You can skip out on the rest of the scene, just know that Harry leaves the lake with an enchanted mushroom like Audrey had, Audrey loses one of her mushrooms and gets a flower plastered to her groin, and they are now partners in crime.
Until next time.