DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own. PLEASE REVIEW! I will take advice and suggestions from my readers - especially on various pairings - while continuing the story.

Thinking

Emphasis

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking

Kurama's got issues, and Ru-chan might just be deceiving herself about something important.

The Great Kyuubi no Kitsune's first thought upon looking up to see his latest "vessel" was that the fast fleabag had screwed up the seal big time. Had that been the case, it wouldn't have surprised him. The yellow-headed pansy wasn't a (loathsome) red-haired Uzumaki menace, so he had no business making an on-the-fly seal that was so complex. And then he summoned Shinigami-sama to take away his other half? "Tch."

He had no choice but to continue healing his despicable jinchuuriki - otherwise, he would forever leave the mortal plane. He certainly respected Shinigami-sama: he had a hatred for humanity that rivaled his own, and he definitely approved of him 100%. Kurama did not wish to spend eternity in Shinigami-sama's belly, however, battling Inari-only-knows what kind of fleshies the deity swallowed. There was also the fact that the Yondaime menace was in there forevermore and he had no desire to ever again interact with the barbarian that ripped him in half.

Unfortunately for him, the bastard Yondaime's seal was strong. It would be difficult to get out, but Kurama had plans. He was nothing if not tenacious. And filled with hate, of course: that was a given.

The first time he sensed his vessel approaching, he couldn't believe she referred to him as a common zoo animal. That definitely moved her up on his kill/maim list. She, another damnable Uzumaki, didn't stay after wandering the sewers of her polluted mind. Why had Kami-sama not killed off that entire clan?! The only thing that would make more sense - let alone delight him thoroughly - would be if the descendants of father's brat, Indra, would all die torturous deaths. "Uchihas," Kurama spat. "I will ensure that you all die," he vowed.

A young heir to a prestigious clan abruptly sneezed.

Catching a brief glance at her that first time left him with so many questions. Why, (not to mention how,) had the Uzumaki-Namikaze spawn appeared in front of him as a fully-grown female? And what kind of clothes was the meatsack wearing? And let's not even mention those horrible pointy sandals! At first, he wondered just how long he had been sleeping before he considered other possibilities.

The more often she came back, the more he began to think that she was a reincarnate. It wasn't like he hadn't seen reincarnates before; he just hadn't been housed by them. His father's sons had been reincarnating throughout the millennia, always fighting, always dying by the other's hand - only to reappear decades later to begin the cycle again. Idiots. Father would be mortified.

If, in fact, she was a reincarnate, she was an especially bizarre one. Even when hiding his presence within his damnable cage just to observe her, she chatted on and on to no one, coming up with the most outlandish stories. She also grew smaller each time she arrived, looking more and more like the spawn of the devils that produced her: hair becoming brighter, eyes becoming bluer. She was hideous, looking so much more like her progenitors as time went by. The only thing that made him keep from figuratively regurgitating at the sight of her was the whiskers she'd inherited from him. Ha! Take that Kushina!

He'd never admit it, but if he had to continue listening to her inane stories, he hoped that she would one day continue the one about those space inhabitors: the heroic Darth Vader-san, and his nemesis, Luke Skywalker-san. Did he believe even for a moment that the latter was the former's son? No way. He was too much of a wimp and an idiot, to boot!

At least his idiotic vessel was smart enough to hate the village that caged them...

"So you'd like me to go to school?"

Rachel would much rather hang with her masked ANBU family, to tell the truth. Recently, they held a birthday party for her that was quite a riot. The obligatory bonfire took place after the mayor gave her yet another orange jumpsuit, and some of her "caretakers" had gotten hammered: (only the ones that were technically off duty, she later learned.) She'd snuck some sake, too, but it didn't affect her much. Snake had actually pulled her aside and offered her a little more, wanting to hear "more of that crazy lingo you like to spew." She gratefully took the offer, and Snake had pulled some of her tipsy friends into the patio area to hear Rachel regale them with stories and raps in English. Rachel wasn't sure why they found it so funny but was glad she could entertain them.

She received other strange gifts, as well. There were sets of shurikens and something called kunai that reminded her of her nephew for some reason. They weren't particularly sharp or dangerous, although some of her masked family threw them so hard and fast that they did split wood. Bear was especially intent on "properly training" her soon, but she had no real inkling what the training was for.

Rachel had always enjoyed exercise when she wasn't dealing with asthma in her first life, however, and her masked companions absolutely loved to work with her to learn various types of fighting. That was really fun. She'd be able to protect herself as she grew older, thanks to them! But going to school again? Pre-school, no less? No thank you!

"I will have to decline your generous offer, Sandaime-sama."

Hiruzen gaped at the cute blonde daughter of his successor. Her polite refusal to go to the Academy hadn't crossed his mind at all! The girl seemed to have a thirst for knowledge, even though she was just beginning to delve into books. It had taken nearly two years for her to learn to read, but she had started incredibly early for a child. She was a persistent little thing, too.

Her caretakers had worried about her ability to eventually read and write at all, as she didn't understand the characters no matter what they tried for so long. It wasn't until she saw a seal that apparently kicked in her Uzumaki bloodline that there was progress. Suddenly the little one "got it" and she had her head stuck in various books ever since.

"Why don't you want to go to school, Ru-chan? You could make so many new friends your age," the Hokage pressed.

"Please," Rachel jeered. "Forgive me, Sandaime-sama. But even you have to admit that I am universally despised in the village," Rachel ignored the man's wince. He knows it's true, too. "I would rather read or learn what I can from my fami - ano, my senpais, sir." Rachel blushed furiously: she wasn't sure how her caretakers would react to her calling them her family. They probably all had families of their own, though she never saw them. Of course, most of them are relatively or even very young.

The Hokage sighed but accepted her answer. They had plenty of time, after all, and he could order her guards to begin training her. He had a strong feeling that some of them had already begun doing so without his approval. He internally groaned at the thought. Not everyone took kindly to jinchuuriki guard duty, and the regular ones Ru lived with were some of the most eccentric in the force. Who knew how the Leaf Princess would eventually turn out with mentors like Anko, Genma, and Gai living with her nearly full-time?

That thought brought more tightness to his chest. His son, Asuma, had been another of Ru's favorites. He had argued with his son yet again, however, and Asuma bitterly left to take an offered position in the Daimyo's guard at the capital. He had a mandatory seven-year stint there, but Hiruzen had already spoken with the Daimyo, letting him know that his son would be required as a Sarutobi to come back to the village immediately after. That would bring him back in time to lead the newest Ino-Shika-Cho generation. The squad was traditionally trained by a Sarutobi, and although his oldest was certainly qualified to lead the children, Hiruzen deeply - but secretly - wanted his youngest back in the village.

Kakashi-kun had also left Ru's squad of protectors quite some time ago. What am I going to do with that boy? He'd thought that last Hatake was getting past some of his old wounds but now was worried for his sanity.

He couldn't imagine what little Ru had done to make Kakashi-kun believe that the demon she housed was influencing her, and perhaps even speaking through her! For gods' sakes: Kakashi had known Kushina's status, and he had been a prodigy, too! He remembered Sakumo bragging about his son's genius as early as when the masked boy turned two! How is Ru any different?!

Sure, she sometimes used gibberish, and it even occasionally bled into her speech, but so what? Hiruzen had been shocked at Kakashi-kun's assertion that it was actually the Kyuubi speaking: he'd nearly forced leave on the teenager. Unfortunately, the boy's talents were desperately needed by the village, so the young Hatake was put back all too quickly on the available ANBU roster. The last Hatake refused to be around or hear about young Naruto-chan, even going so far as to say he wouldn't allow his ninken near her. Ridiculous! It seemed now that Ru-chan missed his ninken more than she missed her father's only living student's presence in her life. How sad… What would Minato say, Kakashi-kun?

It was also terribly disappointing that Ru already knew how the village's common folk, in particular, viewed her. Even worse is that many of my shinobi see her as the monster itself, too. She'd have to go to the Academy eventually, however. Her father had forced the duty to protect the village as a shinobi upon her less than an hour after she was born.

Several clan heirs will be entering the Academy fairly soon. Perhaps she'll have more luck in finding friends amongst them. Their parents all knew Minato and Kushina to varying degrees.

He would just need to keep moving Ru to keep Danzo away from her for a little while longer. A relentless rival, as always… As soon as she entered the Academy, Danzo could no longer legally get his hands on her unless she was willing to enter ROOT on her own. And I'll never let that happen.

"Are you okay, Jiji?" Rachel immediately covered her mouth at what could be considered an insult again. "Jiji" meant old man or grandfather, and… Her eyes welled up with tears as she realized that she no longer remembered her grandparents at all.

"Only lost in thought, child. Oh," Hiruzen noticed the tears she tried to hide. "I guess I should ask if YOU are alright, dear one?"

"I just - I mean, I'm sorry I called you Jiji! And I - I realized I don't remember my grandparents," Rachel bitterly whispered.

Hiruzen was surprised and could only suppose that she had perhaps read about grandparents in general. "One day, Ru-chan, I'll tell you everything I know about your ancestors, eh?" He held out his pinky as the girl liked to do when someone promised her something. "I'll even tell you about your parents at that time…"

He continued talking, but what he said didn't make any difference to her at all. Would she even remember her real parents in the coming years? Who cared about whoever gave birth to her here in this stupid life? They left her anyway, and, and… She began to sob. Damn it! I hate being in this stupid kiddy body!