"Why are you doing that?' Ben asked, a hint of a smile on his soft face.
Mal furrowed her brow. "Doing what?"
Ben held his face in his hands and did his best impression of the vacant face Mal wore at the very moment. He tried.to over exaggerate it a little in order to get her to laugh. But she just purses her lips and tried to hide the amusement that was evident.
"You're spacing out," he clarified. Although his demonstration was self explanatory. "What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing," Mal lied.
Her husband obviously wasn't buying it. If his ugly snort was anything to go by. It was the one thing that really got on her nerves.
"You know we're always thinking right?" Ben said. "You can try not to think hut it's impossible. You're every waking moment is filled with thinking. So I ask again, what are you thinking about?"
She sighed, knowing that she had been caught. Twirling her lavender hair with her ring finger she explained. "Just about what I would like to do someday. I've always wanted to go to art school..." She closed her eyes and waited for the scolding. She wouldn't be able to do anything she wanted, she knew that. She'd most likely be dead.
Ben hummed thoughtfully to himself. Bit the reaction she had expected.
"That's a good idea." He stood up from the little table in their room and walked over to his desk and began rummaging through the top draw.
"What is?"
He came back with a pad of paper and a pen and laid them out in the table with a smile.
"We should make a list," he decided. "A list about what we would like to do in the future."
Mal stared at him as if he were insane. "B-but why?"
He shurgged. "It would be fun."
"But what's the point?" she asked. "If I might not even live-"
"We're taking treatment," Ben interrupted firmly. "The doctor said that there's still a chance. And while there's still a chance there's still hope. Hope for the future." He held out the pen for Mal with a bittersweet smile. She took it reluctantly and started scribbling on the page. She showed Ben what she wrote.
1) Try sushi
Ben laughed. "That's a good one," he lied.
She shrugged. "I mean...you didn't really specify what we could right, so I thought sushi realted things were permitted."
"Fair enough." Ben began to write one the paper as well, smiling as he went along.
2) Bring more kids over from the Isle
"I like that one," Mal admitted, taking his hand.
"Your turn."
She took the pen, more confidently this time.
3) Learn more patience for me friends, family and people
"I think your ok," Ben said frowning.
"Are you kidding?" Mal replied. "I almost roasted Carlos alive last Christmas."
Ben chuckled at the memory. "To be fair, he should never had trupwired the dining room. Anyway I got another one."
4) Take my wife on a formal date with no paparazzi and no fancy royalty stuff.
"No fancy royalty stuff?" she repeated grinning. "Is that we you call it?"
"What else should I call it? But that's not the point. I know that we haven't had too much peaceful "alone" time." He squeezed her hand.
Mal shook her head. "Doesn't matter, I loved every second of it."
"Still," Ben leaned in. "I want to take you on a proper date."
"Well, if you insist."
Ben smiled down at the list. "Want to do the next one together?"
"Sure, what do you have in mind."
Ben leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed. It was obvious that he was really thinking about this, and it gave Mal the impression that she should to. But her kind was blank at the moment.
"You know since college I've always thought it'd be nice-"
"What'd be nice?"
Ben held up a finger. "I always thought it'd be nice to have kids one day."
Mals smile dropped. Ben noticed.
"Is that not something you'd want?"
Mal cocked her head to the side. "I've thought about it of course. But...I'm just a complete disaster," she looked down at their joined hands. "Never thought having kids was even an option for me after my horrible upbringing. Id never want any kids to have the experience I had. And I'm afraid... I'm just not good enough."
Ben kissed her cheeks softly. "You don't need to think like that. Your incredible. And just because you're childhood wasn't the best doesn't mean your kids can't have the best childhood in the whole wide world. Because they'd have th best mother."
"You're lying," Mal guessed.
He shook his head. "I mean every single precious word."
Mals smile returned, along with teary eyes but she tried to hide those. She took the pen from Ben and began to scribble on the Future List.
When she was done she showed Ben whose smile widened. They stared at each other longer than what was natural. Mals heart pounding in her chest. She loved him, so much.
5) Have kids.
Mal looked down at the list. So far it contained five things they would want for their future. But the doctors words echoed through her mind.
Cancer... terminal... most likely she won't"Mal?" Ben snapped his finger under her nose to get her attention. "You alright?"
She nodded. A lie. "It's a nice list," she said, getting up from the table. "Too bad it's just that. A list."
And with that she walked away leaving her husband dumbstruck.