"Greetings, my Diamond! I am your new Pearl. How may I serve you today?" the Pearl spoke; luckily, Pink's headspace had cleared at least somewhat, so she could at least have a meaningful conversation with the newly formed Gem without having to ask to repeat herself every single time.

However, "somewhat" was far from "fully", and the potential for conversation topics between Pink and her new Pearl was still going to be rather limited. Just like she had absolutely no idea what her "preferred customization options" were, she also had no idea whatsover on what sort of actions her Pearl could do to "serve" her.

So, she groaned again.

"I didn't quite catch that. Please repeat?" Even from her very first conscious moments, the Pearl seemed to be rather insistent on certain actions.

"I did not... say anything..." Pink mustered.

At this point, something flashed through Pearl, as though she had figured something out. "It seems as though you are incapacitated in some way. Is the Gem Empire faced with an existential threat in the form of a war? Should I defend your, and the Empire's, honor?"

Pink was understandably confused. "Huh? I don't hear... a war going on... is there really one?"

Wait, was this the reason she had a cracked gem, a cracked mind and everything else that came with it? Because the entire race was under attack, and the attackers somehow managed to get to the Diamonds themselves? Momentarily, Pink panicked.

Yet, it didn't take long for memories to flash through her mind. Strangely enough, though, it seemed as though the memories were completely in third person, and Pink had to realize which of the participants of the memories was herself.

Looking at her own physical, holographic form, and then, looking at the petite figure arrogantly voicing her demands to the other Diamonds, she could definitely place that it was herself. And yet, she seemed so far removed from herself; were such a situation to happen right now, Pink just... wouldn't try and shout in front of the Diamonds or feel "entitled" to anything at all.

However, only a few more flashes of memory made it clear what had actually happened to her: it seemed as though she had destructive powers, and harmed herself and... her previous Pearl.

"No... I think... I did this... to myself..." she spoke.

The Pearl was immediately shocked, her expression too difficult for Pink to parse right away. Nevertheless, Pink still had something to add.

"And also... isn't it nice... that they just give me... a new Pearl... after throwing out the last one... when it breaks..."

"Huh-what?" the Pearl exclaimed, the sequence of words being completely out of left field for her.

Was it normal for a newly-made Pearl to act like this? It wasn't like Pink had encountered a newly-made Pearl previously in her life, and even if she had, memories of her would be far too hazy.

Nevertheless, the Pearl was shocked, and she needed at least some consolation, and though she might not have liked it or felt especially capable, Pink was the best Gem in the room to provide said consolation. "Don't worry... I will treat you... like a person... and not a toy..."

"I honor your words, my Diamond, and hope to be able to live by them. Until then, and until you expect me to do something else, I will stay still and watch over you." The Pearl spoke, deciding to take a seat next to Pink, who only lightly nodded before burying her head deeper and shutting out the outside world.

From her first experiences, Pink just felt like something was wrong and never clearing, no matter how much she tried. Memories would never be something more than a haze, she would always live in a realm of clouds even if she fully, clearly saw her true surroundings, and Gems would be thrown off by the sorts of things she did.

However, most important of them all was the paradox: somehow, simultaneously, she was both Pink Diamond and not Pink Diamond.

Factually, she was Pink Diamond. Though her memories now came in third person, there was no denying that they all focused on one particular Gem with a belly gemstone and certain parts of attire, and that was her exact holographic form as of right now.

Yet, in her mind, she felt more like a newly formed Gem. Already, she had noticed quite a few similarities between her and her Pearl, a known-for-fact newly formed Gem, and almost felt like the two were going to be good friends from now on, due to how much they stumbled when talking to each other and misunderstanding each other. The only thing different between her and a newly formed Gem was that a newly formed Gem usually already knew a designation she wholly agreed with, and Pink... didn't.

Indeed, if she wasn't Pink Diamond, who was she truly? If the usual Diamond attire didn't make her feel like herself, what did? And if the name "Pink Diamond" didn't suit her, what would she desire to go by, if she managed to have it her way?

Over the next few days, Pink's condition definitely improved. She was no longer so tired as to be unable to speak in anything but staccato, and the existence of cloudspace in her head proved to be beneficial, as she could close her eyes, retreat and calm down before addressing her Pearl.

More so than that, though, cloudspace was the perfect place to be if Pink were to truly picture herself as something else. In cloudspace, there were no intrusions whatsoever; there even seemed to be a cloud-based barrier between herself and memories, allowing Pink (or whatever name she would come up with for herself) to truly be herself and not someone carrying baggage of the past.

So, Pink wasted no time in trying to figure herself out. Various details of her new looks came to her on separate occasions, but eventually, they formed a complete picture, and once that picture clicked, a wave of satisfaction came over her.

In the real world, she positively towered over her Pearl and other Pearls; as the other Diamonds told her, her size, though minuscule compared to them, was still supposed to be imposing for the Gem populace, so they would listen to her. In addition, in the real world, though Gems could shapeshift, they preferred not to do so for as long as possible, fearing the consequences, which usually did not look pretty.

Yet, in cloudspace, those rules did not apply, and Pink could reshape herself as much as she wanted. Therefore, it was only natural to ask herself the question: what form she was actually the most comfortable with?

She allowed herself to reduce in stature, significantly, until she was only slightly taller than your typical Pearl. Yet, unfortunately, her gemstone still had limitations, and in order to be shorter, her build would also have to be thicker. She didn't mind that at all, though; in a way, thickness was its own form of beauty.

As far as attire went, the Diamonds as a whole were known for making it way too fancy, with crazy hair shapes and regal outfits. If Pink wanted to carry over the idea that she wasn't Pink or a Diamond, the easiest thing to go for would be a simple, single-piece article, like a white, strapless dress.

As for her hair, as much as it was fun to ruffle and otherwise play with and as much as it reminded her of cloudspace, it could be let down, rather than staying up and resembling a literal cloud. However, it tended to get pretty long, so she imagined it spiraling, curling, so it would only reach down to her belly.

Speaking of her belly, she needed to expose her gemstone; it was kind of an unwritten rule of Gem biology, if it could even be called that, that your gemstone needed to be exposed in a regeneration, for breathing room (even though Gems did not need to literally breathe). An obvious choice here would have been a diamond cutout, though, and yet, all Pink really wanted to do with this was avoid being recognized as a Diamond, so, that was a no-go.

If she allowed herself to picture a diamond shape, on its own, and then, spin it around one of its ends, and then, "place" it a couple of times before it returned to its original position, she arrived at a star shape. Yet, as she quickly figured from picturing a couple of them, star shapes weren't made equal, and it seemed five was the sweet spot for the number of repetitions: four repetitions made the shape too thin, while six made it too busy.

While she was messing around with the area around her gemstone, she also allowed the gemstone itself to be turned inward, and found that, neatly enough, the front facet, which would usually go on her bottom and face the floor, was pentagonal. That neatly complemented the five-pointed star cutout, she thought.

At this point, she didn't know whether she instated changes onto herself because she fully identified with them, or because she didn't want to be identified as a Diamond. Yet, a mixture of the two approaches seemed to be the best approach, and the last change was easily placed into the category of "moving away from the Diamonds", as it concerned her diamond-shaped pupils.

Yeah, she could just have normal, circular pupils. That helped her look less threatening in addition to less Diamond-y.

After this change was done, and after she completely pictured the entire set of changes, she felt like she arrived at the perfect form for herself.

She didn't need to bother with a name. She could simply refer to herself as "she" in her mind, just like she did before she figured out that she was supposed to be Pink Diamond.

For the first time, looking at herself, she could say that this was her.

"My Dia... who are you and what are you doing in my Diamond's room?"

Having heard her Pearl say these words, Pink snapped out of cloudspace and back into reality. She then looked at herself, and, much to her shock, discovered that she had accidentally shifted into the form she had just completed the design of; the first one that made her herself. In a rush of panic, she transformed back to her usual form, and rushed to speak: "Huh? When did you appear here? I can explain! I can..."

"Oh, it was you, my Diamond! That's a relief! It's almost definite that I crossed over a very illicit scene, something that no other gem should see."

"Yes..." Even from a few days and lots of vague memories, Pink knew that the other Diamonds would not be approving of her new form. "Would you be able to keep a secret for me?"

"I would be able to do anything for you, my Diamond."

"That's good." Pink replied, but inside, she couldn't help but feel disgusted.

That form of address, constant in her Pearl's chatting: my Diamond, my Diamond, my Diamond. Oh, how Pink wanted to just get rid of that and replace it with something else.

Yet, for now, she didn't have the slightest clue on what that something else could be, and what was worse, much like her true form, she would have to keep her true name secret from everyone but her Pearl.

However, what she could do, at least for now, was order her Pearl; they weren't known as "perfect servants" for nothing. "In addition, would you be able to stop incessantly saying 'my Diamond'? It's seriously impacting my ability to figure out who I truly am."

"I would be able to do anything for you, my Diamond." Pearl repeated.

"Wait a minute. Were you just telling me that you could do this action, without actually doing it?"

"Indeed I was, my Diamond."

Pink shook her head. "This new form... it's actually important for me that the secret does not get out, since, even though I haven't met the other Diamonds... I mean, I just know what they're like, and they would probably scold me, again and again. Do you understand, and if you do, do you promise to keep the secret?"

"Your secrets are always safe with me, my Diamond."

"As for ceasing to say 'my Diamond', don't bother with it. Truth be told, I don't feel like Pink Diamond, but I'm still yet to figure out what name I do feel like, so, like, whatever. Pink Diamond and 'my Diamond' work. For now."

"Understood, my Diamond. Now, if you mind, there's actually someone else who wanted to visit you, but I told her you were busy."

Having had Pearl say this, Pink momentarily panicked - did someone else catch her true form? - but nevertheless, she knew she had to get to these matters. "Oh? Who is it?"

"She refers to herself as a Spinel, and... 'your best friend'? I'm not sure what that's about."

"Yeah, you can let her in. I... I mean, I order you to let her in." Even trying to say these words, Pink felt like she was coming over an insurmountable obstacle; she just didn't have it in her to be mean to her not-so-perfect "perfect servant" like that.

Yet, once she saw Spinel, her gemstone felt warm.

Though Pink had a lot of dissonance between her memories and her feelings, this wasn't one of them: Spinel was a friend of hers and a partner in pranks and circus tricks, and she would stay that way, and if the other Diamonds told her to stop, she would tell them to get lost.

And though keeping herself secret from everyone but her was one of her top priorities now, nothing could get in the way of time between her and her best friend.