Chapter 4: The Red Room Files Monday, October 22, 1995 10:08PM
Pepper closed the file on Natalia Alianovna Romanova, Prisoner of the Red Room, with a deep and heavy sigh. Her hands trembled slightly as her mind whirled with the horrors she'd learned. She sat silently for well over a quarter of an hour before she slowly stood, and made her way to the dresser to stare in the mirror. Her face was pale, despite being covered in red blotches and her eyes were swollen from the many times she'd cried while reading it. She was still at the farm with Natasha, deciding to stay a few more days with her as she settled in. Tony had taken Harley with him back to the city, where he would first be drawing up blueprints for the Kidvenger facility, and then heading to DC to gather Nat's belongings from Steve. Pepper was happy he'd gone, giving her the privacy she needed to read the files. She didn't want him asking her awkward and personal questions about Natasha's life, which he surely would have, especially if he'd found her crying while reading them. Natasha had come to the bedroom she was occupying earlier that day, saw her reading it and quickly made herself scarce. She'd not seen her since which she was also grateful for, glad that Natasha hadn't witnessed her reaction to the things she'd learned, some - no most of it being quite disturbing. She hated the Red Room, and had it not already been taken down, she herself would have volunteered for the task. it was an evil, insidious, and despicable place. she could not phatom the way they'd treated the thousands of prisoners, mainly children, they'd captured. Her heart went to her best friend. Natalia had to be the strongest woman she'd ever met to have survived such an atrocious upbringing. She had good news for her, she did. She, at last, knew the identity of her son, and possibly, who might have him or know exactly where he was. Peter Nathaniel Barnes. He'd been born on August 10, 1943, when Natalia had been just fifteen years old, and James Barnes, twenty-six. Peter Barnes had been with Natasha for the first three years of his life, until it was decided in 1946, that Natalia was too emotionally attached to her son making him her biggest liability. She was sterilized, the Red Room deciding it was not worth the risk to allow her to birth more "liabilities," and her memories of Peter were erased. It had taken seven mind wiping exercises for Natalia to truly forget her son, it documented. She never forgot him though, thought Pepper, remembering that early morning years before when she and Natasha had become friends. Peter was placed with his father after being taken from his mother, who, in turn, raised him. James and Peter were both removed from the ward Natalia resided on a few months after it was realized that their sixth attempt had failed. She'd been in the cafeteria with Peter, a couple of prisoners and some guards. It had been the first time they'd been in the same room since they'd removed him from her months before. She did not recognize him at first, eating her meal as usual, with her son, the same son she'd killed countless times for, seated a few seats away. Madam B's ultimate goal had been for Natalia to be Peter's trainer. She was, afterall, the very best of all their prisoners and could kill every one of them if she wanted to. they wanted her to teach and train her son to be better than her, just not as his mother. The Red Room learned the hard way that a mother's love was one of the most powerful and dangerous loves of all. They could not afford for their best weapon to turn into a mother hen again. Too many risks. They were pleased to see that Natalia showed no recognition or interest in her son. They did not take into consideration, however, that Peter may recognize her. One word.
"Mama," Peter said, looking down the table at the red hair woman. She looked up at him, furrowed her brow, before lowering her head back to her tray of food. Peter didn't understand why she didn't answer him. He wanted her. There she was. The one year began to cry as he got up from the table and began making his way to his mother. The guards all moved as one, slowly, careful not to startle or alarm the Black Widow, making their way to both Peter and his mother. "Mama," cried Peter, his arms outstretched, reaching for Natalia, who remained seated, staring at the child. "Мамочка," (Mommy), the boy cried. (Natalia's POV) Natalia didn't understand what was going on. Why was he calling her Mama? Her breast tingled, hurting. She smelt something…sweetish. Что это? (What is this?), she thought, as she looked down and saw the stains leaking from her breast. The child was getting closer. So were the guards. She rubbed the wet patch on her breast. "Мамочка" (Mommy) the child cried for her again, getting closer. She sniffed her fingers. молоко (milk). The guard coming from her five o'clock was almost within reach of her. She focused on her tray of carrots, peas, rice, and beef in front of her, even as something stirred in her. Memories. Memories of back aches, of her swollen, leaking breasts; swollen feet. She remembered the inability to breath properly. She remembered pain and her water breaking. White light. More pain. "толчок, Наталья" (push, Natalia) Crying. Her baby was crying. Her son. "P-Petrov," she spluttered. The guard at her nine o'clock was closing in on her son, who was still crying for her. She felt her blood boil. Три, два, один! (Three, two, one!) Suddenly, she elbowed the guard at her five o'clock who'd just gotten within reach, hard in the balls, bringing him down to her level. A second later her arms were around his neck, a twist and he fell dead, as she quickly recovered his firearm and fired upon the guard at her two o'clock, then at nine o'clock who was just taking aim at her. Любительское (Amateur), she thought. Где они нашли этих парней? (Where do they find these guys?) BANG! Spin. BANG! Twirl. Punch. BANG! Kick. Spin. BANG! BANG! It was a dance to her, as eleven O'clock fell, then six. Three o'clock down, then eight and four. They fell hopelessly, no match against Black Widow. "Mama," sniffed her baby as she gathered him in her arms, hitting the last two guards in the foreheads and retrieving two fallen Germans. She quickly made her way out of the cafeteria, not knowing where exactly, she was going. All she knew was that she had to protect her baby at all cost. She had to get them out of there. BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! She fired in quick succession, her aim precise, and the armed guards fell instantly. Shots were being fired at her. Alarms were going off as red lights flashed. The child was screaming in her ears. People, prisoners and guards alike were screaming. BANG! BANG! BANG! She killed everyone in sight, friend or foe, they were all the same. They were all enemies if they were trying to take her son from her again. The thought infuriated her.. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Mercilessly, she slaughtered her way down the long corridor, picking up falling guns when she ran out of ammo, and again and again, they fell. "Черная вдова, отойди," (Black Widow, stand down), the voice of Madam B screamed through the intercom speakers. She ignored it. Madam B was the enemy. She was the one who had taken her baby from her. She allowed the Soldier to rape her. She did not love her. She made her kill Anya. Hatred such as she never felt in her life engulfed her; and enraged, she fired upon the speakers, then the cameras and finally, the guards, as she proceeded to the exit, leaving a massacre in her wake. Suddenly, she felt a prick in her neck that blurred her vision. Нет, не снова, (No, not again), she thought, as she removed the tranquilizer from her neck. She didn't know where it came from. Only she and Petrov were alive in the corridor. She turned to her left, stumbling, the tranq already taking effect. Through her blurred vision she saw the broken window down the adjacent, deserted corridor. Только один человек может сделать такой снимок (Only one person can make a shot like that), she thought as she fell, her vision going dark. She could hear her baby crying, screaming for her to get up, but her arms were too heavy. The sirens and alarms continued to wail loudly. Будь ты проклят, Соколиный глаз, (Damn you, Hawkeye), was her last thought before everything went silent. Pepper gasped out loud upon learning that it had been Clint Barton that shot Natalia in the neck with a powerful tranquilizer, stopping her escape with her son in 1946. She knew Natasha didn't remember, having all memories of Peter erased. She didn't know whether or not she should tell her. Natasha and Clint had grown so close over the years, their survival, shared experiences and escape from the Red Room a major factor in their friendship. How would she feel knowing that she'd almost escaped five years sooner and with her son? Pepper was at a loss. Debating on what to do she continued reading. It was documented that Natalia, after being tranquilized, had her memories erased for the seventh, and final time. *88*88* Madam B had then decided that it would be too risky for Natalia to have any interactions with Petrov, renamed Peter by Barnes, at all. They decided that the boy would instead train with Yelena, who was second to none except Natalia, when he got older, and solely by his father until then. There was an entire
section solely devoted to Peter's growth and aging. It was the most peculiar and unique thing Pepper had ever heard of. It was predominantly guess work of course, as they did not know for certain just how he aged. The theory, however was the serum, created from Captain America's blood (she'd already read how it was Natalia herself who'd stolen it) that had been injected into Natalia when she was fourteen years old, months before she'd fallen pregnant, was the sole cause of his slow aging. The serum, still working through, and transforming Natalia's system, passed to Peter through her DNA, which became a part of his genetic makeup, the results unprecedented. They believed Peter's DNA contained the "Serum of Youth", unintentionally created, but a phenomenon, nonetheless. Peter had spent the first three years of his life as an infant, developing and aging excruciatingly slowly. He matured to the age one in 1946. In 1961, eighteen years after he was born, and fifteen years after he aged one, it was documented that one year to Peter was the equivalent of five years to a regular man being that he'd only matured to the age four at that time. In other words, he aged one year, every five years. Their theory was that Peter should live to be at least three hundred fifty years old before dying, assuming he had the average lifespan of seventy years. The Red Room had been most pleased with this development, believing they'd created the "Serum of Youth." Every five years on his birthday, Peter was gifted with a series of medical tests and procedures as they noted every detail of his body's changes or lack thereof, followed by having his blood drawn, as well as his plasma. They would collect urine and feces from him, as well as hair and tears. They would have tried to collect semen from him had Barnes not drawn the line. Peter had been cared for, taught and trained solely by Sgt. James Barnes. James, as fatherly as he could, had him master weapons training; safety and handling, assembly and disassembly, aiming, targeting and firing. He vigorously trained him in hand to hand combat and mixed martial arts consisting of karate, boxing, kickboxing, Taekwondo, Judo, Kung Fu, Krav Maga, and Jiu Jitsu, which he began when he aged two. Peter also had a regular American grade-school curricular that Barnes demanded he taught him from. He also taught him all the languages he had known how to speak. Pepper was surprised, but pleased at the love, care and devotion James Barnes displayed to his son, and was shocked to see that he'd killed a number of guards for physically punishing Peter. It had been Madam B, in the end, not wanting to anger the Winter Soldier anymore, who decided that Peter's future punishment for failures would be, until he no longer cared, being locked in his cell with no contact from his father. Overall, father and son developed a strong relationship between the years 1946 and 1991, the last documented entry on him, which Pepper knew Natasha would not be happy to hear. However, in her personal opinion, James Barnes had tried to be a good father to Peter the best he knew how, and could, considering they were both prisoners of the Red Room, a brainwashed, mind-controlled sleeper agent, in Barnes' case. Furthermore, she was more pleased with Peter's upbringing than Natalia's. Peter had not been forced to kill, albeit, trained to. He also was not abused by the Red Room guards, sexually or otherwise, being protected by his father. In addition, he had not seen much death, at least for the Red Room. That, to her, made his situation more preferable than his mother's, even if his conception had been an indescribable act of pure evil, leaving two victims, instead of her previous thought of just one. She sighed. She would think about that later. She had to process everything else first before she could even begin to process that. What a tragedy, she thought, raking a hand through her hair, refocusing her thoughts on Peter. In 1991, Peter had aged ten years old. According to the chart included on his developing age, Peter would be turning eleven in 1996, and twelve in 2001.
It's a good thing his mother ages just as slowly if not more so than him, Pepper thought. Otherwise, she'd surely die before he became an adult, which the chart indicated 2031 being the year he would age eighteen. *88*88* Pepper sighed again as she turned from the mirror, thinking again of all she'd learned about Natalia Romanova. Natasha had not been wrong when she'd stated she believed she'd killed for the first time at Harley's age. Her first victim had been a ten year old asmatic, unnamed, (you poor thing) child, that had been kidnapped and donated to the Red Room, before immediately being deemed unworthy due to her illness. On the day of the murder, February 3, 1933, Natalia had been at the prison for just over a month. She is described then as being forlorned; having lost both her parents in a fire, quiet and withdrawn, solemn, distant and depressed, and also as "Тот, кто видел смерть" (one who has seen death). There were speculations about what her father had been into and what or who had caused the fire that killed him, because of Natalia's reaction to death. (Unfazed). Whereas the other seventeen girls, all under the age ten, screamed upon witnessing Madam B, a supervisor and trainer of the Red Room, slice a man's throat, Natalia didn't blink an eye. this immediately gathered Madam B's attention and she quickly called for the sick child, eager to see if her newest trainee was capable, already, of murder. After placing the sick girl in a chair facing them, Madam B asked the girls, "Кто думает, что они могут сделать с этой девушкой," (who think they are able to do to this girl,) she began. "Что я сделал с этим человеком," (what I've done to this man,) she finished, kicking the dead body of the man. The girls, looking horrified, all shook their heads, all that is, except Natalia. She'd looked calculatingly at the girl before raising her hand. Pleased, Madam B had beckoned her forward. "Покажи мне, что ты умеешь, дорогая," (show me what you can do, Dear) she said in a sweet, motherly voice as she handed the knife to the child. Natalia looked up at her once, before taking the knife and without preamble, driving it hard into the girl's jugular vein. She then handed it back and returned to her seat without speaking. To say the Madam was impressed would be an understatement. "Наталья, ты мраморная, дитя мое." (Natalia you are made of marble, my child,) she said from the front of the room, ignoring the other girls. "Ты будешь нашей черной вдовой." (you will be our Black Widow.) Pepper was horrified to learn that from that day forward, the other girls were meaningless to the Red Room. Their purpose there was nothing more than to be tools for Natalia's training. People to practice on, spar with and ultimately kill. By the time Natalia was fifteen years old, and becoming a mother, she'd already killed all seventeen of the other girls. The last, a girl named Anya, met her end in 1942. *88*88* Pepper had not been surprised to learn that Natalia's first sexual preference was female. She would never forget how easily she herself had been turned on by a few mere touches from Natasha. She'd known since then that Natasha was into women, which was why she was shocked when she found out she'd begun dating Steve, a few years after that fateful morning. Natalia had, at ten years old, known and made known her preferences, when instead of practicing her seduction skills and techniques on the males she was to practice on, she began practicing them on the older girls, resulting in several explicit encounters with them. Madam B had tried, unsuccessfully, several times to sway her protégé, but Natalia knew what she wanted: women. She had been opposed to men from the start, and vowed to never actually let a man penetrate her on missions, no matter what she
promised them, or how hard it would be to complete the mission without having sex with them. Madam B eventually saw nothing wrong with this, or her lesbianism due to the fact that, because of her determination not to have sex with the marks, Natalia had gotten so good in her seduction, that the men were bearing their soul to her after a few kisses and caresses. Natalia learned how to be an irresistible femme fatale. She knew how to walk sexily, subtlety advertising herself with every step;with every pause; with every bend; and with every pose. She used her voice as a weapon in ways that left men fully erect and drooling with her precisely timed smile, giggle, and laugh. She understood tones and undertones and how and when to drop hers delicately and sweetly; offering unspoken promises of bliss with just a touch or two. Her eyes and her lips tied as her biggest weapon. She knew how to use her eyes, batting, widening, tearing up, cutting, and rolling as the ultimate persuasion; combined with her superb uses of pouting, poking out, puckering, sucking, biting and licking her lips, causing men to fall weak, desperate with need. She was a master of seduction, the Seductress, as she was referred to before she began leaving a "Black Widow" signature card. She always, since the age eleven, completed the mission without shedding a single article of clothing. Madam B had actually been very proud of that fact, noting several times how Black Widow ensnared the mark with her web of seduction, leaving them dead and erect. People often mistook the dead, hard, most times- naked marks to mean Black Widow sexed them in exchange for whatever information she was after. Never had any of them felt the warm velvety folds of the Black Widow. Truthfully, only two men could say that without lying. One, he felt by force and the other well she fell hopelessly in love with him. Who she did shed her clothes for, however, was women. After messing around with a few of the girls, Natalia entered her first (and only before escaping) relationship at eleven years old, (Pepper, albeit horrified, realized and understood that eleven year olds, raised in the Red Room, were practically adults,) when she and Anya Vanko, a girl fourteen at the time, had begun dating. Madam B decided to allow this to go on unless such a time came that it affected Natalia's performance. Three years after they became an item, Natalia was forced to put a bullet in the forehead of her lover, the punishment for going easy on her in a sparring match. They were trained to fight to kill or at least severely injure. Natalia held back, significantly. Not only had she not been fighting to kill Anya, she was obviously actively avoiding injuring her in the least. Her punches and kicks were purposely mistargeted. She allowed herself to be hit and kicked over and over as she refused to seriously defend herself. (Madam B) This could not be allowed. Natalia must not allow love to get in the way of her purpose. She was raised solely to be Black Widow. They had invested a ridiculous amount of money into her being the ultimate weapon. She must not be deterred. Infuriated, Madam B entered the room, and without preamble, handed Natalia a glock and instructions to end her. "Любовь к детям, Наталья," (Love is for children, Natalia) Madam B hissed, as Natalia stood over the girl she'd slept with, just the night before, with tears in her eyes and trembling hands. "Сделай это сейчас, или я отдам ее Солдату-" (Do it now or I'll give her to the Soldier to-) BANG! The gun went off before she could finish her sentence. There was no way in hell she'd let that filthy man rape Anya the way he continued to rape her. Natalia fell into hysterics after pulling the trigger, crying horribly as she hugged and kissed Anya's dead body, apologizing profusely for killing her, as she told her she loved her over and over. Madam B stood over her, allowing Natalia five minutes of grief before reminding her that love was for children and sending her to prepare for her ballet recital that afternoon. Before exiting the room, Natalia turned back to Madam B.
"Однажды я убью и тебя," (One day I will kill you too), the fourteen year old promised her, hatred pounding in her heart. She'd been injected with the serum weeks after Anya's death, and a few months after that, she was pregnant. *88*88* Pepper also learned that Nadia Romanova, Natasha's younger sister, had been alive as recently as 1991, when the Red Room was destroyed. She'd been given another name and raised on a different ward from Natalia, with a different set of girls, as the second Black Widow. Her new name: Yelena Belova. Yelena, she learned, had also been given the same serum as Natalia, when she was seventeen years old, and had, before that, spent her life in the Red Room training to be better than her older sister. Yelena had been successful, going on missions at fourteen, and living up to the legend as the second Black Widow. Yelena eventually replaced Natalia altogether, when she never returned from her last mission in 1951. Yelena, Pepper had been disgusted and horrified to learn, had been raped as well, during her time in the Red Room. The reasoning behind the sexual assaults on her - reproduction. They had wanted to breed her, like an animal, desperate for more children like Peter. She had fallen pregnant, but miscarried, twice. She was punished for this. They declared her a weaker, of lesser value, flawed version of Black Widow, unable to reproduce. Angry, because Natalia had to be sterilized, and Nadia couldn't carry to term, Madam B oredered her rapes to be more violent and brutal, truly horrifying Pepper. Pepper was relieved to find that it was not James Barnes who performed the heidious attacks on the young woman. *88*88* What Pepper did find interesting was the friendship Peter and Yelena formed in the eighties. Yelena, a formidable chess player and Peter, a fairly good one, began meeting weekly for matches and over time became great friends. She wondered if Yelena knew that Peter was her nephew? Did she know that her birth name had been Nadia Romanova. Did she know that she had an older sister, that sister being her predecessor, Black Widow? The file didn't contain more on Yelena, only including one photo, revealing her to be a blonde, but with the same piercing emerald eyes that Natasha had. She also appeared to be in her early twenties despite being sixty. She and Natalia favored greatly and if they ever met neither would be able to deny resemblance.The only other information on Yelena was that her primary doctors were doctor Maksim Fedorov and his wife Adelina. She found that interesting because they were also the primary doctor of Peter. She made a note on her notepad to find the doctors. They seemed to have vanished after the destruction of the red room. Her guts were telling that Peter and possibly Yelena Belova had both escaped with Dr. Maksim Fedorov, and his wife. Pepper sighed heavily as she sat on the bed and pulled out the folded paper. It was the last document inside of Natalia's file that Pepper thought Natasha needed to know, and it was written quite recently. It was very difficult for her to read, her heart breaking several times as she did so. This document caused most of the tears that had her eyes swollen and her face red and blotchy. It was a letter. It was a letter to Natalia from Sgt. James Barnes. She unfolded it, as she re-read, again, his sad words. This letter alone was the only document or notations from the file written in English. She was grateful for that. She'd never translated so much Russian, the language of the entire document, at a time in her life.
October 10, 1995
To Natalia Romanova I know that I am most likely the last person you want to hear from. I cannot deny that I deserve all of your hatred, and perhaps even to die by your hands. Although there is nothing I can say to justify the horrendous crime I continued to do to you, because there is no justification, none at all, still, I feel as if I must explain. you deserve to know the truth, the full truth, no matter what light it paints me in. first, however, I'd like to introduce myself. My name is James Buchanon Barnes. I was born on March 10, 1917, to George and Winnifred Barnes, and later became the elder brother of three younger sisters, Rebecca, Wendy, and Susan. My father died when I was twelve, and I grew to protect my mother and sisters. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought I would do the things to you that I've done. My mother, undoubtedly, would find a way to return to life and kill me herself, if she knew. my sisters - they'd never speak to me again. I am ashamed of myself, of my life and of what I've become. I don't even know who I am anymore. I'm not writing this to garner your sympathy. In any case, we're way past that now. I just want you to know that I never wanted to hurt you the way that I did. I hate myself for not being able to fight them, to drive them out of my head once they've triggered the Winter Soldier. The Winter Soldier is not me, and yet even while he was in control I realized what they were ordering me to do. They led me to the girls' ward, and told me I was being given a treat. The other soldiers were excited and anxious. I did not know where they were taking us, but I surely did not expect it to be in the cell of a child. A child, no older than my little sister, same color hair in fact. I was disgusted, revolted at what I realized they intended for me to do. I refused. I refuse to go in the cell and rape a child. They tried to persuade me that you were willing, but I could tell at a glance that you were not. I had been with many willing girls- women, of age, old enough to even be willing. I knew you were not willing, and even if you were, that you were too young to consent. When persuading me of your consent failed, they tried to beat me or torture me or whatever sick method you call it, all for me to go in the cell and rape a child. Nothing worked and I easily overpowered them, killing a few in the process. Then they did it. They used the only effective method they had of controlling me. They used the trigger words. I lost control of my mind and body. I could see everything, but I was powerless to stop it. I tried to fight it, to drive them out of my mind, realizing too late that the more I fought it, the more I fought you. The harder I tried to break my mind free of it's grasp, the harder I took you against your will. There is nothing I can say to erase what I've done to you. There's no words great enough to express my sincere remorse and regret for the pain and turmoil I've caused you. I apologize with all my heart, and with everything that is in me, for all the sleepless nights I've caused you as you were plagued with nightmares. I know you have them, because I do too. Nearly every night I see your tears and hear your begs and pleads for me to stop. I hear your screams of pain as you tell me how I'm hurting you. I see the look of horror on your face as I rape you over and over. I hate sleeping, but I know I deserve to relive that nightmare over and over, because I was not strong enough to throw them out of my mind. I was too weak to fight the triggering as I violated you repeatedly. I hate myself, as I know my mother and sisters would hate me. I deserve love and sympathy from no one. I am no war hero. Am I even still James Barnes? I don't know. All I know is that I am a monster. I am a monster that does not even deserve to be living. But you, Natalia, you are no monster. I raped you repeatedly, siring you with my seed and yet, you loved that baby in ways monsters do not love, do not even know how to love. How could you love the result of such a heinous act so much? Your son, the one conceived against your will, mine as well for that matter, was born on August 10, 1943. He was called Petrov by you, but renamed Peter in 1946. I admit, it was I who renamed him. Though I do not deserve him, he is the only child I have, and I wanted my son to have an English name. Peter was as
close to Petrov as I could get. I gave him the middle name Nathaniel, after his mother, and the Red Room surnamed him Barnes. I know you would probably prefer Romanov and I made that argument for you, but your Madam B, would have none of it. I apologize for that. Peter was raised, trained, and taught by me after they took him from you. Natalia, I assure you, I tried my hardest to love him as I knew you would have. I made sure to keep him from harm and cruelties, as I also knew you would have. You'd killed so many for him already. Peter is an amazing child. He is probably the only thing pure to ever come from me. He is kind-hearted like I once was as a boy, with a strong moral sense of right and wrong. He does not know who you are as of this moment, not even your name, but I am going to escape SHIELD's custody after I have given your files to Rogers, and I hope to find him. I have a few leads that I dare not write, in case this letter falls into the wrong hands, but if I am correct in my assumptions and I locate him, I will of course, tell him exactly who you are. He already knows that he was taken from you because of your unconditional love for him, so that's one less thing I'll have to explain to him. I want you to know that I have explained to him the evil I've committed against you the best that I could to a seven year old, and instilled in him to never, ever do to any woman what I've done to you. I do not want my son to become a rapist. It is more than I can think to bear. As I mentioned before, I fully intend to give these records of yours to your fiancé, who used to be, a lifetime ago, my best friend. I know the Red Room erased your memories of Peter and I wanted you to have them back. I want you to be reunited with the son that was taken so crudely from you so many years ago. I believe you will be a fantastic mother, the best in fact. I also believe Steve will be a great father to Peter. Steve is a good man, extremely loyal and brave and I was most pleased to learn that you'd found someone so good. You deserve someone good after the life you were forced to live in the Red Room Prison. Steve was like my brother and it is my hope that he will raise my son as his own, by your side, and bestow all the love and loyalty he feels for me onto Peter as I deserve none, and Peter deserves it all. It is the same way I tried to bestow all the love and devotion I knew you had for Peter on him while he was in my care. Once again, I wish to sincerely apologize, Natalia Romanova, for the hurt, the pain, the suffering, the humiliation and trauma I've caused you. I will not ask for your forgiveness because I don't deserve it. I just hope this one act of penance would suffice for you, until that glorious day where I shall meet my end at your hands. That penance being, reuniting you with your son. It is the very least I can do. I will not rest until he is safe in your arms.
Remorsefully, Sgt. James Barnes
88888*88888* Pepper stood from the bed, and exited the beautifully decorated room, thinking as she did so, that Natasha really should have been an interior designer. She noticed, as she exited the bedroom that Natasha's bedroom door at the end of hall, was opened. she turned and headed in that direction. Natasha was laying in bed beneath the covers listening to soft classical music. Her eyes were opened and a pregnancy book lay opened, face down. Pepper entered without asking and climbed into bed with her friend, getting beneath the covers as well and enveloping her in a tight hug. She held her for several long minutes, not realizing that she'd begun crying.
"You're scaring me, Pepper," she heard Natasha whisper, a slight tremble to her voice. "Is my son still alive?" pepper nodded. "His name is Peter," she told Natasha who smiled. "He's ages about as fast as you," Pepper continued, smiling as well as she wiped her tears. "He'll be eleven next year." Natasha couldn't believe it. that meant, if she found him, she would still have time to raise him decades perhaps before he reached adulthood. her heart soared with happiness. "Do you know Yelena Belova?" she asked. Natasha snorted. "My so-called replacement," she replied. "A joke if i ever laughed at one. she goes by the second Black Widow," Natasha shrugged. "That's how all that the Original Black Widow began. What about her?" "Well,"begaan Pepper. "Yelena Belova has not always been her name." Natasha raised an eyebrow. "She was once called Nadia," said Pepper quietly as she handed Natasha, the photograph of Yelena. "Nadia Romanova. She's your little sister." Hardly ever could anyone say that they'd seen Natasha completely shocked, she was a master at masking her emotions, Pepper however was one of those people. "Never saw that coming," admitted Natasha. "I've never liked her," she confessed. "Perhaps you should start trying to like her now,"said Pepper. "My guts are telling me that Peter and Yelena are together, and that they escaped with a Dr. Maksim Fedorova and his wife when you and Steve brought down the Red Room." Natasha's head jerked up, her eyes locking on Pepper's widening in horror. "Are you telling me that my son had been in the Red Room until 1991?"she asked. Pepper nodded. "Oh my god,"whispered Natalia, going into shock again, rocking back and forth. "Hey," Pepper swatted her and snapped her fingers in front of her several times. "Come back, Natasha," she said loudly. "I was there," whispered Natalia. "I saw so many children. If i'd known…"she trailed off. "It's not your fault,"said Pepper. She hesitated then pulled Barnes' letter from her robe pocket. "I think you should read this now,"she said quietly, handing it to her. "I'm right here as your support. Read the whole thing,"she said. Nodding, Natasha took the letter, unfolded it, and began reading.
88888*88888*