AN : Hey! I'm back :)

Thank you so much for following this story, for your kudos and for your comments
Keep telling me what you think of this story and what your theories are. I'd love to hear your inputs.

I hope everyone's okay and that you're ready for this new chapter.

Chapter 4

Alicia and Raquel walked towards the parking lot in silence. Raquel let out a couple of complains and sighed heavily just to let Alicia know that she disapproved of her decision but did nothing to not follow her. It was more to make a statement than to mirror her true feelings. Truth was she saw an opportunity to learn more about Alicia and what had happened months ago. She finally had some alone time with the redhead and hoped that some of her questions would be answered by the time she got home.

The redhead was in front of her, leading the way to her car. Raquel was a bit behind, writing a text : Hey Ana, I hope your date is going well. Sorry, change of plans. I won't be able to meet you tonight, I'll explain everything in the morning. See you tomorrow. She prepared a similar one to Hugo just to let him now how the game had went and to tell him she'd call him the next day. She didn't want to worry any of them by explaining the situation in more details, knowing that she would probably never hear the end of it.

Her face was killing her and she couldn't wait for Ana to come pick her up or for Hugo to start apologising for being away. Raquel just wanted to go home, take a couple painkillers and fall asleep, her face covered by an ice pack. Picking up the pace, she pressed send to both of her texts and buried her phone in her bag.

She let her eyes trail on the silhouette that was ahead of her. Alicia's traditional high ponytail was tumbling on her back and the evening lights contrasted beautifully with the redness of her hair. Raquel wondered what it would feel like to run her fingers through them. Her eyes fell down on Alicia's hips that swayed lightly with each step she took. A blush appeared on her cheeks when she remembered how she used to stroke them with the tips of her fingers when they were both lying in bed. God, she was so beautiful.

Alicia must have felt Raquel's eyes on her because she suddenly turned around with piercing eyes and pursed lips.

"What are you doing back there? Come on, keep up." she ushered with a patronising tone.

"Don't tell me what to do". Raquel replied, annoyed.

She tried to send her an angry look with her only eye opened but Alicia didn't look impressed.

"You might want to try that again in a couple weeks, when your eyes is healed. Right now, it just looks ridiculous."

"Oh, bite me."

Alicia's laugh pierced through the silence and Raquel sighed one more time. At least their ability to bicker all the time was not something any of them had forgotten. The redhead stopped, crossed her arms and waited for Raquel to quickened her pace, only resuming her walk when they were side by side.

Raquel shook her head, erasing the tempting thoughts she previously had. After all this time and despite the deep-rooted anger she felt towards Alicia, she still couldn't keep her eyes off of her. The lust was greater than her will. She still admired her, trying to figure out what was going inside her heart and stomach.

Or maybe it was just the result of the mild concussion she probably had. Yep, that must have been it.

The night hadn't settled down yet but the evening was cooler. Raquel shivered when a cold breeze blew past them and goosebumps started to appear on her forearms. She hadn't had the chance to change when she was in the locker, too busy cleaning up the mess that her nose and eyes had made. She was still dressed with her jersey and gym short. Alicia noticed.

"Don't you have a hoodie or a jacket or something?" She asked.

"Yes. Somewhere inside my bag." Raquel replied. "But I don't want to put blood all over it. I'll be fine once we're in the car."

"We're almost there." Alicia said, pointing at a red car on the parking lot.

She unlocked it and both of them took place inside. Alicia turned on the engine and started to adjust the temperature. Raquel sent her a knowing look and it was enough for the other girl to understand that she was grateful. They didn't say a word until the car had left the university.

As if they were now on solid and neutral ground, Raquel threw a quick glance at Alicia whose eyes were focus on the road ahead.

"Thank you for your help" finally said Raquel with a low voice. The redhead made a face and shrugged, uncomfortable.

"Don't make such a big deal out of it". Alicia replied scrunching her nose.

Raquel let out a small laugh. In all the way Alicia could have reacted to this, this was the most Alicia-like sort of answer. She still had a hard time with small gesture of affection, even as basic as a thank you. Looking at Alicia, Raquel saw that the redhead had put her poker face back on. A simple "thank you" had triggered in her the need to build her walls up.

Raquel didn't know if that fact amused her or if she felt bad for the redhead. Why was she like that? Who had made her like that? Those questions had always been denied of answers and Raquel knew that the mystery would not be lifted tonight.

But she could still make Alicia more comfortable.

"But don't ever go behind my back again and make decision on my behalf." Raquel added with a tougher voice. Weirdly, Alicia seemed to relax at Raquel's annoyed voice. "You were out of place telling the coach you were driving me home. That should have been my decision. You didn't even asked me."

"You would have said no." smirked Alicia.

"Still, that doesn't excuse what you did." argued Raquel, not willing to let Alicia win this one.

She had appreciated her concern but her approach had been wrong and hurtful. She was a big girl, she didn't need anyone baby-sitting her. And that's what the redhead had done. She had went behind her back making all the decision for her. If she had wanted to ask Alicia for help, she would have done it. Or maybe not. But it still would have been her call. Alicia had devoid her of that. Just because she had accepted Alicia's offer to go home with her didn't mean she appreciated it.

"I know how to take care of myself. I don't need you for that."

"Ok I get it." Simply answered Alicia. "I'll work on that"

Raquel tilted her head and her eyes flickered to the window. That wasn't exactly an apology but knowing Alicia it was as far as it would get. She accepted it.

"Does it still hurt?" asked Alicia after a couple of minute of silence, shooting a quick glance at Raquel's face.

"My whole cheek is burning up and I'm pretty sure half of my face has turned purple but it's manageable." She responded. "That ice pack is sounding better and better by the minute though."

Alicia scoffed and concentrated back on the road. The silence settled in again and Raquel looked out the window, pressing her cheeks against the cold glass. She closed her eyes for a second, taking the cool sensation all in. It felt so good.

Outside, the street of Madrid were crowded and from the car window, it all felt surreal. Raquel smiled. She loved how lively this city could be. She wanted to be out there, enjoying a cool glass of wine or sangria while chatting with some friends. She could hear the loud vibration of some music somewhere far away and her mind got lost in the rhythm of the beat. She wanted to go dancing.

When the car took a turn, she leaned back in her seat and frowned.

"Wait, you remember where I live?" she asked as she recognised the venture of the cafe she went to every weekend to get her morning coffee.

"Well, of course." Alicia answered. There was a pause. "You haven't moved, have you?" added Alicia quickly, looking at Raquel.

The brunette shook her head. "No, I haven't".

Her voice had softened and she felt a wave of affection flow in her core. It might have been nothing but the thought that Alicia hadn't forgotten her place brought a moment of peace into her. But then, at this new understanding, she felt something break in her heart. If Alicia had cared enough to remember where she was living, why hadn't she come sooner to see her?

She turned her gaze back on Alicia's face, fixing her. As usual, she couldn't find any answers there. Her lines were softer than earlier in the locker room as if the current situation was soothing her but there wasn't more to it. Raquel let out a disappointed sigh and turned to the window again to hide the pain in her eyes. She had dreamed so often of opening her door one morning and find Alicia on the other side that the mere thought that it could have happened was tearing her apart.

"Alicia, where were you for the last 8 months?"

Her voice was soft and low. It could have been a plea.

On her left, she felt the redhead's body stiffened. Her fingers tightened against the steering wheel and her knuckles turned white. A cold shadow passed on her face. The question was as frightening for Alicia as the answer was to Raquel. And that reaction didn't ease the brunette. She was stepping on dangerous ground. Alicia's eyes flickered up and to the right. From her psychology class, Raquel remembered that it was what people usually did when they were creating a lie.

"I thought you knew…" Alicia finally said with an intriguing voice.

"Knew what?" Raquel asked quickly not knowing what to expect.

"Everybody at school knows. I got caught by the police for dealing drugs."

Raquel stopped for a second, staring at Alicia. Then, she bursted out of laughter. Her laugh quickly turned into a high shriek as the pain radiated from her cheek. It took her a second to calm down and to get her serious look back on. Alicia was still looking at her, glistening eyes and a warm smile on her lips. She was proud to finally get a laughter out of the brunette. She wished she could hear more.

"Come on Alicia. I know that's not true." Raquel retorted.

Alicia gave her an inquisitive look. "And how do you know that?"

Raquel stopped for a second and scanned Alicia's eyes. Could it be true? She tried squinting but the pain reminded Raquel that she would have to try that later too. Alicia was good at making her doubt the things that she believed in -or didn't believed.

"I may not know a lot of things about you Alicia…" Raquel started. "But I know you enough to know that you are not a drug dealer."

Next to her, the redhead cracked a satisfied smile.

"What do you really know about me?" Alicia asked.

For a second Raquel wondered what game she was playing at with such a question. This was a dangerous territory. If Alicia remembered her adress, Raquel remembered a lot more things about Alicia.

"I know you're one year older than me and that you want to join the police force at the end of the year. You like drinking black coffee in the morning but you usually settles for something sweeter during the afternoon. Listening to rock music usually puts you in a good mood and you love to dance when you think nobody's watching."

She could have added that she knew what Alicia smelled like, a blend of citrus and bergamot with a note of something that was intrinsically Alicia and that she also knew that there was this spot at the base of her throat that usually sent her off the edge but Raquel decided to keep that information to herself.

"Looks like you got me figured out", Alicia whispered without looking at Raquel.

"No, I don't."

Raquel had all these informations about Alicia, her soft spots and her pet peeves but there was more things that she didn't know. She didn't know where Alicia came from and were she had grew up. Did she have siblings? Did she get along with her family? That she didn't know. She didn't know either what she liked doing as a hobby or who had been her first love. She certainly didn't know what Alicia thought about her and what was her take on the relationship they had had month ago. She ignored who she was to Alicia and why she was being so nice to her.

"I know nothing that matters, Alicia." Raquel concluded. "But I know enough to know that what you told me is a lie."

She looked deeply into Alicia's eyes, challenging her into adding something. But the redhead stayed silent, doing what she had always done, taking the information in without letting out too much.

"I'm gonna ask again and this time I want an honest answer, Alicia." Raquel insisted. "Where were you for the last 8 months?"

The redhead avoided Raquel's eyes, her stare flickering out of the window. The car lost speed and stopped.

"That's for another time." Alicia finally said, putting the car on park. "We're here."

Raquel noticed a sigh in her voice, accompanied by a tiny sign of regret. They both wished the car drive would have last longer. Not ready to go out yet, Raquel turned to face Alicia.

"Answer me, please."

"Sorry Raquel. I won't discuss that with you tonight." Alicia replied firmly.

Raquel could feel the frustration growing inside her. She had felt so close to the goal. A couple more minutes and she might have know the truth. Leaning forward, she saw the front door of the apartment on the other side of the street and for a moment, she wondered if she should invite Alicia inside to continue this conversation. She wouldn't have too much trouble arguing her case if she talked about how she could still pass out from her mild concussion.

"I'm not going in." Alicia concluded. It was like the redhead had read her mind.

"I wasn't go—" Raquel started lying but she stopped halfway, noticing Alicia's cock eyebrow. She hated how Alicia could see right through her.

With an amused smiled, Raquel gathered her stuff. She was ready to leave the car but halted herself at the last second, turning around to face Alicia.

"I'll find out the truth eventually, you know." Raquel said with a confident and steady voice.

"I know you will." Alicia responded, resigned. "But until then, good luck with that". She added a small wink and that was Raquel's signal to leave the car.

Thanking her for the ride, the brunette jogged to the door of her apartment. Just before closing it behind her, she threw a last longing look at the redhead who was still staring at her in her car.

The next day, Raquel woke up feeling groggy due to the painkillers she had taken the night before. Her mouth was dry and the right side of her face was still hurting like hell. The ice pack that was stuck to her face wasn't cold anymore and felt weird against her skin. She grimaced at the weird sensation before stretching her arm and putting it on her nightstand. She fumbled for a couple seconds and grabbed her phone. Her eyes flickered at the harsh light before adjusting. She had a couple of texts from Ana and Julia and a missing call from Hugo. She still had a bit of time before starting to get ready for her first class.

Propping herself up on her elbow, she started by listening to Hugo's voicemail.

"Hey love, I saw your text, I hope you're okay." Raquel smiled, glad to hear his voice. "I wish I could be there to take care of you. I can't wait for this week to be over so we can spend some time together this weekend."

Raquel smiled at that thought. She was missing him. The voicemail ended. She thought about last night for a minute and felt guilty for having considered inviting Alicia in. She shook her head at that thought and listened to the voicemail one more time in order to push that thought even further away.

While brushing her teeth, she read Julia's text saying that their basketball team had won. Raquel replied with lots of emojis, glad to hear the good news. She couldn't wait for their next practice and the next game.

She ended up reading Ana's text over breakfast. Her friends had spent a nice evening but was worried for her. She dialled her number and waited for her friend to pick up. The voice at the other side of the line was low, like a whisper.

"Hey Ana, it's Raquel."

"Oh my god, Raquel. Are you okay? What happened?" Ana muttered.

"I got injured during the game. Nothing dramatic, I'm fine." Raquel explained quickly, hoping her friend wouldn't overreact. "Alicia drove me home."

"Alicia?"

"Yeah. I'll tell you all about it." Raquel promised, not willing to keep anymore secrets from her friend when it concerned Alicia. "Hey, where are you?" Raquel finally asked, inquisitive.

The faint voice of her friend and the sound of rustling bedsheet brought a smile to the brunette's lips before Ana had even time to answer.

"I'm still at Matias' house. I spent the night." Ana whispered and Raquel knew she was blushing and grinning on the other side of the line.

"I knew it!" Raquel squeaked. "Good for you. I guess the date went well, then."

"Yeah, it was awesome. He's such a great guy. I'll catch you up when I'll see you."

"Wait, you're still coming to class, right?" Raquel asked, full of hope.

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay, cool, because I could use a ride. Can you come pick me up?" Raquel asked.

"I'll be there in 20."

They hang up. In a matter of minutes, Raquel got dressed and went into her bathroom. She made a face seeing the right side of her face all bruised up. The swollen was gone but the whole area had started turning purple and clearly, it wasn't pretty. She popped a couple of painkiller in her hand and swallowed them with a glass of water, hoping that the effect of the pills would work soon. It was going to be a long day.

She was ready to leave her apartment when she heard a vibrating noise coming from her phone. It was Alicia. "Do you need a ride?" She read. Looking at the text and thinking about last night, she couldn't help but smile. It had felt so nice spending time with her, acting like they always had. It was clear from both side that they still cared about each other, each in their own way.

Trying to decide on how to respond, Raquel opened the conversation and paused for a moment.

They were all here, all the messages she had sent to Alicia over the last 8 months. All of them, devoid of answer like a long and dramatic monologue waiting to be proclaimed. She thought she had deleted them but the conversation had just been buried in the long list of people that weren't in her life anymore. As she scrolled up, she could feel the longing and the hurt crawl back inside of her. This is what she had felt during all these months. As she reread them, the pain got so great she had to remember to breathe. The rush of memories was ripping her heart apart. This was how much Alicia had hurt her.

Raquel's throat tightens. How had she forgotten all that? One evening with Alicia had been enough to put her broken and angry heart in the back of her mind. It had felt nice and easy to talk and joke with her as she was used to that she had almost forgiven her for all that. It had been so soothing and pleasant to graze with her fingertips all of what they were before.

But was she really ready to give Alicia another chance? The girl was so full of secrets, locked doors and unanswered questions. She hadn't even apologised yet. Raquel put her phone down, clenching the countertop as to not fall down. When she was sure that her knees weren't going to let her down, she stepped away, releasing the breath she had been holding. She looked up to the mirror as if to seek an answer in her own reflection. Could she go on like this? As if nothing had happened?

No, thank you, I'm fine typed Raquel on her phone before pressing send.

Her heart was pounding in her chest.

She heard the faint beeping noise of her phone. Ana was texting her she had arrived. Without giving it anymore thoughts, Raquel grabbed her bag and exited her apartment, grateful to keep herself busy with the rest of her day.

Ana let out a couple of swear words when she first saw Raquel's face. The brunette tried to remain calm and rassure her friend.

"Trust me, it looks worse than it actually is."

Her face was still aching but the painkiller had started doing their job.

"I told you you should stop playing basketball. These girls are crazy." Ana reprimanded her.

"Oh please, you sound like my mom when I told her I wanted to work with the police."

"Maybe your mom was onto something." Ana joked.

"Don't tell her that, I will never hear the end of it." Raquel chuckled. "Besides, don't you have something more important to talk to me about?"

"Don't try to change the topic" Ana warned Raquel but it was too late.

The two girls talked with a lot of energy all through the ride. It was only eight o'clock but Ana's optimism was infectious. She was so excited that Raquel couldn't help but smile and laugh as Ana thoroughly recalled every little detail of her date. Raquel shrieked at some uncensored elements Ana was eager to share before giving up.

"I'm so glad you spent a nice evening. Are you going to see him again?"

"Tomorrow night."

When they were done talking about Ana and Mathias, Raquel went over the game and the baskets she had scored. When she mentioned the incident with Carla, her friend couldn't take it anymore.

"That bitch!" Ana shouted.

Raquel laughed hard, touched by her friend's protectiveness.

"Yeah, I know. But I'll be twice as hard on her for the return match. I won't let her off the hook that easy." Raquel swore.

Then she went over how Alicia had helped her with her face and the ride home.

"Did you asked her where she was during the last 8 months?" inquired Ana.

"I did. Twice. She didn't say." Raquel replied. "I don't really know where I'm at regarding Alicia. It felt really good spending some time with her and I really want to move forward but I don't think I can."

"She hurt you and you don't know if you can forgive her if she doesn't ask for it."

"Yes."

Raquel was thankful that Ana didn't try to push it further. She needed time to go over the situation and decide what to do. Raquel didn't know how she felt. It was so easy to find again what Alicia and her once had. The chemistry, the laughter, the bickering that ended up with a knowing look that meant more than words. Raquel knew that being just friends would be okay with her. But Raquel was still very much angry at Alicia for leaving her like she had. She lacked closure on a story that still meant a lot to her - even though she never would have admitted it to Ana, Alicia or herself.

Raquel and Alicia had met the first year of university. For the first two months, they didn't really spoke. Raquel had found a friend in Ana and Alicia was a bit of a lone wolf. Even though she had noticed the gorgeous redhead, she had felt intimidated. Alicia seemed out of reach, like something on the fade. She quickly learned from other people that her and Alicia were working toward the same goal, for the same thing. Alicia Sierra was the only other people in the class interested in joining the police force. After learning that, Raquel's gaze softened when she thought of the redhead. Maybe they could be ally.

To Raquel's delight, they were assigned to each other for an assignment and that's how everything changed. Alicia wasn't just gorgeous, she was fascinating. She was smart, quick-witted and wasn't afraid to think outside the box. They argued sometimes, debating on diverse subjects and Raquel wasn't afraid of fighting for what she believed in, even if it meant facing Alicia. They completed each other on many things and were yet very different people.

Alicia was the one who made the first move. One day, during the lunch hours, she followed Raquel who was fiercely looking for a book in the library. She was talking passionately about the theories she had read while skimming through the library sections. That's when Alicia had grabbed her wrist, had pushed her against one of the bookshelves and had dropped a strong yet soft kiss on her lips. Raquel had been surprised at first, taken aback by this new desire she had never allowed herself to think about. But as soon as Alicia had parted, her hesitation had faded. She went ahead, wanting more.

For a little while after that, Alicia and Raquel only hooked up in secret during their "study session" at the library, during parties when other people had left or gone to sleep or at each others's place. They kept their connection secret, enjoying the unlabelled relationship they had and the never-ending pleasure they gave to one another. Raquel always knew that she cared about Alicia. That whatever they had become to each other, the redhead was an important part of her life.

But then Alicia had left, crushing every silent dreams Raquel had secretly hoped for. She had seen her worst fear becoming true; that she was just a naive young girl who had been a nice distraction to Alicia while it lasted. And maybe that was still true.

Raquel blinked, chasing the painful memories away from her eyes with the back of her hand. She had been able to heal in the past because Alicia hadn't been a part of her life. Her return had been hard on her, always wondering what was the right move. And she started to believe that, maybe, there wasn't one. The only thing that she could do was stay from the redhead.

With a simple motion, she got out of the car and took a quick look at the parking. Alicia's red car was parked a bit further from Ana's spot. The redhead was there, her back leaned against the car, having a smoke. A crooked smile appeared on the corner of her lips when she saw Raquel staring at her and she waved at the brunette, inviting her to join her. Raquel turned to look at Ana who was observing the whole thing.

"You good?" She asked her.

"Yup, all good" Raquel replied, with a weak smile. "Come on, let's go to class".

She went on, ignoring Alicia.