Baby Clothes Shopping

There was a knocking on your door. A knocking which you were choosing to ignore. Ignoring rather actively. It wasn't your fault that you suddenly had no urge to go out into the world and do all the things a reasonable, rational, normal adult should do, especially one who was going to be a new mother in only a handful of months.

"You can't hide in there forever, Ma!" you heard your son shout from the other side of the door, followed by another round of knocking on the door. "You have to come out eventually."

"My house, my rules, and I say no!" you snapped back, grabbing the edges of your blanket. You flopped back onto your bed and yanked the blanket up and over your head.

It had only been a week or so since you were "kidnapped" by Harley and the girls. However, the morning after you got back, you immediately fell into an irritable mood. You knew mood swings were a part of pregnancies (they ranked number 3 on Tim's "What To Expect From Mom's Pregnancy" list that lived forever on the fridge downstairs) but you hadn't expected them to be so...drastic.

Bruce had a major meeting at Wayne Enterprises that he couldn't miss, Tim and Damian were at school, Cassandra was hanging out with Barbara and Dick, and Alfred was busy buying groceries. Due to your recent "changes", Bruce was hesitant to leave you alone by yourself, so when he heard that Alfred was leaving for the grocery trip (when you lived in a household where your family dinners could go from six to ten in a matter of seconds, your grocery trips did not go by quickly), he called Jason to come over and watch you. And, usually, you were really excited about it! You loved Jason!

But, for some reason, you did not want to put up with him today.

"Ma, you need to come out and do something with your life!" Jason shouted, and you rolled your eyes from underneath your blanket fort.

"Make me!" you teased, snickering. Due to the unusual talents of your children, Bruce was forced to upgrade your door's lock so that way none of your children could pick it. As far as you were aware, only Bruce was able to pick it.

There was a click.

A turning of a doorknob.

Well shoot, you grumbled to yourself as you sat up, turning and glaring at your second oldest son. Jason stood in the doorway, a confident smirk on his lips and his hands placed on his hips. The little white tuft of hair seemed brighter than usual and he snickered at your pouting expression. "Bruce really needs to upgrade your locks. You do realize that we've all been able to lockpick these since we were like, what, fifteen?"

"I would applaud you and your sarcasm if I wasn't irrationally angry and upset at you," you huffed, returning back to your blanket burrito with your head facing away from Jason. You heard him give a sigh of exasperation and then felt the bed shift underneath you as he settled in on Bruce's side of the bed. He reached over and tugged the blanket down enough so your head was visible to him.

"Ma, you need to get up and do something, like grab a snack or go for a walk. It will help the mood swing, you know?" Jason commented, gently running his fingers through your hair, the same way that you did to all your boys. You hummed in appreciation and curled tighter in your blankets as a response to his statement.

"And how would you know what is good for a pregnancy mood swing?" you asked, rolling over and quirking an eyebrow at Jason.

"Bruce and Tim held an emergency meeting the other day after you burst into tears because your bacon wasn't as crispy as you wanted, even though you're a floppy bacon kind of girl," Jason answered truthfully. You winced. That had not been your best moment. Filled to the brim with hormones, you had just wanted to eat some food and then take a nap. However, no matter what you did, you couldn't cook the bacon correctly. It had taken a call from Barbara for you to actually calm down enough for you to be satisfied with your bacon and take your nap. "Dick, Barbara, Stephanie, and me all Face-Timed in and we discussed game plans. It was intense, like a meeting back during the Gotham Wars."

You gave him a look and Jason laughed at your expression. "I am not as bad as Black Mask. Your meetings about me are not that bad." You sighed before Jason had time to respond and unfurled yourself from your blanket burrito. "You're right; I need to get up and do...stuff. Like eat food...get baby items…"

You trailed off, glancing at Jason's arms. He was strong, maybe even stronger than Bruce was, which meant that if the plan that you were beginning to plan was going to go off without a hitch, it would work. Right? The only issue would be Jason's presence. As far as Gotham was concerned, Jason was dead and had been dead for years. They didn't know that he was revived by the Lazarus Pit, nor did they know that he was actively working as the Red Hood or living in Wayne Manor (from time to time). But you could come up with something to say.

"Ma, you have that look in your eyes."

"What look?"

"The look of you wanting me to do something that I don't want to do but I will do it anyways because I love you," Jason grunted, rolling his eyes. He leaned back against the headboard and placed his hands behind his head, accenting his muscles even more. Thank goodness your boys were built strong. "So just say it: what do you want me to do?"

You couldn't help the mischievous grin that popped onto your face. "How do you feel about baby clothes shopping?"

"I hope you realize how severely uncomfortable this makes me feel," Jason whispered, shifting awkwardly on his feet. "I hope you realize how much I love you."

"Yes, I do, and yes, I do," you giggled, rifling through the rack of baby clothes at your local shopping mall.

In a way, you and Jason had to go out in disguise. The public was unaware of your pregnancy as of that moment, and you had no intention of letting them know soon. As a reporter yourself, you knew how persistent the press could be and how relentless they would be once they realized that you were with a child. You would never be left alone. So, you two were disguised as a random mother and her son. You were back in the clothes you used to wear (before you met Bruce): a pair of baggy sweatpants that were not designer label, an old T-shirt of Bruce's that he didn't know you were secretly hoarding, a pair of broken sunglasses that had been given to you as a gift from Clark Kent, and a snapback hat with the Batman symbol on the forehead (you had gotten it along with your Batman pajamas as a gag). In all, you looked like a hipster soon-to-be mom. Meanwhile, Jason was dressed up in a similar fashion: faded jeans, white t-shirt with a red plaid jacket on top of that and then a leather jacket on top of that. He wore sunglasses that seemed familiar to you (maybe they were the ones that Damian gave him a few Christmases ago, the ones that he swore he would "never wear because the Demon Spawn gave it to him").

"This is never going to work," Jason continued, wrinkling his nose in disgust as you presented one outfit choice. "I mean, who wears sunglasses inside on a rainy day? Robbers, that's who."

"If push comes to shove, I'll just reveal who I am and then we'll be good," you told him, shrugging your shoulders lightly. You fingered the cute onesie that said 'Enough Talking, More Hugging' in a beautiful ebony black with red letters. Gender neutral enough for you. You grabbed it and put it into the basket that Jason was carrying. "Now then, we need to get an equal number of boys and girls outfits, and then throw some gender neutral clothes in for good measure."

"Shouldn't we be doing all of this a little later; like, after we find out the gender?" Jason questioned, following you dutifully as you happily browsed through the different sections, glad to be 'unnoticed' by the general public. "I mean, what if…"

He broke off and you paused your actions. You could hear the hesitancy in his voice before he stopped talking, and even though you knew and dreaded what he was going to say, you asked, "What if what?"

"What if the baby doesn't make it?"

You sucked in a sharp breath and blinked your eyes rapidly to prevent potential oncoming waterworks. "It'll make it."

"But what if it doesn't?"

"It will make it," you said sharply, wincing at the pained look on Jason's face. You licked your lips, bowing your head slightly. You glanced around, and satisfied that there were very little customers around you, you pulled off your sunglasses to look at your son. "I'm sorry for snapping at you. You brought up a reasonable point, and you're right. I should be doing this all later; it's just…" You looked away, wrapping your arms around your torso as you struggled to find the right words. "Our family stands as a symbol of hope in the darkness of Gotham; we protect the weak and innocent. You've all been trained since you were so young to be a part of this life. I wasn't. So, in a way," you paused, bringing a hand to rest upon your stomach which hadn't begun to rise in any way, "this is my part to bring hope to the weak and innocent. The one who can't protect itself." You shook your head, laughing. "That makes no sense, does it? I'm just rambling now, don't pay attention."

"It makes sense, Ma," Jason interrupted you, bringing a hand up to rest it upon your shoulder. You smiled softly towards your son, before grabbing him and pulling him into a tight hug. Although he was used to your actions, from life before and after the Lazarus Pit, he was still tense for a little bit before he allowed himself to relax.

"Thank you, my sweet little Jaybird," you hummed, squeezing him again for good measure before you turned back to your shopping.

You and Jason shopped for another hour in the clothes section, happy and content to pretend to be a random pair of mother and son rather than being the elusive Mrs. Wayne and the back-from-the-dead Jason Wayne. Surprisingly, also, Jason had a few good fashion tips; you shouldn't have been surprised by that, really. Have you seen your children? They all took after Bruce's fashion; none of them were ever dressed poorly.

The clothes were all picked and placed into the basket that Jason was holding, and the two of you meandered away from the clothing aisle and into baby toys and other essential items, such as cribs, car carriers, and high chairs.

"What are these things made of?" Jason asked, eyeing the high chair that was on display which was currently being abused by a couple of toddlers. You shrugged, following his trail of vision. The kids were really going at it, kicking it and knocking it over, cheering as they did so. "Depleted promethium?"

You snorted, shaking your head. "Try polyethylene. It's just plastic, Jason. Strong enough to withstand the strength of a child, I can assure you."

Jason still eyed the kids warily but he said nothing else as you continued to browse through the high chair and car seat options. But you avoided the cribs. Every time you came close to one, you deliberately pushed past it and went to the item right next to it.

It was your third time doing so when Jason stated, "Are you planning on letting the kid be 'free-ranged' or something?"

You turned around, slightly confused. "What are you talking about? Of course not!"

"Then why do you keep walking past the cribs? They can't be that bad of quality for you to overlook them," Jason commented, turning his gaze to peer quizzically at the 'ingredients' of the

You shook your head. Of course you forgot to tell Jason one of the most important parts. "I already have some stuff at home; it's scattered around in the attic and in the Batcave somewhere, I think. I know for sure we have a crib at home too." You paused then felt yourself blush a furious red color. "Right before Bruce brought home Dick, I...um...was hoping for a pregnancy so I went a little overkill. After I found out that I was not going to be pregnant, probably for a while, we sold most of the stuff and gave it away to charity. And you guys entered my life and became my new family."

Jason's head turned to look at her and there seemed to be slightly teary-eyed. "Ma…"

"Oh my gosh! Is that Mrs. Wayne?"

Both of you tensed up and you felt your blood run cold. You were doing so well. So freaking well without being recognized.

You raised an eyebrow at Jason, silently asking him if there was a chance that you were going to escape from this unscaved. After hearing another squeal, he shook his head at you and you frowned quickly before replacing it with a bright smile.

You turned around and, as you suspected, a small crowd was beginning to form. And, unfortunately, you recognized the person who was pushing themselves forward through the crowd to stand directly in front of you, their cameraman following right behind.

Vicki Vale.

Give me the strength, you prayed silently, not bothering to hide the wince.

"Mrs. Wayne! What a surprise to see you here!" Vicki gasped in fake astonishment. There was a sparkle in her eye, and it gave you the indication that she was lying. She probably spotted you as soon as you entered the shopping center.

"Ms. Vale! Lovely to see you here," you replied, putting on the famous Wayne smile that Bruce taught you when the two of you started dating. "Are you putting in some shopping during your downtime?"

"Not quite, Mrs. Wayne, but I can see that you are," Vicki chuckled, giving a fake laugh that honestly disgusted you to your core. "Is there a little secret to why you're shopping in the baby aisle? Is there another little Wayne on the way?"

The entire crowd went silent with anticipation, and you gave your best fake laugh. "Unfortunately not. A good family friend of mine is coming to Gotham soon and she's expecting a little one of her own, so I'm stocking up on supplies in case we have a little surprise on our hands, if you know what I'm saying."

The crowd chuckles good-naturedly and you resist the urge to high-five yourself. Excellently done, you thought to yourself. Everyone seemed to have bought your blatant lie.

Vicki, however, did not seem as easily convinced.

"And who might be this handsome gentleman who is standing so closely to you?" Vicki snipped, gesturing to Jason, who had drifted closer to you. None of your family particularly liked Vicki, and Jason had come closer as a subconscious defense mechanism. "He seems really...close to you now."

"As he should be," you snapped back, still maintaining your smile, but now it had morphed into a 'back the heck off, Vicki' version. You moved so you were standing in between Vicki and Jason, a visible barrier between the two of them. Your hormones were definitely on the rise again and you could feel your mood slipping into irritation really fast. If you didn't end the discussion with Vicki soon, you were going to do something that might cause a media scandal. "This is my family friend's son. He came early from college to help me prepare for his mother. Now then, do you have anything else you would like to take out of context?"

Vicki's jaw had a tic in it and you couldn't help the smug feeling that came into your chest, warming your soul.

"Now," you continued, moving to look across the large crowd and no longer acknowledging the fact that Vicki existed. "If you all don't mind, I think we all need to continue on with our shopping. It was wonderful seeing you all again!"

You waved happily and after a subtle elbowing into Jason's stomach, he waved with you too. And after that, you grabbed his wrist and marched yourselves straight to check out and into the car. You just prayed and hope that that wasn't going to end up in a fiasco.

"Mistress Wayne, according to the news, you're cheating on Master Wayne with a mysterious, dark haired stranger. Apparently, it is a very serious affair."

You sighed, rolling your eyes as you dropped your bags filled to the brim with baby items at the base of the staircase. You rolled your shoulders, trying to relieve the tension that seemed permanently stuck between your shoulder blades. "Jason and I got ambushed by Vicki Vale."

"I figured as such, Mistress Wayne," Alfred hummed; he was standing in the doorway between the foyer and the kitchen and he seemed amused by the whole conversation. "Do remember that if you do engage in said affair, please inform me so I can begin my daily route between the two houses."

"You'll be the first to know, Alfred," you giggled. You heard a grunt of frustration behind you and you gave Jason a pointed stare. "I'm kidding, Jason."

"You better be," Jason snapped, his brow furrowing up in distaste. "Just because Bruce and I don't get along twenty-four/seven, that does not give you the right to break his sad, little pathetic heart."

"Don't call your father pathetic, Jaybird," you scolded, reaching up to gently swat at the back of his head. "And I would never break his heart. I love him too much for that."

"That is good to hear," you heard a deep chuckle say. You turned around, launching yourself into Bruce's arms. His laughter rumbled throughout you, causing you to giggle as you buried your face into his chest. "I was almost jealous."

"You never need to be jealous, sweetheart," you hummed, moving onto your tiptoes to press a gentle kiss to the underside of Bruce's jaw. "There will never be anyone to ever stand between me and you."

"Wow. That is good to hear."

You were on edge in an instant. You didn't recognize that voice. You glanced warily towards the staircase; at the top of the stairs, where it divided itself into two different sets of stairs, was a teenage boy who looked remarkably like Bruce. He was somewhere between the ages of Cassandra and Jason and he was wearing odd clothes. They were made of a fabric that you had never seen before, and his upper torso was hugged closely by a brown jacket. You narrowed your eyes slightly. Why did it seem familiar...?

"Are you Mama Bat?" the kid asked, cocking his head slightly. He glanced around the room, taking in Alfred, Jason, Bruce, and then yourself. "Never got to meet you before. The rest of the family was super protective. Not very schway."

"Um...who are you?" you began cautiously, swinging your gaze between your husband and the mysterious child. He really did look a lot like Bruce.

"He hasn't told you?" the kid said, taking his hands and putting them into his pockets. "Not schway. Not schway at all."

"I was going to tell her soon, Terry," grumbled Bruce, shaking his head. "It's not an easy subject to broach."

"What isn't an easy subject to broach?"

"My name is Terry McGinnis," the kid interrupted, drawing your attention back to him. He seemed a little sheepish now and slightly embarrassed. "I'm Bruce's son...from the future." He winced suddenly and reached up to rub the back of his neck. "But um...not yours, technically."

You felt lightheaded. "Another one?" You sighed and faced your husband. "What is it with you and ladies?"

Following that, you promptly fainted.

A/N: Hey y'all, so I realize this is not the Wednesday after the last chapter was posted. To be honest, I kind of lost the fire for this story and then I started a whole new one that I really got into (One Itsy-Bitsy Spiderling {An Avengers Fanfic}, if any of you guys wanna check it out), so I'm going to be working primarily on that one and there will hopefully be some sprinkling chapters of this one. But here's Terry, one of my favorite Batkids! The next chapter will primarily focus on him and Momma Bats.

Onto reviews!:

Guest: Thank you! I'm glad it's cute!

LH Wordsmith: I'm glad to hear you say that! This chapter uses your idea, so thank you so much for that! And a late Happy Thanksgiving to you too!

Ju: Of course! When I got your review, I actually squealed and told my family that I had a reader in Argentina. They all thought it was super cool! Thank you for reading this story!

Anna the Viking XD: Good to know! That is the goal.

MadMaddyo215: Thank you!

ShadowedHand: They really do need a woman to help solidify them all. Selina Kyle in the comics does a decent job at it sometimes, but for us we have a Momma Bat.

Noel23: Definitely writing all of your suggestions down! The Bat-Mom writer you suggested didn't show up in the review, but trust me, I think I know which one you're talking about (and they're my favorite too if I'm guessing correctly!). Thanks for reading and reviewing this story!

Until next time. Who knows when it'll be, but when it comes, it'll be fun!

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