Harry smiles as the world stopped spinning. He was back outside and looked at the house with his vision still enabled.
Aura: Blood Protection
Count: 1
Name: Runic Love Aegis [Corrupted]
Class: Illegal Blood Ward
Type: Area
Variable: Parasitical
Target: Harry Potter [10 MP/s or MAX MP]
Owner: Albus Dumbledore (Corrupted), Lily Potter, James Potter
Harry blinked "Well, shit. Makes sense, go back in time and what I changed was reset. Guess I need to go wake up the Dursleys."
Opening the door, Harry walked in. It was quiet. Far too quiet. No sounds. Nothing.
Walking upstairs, he opens the door. No Dudley. No Vernon. No Petunia.
Harry scratches his head "oh wait. Yea. Deleted." and opens the console.
] id_restore Vernon
OK
] id_restore Petunia
OK
] id_restore Dudley
OK
The three beings in question pop into existence, wide-eyed, going back and forth.
Vernon, of course, is the first to react. The standard of bloating up like a frog and turning the lovely shade of fuchsia, "BOY! What have you done you FREAK!"
Harry sighs, opens the console.
]id_polymorph Vernon race: platypus
POP
Petunia screamed. Dudley screamed. Vernon made whatever sounds a freaked out platypus makes.
Harry just smiled
] id_reset Vernon
POP
Vernon was no longer puffed up like a frog. His color was also a nice gray shade of ashen. Much better.
Harry spoke up "Now that I have your attention, I need you to drive me to the platform to Hogwarts. Yes, I could get there myself. No, I'm going to be lazy and make you drive me. Yes, I removed you from existence earlier and left that memory so you know just how out classed you are. "
Harry looked around in utter silence.
Harry smirked "You may scream now."
They screamed. He let them for a few minutes. Then coughed.
They stopped screaming and stared as if their life was a joke to him. It really was.
In no time at all Harry was arriving to the platform 9 ¾.
Vernon got out, opened the door for Harry, his hand still shaking. Harry got out, Vernon ran to the other side, got back into the car and took off like hell was nipping at his heals. It was only Harry, hell would have been much kinder.
Harry glanced down as he followed the swerving car of Vernon's as it kept racing away. Harry mused "Huh, never knew the car could leave skid marks. Guess fear adds horsepower. Who knew!"
Harry shook his head and walked through the platform entrance, his belongings already shrunk in his pocket, and Hedwig flying overhead, no longer an owl, but more of a… well, it'll be fun when she arrives.
Upon entering the platform he's immediately glomped by a blond haired missile and his tonsils are being invaded by what could either be a 3 headed rune-spore trying to swallow his throat, or an enthusiastic tongue.
Pulling away he sees the bright, and happy face of Luna Lovegood.
Luna drops down and holds her arms wide "Insert your willy fingers into me and juice me up!"
Harry blinks.
Luna, her arms wide, blinks.
Harry blinks.
Luna, her arms wide, blinks.
Harry coughs "Uh, Luna… wtf?"
Luna frowns, drops one of her arms, taps her lip "I think I said that right. I want you to thrust in me and pour yourself inside."
Harry blinks.
Luna blinks "Is this the blinking game?"
Harry coughs and opens up the console.
] id_translate Luna language: English
Luna pouts "oh that's just not fair."
Harry blinks "Wait… did you just see me do that?"
Luna nods her head "I like how the console is in amber. Green is hard on the eyes you know."
Harry raises an eyebrow.
] id_show_stats Luna Lovegood
Class: Wizard (Seer: id: 195923856, llovegood) [because UNIX is awesome]
Level: 1
Int: 55
Wis: 70
Dex: 31
Cha: 41
Str: 15
Con: 17
MP: 247 [7 HP/turn regen]
HP: 134 [4 MP/turn regen] (Immortal)
Perks:
Seer (Permanent)
Forth Wall (Viewer)
Fae Inheritance (genetics)
Traumatized (Saw Death, Cursed)
Targeted Harassment (Cursed)
Evil Aura (Cursed)
Obliviated (alchemy)
Confusion (Confundus alchemy)
Forced Bond (alchemy)
Harry blinked at some of the perks. The Seer was obvious with her perception. Luna looked on, her eyes bright.
Luna spoke up "Harry, I…" Harry held up a hand "One moment." Harry was angry. Luna was like a fae moon shadow. A brightness around that would normally make anyone happy. The fact she was intentionally cursed to this level made Harry angry. And Harry was not a nice person when angry.
] id_identify target: Luna Lovegood perk: Traumatized
Luna Lovegood has seen death. She was intentionally left frozen as her mother was murdered in-front of her. Then her mind was obliviated to make her believe she was at fault for the death. The murder was Albus Dumbledore. The reason was Pandora had a gifted ability to break reality with her rune magic, similar, and to a much greater reduction to the console mode that is available to a gamer.
Harry blinked and glared, yes, A Bus was going to die. Oh so slowly.
] id_identify target: Luna Lovegood Perk: Evil Aura, Obliviated, Confusion, Forced Bond
Evil Aura:
Luna Lovegood emits an unwelcome aura that impacts all those around her. Any and all friendships will be eliminated. She will automatically be blamed for all faults around her. This increases potential bullying and will result in further mental trauma and destruction of her emotional ego.
Obliviated:
Luna Lovegood has a continuous obliviation around her memories. While her Seer ability allows her to see past it, it continuously corrupts and impairs her vision and recall into impossible visions and creatures of all shapes and species. This adds to her corrupted ego and super-ego fracturing.
Confusion:
Luna Lovegood has been corrupted with an alchemical formula that will continuously alter her perception of the world around her. She will always say and word things alternative to what she sees, which will encourage the disruption of any person to person relationships she has.
Forced Bond:
Luna Lovegood has a forced bond to Neville Longbottom and Ronald Weasley as a magical siphon and emotional slave. She has to do anything they tell her to do with 24 hours or suffer mental instability which adds a multiplier to her Confusion and Obliviated effects.
Harry Potter was now livid "Oh fuck that."
] id_perk_remove Luna Lovegood type: cursed, alchemy
OK
Luna Lovegood blinked "Oh that's ever so much nicer. Thank you Harry Potter."
Harry smiled "You're welcome."
Luna Lovegood opens her arms "Power me up, Harry. You'll need me along with Hermione."
Harry smirked "Luna, you know I don't need anyone."
Luna pouted "Poo. OK, power me up with Hermione to allow us to rape the world and make it our Bitch."
Harry grins and opened the console "You only had to ask."
] id_party_add Luna Lovegood
OK
] id_set Luna Lovegood flags: developer
OK
Luna whee-ed "I love console mode!"
(Luna) ] CheatMode 1
DENIED
Luna grumps "Oh poo."
(Luna) ] id_set dex 999
Maximum for developer mode is 499
Luna stomps her foot "Damn console mode."
**PING**
Quest: Can Luna stop being a whiny little bitch
Perks gained: Not-A-Bitch
Stat Points ga-
Luna closed the console.
Luna turns to Harry "Harry? Sweetie?"
Harry just grins, having seen the popup "Yes Luna darling?"
Luna glares "We must destroy the 4th wall."
(Luna) ] id_perk_remove whiney_bitch
DENIED
Luna sighs.
Harry pops up the console.
] id_perk_remove target: Luna Lovegood, Hermione Granger whiney_bitch
OK, OK
] id_perk_lock target: Luna Lovegood, Hermione Granger whiney_bitch
OK, OK
[forth wall] I fucking hate you both.
Grumbling, Luna continues.
(Luna) ] id_set dex,str,con,int,wis,cha 499; level 99999
OK,OK,OK,OK,OK,OK, OK
Luna blinked at the sound of multiple thumps, almost sounding like limpets. Luna turnes slowly, watching the window of Tom's pub and all the faces pressed against it, licking the glass and eyeing her like a piece of meat.
Luna screamed.
Harry sighs, opens the console back up.
] id_perk_set target: Luna Lovegood, Hermione Granger overlooked
OK,OK
The 22 people stopped licking the glass, shook their heads back and forth and left.
Luna continued to stare at the slowly dripping saliva patterns on the glass, and turned to look at Harry, her face can only be described as utterly pissed off.
Harry grins "Oops?"
Luna punches Harry in the nose. Her hand broke. It hurt. Harry's nose explodes in blood. It also hurt. Both healed nearly instantly though Luna continued to shake the pain out of her hand.
It didn't help that the grin on Harry's face never left.
] id_show_stats Luna Lovegood
Class: Wizard (Seer/Immortal: id: 195923856, llovegood) [because UNIX is awesome]
Level: 99999
Int: 499
Wis: 499
Dex: 499
Cha: 499
Str: 499
Con: 499
MP: 999999 [9999 MP/turn regen]
HP: 999999 [9999 HP/turn regen] (Immortal)
Perks:
Admin (permanent)
Seer (Permanent)
Forth Wall (Viewer)
Immortal (admin)
Indestructible (admin)
Fae Inheritance (genetics)
Magic Protection
Fourth Wall (Permanent)
Not-A-Bitch (Locked) [Fourth Wall – I hate you]
Impossibly Strong (admin)
Impossibly Smart (admin)
Impossibly Fast (admin)
Impossibly Wise (admin)
Impossibly Resistant (admin)
Impossibly Attractive (admin)
Seen As Average (Unnoticed Blessing)
Amuse me by helping Harry destroy the world (admin)
The World is my Oyster and I love Harry loving fish (admin)
Disgustingly Powerful for the Amusement of the Fourth Wall (admin)
Luna closes the console along with Harry. Luna grins to Harry "That's oh so much better."
Harry smiles to Luna "Welcome to the 'I'm going to fuck the world with a big goblin dildo' club, Luna.
Luna grins "Talking goblins, we should go to Gringotts. You won't be happy with what they did."
Harry quirks an eyebrow "Did they screw with my trust fault?"
Luna gives the evil eye "The screwed with the Potter Legacy. You'll need to punish them. Actually no. You'll need to fuck them for life."
Harry blinks "Potter Legacy? Wait…"
] id_history Potter Legacy
The Potter Legacy involves a history rich in founding the magic world. They were known as the first magic users, long before Merlin and the time of Camelot. It is rumored that the Potter genes were the first to inhabit the use of magical power. They are the founders of many magical artifacts and were the investors in what is currently called Gringotts, much to the hate of the goblins. Harry Potter was screwed out of his history once the key was stolen by Albus Dumbledore who with the help of the goblins drained the entire family legacy, all properties being liquidated, and all funds short of the pathetically small trust fund being left to Harry. The trillions of revenue were deposited in various death eater vaults, and the majority of pure blood accounts to give them the wealth and power to control the magical society.
Harry slowly closed the console and stared in-front of him for a few seconds, then raised his head and looked at Luna.
Luna looked in concern at Harry. That smile on his face wasn't natural. It almost reached his ears, and that cackling laugh, no, that wasn't normal at all.
Luna spoke up slowly, as one would a scared kitten "Harrrrryyyy… are you… OK?"
Harry grins "Let's go to Gringotts. It's time to withdraw some gold. Oh such a lovely day."
Harry was skipping to Gringotts humming a little ditty as if the sun was out and the flowers blooming.
Luna shrugged and skipped along-side Harry, humming the same song.
Anyone who heard the humming of R.E.M's 'It's the end of the world as we know it' would be concerned.
The goblin teller was having a bad day, all these damn humans stank up the bank, and wizards were notoriously stupid anyway. They were fleecing them of the worth of gold and they never had a clue. He was scoffing as he spoke up "Next!"
Harry Potter and Luna Lovegood stepped up to the counter.
The goblin spoke up "What do you need, Wizard?" he quite literally spat it, a glob of saliva striking Harry on the nose and dripping a bit off his glasses.
Harry continued to smile brightly, ignoring it entirely. Luna was snickering, she 'saw' exactly what was going to happen. It was hard for her not to just drop to the floor in spasms of amusement.
Harry spoke up "I'd like a withdraw, but alas, I don't have my key."
The goblin snorted "Not my fault you're stupid, you stupid human. Press your hand on the plate and it'll identify your magical signature for a new key, with the default cost of 100 gallons for replacement."
Harry continued to smile as he put his hand on the plate, getting robbed of the 100 galleons and got his key.
Harry interrupted the goblin "May I have a record of all my accounts and activity of the past 20 years?"
The goblin grinned "Of course. (handing him a paper) though sad that your current magical guardian has demanded that all activity past today be summarily destroyed and deleted. Pity that."
Harry continued to smile "How much do I have in all my accounts?"
The goblin grinned again "You have just the one vault. 20,000 galleons. No more refills. This includes the 7 years automatically deducted from Hogwarts, at the normal 3 times the cost for half-bloods, plus an additional 50% fine for early submission."
Harry continued to smile "I'd like to have all the money withdrawn into this bag please."
The goblin looked at the never full bag, which was used for finances and approved by the mages association. It was also entirely expensive. Which is why the goblin destroyed the bag "I'm sorry, that bad was not tamper resistant. We only sell those bags. It'll be 1500 galleons, so here is your 18,500 galleons. Is there anything else Mister Potter?" the goblin by now was not even hiding his sneer.
Harry continued to smile "Yes, one second."
] id_history Harry Potter type: vaults
Trust Vault: 20,000
Access: Harry Potter (Restricted), Albus Dumbledore, Severus Snape, Arthur Weasley
Refilled: Yearly – Defunct, Family vault closed
Family Vault: 1.2 trillion galleons
Status: Defunct
Access: Harry Potter (denied), Albus Dumbledore, Severus Snape, Arthur Weasley
Closed: Nov 1, 1981
Transfer: Albus Dumbledore, Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Weasley (Family – All), Black (Family – All), Malfoy (Family – all), Notts (Family – all), Greengrass (Family – Rejected and returned), Lovegood (Family – Rejected and returned), Gaunt (Family), Hogwarts, Ministry, Fudge (Family – All), Umbridge (Family – all), Longbottom (Family – all), Davis (Family – Rejected), Bones (Family – Rejected),...
Properties:
Godric Hollow – On loan from Albus Dumbledore (10000% interest, damage 10x multiplier)
Potter Manor – Sold
Lily Pad (Italian Beach Property) – Sold
Marauder's Hotel (Rome 5 star hotel chain) – Sold
Villa Respite (French vineyard manor) – Sold
Isle of Pottery (Bahamian Isle) – Sold
The property and transfer list went on endlessly. The only families who seemed to reject it were Lovegood, Bones, Davis, and Greengrass. Interesting on the latter. He didn't know Daphne while at school, but she seemed rather reserved, and he remembered overhearing how her sister was cursed to a bonding that she was even then crying over at home. He'll have to pay more attention this year.
Harry continued as he looked up to the goblin.
The goblin sneered at Harry "What do you want, human? You have no more accounts. So leave."
Harry grinned "Ah yes… about that…"
Luna mimed hanging by a noose behind her, Harry ignored her as he opened up the console.
Harry Potter started cackling madly. The goblin looked at him like he was mad.
] id_set owner Gringotts type: vaults exclude: Bones, Greengrass, Lovegood, Granger, Davis id: Harry Potter
OK
] id_execute transfer type: vaults amount:100% target: Harry Potter vault: Trust Vault
OK
Harry potter slowly handed his disgustingly overpriced bag to the goblin "I think you missed a few gallons from my Trust Vault. Please empty it in my bag as I requested."
The goblin become enraged "You already had your money transferred."
Harry grins "Humor me."
The goblin glared, slammed his hand on the transfer button, and the bag, which was created to hold an endless number of galleons, actually gained weight and fell out of the goblin's hand onto the floor.
Harry picked up the bag, put it in his pocket and smiled "Thank you for your time."
The goblin blinked, and looked down at the log of what was transferred and paled.
LOG: 1,205,258,968,992,295,159,259,208 transferred → Harry Potter (Trust Vault)
LOG: Harry Potter (Trust Vault) → bag
The goblin immediately withdrew his dagger and lunged at Harry Potter.
Harry Potter snapped his finger.
The teller space was covered in red as the goblin exploded.
There was absolute silence in the bank.
Harry was now openly showing how pissed he was.
Harry spoke up "You are all now totally fucked. I call you thieves. I call you dishonorable. I call you dead. As a being. As a race. As a life form. Reap what you have sown."
] id_time modify: frozen
OK
] id_set race: goblin reproduction: off life_expectancy:1 year
OK
Luna blinked owlishly at Harry and started to laugh gaily "You are an utter bastard, Harry Potter. I love you."
Harry winked at Luna.
Harry and Luna, both admins and god-mode in a universe time stopped skipped out of the bank and off to the train to go to Hogwarts.
Luna turned to Harry "I assume this time Hermione won't have her head crushed in by a troll club and have the entire school scoff at her death?"
Harry grinned a truly grim smile "Oh Luna, the world is bent over a barrel and we're going to be the biggest dicks in the universe."
Luna grins "You're saying they're all fucked?"
Harry smiles as he snaps his fingers, the time-stop being removed and time continuing on "The world is our oyster and we love fish."
Luna wraps her arm around Harry and continued on to the Hogwarts express.