They came for her as they always did – the nightmares. They snuck into her mind like the tides of the sea, coming in so very quickly and stealing her breath away. Chakra surged beneath her skin, mind caught up in the memories of that fateful war in which she had lost everything from her family, to her friends, and the rest of her world beyond.
She was there yet again, beneath a crimson moon, a pale figure of death before her. "No," she whispered, staring at the two figures standing between her and Ootsutsuki Kaguya. "Why does it always have to be this scene?" she asked, tears biting at the corners of her eyes as she leapt forwards, part of her always wishing she could change it. That was her dream. She should have been able to do something differently, dream of the ending they could have all had. Her hand reached out, teeth gritting as that familiar pale blur struck out then. Blood splattered through the air, warm droplets landing on her face and hand even as her fingers closed around thin air. He was already falling, already well on his way to death, and all she could do was fall to her knees and wonder why her mind was so insistent on tormenting her with the visage of Naruto's dying body.
A familiar green glow buzzed beneath her fingers despite the futility of it, whisps of healing chakra coming forth despite the futility of it all. He was dying. Of course he was. And there was nothing she could do to stop it. "Sakura-chan," Naruto croaked, blood on his lips, leaking down from his mouth as he choked on it. His last breaths were nothing but pained, wet, ragged gasps, and she could only watch as that spark of life in those bright blue eyes was extinguished for the last time. Though it would never be the 'last time'. Not so long as she kept on dreaming of his and Sasuke's death.
Pain pulsed in her own chest, and she looked up, hating and fearing those blank lavender eyes which stared down at her even as the hardened pale hair removed itself from the hole it had speared through her. Fingers cracked the ground beneath them as she stared up at the one who had brought her world crashing down around her. The pale light which lit up in a familiar, glowing diamond beneath the corner of her left eye was so very familiar to her. Ground rumbled beneath her—and Sakura snapped her eyes open, the world swimming in and out of focus for but a moment as she struggled to gather her bearings.
There was a ceiling above her, a relatively unfamiliar one, but it wasn't the sky above she had grown so very used to the past few nights. The familiar, if somewhat obnoxiously golden presence of her soulmate wasn't there either, and Sakura could only lie there for a few long minutes as time trickled past her like the sands of an hourglass. Plenty more time would trickle past her too, soon enough, and she could only let out a loud sigh and press the heel of her palms against her closed eyelids as though that could wash away the images. As though her hands could somehow scrub away the vivid memories of that fateful day which had destroyed everything she had ever known and loved.
Elves have long memories. Sadril's words came to her then, along with the whispered reminder that she would become more elf-like as time went by and she remained unaffected by its passage unlike the rest of her so-called kin. Sakura could only wonder if those dreams would haunt her forevermore or whether, perhaps, she might eventually find some closure in their deaths. Her arms wrapped around herself, bitter laughter escaping her at the thought of constantly being subjected to the sights in her dreams. Her nightmares. Scowling at the thought, she threw herself out from underneath the thick covers she had been given. There were so many blankets in that room for some reason, or so she had discovered on her brief examination of the room before she slunk beneath the covers and had subjected herself to yet another nightmare. There were windows in that room too, unlike the chilly corridors outside which more often than not merely had empty holes in place of the glass windows she had once been so very used to in another life. Because that was what it was at the end of the day. Her life had come to end that day, along with her world, at the hand of Ootsutsuki Kaguya. Now there was a new life in those lands, and a new chapter had been opened up in Imladris. And it was already off to such an auspicious start, she mused, throwing a small blanket around her shoulders, slipping on the soft slipper shoes she had been presented with, and venturing out of her room there.
The place felt far too small, and she knew she needed some cool, fresh air to clear her head and the festering anger which lingered at the reminder of how very helpless and useless she had been. Tightening her grasp on her blanket, she poked her head out around the door, peering from side to side to check the coast was clear before she stepped out into the silent corridor, closing the door behind her with a soft click. She padded over towards the windows there, open to the elements as that corridor was, the gentle breeze washing over her as she stood there, staring up at the moon and relaxing. Because it wasn't red. Because it was different to the ones her friends had perished under. Sighing softly at the soothing sight which reminded her of the fact it had been years since that fateful battle and that she was forever to be stuck beneath those stars which grew more familiar by every year passed. Another soft click had her turning to greet the noise and the person behind it.
His footsteps were quiet on the stone flooring, his skin almost seeming to glow beneath the light of the moon, his golden hair falling in slight curls, messy evidently from where he had lain down. Beneath the light of the moon, he looked the furthest thing from human. But then again, he is an elf, her mind reminded her somewhat snarkily. Sakura only wondered how she would look with the light of the moon behind her, pink locks on full display. She wondered how she would look with her Yin Seal active and glowing with silvery light. She had only ever used that seal once, and it had felt and seemed so very strange when she had – so very unlike her mentor's. Tsunade's. Chakra thrummed beneath her skin, and Sakura wondered if she too would seem to glow from the inside should she give up the tight leash she had upon it. One which made it run deeper beneath her skin than it ought to. "What wakes you at such an hour?" Glorfindel asked, those golden eyes burning into her with the force of a thousand suns. "I would have thought you required more rest…" he trailed off, staring at her still, waiting for an answer which Sakura took a few moments to give to him.
"Not all dreams are pleasant," she remarked, pulling her blanket tighter around her shoulders. "How did you even know I was out here?" she asked, meeting those golden eyes then, feeling eerily wary as a large hand came to rest on her shoulder, and she was acutely reminded of the differences between them, whether in terms of elves and humans, height, build, or other various ways. Concern radiated from him, that being the most prominent emotion radiating from him along with a sliver of annoyance. Because she was probably disturbing his beauty sleep, or whatever the elvish equivalent was. A sigh escaped her, low and long, even as she pulled her attention away from those almost magnetic, glowing eyes which were far too bright in the darkness of the night.
"I heard the sound of your door open," he said, and Sakura relaxed in the knowledge that no screams or whimpers or words otherwise had caught his attention so. Not that she would have made any. She had learnt how to do otherwise in Fornost Erain, lest she wish to be kicked out from her residence thanks to excessive noise. It had been hard enough to find accommodation, being what she was to them. There had been a point in her life there where she had seriously debated on the merits of just going off to live in the forest thanks to that same fact. But humans were social creatures. And even as cold and scorning as the residents of Fornost Erain had been, they had at least kept her from spiralling into her own memories and the misery and regrets they would only have brought more of. It did no good to linger long in one's head, nor did it do any good to be alone and surrounded by memories of past failure.
Sakura tilted her head, basking in the moonlight as it fell on her. Part of her felt energised by it, which she supposed was lucky, given how she wasn't too eager to try and get back to bed. The nightmares would only come again once more. "You have sharp ears," she murmured, amusement bubbling up in her then at the sight of those sharply pointed ears. "Though I suppose all elves do." Bitterness welled up within her, part of her wondering if she could have just been an elf and made this both so much simpler on the pair of them.
Glorfindel frowned beside her, emotions all over the place, bitterness, concern, regret, and disappointment making her spine stiffen. "Forgive me for asking," he said, and Sakura knew – she just knew – she was not going to like his next words. "But are you perhaps jealous of my being an elf?" he asked, those golden eyes seeming as though they were intent on revealing all, and Sakura could only meet such a stare for a few more moments before she looked away. Because, yes, she supposed she was just a bit jealous. But not because of him being an elf exactly. Rather because they were from two different races, and elves in particular had a sort of elitism which surrounded them and suffocated her like a blanket. Just her though. Not him. "You have always seemed… on the bitter side whenever elves or my kinfolk are mentioned."
A burst of laughter escaped her, just as biting of a sound as it always was. "I doubt it is what you think," she mumbled. "I am… I suppose I am just bothered by the fact that you are not what I expected. I never expected to be bound to an elf from another w—land, rather I thought it would be one of my people… and my people…" she trailed off, shoulders sinking as words somehow escaped her, and Sakura felt so very inexplicably tired of it all. Tired of the prospect of having to earn respect and acknowledgement for what would undoubtedly be the last time.
"Are dead," Glorfindel finished off almost absentmindedly, golden eyes growing distant even as she bristled at the blunt reminder of the state of her loved ones back beneath those other skies. Part of her only wondered if all elves were somehow socially inept in some ways, what with how all of them seemed to be so eager to stomp into the minefield which was her bloodied past and all the many, varying scars it had left upon her. They really loved to put their feet in their mouths. Or perhaps it was just the odd effect she seemed to have on the elves there. Or maybe it was because she was from the desert that they were so eager to tear the scabs off old wounds which had never quite healed correctly for their own amusement.
"That they are," she spat, hatred rising within her, deep and unfathomable, and indisputably shoved into a ball and bottled up deep within her. Sakura thought it was quite a feat. None of it had leaked into her chakra, and her face was as blissfully stony as ever. "I grieved for them, grieved for you in a way, I suppose. Then I find out you live, and you live here. Fate is a cruel, fickle thing at times. I was always meant to survive that which killed everyone I ever loved. I was always meant to end up here, in lands which despise me for merely breathing the same air as them and daring to live amongst—"
Fingers dug into her shoulder then, the warmth settled there telling her of the hand situated there now, squeezing gently, and Sakura became acutely aware of how loud and bitter of a tone her voice had taken. "Forgive my words. I became lost in my own thoughts," he said, shame roiling through him amongst other things. "Your loss is much more recent than my own, and wounds of the heart take a much longer time to heal than hurts of the body… They cloud the mind in shadow, and linger long after time has erased all trace of their passing."
"I cannot argue with that," Sakura murmured, anger ebbing, annoyance replacing it for letting her emotions take a hold of her and reveal that much. Weakness, part of her whispered, that shinobi part of her whispering of how it was a terrible idea to give the enemy knowledge of where it hurt. But Glorfindel wasn't supposed to be an enemy, nor were the elves completely unaware that her people were dead. She had basically stated as much in that fateful dinner earlier that very day or the day before, depending on how long she had slept for. She couldn't quite tell. "Have you… lost someone too?" she asked. Now who's being the insensitive one, Sakura-chan? Naruto's ghost asked, even as Sasuke's ghost grunted in the background, and she could just picture his stern mien as he nodded in agreement with what their beloved blonde had said. Not that they were truly haunting her. She knew she would have loved that in some sort of sick way – if she could interact with some sort of remnant of them, listened to them speak, and possibly comfort her if they felt so inclined. She also knew she would have hated living with the very proof she had failed to keep them alive – that she had abandoned them – and she likely would have been in a worse state mentally, should they had been spectres constantly peering over her shoulder. Because at the end of the day she had failed them. She had abandoned them so, when she should have been able to save them like the medic she was. Tears bit at the corners of her eyes. Because those who abandoned their friends were worse than scum. "Forgive me," she mumbled, coming to her senses then, and she shoved the creeping misery which wanted to consume her deep down along with her anger, bottling them up together. They were never to see the light of day. "That was insensitive of me…"
The hand on her shoulder didn't move. His grip on her didn't become rebuking. Rather it simply felt as warm and soft as it had for the past few minutes. "I have," Glorfindel said, voice sounding that much leveller than her own. He sounded as calm as anything, even talking about such a thing as the loss of those he had loved. "You would have found out soon enough. It is a well-known event documented in our histories… Erestor, or perhaps another would have let word slip sooner or later."
Sakura blinked, mulling over those words for a few quiet seconds, only able to look into those golden eyes and slowly comprehend that her soulmate was ancient. "You," she said, her lips moving of their own volition, "are really old." Her green eyes remained locked with those golden ones, gaze so very intent that she startled at the sound of rich laughter rolling through the air. She blinked once more, trying to match up the image of the ancient being she had seen only a moment before with the cheery golden-haired elf who was laughing at her so very merrily. She didn't quite understand what was so funny. But he was laughing at something she had said. Surely that meant there was hope for them both together yet. Her heart didn't stir, and Sakura could only stare at Glorfindel as his laughter faded away though his smile remained, bright and cheery as ever.
"I was born long before the sun and moon came into being," he said, a well of odd nostalgia overcoming him as he continued to stare at her like she was some sort of curious specimen. Sakura decided against unpacking such a statement of being older than the sun and moon. She couldn't help but wonder what had come before the sun and moon in that place. "I cannot deny being old. Far older than you yourself…" He had obviously waited a very long time to meet her, or so she thought as he continued staring at her with those ancient golden eyes which only served to remind her how far removed she was from the being before her. It was no wonder there was always a hint of disappointment which lingered whenever he interacted with her, no matter the bright expression or happiness he showed at the sight of her. She wasn't what he had expected. Neither was he what she had expected. Sakura didn't know how to feel about that, nor did she know what to truly think.
She broke their odd little stare off they had going on, turning back to the moonlight and starlight which shone down on her instead. "I suppose that makes me rather young in your eyes then," she mumbled, tightening her grip on her blanket then. "Are you not… disappointed with that which you received for a soulmate?" she asked, continuing to stare out of the window then, not wanting to face him, if only because she didn't think she had the courage to say those words straight to his face. Part of her feared the answer either way. Either he would admit to the disappointment or he would lie about it. Sakura didn't know which answer she would prefer: the white lie or the harsh truth. Her shoulders sunk, even as those fingers curled around her shoulder. They weren't as broad as his, and his hands were annoyingly larger than her own.
Glorfindel sighed. "We are barely more than strangers to each other, you told me once before. I do not know enough about you, I fear, to be disappointed for any reason," he said, and Sakura mused on the slight deflection and sort of white lie she had been given.
Sakura hummed at that, as if contemplating his words as they spoke beneath the moon and stars. "I only wish the rest of Imladris would perchance feel the same," she remarked. "There will be many who will not simply accept me," she said, folding her arms then, blanket billowing about as the breeze struck once more. She closed her eyes, letting the wind fan over her face. "I am to be yet another foreigner, and, Glorfindel, I am tired of it all…" She turned to face him once more, glancing at the hand which adjusted its grip and remained on her shoulder, an oddly comforting weight despite the unfamiliarity of it all. She wondered if that were why her lips felt so very loose then, and why the filter she normally had in place was failing her there. "For some reason I thought I would be able to bear it all without care or pause," she said, meeting those golden eyes which were narrowed, his face set into something which looked like upset. "I thought it would not matter, because this is to be the last time I am treated as such, because I have finally found my soulmate…"
"You did not seem as worried when you went to rest before," Glorfindel murmured, more to himself than anyone else. "Tell me, what brought this about line of thought? Was it your bad dream – the one which woke you so?" he asked, concern rising within him once more. "Is there anything you wish for me to do to make your acclimatisation any easier?"
"Perhaps because I am physically tired as well as mentally tired," she said, frowning at how very… chatty she seemed to be. She couldn't remember ever being as talkative as that before. But perhaps it was because she was tired, reaching the end of her tether with it all, and her soulmate was standing before her. There was probably a part of her somewhere within her which still believed in the happiness a soulmate was said to grant. "I just wanted to tell you of that fact," she mumbled, rubbing at her eyes then as tiredness ate at them. But she knew that she wouldn't be able to get back to sleep as she was then. The memories of their deaths were still far too vivid within her mind. She would only have yet another nightmare if she tried to close her eyes and fall back asleep. "Because I will likely snap at some point…"
Those golden eyes narrowed yet again, the grip on her shoulder tightening ever so slightly. "Should such an event occur," Glorfindel said, expression softening. "I will comfort you as best I am capable, and strive to help you ensure such an event does not happen once more."
Sakura blinked, laughter escaping her before she could help it, heart beating in her chest because her soulmate was so very kind. But barking up the complete wrong tree. He thought her harmless, she realised, pearls of laughter still rolling through the air at the thought of her – Haruno Sakura – being harmless. That was something she had once striven to ensure she wasn't. And she was no longer just that, even if she had been masquerading as a seamstress who wouldn't harm a fly for the past several years. She was anything but that. Sakura knew that much, just as she knew her skills hadn't deteriorated unlike the state of her muscles. And it wasn't like she truly needed to be utterly ripped to do the damage she specialised in. "Is that how you think I would snap?" she asked him, wondering what flight of madness had taken a hold of her then. Truly, she blamed the lack of sleep and the fact that there was a part of her which so longed for her soulmate and that fated happiness she had thought, until all too recently, would be forever out of her reach. She stepped forwards then, brushing off that grip on her shoulder to prod at his terribly solid chest. "Me snapping will not merely be a case of me breaking down and crying," she said, meeting those golden eyes which were staring at her with something akin to sheer bewilderment. She poked his chest again. "There is a lot of anger buried within me, Glorfindel," she stated plainly. "I fear that when I snap it will all escape at once, and let me tell you this – there will be blood spilled if that is the case, and none of it will be mine." She stared up at him, watching as bewilderment lingered for a while longer, fear and indignation rising in place as his confusion fled.
Golden eyes stared down at her, his expression becoming stern. Almost wrathful, or at the very least promising that. "Lothris," he began, voice much colder than what it had been previous. Sakura wondered if it were partially because she had laughed at him for so long before. "Are you… threatening the safety of those in Imladris?" he demanded, looking almost as if he would start shaking her by the very shoulders he had held so comfortingly before if she didn't start talking – didn't start explaining herself and her words. "I am Captain of the Guard in Imladris, and I am honour bound to protect its residents from harm… whether that be from external threat, or internal threat," he spoke, and Sakura only smiled widely at that, not looking away from those golden eyes which looked as though they would burn right through her if she continued on the same tracks as she was. "This is not something to jest of."
"Who says I am jesting?" she asked, staring up at him with eyes she knew glittered dangerously. They had always been such a vivid colouring, a very poisonous green. Yet green was also the colour of the medical chakra she used. Too much medicine could be a poison in the end. Not that her soulmate appreciated that much or the blank stare she was giving him in response to his demands. Golden eyes narrowed dangerously, almost seeming to glow that much more brightly beneath the light of the silvery moon. Gold and silver was such a nice pairing of colours.
Glorfindel stared down at her with something more akin to a glare, all but silently demanding answers before things started happening. "Lothris," he repeated, and part of her relished in it all. Sakura-chan, Naruto's ghost whispered scoldingly, reminding her of why she had shoved away all that rage and the lingering want to fight. What was the point in fighting if there was nothing to fight for? She had thought herself miserable. She had the thought the anger of her treatment at the hands of Fornost Erain would silently drain away as years went by. Yet there she was, feeling as though she were a teakettle about to start boiling over with rage. She was tired and so very angry at everything. Never a good combination. "I am required to take threats seriously," he said, continuing to glare and demand answers silently with those inhuman eyes of his alone. "So please tell me what you mean by your words. Are you claiming you will be a threat to the residents of Imladris?"
"My," she mumbled, "you speak as if I am not also a resident of Imladris…"
He paused at that, her words bringing him up short, and Sakura oddly hated the part of her which relished in such a reaction. My, how bitter have you become, Sakura? Sasuke's ghost asked of her, and shame welled up within her before she shoved it down. It wasn't like she could change what she had become, and she could happily lay the blame at the feet of Fornost Erain. If he hated her for it, then clearly fate had decided to pair the wrong people together, or so she thought bitterly, hating the entity which was fate. The entity which had decided that she alone was to survive and make it out from her barren, ruined world. "That is not what I meant by my words," he said, hands dropping back to his sides, and part of her couldn't help but mourn the loss of that touch on her shoulder. An attempt to comfort her. It was probably a privilege she had lost with her actions. With the anger and bitterness which had been building and festering over the past several years.
"But it is how it comes across," she said flatly. "And it is how everyone will treat me here. Of that I have no doubt, if only because everyone I have met here has done nothing to indicate otherwise. Even though you claimed I would be welcomed here… I know a lie when I hear one," she continued, glaring back into those golden eyes. "Tell me, when the elves here – when your kin – begin to make me feel as if I do not belong, as though I am unworthy, as though I do not meet the expectations placed upon me, as though I am a foreigner unwelcome here… when they make me feel threatened… Tell me, Lord Glorfindel, will you protect me then? Or will the actual, proper residents of Imladris take precedence?"
Glorfindel stared at her, face drawn in a frown, silent then, hands clenched and curled into fists which Sakura eyed up warily. His jaw tightened as he mulled over her words, and Sakura wondered if the answer would be another white lie. A claim that 'she would take precedence because she was his soulmate'. Gold clashed with green, the pair of them staring at each other in silence, and Sakura wondered about how naïve she had once been – to think that soulmates would meet, fall in love in an instant, and live happily ever after. She barely knew Glorfindel. She had no right to try and make him chose her over his kin, when she knew logically the answer would be anything but the one she wanted to hear. And she hated empty promises more than anything after Fornost Erain. Empty words were just that – empty. They meant nothing at the end of the day. "You are not answering the question I posed you before," he said, voice tight. "Are you a threat to the residents of Imladris?" Her feet moved almost of their own volition, kicking his legs out from under him, and she followed him down, knees on either side of his body, hands landing palm down on either side of his head, his golden hair a pool of silky locks spreading out beneath him. "Lothris?" Glorfindel spoke, sounding that much more hesitant and confused as she grinned down at him, all teeth and threat.
"Even the most timid of wolves will bite back when cornered," she said, staring down at him as they stayed in those positions, her soulmate making no moves to try and throw her off of him. "That is what I am now, Glorfindel," she stated. "A cornered animal in a hostile environment." A ticking time bomb. A faulty explosive note ready to go off at the slightest change in the environment about it. "I have been downtrodden and reviled. People have not treated me kindly, and I am reaching the limit of tolerance of such treatment towards me." She lifted a hand then, cupping one cheek and running a thumb beneath the skin of his eye. "So, yes," she said flatly. "I am a threat in that manner, unless you believe your kin will be nothing but kind to me, that is." A grim smile pulled at her lips at the feelings which radiated from him in that instant. They both knew better than to put stock in something like that.
A choked gasp made her freeze, too late registering the two new presences in the corridor. Briefly, her mind reminded her that they were in public and that pinning elves down probably offended someone's sensibilities somewhere. Sakura looked up, turning her head so she was staring at the two brunettes who were now standing in the middle of the corridor, just beyond the bend they had rounded so very quickly. Grey eyes narrowed on her then, gazes flickering between her and Glorfindel, and Sakura briefly wondered why they seemed so familiar before everything started happening very quickly. "Glorfindel!" one of the brunettes – who couldn't be anything other than brother, likely twins, given how similar their appearances were – cried. "Release him!"
Sakura grinned, a wry, twisted, miserable thing, feeling the suspicion and anger radiating from the pair there. All because she had dared to pin down their beloved 'Lord Glorfindel'. Her eyes narrowed at the fact they hadn't added the title 'Lord' before his name. Of high status, her mind provided numbly, even as a hand met her shoulder and shoved her over and off her soulmate. She didn't fight it as she could have. Really, she mused wretchedly, they were only proving the point she had made before. Her shoulder slammed into the hard stone flooring, pain throbbing up her arm at the harsh impact, watching out of the corner of her eye as the one who had pushed her away began trying to help Glorfindel to his feet. She stood up then, reaching down only to pick up the blanket which had been thrown off to the side at one point. Part of her felt triumphant, while the other part felt miserable as she looked at Glorfindel and wondered how he was supposed to grant her happiness when his kin were seemingly intent on doing anything but. Wrapping her blanket back around her shoulders, gingerly touching her throbbing shoulder, keeping eye contact with those golden eyes all the while, she stood up straight. The suspicion and anger from the brunettes hadn't stopped, and if anything it only grew, while her soulmate's shame, misery, disappointment, and irritation rose up. "You said on the road that I would be welcomed in Imladris," she said, letting her gaze meet all three of those stares directed her way. She stepped back, pulling her blanket further around her shoulders as she crossed her arms over her chest. Those golden eyes stared at her, regret heavy in the air, but Sakura hardened her heart to it. Regret didn't change anything in the end, and she knew that better than anyone else. "Liar," she stated flatly, meeting that golden eyed gaze which flickered to the floor in shame. That act in itself didn't make her feel better in the end. All it did was make her feel vindicated in her suspicions of the fact that she would only be exposed to the same old scorn and suspicion within Imladris. Part of her had thought it would be different and the disappointment was almost palpable on her tongue, a biting and bitter flavouring as it was.
The best things about that place were the soft beds and the abundancy of hot water. Sakura wondered if that would help her calm the rage which wanted to boil over within her. It's not good to bottle things up, Kakashi-sensei had once said – the damned hypocrite, master of bottling up feelings and refusing to acknowledge them. A snort of laughter escaped her, bitterness following soon behind at the reminder that Kakashi was dead. She was following in his footsteps – not in the dead part, obviously – but she supposed all she was missing were the crippling attachment issues and the pack of dogs. The former, though, was probably near enough a work in progress. Is that why you're avoiding your soulmate and picking out the faults in what he says, Sakura… to distance yourself? Sasuke's ghost asked, even as she walked away with the weight of three stares boring into her back: one regretful and hurt, the other two suspicious and watchful. As though she might turn around and lunge and lash out at them all. Her hands curled into fists, and she increased her walking speed, throwing herself around corners, all too eager to get away from the trio far behind her by then.
She didn't have the slightest of clues as to how to get back, lost and unfamiliar as she was with Imladris in general, and so she stopped in her furious pacing to eye up the new courtyard in front of her. It was one she was fairly sure she had seen before – a wide one with a tree within its bounds. Sakura looked upon the tree, part of her wanting nothing more than to merge with it the way only mokuton users could and hide away for a year or seven. But she was trying to be a normal human, and normal humans couldn't do just that beneath those stars. So she was stuck out there, hand reaching out to grab at the stone frame – the stone pillar which split up two of the windows leading to the outside. Anger pulsed beneath her skin along with chakra, and a familiar creak of branch and tree had her head snapping up and her rage shoved back inside the bottle within her chest. Unlike Kakashi, she had more of a motivation than trauma and problems with feelings to keep those rampant, darker emotions of hers buried deep. Her grasp on stone tightened, eyes widening at the spiderweb of cracks which spread from the slight handprint she had made in solid stone. Hands curled into fists, a wave of anger at her situation – the same situation she was constantly finding herself in thanks to the hatred of those of the desert in those lands – overcoming her then, and she gave into the temptation to punch something.
Stone crumbled beneath the force of her blow, the sound abruptly loud amidst the silence of the night, and Sakura could only curse at her impulsivity and let her chakra translocate her from the corridor with bits of stone littering in and outside of it, to the lowest, largest branch of the tree in the greenery of the courtyard. "What was that sound?" an all too familiar voice asked, and Sakura could only sit down on the tree branch and scowl in the direction of one of those twins as the familiar group of three rounded the corner and came face to face with a casualty of her anger. The poor pillar had never stood a chance against her, she mused wryly. "Do you think that desert woman came this way?" he questioned, as though the shattered remains of the pillar would answer him. Sakura could only sneer at him, limbs tensing at the sight of those golden locks and golden eyes looking so very out of place compared to the browns and greys of the twins who were seemingly accompanying him.
"We can only hope she did not injure herself, if she perhaps leant against this pillar when it crumbled," the other twin said, and Sakura resisted the overwhelming urge to scoff and roll her eyes. As if such a thing would hurt her, and even if it could, she was fully capable of healing herself, not that anyone was seemingly going to acknowledge that fact, least of all because Sakura wanted them to. "We will have to inform father to have someone repair this," he continued, and Sakura could only blink as the knowledge of who they were came to her then. The sons of Lord Elrond. Their names began with an E if she was remembering correctly, and she mused on it for a split second before deciding she didn't particularly care. They had pushed her off Glorfindel, injuring her in the process – a mild injury she hadn't bothered to heal. If only so she could flinch if anyone decided to touch that shoulder.
"Her name is Lothris," her soulmate said, frowning at the missing pillar and the shattered pieces of stone around it. "I would wager she is lost by now though," he added, and Sakura scowled at the reminder that she had no idea of how to get back to her rooms from that place. And she rather wanted to go back to her rooms then and there, if only to try and catch some more shut-eye now that her walk and talk had taken her mind off those memories. There was a chance she wouldn't have another nightmare. A slim one, but a chance nonetheless. "You should both return to your rooms," Glorfindel said, golden eyes narrowing. "I will find my soulmate by myse—" His voice cut off all of a sudden, and Sakura glanced back over towards him, scowling as she met those golden eyes with her green ones. He was staring at her, eyes having uncannily found her there in her hiding spot amongst the leaves. "Lothris, what exactly are you doing?" he asked, venturing out from under the shelter of the building, coming to stand at the base of what was now her tree. The winds certainly called her the Princess of Trees enough that she felt as though she had a valid claim to declaring a tree as hers.
She arched one eyebrow. "I am sitting in a tree – what does it look like?" she grumbled blithely, burying her face in her hands as her soulmate opened his arms in an odd jump down and I will catch you pose, and Sakura finally took note of the fact there didn't seem to be many handholds in the tree, and she was fairly high up in the scheme of things. Ah, the joys of chakra. Though normal humans there couldn't walk down a tree like shinobi of her world could, and she was being a normal human of that world. "I can get down myself," she hissed, the hurts of earlier still lingering, no matter the apparent, inherent kindness her soulmate seemed to possess. Even if he was undoubtedly hurt or angry thanks to her. Her shoulders sunk, and she threw herself off the tree branch, deliberately aiming for a spot nowhere near where her soulmate lingered. She landed on the ground silently, crouched down, chakra thrumming in her legs as she rose to her full height seconds later. Her arms folded, and she turned to meet those golden eyes which regarded her curiously and almost warily as he edged over to her.
The twins had left by that point, and Sakura only pulled her blanket further around her shoulders even as Glorfindel edged closer as though she actually were a cornered wolf about to bite. "I was worried you would become lost," he said, ever willing to help out a maiden in distress. Chivalry and all that. Even if he was obviously unhappy with said maiden. Though Sakura supposed she had threatened the people he cared about in a way. But he hadn't let her finish.
"Then you were correct to worry," she replied, gritting her teeth at the perceived weakness – one which would remain until she familiarised herself with all of Imladris. Sakura wondered if they would truly let one 'of the desert' know the locations of everyone and everything in that place, or whether it would have to be something earned through the good behaviour she was becoming tired of having to put up. "I am currently, at this point in time, very lost," she said, glaring at the hand offered out to her until her soulmate got the message and let his arm fall back to his side. She wondered how terrible it might make her seem in the eyes of others – to reject a perceived kindness from their precious Lord Glorfindel who was so very loved by them all. Sadril had made it clear in word, unspoken indications, and the way she had always addressed him by his title of Lord. Truly, she was nothing much compared to that, nothing compared to the implied feats her soulmate had to have achieved. Only a failure who hadn't managed to save a single one of her friends or family.
"Is there anywhere you wish to venture?" he asked, tilting his head and looking at her curiously. "We could take a walk around the grounds of the main house, if you would like, should the remnants of your dream still linger over you, unless you would sooner return to your rooms to rest, that is."
"I would very much like to return to my rooms," she said, blinking placidly as her soulmate nodded at that. "Thank you," she added, reminding herself that manners were probably important. And she had certainly been rude enough for the night. Her fingers raked through her dry black locks, a soft sigh escaping her as she mulled over how deep of a hole she had dug for herself with ill thought out words and a lifetime of bitterness to boot. She blamed the lack of sleep and the nightmare before for all of her earlier actions.
Glorfindel looked at her once more, before inclining his head, indicative she should follow him, and led her back into the maze of corridors she had all but run through earlier to get away from it all. "You never answered that which I asked before," Glorfindel said, and her shoulders tensed once again. "Are you a threat to Imladris?" he asked once more, and something told her it was the last time he would ask as such. There was a part of her which didn't want to be thrown away, kicked out from Imladris for mere words spoken in anger, misunderstood as their intention had been.
Sakura sighed, low and long. "Of course I am," she mumbled. "But that was not the reason I told you as such…" She stopped in her walking, Glorfindel pausing in his stride in an instant, and Sakura felt those golden eyes fix on her once more. It was strange, how she was so very sensitive to that stare, and Sakura briefly wondered if it had anything to do with the nature of elves or whether it was because they were bound by an inexplicable connection – the tie of souls to one another. "Should I lose myself to my anger," she said, meeting her soulmate's stare once more, locking eyes with him as she spoke. "If such an event comes to pass, then things which should remain asleep will awaken," she explained, knowing the trees around them would wake with wrath, eager to seek out that which had hurt her so. They would care for nothing in their path, more so if they were ones grown directly by herself rather than the ones which already existed. And the trees which already stood there, old and ancient as they were beneath the bark, were already quite lethal to that which they deemed her enemies. Sakura didn't know if she would be able to stop them, should they mark Imladris and Fornost as their enemies, and such a thought was daunting. "You might just be the only person in this world who can stop me, or at least calm me down," she murmured. "It sounds a bit silly, perhaps, but that is the truth I believe, and if you cannot stop me and my anger in its tracks…" she trailed off, remembering those trees she had grown in her anger, remembering the way they had grown and attacked Kaguya, uncaring as to the bodies of her friends and family who had fallen around her. "Then I do not know what could…" Even Kaguya, as powerful as she had been, hadn't been able to stop the trees and their wrath until she had displaced her from that world into her new current one. The world she had always meant to be displaced into, if the mark on her forehead stood for anything.
Part of her wondered if Kaguya would follow her into that world, but as the years had gone by, that thought, that fear, had grown smaller and smaller. There was no reason for her to do as such. Just as Sakura had no reason to try and return to her original world. "I will not take a blade to you," he promised, eyebrows lowered and drawn in concern, wrathful visage fading until it was the same Glorfindel she had grown used to staring at her with palpable worry and confusion. The same ellon who was indisputably kind to all, and that included her. She was hardly special in that respect.
"I am not asking you to," she said, meeting that confused gold stare with her blank one. "All I am asking is for you to calm me down as best you can, should things reach such a point. That is not too much to ask, is it?" she wondered. "I told you before – blood would be spilled, and none would be mine. Perhaps you did not stop to think that I would not wish such a thing upon your people… I am not the kind of person who would want to see people dead, and it hurts to think you might have perceived me that way… but I suppose I cannot blame you as such. You and I have both said it before – that we are little more than strangers to each other," she said, one hand clutching her blanket around herself, while the other clawed at the fabric of her nightdress over her heart. It hurt somewhat, despite the truth that she shouldn't have expected anything to be any other way. "Then again, perhaps I should not have assumed you would be able to fathom what I meant from my original words alone…" she trailed off, smiling as best she could with her stony face. "People usually interpret my words in the worst of ways. I do not know why I thought it might be different," she mumbled, feelings wavering between righteous indignation and misery at the overtaking feelings of shame and regret which radiated from the ellon beside her as they approached a familiar corridor.
Wind whistled through her dry, black locks, and part of her mourned for her pink locks with their silky, shiny texture. Sadril's mention of her being judged for her appearance coming back to slam into her like a punch to the gut. But she was still trying to blend in. She tilted her head, reminding herself that she would soon have to venture into the forest in search of the usual blend of ingredients she used to dye them that more natural colour in those lands. And perhaps sneak about to raid the kitchen in that respect too. A soft sigh escaped her, the lingering wish to just forget it all, or perhaps take up residence in the forest instead almost overwhelming her as she rubbed at her eyes. Her bed was calling to her. Sakura only prayed she would be able to get some peaceful, uninterrupted sleep until the sun rose once more and the night passed.
She eyed up the door to what were her rooms in those lands, a mixture of regret and relief swirling within her – because on one hand, she had said some of the worst things on her mind, and saying them aloud had been like taking a weight off from her chest, but on the other hand, it had probably soured things between her and Glorfindel. If there had even truly been anything between them beyond a relationship of that of strangers. She had been cruel somewhat in her wording, and nobody liked someone who was cruel, even if only in anger. But that was just the person who she was by then. Try as she might, there was little Sakura could do to change that fact, more so when the situation around her which had given birth to that facet of her personality hadn't changed except in location. She sighed yet again, feeling as though she were probably doing that a bit too much. And then there was the fact that such sighs earnt too much of a concerned stare from her soulmate who was still standing beside her still. "I am sorry for my words," she murmured, wishing she had just stayed in her room rather than going outside as she had done – leading to the wreckage which was the barest beginnings of a relationship beyond that of strangers. "I suppose I am just a bit too bitter, and the change of locations and culture was a bit too much of shock for me," she said, turning to face her soulmate then, forcing her lips to move into what she hoped was a somewhat happy, apologetic smile. "Then there is the fact that my lack of peaceful sleep likely brought out the worst in me, and so, once again, you have my apologies for that."
Glorfindel stared at her yet again, golden eyes deep and unfathomably old. "Do not be," he said, a smile on his face despite the shame and upset still swirling beneath the calm, kind façade he wore, and that just wouldn't do. She bit her lip at the sight of him, hating the smile on his face despite the hurt she knew he felt. Gone was the feeling of vindictive anger and pride at having made her soulmate miserable. In its place was regret and the urge to make it up to him. Make it right, Sakura-chan, Naruto's ghost whispered in her ear. Sakura supposed she ought to do that much, despite the fact that her name wasn't Uzumaki Naruto and it never would be. Just because she wasn't as cheerful and happy as her dead bright sun of a best friend.
"No," she said, meeting those golden eyes which somehow had brought out the worst and the best of her in a single night. "I hurt you with my words," she remarked, frowning then. "I am not that small of a woman to not own up to my words and how they hurt everyone. I suppose I am just too used to people being out to get me – intent on ripping me down, and I learnt to do the same in reverse. I learnt how to say the right things to make them feel terrible about themselves, if only to get them to back away and bother me no longer. I do not wish to do the same to you," she said, smiling ashamedly and breaking eye contact then. "That would simply be cruel of me when you have been nothing but kind to me for almost the entire time… even if you were perhaps disappointed with that which you received for a soulmate at the beginning." And even to that very moment. But who knew if that was something all soulmate's experienced at first – when the reality didn't match up to the ideals they had built in their heads. Disappointment could only be natural – more so when faced with her and everything she was.
"You," Glorfindel said, frowning down at her as they stood there in that same corridor where it had all began. "You are much more perceptive than one might assume," he murmured, smile turning into something less bright, more soft and natural or so it seemed to her eyes. Sakura wondered how long he had spent practicing his facial expressions. She wondered how long it would take for her to be able to do the exact same thing. "I think you will fit in amongst my kin well, given time," he said, fingers twitching then for one reason or another. Sakura resisted the overwhelming urge to scoff at his words, accepting them instead, despite the parts of her which wanted to throw back such words. The same parts of her which lingered on the way she had been shoved away from Glorfindel by those twins.
"I hope so too," she said, wondering whether it was an honest wish or a filthy lie which had just slipped from her lips then and there.
He looked at her once more – the usual kind, curious look – gaze flickering between the door to her rooms and herself. "You told me before that I was old," he said, lips curling up in mirth at the reminder of her earlier words. Before she had let the anger, bitterness, and hatred spew forth unchecked. "You think yourself so very young in comparison, but I find myself questioning just how young you might be," he stated, golden eyes narrowing then, searching her face as though it might have whatever answers he sought. "You are of the second kindred, born after the sun and moon were set in the skies… yet there is something about you, a shadow upon your face, a whisper of something more which lingers about your person long after you have left." Glorfindel stared at her still, eyes that much more intense, seeming as though they were staring past her body and straight into her soul instead. "To my eyes, it seems ancient and heavy, yet wholly mysterious in nature, as if shrouded from my gaze by cloud and shadow."
Sakura blinked, staring at him in response, trying to comprehend what he had just said, part of her wondering if he spoke of her chakra. But why would chakra seem ancient and heavy to him? She could only frown at that, all the while wondering what she was supposed to say in response to that. All in all, she had likely said more than she had in an entire year within the walls of Fornost Erain in a single evening with her soulmate – whether it be snapping at him for one thing or another or attempting to hold an actual, proper conversation. "Well," she said, smiling as best she could with that face of hers. "If you do figure out what the mystery is, please let me know," she continued, all the while wondering about his words. After all, there was nothing from her world which should have seemed ancient in his eyes, given how her world was undoubtedly younger, and didn't have a time before the sun and the moon as far as she knew. Even chakra hadn't really existed until that thing came and rained hell down upon them all.
Glorfindel smiled back at her, and she nodded then, deciding that was a very opportune time in which to vanish back into her rooms with a whispered, "Good night, again." She hardly wanted to say anything callous or cutting to him once more. That would do neither of them any good, and would only serve to make things that much more awkward when they next saw each other.
The familiar room was like a balm to her tired, angry self, and she flopped down on the bed then, yawning as tiredness came to attack her eyelids once more. She felt so terribly heavy and exhausted, both physically and mentally. Sakura thought she could likely attribute part of it towards the fact that she had spoken the most she ever had in one night for the past however many years. Interacting with people was going to be rather hard, she mused, lying there, cheek smooshed against the pillowy soft mattress she was lying upon. She wondered how it could possibly be made easier, without going through the motions of tripping over unspoken social landmines as Erestor had done earlier. A snort escaped her at the thought of doing just that, and making a nuisance out of herself.
She crawled up the bed then, tucking herself beneath the covers as best as possible, all the while wondering about what her soulmate was doing next door. Part of her envied her, what with elves getting to sleep differently to that of mere mortals. Sakura only wondered if he had any nightmares like she. Somehow she doubted it. But musing on such thoughts did nothing for her, and so she pushed them to one side along with the blatant bitterness which had accompanied them. Her eyes closed, and Sakura chose to focus on her soulmate, rather than any other lingering thoughts which wanted to surface.
At least that way, she might have the slightest of chances at having a somewhat peaceful dream. Or at least one which was more pleasant than the usual landscapes of death and destruction which she dreamed of.